A Strange Hill Christmas

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0:00:02 > 0:00:03Mwah-ha-ha!

0:00:03 > 0:00:05# Creepy ain't the word Freaky ain't the word

0:00:05 > 0:00:07# Sneaky ain't the word See, what I've observed

0:00:07 > 0:00:10# Is there's no easy way To describe this stinky place

0:00:10 > 0:00:12# Even geeky place doesn't tell you what I need to say

0:00:12 > 0:00:14# This is Strange Hill

0:00:14 > 0:00:15# Where a talking frog could eat your face

0:00:15 > 0:00:18# It's very, very random You'll get used to these debates

0:00:18 > 0:00:19# If you stick around

0:00:19 > 0:00:20# Although I wouldn't recommend it

0:00:20 > 0:00:23# When they used the name "Strange", mate, they really meant it

0:00:23 > 0:00:26# There's some things in life with which you just don't mess

0:00:26 > 0:00:28# On every vest, I got the letters SOS

0:00:28 > 0:00:31# Cos you never known what might be lurking round the corner

0:00:31 > 0:00:33# And what it might do if it ever found or saw you

0:00:33 > 0:00:36# Keep the lights on in the hallways all day

0:00:36 > 0:00:39# Things won't always tend to go your way

0:00:39 > 0:00:41# Watch your back and be prepared

0:00:41 > 0:00:43# Can't wait for 3.30 - see you there!

0:00:43 > 0:00:45BELL RINGS

0:00:46 > 0:00:47CHRISTMAS MUSIC PLAYS

0:00:47 > 0:00:51- MISS GRIMSHAW:- It may be the last day before the Christmas holiday,

0:00:51 > 0:00:52but you better be at your desks,

0:00:52 > 0:00:54- frowning as usual. - GROANING

0:00:54 > 0:00:56I know I say this every Christmas

0:00:56 > 0:00:58and sometimes when it's not Christmas,

0:00:58 > 0:01:00but this is going to be the best Christmas ever!

0:01:00 > 0:01:01NO wishful thinking!

0:01:01 > 0:01:05Furn, school will be empty over holiday,

0:01:05 > 0:01:09so I brung you something so you'll know I'm thinking of ye.

0:01:09 > 0:01:13I think you're the only one happy to get a lump of coal for Christmas.

0:01:13 > 0:01:14HE LAUGHS

0:01:14 > 0:01:16NIMROD PLAYS "We Wish You A Merry Christmas"

0:01:16 > 0:01:19Nimrod, I'm glad you've got the spirit of the season.

0:01:19 > 0:01:21I was programmed to exhibit holiday cheer.

0:01:21 > 0:01:23Merry Christmas. You got an F.

0:01:23 > 0:01:25- You know what - I don't even care. - I did know that.

0:01:25 > 0:01:29The Christmas holiday is hours away. Two whole weeks without school.

0:01:29 > 0:01:32I'm just going to sit patiently and ride this term out.

0:01:32 > 0:01:34I can't wait! I need a break now!

0:01:34 > 0:01:37How can they even have a day before a holiday? It's cruel.

0:01:37 > 0:01:39- They're taunting us.- Today should be a holiday too -

0:01:39 > 0:01:41the day before holiday.

0:01:41 > 0:01:44By that logic, each day would be the one before holiday,

0:01:44 > 0:01:45therefore each day should be a holiday,

0:01:45 > 0:01:47therefore there would be no school days at all.

0:01:47 > 0:01:49Wicked.

0:01:49 > 0:01:53I'm gonna get us out early today, even if it takes me all day.

0:01:53 > 0:01:57- Two whole weeks without Tanner. I can't wait.- Where are you going?

0:01:57 > 0:02:00The Tanner Hotel in Mitchell, Cornwall.

0:02:00 > 0:02:02Thinking about this break the last few months

0:02:02 > 0:02:04- is the only thing that's kept me sane.- Barely.

0:02:04 > 0:02:05BELL RINGS

0:02:05 > 0:02:08There's got to be some way to bring this holiday sooner.

0:02:08 > 0:02:10Without tampering with the very fabric of time, right?

0:02:10 > 0:02:13Messing with that weird stuff has too many complications.

0:02:13 > 0:02:14I wish I could just break something.

0:02:14 > 0:02:17Come on, feed pipe! Why aren't you steaming?

0:02:17 > 0:02:20- BANG! - Cos you're a post tube, that's why.

0:02:20 > 0:02:24Oh, now to wait out the remainder of this term in peace.

0:02:24 > 0:02:26BANGING, CLANKING HE SCREAMS

0:02:26 > 0:02:30Why is Murdoch getting so mad? I mean, beside the fact he's Murdoch?

0:02:30 > 0:02:33Because it's his job to maintain a comfortable temperature

0:02:33 > 0:02:34at the school at all times.

0:02:34 > 0:02:36If it ever gets too cold in the building,

0:02:36 > 0:02:38the school board will force Abercrombie to close...

0:02:38 > 0:02:40Whoa, whoa, whoa. Why didn't you say this before?

0:02:40 > 0:02:42Because you might use this information

0:02:42 > 0:02:44to run off and do something stupid with it.

0:02:44 > 0:02:46He ran off stupidly thataways.

0:02:50 > 0:02:53- Phew! We caught you before you could...- Duck!

0:02:53 > 0:02:57So throwing a bunch of textbooks in the furnace achieves nothing

0:02:57 > 0:03:01- temperature-wise.- Mitchell!- Why don't you just fiddle with the control?

0:03:01 > 0:03:04- Templeton!- Well, which way is cooler and which way is hotter?

0:03:04 > 0:03:08You could just mess about until you found the right one.

0:03:08 > 0:03:09Becky!

0:03:13 > 0:03:14Ooh. We can't have that.

0:03:17 > 0:03:18That's better.

0:03:18 > 0:03:21I think you just made it hotter.

0:03:23 > 0:03:25GROANING

0:03:27 > 0:03:29Life imitates art.

0:03:30 > 0:03:34It's just making things hotter. What kind of screwy furnace is this?

0:03:34 > 0:03:36- One that works properly. - HE GROANS

0:03:36 > 0:03:38Ah! Whoops! Not any more.

0:03:38 > 0:03:42ROARING, CREAKING, HISSING

0:03:42 > 0:03:45- Mitchell, I hope you learned your lesson.- I certainly did.

0:03:45 > 0:03:48By doing things I was told not to, I got exactly what I wanted.

0:03:48 > 0:03:50This is going to be the greatest act of idiocy ever.

0:03:52 > 0:03:55THEY SHIVER

0:03:55 > 0:03:59- Is it cold in here, or is it just me?- I'm thinking a little of both.

0:03:59 > 0:04:01Temperature and attitude.

0:04:01 > 0:04:04It's working! Any minute now, they'll have to close the school.

0:04:04 > 0:04:07Attention, fellow school sufferers -

0:04:07 > 0:04:11we will be getting an early dismissal today courtesy of yours truly.

0:04:11 > 0:04:15Ah, class - I know it's cold, so let's talk of something merry that

0:04:15 > 0:04:19will warm our hearts - The Black Death.

0:04:19 > 0:04:21I see Mr B's full of Christmas joy.

0:04:21 > 0:04:23He always gets this way around the holidays.

0:04:23 > 0:04:26Maybe it's cos he's got no-one and lives at the school.

0:04:26 > 0:04:28I get crabby having to spend a few hours here.

0:04:28 > 0:04:31Imagine spending a lifetime - and you're immortal.

0:04:31 > 0:04:33He must have some contact with the outside world.

0:04:33 > 0:04:35HORN HONKS

0:04:35 > 0:04:37MUSIC: "Postman Pat Theme"

0:04:37 > 0:04:40HE SHIVERS

0:04:40 > 0:04:43The furnace has blown out. It's gotten very nippy here.

0:04:43 > 0:04:47- Can you get the chill out?- I am pretty chilled out about it.- No.

0:04:47 > 0:04:50- I'M chilled.- You don't seem so. You should cool it.

0:04:50 > 0:04:52That's exactly what I don't want to happen!

0:04:52 > 0:04:54Now fix it, and don't give me any heat!

0:04:54 > 0:04:58- But I thought that's what you wanted.- Just do it!- Fine.

0:04:58 > 0:05:02- But you don't have to be so frosty. - But I AM frosty!

0:05:03 > 0:05:05HE SIGHS

0:05:05 > 0:05:08Oh. He's so sad and old and lonely.

0:05:08 > 0:05:10Let's help him!

0:05:10 > 0:05:13I was going to use those same reasons to run away, but OK.

0:05:13 > 0:05:16Mr B, do you have a place to go to for Christmas?

0:05:16 > 0:05:18I've got plenty of places.

0:05:18 > 0:05:22I mean, I have places I could go, but I'd rather stay here.

0:05:22 > 0:05:25But you're immortal! That means you've been lonely forever.

0:05:25 > 0:05:28Like my Aunt Doris - though she does have her kettle collection.

0:05:28 > 0:05:30I like the kettle that looks like a cat.

0:05:30 > 0:05:33Though, one of her many actual cats developed a friendship with it

0:05:33 > 0:05:34and now she can't use it

0:05:34 > 0:05:36cos the cat gets upset to see it on a fiery stove.

0:05:36 > 0:05:38- Are you quite done?- Sorry. I just thought...

0:05:38 > 0:05:41You thought you could melt an old Scrooge's heart,

0:05:41 > 0:05:44and it would be just like A Christmas Carol.

0:05:44 > 0:05:47Sorry. Life doesn't work out like a Dickens novel.

0:05:47 > 0:05:50God bless us, everyone!

0:05:50 > 0:05:51HE SIGHS

0:05:51 > 0:05:53If you'll excuse me, I'm going to my office,

0:05:53 > 0:05:58where I can be alone with thousands of years of sad memories.

0:06:01 > 0:06:07It's so, so, so, so sad. Let's badger him into happiness!

0:06:07 > 0:06:11Badgers make everyone happy. They're the perfect holiday gift.

0:06:11 > 0:06:13- ABERCROMBIE:- Attention, school.

0:06:13 > 0:06:17As Mr Murdoch has been unable to repair the furnace, it is

0:06:17 > 0:06:21with the tiniest regret that I must close the school early.

0:06:21 > 0:06:23The Christmas holiday begins...

0:06:23 > 0:06:26Grabbing my suitcase and running to the door before you can get there!

0:06:26 > 0:06:29- ..now! - BANGING

0:06:30 > 0:06:31It won't budge!

0:06:35 > 0:06:37Yo, how about through a window?

0:06:37 > 0:06:40- That's how I broke into the headmaster's office.- Brilliant!

0:06:40 > 0:06:43I'd give you a commendation, but they all seem to be missing.

0:06:44 > 0:06:47MURDOCH GROANS

0:06:47 > 0:06:49It's froze shut!

0:06:51 > 0:06:55- Ooh, the phone is dead!- And there's, like, no phone reception.

0:06:55 > 0:07:00- And my iPod's stuck on a Nicki Minaj song.- Nicki Minaj! NICKI MINAJ!

0:07:00 > 0:07:02We're going to be stuck in school over Christmas!

0:07:02 > 0:07:05I really should stop trying to get out of things.

0:07:07 > 0:07:09Wish there was a way out of this.

0:07:09 > 0:07:13Everyone locked in school over Christmas? That's not good.

0:07:13 > 0:07:15BELLS JINGLE

0:07:15 > 0:07:18- THUDDING, HISSING - That's not good at all.

0:07:18 > 0:07:22- BECKY:- Maybe I can get someone's attention. There's a squirrel!

0:07:22 > 0:07:25He could be our only hope. Oh, Mr Squirrel!

0:07:25 > 0:07:28- SQUIRREL SQUEAKS - Squirrelly! Get help!

0:07:28 > 0:07:31Contact the Red Cross... Oh, who am I kidding?

0:07:31 > 0:07:34It's just a squirrel. He has no idea of holidays!

0:07:34 > 0:07:35SQUEAKING

0:07:35 > 0:07:37TRAIN HORN TOOTING

0:07:39 > 0:07:41Even the squirrels have abandoned us!

0:07:41 > 0:07:44We're stuck in school with no way out!

0:07:44 > 0:07:48- Why am I being punished like this? - Because it's your cosmic detention.

0:07:48 > 0:07:51Tanner! I know you're responsible for this.

0:07:51 > 0:07:54- For once, this fool is right. - Thank you. I think.

0:07:54 > 0:07:57You're the reason that I'm freezing this season, yo.

0:07:57 > 0:07:59KIDS GRUMBLING

0:07:59 > 0:08:03This is even worse than being accused of something I didn't do.

0:08:03 > 0:08:05I'm gonna get whoever blabbed about me doing this.

0:08:05 > 0:08:08That was you! You blabbed to everyone who would listen!

0:08:08 > 0:08:11At least it can't get any worse. We're already freezing.

0:08:11 > 0:08:15Then let's all warm up by going to the gym and doing 1,000 press-ups.

0:08:15 > 0:08:18- GROANING - Uh, Mr Creeper, don't you think

0:08:18 > 0:08:21we could do something with a little more Christmas spirit?

0:08:21 > 0:08:25You're right. We'll sing carols as we go. Come on, everyone.

0:08:25 > 0:08:29# Oh, come, all ye freezing

0:08:29 > 0:08:32CHILDREN: # Chilly and congealing

0:08:32 > 0:08:35# Oh, come, let us adore gym

0:08:35 > 0:08:39# Oh, come on, we abhor gym

0:08:39 > 0:08:42# I said that you'll adore gym

0:08:42 > 0:08:45# Or you'll give me 20 more. #

0:08:45 > 0:08:49- At least I have a partner in making things worse.- This is Christmas time.

0:08:49 > 0:08:52I want to make things better for the less fortunate.

0:08:52 > 0:08:53Let's check on Mr Balding.

0:08:53 > 0:08:57- You just want to avoid gym.- We are on holiday.- We're on holiday now?

0:08:57 > 0:09:02- You're not exactly as I remember you, but come on, Mum and Dad!- What?

0:09:04 > 0:09:08- HE GASPS - Ah! Mitchell.- Grandpa.

0:09:08 > 0:09:12No, Templeton, that's just Mr Balding - acting very suspiciously.

0:09:12 > 0:09:15When my grandpa acts suspiciously, he wants something,

0:09:15 > 0:09:18like love or food or to change his pyjamas.

0:09:18 > 0:09:20- HE STAMMERS - Ah, hello, children.

0:09:20 > 0:09:21Nothing to see here.

0:09:21 > 0:09:25- BELLS JINGLING - Or here. Quiet! Bah, humbug!

0:09:25 > 0:09:27- JINGLING CONTINUES - Like I said...nothing.

0:09:27 > 0:09:31- Come on, Baldy, you can't lie to the master.- You are very good.

0:09:31 > 0:09:35- Thanks, but you can't distract me with flattery either.- Look! A bat!

0:09:35 > 0:09:38Nice try, but you're going to tell us what...

0:09:38 > 0:09:41- HE SCREAMS - I warned you.- Whoa!

0:09:41 > 0:09:44Mr B, you've been acting weird.

0:09:44 > 0:09:47Like you know there's something up with Christmas time at Strange Hill.

0:09:47 > 0:09:49You're normally the only one here.

0:09:49 > 0:09:52Something happens at Christmas, right? Hey, this hat works!

0:09:52 > 0:09:55It's the real Sherlock Holmes' actual hat.

0:09:55 > 0:09:59It has a brim on each end so no-one could tell which way he was going.

0:09:59 > 0:10:03- You ought to have seen his trousers. - Trousers schmousers, Baldy.

0:10:03 > 0:10:07- What do you know about Christmas and when did you know it?- Long story.

0:10:07 > 0:10:09Don't you children have something you'd rather do?

0:10:09 > 0:10:13I'm very longwinded and quite slow.

0:10:13 > 0:10:16No, Grandpa, we're here to see you.

0:10:16 > 0:10:20- No matter how annoying you are. - I'd love to hear a nice long story.

0:10:20 > 0:10:24- Uh, actually, could you give me... - It was hundreds of years ago.

0:10:24 > 0:10:28596 AD, as a matter of fact.

0:10:28 > 0:10:31HE GROANS Even exercise is looking good now.

0:10:31 > 0:10:33# Don't rest your lazy, flabby butts

0:10:33 > 0:10:35# But, please, we're in dismay

0:10:35 > 0:10:39# Remember it was Mitchell who put you here today

0:10:39 > 0:10:43# But he snuck off, so typical, it's us who have to pay

0:10:43 > 0:10:46# With squats and sit-ups and bends

0:10:46 > 0:10:47# Sit-ups and bends

0:10:47 > 0:10:51# With squats and sit-ups and bends. #

0:10:51 > 0:10:56And so you see, we weren't just classmates here at Strange Hill -

0:10:56 > 0:10:58we were the best of friends.

0:10:58 > 0:11:00Kris Kringle and you.

0:11:00 > 0:11:03But when he was selected to be Father Christmas over me,

0:11:03 > 0:11:05well, I became quite jealous.

0:11:05 > 0:11:08I'd be jealous if Templeton were the Easter Bunny.

0:11:08 > 0:11:11I'd still give you eggs, but things would never be the same.

0:11:11 > 0:11:14And that's why come Christmas time, I'd rather be alone

0:11:14 > 0:11:16than inflict my bitterness on anyone.

0:11:16 > 0:11:21- Could you inflict some more biscuits on us, though?- Oh, yes. Of course.

0:11:21 > 0:11:23HE YAWNS

0:11:23 > 0:11:26All this reminiscing has tuckered me out.

0:11:26 > 0:11:29Now, you run along! I think I'll have a nice nap.

0:11:29 > 0:11:31HE SNORES

0:11:39 > 0:11:41DOOR CLOSES

0:11:42 > 0:11:46They fell for it! Me of all people telling a lie.

0:11:46 > 0:11:48I must say, it was a little thrilling.

0:11:48 > 0:11:50BELLS JINGLING

0:11:50 > 0:11:53MUSIC: "Jingle Bells"

0:12:01 > 0:12:03SHIVERING

0:12:05 > 0:12:10Can't sleep. Can't stop thinking how Tanner's responsible for this.

0:12:10 > 0:12:13Some nice warm milk - that will help me get back to bed

0:12:13 > 0:12:15and take my mind off Mitchell.

0:12:18 > 0:12:21HE SCREAMS Good evening, Mr Abercrombie.

0:12:21 > 0:12:23What'll it be, sir?

0:12:23 > 0:12:26Oh, no, no. Nothing. Thank you...Tanner.

0:12:28 > 0:12:31A brisk walk will clear my mind.

0:12:31 > 0:12:32SINISTER MUSIC

0:12:32 > 0:12:35- HE SCREAMS - Have you seen Mitchell?

0:12:35 > 0:12:37He's going to play with us. Fun.

0:12:37 > 0:12:41- You can play too. More fun. - HE SCREAMS

0:12:46 > 0:12:50A classroom - the one place Tanner would never go.

0:12:50 > 0:12:53DOOR CREAKING So this is a classroom. Cool.

0:12:53 > 0:12:54HE SCREAMS

0:12:57 > 0:12:58WHEELS WHOOSH

0:12:58 > 0:13:00HE SCREAMS

0:13:02 > 0:13:05Oh. Uh... Where'd you go?

0:13:05 > 0:13:08I couldn't sleep, so I went to the kitchen to get something to eat.

0:13:08 > 0:13:10Then I tried to find the twins to play with them.

0:13:10 > 0:13:12Then I stood in a classroom and I rode my skateboard around.

0:13:12 > 0:13:14Then I came back here.

0:13:14 > 0:13:17- ABERCROMBIE SCREAMS - What's up with him?- I don't know.

0:13:20 > 0:13:23- I think Abercrombie is frozen too. - I'm fine!

0:13:23 > 0:13:27Just a little stir-crazy from being stuck in the Tanner for two Tanner.

0:13:27 > 0:13:28Now, Tanner along.

0:13:28 > 0:13:33I know, like, I'm always saying this, but this place is grim.

0:13:33 > 0:13:35It just needs some holiday cheer.

0:13:35 > 0:13:38Cook, can you prepare a yummy traditional Christmas meal?

0:13:38 > 0:13:42Well, I understood traditional and Christmas.

0:13:42 > 0:13:47Now, Christmas demands decorations. Let's find some!

0:13:47 > 0:13:51- There's not a single cheerful thing in this school.- Hello, friends!

0:13:51 > 0:13:54- I mean that we can hang on a wall. - Hello again!

0:13:56 > 0:14:01- HE LAUGHS - Good luck finding decorations!

0:14:01 > 0:14:03HE SIGHS

0:14:03 > 0:14:05It'll take forever to find any decorations in here.

0:14:05 > 0:14:10Can't we just make do with some birthday balloons

0:14:10 > 0:14:12and a weird picture of some freaky kids?

0:14:12 > 0:14:14That's Mr Balding's class portrait.

0:14:14 > 0:14:16I don't see anyone who looks like Santa Claus.

0:14:16 > 0:14:18Santa must have looked different then.

0:14:18 > 0:14:21As a boy, his beard definitely wouldn't have been white. Whoa!

0:14:21 > 0:14:26Decorations! It's like someone didn't want us to find them.

0:14:26 > 0:14:30- But it says, "Do not display." So we should display 'em, right?- Oh, yeah.

0:14:30 > 0:14:33I'm sure that's because they're so wonderful and cheery,

0:14:33 > 0:14:36and in Victorian times, they liked things grim and frowny.

0:14:36 > 0:14:40Like this guy. "King Henry's Christmassy Crackers."

0:14:40 > 0:14:44- "Off with your hands!" Awesome. - Mitchell, be careful!

0:14:44 > 0:14:47Those are really old, unstable and likely to blow at any minute.

0:14:47 > 0:14:50Like Abercrombie. BANG!

0:14:50 > 0:14:52Cool! These are coming too.

0:14:54 > 0:14:58Stopping messing around and help me carry these dangerous explosives.

0:14:58 > 0:15:02- Eh?- Whatever you do, Temps, don't drop any.

0:15:04 > 0:15:06- BANG! - Ouch.

0:15:06 > 0:15:07- BANG! - Ouch.

0:15:07 > 0:15:08- BANG! - Ouch!

0:15:13 > 0:15:16"Merry Christmas from Victoria."

0:15:16 > 0:15:20Nice greeting from the Beckhams, but, boy, she's gotten fat.

0:15:20 > 0:15:24Oh! Oh, nothing like a nap to calm you down

0:15:24 > 0:15:26and make you feel everything is OK.

0:15:28 > 0:15:31Oh. This is not all OK. I...

0:15:31 > 0:15:33- Oh! No! - RIP!

0:15:33 > 0:15:36- No!- Oh!- No! - HE GROANS

0:15:38 > 0:15:43- Now teachers is vandalising. - We're living in crazy times, Bishop.

0:15:43 > 0:15:45How's the holiday meal?

0:15:45 > 0:15:49Uh, it's been quite challenging trying to cook without any heat.

0:15:49 > 0:15:53But I've managed to whip up a few traditional dishes -

0:15:53 > 0:15:58iced turkey with frozen gravy squares and pigs in down blankets.

0:15:58 > 0:16:03- Oh, and parsnicles.- I know how to make these more Christmassy - sugar.

0:16:03 > 0:16:06Coats and coats of sparkly sugar!

0:16:06 > 0:16:08Sugar and...ice sculptures!

0:16:08 > 0:16:12- SHE GASPS - Kids, I like your bad thinking.

0:16:12 > 0:16:14CRACKLING

0:16:15 > 0:16:18We may have no heat, but tonight,

0:16:18 > 0:16:22we've prepared a special Christmas dinner to warm our hearts.

0:16:22 > 0:16:26So no complaining and no spitting your food out. Enjoy.

0:16:26 > 0:16:28CHILDREN EXCLAIM

0:16:32 > 0:16:36- Now you've done it!- Mr B! It's one thing to be a cranky old Scrooge,

0:16:36 > 0:16:39but to ruin it for everyone is quite selfish.

0:16:39 > 0:16:41SINISTER CACKLING

0:16:43 > 0:16:46- Hey...the food's gone. - ALL GASP

0:16:46 > 0:16:47Elves!

0:16:47 > 0:16:52Your Christmas treats and relentless good spirits have attracted elves!

0:16:52 > 0:16:53And now we're done for!

0:16:53 > 0:16:57CACKLING

0:17:00 > 0:17:03But I thought elves were Santa's helpers. They make the gifts.

0:17:03 > 0:17:08They make off with the gifts, and destroy and eat everything else.

0:17:08 > 0:17:11But all those legends filling my impressionable young head!

0:17:11 > 0:17:15The truth gets twisted over the years and becomes legend.

0:17:15 > 0:17:18Santa and I had to fight them off every year

0:17:18 > 0:17:21until we finally contained them with the help of Wolfman.

0:17:21 > 0:17:23The Wolfman is real?

0:17:23 > 0:17:26- Jonathan is very real, yes. - CACKLING

0:17:29 > 0:17:31The elves have been locked away for so long,

0:17:31 > 0:17:33and with them released so close to Christmas,

0:17:33 > 0:17:36I'm afraid there won't be much of a holiday for anyone this year.

0:17:36 > 0:17:39CACKLING

0:17:44 > 0:17:48I'll never be able to get out of the school tonight!

0:17:48 > 0:17:49ALARM BLARES

0:17:49 > 0:17:53Yes, Rudodolph, we're in quite a fix.

0:17:54 > 0:17:56Oh!

0:17:56 > 0:17:59"Dear Santa - for Christmas this year,

0:17:59 > 0:18:02"I want a doll that claps her hands and drives a truck."

0:18:02 > 0:18:08I'm sorry, Molly. Looks like no-one will be getting presents this year.

0:18:08 > 0:18:09Oh, oh, oh...

0:18:10 > 0:18:13- CACKLING - Hey, stop eating my food.

0:18:13 > 0:18:15You're ruining my reputation.

0:18:15 > 0:18:16HE SCREAMS

0:18:16 > 0:18:17ELF CACKLES

0:18:17 > 0:18:19SCREAMING

0:18:22 > 0:18:24- CACKLING - Where'd they go?

0:18:25 > 0:18:27HE GASPS

0:18:27 > 0:18:29CACKLING

0:18:29 > 0:18:33- Oh!- Look out! Right behind me!

0:18:33 > 0:18:36HE GROANS

0:18:37 > 0:18:39CACKLING

0:18:39 > 0:18:41Mitchell, we've got to help him.

0:18:41 > 0:18:45- They seem to take particular pleasure in tormenting him.- Hold up.

0:18:45 > 0:18:47They might be allies. Friends.

0:18:47 > 0:18:50Hello! A cheery...

0:18:50 > 0:18:53- I could be wrong about that friendship part.- Tanner!

0:18:53 > 0:18:56- Did you just rescue me? - Uh...I guess I did.

0:18:56 > 0:18:58- You won't tell anyone, will you? - What do you want?

0:18:58 > 0:19:00- HIGH VOICE - Good cheer.

0:19:00 > 0:19:02Oh! So do I!

0:19:02 > 0:19:04To eat!

0:19:04 > 0:19:08You really don't want to eat us. We're full of sour pre-teen angst.

0:19:08 > 0:19:12- You brought cold to the school. You brought us.- Great.

0:19:12 > 0:19:15- Now I'm being blamed by elves.- You will help us escape into the world.

0:19:15 > 0:19:18Earth is full of good cheer this time of year.

0:19:18 > 0:19:19And if I don't help you?

0:19:19 > 0:19:22- SINISTER VOICE - You will perish.- Whoa!

0:19:22 > 0:19:25- I thought all elves have high, funny voices.- It's a regional thing.

0:19:25 > 0:19:28We all talk like this in Lollipopland.

0:19:28 > 0:19:31- Now, help us, or... - J. R. R. Tolkien, forgive me!

0:19:33 > 0:19:37- An improper use of lollipops. - Run, children, run!

0:19:37 > 0:19:40ALL SCREAM

0:19:40 > 0:19:44- Abs, did you just rescue me? - You won't tell anyone, will you?

0:19:44 > 0:19:47Two elves together are cute, three adorable,

0:19:47 > 0:19:49but hundreds in a thriving mass?

0:19:49 > 0:19:50SCREAMING

0:19:52 > 0:19:55ELVES HISSING

0:19:55 > 0:19:58I always knew it would end for me like this.

0:19:58 > 0:19:59HISSING

0:19:59 > 0:20:03I guess we should exchange gifts and Christmas greetings now!

0:20:03 > 0:20:06I don't have anything to give! Except...

0:20:06 > 0:20:08BANG!

0:20:08 > 0:20:10HISSING

0:20:10 > 0:20:13They don't like heat. Have you got any more?

0:20:13 > 0:20:15BANG, BANG! HISSING

0:20:17 > 0:20:21CRACKERS CONTINUE BANGING, ELVES CONTINUE HISSING

0:20:23 > 0:20:25Toss more crackers this way!

0:20:25 > 0:20:28At the furnace! We need more kindling.

0:20:28 > 0:20:30- How about this sack of letters?- Wait!

0:20:30 > 0:20:35Those are from children around the world. I haven't read all the...

0:20:36 > 0:20:41Oh, well. What's a few hundred thousand disappointed kids?

0:20:43 > 0:20:46HISSING

0:20:46 > 0:20:47RATTLING

0:20:49 > 0:20:53Go on! Back to Lollipopland!

0:20:53 > 0:20:57I'm from Dingle Dell, actually. But so long, sucker!

0:20:59 > 0:21:01HISSING

0:21:03 > 0:21:06- TWINS:- Ooh. - HE LAUGHS

0:21:06 > 0:21:08THEY LAUGH

0:21:08 > 0:21:10- HE LAUGHS - Like, really.

0:21:12 > 0:21:16- BELLS JINGLING - Ho, ho, ho!

0:21:17 > 0:21:22- Well, uh...Tanner, I guess I'll see you after the new year.- Yeah.

0:21:22 > 0:21:28- I...I guess.- Um...if ever there was a time to say this...Merry Christmas.

0:21:30 > 0:21:35- Wait. What about Mr Balding?- Eh. I'm sure he has stuff to do.

0:21:35 > 0:21:39On, Rudodolph. Ho, ho! On!

0:21:39 > 0:21:42This isn't the number 86 bus to Chorlton.

0:21:42 > 0:21:45Ho, ho, ho!

0:21:46 > 0:21:47# I'mma have to yell this

0:21:47 > 0:21:49# If you can help it

0:21:49 > 0:21:50# Don't, d-don't

0:21:50 > 0:21:51# Don't be elfish!

0:21:51 > 0:21:53# I'mma have to yell this

0:21:53 > 0:21:54# If you can help it

0:21:54 > 0:21:57# Don't ruin your Christmas with this if you can help it

0:21:57 > 0:21:59# Don't be elfish! #