0:00:42 > 0:00:44Hello and welcome to The Dog Ate My Homework -
0:00:44 > 0:00:46CBBC's best excuse for a panel show.
0:00:46 > 0:00:49I'm Iain Stirling and I'm here to make sure that fun
0:00:49 > 0:00:50is top of the timetable.
0:00:50 > 0:00:54So hang onto your blazers, here come the school announcements.
0:00:54 > 0:00:56We've had some great results in numeracy,
0:00:56 > 0:00:58where a pupil got a B and three As.
0:00:58 > 0:01:00Sorry, I mean a Baaa!
0:01:02 > 0:01:06Congratulations to the school's environmental project
0:01:06 > 0:01:08and their prototype unleaded vehicle.
0:01:11 > 0:01:14And a reminder that, before hanging up your school bag,
0:01:14 > 0:01:16it is advisable to take it off first.
0:01:20 > 0:01:23Right, let's see who's who and what's what,
0:01:23 > 0:01:25as I call today's register.
0:01:25 > 0:01:27- On my left, we have Sonia.- Here!
0:01:27 > 0:01:31- And on Sonia's team, it's Susan Calman.- Here, Mr Stirling.
0:01:31 > 0:01:35Also, from CBBC's Blue Peter, it's only bloomin' Radzi!
0:01:35 > 0:01:37Mr S, in the house.
0:01:37 > 0:01:41Squelch those into one name ball, and what you get is...
0:01:41 > 0:01:43Sonsadzi!
0:01:44 > 0:01:47- Disturbing.- Scary.- That's quite odd.
0:01:47 > 0:01:51That's what Radzi looked like after he heard he got the Blue Peter job.
0:01:51 > 0:01:53I had a perm like that in the '80s.
0:01:53 > 0:01:55Radzi's got a perm like that now.
0:01:56 > 0:02:00- So, on my right-hand side, we have Harley.- Here, Mrs Stirling!
0:02:00 > 0:02:03- Mister.- Sorry.
0:02:03 > 0:02:05And on Harley's team,
0:02:05 > 0:02:08we have our very own daredevil. It's Dan Antopolski.
0:02:08 > 0:02:09Present!
0:02:09 > 0:02:13And also on her team, we have the very funny Chris Martin.
0:02:13 > 0:02:14Oh, thanks, Mr Stirling.
0:02:14 > 0:02:15You're welcome, mate.
0:02:15 > 0:02:19Put them all together and what you get is...Hardacanchris.
0:02:19 > 0:02:21Oh, wow.
0:02:21 > 0:02:23Oh!
0:02:23 > 0:02:25Look at that!
0:02:25 > 0:02:28I paid money to see something like that an the circus the other day.
0:02:28 > 0:02:29It looks like Wagbo!
0:02:29 > 0:02:31It does look like Wagbo.
0:02:31 > 0:02:35OK, well there's our teams, so everybody please make some noise!
0:02:35 > 0:02:38CHEERING
0:02:40 > 0:02:42Right, now, let's get it straight.
0:02:42 > 0:02:44How do we do things round here?
0:02:44 > 0:02:46Basically, every time you win a round,
0:02:46 > 0:02:48you get to hand in some of this homework.
0:02:48 > 0:02:50That means, if you want to be top of your form,
0:02:50 > 0:02:52you have to hand in as much homework as you possibly can
0:02:52 > 0:02:54by the end of the show.
0:02:54 > 0:02:57But the l-l-losers that hand in the least
0:02:57 > 0:03:00get detention with our very own PE teacher -
0:03:00 > 0:03:02a man that can sneeze a gran clear off her feet.
0:03:02 > 0:03:03It's Mr Smash!
0:03:03 > 0:03:06Argh!
0:03:06 > 0:03:08You all right, Mr Smash?
0:03:08 > 0:03:12What are you trying to do? Oh, deflate a basketball?
0:03:12 > 0:03:14Not going very well, is it?
0:03:14 > 0:03:16You're not going to get any air out of that, I'm afraid.
0:03:16 > 0:03:18No chance.
0:03:18 > 0:03:20LOUD SQUEAKING NOISE
0:03:20 > 0:03:21Oh, there it goes!
0:03:25 > 0:03:28Mr Smash, the basketball hasn't gone down at all.
0:03:31 > 0:03:32Ooh!
0:03:35 > 0:03:37And remember, as far as the points go,
0:03:37 > 0:03:39it's Iain's School, so it's...
0:03:39 > 0:03:41AUDIENCE: Iain's Rules!
0:03:41 > 0:03:44All right, let's crack open a window and get on with the show!
0:03:50 > 0:03:54OK, now it's time for Shed Loads. It's a sort of verbal tennis round.
0:03:54 > 0:03:56I fire questions at you guys
0:03:56 > 0:03:59and you bat back "shed loads" of funny answers.
0:03:59 > 0:04:03When I think we've squeezed the last laugh out of each question,
0:04:03 > 0:04:05I'll throw another question into the mix.
0:04:05 > 0:04:07Okey-dokey, let's crack on with the game.
0:04:07 > 0:04:10Sonia's team, we'll start with you.
0:04:10 > 0:04:11Your first subject is maths.
0:04:11 > 0:04:14Name...
0:04:14 > 0:04:16- Inches.- Yep.
0:04:16 > 0:04:17- Hands.- Yes.
0:04:17 > 0:04:18- Feet.- Yes.
0:04:18 > 0:04:21Round-the-worlds.
0:04:21 > 0:04:23- Yes.- A dash.- Yes.
0:04:23 > 0:04:26- A pinch...- Yep.- ..of salt.
0:04:26 > 0:04:28Football pitches.
0:04:28 > 0:04:30What do you measure in football pitches?
0:04:30 > 0:04:33When they go, "It's so big, it's like seven football pitches."
0:04:33 > 0:04:35Blue Peter always do that!
0:04:35 > 0:04:37They can never compare things the normal...
0:04:37 > 0:04:40"This whale is the size of 19 cups of tea!"
0:04:42 > 0:04:45- Next.- Fish. This big. - 2 points for that.
0:04:45 > 0:04:49A cup. American recipes often have a cup of flour.
0:04:49 > 0:04:51- A teaspoon.- A teaspoon.
0:04:51 > 0:04:53- Any more?- Tablespoon.
0:04:53 > 0:04:54A spoon!
0:04:54 > 0:04:58# A spoonful of sugar helps the medicine go down!
0:04:58 > 0:05:01# The medicine go down! #
0:05:02 > 0:05:04Oh. Someone's been to acting school.
0:05:04 > 0:05:07Let's move on. School stuff now.
0:05:07 > 0:05:09Name a load of...
0:05:09 > 0:05:11- Drama club.- OK.
0:05:11 > 0:05:12- Breakfast club.- Yep.
0:05:12 > 0:05:14- I was a member of the disco club. - Yes.
0:05:14 > 0:05:17- The chicken club.- What?
0:05:17 > 0:05:19You have chickens.
0:05:19 > 0:05:23And you get their eggs and you get to take them home.
0:05:23 > 0:05:26That's not a chicken club. You're thinking of a farm.
0:05:26 > 0:05:27No!
0:05:27 > 0:05:29- It's called the chicken club.- OK...
0:05:29 > 0:05:31- S.- S?- S Club.
0:05:31 > 0:05:34- There ain't no party... - S Club 7!- ..like an S Club party!
0:05:35 > 0:05:36Yes...
0:05:36 > 0:05:40The egg club. We were like a spin-off to the chicken club.
0:05:41 > 0:05:43We were slightly less popular.
0:05:43 > 0:05:45- What about you, Dan? - I was in the fox club.
0:05:45 > 0:05:47We were next door to both of them.
0:05:52 > 0:05:54Final one, just for fun.
0:05:54 > 0:05:57A shed load of...
0:05:57 > 0:05:58- Harley's team.- Gerty!
0:05:58 > 0:05:59Brilliant.
0:05:59 > 0:06:01- Hacker.- Hacker, yes!
0:06:01 > 0:06:05- Dodge.- Yes, just name people more popular than me on the channel.
0:06:05 > 0:06:08- Thank you very much.- Wellard. - Wellard, yes!
0:06:08 > 0:06:10- Pudsey!- Yes!
0:06:10 > 0:06:11- Fluffy!- Yep.
0:06:11 > 0:06:12- Hot.- Hot?
0:06:12 > 0:06:15- Hot dog.- That's amazing.
0:06:15 > 0:06:17- Next.- Ricksy-ticksy.
0:06:17 > 0:06:18I like that one.
0:06:18 > 0:06:21- Clive.- Yes!
0:06:21 > 0:06:23Human names for dogs is always good, isn't it?
0:06:23 > 0:06:27- Yeah...- You'd look really weird in a park just going, "Clive! Clive!"
0:06:27 > 0:06:29And you think an old man's going to turn up
0:06:29 > 0:06:31and a tiny little dog turns up.
0:06:31 > 0:06:33Sometimes an old man will just go, "What?"
0:06:33 > 0:06:35Yeah, you get a free old man with your dog.
0:06:35 > 0:06:36- Chris.- Yes!- Oh!
0:06:36 > 0:06:38- Charlie!- Charlie?
0:06:38 > 0:06:40- BELL RINGS - Oh, time up!
0:06:43 > 0:06:45Well done, everyone.
0:06:45 > 0:06:48I think, because of chicken club, egg club and fox club,
0:06:48 > 0:06:50I'm giving to have to give it to Harley's team.
0:06:50 > 0:06:52Harley, please hand in your homework!
0:06:58 > 0:06:59Next up is the round...
0:06:59 > 0:07:00KNOCKS ON DOOR
0:07:00 > 0:07:03- Who is it?- It's Eddie from Class 4B.
0:07:03 > 0:07:05In you come, Eddie from Class 4B.
0:07:06 > 0:07:09- All right, Iain?- All right, Eddie? That's a nice little get up, mate.
0:07:09 > 0:07:12- Is this for a science project?- No.
0:07:12 > 0:07:16- Environmental studies?- No.
0:07:16 > 0:07:20- What is it, then? - It's my rugby kit. I'm a fly-half.
0:07:21 > 0:07:25- It's the back half, obviously. - Obviously. What have you got for me?
0:07:25 > 0:07:26I've got this for you, Iain.
0:07:26 > 0:07:29Thanks, mate. Give it up for Eddie, everybody!
0:07:29 > 0:07:31CHEERING
0:07:33 > 0:07:34Oh...
0:07:34 > 0:07:38it's lost property. Has someone lost a lunchbox?
0:07:38 > 0:07:41- Iain, sorry, I think that's probably mine.- Yes?
0:07:41 > 0:07:44- What's in it and we'll see...? - Um, is there any chocolate in it?
0:07:44 > 0:07:47- Cos I had some chocolate in it. - Chocolate?
0:07:47 > 0:07:49I can't see any chocolate.
0:07:49 > 0:07:51I can't see...any!
0:07:51 > 0:07:56I had some cheesy crisps in there? Is there any cheesy crisps?
0:07:56 > 0:07:58Um...there's no cheesy crisps...
0:07:58 > 0:08:00No...crisps!
0:08:01 > 0:08:05Oh, and I had a muffin as well. Is there a muffin in it?
0:08:05 > 0:08:07There's no muffin, Susan!
0:08:07 > 0:08:09Can't see a muffin!
0:08:09 > 0:08:12Sorry, it looked like mine, but it can't be. Sorry about that.
0:08:12 > 0:08:15Don't worry about it, Susan. Let's get on with the next round.
0:08:19 > 0:08:23It is time for everyone's favourite part of the show,
0:08:23 > 0:08:25it's Who Do You Think I Am?
0:08:25 > 0:08:27- Oh, no, Iain!- Iain!
0:08:27 > 0:08:29This is the round in which I blow your minds
0:08:29 > 0:08:33with my unbelievable portrayal of any character from history
0:08:33 > 0:08:34that you could possibly imagine.
0:08:34 > 0:08:37- Susan, name a character... - Charlemagne.
0:08:37 > 0:08:38- HIGH VOICE:- Oh, I'm Charlemagne!
0:08:38 > 0:08:39Queen Elizabeth I.
0:08:39 > 0:08:42- SILLY VOICE:- Oh, I'm royal!
0:08:43 > 0:08:46It's just some the acting you're going to see today.
0:08:46 > 0:08:50Here's my prop box. Now, watch in disbelief as I take on the mantle.
0:08:50 > 0:08:52Here we go!
0:08:58 > 0:09:00OK, Harley's team. You're up first.
0:09:00 > 0:09:02Iain, are you just going to do the Italian accent
0:09:02 > 0:09:04you always do again or...?
0:09:04 > 0:09:08I have got a wide range of accents, and I've got these wonderful props.
0:09:08 > 0:09:10Is your famous person a hair stylist?
0:09:10 > 0:09:11No!
0:09:11 > 0:09:13Are you Harry Many-Hair-Styles.
0:09:13 > 0:09:16Oh, hello! I'm not anyone from One Direction. Here we go.
0:09:16 > 0:09:20- Why are you skiing now? - It's part of the costume, mate!
0:09:20 > 0:09:23Maybe if you let me do some acting, it'd make some sense, yeah?!
0:09:23 > 0:09:27- But there's no snow! - I've got sticks!
0:09:27 > 0:09:29Stop laughing!
0:09:30 > 0:09:32Iain, have you started?
0:09:32 > 0:09:35I've not started, cos no-one will shut up for five seconds!
0:09:35 > 0:09:38Iain, are you an aggressive Nicki Minaj?
0:09:38 > 0:09:41Nicki Minaj?! I'm skiing!
0:09:41 > 0:09:43- You're Adele!- No!
0:09:45 > 0:09:47First clue.
0:09:47 > 0:09:52- HEAVY GERMAN-STYLE ACCENT: - I am an Austrian princess,
0:09:52 > 0:09:58but you probably know me as a French queen!
0:09:58 > 0:10:00I'm an Austrian lady.
0:10:00 > 0:10:02What?! Why...?!
0:10:02 > 0:10:06You're acting out skiing, but you sound like you're on the toilet.
0:10:06 > 0:10:10What can I say, I've got a pretty messed up diet!
0:10:11 > 0:10:14- Can you understand him? - You're on your last warning.
0:10:14 > 0:10:17Actually, so are you lot. This is my show!
0:10:17 > 0:10:20I've said to you, it's serious!
0:10:20 > 0:10:23- AUDIENCE: Aww!- Don't patronise me!
0:10:24 > 0:10:27- It's not pantomime.- Oh, yes, it is! - I'm better than pantomime.
0:10:27 > 0:10:29Oh, no, you're not!
0:10:29 > 0:10:31Oh, don't start on me, Dan.
0:10:31 > 0:10:33Right, clue number two.
0:10:33 > 0:10:36- LANCASHIRE ACCENT: - Although I wasn't a baldy,
0:10:36 > 0:10:39I loved to wear giant wigs. I am literally Northern now.
0:10:41 > 0:10:45I'm well known for my extravagant style
0:10:45 > 0:10:48- at me gaff in Versailles! - What's a gaff?
0:10:48 > 0:10:50With those wigs on the floor,
0:10:50 > 0:10:53you look like you're trying to spear some rodents.
0:10:53 > 0:10:54Oh, it's a mouse!
0:10:55 > 0:10:58- Was it Versailles or Ver-SAY? - It's Versailles.
0:10:58 > 0:11:00Either way, not that voice.
0:11:00 > 0:11:03- NORTHERN ACCENT:- Versailles.
0:11:03 > 0:11:05OK, final clue!
0:11:05 > 0:11:09Some people think I advise my subjects to eat cake,
0:11:09 > 0:11:11a bit like Mary Berry done,
0:11:11 > 0:11:14and eventually the people became revolting on me
0:11:14 > 0:11:17and chopped off my head with a guillotine.
0:11:17 > 0:11:19Have some cake!
0:11:19 > 0:11:21Who am I?
0:11:21 > 0:11:24Is it Marie Antoinette?
0:11:24 > 0:11:26Correct! I'm Marie Antoinette!
0:11:28 > 0:11:30The extravagant fashion-lover
0:11:30 > 0:11:34and queen consort of King Louis XVI of France.
0:11:34 > 0:11:36- You guys are up next. - Are you a ghost?
0:11:36 > 0:11:38No, I'm not a ghost.
0:11:38 > 0:11:39Are you a ghost hunter?
0:11:39 > 0:11:42A ghost hunter? Oh, yes, they hide under a sheet and go,
0:11:42 > 0:11:43"Oh, where are you?!"
0:11:43 > 0:11:45"I'm one of you."
0:11:45 > 0:11:48- Are you Simon Cowell? - What are you talking about?!
0:11:48 > 0:11:50I've got an ice cream!
0:11:50 > 0:11:52Are you saying Simon Cowell doesn't enjoy an ice cream?
0:11:52 > 0:11:55Yes, I am saying that. Here I go. Clue number one.
0:11:55 > 0:11:59- HEAVY ITALIAN ACCENT: - I...am an Italian man.- Yay!
0:11:59 > 0:12:04- Are you the guy who made Gelato? - I don't even know what that is!
0:12:04 > 0:12:08- I think it's this Italian ice cream thing.- Ice cream.- Clue number two.
0:12:09 > 0:12:12- LANCASHIRE ACCENT: - I was a general in the army.
0:12:12 > 0:12:15- You're Northern again. - Sorry!- Russell Crowe.
0:12:15 > 0:12:19If you're a general, why can you only afford a sheet as your outfit?
0:12:19 > 0:12:20It's in the wash.
0:12:21 > 0:12:24- ITALIAN ACCENT: - I was a general in the army
0:12:24 > 0:12:27and I conquered a chunk of the Europa called Gaul.
0:12:27 > 0:12:31- A place... - Is that Gaul? I've conquered it.
0:12:32 > 0:12:35- You've conquered it? - Who am I?- Are you Jason Derulo?
0:12:36 > 0:12:38- SILLY VOICE:- Jason Derulo.
0:12:38 > 0:12:40# Jason De-loo-roll! #
0:12:40 > 0:12:42Jason the loo roll?
0:12:42 > 0:12:44I can't say it.
0:12:44 > 0:12:45I can't say his last name,
0:12:45 > 0:12:49so I always say Jason De-loo-roll because it's easier.
0:12:49 > 0:12:51If you say that three times in the mirror, he appears behind you.
0:12:54 > 0:12:58I was a dictator. I wore leaves on my head.
0:12:58 > 0:13:03I've got a month named after me and I'm also a type of salad.
0:13:03 > 0:13:06Not green leaf. He-he-he!
0:13:06 > 0:13:08- Oh, I get it now. - Who am I?
0:13:08 > 0:13:13I've conquered Gaul, I've got my own salad and I like ice cream!
0:13:13 > 0:13:15- I think we know who it is, Iain. - Who am I?
0:13:15 > 0:13:17It was because of your accent.
0:13:17 > 0:13:22- Are you Torvill and Dean? - Torvill and Dean? I'm one person!
0:13:22 > 0:13:23Are you Torvill?
0:13:25 > 0:13:26Sonia? Go for it.
0:13:26 > 0:13:28Is it Julius Caesar?
0:13:28 > 0:13:30I am Julius Caesar!
0:13:32 > 0:13:36Yes, the very well travelled Roman dictator who met a very grizzly end.
0:13:38 > 0:13:40I can reveal that, because of my phenomenal acting,
0:13:40 > 0:13:43both of you got the correct answer, so, Harley and Sonia's team,
0:13:43 > 0:13:46you can both hand in your homework!
0:13:51 > 0:13:54OK, it's that point in the show where we check in with
0:13:54 > 0:13:56Smash about the score.
0:13:56 > 0:13:58So, Smashy, how many bits of homework
0:13:58 > 0:14:00have Harley's team handed in?
0:14:00 > 0:14:03Grr!
0:14:03 > 0:14:06OK, and what about Sonia's team?
0:14:06 > 0:14:10Grr!
0:14:10 > 0:14:11Well, there it is, Sonia.
0:14:11 > 0:14:13Time to get these two back on track, because otherwise,
0:14:13 > 0:14:17it's detention with Mr Smash, and he looks like he's up for a fight.
0:14:18 > 0:14:21Oh, I don't think the other guy is very impressed, though, Smashy.
0:14:21 > 0:14:23Let's do this!
0:14:23 > 0:14:25MUSIC: "It's Like That" by Run DMC
0:14:27 > 0:14:30A gym teacher and a dancing dog are having a dance off!
0:14:31 > 0:14:33Oh, running man.
0:14:33 > 0:14:35- Whoo!- Whoo!- Whoo!
0:14:40 > 0:14:42Whoo!
0:14:47 > 0:14:49Don't even know what that is.
0:14:50 > 0:14:52Oh!
0:14:55 > 0:14:56Aw, they're friendly, really.
0:14:56 > 0:14:58They just both want their tummies tickled.
0:14:58 > 0:15:01Anyway, let's get on with the next round.
0:15:07 > 0:15:09The next round is called "Pop Or Poetry?",
0:15:09 > 0:15:12where words have the power to move you.
0:15:12 > 0:15:15I'm going to give you a few lines from either a pop song or a poem.
0:15:15 > 0:15:19What I want you guys to do is tell me who is famous for those lines.
0:15:19 > 0:15:21So, Sonia's team, here we go.
0:15:21 > 0:15:23"You've got the words to change a nation,
0:15:23 > 0:15:25"but you're biting your tongue.
0:15:25 > 0:15:28"You spent a lifetime stuck in silence."
0:15:28 > 0:15:31But who said that? Is it electric-shock-haired singer
0:15:31 > 0:15:36Emeli Sande, mustachioed Jungle Book author Rudyard Kipling,
0:15:36 > 0:15:39or was it cross-eyed crooner Jessie J?
0:15:39 > 0:15:42- I recognise it. - You're lucky, Iain.- Really?
0:15:42 > 0:15:46- Cos in my spare time, I'm a Jessie J lookalike.- Are you?
0:15:46 > 0:15:48I can rap like her, I can sing and rap like her.
0:15:48 > 0:15:50Oh, OK, let's see it, then.
0:15:50 > 0:15:54- Reckon you could do this like Jessie J?- Yeah, I can do it like Jessie J.
0:15:54 > 0:15:55All right, OK. Let's have a little listen.
0:15:55 > 0:15:58- SHE RAPS:- # You've got the words to change a nation
0:15:58 > 0:16:01# But you're biting your tongue You spend a lifetime in silence
0:16:01 > 0:16:05- HIGH-PITCHED AND OUT OF TUNE: - # Oh-oh-oooooh
0:16:05 > 0:16:07# Ooh. #
0:16:08 > 0:16:10LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE
0:16:10 > 0:16:15- There's about 30 angry dogs outside, confused.- I get a little work.
0:16:15 > 0:16:18I think it might be one of the singers.
0:16:18 > 0:16:20Why? Why not Rudyard? What have you got against Rudyard Kipling?
0:16:20 > 0:16:24- It sounds more like a song. - What have you got against Rudyard?!
0:16:24 > 0:16:26Nothing. It just sounds more like a song.
0:16:26 > 0:16:29I know someone that might convince you of Rudyard Kipling, Sonia.
0:16:29 > 0:16:31We've got a little poet in the house.
0:16:31 > 0:16:33Radzi, have you done a little poem?
0:16:33 > 0:16:35I have. It's actually something I scribbled together...
0:16:35 > 0:16:37There's one he made earlier.
0:16:37 > 0:16:39There he goes, on brand.
0:16:39 > 0:16:40First thing about this show
0:16:40 > 0:16:42This you might not know
0:16:42 > 0:16:43It's filmed up here in Scotland
0:16:43 > 0:16:44The city of Glasgow
0:16:44 > 0:16:46Specifically, Pacific Quay
0:16:46 > 0:16:48To be precise
0:16:48 > 0:16:50There's a huge crew behind the camera
0:16:50 > 0:16:51And they're all real nice
0:16:51 > 0:16:53Someone who isn't, by the way
0:16:53 > 0:16:55And I'm a little wary
0:16:55 > 0:16:56Is the geezer over there, Mr Smash
0:16:56 > 0:16:58And I think he's a little scary...
0:16:58 > 0:17:00MR SMASH GROWLS
0:17:00 > 0:17:03This is my responsibility that I will not shirk
0:17:03 > 0:17:06Greatest panel show on the Earth
0:17:06 > 0:17:07Dog Ate My Homework.
0:17:07 > 0:17:08CHEERING
0:17:12 > 0:17:14If I'm being honest, a bit long.
0:17:14 > 0:17:16LAUGHTER
0:17:16 > 0:17:17That was wicked, man, well done.
0:17:17 > 0:17:19So has that convinced you that it could be poetry
0:17:19 > 0:17:21or do you still think it's going to be pop?
0:17:21 > 0:17:23It could be, but I think it's more of a singer.
0:17:23 > 0:17:26Who would you go for, Jessie J or Emeli Sande?
0:17:26 > 0:17:27Emeli Sande. I'm sure it's her.
0:17:27 > 0:17:33Well, I can tell you that it is in fact pop and it is by Emeli Sande.
0:17:33 > 0:17:34Well done, Sonia.
0:17:36 > 0:17:38It is from Read All About It Part Three.
0:17:38 > 0:17:41It should sound a little something like this.
0:17:41 > 0:17:43# You've got the words to change a nation
0:17:43 > 0:17:46# But you're biting your tongue
0:17:46 > 0:17:49# You've spent a lifetime stuck in silence
0:17:49 > 0:17:52# Afraid you'll say something wrong... #
0:17:52 > 0:17:55Next one is for Harley's team...
0:17:56 > 0:17:58School disco!
0:17:58 > 0:17:59School disco.
0:17:59 > 0:18:02MUSIC: "Moves Like Jagger" by Maroon 5 Ft Christina Aguilera
0:18:10 > 0:18:11MUSIC STOPS ABRUPTLY
0:18:14 > 0:18:16So, you guys, if you could just get your Pop Or Poetry out,
0:18:16 > 0:18:19I'm now going to read it out in my best voice. Here we go.
0:18:19 > 0:18:23"When we two parted In silence and tears
0:18:23 > 0:18:27"Half broken-hearted to sever for years."
0:18:27 > 0:18:28But who said that?
0:18:28 > 0:18:33Is it dad-dancing rapper Pitbull, fancy-pants poet Lord Byron,
0:18:33 > 0:18:36or those little minxes Little Mix?
0:18:36 > 0:18:38- Harley, you're a trendy young lady. - Yeah.
0:18:38 > 0:18:40So I'm guessing you're OK with Lord Byron.
0:18:40 > 0:18:41Yeah.
0:18:41 > 0:18:45What's your favourite thing that Lord Byron's done?
0:18:45 > 0:18:49I used to live in the same house as he did and I found his diary.
0:18:50 > 0:18:54He just had the most...loveliest song in.
0:18:54 > 0:18:55Harley should be a politician.
0:18:55 > 0:18:58She says things with such authority that you go, "Oh, right then.
0:18:58 > 0:19:00"That sounds about right. That's great."
0:19:00 > 0:19:03You know, I can make anything interesting.
0:19:04 > 0:19:05Make this pen interesting now.
0:19:05 > 0:19:07- This pen. DAN:- Lord Byro.
0:19:07 > 0:19:08LAUGHTER
0:19:13 > 0:19:16Little Mix. Can you imagine Little Mix saying,
0:19:16 > 0:19:17"In silence and tears,
0:19:17 > 0:19:21"half broken-hearted to sever for years"?
0:19:21 > 0:19:22- No.- Why not?
0:19:22 > 0:19:26Because the way that I think they would sing it is not
0:19:26 > 0:19:28really for them.
0:19:28 > 0:19:29SONIA: Can we hear you sing it?
0:19:29 > 0:19:32I can't sing, but I can do a little bit of rapping.
0:19:32 > 0:19:34Oh, mate. Can you do a rap?
0:19:34 > 0:19:35Let's have a rap.
0:19:35 > 0:19:37I wrote a little rap about you, Iain.
0:19:37 > 0:19:39Oh, go on, then, mate. Yeah.
0:19:39 > 0:19:41- HE RAPS:- # My name's Iain
0:19:41 > 0:19:43# My hair's long and it's not curly
0:19:43 > 0:19:47# Cos it's so rubbish it scares all the girlies
0:19:47 > 0:19:50# This morning at breakfast I put too many beans in my belly
0:19:50 > 0:19:53# Which now means my pants are terrible and smelly. #
0:19:53 > 0:19:55LAUGHTER
0:19:59 > 0:20:02You can get a bonus point for factually correct.
0:20:02 > 0:20:04OK, so I'm going to have to push you for an answer.
0:20:04 > 0:20:06- Is it pop or is it poetry?- I think it's going to be...
0:20:06 > 0:20:09- Is it your pen pal? - ..Lord Byron my pen pal.
0:20:09 > 0:20:13It is poetry. It is by Lord Byron. Congratulations.
0:20:18 > 0:20:21It is from the poem When We Two Parted. So there you go, well done.
0:20:21 > 0:20:24Both teams got that correct, which means Harley and Sonia,
0:20:24 > 0:20:26you can both hand in your homework.
0:20:31 > 0:20:34So, this is the round where everything goes a bit pear-shaped.
0:20:34 > 0:20:37Yes, it's our intentionally difficult Art Round.
0:20:37 > 0:20:41Stepping to the art board are Harley and Sonia, so come with me
0:20:41 > 0:20:44and let's see what you're painting with today. Come on.
0:20:49 > 0:20:50So, as you can see, Harley
0:20:50 > 0:20:53and Sonia are both wearing a couple of very special painting jackets.
0:20:53 > 0:20:55Stick your hands up. Go on.
0:20:55 > 0:20:57SONIA: Can I take this home with me?
0:20:57 > 0:21:01Yeah, look at that. It's good if you need to get something out the attic.
0:21:01 > 0:21:04OK, guys, here's what you're painting for your teams.
0:21:04 > 0:21:05Look at that.
0:21:07 > 0:21:08OK, OK.
0:21:08 > 0:21:10You guys have got to guess what Harley
0:21:10 > 0:21:13and Sonia are painting with their big long arms.
0:21:13 > 0:21:15The team that guesses the correct answer first gets to
0:21:15 > 0:21:17hand in their homework.
0:21:17 > 0:21:19Three, two, one, let's get painting!
0:21:23 > 0:21:24Red, red, red.
0:21:25 > 0:21:26Red Sea.
0:21:26 > 0:21:27Curly hair.
0:21:27 > 0:21:29Don't get distracted by the red.
0:21:32 > 0:21:33Oh, that's good so far.
0:21:35 > 0:21:39- A man in a tuxedo. - It's not a man, it's not a man.
0:21:39 > 0:21:43- Underwater archer firing arrows... - What are you drawing?
0:21:43 > 0:21:45Darts in the sea.
0:21:45 > 0:21:46It's not the sea.
0:21:47 > 0:21:48Is it a water raft?
0:21:50 > 0:21:52Is it a bird?
0:21:52 > 0:21:53It's a giant. Why is there a giant?
0:21:55 > 0:21:57More paint, Sonia, more paint. Get some more paint on there.
0:21:58 > 0:22:00Get some more paint on there.
0:22:00 > 0:22:02It's a massive giant on a slide in the forest.
0:22:02 > 0:22:05It's sort of like a forest, but it's more fun.
0:22:05 > 0:22:06More fun than a forest.
0:22:06 > 0:22:09Like a garden. A garden of dreams.
0:22:10 > 0:22:11In a park.
0:22:11 > 0:22:12In a park, in a park.
0:22:12 > 0:22:15- SCHOOL BELL RINGS - We have got a right answer.
0:22:15 > 0:22:17Well done, Dan. Let's have a look at the pictures.
0:22:17 > 0:22:19- I'm going to go to Sonia first. - It's really bad.
0:22:19 > 0:22:23- I want you to talk me through your park, Sonia.- Right, OK.- Who's this?
0:22:23 > 0:22:24That's supposed to be a kid.
0:22:24 > 0:22:26- Right.- It's a stick kid.
0:22:26 > 0:22:29- It didn't really turn out well. - I thought it was a dog.
0:22:29 > 0:22:31- I thought it was a dog. - This is the sun?- That's the sun.
0:22:31 > 0:22:32Right, then I want to know...
0:22:32 > 0:22:36- That's meant to be a seesaw, but it didn't really work.- Ah!
0:22:36 > 0:22:38It looks like a pitchfork.
0:22:39 > 0:22:41Let's go over to Harley, the winning team.
0:22:41 > 0:22:44Harley, talk us through your park.
0:22:44 > 0:22:45What's this?
0:22:45 > 0:22:49That is a stick man on a slide. They are two trees.
0:22:49 > 0:22:51Why is the man double the size of the trees?
0:22:51 > 0:22:53Because he's closer to us.
0:22:53 > 0:22:54Oh.
0:23:00 > 0:23:03Harley, that is an absolutely brilliant job. Well done.
0:23:03 > 0:23:05- But your hands are a bit busy, aren't they?- Yeah.
0:23:05 > 0:23:08So, Chris, I'm going to give you the ultimate honour.
0:23:08 > 0:23:11You can hand in your homework. Let's do it, come on.
0:23:16 > 0:23:21OK, sadly, guys, we are nearing the end of the show.
0:23:21 > 0:23:23ALL: Aww!
0:23:23 > 0:23:26I know, which means it's time to play All Kinds Of Wrong.
0:23:26 > 0:23:28We're going to fire out all sorts of questions.
0:23:28 > 0:23:30When the spotlight stops on you,
0:23:30 > 0:23:34I want you to answer my question with the wrong answer.
0:23:34 > 0:23:38Every wrong answer is another piece of homework in the bank.
0:23:38 > 0:23:40OK, Harley's team, your team is up first.
0:23:40 > 0:23:42Please make your way to the Wrong Ray.
0:23:50 > 0:23:53Your time starts in - three, two, one...go!
0:23:53 > 0:23:57Complete the famous question - which came first, the chicken or the...?
0:23:57 > 0:23:59Poo. DING!
0:23:59 > 0:24:02What do you traditionally eat on Pancake Day?
0:24:02 > 0:24:03Maggots.
0:24:03 > 0:24:04DING!
0:24:04 > 0:24:07If you want to cast a spell, you might say abra...
0:24:07 > 0:24:09Cabluey.
0:24:09 > 0:24:10- Correct. - DING!
0:24:10 > 0:24:12Say any word other than egg.
0:24:13 > 0:24:14Egg.
0:24:14 > 0:24:15- Correct. - DING!
0:24:15 > 0:24:18What building does a librarian work in?
0:24:18 > 0:24:20Discotheque.
0:24:20 > 0:24:21DING!
0:24:21 > 0:24:23Fred Flintstone says yabadaba...
0:24:23 > 0:24:26- Mouse. - DING!
0:24:26 > 0:24:28At a panto, you might shout, "He's..."
0:24:30 > 0:24:31Really ugly.
0:24:31 > 0:24:33DING!
0:24:33 > 0:24:35JR Tolkien wrote Lord Of The...
0:24:36 > 0:24:38Bring.
0:24:38 > 0:24:40- Bring.- Correct. - DING!
0:24:40 > 0:24:42In tennis, what does love mean?
0:24:42 > 0:24:45It means everything.
0:24:45 > 0:24:46DING!
0:24:48 > 0:24:51SCHOOL BELL RINGS
0:24:51 > 0:24:53Harley's team, go back to your places.
0:24:57 > 0:24:59Sonia is 12 and is taller than me.
0:24:59 > 0:25:01Susan, you're just further away from the camera.
0:25:03 > 0:25:06OK, so your time starts now.
0:25:06 > 0:25:08What noise does a pirate make?
0:25:08 > 0:25:09Sodium bicarbonate.
0:25:09 > 0:25:10- Correct. - DING!
0:25:10 > 0:25:12Name the actress who plays Tracy Beaker.
0:25:13 > 0:25:15Potato Face.
0:25:15 > 0:25:16DING!
0:25:16 > 0:25:20The massive green statue in New York is called the Statue of...
0:25:20 > 0:25:21Moo.
0:25:21 > 0:25:22- Correct. - DING!
0:25:22 > 0:25:25What do you call an electronic device for doing sums?
0:25:25 > 0:25:27Flamange.
0:25:27 > 0:25:28- DING! - Yes.
0:25:28 > 0:25:31The CBBC show it's Wizards Vs...
0:25:31 > 0:25:32Plungers.
0:25:32 > 0:25:33- Correct. - DING!
0:25:33 > 0:25:35Little Miss Muffet sat on a...?
0:25:36 > 0:25:37Iain Stirling.
0:25:38 > 0:25:40- Correct. - DING!
0:25:40 > 0:25:42There's no need to cry over spilled...
0:25:42 > 0:25:43Spiders.
0:25:43 > 0:25:45- Correct. - DING!
0:25:45 > 0:25:46In olden days, knights wore suits of...
0:25:48 > 0:25:49Eh, carrots.
0:25:49 > 0:25:51- Correct. - DING!
0:25:51 > 0:25:54Who wrote the book How To Train Your Dragon?
0:25:54 > 0:25:55Pear Man.
0:25:55 > 0:25:57- Pear Man did write it, correct. - DING!
0:25:57 > 0:25:59SCHOOL BELL RINGS
0:26:01 > 0:26:04Right, guys, we don't know where that leaves the scores,
0:26:04 > 0:26:07so please go back to your desks and we'll find out who scored top marks.
0:26:13 > 0:26:16So it's time to find out which team have come out on top
0:26:16 > 0:26:19and which team will be scraping the bottom of the barrel of Mr Smash.
0:26:19 > 0:26:22MR SMASH GROWLS
0:26:23 > 0:26:25Mr Smash thinks he deserves a spa day,
0:26:25 > 0:26:28so whoever gets detention is going to be giving him the works.
0:26:28 > 0:26:30Just look at the state of those fingernails.
0:26:30 > 0:26:32Gross.
0:26:32 > 0:26:37So it's time to find out which team are swotty and which team are...
0:26:37 > 0:26:38AUDIENCE: Naughty!
0:26:38 > 0:26:39OK.
0:26:40 > 0:26:42AUDIENCE OOHS
0:26:44 > 0:26:47- The winners are...Harley's team! - Yes!
0:26:47 > 0:26:50CHEERING
0:26:50 > 0:26:52Well done, Harley's team.
0:26:52 > 0:26:56Sonia's team, hang your heads in shame and take the Walk Of Shame.
0:26:56 > 0:26:57On you go. Go on.
0:26:57 > 0:26:59# La, la, la, la, losers
0:26:59 > 0:27:01# La, la, la, la, losers
0:27:01 > 0:27:03# La, la, la, la, la, la, la, la
0:27:03 > 0:27:05# Losers. #
0:27:05 > 0:27:08Mr Smash has got hair in places I didn't even know existed.
0:27:08 > 0:27:11It's disgusting. Well, there you go, guys. End of the show.
0:27:11 > 0:27:13Please give it up for everyone in detention.
0:27:13 > 0:27:15You saw Sonia, Susan and Radzi.
0:27:18 > 0:27:22Give it up for our champs, Harley, Dan and Chris.
0:27:22 > 0:27:23CHEERING
0:27:25 > 0:27:27Thank you all for watching.
0:27:27 > 0:27:31Remember, we didn't learn much, but hey, it was fun trying.
0:27:31 > 0:27:32See you all next time on...
0:27:32 > 0:27:36AUDIENCE: The Dog Ate My Homework!
0:27:36 > 0:27:37See ya!