0:00:39 > 0:00:41CHEERING
0:00:48 > 0:00:52Hello, everyone. I'm Iain Stirling and this is The Dog Ate My Homework.
0:00:52 > 0:00:55I'm your host, you are the audience and those guys...
0:00:55 > 0:00:56HE LAUGHS
0:00:56 > 0:00:58AUDIENCE LAUGHS
0:01:00 > 0:01:03Those guys are here.
0:01:03 > 0:01:04All we need now are some guests,
0:01:04 > 0:01:06so let's meet the teams!
0:01:06 > 0:01:08On my right is a girl who passed all of her exams.
0:01:08 > 0:01:10Literally, she drove right past the exam hall.
0:01:10 > 0:01:12It's Sarah, everyone.
0:01:12 > 0:01:14Present!
0:01:15 > 0:01:18And on Sarah's team, someone who was really onboard as a kid,
0:01:18 > 0:01:20that's because she went to surf school.
0:01:20 > 0:01:21It's comedian Bec Hill.
0:01:21 > 0:01:23Present.
0:01:23 > 0:01:26Joining them is someone who loves guessing games at school,
0:01:26 > 0:01:29or, as they're more commonly known, multiple choice.
0:01:29 > 0:01:32It's stand-up superstar, Chris Martin.
0:01:32 > 0:01:35Big up for Sarah's team, everybody!
0:01:35 > 0:01:37CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:01:37 > 0:01:40And on my left, a boy who never lied about his exam results,
0:01:40 > 0:01:44so, with his Master's degree in advanced astrophysics, it's Cory.
0:01:47 > 0:01:51On Cory's team, someone whose career is just like butter -
0:01:51 > 0:01:52it's on a roll.
0:01:52 > 0:01:54From DNN, it's Victoria Cook.
0:01:54 > 0:01:56Here, sir!
0:01:56 > 0:01:58And finally, someone who was once asked to sing
0:01:58 > 0:02:00in front of their entire school.
0:02:00 > 0:02:02It was the only way they could get them to escape during a fire.
0:02:02 > 0:02:05It's funny man, Charlie Baker.
0:02:05 > 0:02:06Here, sir!
0:02:06 > 0:02:07Cory's team!
0:02:10 > 0:02:12It's time now to get on with the show!
0:02:14 > 0:02:17CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:02:17 > 0:02:19This is how the show works -
0:02:19 > 0:02:23both teams go head to head in a battle to the death.
0:02:23 > 0:02:26DRAMATIC MUSIC
0:02:26 > 0:02:30No, wait, no. Sorry, sorry. It's a battle for gold stars.
0:02:30 > 0:02:33Sorry, I read that wrong. Sorry.
0:02:33 > 0:02:35There's only two ways you can bag yourself a gold star -
0:02:35 > 0:02:37firstly, you can be dead.
0:02:37 > 0:02:40DRAMATIC MUSIC
0:02:40 > 0:02:45No, again. No, sorry. Dead clever. Sorry. Dead clever.
0:02:45 > 0:02:47Or you can just be a bit of a loon and make me laugh,
0:02:47 > 0:02:51but any monkey business and I will simply take those gold stars away.
0:02:53 > 0:02:57Iain, what if I gave you £5 million?!
0:02:57 > 0:02:59AUDIENCE: Oooooh!
0:02:59 > 0:03:02I will give you a gold star.
0:03:02 > 0:03:04CHEERING
0:03:04 > 0:03:06- Thank you very much. - That's cheating.
0:03:06 > 0:03:09Stop messing about, guys, cos as you know, it's Iain's school, so it's...
0:03:09 > 0:03:12- AUDIENCE:- Iain's rules! - Yes.
0:03:12 > 0:03:15At the end of the show, the team with the most gold stars wins,
0:03:15 > 0:03:19whilst the loser faces detention with a man so scary
0:03:19 > 0:03:20he comes with an 18 certificate,
0:03:20 > 0:03:23which means legally, most of you guys can't look at him.
0:03:23 > 0:03:26DRAMATIC MUSIC
0:03:27 > 0:03:31RRROOOAAAAARRRR! RRROOOAAAAARRRR!
0:03:31 > 0:03:34RRROOOAAAAARRRR! RRROOOAAAAARRRR!
0:03:34 > 0:03:36BOOING
0:03:36 > 0:03:37RRROOOAAAAARRRR!
0:03:37 > 0:03:41RRROOOAAAAARRRR! RRROOOAAAAARRRR! RRROOOAAAAARRRR!
0:03:41 > 0:03:44AAAAARRRGGGH!
0:03:44 > 0:03:46HE WHIMPERS
0:03:46 > 0:03:48APPLAUSE
0:03:48 > 0:03:50I love a mirror.
0:03:50 > 0:03:52Anyway, it's time now for the first round!
0:03:52 > 0:03:55CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:03:58 > 0:04:01This is Stick To The Point.
0:04:01 > 0:04:03- BOOMING VOICE:- Stick To The Point.
0:04:03 > 0:04:08A game which requires skill, speed of thought and a big stick -
0:04:08 > 0:04:10my stick of pointlessness.
0:04:10 > 0:04:13Yes, which I'm going to model for you right now.
0:04:14 > 0:04:18Iain is modelling the Pro-Turbo Stick 3000.
0:04:18 > 0:04:20It comes with handy appendage, safety grip,
0:04:20 > 0:04:23and is available in Mr-Smash Red or Dog-Poo Brown.
0:04:23 > 0:04:24With all the features of a stick,
0:04:24 > 0:04:28this is one stick you won't want to be stuck without.
0:04:28 > 0:04:30It's the Dog Ate My Homework pointing stick!
0:04:30 > 0:04:32LOUD FART
0:04:36 > 0:04:40I don't regret doing that. OK. We'll ask quickfire questions.
0:04:40 > 0:04:42If you hesitate, repeat or just talk gibberish,
0:04:42 > 0:04:44I will put you in the shush position.
0:04:44 > 0:04:48Can I see your shush positions, please?
0:04:48 > 0:04:53Lovely stuff. The winner is the last team talking. OK, we'll start now.
0:04:53 > 0:04:55The first topic is things you find on the beach.
0:04:55 > 0:04:56Victoria!
0:04:56 > 0:04:58Water.
0:05:00 > 0:05:03- That would make it the sea.- Oh, no! - BUZZER
0:05:03 > 0:05:05Shush position, please.
0:05:05 > 0:05:08- Chris.- I thought you were going to call me Crisp. Sand.
0:05:08 > 0:05:10You hesitated. BUZZER
0:05:10 > 0:05:12- Shush position. - You said my name weird.
0:05:12 > 0:05:15I didn't say your name weird! My school, my rules. Charlie Baker.
0:05:15 > 0:05:17- Shells.- OK. Sarah.
0:05:17 > 0:05:19- Rock pools.- Yes, please. Cory.
0:05:19 > 0:05:21- Sand.- Yes, please.
0:05:21 > 0:05:25See that, mate, that's how you do it. He's a child. OK. Charlie.
0:05:25 > 0:05:27Sleeping grandads.
0:05:27 > 0:05:30Yes. They love a sleep on the beach, a grandad.
0:05:30 > 0:05:34"Let's go somewhere fun so I can sleep." Sarah.
0:05:34 > 0:05:37Ditches, cos, like, kids dig the really big holes.
0:05:37 > 0:05:39Yeah. I fell in one, one time.
0:05:41 > 0:05:42Cory.
0:05:42 > 0:05:45- Umbrellas.- Yes, please. Sarah.
0:05:45 > 0:05:47BUZZER
0:05:47 > 0:05:51- I was going to say umbrellas, though.- Yes, but you didn't.
0:05:51 > 0:05:53Shush position, please.
0:05:53 > 0:05:54For the chatterbox. Charlie.
0:05:54 > 0:05:56- Pedalo.- Yes, please. Bec.
0:05:56 > 0:05:57Towels.
0:05:57 > 0:05:58Yes, please. Cory.
0:05:58 > 0:05:59- Blankets.- Bec.
0:05:59 > 0:06:01Theme parks.
0:06:01 > 0:06:04- Yeah, you can. - You're in the shush position!
0:06:04 > 0:06:06- Sorry.- Get in it! Charlie.
0:06:06 > 0:06:08- Dropped ice creams. - Yes, please. Bec.
0:06:08 > 0:06:12- Non-dropped ice creams. - Oh! Cory.
0:06:12 > 0:06:14- Rocks.- Bec.
0:06:14 > 0:06:16- Molluscs.- Yes!
0:06:16 > 0:06:18Get in the shush position! SARAH GIGGLES
0:06:18 > 0:06:21Shut up!
0:06:21 > 0:06:22Stop it!
0:06:22 > 0:06:24Charlie.
0:06:24 > 0:06:25- Dried-out seaweed.- Yes, please. Bec.
0:06:25 > 0:06:27- Tourists! - BUZZER
0:06:27 > 0:06:28Shush position!
0:06:28 > 0:06:30Star goes to Cory!
0:06:30 > 0:06:33CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:06:35 > 0:06:42The next one is things that wake you up. Things that wake you up. Sarah.
0:06:42 > 0:06:44- Sisters.- Yes, please. Cory.
0:06:44 > 0:06:47- Monsters.- Yes, please. Bec.
0:06:47 > 0:06:49Needing to pee.
0:06:49 > 0:06:52It gets worse as you get older, children.
0:06:52 > 0:06:55- Victoria.- When you do a big snore.
0:06:55 > 0:06:57SHE SNORTS
0:06:59 > 0:07:02You've snored yourself awake?
0:07:02 > 0:07:05Not me, like... Just, you know, like my friend.
0:07:07 > 0:07:09What's your friend's name?
0:07:09 > 0:07:11Mictoria?
0:07:11 > 0:07:13- Yeah, Mictoria.- Chris.
0:07:13 > 0:07:17- Nightmares.- Oh, yes. Charlie.
0:07:17 > 0:07:19- My mum. - AUDIENCE: Aw!
0:07:19 > 0:07:23- Wait, wait, wait, don't "Aw". Now?- Yeah, she stays over sometimes.
0:07:23 > 0:07:26- She gets you up in the morning? - Yeah, cup of tea. Or my dad.
0:07:26 > 0:07:28That was my next answer.
0:07:28 > 0:07:30- You've ruined it. - I've gone two for one.
0:07:30 > 0:07:32I've ruined it for anyone now.
0:07:32 > 0:07:36- Bec.- Alarm clocks.- Yes, please. Chris.
0:07:36 > 0:07:37Cat running across your belly.
0:07:37 > 0:07:39Yeah.
0:07:39 > 0:07:42- It can happen.- That would wake you up.- It would wake you up.
0:07:42 > 0:07:43It would wake you up -
0:07:43 > 0:07:46let's just mention really weird stuff. Victoria.
0:07:46 > 0:07:50When your hamster snores.
0:07:50 > 0:07:52I can see where this is going. Bec.
0:07:52 > 0:07:54Breaking wind.
0:07:54 > 0:07:59I did. I once farted really loudly in my sleep and it woke me up.
0:07:59 > 0:08:02My dad once farted in his sleep and thought we were being robbed.
0:08:02 > 0:08:04Honestly, true. That is honestly true.
0:08:04 > 0:08:06Where did he think he was robbing?
0:08:06 > 0:08:10I don't know. He just went... "Oh, there's someone in the house!"
0:08:10 > 0:08:11Bec.
0:08:11 > 0:08:12- Sunshine.- Yeah. Cory.
0:08:12 > 0:08:15- Alarm clocks. - BUZZER
0:08:15 > 0:08:19We've had that. All right. Shush position, please. Sarah.
0:08:19 > 0:08:20- BUZZER - Doorbell!
0:08:20 > 0:08:25- The doorbell.- Shush position. Victoria.
0:08:25 > 0:08:27Your dressing gown.
0:08:27 > 0:08:28No, no, no.
0:08:28 > 0:08:30You know when you're asleep and then you wake up
0:08:30 > 0:08:33and you see your dressing gown hanging on the door and you go...
0:08:33 > 0:08:34- Aaaagh!- Charlie.
0:08:34 > 0:08:36If you're camping, the sun.
0:08:36 > 0:08:38BUZZER We've had the sun.
0:08:38 > 0:08:41- It was called sunshine by its full name.- Shush position.
0:08:41 > 0:08:43That's Australian sunshine. It's different.
0:08:43 > 0:08:45No, get in the shush position. Vic.
0:08:45 > 0:08:46Your nose whistling.
0:08:49 > 0:08:51You sound like the loudest sleeper of all.
0:08:51 > 0:08:53SNORING/BURBLING/FARTING
0:08:54 > 0:08:57"Oh, me dressing gown!" Chris.
0:08:57 > 0:09:01- The sound of Victoria. I can hear her.- Victoria.
0:09:01 > 0:09:03When your dog wees on you.
0:09:05 > 0:09:06Bec.
0:09:06 > 0:09:09When your poster falls down halfway through the night
0:09:09 > 0:09:11and there's that sound.
0:09:11 > 0:09:12It's true! It's true!
0:09:12 > 0:09:14Above your head, it falls on you.
0:09:16 > 0:09:18"Ah! Get off me!"
0:09:18 > 0:09:19Chris.
0:09:19 > 0:09:23The thought of seeing you for an afternoon. That wakes me up.
0:09:23 > 0:09:25I had a terrible sleep last night.
0:09:25 > 0:09:27Shush position. BUZZER
0:09:27 > 0:09:29Bec.
0:09:29 > 0:09:30- The tooth fairy.- Vic.
0:09:30 > 0:09:32Christmas trees!
0:09:32 > 0:09:38In the shush position. I'm giving the points to Sarah's team there.
0:09:38 > 0:09:40BELL
0:09:40 > 0:09:43It's time up. The gold star goes to...
0:09:43 > 0:09:45both of you. It's a draw.
0:09:45 > 0:09:48CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:09:53 > 0:09:56Time now for Pie The Supply.
0:09:56 > 0:09:57- BOOMING VOICE:- Pie The Supply!
0:09:57 > 0:10:00Yes. Here at Iain's School of Being Fantastic,
0:10:00 > 0:10:02we're looking for a new PE Teacher for the day.
0:10:02 > 0:10:05All teams have to do is guess which is a real teacher
0:10:05 > 0:10:08and which is less qualified than Mr Smash.
0:10:08 > 0:10:11So let's bring out our teachers.
0:10:11 > 0:10:14BOOING
0:10:21 > 0:10:26Terrible teachers trying to improve children's futures. Boo indeed!
0:10:26 > 0:10:30One is a PE teacher. The other three are big fat phoneys.
0:10:30 > 0:10:32Which are which?
0:10:32 > 0:10:34Cory, first impressions - which looks like a PE teacher,
0:10:34 > 0:10:37which ones don't? What are you thinking?
0:10:37 > 0:10:40Number 2 looks a bit like a PE teacher.
0:10:40 > 0:10:42Number 2 has got the gear.
0:10:42 > 0:10:45Yeah, she looks a bit strong as well. Strong woman.
0:10:45 > 0:10:49Yeah, but number 4 looks like he's been outside.
0:10:49 > 0:10:51Yeah.
0:10:51 > 0:10:53I think number 4 looks like, you know...
0:10:53 > 0:10:55I mean, number 4, just for the record,
0:10:55 > 0:10:58is doing that thing blokes do when they get their photo taken
0:10:58 > 0:11:00when you go, "Take my photo.
0:11:00 > 0:11:02"This is how I look all the time, mate.
0:11:02 > 0:11:05"I'm not even doing anything, eh?"
0:11:05 > 0:11:08I don't think PE teachers wear glasses. I don't know why.
0:11:08 > 0:11:10Number 3, you look too clever to be a PE teacher.
0:11:10 > 0:11:12- SARAH:- He looks like a maths teacher.
0:11:12 > 0:11:14No offence to the actual PE teacher.
0:11:14 > 0:11:15Everyone is going past number 1,
0:11:15 > 0:11:17that's why I think, secretly, maybe she is.
0:11:17 > 0:11:20Number 1 looks like she forgot to dress like a PE teacher
0:11:20 > 0:11:23and the BBC have gone, "Quick, stick on this hoodie."
0:11:23 > 0:11:25I'll tell you what - help you out,
0:11:25 > 0:11:27I'm going to read out our teachers' CVs.
0:11:27 > 0:11:29A little fact about all of them. Here we go.
0:11:29 > 0:11:33Teacher number 1 is Miss Hart. She's been a PE teacher for nine years.
0:11:33 > 0:11:35She fell in a swimming pool during a lesson
0:11:35 > 0:11:38and plays competitive Scrabble in her spare time.
0:11:38 > 0:11:40AUDIENCE: Oooooh!
0:11:40 > 0:11:42Teacher number 2 is Miss Manley.
0:11:42 > 0:11:44She's been a PE teacher for three years.
0:11:44 > 0:11:46Whilst showing her class how to throw a javelin,
0:11:46 > 0:11:47she accidentally farted.
0:11:49 > 0:11:52Teacher number 3 is Mr Mgomi.
0:11:52 > 0:11:54He's been a teacher for 16 years.
0:11:54 > 0:11:58He once lost a 100m sprint to a 12-year-old pupil during sports day.
0:12:00 > 0:12:03Mr Gillespie has been a PE teacher for a year.
0:12:03 > 0:12:05During a gymnastics demonstration,
0:12:05 > 0:12:08he ripped his trousers right up his bottom in front of a whole class.
0:12:10 > 0:12:11So who do you think it is?
0:12:11 > 0:12:14Cory's team, you can ask some questions now.
0:12:14 > 0:12:15They can speak,
0:12:15 > 0:12:18so have you got any questions for our budding PE teachers?
0:12:18 > 0:12:20Could number 4 show us how to do a shot put?
0:12:20 > 0:12:22He looks like he could do a good shot put.
0:12:22 > 0:12:24Sure.
0:12:25 > 0:12:27- Whoa!- He looked like he could do it.
0:12:27 > 0:12:30Oh. Number 1, could you show us the hammer throw, please?
0:12:30 > 0:12:33LAUGHTER
0:12:33 > 0:12:36- I don't think it's number 1. - No, wait.
0:12:36 > 0:12:38Let number 1 do her hammer throw.
0:12:38 > 0:12:40Don't look at the PE teacher and ask!
0:12:44 > 0:12:45Cory, can you do the hammer?
0:12:45 > 0:12:48You spin round... That's it, that's it.
0:12:48 > 0:12:49Yes, Cory!
0:12:49 > 0:12:53So, there you go, Cory. You're the PE teacher and you're getting pied.
0:12:53 > 0:12:56All right, Cory, have you got another question?
0:12:56 > 0:12:58What are your favourite sports to teach?
0:12:58 > 0:13:00All right, number 3, favourite sport?
0:13:00 > 0:13:04- Rugby.- OK, number 2? - I like doing dancing.
0:13:04 > 0:13:06Oh. Curveball. Number 4.
0:13:06 > 0:13:08Ultimate Frisbee.
0:13:10 > 0:13:12I mean, no-one saw that coming.
0:13:13 > 0:13:16Is number 4 a Frisbee salesman?
0:13:16 > 0:13:19"Ultimate Frisbee."
0:13:19 > 0:13:21Number 1, what's your favourite sport?
0:13:21 > 0:13:24- Netball. - There you go.- Classic.
0:13:24 > 0:13:26Anyone got any more questions?
0:13:26 > 0:13:30- SARAH:- What is the point of the rope that you have to climb up in school?
0:13:30 > 0:13:31OK, we'll start with 2.
0:13:31 > 0:13:34If you're cheeky, you get to climb that rope.
0:13:34 > 0:13:36Oh! As a punishment. Number 1?
0:13:36 > 0:13:39- To strengthen your muscles. - IAIN LAUGHS
0:13:39 > 0:13:43- Very vague. - I want it to be number 1 so much!
0:13:43 > 0:13:46- Number- 4? So you can reach heights others fail to.
0:13:46 > 0:13:48Oh!
0:13:48 > 0:13:50I want you to hug me right now.
0:13:50 > 0:13:54I think number 4 has too much hope to be a PE teacher.
0:13:54 > 0:13:56He's a motivational speaker.
0:13:56 > 0:13:58"Guys, one day you can live in a paradise
0:13:58 > 0:14:00"where we can all play Ultimate Frisbee."
0:14:04 > 0:14:06Finally, number 3?
0:14:06 > 0:14:09- Upper-body strength. - Upper-body strength.
0:14:09 > 0:14:10Is the correct answer.
0:14:10 > 0:14:13All right, OK, audience, who do you think it is? Shout out on three.
0:14:13 > 0:14:15One, two, three. Who do you think is the teacher?
0:14:15 > 0:14:18AUDIENCE SHOUTS
0:14:18 > 0:14:21OK, guys, either a lot of people think it's number 2
0:14:21 > 0:14:24or a lot of people are doing Winston Churchill impressions
0:14:24 > 0:14:25for no reason. We don't know.
0:14:25 > 0:14:28Cory, it's time for you to come over and...
0:14:28 > 0:14:31- BOOMING VOICE:- Pie the supply!
0:14:31 > 0:14:36One of them is a teacher. Let's hope he gets the teacher. Here we go.
0:14:36 > 0:14:39ALL: Ooooooh!
0:14:41 > 0:14:43APPLAUSE
0:14:45 > 0:14:48OK, Sarah, time for you to...
0:14:48 > 0:14:50- BOOMING VOICE:- Pie the supply!
0:14:50 > 0:14:52OK, here we go.
0:14:53 > 0:14:55AUDIENCE: Ooooooh!
0:14:58 > 0:15:01LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE
0:15:13 > 0:15:17I didn't mean to do it that hard.
0:15:17 > 0:15:19It was a good throwing technique.
0:15:19 > 0:15:22- That was the most brutal thing I've ever seen.- I'm so sorry.
0:15:22 > 0:15:24I didn't mean to do it that hard.
0:15:24 > 0:15:25- CHRIS:- She got so excited.
0:15:25 > 0:15:27- CHARLIE:- I liked number 4's old nose.
0:15:29 > 0:15:33He looked like a PE teacher, now he looks like a former rugby player.
0:15:33 > 0:15:36Right, if it's not number 4 now, Sarah, you're in a lot of trouble.
0:15:36 > 0:15:40OK, would the real supply teacher please step forward.
0:15:42 > 0:15:44Oh!
0:15:44 > 0:15:46Whoo!
0:15:49 > 0:15:51Oh, he's a good sport. Right, quickly, quickly,
0:15:51 > 0:15:54while they're drying off, Cory's team, why number 2?
0:15:54 > 0:15:57She was wearing the proper trainers and everything!
0:15:59 > 0:16:02If you hadn't worn those shoes, you'd be pie-free!
0:16:02 > 0:16:04Sarah's team, why did you assault number 4?
0:16:04 > 0:16:07He just looked really, you know, muscly
0:16:07 > 0:16:11and he looked like a PE teacher that you would see at my school.
0:16:11 > 0:16:14I do not want to be a PE teacher at your school.
0:16:14 > 0:16:19OK, at the end of that round, the gold star goes to Sarah's team!
0:16:19 > 0:16:21CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:16:25 > 0:16:31Right, now time for drama in the show everyone is calling Mime Craft.
0:16:31 > 0:16:32- BOOMING VOICE:- Mime Craft!
0:16:32 > 0:16:35This is where I ask one member of each team to take to the stage
0:16:35 > 0:16:37and act their socks off.
0:16:37 > 0:16:39They'll have to act out musical activities
0:16:39 > 0:16:41as displayed on the flippy thing.
0:16:41 > 0:16:44The rest of their teams have to guess what they're doing.
0:16:44 > 0:16:45First to go is Sarah's team.
0:16:45 > 0:16:49Sarah, who do you think should mime their own business?
0:16:49 > 0:16:51Um...
0:16:51 > 0:16:52I think Bec.
0:16:52 > 0:16:55All right, Bec, you'll please make your way to the mime area.
0:16:55 > 0:16:58CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:16:58 > 0:17:01Watch the door, watch the door, watch the door!
0:17:01 > 0:17:02Oh, lovely.
0:17:02 > 0:17:04Oh, flyscreen.
0:17:04 > 0:17:07- Oh. - Very Australian.
0:17:07 > 0:17:08Yeah, very Australian.
0:17:08 > 0:17:11Bec, your time starts when Sarah flips over the flippy thing.
0:17:11 > 0:17:12Sarah, take it away.
0:17:14 > 0:17:16- Drums.- Yes.
0:17:16 > 0:17:17Oh.
0:17:19 > 0:17:21- SCOTTISH ACCENT:- Bagpipes.
0:17:21 > 0:17:23Yes. Gold star for the accent.
0:17:23 > 0:17:26- Singing. Vocals.- Opera.
0:17:28 > 0:17:29- Choir.- Choirs!
0:17:29 > 0:17:31Yes.
0:17:31 > 0:17:34- Triangle. - Yes.
0:17:34 > 0:17:36Keep going.
0:17:36 > 0:17:39- Oh, if you get this, I'll be very impressed.- Trombone.- No.
0:17:39 > 0:17:41Rubbish bagpiper.
0:17:43 > 0:17:46- It looks like you're playing a hippo.- Oh, come on, it's massive.
0:17:46 > 0:17:47Brass section.
0:17:47 > 0:17:50- Oh, tuba.- Yes!
0:17:53 > 0:17:54Flute!
0:17:54 > 0:17:57- I know what it is!- Harmonica. - Harmonica.
0:17:59 > 0:18:02Drums. Oh, no.
0:18:02 > 0:18:03Drum kit.
0:18:03 > 0:18:05- Pass. - BUZZER
0:18:05 > 0:18:06Xylophone.
0:18:08 > 0:18:10Maracas!
0:18:12 > 0:18:14- Football! - BELL
0:18:14 > 0:18:16- What was it?- Vuvuzela.
0:18:16 > 0:18:19- What was it? - Vuvuzela.
0:18:19 > 0:18:22Cory, who do you want miming for your team?
0:18:25 > 0:18:27- Look at that. - Vic.- Yeah!
0:18:29 > 0:18:32All right, on you go, Vic. VIC GIGGLES
0:18:33 > 0:18:36Vic, if you just want to take the elevator down to the miming area.
0:18:36 > 0:18:38OK.
0:18:40 > 0:18:43Lovely. Lovely. OK, Vic. Oh, lovely, up and down.
0:18:43 > 0:18:46Vic, your time starts when Cory flips over the first board.
0:18:46 > 0:18:48Here we go.
0:18:48 > 0:18:50Piano.
0:18:50 > 0:18:52Yes, please.
0:18:52 > 0:18:53- Violin.- Violin.
0:18:53 > 0:18:55Yes, a very small one, apparently.
0:18:55 > 0:18:58- Guitar. Bass guitar. - A type of guitar.- Electric guitar.
0:18:58 > 0:19:00Lead guitar, electric guitar.
0:19:00 > 0:19:03- She's moving like a type of person from a country.- Flamenco.
0:19:03 > 0:19:04Spanish guitar.
0:19:04 > 0:19:07Yes!
0:19:07 > 0:19:10No, that's not how you play that.
0:19:11 > 0:19:13Pass.
0:19:13 > 0:19:15- Harp.- Harp.
0:19:15 > 0:19:17Yes.
0:19:17 > 0:19:19- Trombone.- Trombone.
0:19:19 > 0:19:20Guitar. Ukulele.
0:19:20 > 0:19:21Ukulele, guitar.
0:19:21 > 0:19:24- Electric guitar. - Stop cleaning windows.
0:19:24 > 0:19:26Show guitar.
0:19:26 > 0:19:27- No.- Pass.
0:19:27 > 0:19:29Banjo. You were looking for.
0:19:29 > 0:19:31- Bass guitar. - Yes.
0:19:33 > 0:19:36I mean, they're all very similar instruments this side.
0:19:36 > 0:19:39- Another guitar.- Yep, another guitar. Smaller than a banjo.
0:19:39 > 0:19:40Ukulele.
0:19:42 > 0:19:45Ha! It's all the same.
0:19:46 > 0:19:48The Proclaimers!
0:19:50 > 0:19:51Cello!
0:19:54 > 0:19:56Spanish castanets.
0:19:56 > 0:19:58What?! Amazing!
0:19:58 > 0:19:59So good at this game.
0:19:59 > 0:20:03- Frying pan. Bacon and eggs. - Pan, it's a pan.
0:20:03 > 0:20:05Timpani, timpani drums.
0:20:05 > 0:20:07BELL
0:20:09 > 0:20:11- Steel pans! - Time is up.
0:20:11 > 0:20:13I can reveal that the winner of that round
0:20:13 > 0:20:16and getting themselves a gold star is...
0:20:16 > 0:20:17Cory's team!
0:20:17 > 0:20:20CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:20:25 > 0:20:30Thank you. English now in a round we call Body Language.
0:20:30 > 0:20:32- BOOMING VOICE:- Body Language!
0:20:32 > 0:20:33Ooh, hello.
0:20:33 > 0:20:36This relies on our teams' spelling not being sketchy
0:20:36 > 0:20:39and their bodies being a little bit stretchy.
0:20:39 > 0:20:42Both teams take it in turns to spell out a series of three-letter words
0:20:42 > 0:20:45using nothing but their legs and arms.
0:20:45 > 0:20:47Cory's team, you're up first.
0:20:47 > 0:20:51Right, now, we need to call down the Body Language Frame!
0:20:59 > 0:21:01Guys, you're looking great. Charlie, how do you feel?
0:21:01 > 0:21:03Frame-ous.
0:21:03 > 0:21:05AUDIENCE GROANS
0:21:05 > 0:21:06How do you feel, Vicky?
0:21:06 > 0:21:08I feel great!
0:21:08 > 0:21:11Cory, how do you feel?
0:21:11 > 0:21:13Special!
0:21:13 > 0:21:15That's all you needed, a bit of pizzazz, mate.
0:21:15 > 0:21:16Yeah. Sorry, mate.
0:21:16 > 0:21:18Guys, you've got until the school bell rings
0:21:18 > 0:21:20to get as many correct answers as possible.
0:21:20 > 0:21:22Your time starts when I ask you the first question.
0:21:22 > 0:21:25I'm about to ask you the first question. Good luck. Here we go.
0:21:25 > 0:21:28Ghosts might say this to you.
0:21:28 > 0:21:31- Say the answer and then spell the answer.- Boo!
0:21:31 > 0:21:32- Boo.- Boo!- Oh.
0:21:35 > 0:21:38- Where's your B?- That's the B!
0:21:38 > 0:21:41What are you doing?! What's this part doing?!
0:21:41 > 0:21:45There you go. What noise would a human cow make?
0:21:45 > 0:21:48What noise would a human cow make?!
0:21:48 > 0:21:49What are you doing?!
0:21:49 > 0:21:50Moo! Muh!
0:21:50 > 0:21:53You're doing the letter, not the animal!
0:21:53 > 0:21:55That's a "muh", that's a "muh".
0:21:55 > 0:21:57- How is that a "muh"?- OK.
0:21:58 > 0:22:01Are you a little teapot? What are you doing?
0:22:02 > 0:22:06Look, watch the child show you how to do it.
0:22:06 > 0:22:08There you go, there you go.
0:22:08 > 0:22:12Use this to cool down on a hot day. Iain's got loads of them.
0:22:12 > 0:22:14- Fan.- Fan!
0:22:14 > 0:22:17- Another A.- What is that?!
0:22:17 > 0:22:19Why are you using your tongue?!
0:22:19 > 0:22:22Do that. Do that.
0:22:22 > 0:22:24Look at Cory. Watch Cory!
0:22:25 > 0:22:29- Do your A. Charlie.- Yeah. - Don't trump.
0:22:29 > 0:22:33OK. Short for tuxedo.
0:22:33 > 0:22:35Tux.
0:22:36 > 0:22:40T. I mean, it's the easiest one. It's the easiest one.
0:22:40 > 0:22:42- You're a U.- That's it. Good U, Cory.
0:22:42 > 0:22:44Oh, look at that!
0:22:44 > 0:22:46CHEERING
0:22:46 > 0:22:48Bonus star for Cory.
0:22:48 > 0:22:51You can have this boiled, scrambled, fried or poached.
0:22:51 > 0:22:52- Egg!- Chocolate.
0:22:52 > 0:22:53Chocolate?!
0:22:57 > 0:23:00Stop sticking your tongue out all the time!
0:23:00 > 0:23:02Do that, do that.
0:23:02 > 0:23:04Do a G, are you doing a G?
0:23:04 > 0:23:08- Put your hands together.- This is a G, I think. No, that's a G.
0:23:08 > 0:23:09- You've got a G, Cory. - I know, I'm trying.
0:23:09 > 0:23:12- Put your hands together, Cory. - Put your hands together, Cory.
0:23:12 > 0:23:15Then get your leg out.
0:23:15 > 0:23:17Finally, short for laughing out loud.
0:23:17 > 0:23:18LOL.
0:23:24 > 0:23:26She got one right! She got one right!
0:23:28 > 0:23:31There you go. Bonus point for Victoria.
0:23:31 > 0:23:34BELL Oh!
0:23:34 > 0:23:37OK, well done, Cory's team. Please take a seat.
0:23:37 > 0:23:42Sarah, get your team over to the whatever this is called!
0:23:42 > 0:23:44CHEERING
0:23:47 > 0:23:49- BOOMING VOICE:- School disco!
0:23:49 > 0:23:51School disco!
0:23:51 > 0:23:54MUSIC: All Night by Icona Pop
0:23:54 > 0:23:57# We can do this all night
0:23:57 > 0:24:00# Yeah, everything is all right
0:24:00 > 0:24:03# We got the keys to open paradise, yeah, paradise
0:24:03 > 0:24:05# It feels like... #
0:24:07 > 0:24:08MUSIC STOPS ABRUPTLY
0:24:11 > 0:24:13- Guys, are you all ready?- Yeah.- Yeah.
0:24:13 > 0:24:15OK, your time starts when I ask the first question.
0:24:15 > 0:24:18You've got until you hear the school bell. Your first question is...
0:24:18 > 0:24:20It's right under your nose.
0:24:20 > 0:24:22Moustache. No.
0:24:22 > 0:24:24Lip.
0:24:26 > 0:24:27What are you doing, Chris?
0:24:30 > 0:24:31That's better.
0:24:31 > 0:24:33If a huge monster was chasing you, you would?
0:24:33 > 0:24:35Run!
0:24:35 > 0:24:37I was going to say poo.
0:24:37 > 0:24:38LAUGHTER
0:24:40 > 0:24:43It looks like that's what you're about to do.
0:24:43 > 0:24:46My name spelled wrong!
0:24:46 > 0:24:47It's got two I's in it!
0:24:51 > 0:24:53Why are you doing yoga?
0:24:53 > 0:24:54I'm doing my downward dog.
0:24:54 > 0:24:57I think this kind of looks like the evolution of man.
0:24:57 > 0:24:59Yeah, a little bit.
0:24:59 > 0:25:02Something you shouldn't do in the swimming pool. Not poo.
0:25:03 > 0:25:05Scottish term for small.
0:25:05 > 0:25:07Oh, wee.
0:25:07 > 0:25:10It's "wee", you Australian and English dafties.
0:25:11 > 0:25:14I don't know whether to do a capital or...
0:25:14 > 0:25:17Just do what you... Vibe it, vibe it.
0:25:17 > 0:25:19Who ate the homework?
0:25:19 > 0:25:21- Dog. - Correct. Get it spelt.
0:25:23 > 0:25:25G is tricky, G is tricky.
0:25:27 > 0:25:28Is that a G?
0:25:28 > 0:25:31No, that looks like you're doing the crane kick from Karate Kid.
0:25:31 > 0:25:35- Anyone got a G?- Is that it? - Are we giving them that?
0:25:35 > 0:25:38- Yeah.- Yeah, go on, then. Animal's coat.
0:25:38 > 0:25:40Fur.
0:25:40 > 0:25:42Fur.
0:25:42 > 0:25:43I feel like I need to...
0:25:43 > 0:25:45Your time is going to run out!
0:25:45 > 0:25:47I'll give you that, I'll give you that.
0:25:47 > 0:25:49- You get this on if you play football.- A dressing gown.
0:25:49 > 0:25:51- No. - Kit. Kit!
0:25:51 > 0:25:54BELL Oh, time's up. Mud.
0:25:54 > 0:25:56I'm not going to lie to you, we ran out of questions
0:25:56 > 0:25:58and I made that last one up.
0:25:59 > 0:26:02Animal's coat - fur. Nothing. Nothing.
0:26:03 > 0:26:05I went on the fly, it wasn't great.
0:26:07 > 0:26:09All right, Sarah, well done. Please take a seat.
0:26:15 > 0:26:17So, at the end of that round,
0:26:17 > 0:26:21I can tell you the gold star goes to Cory's team!
0:26:21 > 0:26:23CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:26:28 > 0:26:29That's the end of the show.
0:26:29 > 0:26:32All that's left for me to do is run a hot bubble bath,
0:26:32 > 0:26:35lie back and listen to some jazz.
0:26:35 > 0:26:39Sorry, that's tonight. Right now, I've got to do the scores.
0:26:39 > 0:26:43Please, bring down the stars!
0:26:43 > 0:26:46AUDIENCE: Ooooh!
0:26:46 > 0:26:49I can tell you that the winner is...
0:26:49 > 0:26:51Cory's team!
0:26:51 > 0:26:54CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:26:57 > 0:27:01Which means, Sarah's team, it's detention with Mr Smash
0:27:01 > 0:27:03and time for the dog to eat your homework.
0:27:03 > 0:27:06So please take the walk of shame.
0:27:06 > 0:27:08- # La, la, la, la-la-la - Losers
0:27:08 > 0:27:10- # La, la, la, la-la-la - Losers
0:27:10 > 0:27:12- # La, la, la, la-la-la - Losers
0:27:12 > 0:27:13- # La, la, la, la-la-la - Losers
0:27:13 > 0:27:17- # La, la, la, la-la-la - Losers
0:27:17 > 0:27:18# Losers! #
0:27:18 > 0:27:19That's all we've got time for.
0:27:19 > 0:27:22As always, we didn't learn much, but it was fun trying.
0:27:22 > 0:27:24See you next time on...
0:27:24 > 0:27:27- AUDIENCE:- The Dog Ate My Homework!
0:27:27 > 0:27:29Sees ya!
0:27:29 > 0:27:32CHEERING AND APPLAUSE