0:00:02 > 0:00:05CHEERING
0:00:13 > 0:00:15CHEERING
0:00:15 > 0:00:17Argh!
0:00:17 > 0:00:19BELL RINGS
0:00:57 > 0:01:00I'm Iain Stirling, and welcome to The Dog Ate My Homework,
0:01:00 > 0:01:03a show that promises to be an emotional journey
0:01:03 > 0:01:06when the teams realise we've run out of biscuits.
0:01:06 > 0:01:08It's a cookie catastrophe!
0:01:08 > 0:01:10LAUGHTER
0:01:10 > 0:01:12Enough about the biscuits shortage.
0:01:12 > 0:01:14Let's take the register. On my right, a girl
0:01:14 > 0:01:18whose great-great-great-great-great- great-grandad invented the ruler.
0:01:18 > 0:01:20And five seconds later, she tested the flex,
0:01:20 > 0:01:23and then invented the first broken ruler.
0:01:23 > 0:01:25It's Avril.
0:01:25 > 0:01:26Here, sir.
0:01:26 > 0:01:30And on Avril's team, a comedian and presenter on All Over The Place,
0:01:30 > 0:01:33who's been making people laugh all over the world.
0:01:33 > 0:01:34But in her defence,
0:01:34 > 0:01:37I think that her passport photo's not even that bad.
0:01:37 > 0:01:42- It's Victoria Cook! - Here, sir!
0:01:42 > 0:01:46And also on Avril's team, a presenter on Down On The Farm.
0:01:46 > 0:01:49Yes, he went from X Factor to a tractor.
0:01:49 > 0:01:52And now I know who's dragged in all that mud.
0:01:52 > 0:01:54HE GRUMBLES
0:01:54 > 0:01:56It's JB.
0:01:56 > 0:01:57Yes, sir.
0:01:57 > 0:01:59And on my left,
0:01:59 > 0:02:04a girl whose school recently voted for their top 100 TV presenters.
0:02:04 > 0:02:06Let's see where I come on the list.
0:02:06 > 0:02:07Here we go, look at this.
0:02:14 > 0:02:15I'm not on the list!
0:02:17 > 0:02:18No gold stars for you.
0:02:19 > 0:02:21Only joking, it's Polly.
0:02:21 > 0:02:24Here, sir.
0:02:24 > 0:02:28And on Polly's team, JB's co-presenter on Down On The Farm.
0:02:28 > 0:02:29And today,
0:02:29 > 0:02:32the wellies are off in this battle of the barnyard.
0:02:32 > 0:02:34It could be FARM-ageddon.
0:02:34 > 0:02:36But, please, no mud fights.
0:02:36 > 0:02:39- It's Storm Huntley.- Here, sir.
0:02:39 > 0:02:41Also on Polly's team,
0:02:41 > 0:02:44an impressionist known as the man of a thousand voices.
0:02:44 > 0:02:45I'd ask him to impersonate me,
0:02:45 > 0:02:48but then he'd be the man of 1,001 voices.
0:02:48 > 0:02:52Doesn't quite have the same ring to it, it's Luke Kempner.
0:02:52 > 0:02:57- Here, sir. - Can we please applaud both teams.
0:02:57 > 0:02:59CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:03:03 > 0:03:08So, given that we're all here, let's play for my precious golden stars.
0:03:08 > 0:03:10- AUDIENCE:- Ooooh!
0:03:10 > 0:03:13I'll award bonus stars to anyone who's so clever
0:03:13 > 0:03:15their brain explodes.
0:03:15 > 0:03:17Not literally, that would be disgusting.
0:03:17 > 0:03:19But be warned, push your luck too far,
0:03:19 > 0:03:22and I'll take those golden stars away.
0:03:22 > 0:03:23Get... AUDIENCE: Awww!
0:03:23 > 0:03:26Hey! It's Iain's school, so it's...
0:03:26 > 0:03:28- AUDIENCE:- Iain's rules.
0:03:28 > 0:03:30Yes, it is. The team with the most stars
0:03:30 > 0:03:31at the end of the show are our winners,
0:03:31 > 0:03:33while the losers face detention
0:03:33 > 0:03:37with a man more unpleasant than the dog's poo bag.
0:03:37 > 0:03:39FLY BUZZES
0:03:39 > 0:03:41It's Mr Smash.
0:03:41 > 0:03:43- AUDIENCE:- Boo!
0:03:43 > 0:03:44PLATE CRASHES
0:03:44 > 0:03:46MR SMASH GRUMBLES
0:03:46 > 0:03:49You learning to spin plates, Smashie?
0:03:49 > 0:03:51PLATE CRASHES
0:03:51 > 0:03:54Oh! Da, da-da, da, da.
0:03:55 > 0:03:58Ah! Ha-ha-ha-ha!
0:03:58 > 0:04:02Ha-ha-ha-ha!
0:04:02 > 0:04:03Ha!
0:04:03 > 0:04:04RECORD SCRATCHES
0:04:04 > 0:04:08MUSIC PLAYS
0:04:10 > 0:04:12Ha-ha-ha, ha, ha!
0:04:12 > 0:04:14MUSIC STOPS
0:04:14 > 0:04:16I have no idea what just happened there.
0:04:17 > 0:04:20No-one spins them quite like DJ Smash.
0:04:20 > 0:04:23Let's get on with the show.
0:04:23 > 0:04:25CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:04:28 > 0:04:30Time now for Stick To The Point.
0:04:30 > 0:04:32- ANNOUNCER:- Stick To The Point.
0:04:32 > 0:04:34I'll ask questions. If our teams are too slow,
0:04:34 > 0:04:36repeat an answer or just talk rubbish,
0:04:36 > 0:04:38then I'll put them in the shush position.
0:04:38 > 0:04:41Can I see your shush positions, please, everyone?
0:04:41 > 0:04:44Fantastic. Strong work by you all.
0:04:44 > 0:04:47But first, I need my stick of pointiness.
0:04:47 > 0:04:49Ha-ha-ha-ha! Ha-ha-ha-ha!
0:04:51 > 0:04:52Ha-ha!
0:04:52 > 0:04:53A-ha!
0:04:53 > 0:04:56LAUGHTER
0:04:56 > 0:04:59That's a stick of celery, mate.
0:04:59 > 0:05:01Ha-ha-ha-ha!
0:05:01 > 0:05:03Ha-ha-ha!
0:05:03 > 0:05:04LAUGHTER
0:05:07 > 0:05:10This is what I'm after. My rhyme-time stick.
0:05:10 > 0:05:11That's a stick of dynamite, big man.
0:05:14 > 0:05:16Argh!
0:05:16 > 0:05:18Yeah, just don't drop it.
0:05:18 > 0:05:19Whatever you do, don't drop it.
0:05:19 > 0:05:22EXPLOSION
0:05:25 > 0:05:27He'll be fine.
0:05:27 > 0:05:28LAUGHTER
0:05:28 > 0:05:30He'll be fine.
0:05:30 > 0:05:32Ladies and gentlemen, it is the rhyme-time stick.
0:05:32 > 0:05:34- ANNOUNCER:- Rhyme Time.
0:05:34 > 0:05:38Right, the last one speaking wins, and all these words need to rhyme.
0:05:38 > 0:05:40The first topic,
0:05:40 > 0:05:43I'm looking for things that rhyme with the word stay.
0:05:43 > 0:05:45- JB.- Play.
0:05:45 > 0:05:47Nice. Luke.
0:05:47 > 0:05:49Iain, you are my bae.
0:05:49 > 0:05:50Whoa!
0:05:50 > 0:05:52A bit creepy.
0:05:52 > 0:05:56- Victoria.- Iain, you make us want to run away.
0:05:58 > 0:06:00Evil. Polly.
0:06:00 > 0:06:03- Day.- Yes! JB.
0:06:03 > 0:06:05- Ray....- Yes!- ..of sunshine.
0:06:07 > 0:06:09- Polly.- My birthday is in May.
0:06:09 > 0:06:10Yes, it is.
0:06:10 > 0:06:12- Victoria.- Howay!
0:06:12 > 0:06:14Yes. She is from Newcastle
0:06:14 > 0:06:17and will shamelessly reference it throughout the show.
0:06:17 > 0:06:19Luke.
0:06:19 > 0:06:21Santa rides on a sleigh.
0:06:21 > 0:06:23On a Ferrari, because he's had a payday.
0:06:23 > 0:06:25LAUGHTER
0:06:25 > 0:06:26JB.
0:06:26 > 0:06:28When's it time to go on vac-a-tion.
0:06:31 > 0:06:34- Whit?!- Vac-AY-tion.
0:06:34 > 0:06:37- Vac-AT-...- Yeah. - ..tion.- Yeah.
0:06:37 > 0:06:39That's not how rhyming works.
0:06:39 > 0:06:41Shush position, please, JB.
0:06:41 > 0:06:44- Storm.- Down on the farm, there's lots of hay?
0:06:44 > 0:06:47- There is. Victoria.- Hey, do you like my tan?
0:06:47 > 0:06:49I've been to St Tropez.
0:06:49 > 0:06:51Lovely stuff.
0:06:51 > 0:06:52- Polly.- Slay.
0:06:52 > 0:06:55- You've had it already. - No, but another type of sleigh.
0:06:55 > 0:06:57- What type?- Slay.- Oh!
0:07:04 > 0:07:06Bonus gold star.
0:07:06 > 0:07:08- AUDIENCE:- Ooooh!
0:07:08 > 0:07:09Victoria.
0:07:09 > 0:07:13Oh, I'm going to buy some new earrings because it's payday.
0:07:13 > 0:07:16- I'll give that. Polly! - Today is a good day.
0:07:16 > 0:07:19- Have we had "day"? - Yeah, but "today".
0:07:20 > 0:07:22Payday followed by today.
0:07:22 > 0:07:24I'm going to throw it to the audience.
0:07:24 > 0:07:25Shush position, yes or no?
0:07:25 > 0:07:27- AUDIENCE:- Yes!
0:07:27 > 0:07:30They all said yes to a child.
0:07:30 > 0:07:32Harsh. Shush position, Polly.
0:07:32 > 0:07:33Victoria!
0:07:33 > 0:07:34Wahay!
0:07:34 > 0:07:38That's too similar to the other one you said, shush position.
0:07:38 > 0:07:40And don't speak Geordie - I don't speak it!
0:07:42 > 0:07:44- Storm?- Betray?
0:07:44 > 0:07:46Betray, ooh! Someone went to school.
0:07:47 > 0:07:50Avril? Shush position.
0:07:50 > 0:07:52Points go to Polly's team.
0:07:52 > 0:07:54CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:07:56 > 0:07:59Next one, things that rhyme with pies, pies.
0:07:59 > 0:08:00- Storm.- Flies.
0:08:00 > 0:08:02Lovely stuff. Victoria.
0:08:02 > 0:08:03Why-ayes!
0:08:03 > 0:08:07HE LAUGHS
0:08:07 > 0:08:08- Luke!- Bad guys.
0:08:08 > 0:08:10Yes, please. JB.
0:08:10 > 0:08:12Some would say you're rather wise.
0:08:12 > 0:08:14No, they haven't.
0:08:14 > 0:08:15LAUGHTER
0:08:15 > 0:08:16- Polly.- Lies.
0:08:16 > 0:08:19Exactly. A bit harsh.
0:08:19 > 0:08:21Avril.
0:08:21 > 0:08:23I don't know.
0:08:23 > 0:08:25I'm actually bored now so...
0:08:25 > 0:08:28- Storm.- When you go to school, sometimes you have to wear ties.
0:08:28 > 0:08:31Yes, you do. Victoria.
0:08:31 > 0:08:33My auntie is called Glad-eyes.
0:08:33 > 0:08:35LAUGHTER
0:08:36 > 0:08:38No!
0:08:38 > 0:08:40Gladys... OK.
0:08:40 > 0:08:42Oi!
0:08:42 > 0:08:44It's Iain's school so it's...
0:08:44 > 0:08:46- AUDIENCE:- Iain's rules.
0:08:46 > 0:08:48- Luke.- I apologise.
0:08:48 > 0:08:51Nice one, so should this lot over there.
0:08:51 > 0:08:52Question my authority... JB?
0:08:52 > 0:08:54It's time for a surprise.
0:08:54 > 0:08:56Nice. Luke.
0:08:56 > 0:09:00- AUSTRALIAN ACCENT:- When I was in Australia, I got lost in a "meyes".
0:09:01 > 0:09:04In a "meyes"!
0:09:04 > 0:09:06Say pies.
0:09:06 > 0:09:08- Pies!- Say maze.
0:09:08 > 0:09:10Meyes.
0:09:11 > 0:09:14- Shush position. VOICE FROM AUDIENCE:- No!
0:09:14 > 0:09:15What? Whit?!
0:09:17 > 0:09:19Who said that? Who said that?!
0:09:20 > 0:09:21Shush position,
0:09:21 > 0:09:24shush position, shush position.
0:09:24 > 0:09:25Stop putting your hands up!
0:09:28 > 0:09:32If anyone messes with me again, I'll slay.
0:09:32 > 0:09:33LAUGHTER
0:09:35 > 0:09:38- JB?- I don't think I'm going to get too many more tries.
0:09:38 > 0:09:40Storm!
0:09:40 > 0:09:42We should win a prize.
0:09:42 > 0:09:43This is taking ages.
0:09:43 > 0:09:47- JB?- I'm a musician, I'm ready for the reprise.
0:09:47 > 0:09:48Don't know what that means.
0:09:48 > 0:09:50Polly?
0:09:51 > 0:09:52Shush position.
0:09:52 > 0:09:54It is Farmageddon.
0:09:55 > 0:10:01JB versus Storm, normally they're on CBeebies, today, CBBC,
0:10:01 > 0:10:05and they're going to destroy one another!
0:10:05 > 0:10:06JB?
0:10:08 > 0:10:10Points go to Polly's team!
0:10:14 > 0:10:17- ANNOUNCER:- School disco!
0:10:17 > 0:10:18School disco!
0:10:18 > 0:10:19# You know you're only in it
0:10:19 > 0:10:22# Cos it's hot right now Hot right now
0:10:22 > 0:10:23# Turn it up right now
0:10:23 > 0:10:25# Put your hands in the air
0:10:25 > 0:10:26# If you want it right now
0:10:26 > 0:10:29# Eh-oh, eh-oh, hot right now
0:10:29 > 0:10:31# You know you're only in it
0:10:31 > 0:10:33# Cos it's hot right now Hot right now
0:10:33 > 0:10:34# Turn it up right now. #
0:10:34 > 0:10:35MUSIC STOPS
0:10:35 > 0:10:38BELL RINGS
0:10:38 > 0:10:41At the end of that round I can tell you, the gold star goes to...
0:10:43 > 0:10:45Polly's team!
0:10:45 > 0:10:47CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:10:51 > 0:10:55OK, guys, time for my favourite thing in the whole wide world.
0:10:55 > 0:10:57It's time for Pie The Supply!
0:10:57 > 0:10:59- ANNOUNCER:- Pie The Supply!
0:10:59 > 0:11:03We're about to meet four people all claiming to be real teachers
0:11:03 > 0:11:05but only one is telling the truth.
0:11:05 > 0:11:07The other three, well, they need to take
0:11:07 > 0:11:09a good, long, hard look at themselves.
0:11:09 > 0:11:13Our teams have to pie who they think is the real teacher,
0:11:13 > 0:11:16and if both teams fail to pie the teacher,
0:11:16 > 0:11:19then there will be consequences!
0:11:19 > 0:11:20- AUDIENCE:- Ooooh!
0:11:20 > 0:11:22You'd better believe it.
0:11:22 > 0:11:25And today, they are all English teachers.
0:11:25 > 0:11:30We have Ms Ross, Mr Smith,
0:11:30 > 0:11:34Mr Brennan, Miss Scougall.
0:11:34 > 0:11:35Guys, Avril's team.
0:11:35 > 0:11:37All I want from you at the minute, first impressions.
0:11:37 > 0:11:39I think number one and number four
0:11:39 > 0:11:42because they just kind of have that, "Oh, you look like a teacher."
0:11:42 > 0:11:46That cardigan's got teacher written all over it, doesn't it?
0:11:46 > 0:11:48- JB?- I'm going to say two.
0:11:48 > 0:11:51- Number two.- Two?- Mr Smith.
0:11:51 > 0:11:53I don't think, Mr Smith doesn't look like an English teacher,
0:11:53 > 0:11:55he looks like a James Bond film,
0:11:55 > 0:11:57just like the scientist that's made to work against his will.
0:11:57 > 0:11:59LAUGHTER
0:11:59 > 0:12:02OK, Polly...
0:12:02 > 0:12:04just first impressions, look at them. Who are you thinking?
0:12:04 > 0:12:06One, two, three, or four?
0:12:06 > 0:12:08Number two just screams teacher to me because...
0:12:08 > 0:12:10Whispers it - he's a very good teacher.
0:12:10 > 0:12:14He stands like this and this is how teachers stand in assembly.
0:12:14 > 0:12:16Like this.
0:12:16 > 0:12:19Three has the shiniest shoes, I think I have to go for three.
0:12:19 > 0:12:22Oh, shiny shoes number three, someone's happening.
0:12:24 > 0:12:25Right, let's delve deeper, Avril's team.
0:12:25 > 0:12:27Do you want to ask the guys anything?
0:12:27 > 0:12:29So The Canterbury Tales...
0:12:29 > 0:12:30Oh!
0:12:30 > 0:12:33- By which author? Can I ask them all?- Yeah.
0:12:33 > 0:12:36Do you know what, how about you can do it all at the same time,
0:12:36 > 0:12:38but do it in, like, boyband fashion.
0:12:38 > 0:12:40- Yeah.- Right, teachers, just don't let me down,
0:12:40 > 0:12:43this is going to be funny, this, I can feel it.
0:12:43 > 0:12:45On the count of three. Step forward and tell us
0:12:45 > 0:12:46who wrote The Canterbury Tales.
0:12:46 > 0:12:48One, two, three!
0:12:48 > 0:12:49- ALL:- Chaucer!
0:12:52 > 0:12:53That was good!
0:12:53 > 0:12:55It was Chaucer.
0:12:55 > 0:12:58Polly's team, have you got any questions for our teachers?
0:12:58 > 0:13:02So I talked a lot in class, I got in trouble all the time for talking,
0:13:02 > 0:13:05what would you do to stop me from talking in class?
0:13:05 > 0:13:06That's amazing, like, you three,
0:13:06 > 0:13:09what's it called at the end of the show when you pretend to talk?
0:13:09 > 0:13:13- Oh, rhubarb.- Rhubarb, start, you three start rhubarb-ing.
0:13:13 > 0:13:16We'll start with number three, go!
0:13:16 > 0:13:19Do you want to share it with all of us?
0:13:19 > 0:13:22Come on now, tell us all what you're talking about.
0:13:22 > 0:13:24No, too nice and weirdly inquisitive.
0:13:24 > 0:13:25LAUGHTER
0:13:25 > 0:13:28You sound like, "Can I be in your gang?"
0:13:28 > 0:13:30It was weird.
0:13:30 > 0:13:32Number one. Go.
0:13:32 > 0:13:33Do you guys want a warning first
0:13:33 > 0:13:36or do you want to find yourself outside the door?
0:13:36 > 0:13:38- AUDIENCE:- Oh!
0:13:38 > 0:13:42Oh! See? Number one just slayed.
0:13:42 > 0:13:44LAUGHTER
0:13:44 > 0:13:47OK, number four, in your own time.
0:13:47 > 0:13:50Break it up now or you'll end up in the principal's office.
0:13:52 > 0:13:53This is taking me back.
0:13:55 > 0:13:57Final time. Number two.
0:13:57 > 0:13:59You three! Quiet!
0:13:59 > 0:14:01- AUDIENCE:- Oh!
0:14:01 > 0:14:03APPLAUSE
0:14:05 > 0:14:07OK, this is as much your show as everyone else's, guys,
0:14:07 > 0:14:08so who do you think it is?
0:14:08 > 0:14:10One, two, three, or four, help these guys out?!
0:14:10 > 0:14:13- AUDIENCE:- Two!
0:14:15 > 0:14:18It's time to find out who's lying and who's about to get pied.
0:14:18 > 0:14:21So, Avril, you're up first, it's time to pie the supply.
0:14:21 > 0:14:23- ANNOUNCER:- Pie The Supply!
0:14:23 > 0:14:27Nice and gently, Avril, get that pie in their face.
0:14:28 > 0:14:33Place it in their face, Avril, place it in their face.
0:14:33 > 0:14:36CHEERING
0:14:36 > 0:14:40No!
0:14:40 > 0:14:41Oh!
0:14:41 > 0:14:43It was brutal!
0:14:43 > 0:14:47Number one suffered friendly fire!
0:14:47 > 0:14:49LAUGHTER
0:14:49 > 0:14:52Polly, you're up next, it's time to pie the supply!
0:14:52 > 0:14:55- ANNOUNCER:- Pie The Supply!
0:14:55 > 0:14:58OK, Polly! Who do you think the teacher is?
0:14:58 > 0:15:00Number two's still reeling.
0:15:03 > 0:15:04Nice and gently, place the pie!
0:15:04 > 0:15:06Oh!
0:15:06 > 0:15:08APPLAUSE
0:15:14 > 0:15:17I've been told to tell the audience, the bases are soft.
0:15:19 > 0:15:20Really sorry, Number Three.
0:15:21 > 0:15:23Right, let's find out,
0:15:23 > 0:15:26would the real supply teacher please step forward?
0:15:29 > 0:15:33CHEERING
0:15:33 > 0:15:36The real teacher was correctly identified,
0:15:36 > 0:15:39which means the gold star goes to...
0:15:39 > 0:15:40Avril's team!
0:15:40 > 0:15:42CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:15:46 > 0:15:49General knowledge now, with Watch Your Mouth!
0:15:49 > 0:15:51- ANNOUNCER:- Watch Your Mouth!
0:15:51 > 0:15:53It's Mr Smash's favourite round.
0:15:53 > 0:15:58And he's so excited, it looks like he's got ants in his pants.
0:15:58 > 0:16:02What's that? He actually HAS ants in his pants?
0:16:02 > 0:16:04Argh! Argh! Ay!
0:16:04 > 0:16:06He's got ants in his pants,
0:16:06 > 0:16:09but this is where our teams have to try and talk properly
0:16:09 > 0:16:12with one of these stuck right in their pie holes.
0:16:12 > 0:16:16It is a Mr Smash Growl Maker.
0:16:16 > 0:16:21So, teams, can you please introduce the Growl Maker to your face?
0:16:21 > 0:16:23Pop them in your moosh. Finger on buzzers,
0:16:23 > 0:16:25anyone from your team can buzz in,
0:16:25 > 0:16:28and the first question is, "To infinity and beyond"
0:16:28 > 0:16:31is the catchphrase of which fictional toy astronaut?
0:16:31 > 0:16:32But anyone can buzz again.
0:16:32 > 0:16:35- Polly.- Buzz Lightyear.- Buzz Lightyear. And for a bonus point,
0:16:35 > 0:16:37can you do your best Buzz Lightyear impressions?
0:16:37 > 0:16:39We'll start with you, Storm.
0:16:39 > 0:16:42To infinity and yond!
0:16:42 > 0:16:44A bit creepy! Polly?
0:16:44 > 0:16:46Tny uh!
0:16:46 > 0:16:50Ah, ah-ah, ah-ah, ah-ah! In Morse code.
0:16:50 > 0:16:54And finally a professional impressionist, Luke Kempner.
0:16:54 > 0:16:58To inchinity and beyond!
0:16:58 > 0:17:01Lovely stuff, correct.
0:17:01 > 0:17:03Fingers on buzzers.
0:17:03 > 0:17:07What is the name of a person whose job is to plan and design buildings?
0:17:07 > 0:17:09- Avril!- Yes, Avril's team?
0:17:09 > 0:17:11An architect?
0:17:11 > 0:17:15Is correct! For a bonus points, name three famous buildings.
0:17:15 > 0:17:18- JB? One, please. - Leaning Tower of Pisa.
0:17:18 > 0:17:22Leaning Tower of Pisa is quite famous bad architecture, though.
0:17:22 > 0:17:23Avril?
0:17:23 > 0:17:24Big Ben?
0:17:24 > 0:17:28Big Ben? Not the building, it's actually the name of the bell.
0:17:28 > 0:17:30It's called Big Ben. I'm giving you it.
0:17:30 > 0:17:31Victoria?
0:17:31 > 0:17:33- MUMBLES:- The Tyne Bridge.
0:17:33 > 0:17:35Not a word of it, no points.
0:17:35 > 0:17:37LAUGHTER
0:17:37 > 0:17:38Next, finger on buzzers,
0:17:38 > 0:17:42what natural material shorn from sheep can be used to make...
0:17:42 > 0:17:44- Avril!- Yes! Avril's team.
0:17:44 > 0:17:46- MUMBLES:- Uhl.
0:17:46 > 0:17:48Not a word, we'll have to hand it over.
0:17:48 > 0:17:50Polly's team.
0:17:50 > 0:17:51Wool.
0:17:51 > 0:17:53Wool is correct!
0:17:53 > 0:17:55OK, fingers on buzzers.
0:17:55 > 0:17:58If I was wearing an eye patch, had a wooden leg...
0:17:58 > 0:18:00- Polly!- Yes, Polly's Team.
0:18:00 > 0:18:02Pirates.
0:18:02 > 0:18:03Pirate! Correct.
0:18:03 > 0:18:07For a bonus point, Polly, your best pirate impression.
0:18:07 > 0:18:08Ar!
0:18:08 > 0:18:10LAUGHTER
0:18:12 > 0:18:16Fingers on buzzers. What is Ireland's national flower?
0:18:16 > 0:18:17- Polly!- Polly's team.
0:18:17 > 0:18:19Shamrock.
0:18:19 > 0:18:24Is correct. And for a bonus point, your best Irish accent, Storm!
0:18:24 > 0:18:26Dardy-dar-dar-dar.
0:18:26 > 0:18:29LAUGHTER
0:18:29 > 0:18:32Ho! Lardy-hirdy bardy bur.
0:18:32 > 0:18:34- Polly?- Leprechauns.
0:18:34 > 0:18:37Leprechauns, saying things now.
0:18:37 > 0:18:39And finally, professional impressionist, Luke!
0:18:39 > 0:18:42- MUMBLES:- That thing you're saying is outrageous, so it is.
0:18:42 > 0:18:46LAUGHTER
0:18:46 > 0:18:49CHEERING
0:18:49 > 0:18:53OK, in what season would you commonly expect snow,
0:18:53 > 0:18:55ice and freezing temperatures?
0:18:55 > 0:18:57- Avril!- Yes?- Winter.
0:18:57 > 0:19:02Correct. For a bonus point, can one of you blow the snowflakes
0:19:02 > 0:19:04off of my hands? JB?
0:19:07 > 0:19:09CHEERING
0:19:09 > 0:19:12BELL RINGS
0:19:12 > 0:19:13Oh, that is the end of the round,
0:19:13 > 0:19:15and at the end of that round, I can tell you
0:19:15 > 0:19:17the gold star goes to...
0:19:19 > 0:19:21Polly's team!
0:19:21 > 0:19:23CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:19:27 > 0:19:30Time now for High School Dropout.
0:19:30 > 0:19:32- ANNOUNCER:- High School Dropout!
0:19:32 > 0:19:35In a moment, two intrepid guests
0:19:35 > 0:19:38will scale to the dizzy heights of this,
0:19:38 > 0:19:40The Dog Ate My Homework drop zone!
0:19:43 > 0:19:45- AUDIENCE:- Ooooh!
0:19:45 > 0:19:48Standing atop of our school bins,
0:19:48 > 0:19:49the chosen guests have to answer
0:19:49 > 0:19:52punishing general knowledge questions.
0:19:52 > 0:19:57Get three wrong in a row And in the bin you will go
0:19:57 > 0:20:02I will say it really slow It's a poem, don't you know?
0:20:02 > 0:20:04CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:20:05 > 0:20:07Thank you.
0:20:07 > 0:20:12Avril, who do you want to see from your team stood on top of a bin?
0:20:12 > 0:20:14I'm going to send Victoria.
0:20:14 > 0:20:16- AUDIENCE:- Oooh.
0:20:17 > 0:20:20You have picked the lady that hasn't got an answer yet today.
0:20:22 > 0:20:24- Polly!- Luke.- Oh!
0:20:26 > 0:20:29OK, it's Luke versus Victoria.
0:20:29 > 0:20:32It's time for you both to take your positions on the drop zone!
0:20:36 > 0:20:37OK, remember, guys,
0:20:37 > 0:20:40the first person to get three questions wrong is binned.
0:20:40 > 0:20:43What I'll do, Luke, is I'll get the button here and I'll just go...
0:20:44 > 0:20:48I'm winding you up. OK, first question is for Avril's team.
0:20:48 > 0:20:50So, Vic.
0:20:50 > 0:20:52Yep.
0:20:52 > 0:20:55Papua New Guinea is the most linguistically diverse place
0:20:55 > 0:21:01on earth, but how many languages are estimated to be spoken there?
0:21:07 > 0:21:09What do you think?
0:21:09 > 0:21:15Personally, I'm thinking in the 700s because seven is my lucky number.
0:21:15 > 0:21:16Mine too!
0:21:17 > 0:21:19I think it may be eight
0:21:19 > 0:21:21because people would think,
0:21:21 > 0:21:24- "Oh, obviously it would be the shorter number."- Yeah.
0:21:24 > 0:21:26So are you going to go with the adults
0:21:26 > 0:21:29or are you going to go with the team captain?
0:21:29 > 0:21:34All right, I mean, to be fair, Avril, you are a canny, clever lass.
0:21:34 > 0:21:38That means very clever girl, Avril.
0:21:38 > 0:21:39But I'm going to go with JB.
0:21:39 > 0:21:41Oh!
0:21:41 > 0:21:45I can tell you the correct answer is...
0:21:45 > 0:21:46820!
0:21:46 > 0:21:49- No!- Avril was right.
0:21:49 > 0:21:54You go to amber, two questions away from the drop.
0:21:54 > 0:21:58What type of animal, Luke, is a dugite?
0:21:58 > 0:21:59- A dugite?- A dog.
0:21:59 > 0:22:00A dog?
0:22:01 > 0:22:04- That's a dog-ite.- A dog-ite?
0:22:04 > 0:22:06What type of animal is a dugite?
0:22:06 > 0:22:08A snake or a mole?
0:22:08 > 0:22:10Moles dig holes.
0:22:10 > 0:22:13Moles dig holes, that's a lovely rhyme.
0:22:13 > 0:22:15Moles dig holes, what was it, a snake?
0:22:15 > 0:22:17- Snake.- They're not doing any dugging, are they?
0:22:17 > 0:22:19- No.- No.- No.
0:22:19 > 0:22:20So I reckon mole.
0:22:20 > 0:22:24- Not snake?- Not snake - mole!
0:22:24 > 0:22:26The correct answer is snake!
0:22:28 > 0:22:30You go to amber, Luke Kempner.
0:22:30 > 0:22:31Vic.
0:22:44 > 0:22:46Come on!
0:22:46 > 0:22:47I feel like it was 20.
0:22:47 > 0:22:49What do you think, Avril?
0:22:49 > 0:22:50I think I'm going to go 20.
0:22:50 > 0:22:52OK, they're both going to go with 20.
0:22:52 > 0:22:54- What are you going to go with? - I'm going to go with 20!
0:22:54 > 0:22:59OK, so last time you shunned your team captain and got it wrong.
0:22:59 > 0:23:01This time you've gone with your team captain...
0:23:02 > 0:23:04It's 21p, you've got it wrong!
0:23:06 > 0:23:09Luke Kempner.
0:23:15 > 0:23:17Do you think it would be easier to knit a scarf while running
0:23:17 > 0:23:20- than juggling?- Yeah, definitely. - I feel like it would be.
0:23:20 > 0:23:22I think you could, I mean, like, my nan,
0:23:22 > 0:23:25she can knit stuff while she's watching Countdown.
0:23:25 > 0:23:27Well, that's a very valid point.
0:23:27 > 0:23:29The next step up is a marathon.
0:23:29 > 0:23:32- Yep. I would say so.- I say go juggling, I recommended it.
0:23:32 > 0:23:33- No...- He's not on your team.
0:23:33 > 0:23:37No, I think knitting a scarf only because he said that.
0:23:39 > 0:23:42OK, I'm going to go with juggling.
0:23:42 > 0:23:44What?!
0:23:46 > 0:23:49I trust my friend, Iain.
0:23:49 > 0:23:51The answer is...
0:23:51 > 0:23:52..knitted a scarf.
0:23:56 > 0:23:57You're an idiot.
0:23:57 > 0:23:59- Yeah.- You deserve it.
0:23:59 > 0:24:02Luke, button out.
0:24:02 > 0:24:04Next person to get one wrong is dropped,
0:24:04 > 0:24:07and the other team gets themselves a gold star.
0:24:07 > 0:24:09- AUDIENCE:- Ooooh!
0:24:09 > 0:24:10Vic.
0:24:19 > 0:24:23Or if a coffee pot was full or empty?
0:24:23 > 0:24:26I know those fish - they can be canny cheeky.
0:24:26 > 0:24:28They can be very naughty.
0:24:31 > 0:24:33- Guys.- What do you have, JB?
0:24:33 > 0:24:37- What do you think?- How much damage can fish do in a tank?
0:24:37 > 0:24:39It depends what kind of tank, like,
0:24:39 > 0:24:43if it's one of them tanks, that's quite a lot of damage.
0:24:43 > 0:24:45Exactly, they can do a lot of damage.
0:24:45 > 0:24:47This was in Cambridge, wasn't it?
0:24:47 > 0:24:50Well done, you've managed to remember the question.
0:24:51 > 0:24:54Aye, Iain, based on the fact it's Cambridgeshire
0:24:54 > 0:24:57and people in Cambridgeshire are clever.
0:24:57 > 0:25:00Ah, clever people, you know what they're always doing,
0:25:00 > 0:25:01watching fish.
0:25:03 > 0:25:06I am going to go with coffee pot.
0:25:06 > 0:25:08You are one question away from the drop.
0:25:10 > 0:25:12The answer is...
0:25:12 > 0:25:14..the coffee pot!
0:25:14 > 0:25:16CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:25:17 > 0:25:21OK, Luke Kempner,
0:25:21 > 0:25:24this is to avoid the drop.
0:25:33 > 0:25:35Polly, what would you, what's your favourite country?
0:25:35 > 0:25:36Bolivia or Columbia?
0:25:36 > 0:25:38Columbia's a nicer word to say.
0:25:40 > 0:25:41- The girl's got a point. - That is all I need.
0:25:41 > 0:25:42Columbia!
0:25:44 > 0:25:47- It is nice to say.- Don't mess it up.
0:25:47 > 0:25:49- Don't mess it up! - I won't mess it up.
0:25:51 > 0:25:54The country with the more airports is...
0:25:56 > 0:25:57..written down...
0:25:57 > 0:25:59Oh!
0:25:59 > 0:26:00..on my card...
0:26:01 > 0:26:03..Bolivia!
0:26:03 > 0:26:05CHEERING
0:26:13 > 0:26:15Which means, at the end of that round,
0:26:15 > 0:26:17the gold star goes to Avril's team!
0:26:17 > 0:26:20CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:26:21 > 0:26:24- AUDIENCE:- Drop, drop, drop, drop!
0:26:32 > 0:26:34And that's just about it,
0:26:34 > 0:26:37all I need to do now is add up the stars.
0:26:37 > 0:26:39- AUDIENCE:- Ohhhhhhhh!
0:26:46 > 0:26:48And the winners are...
0:26:49 > 0:26:51..Polly's team!
0:26:51 > 0:26:54CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:26:54 > 0:26:56Congratulations, you lot,
0:26:56 > 0:26:58you get all the flowers we could afford
0:26:58 > 0:26:59out of Mr Smash's pocket money,
0:26:59 > 0:27:02I just hope no-one's going to get hay fever.
0:27:02 > 0:27:06As for Avril's team, not only does the dog get your homework,
0:27:06 > 0:27:07but you have detention with Mr Smash.
0:27:07 > 0:27:11It's time to take the walk of shame.
0:27:11 > 0:27:12- # La, la, la, la-la, la... # - AUDIENCE:- Losers!
0:27:12 > 0:27:14- # La, la, la, la-la, la... # - Losers!
0:27:14 > 0:27:16- # La, la, la, la-la, la... # - Losers!
0:27:16 > 0:27:18- # La, la, la, la-la, la... # - Losers!
0:27:18 > 0:27:21- # La, la, la, la-la, la... # - Losers!
0:27:21 > 0:27:23- AUDIENCE:- Losers!
0:27:23 > 0:27:25So, guys, that's your lot.
0:27:25 > 0:27:28As ever, we probably didn't learn much, but do you know what?
0:27:28 > 0:27:30It was fun trying.
0:27:30 > 0:27:32See you next time on...
0:27:32 > 0:27:35- AUDIENCE:- The Dog Ate My Homework!
0:27:35 > 0:27:38Sees ya!
0:27:40 > 0:27:44CHEERING AND APPLAUSE