0:00:02 > 0:00:04HE SNORES LOUDLY
0:00:10 > 0:00:13DOG PANTS, MAN GRUNTS
0:00:13 > 0:00:16PANICKED SHOUTS AND SCREAMS
0:00:16 > 0:00:18LAUGHTER
0:00:21 > 0:00:23BELL RINGS
0:00:50 > 0:00:52CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:01:02 > 0:01:04Hola, amigos!
0:01:04 > 0:01:05LAUGHTER
0:01:05 > 0:01:08I'm Iain Stirling and welcome to The Dog Ate My Homework.
0:01:08 > 0:01:10You've turned on the TV,
0:01:10 > 0:01:12you've turned up the volume and I've...
0:01:12 > 0:01:14turned up the handsome.
0:01:17 > 0:01:18Let's take today's register.
0:01:18 > 0:01:21On my right, a boy who in science class claims
0:01:21 > 0:01:24he can turn himself into the Incredible Hulk.
0:01:24 > 0:01:25Always bigging himself up!
0:01:26 > 0:01:28It's Josh! CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:01:28 > 0:01:30Here, sir!
0:01:30 > 0:01:34And on Josh's team, a comedian who has performed to thousands
0:01:34 > 0:01:38on BBC One's mega hit Live At The Apollo,
0:01:38 > 0:01:39or as we like to call it,
0:01:39 > 0:01:42The Dog Ate My Homework warm-up show.
0:01:42 > 0:01:44- It's Jack Carroll. - Here, sir!
0:01:44 > 0:01:45CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:01:45 > 0:01:49Finally, on Josh's team, a comedian obsessed with Twitter.
0:01:49 > 0:01:54So I can only introduce her in 280 characters or less...
0:01:54 > 0:01:56Sorry, I've ran out of characters, which is a shame because
0:01:56 > 0:01:59- I had a very good joke lined up. It's Bec Hill!- Here, sir!
0:01:59 > 0:02:00CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:02:02 > 0:02:06To my left, a girl who has the world's biggest collection
0:02:06 > 0:02:11of paperclips, and if you lay them end to end, it still
0:02:11 > 0:02:13doesn't make it any less weird.
0:02:13 > 0:02:14It's Jenna!
0:02:14 > 0:02:16- Here, sir! - CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:02:16 > 0:02:20On Jenna's team, a wildlife presenter who recently learned
0:02:20 > 0:02:24that if you join all the dots on a leopard, you should run away.
0:02:24 > 0:02:26It's Naomi Wilkinson. CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:02:26 > 0:02:27Here, sir!
0:02:28 > 0:02:32Last but not least, on Jenna's team, a comedian whose new stand-up show
0:02:32 > 0:02:34aims to make politics fun.
0:02:34 > 0:02:37How'd you do that, by not talking about it?
0:02:37 > 0:02:38Yawn!
0:02:39 > 0:02:41Politics is actually very important, kids,
0:02:41 > 0:02:43and you should learn about all the parties.
0:02:43 > 0:02:44It's Tez Ilyas!
0:02:44 > 0:02:46- Here, sir! - CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:02:46 > 0:02:48Can we please applaud both teams?
0:02:48 > 0:02:50CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:02:53 > 0:02:56Stare straight ahead, smile, don't burp,
0:02:56 > 0:02:58and try not to pick your nose.
0:02:58 > 0:03:01What? Oh, that was... that was just for me?
0:03:01 > 0:03:02Sorry, sorry.
0:03:02 > 0:03:05But what our teams have to do is battle it out for
0:03:05 > 0:03:07my precious golden stars.
0:03:07 > 0:03:10- AUDIENCE:- Ooh!
0:03:10 > 0:03:12I'll award bonus stars to anyone who makes me
0:03:12 > 0:03:15burst into spontaneous song, although please don't do that,
0:03:15 > 0:03:17because it would be awful.
0:03:17 > 0:03:22But be warned, give it all that and I'll take those stars back.
0:03:22 > 0:03:24- AUDIENCE:- Aww!
0:03:24 > 0:03:27Hey! Don't grumble, because it's Iain's school, so it's...
0:03:27 > 0:03:29- AUDIENCE:- Iain's rules!
0:03:29 > 0:03:31I've got a catchphrase.
0:03:31 > 0:03:33The team with the most stars at the end of the show are our winners,
0:03:33 > 0:03:35while the losers face detention with a man
0:03:35 > 0:03:38scarier than the tissue your gran keeps up her sleeve. Eugh!
0:03:38 > 0:03:40It's Mr Smash.
0:03:40 > 0:03:41Argh!
0:03:41 > 0:03:43BOOING
0:03:44 > 0:03:46HE GRUNTS AND LAUGHS
0:03:50 > 0:03:51Argh!
0:03:54 > 0:03:56Argh!
0:03:59 > 0:04:01Huh? Ha-ha-ha-ha!
0:04:03 > 0:04:06LAUGHTER
0:04:06 > 0:04:08I mean, that was ridiculous.
0:04:10 > 0:04:12So stupid.
0:04:13 > 0:04:15Trust me, you don't want to go shopping with Smashy,
0:04:15 > 0:04:18it's a nightmare, so let's get on with the show!
0:04:18 > 0:04:19CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:04:24 > 0:04:26Time now for Stick To The Point.
0:04:26 > 0:04:28- ANNOUNCER:- Stick To The Point!
0:04:28 > 0:04:31I'll ask questions and if our teams are too slow, repeat an answer
0:04:31 > 0:04:35or just shout "I cannae take it!", which happens quite a lot,
0:04:35 > 0:04:37we'll put them in the shush position.
0:04:37 > 0:04:39Can I see your shush positions, everyone?
0:04:39 > 0:04:41Lovely. Lovely.
0:04:41 > 0:04:45But of course, to do this, I need my stick of pointiness!
0:04:45 > 0:04:48UPBEAT ROCKY GUITAR MUSIC PLAYS
0:05:00 > 0:05:02Thank you very much.
0:05:02 > 0:05:03And go again.
0:05:03 > 0:05:05UPBEAT ROCKY GUITAR MUSIC PLAYS
0:05:14 > 0:05:18Smash and the dog, everybody! CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:05:18 > 0:05:20So you know the rules, last team speaking wins,
0:05:20 > 0:05:21we are going to start easy.
0:05:21 > 0:05:24Things you would find in a science class.
0:05:24 > 0:05:25- Josh?- Thermometer.
0:05:25 > 0:05:27- Lovely stuff. Jenna?- Tripod.
0:05:27 > 0:05:29Tripod, lovely stuff.
0:05:29 > 0:05:31- Bec?- Bunsen burner!
0:05:31 > 0:05:33Why did you say it like that?
0:05:33 > 0:05:35It's more fun that way.
0:05:35 > 0:05:38- Naomi Wilkinson?- Mrs White, she was my chemistry teacher.
0:05:38 > 0:05:40- Jack!- Explosions.
0:05:40 > 0:05:42They're pretty easy to find.
0:05:42 > 0:05:43- Jenna?- Thermometer.
0:05:43 > 0:05:45Thermometer, we've had it! BUZZER
0:05:45 > 0:05:48- Unlucky, Jenna, shush position. - Oh, no!
0:05:48 > 0:05:49- Josh?- Gas tap.
0:05:49 > 0:05:50Gas tap, yes.
0:05:50 > 0:05:53- Naomi?- Very fetching science goggles.
0:05:53 > 0:05:55Lovely fetching science goggles.
0:05:55 > 0:05:56- Jack?- Gravity.
0:05:58 > 0:06:00You do find gravity, mate. Tez?
0:06:00 > 0:06:02The skeleton hanging off a string.
0:06:02 > 0:06:04- Lovely stuff. Bec?- Gas?
0:06:04 > 0:06:06Just gas. Not the tap.
0:06:06 > 0:06:07Gas. Just farting all the time.
0:06:08 > 0:06:11"I've done a trump." "Get away from the Bunsen burner!"
0:06:13 > 0:06:15- Naomi?- The periodic table.
0:06:15 > 0:06:16Yes, please. Josh?
0:06:16 > 0:06:19BUZZER Shush position. Mate, unlucky.
0:06:19 > 0:06:20- Naomi?- Erm...
0:06:20 > 0:06:23Shush position! Jack.
0:06:23 > 0:06:25Desks.
0:06:25 > 0:06:27I can see where this is going then.
0:06:27 > 0:06:28- Tez?- Thermometers. - BUZZER
0:06:28 > 0:06:31- We've had it!- I know! - Oh, Tez!
0:06:31 > 0:06:32Shush position.
0:06:32 > 0:06:33Points go to Josh's team!
0:06:33 > 0:06:35CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:06:37 > 0:06:39OK, next subject.
0:06:39 > 0:06:42Apps you wish existed.
0:06:42 > 0:06:45- Naomi? - An app to explain your jokes.
0:06:45 > 0:06:47APPLAUSE
0:06:50 > 0:06:52Don't applaud that!
0:06:52 > 0:06:53Why are you applauding that?
0:06:53 > 0:06:55Right, you!
0:06:57 > 0:07:01She walks about, you act like a CBeebies presenter.
0:07:01 > 0:07:04HIGH-PITCHED VOICE: "Oh, I'm so sweet!"
0:07:04 > 0:07:06I'm onto you, Wilkinson!
0:07:06 > 0:07:08HE WHISPERS: I'm on to you.
0:07:08 > 0:07:10And if you applaud one more thing she says...
0:07:13 > 0:07:15APPLAUSE No, no.
0:07:20 > 0:07:21Apps you wish existed, Josh?
0:07:21 > 0:07:23An app that does your homework for free.
0:07:23 > 0:07:26- Oh, does it for free.- That's a good one, that's a good one.
0:07:26 > 0:07:29- KID IN AUDIENCE:- Yeah! - Look at one kid. "Yeah!"
0:07:29 > 0:07:33- Tez?- Mirror, mirror, on the wall, who's the fairest of them all?
0:07:33 > 0:07:34And then it just says you.
0:07:36 > 0:07:38Oh, thanks, mate.
0:07:39 > 0:07:41- Jack?- Angrier Birds.
0:07:46 > 0:07:47Angrier Birds!
0:07:47 > 0:07:52- Tez?- Instagran, so when you're feeling lonely,
0:07:52 > 0:07:55you just call up a gran and they come and make you feel better.
0:07:56 > 0:07:59- Yours are nice.- Do you know what, bonus gold star for cuteness, Tez.
0:07:59 > 0:08:02- Thank you!- You're welcome. AUDIENCE:- Ooh!
0:08:02 > 0:08:03Let's see if we can get more cuteness.
0:08:03 > 0:08:06- Josh!- An app that tells you what to wear for the day.
0:08:06 > 0:08:07Yes, please.
0:08:07 > 0:08:11Or as it's also known as - Iain Stirling's Instagram.
0:08:11 > 0:08:13- Naomi?- An app that gives you superpowers.
0:08:13 > 0:08:15Yes, please.
0:08:15 > 0:08:16Josh!
0:08:16 > 0:08:19- An app...- Mm-hm?- ..that's... - That, mm-hm?
0:08:19 > 0:08:20BUZZER Shush position, mate.
0:08:20 > 0:08:22You're not fooling me.
0:08:22 > 0:08:23An app...
0:08:26 > 0:08:27..that...
0:08:28 > 0:08:30..completes my sentences?
0:08:31 > 0:08:34- Naomi?- Erm...
0:08:34 > 0:08:35BUZZER
0:08:35 > 0:08:37Shush position. Jack?
0:08:37 > 0:08:40Candy Crush, where if you lose you get crushed by a load of candy.
0:08:41 > 0:08:43- Dairy Milk.- I like it.
0:08:43 > 0:08:45- Tez?- An app that lets you travel through so that you can
0:08:45 > 0:08:48just get from one place to another in a split second.
0:08:48 > 0:08:50- What would you call it?- Erm...
0:08:50 > 0:08:52Snap Go.
0:08:54 > 0:08:55Snap Go.
0:08:56 > 0:08:59HE IMITATES TEZ: I'd call it Snap Go.
0:08:59 > 0:09:00Snap Go, bro.
0:09:00 > 0:09:03Is that you looking around... I'd call it, um, Stick Mug.
0:09:05 > 0:09:07Jack?
0:09:07 > 0:09:09BUZZER Shush position.
0:09:09 > 0:09:12- Jenna?- An app that when like... if you want to play football,
0:09:12 > 0:09:15it just makes a football pitch.
0:09:15 > 0:09:16Wow.
0:09:16 > 0:09:18An app that's like going outside.
0:09:21 > 0:09:23- Bec?- Snap Hat...
0:09:23 > 0:09:25IAIN LAUGHS
0:09:25 > 0:09:27..where you can turn into a hat.
0:09:28 > 0:09:31- Jenna?- An app that...
0:09:31 > 0:09:33BUZZER Shush position, it's fine.
0:09:33 > 0:09:34- Bec?- Snap Cat.
0:09:37 > 0:09:38What happens?
0:09:39 > 0:09:42Turns you into a dog, it's quite surprising.
0:09:43 > 0:09:45- Tez?- Snap Hat.
0:09:45 > 0:09:47- BUZZER We've had it!- Oh!
0:09:47 > 0:09:49That means points go to Josh's team!
0:09:49 > 0:09:51BELL RINGS, CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:09:51 > 0:09:55And at the end of that round, I can reveal that the gold star goes to...
0:09:57 > 0:09:58..Josh's team!
0:09:58 > 0:10:00CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:10:04 > 0:10:06Time now for Lunchbox Of Lies!
0:10:06 > 0:10:10- ANNOUNCER:- Lunchbox Of Lies!
0:10:10 > 0:10:12In a moment, I'll ask each member of the team to describe
0:10:12 > 0:10:16the wild and wacky contents of their lunchbox.
0:10:16 > 0:10:20However, one lunchbox is empty, meaning that one of the teams
0:10:20 > 0:10:22is telling a porky pie.
0:10:22 > 0:10:25But all the other team has to do is guess who's fibbing about what's in
0:10:25 > 0:10:28their lunchbox. We'll start with Josh's team,
0:10:28 > 0:10:32so can you please stand up and tell the team what's in your lunchbox?
0:10:32 > 0:10:34We'll start with you, Bec.
0:10:36 > 0:10:40It's some coloured pencils and pencil case
0:10:40 > 0:10:44with Jelly Babies and jelly beans.
0:10:46 > 0:10:47There you go.
0:10:47 > 0:10:49Josh, what's in your lunchbox, mate?
0:10:49 > 0:10:53It is hot dogs on a bed of ping-pong balls.
0:10:55 > 0:10:58"On a bed of," he said it like he was a Michelin chef.
0:10:58 > 0:11:01IN FRENCH ACCENT: "On a bed of ping-pong balls."
0:11:01 > 0:11:02Jack?
0:11:04 > 0:11:08It's a rubber duck floating in a gravy boat.
0:11:08 > 0:11:11There you go. You can ask these guys anything you want about what's
0:11:11 > 0:11:14in their lunchbox and identify who's telling the porky pie.
0:11:14 > 0:11:18What about Bec's pencil case filled with jelly beans?
0:11:18 > 0:11:20Yeah, I think so!
0:11:20 > 0:11:22What sort of pencil case is it?
0:11:22 > 0:11:25- A clear one, clear plastic one. - That's how she can see inside it.
0:11:25 > 0:11:27All right, and what's in the pencil case?
0:11:27 > 0:11:28The jelly beans and Jelly Babies.
0:11:29 > 0:11:31They could be Gummi Bears.
0:11:31 > 0:11:35You don't know the difference between a human being and a bear?
0:11:35 > 0:11:38Josh, are they real hot dogs or toy ones?
0:11:38 > 0:11:40- They are toys.- How many?
0:11:40 > 0:11:43There's about eight.
0:11:43 > 0:11:45How many ping-pong balls?
0:11:45 > 0:11:48- I can't count. - You can't count?
0:11:48 > 0:11:52- No.- Jack, what was in the gravy boat again? Remind me, a rubber duck?
0:11:52 > 0:11:54Rubber duck.
0:11:54 > 0:11:59A little bit of detail for you - it's got a hat, like a...
0:11:59 > 0:12:01a bowler hat and some sunglasses on.
0:12:02 > 0:12:06Not being funny, Jack, but if I did see a duck and it had a hat and some
0:12:06 > 0:12:09sunglasses on that would be one of the first things I'd mention.
0:12:10 > 0:12:13Can you just move it around in the gravy and then show us the gravy on
0:12:13 > 0:12:14your fingers?
0:12:14 > 0:12:16I mean, I could do it...
0:12:16 > 0:12:19- But you're not going to. - No, I'm not going to.
0:12:19 > 0:12:23Where Jack comes from, you don't waste good gravy!
0:12:23 > 0:12:26I'm not putting me fingers int'gravy boat
0:12:26 > 0:12:27and wasting all me gravy!
0:12:27 > 0:12:29I'll drown the duck!
0:12:31 > 0:12:32Where's Jack from?
0:12:32 > 0:12:36He's from the north, but he spent quite a lot of time in Scotland!
0:12:38 > 0:12:40What do you guys think?
0:12:40 > 0:12:41- Bec.- You think Bec?
0:12:41 > 0:12:46- Yeah.- OK, Bec, please reveal if you have the lunchbox of lies.
0:12:46 > 0:12:48CHEERING
0:12:48 > 0:12:50Yay!
0:12:50 > 0:12:52Oh, instant!
0:12:54 > 0:12:56And just for completion,
0:12:56 > 0:13:00Jack and Josh, can you please show us your lunchbox of lies?
0:13:00 > 0:13:01There you go, look.
0:13:03 > 0:13:05- BEC:- That is some old gravy.
0:13:05 > 0:13:08- ANNOUNCER:- School disco!
0:13:08 > 0:13:09School disco!
0:13:09 > 0:13:12MUSIC: Don't Be So Hard On Yourself by Jess Glynne
0:13:25 > 0:13:27RECORD SCRATCHES, MUSIC STOPS
0:13:27 > 0:13:29It's now time for Jenna's team to have a look inside
0:13:29 > 0:13:32their lunchbox, so can you all stand up, please?
0:13:32 > 0:13:35We'll start with you, Naomi Wilkinson,
0:13:35 > 0:13:37what's inside your lunchbox?
0:13:37 > 0:13:43Pineapple with googly eyes and lots of space men flying around.
0:13:43 > 0:13:44Flying around.
0:13:44 > 0:13:48Jenna, what's in your lunchbox? Tell me, please, tell me.
0:13:49 > 0:13:53A rubber glove with carrot fingers and...
0:13:54 > 0:13:57..a human hummus.
0:13:57 > 0:13:59A human hummus?
0:13:59 > 0:14:01LAUGHTER
0:14:04 > 0:14:06What are you made of, like, skin and bones?
0:14:06 > 0:14:08No, chickpeas.
0:14:08 > 0:14:10LAUGHTER
0:14:11 > 0:14:15- Tez Ilyas!- I've got a classic gift of a gift wrapped slice of pizza...
0:14:16 > 0:14:20..on a nest of party blowers.
0:14:20 > 0:14:23OK. Do you want to ask them any questions?
0:14:23 > 0:14:24Yeah, who's lying?
0:14:24 > 0:14:27Any questions, Bec? Go on, you can ask them anything.
0:14:27 > 0:14:31You might want to ask what a human hummus is, for example.
0:14:32 > 0:14:34What colour are the spaceships?
0:14:34 > 0:14:36- It's spacemen.- Oh, sorry, spacemen.
0:14:36 > 0:14:38And they're all different colours.
0:14:38 > 0:14:42There's two little tiny white ones with yellow pants on.
0:14:42 > 0:14:44What, spacemen with just pants on?
0:14:44 > 0:14:46Yeah. All different colours.
0:14:46 > 0:14:49- Tez?- Yes?- What flavour pizza is it?
0:14:49 > 0:14:51It's cheese and tomato with...
0:14:53 > 0:14:57..pepperoni. And what else? Olives.
0:14:57 > 0:15:00If it's giftwrapped, how did you know?
0:15:00 > 0:15:03Because it's been opened.
0:15:04 > 0:15:09Do you want to ask Jenna anything about her rubber glove carrots and
0:15:09 > 0:15:13- human hummus?- Is the hummus in a packaging?
0:15:13 > 0:15:15- It's in a tub.- It's in a tub!
0:15:15 > 0:15:17Does the tub have a sell by date?
0:15:17 > 0:15:19Does the tub have a sell by date, Jenna?
0:15:21 > 0:15:23- Erm, no.- Josh?
0:15:23 > 0:15:28Who do you think has got the Lunchbox Of Lies?
0:15:28 > 0:15:30I'm going to go for Tez.
0:15:30 > 0:15:34Really? After he made such a convincing argument?
0:15:35 > 0:15:37Tez, do you have the Lunchbox Of Lies?
0:15:37 > 0:15:40No!
0:15:40 > 0:15:42APPLAUSE
0:15:44 > 0:15:50Look! It's giftwrapped in paper and it's giftwrapped, see!
0:15:50 > 0:15:52I've explained it quite well.
0:15:52 > 0:15:54No, you explained it terribly,
0:15:54 > 0:15:56that's why they thought you were lying.
0:15:56 > 0:16:01OK, Jenna's team, can you please reveal who has the Lunchbox Of Lies?
0:16:03 > 0:16:05It's Naomi!
0:16:06 > 0:16:10I really wanted to see the spacemen in their pants.
0:16:10 > 0:16:14- Yeah.- I mean, it's a bit worrying that that's what Naomi thought up.
0:16:15 > 0:16:18OK, at the end of that round, the Gold star goes to...
0:16:19 > 0:16:22Jenna's team! APPLAUSE
0:16:26 > 0:16:29Oh, yes baby!
0:16:29 > 0:16:33- It's time for Pie The Supply. - Pie The Supply!
0:16:33 > 0:16:36Once again four dodgy-looking dudes and dudettes
0:16:36 > 0:16:38have waltzed into the studio -
0:16:38 > 0:16:40we really do need better security -
0:16:40 > 0:16:43all claiming to be real deputy head teachers,
0:16:43 > 0:16:45but only one is telling the truth.
0:16:45 > 0:16:50All our teams have to do is decide which one and if both teams fail to
0:16:50 > 0:16:54pie the real teacher, then there will be a penalty.
0:16:54 > 0:16:56EVIL LAUGH
0:17:00 > 0:17:03SPECIAL EFFECT WEARS OFF
0:17:07 > 0:17:09I'd make a rubbish super villain.
0:17:09 > 0:17:11Talking of which, let's meet the teachers.
0:17:11 > 0:17:13We have,
0:17:13 > 0:17:17Mr Campbell, Mr McAlinden,
0:17:17 > 0:17:21Mrs Smith, Mr Hou.
0:17:21 > 0:17:24So there are your four teachers, OK.
0:17:24 > 0:17:28Josh's team, all I want from you guys now, first impressions.
0:17:28 > 0:17:33You're looking at them. Who screams headteacher, but not quite yet?
0:17:35 > 0:17:38Headteacher, someone's in the way.
0:17:39 > 0:17:41So what do you think Josh? You're at school.
0:17:41 > 0:17:43Which one of those four looks teachery to you?
0:17:43 > 0:17:47- I'm thinking number three. - Oh, number three, OK.
0:17:47 > 0:17:49We'll go over to Jenna's team.
0:17:49 > 0:17:51Jenna, what do you think?
0:17:51 > 0:17:53- Three.- You think three as well?
0:17:53 > 0:17:56Three is in the lead for the pie at the minute.
0:17:56 > 0:17:59Right, now we can delve deeper now, we'll go to Josh's team.
0:17:59 > 0:18:00You can ask questions.
0:18:00 > 0:18:02What questions do you want to ask our deputy heads?
0:18:02 > 0:18:05You can ask them individually, you can ask them as a group,
0:18:05 > 0:18:07you can do what you like but ask away.
0:18:07 > 0:18:09What does a deputy head actually do?
0:18:09 > 0:18:12Good, very good question.
0:18:12 > 0:18:15OK, number one, what does a deputy head actually do?
0:18:15 > 0:18:17- Erm... - LAUGHTER
0:18:17 > 0:18:21Oh, come on mate, make an effort, you put a suit on special!
0:18:23 > 0:18:27Well, I think, I think the main job is to kind of delegate well.
0:18:28 > 0:18:30Number two, what does a deputy head do?
0:18:30 > 0:18:32Just general duties at the school
0:18:32 > 0:18:34and when the head's not there I'll...
0:18:34 > 0:18:37When the head's not there that's when I shine!
0:18:38 > 0:18:42The head's gone, kids! Let's wreck the place!
0:18:42 > 0:18:45Number three, what does a deputy head actually do?
0:18:45 > 0:18:48They look after their naughty children at lunchtime.
0:18:48 > 0:18:50AUDIENCE: Ooh!
0:18:50 > 0:18:52And number four, what does a deputy head actually do?
0:18:52 > 0:18:54- Admin.- Admin.
0:18:54 > 0:18:56That's all I do, admin.
0:18:56 > 0:18:58OK, we'll go over to Jenna's team.
0:18:58 > 0:19:00Any questions for our teachers?
0:19:00 > 0:19:02Can I see your most serious stare, all of you?
0:19:02 > 0:19:05Oh, yeah, let's do that. Let's go from four backwards, yeah?
0:19:05 > 0:19:08When you're really cross with a student.
0:19:08 > 0:19:09On the count of three, number four,
0:19:09 > 0:19:13I want you to go from happy to your most sinister...
0:19:13 > 0:19:16There, happy and you're sad!
0:19:16 > 0:19:18- AUDIENCE: Oh!- Oh!
0:19:18 > 0:19:20Let's go to number three.
0:19:20 > 0:19:22You're happy...
0:19:22 > 0:19:25- And you're angry.- Oh, she looks sad.
0:19:25 > 0:19:28Number two, this is going to be good.
0:19:28 > 0:19:30He's happy, he's angry.
0:19:30 > 0:19:33AUDIENCE: Oh!
0:19:33 > 0:19:35His beard got about a metre longer.
0:19:35 > 0:19:36LAUGHTER
0:19:37 > 0:19:41Finally number one, you're happy, you're angry.
0:19:43 > 0:19:46LAUGHTER
0:19:46 > 0:19:48Looks like he's wee'd himself.
0:19:50 > 0:19:52- Get them to tell you off. - I've got a question, Iain.
0:19:52 > 0:19:57- Off you go.- Given the constraints in educational budgets that teachers
0:19:57 > 0:19:59have been facing over recent years...
0:19:59 > 0:20:01What's that? No, it doesn't matter, we're out of time, Tez.
0:20:01 > 0:20:04- Oh, thank you. - LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE
0:20:04 > 0:20:07- What if I got up on this chair? - Jenna, have you got a question?
0:20:07 > 0:20:12So, if I jumped on the chair, what would your reaction be?
0:20:12 > 0:20:15There you go. I want you to imagine Jenna is jumping on the chair.
0:20:15 > 0:20:17You're going to tell her off.
0:20:17 > 0:20:20Here we go. Number four!
0:20:20 > 0:20:22- I would pick her up. - AUDIENCE GASPS
0:20:22 > 0:20:24- Pick her up.- What?
0:20:24 > 0:20:26- Whoa! - SINGS THE LION KING THEME
0:20:31 > 0:20:34Tell you what, you wouldn't jump on your chair again, Jenna.
0:20:35 > 0:20:38Tell Jenna off for jumping on her chair, number one!
0:20:38 > 0:20:41If you're defying me then you would soon know about it.
0:20:41 > 0:20:42AUDIENCE: Oh!
0:20:42 > 0:20:44Defy me?
0:20:44 > 0:20:48LOW VOICE: If you defy me you will know about it.
0:20:49 > 0:20:52Hello, is that a little child?
0:20:52 > 0:20:54You have defied me.
0:20:54 > 0:20:57I am going to send number four to come and pick you up.
0:20:57 > 0:20:59LAUGHTER
0:21:01 > 0:21:03SINGS THE LION KING THEME
0:21:03 > 0:21:07OK, Jenna's jumping on her chair, tell her off, number two!
0:21:07 > 0:21:09Jenna, I would be very disappointed in you.
0:21:09 > 0:21:12AUDIENCE: Oh!
0:21:12 > 0:21:14I'm not angry, I'm disappointed.
0:21:14 > 0:21:19When your mum says that to you, you know you're in deep soupy trouble.
0:21:19 > 0:21:22Number three, finally, Jenna's jumping on her chair, tell her off.
0:21:22 > 0:21:24Jenna, you're making me really sad right now,
0:21:24 > 0:21:26can you just get down off the chair?
0:21:26 > 0:21:28That's the most monotone...
0:21:28 > 0:21:31ROBOTIC VOICE: Jenna, you are making me feel incredibly sad right now.
0:21:33 > 0:21:37You've had your questions, audience, they're going to need your help,
0:21:37 > 0:21:40who do you think is the real teacher?
0:21:40 > 0:21:42One, two, three, or four?
0:21:42 > 0:21:44Vote now!
0:21:44 > 0:21:46AUDIENCE SHOUTS SUGGESTIONS
0:21:49 > 0:21:51OK, OK!
0:21:53 > 0:21:57Come on, guys, better shush. It's your own time you're wasting.
0:21:58 > 0:22:01OK, Josh, you're up first.
0:22:01 > 0:22:04Who do you think's lied and who's about to get pied?
0:22:04 > 0:22:06It's time for you to Pie The Supply.
0:22:06 > 0:22:08Pie The Supply!
0:22:08 > 0:22:10On you go, Josh,
0:22:10 > 0:22:14gently place the pie into the face of the person
0:22:14 > 0:22:17you think is the deputy head teacher.
0:22:17 > 0:22:19Nice and gently.
0:22:19 > 0:22:22Into the face, gently, gently.
0:22:22 > 0:22:23AUDIENCE: Oh!
0:22:26 > 0:22:28CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:22:30 > 0:22:32It's stuck!
0:22:38 > 0:22:40We've had the first pie stick of the series.
0:22:42 > 0:22:43Right, go and sit down, Josh.
0:22:43 > 0:22:46So, you're welcome, number two.
0:22:46 > 0:22:47OK, Jenna?
0:22:47 > 0:22:49Please go and Pie The Supply.
0:22:49 > 0:22:51Pie The Supply!
0:22:52 > 0:22:56Go on Jenna, gently place that pie into the face
0:22:56 > 0:23:00of the person you think is the deputy head teacher.
0:23:00 > 0:23:02Go on, Jenna, nice and gently.
0:23:02 > 0:23:04Place the pie into the face.
0:23:04 > 0:23:06AUDIENCE: Ooh!
0:23:06 > 0:23:08GASPS AND APPLAUSE
0:23:18 > 0:23:20OK, let's find out,
0:23:20 > 0:23:24would the real deputy head teacher please step forward?
0:23:28 > 0:23:30CHEERING Yay!
0:23:36 > 0:23:41Oh! That means the gold star goes to Jenna's team!
0:23:41 > 0:23:43APPLAUSE
0:23:45 > 0:23:49OK guys, time now to play the... LAUGHTER
0:23:51 > 0:23:53Time... Time now...
0:23:53 > 0:23:55For, time now for spelling...
0:23:55 > 0:23:57Spelling Bees.
0:23:58 > 0:24:01Spelling Bees!
0:24:01 > 0:24:03Go get changed, go get changed.
0:24:05 > 0:24:09Team captains, you're the beekeepers so Josh,
0:24:09 > 0:24:11who do you want to be your bee?
0:24:11 > 0:24:14- I choose Bec.- OK, lovely stuff.
0:24:14 > 0:24:16- And Jenna.- Naomi.- Naomi!
0:24:16 > 0:24:22OK, in that case it's Bec against Naomi - let's get ready to bumble!
0:24:22 > 0:24:24CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:24:26 > 0:24:29OK, guys, I'll shout out words and all our two teams need to do
0:24:29 > 0:24:32is grab the letters to spell out those words.
0:24:32 > 0:24:36The team who spells the most correct words at the end are our winners.
0:24:36 > 0:24:41- So, beekeepers, are you both ready? - Yep.- OK, bees, are you ready?
0:24:41 > 0:24:44- Yeah.- Your time starts on your first word and the first word you're
0:24:44 > 0:24:47looking for is, Naomi!
0:24:47 > 0:24:49SHOUTS OF ENCOURAGEMENT
0:24:49 > 0:24:52- Come on, Naomi! Come on!- Get it in! Get it in! Get it in! Get it in.
0:24:52 > 0:24:55Get it in. Naomi! Oh! Oh!
0:24:56 > 0:24:59Get it in! Aargh! Oh!
0:24:59 > 0:25:00Get it in. Come on, Naomi!
0:25:00 > 0:25:03You're stronger.
0:25:03 > 0:25:05- Ah! Naomi's down!- Come on! - Come on, Naomi!
0:25:07 > 0:25:09This is a health and safety nightmare.
0:25:11 > 0:25:13OK, Naomi, the next one is Loves.
0:25:13 > 0:25:15Loves, next. Loves.
0:25:15 > 0:25:17- What?- Loves. SHOUTS OF ENCOURAGEMENT
0:25:17 > 0:25:20You've got it, you've got it, we've got one, we've got one!
0:25:20 > 0:25:21Loves.
0:25:21 > 0:25:23Start spelling, Jack.
0:25:24 > 0:25:26Loves. We want Loves next, mate. Loves.
0:25:26 > 0:25:27- Loves.- Right.
0:25:27 > 0:25:31Loves. Come on. Come on!
0:25:31 > 0:25:33Get in that circle.
0:25:33 > 0:25:35SHOUTS OF ENCOURAGEMENT
0:25:37 > 0:25:38- Yes! Yes! Come on!- Aah!
0:25:41 > 0:25:45Loves. We need Loves. We need Loves.
0:25:45 > 0:25:47Nature. The final word is Nature.
0:25:47 > 0:25:50You can do it, Naomi.
0:25:50 > 0:25:51BELL RINGS
0:25:51 > 0:25:54Times up, stop, stop, stop!
0:25:54 > 0:25:56Stop, stop.
0:25:56 > 0:25:58It's all over. Naomi, how do you feel?
0:25:58 > 0:26:01How do you feel, Naomi? NAOMI PANTS
0:26:02 > 0:26:06Pretty hard, this game. Pretty difficult.
0:26:06 > 0:26:08Jack? I've been told you put the V in after time.
0:26:08 > 0:26:10Get rid of that V.
0:26:10 > 0:26:12Did I? Did I do it after...
0:26:12 > 0:26:14Mate, put it down.
0:26:14 > 0:26:17- I wonder where...- So "Naomi loes".
0:26:18 > 0:26:20- And you got "Naomi love".- Ah.
0:26:22 > 0:26:25It's supposed to be "loves", which means you both got Naomi.
0:26:25 > 0:26:29So you both got one each which means both teams get a gold star!
0:26:29 > 0:26:32CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:26:35 > 0:26:40And that's just about it, all we can do now is add up the stars.
0:26:40 > 0:26:42AUDIENCE: Ooh!
0:26:47 > 0:26:49And the winners are...
0:26:50 > 0:26:53..Jenna's team! CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:26:55 > 0:26:57Well done, Jenna's team, you are the winners.
0:26:57 > 0:27:00Unfortunately, Josh, not only does the dog eat your homework
0:27:00 > 0:27:02but you have to spend detention with Mr Smash.
0:27:02 > 0:27:06It's time to take the walk of shame.
0:27:06 > 0:27:08# La, la, la, la-la-la, la la Losers!
0:27:08 > 0:27:10# La, la, la, la-la-la, la la Losers!
0:27:10 > 0:27:12# La, la, la, la-la-la, la la Losers!
0:27:12 > 0:27:14# La, la, la, la-la-la, la la Losers!
0:27:14 > 0:27:16# La, la, la, la-la-la, la la Losers!
0:27:16 > 0:27:18# Losers! #
0:27:18 > 0:27:20So that's your lot.
0:27:20 > 0:27:23As ever, we probably didn't learn much but it was fun trying.
0:27:23 > 0:27:26See you next time on...
0:27:26 > 0:27:29AUDIENCE: The Dog Ate My Homework!
0:27:29 > 0:27:31Sees ya!
0:27:31 > 0:27:32CHEERING AND APPLAUSE