0:00:01 > 0:00:03# My alarm wakes me up I'm ready to rise
0:00:03 > 0:00:06# I splash some water on my face to get the sleep out my eyes
0:00:06 > 0:00:08# The sun's out shining I better stop rhyming
0:00:08 > 0:00:10# As Mum's always telling me "Fix up your timing!"
0:00:10 > 0:00:12# Now we've got a show on CBBC
0:00:12 > 0:00:14# So all of my fans will be out to see me
0:00:14 > 0:00:16# It's sick cos the time is here
0:00:16 > 0:00:19# Now, sit back, relax and get ready to cheer
0:00:19 > 0:00:21# We're doing well, as you can tell
0:00:21 > 0:00:23# So here comes the show with Johnny...
0:00:23 > 0:00:24# And Inel. #
0:00:27 > 0:00:30HE ROARS
0:00:32 > 0:00:34You're on the team.
0:00:35 > 0:00:39# Good luck with your part-time lover
0:00:39 > 0:00:42# I know I'm gonna find me another... #
0:00:44 > 0:00:47I'm suffering from a serious lack of bants, bants!
0:00:47 > 0:00:48Uh-huh.
0:00:52 > 0:00:55CHEERING
0:00:56 > 0:00:57Yeah.
0:00:59 > 0:01:01Hello and welcome to The Johnny And Inel Show,
0:01:01 > 0:01:05packed to the rafters with comedy, so there is room for no more.
0:01:05 > 0:01:07Oh, yeah. I mean, we'll have to shave off Johnny's hair
0:01:07 > 0:01:09to make room for more gags.
0:01:09 > 0:01:12Do not even joke about that, Inel.
0:01:12 > 0:01:15This haircut is worth more than your whole outfit put together.
0:01:15 > 0:01:18In fact, it's more than a haircut. It's more like family.
0:01:18 > 0:01:21I just want to give it a big hug.
0:01:21 > 0:01:23LAUGHTER
0:01:23 > 0:01:25OK. That's a bit weird.
0:01:25 > 0:01:28I'm on a show with a guy that cuddles his own hair.
0:01:29 > 0:01:33You're just jealous, Inel. Cos you haven't got any hair.
0:01:33 > 0:01:35I bet you feel lonely over there, don't you?
0:01:35 > 0:01:37Ha! I'm fine with having no hair.
0:01:37 > 0:01:40Shows off my perfectly shaped head.
0:01:41 > 0:01:43Perfectly shaped like a bean!
0:01:43 > 0:01:45LAUGHTER
0:01:45 > 0:01:48Why don't you just say hello to him, please?
0:01:48 > 0:01:50I'm not saying hello to your hair! That's ridiculous!
0:01:50 > 0:01:53Besides, we've got Greet Of The Week to do.
0:01:53 > 0:01:54The only thing is, Inel,
0:01:54 > 0:01:56you haven't got anyone to do Greet Of The Week with.
0:01:56 > 0:01:59What you talking about? I'm doing it with you!
0:01:59 > 0:02:01That's not the message I'm getting from Fro-Fro.
0:02:01 > 0:02:04He's saying, "Don't do Greet Of The Week with Inel.
0:02:04 > 0:02:06"Not until he says hello to me first."
0:02:06 > 0:02:08You've got to be joking!
0:02:08 > 0:02:12He just wants us to be one big, happy family, Inel.
0:02:12 > 0:02:15Me, you and Fro-Fro.
0:02:15 > 0:02:17LAUGHTER
0:02:17 > 0:02:19Fine.
0:02:19 > 0:02:22Hello, Fro-Fro.
0:02:22 > 0:02:23How you doing?
0:02:23 > 0:02:27- He doesn't talk much.- Oh!
0:02:27 > 0:02:29Anyway, let's get cracking on with Greet Of The Week, shall we?
0:02:29 > 0:02:31Exactly.
0:02:31 > 0:02:34- This one's going to be wicked, this week.- Oh, the greet this week!
0:02:34 > 0:02:38Clap, slap, together, spin, point!
0:02:38 > 0:02:41- Got that, got that.- Did you guys see that?- CHILDREN:- Yeah!
0:02:41 > 0:02:43- Let's give it a go.- Stand up, then! Let's get going.
0:02:43 > 0:02:45The first thing we do is a clap.
0:02:45 > 0:02:46Three, two, one...
0:02:46 > 0:02:50Clap, slap, together, spin and point!
0:02:50 > 0:02:52They've got it.
0:02:52 > 0:02:54I am so happy we've done a good Greet Of The Week.
0:02:54 > 0:02:56And I'm pleased you've made up
0:02:56 > 0:02:59with Fro-Fro, as well. Yeah.
0:02:59 > 0:03:02The thing is, Inel, now we've got our own show,
0:03:02 > 0:03:04kids want to be like us.
0:03:04 > 0:03:07In fact, since the first show went out, sales of green hoodies
0:03:07 > 0:03:09and afro wigs have gone through the roof.
0:03:09 > 0:03:11LAUGHTER
0:03:11 > 0:03:12That's a laugh.
0:03:12 > 0:03:14I mean, who's going to want to buy afro wigs
0:03:14 > 0:03:17and green hoodies to look like you?
0:03:17 > 0:03:21Hater alert! Hater alert!
0:03:21 > 0:03:24Actually, Inel, if you'll look over here...
0:03:27 > 0:03:28Right.
0:03:28 > 0:03:31As you can see, although demand's gone up,
0:03:31 > 0:03:34the quality of what's being sold is just not good enough.
0:03:34 > 0:03:37Look at these poor little guys.
0:03:37 > 0:03:40You're right. They look terrible! Shocking!
0:03:40 > 0:03:42I just can't see them suffer any more.
0:03:42 > 0:03:43So what you going to do, then?
0:03:43 > 0:03:46I've decided I'm going to set up a stall selling afro wigs
0:03:46 > 0:03:49and green hoodies, so the kids can buy them
0:03:49 > 0:03:52knowing that they're the highest of quality.
0:03:52 > 0:03:56- Oh, you're just all heart, you are!- Born to help.
0:04:09 > 0:04:12Kids, does detention stop you from
0:04:12 > 0:04:15getting the best food in the canteen?
0:04:16 > 0:04:20Are you always left with the rubbish sweets in the tuck shop?
0:04:21 > 0:04:24Do you never get to sit next to your best friends in assembly?
0:04:25 > 0:04:27Well, then, you need...
0:04:29 > 0:04:32..Place-Savers - we help you keep the best place in the queue,
0:04:32 > 0:04:34so you don't miss out on any of the action again.
0:04:34 > 0:04:35- Whatcha.- Hiya.
0:04:35 > 0:04:38See what Place-Savers can do for you.
0:04:38 > 0:04:40Call now.
0:04:43 > 0:04:45Once upon a time a kid
0:04:45 > 0:04:48got dumped in the trash.
0:04:48 > 0:04:51That kid discovered he had powers,
0:04:51 > 0:04:53powers of the waste.
0:04:55 > 0:04:57The thrilling adventures of...
0:04:57 > 0:05:00Wasteman!
0:05:04 > 0:05:07So, Bearman, welcome to the waste lair.
0:05:07 > 0:05:09So, you want to join forces with me?
0:05:09 > 0:05:13Not a surprise, me being a world-famous superhero and all that.
0:05:13 > 0:05:16But why should I let you on the team?
0:05:16 > 0:05:19Well, you can do things that I can't do
0:05:19 > 0:05:21and I can do things that you can't do.
0:05:21 > 0:05:24- Why don't you show me some of your powers?- OK.
0:05:24 > 0:05:26I've got bear strength.
0:05:26 > 0:05:29Bear strength, sounds good. Let's see it.
0:05:33 > 0:05:37HE ROARS
0:05:39 > 0:05:41Right.
0:05:41 > 0:05:43That wasn't really bear strength, was it?
0:05:43 > 0:05:46- Oh, it was.- Hmmm. OK.
0:05:47 > 0:05:50- So, is there anything else you can do?- Oh, yeah, yeah.
0:05:50 > 0:05:52I've got the bear roar,
0:05:52 > 0:05:54where you scare people and that.
0:05:54 > 0:05:57Awesome. Let's go. Let's see it.
0:05:59 > 0:06:03HE ROARS
0:06:06 > 0:06:08Right.
0:06:08 > 0:06:12It looks quite a lot like when you got your bear strength.
0:06:12 > 0:06:13No, they're different.
0:06:13 > 0:06:15Yeah, sure.
0:06:15 > 0:06:18Look, is there anything else you can do?
0:06:18 > 0:06:20I can summon bears for when I'm in trouble,
0:06:20 > 0:06:22so they can come and help me.
0:06:22 > 0:06:24No way! You should have said that at the start!
0:06:24 > 0:06:26I mean, if you can just get a big bear down here,
0:06:26 > 0:06:27that'd be awesome!
0:06:27 > 0:06:29When we're fighting a villain,
0:06:29 > 0:06:32they'll run off scared if there's a big bear there.
0:06:32 > 0:06:35- Go on, let's see it!- All right.
0:06:36 > 0:06:40HE ROARS
0:06:43 > 0:06:45Right. I'm going to be honest here.
0:06:45 > 0:06:48You don't really seem to be doing anything, mate.
0:06:48 > 0:06:51You're just roaring and growling in midair, you know?
0:06:51 > 0:06:54You said there was a bear coming down here.
0:06:54 > 0:06:55There's not a bear anywhere around.
0:06:55 > 0:06:59Whoa. That's where you're wrong. Hold up.
0:07:01 > 0:07:02BEAR POPS
0:07:04 > 0:07:07BEARMAN LAUGHS
0:07:07 > 0:07:10Oh, you've got to be kidding me.
0:07:10 > 0:07:12That's not going to scare anyone!
0:07:13 > 0:07:15BEARMAN LAUGHS
0:07:15 > 0:07:17Calm down, Barry. Calm down.
0:07:17 > 0:07:19Barry said he's going to beat you up.
0:07:19 > 0:07:23Come off it. It's a teddy, for Pete's sake!
0:07:24 > 0:07:26Come on, Barry. Come on, yeah?
0:07:26 > 0:07:29Calm down, yeah? Calm down.
0:07:29 > 0:07:32Barry said he's going to sort you out.
0:07:32 > 0:07:33Oh, come off it.
0:07:33 > 0:07:35That little thing?
0:07:37 > 0:07:40Whoa. Whoa. Whoa!
0:07:40 > 0:07:42Come off it, Barry! Come off it, Barry!
0:07:42 > 0:07:45Leave it! Leave it, yeah?
0:07:45 > 0:07:46What's he saying?
0:07:46 > 0:07:48Barry said that
0:07:48 > 0:07:51once he's done with you,
0:07:51 > 0:07:53there's going to be nothing left but your cape
0:07:53 > 0:07:57and he's going to use your hair to brush his teeth!
0:07:57 > 0:07:59His words, not mine.
0:07:59 > 0:08:01All right, calm him down, will you?
0:08:01 > 0:08:02You're on the team.
0:08:15 > 0:08:18Welcome back to The Johnny And Inel Show!
0:08:18 > 0:08:20Well, it's just me at the minute,
0:08:20 > 0:08:23as Johnny is a bit preoccupied with his stall.
0:08:23 > 0:08:25Let's go take a look.
0:08:25 > 0:08:26All right there, Inel?
0:08:26 > 0:08:29Can I interest you in an afro wig?
0:08:29 > 0:08:31INEL LAUGHS
0:08:31 > 0:08:33No thanks, mate. If I wanted to look like a clown,
0:08:33 > 0:08:35I'd put a red nose on.
0:08:35 > 0:08:36LAUGHTER
0:08:36 > 0:08:39What about a green hoodie? Really bring out the colour in your eyes.
0:08:39 > 0:08:42Flattery will get you nowhere, mate.
0:08:43 > 0:08:44Are you sure, Inel?
0:08:44 > 0:08:47Cos they're really selling quite fast. Take a look around.
0:08:47 > 0:08:51Whoa! How did you get all these guys to get all your stuff?
0:08:51 > 0:08:52I told you, Inel.
0:08:52 > 0:08:56Kids want to be like us now. They really do, yeah.
0:08:56 > 0:08:58A little while back, a kid came up to me and went,
0:08:58 > 0:09:02"Mate, do you know where I can get an Inel beanie hat?"
0:09:02 > 0:09:04I told him, "I only stock high-quality gear."
0:09:04 > 0:09:06I had to send him on his way.
0:09:06 > 0:09:09But yeah, I'm pretty sure there are some strange little kids out there
0:09:09 > 0:09:13that might actually be interested in what you have to offer.
0:09:13 > 0:09:14Hmmm. I'm not too sure.
0:09:14 > 0:09:17Look, there's only one way to find out, mate.
0:09:17 > 0:09:20There's plenty of room for a stall next to me.
0:09:20 > 0:09:21Yeah.
0:09:36 > 0:09:38Welcome back, guys.
0:09:38 > 0:09:41I'm Shotcaller007,
0:09:41 > 0:09:44record points score holder on Splatface 2,
0:09:44 > 0:09:46at Mr Tom's Arcade.
0:09:46 > 0:09:48I'm MadJimbo28
0:09:48 > 0:09:54and I've just completed Munchman 4 in 52 minutes,
0:09:54 > 0:09:57and I've checked on the internet, that's a record.
0:09:57 > 0:10:01And welcome to another episode of Super Game Reviewers!
0:10:01 > 0:10:03Yes, that's right.
0:10:03 > 0:10:06Now, last time we showed you the last level
0:10:06 > 0:10:09of Productive Teenager 2, Helping Mum Carry The Shopping.
0:10:09 > 0:10:12This time, we'll be looking at level two,
0:10:12 > 0:10:16which is Doing Your Homework Before Mum Gets Home.
0:10:16 > 0:10:19- Right, game on.- Game on.
0:10:19 > 0:10:23Now, it's important to pick your homework in the right order.
0:10:23 > 0:10:25I like to start off with English,
0:10:25 > 0:10:29as my boredom power bar is relatively high early on.
0:10:34 > 0:10:35AB.
0:10:37 > 0:10:39You've got to press A and B.
0:10:39 > 0:10:41XY works, as well.
0:10:41 > 0:10:42AB, please.
0:10:42 > 0:10:43I've done this level before.
0:10:43 > 0:10:45Can you please press A and B.
0:10:45 > 0:10:47- Fine!- Please press AB.
0:10:48 > 0:10:53You'll notice that MadJimbo is using the AB technique.
0:10:53 > 0:10:56This increases his writing rate.
0:10:56 > 0:10:58Uh-oh! We've got a bit of trouble!
0:10:58 > 0:11:00PHONE RINGS
0:11:00 > 0:11:04Right. Now MadJimbo really has to concentrate,
0:11:04 > 0:11:06because his phone's ringing.
0:11:06 > 0:11:08It will only be your friend
0:11:08 > 0:11:12and this will lead to a negative 200 distraction damage.
0:11:12 > 0:11:14PHONE RINGS
0:11:14 > 0:11:16- And it's very hard to salvage after that!- It is.
0:11:18 > 0:11:20- Oh!- That was close.
0:11:20 > 0:11:22Now that we have English completed,
0:11:22 > 0:11:24I'm going to use an orange squash
0:11:24 > 0:11:27power-up before I start to tackle maths.
0:11:27 > 0:11:30GAME BUZZES
0:11:30 > 0:11:33Now, the time in which Mum returns home varies.
0:11:33 > 0:11:37We've had anything between two minutes and five minutes.
0:11:37 > 0:11:41Do you remember that one time when the mum took six minutes?
0:11:41 > 0:11:43That was a crazy major glitch!
0:11:43 > 0:11:45- Major glitch!- Major glitch!
0:11:45 > 0:11:48- Crazy glitch!- Major glitch!
0:11:48 > 0:11:50Glitchy, glitchy!
0:11:51 > 0:11:52Glitchy.
0:11:52 > 0:11:55Glitch.
0:11:55 > 0:11:57Glitchy.
0:11:57 > 0:12:00MADJIMBO LAUGHS
0:12:03 > 0:12:04Glitch.
0:12:05 > 0:12:08- Right. So, you'll notice that... - Nigel, you up there?
0:12:08 > 0:12:11..MadJimbo is just...
0:12:11 > 0:12:13Nigel, can you hear me? Otherwise I'm coming up!
0:12:13 > 0:12:15No! Don't you dare come up here!
0:12:15 > 0:12:19Look at the pressure that I'm under!
0:12:19 > 0:12:21It's amazing I've got to this level of gaming
0:12:21 > 0:12:24with this kind of pressure at home!
0:12:24 > 0:12:27She just doesn't get it!
0:12:37 > 0:12:39CHEERING
0:12:39 > 0:12:41Welcome back to The Johnny And Inel Show!
0:12:41 > 0:12:46First off, may I say thank you to Johnny who advised me
0:12:46 > 0:12:48about setting up my new stall.
0:12:48 > 0:12:51So now all the kids can get their beanies and cardies
0:12:51 > 0:12:55fresh from the Inel's Beanie And Cardie Emporium.
0:12:55 > 0:12:56Don't worry about it, Inel.
0:12:56 > 0:12:58I mean, I'm pleased for you.
0:12:58 > 0:13:00And I'm happy for these guys, as well.
0:13:00 > 0:13:02They all look so great, don't they?
0:13:02 > 0:13:05Even if one half do look slightly better than the other.
0:13:05 > 0:13:07Oh, please. I'm not even just selling clothes.
0:13:07 > 0:13:11I've also started selling the exclusive new Inel phone app.
0:13:11 > 0:13:14- The Inel phone app?- Oh, yeah.
0:13:14 > 0:13:17What in the world is the Inel phone app?
0:13:17 > 0:13:18Take a listen.
0:13:18 > 0:13:20'A-ha!'
0:13:20 > 0:13:22'A-ha!'
0:13:22 > 0:13:25Number one app in the app store.
0:13:25 > 0:13:27Technology, eh? It's great.
0:13:27 > 0:13:29I'm more used to my old school products,
0:13:29 > 0:13:31as you can see.
0:13:33 > 0:13:35Hi, I'm TV's Johnny Cochrane,
0:13:35 > 0:13:37from The Johnny And Inel Show.
0:13:37 > 0:13:40Now, I can't tell you how many times someone's come up to me on
0:13:40 > 0:13:44the street and said, "Whoa, what's it like being a superstar like you?
0:13:44 > 0:13:46"How do you deal with the day-to-day pressures
0:13:46 > 0:13:48"whilst still look good doing it?"
0:13:48 > 0:13:50Why don't you find out the answers
0:13:50 > 0:13:54to all those questions and more by reading my book...
0:13:57 > 0:13:59..Johnny - Behind The Hair.
0:14:02 > 0:14:05Now, if you'll excuse me, I've got to sign a couple of these.
0:14:05 > 0:14:08Hi, there. Who shall I make this out to?
0:14:08 > 0:14:10My nan, please.
0:14:10 > 0:14:12Your nan? Sure you don't want one?
0:14:12 > 0:14:14Yeah.
0:14:14 > 0:14:16INEL LAUGHS
0:14:16 > 0:14:19See that? That's what happens when you sell old-school products,
0:14:19 > 0:14:22you get old-school customers, as well!
0:14:22 > 0:14:24INEL LAUGHS
0:14:24 > 0:14:27Not my side. It's a bit more tech-savvy, a bit more fresh.
0:14:27 > 0:14:29That right, guys? I mean, a book!
0:14:29 > 0:14:31Why have you written a book?
0:14:31 > 0:14:33You haven't done anything in your life!
0:14:33 > 0:14:37Actually, Inel, people want to know about when I won an Olympic gold.
0:14:37 > 0:14:39On your video game, yeah.
0:14:39 > 0:14:40When I became president.
0:14:40 > 0:14:42Yeah, of the book club.
0:14:42 > 0:14:45When I had a number one single.
0:14:45 > 0:14:48That you downloaded yourself 100,000 times, yeah!
0:14:48 > 0:14:50It doesn't matter, Inel.
0:14:50 > 0:14:52People want to know anyway.
0:14:52 > 0:14:55That's what makes me a fans' favourite.
0:14:55 > 0:14:58More like a nans' favourite.
0:14:58 > 0:14:59LAUGHTER
0:14:59 > 0:15:00What was that, Inel?
0:15:00 > 0:15:02Oh, nothing, mate.
0:15:02 > 0:15:05- It's just I thought my hater alert was going to go off again.- No, no.
0:15:05 > 0:15:09- Must have been a false alarm. - Yeah, it's broken.
0:15:09 > 0:15:12Anyway, excuse me. One of these?
0:15:25 > 0:15:29Hi, welcome to the J&I News Network.
0:15:29 > 0:15:30Our top story today...
0:15:30 > 0:15:34Host, Johnny Cochrane and CEO of company
0:15:34 > 0:15:37Here Today, Not Gone Tomorrow,
0:15:37 > 0:15:40speaks about his booming business.
0:15:40 > 0:15:43Liam Piam interviewed him earlier today. Boom.
0:15:43 > 0:15:49Yeah, it's great. I came from nothing and look at me now.
0:15:49 > 0:15:52Inel Tomlinson, CEO of
0:15:52 > 0:15:54Me, Myself And Inel, talks about
0:15:54 > 0:15:58the recent uprise of his company.
0:15:58 > 0:16:00No, I'm really pleased about how it's all going.
0:16:00 > 0:16:02Never in a million years did I think gamers would want to
0:16:02 > 0:16:06play a game about drinking ginger beer. It's bonkers!
0:16:06 > 0:16:09Couldn't have happened to two nicer gentleman, Boris.
0:16:09 > 0:16:11BORIS LAUGHS
0:16:11 > 0:16:13I agree, Norris.
0:16:13 > 0:16:15THEY LAUGH
0:16:15 > 0:16:17Well, that's it for today's news.
0:16:17 > 0:16:19Tune in next time, with me,
0:16:19 > 0:16:20Boris Horace.
0:16:20 > 0:16:23And me, Norris Gloris.
0:16:23 > 0:16:25- Ta-ta.- Bye-bye.
0:16:38 > 0:16:40Nice. Nice.
0:16:40 > 0:16:43- Need a water.- H2O.
0:16:48 > 0:16:51MAN SNEEZES
0:16:57 > 0:17:00Oh, hello and greetings.
0:17:00 > 0:17:03Ever been out and about,
0:17:03 > 0:17:05enjoying the pleasures of the day,
0:17:05 > 0:17:09when the language used by some youngsters in the vicinity
0:17:09 > 0:17:11completely puzzles you?
0:17:11 > 0:17:16Well, welcome to The Dictionary Of What Kids Say.
0:17:16 > 0:17:20Here, we'll be unveiling the hidden meanings
0:17:20 > 0:17:22behind what your friends are saying.
0:17:23 > 0:17:26This week's word is "bants".
0:17:26 > 0:17:29Bants is short for banter,
0:17:29 > 0:17:34meaning a period of recognised fun or good times.
0:17:34 > 0:17:41Bants was first used in 1916 in south London by a man called
0:17:41 > 0:17:45Charles Pinklesworth, who was out enjoying the day's folly
0:17:45 > 0:17:46with a dear acquaintance of his.
0:17:46 > 0:17:51Upon hearing a sharp quip from the acquaintance, Charles replied,
0:17:51 > 0:17:54"Top bants, Giles."
0:17:54 > 0:17:58Let's hear it in a modern setting, shall we?
0:17:58 > 0:17:59BLONDIE SIGHS
0:17:59 > 0:18:03Oh, my gosh, Robbie, I'm so bored, yeah? Yeah.
0:18:03 > 0:18:05Jade and Rachelle are proper boring.
0:18:05 > 0:18:08I'm suffering from a serious lack of bants, bants!
0:18:08 > 0:18:11Uh-huh. Too much homework, not enough bants, bants!
0:18:11 > 0:18:12I need some party bants, bants!
0:18:12 > 0:18:14Bants.
0:18:14 > 0:18:16HE LAUGHS
0:18:16 > 0:18:20I think that was top bants.
0:18:21 > 0:18:27Join me next time, won't you, on The Dictionary Of What Kids Say.
0:18:29 > 0:18:31MAN SNEEZES
0:18:42 > 0:18:43I can't wait for this, Inel!
0:18:43 > 0:18:45- I'm expecting a mad rush.- Oh, yeah.
0:18:45 > 0:18:47INEL LAUGHS
0:18:47 > 0:18:48Me too.
0:18:50 > 0:18:55Hello! Testing, testing, one, two, one, two, three.
0:18:55 > 0:18:58Will customers please form an orderly queue on the left-hand side
0:18:58 > 0:18:59for Johnny wigs and hoodies
0:18:59 > 0:19:04and on the right-hand side for the Inel Beanie Cardie Emporium.
0:19:04 > 0:19:06Thank you. Thank you very much. Cheers.
0:19:06 > 0:19:08- Is this yours, Johnny?- Yeah.
0:19:08 > 0:19:10We've been using it to keep the canteen door open,
0:19:10 > 0:19:12but we're finished with it now.
0:19:12 > 0:19:13INEL LAUGHS
0:19:13 > 0:19:14Thanks.
0:19:14 > 0:19:16I'd offer to put it in a skip for you,
0:19:16 > 0:19:19but it's overflowing with this rubbish.
0:19:19 > 0:19:21Oh, what?!
0:19:21 > 0:19:24JOHNNY LAUGHS
0:19:25 > 0:19:26Wait, wait, wait!
0:19:26 > 0:19:28Look, there's some customers! Hiya, hiya!
0:19:28 > 0:19:30Do you want to buy my book?
0:19:30 > 0:19:33Look, girls, get my brand-new game, Inel Robot!
0:19:33 > 0:19:37No, thanks. That's like 30 sketches ago.
0:19:37 > 0:19:39It's all about Blondie now.
0:19:40 > 0:19:42Oh, no.
0:19:42 > 0:19:45We're yesterday's news! How did we become out of fashion?
0:19:45 > 0:19:48I know! I mean, look at them!
0:19:50 > 0:19:52- That's it, then!- No, no, no, Johnny.
0:19:52 > 0:19:54We're not giving up just yet.
0:19:54 > 0:19:56I mean, we've got to find another way of trying to be cool again.
0:19:56 > 0:19:58Yeah, you're right, Inel.
0:19:58 > 0:20:01Maybe we could ask our guest of the week, Joe McElderry,
0:20:01 > 0:20:03and see how he manages to remain cool.
0:20:03 > 0:20:04He'll know.
0:20:16 > 0:20:18BOTH: # Bow bow bow, bow bow
0:20:18 > 0:20:21# Bow bow, bow bow, bow bow
0:20:21 > 0:20:22# Bow, bow, bow... #
0:20:22 > 0:20:25This just in.
0:20:25 > 0:20:27TV host Johnny Cochrane's company,
0:20:27 > 0:20:30Hair Today, Not Gone Tomorrow,
0:20:30 > 0:20:31is now bankrupt.
0:20:31 > 0:20:35In similar fashion, TV host Inel Tomlinson's company,
0:20:35 > 0:20:38Me, Myself And Inel, is also no more.
0:20:38 > 0:20:41The two have said to return to their roles on
0:20:41 > 0:20:45The Johnny And Inel Show on CBBC and iPlayer.
0:20:45 > 0:20:49The pair have asked that everyone respect their privacy
0:20:49 > 0:20:51during these traumatic times.
0:20:51 > 0:20:53In unrelated news,
0:20:53 > 0:20:56sales of blonde wigs have skyrocketed recently,
0:20:56 > 0:20:59with the new popularity surge of Blondie,
0:20:59 > 0:21:02a character on The Johnny And Inel Show.
0:21:02 > 0:21:05Entertainment sites have reported that she's currently in talks
0:21:05 > 0:21:10with UK film director Danny Boyle in relation to a new film,
0:21:10 > 0:21:11Slumdog Blondie.
0:21:11 > 0:21:15She has also released a new line of ringtones,
0:21:15 > 0:21:17which I happen to have right here.
0:21:17 > 0:21:21# Liberties... #
0:21:21 > 0:21:23Liberties!
0:21:23 > 0:21:26- Priceless.- My daughter would love that.
0:21:26 > 0:21:29So would my wife.
0:21:29 > 0:21:32That's it for today's news. Tune in next time
0:21:32 > 0:21:35with me, Boris Horace.
0:21:35 > 0:21:37And me, Norris Glo...
0:21:39 > 0:21:41Norris Gloris.
0:21:41 > 0:21:43Ta-ta.
0:21:43 > 0:21:44Bye-bye.
0:21:53 > 0:21:56Guys, please welcome to the show, Joe McElderry!
0:21:56 > 0:21:58CHEERING
0:21:58 > 0:22:01- Hello, how you doing? - Good to see you, Joe.- Grab a seat.
0:22:02 > 0:22:05I think we're going to start by taking a look at your video.
0:22:05 > 0:22:07So, if I may...
0:22:07 > 0:22:10# Here's what I believe
0:22:10 > 0:22:13# Good luck with your part-time lover
0:22:13 > 0:22:16# I know I'm gonna find me another
0:22:18 > 0:22:21# Cos now I see
0:22:21 > 0:22:24# Now I know enough for me
0:22:24 > 0:22:28# And you and I will never be
0:22:28 > 0:22:29# You had your chance
0:22:29 > 0:22:34# It's time to set you free
0:22:34 > 0:22:36# Here's what I believe
0:22:36 > 0:22:39# You've gotta be on one side or another
0:22:39 > 0:22:43# It's got to be me or the other
0:22:43 > 0:22:47# That's how it's got to be
0:22:47 > 0:22:50# Here's what I believe
0:22:50 > 0:22:52# You've gotta be on one side or the other... #
0:22:52 > 0:22:55CHEERING
0:22:55 > 0:22:58Amazing video, Joe. Where was that filmed? LA?
0:22:58 > 0:23:00No, it was actually filmed in South Shields. Very glamorous.
0:23:00 > 0:23:02- Same thing.- Nice, nice.
0:23:02 > 0:23:05So, Joe, we've got a couple of questions for you.
0:23:05 > 0:23:08First off, you won X Factor and you got, overnight,
0:23:08 > 0:23:09legions and legions of fans.
0:23:09 > 0:23:10Can you give us some tips,
0:23:10 > 0:23:12cos we're expecting the same thing.
0:23:12 > 0:23:14JOE LAUGHS
0:23:14 > 0:23:17It takes a bit of getting used to, everybody recognising you
0:23:17 > 0:23:19when you walk down the street.
0:23:19 > 0:23:22It's quite surreal. But it's part of the job.
0:23:22 > 0:23:25You've done duets with many people in your time.
0:23:25 > 0:23:27Have you ever done a duet with someone who's
0:23:27 > 0:23:29maybe not up to scratch?
0:23:30 > 0:23:32JOE LAUGHS
0:23:32 > 0:23:35- You've got to work with what you've got.- Tell me about it.
0:23:35 > 0:23:37And you've just got to enjoy it.
0:23:38 > 0:23:41All right, Joe. Everybody knows that Johnny loves his green hoodies
0:23:41 > 0:23:44and everybody knows that I love my yellow beanies.
0:23:44 > 0:23:47What's something you've been given that you love the most?
0:23:47 > 0:23:49I once got a first class flight
0:23:49 > 0:23:52given to us on the way back from...
0:23:52 > 0:23:56I was in America and the air hostess was a fan and she gave us
0:23:56 > 0:23:59one of the huge seats with the beds and everything
0:23:59 > 0:24:02and the free food and all that, and that was pretty cool.
0:24:02 > 0:24:05You know what, I've got to say from the bottom of my heart,
0:24:05 > 0:24:07- thank you for coming on the show. - My pleasure.
0:24:07 > 0:24:08It's been an absolute privilege.
0:24:08 > 0:24:11And, to show our appreciation,
0:24:11 > 0:24:15I just wanted to give you
0:24:15 > 0:24:17a free copy of this book. My book.
0:24:17 > 0:24:20All you have to do is just hold that up to the camera there
0:24:20 > 0:24:22and say you love this book.
0:24:22 > 0:24:23But I haven't read it.
0:24:23 > 0:24:27Not necessary. Just hold it up and smile. Look at the camera.
0:24:27 > 0:24:29Joe, Joe. It's not necessary at all.
0:24:30 > 0:24:34On the other hand, I hear you like your video games.
0:24:34 > 0:24:35Not really.
0:24:35 > 0:24:39All you have to do is hold this up and say, "This is I-mazing."
0:24:39 > 0:24:40To that camera.
0:24:40 > 0:24:42Don't worry about that. Just have the copy of my book there
0:24:42 > 0:24:45and say you think it's going to be a bestseller.
0:24:45 > 0:24:47Look, guys, this is a bit embarrassing.
0:24:47 > 0:24:50I don't even know who you guys are.
0:24:50 > 0:24:54I mean, I was asked to do this show and it was fun, but that's it.
0:24:54 > 0:24:57To be honest, I thought you were the cleaners.
0:24:57 > 0:24:58LAUGHTER
0:24:58 > 0:25:03- OK.- Maybe you should watch a bit more CBBC, eh?- Yeah!- Yeah?
0:25:03 > 0:25:06What cave have you been living in?! Don't know who we are.
0:25:06 > 0:25:08Guys, give it up for Joe McElderry!
0:25:09 > 0:25:12CHEERING
0:25:13 > 0:25:16Let's just face it.
0:25:16 > 0:25:18We're just not cool, any more.
0:25:18 > 0:25:20Yeah, it is hard to take, though.
0:25:20 > 0:25:22Yeah, I know. I know.
0:25:22 > 0:25:27Look on the bright side. We've still got each other and the show.
0:25:27 > 0:25:29Yeah, you're right.
0:25:29 > 0:25:31I mean, who needs a Johnny wig or an Inel hat
0:25:31 > 0:25:33when you've got the real Johnny and Inel, hey?
0:25:33 > 0:25:35LAUGHTER
0:25:41 > 0:25:45And that's why Humpty Dumpty had a great fall.
0:25:45 > 0:25:49Back to you guys in the studio.
0:25:49 > 0:25:53And cut. It's a wrap for Liam Piam.
0:25:53 > 0:25:55Thank you, thank you.
0:25:55 > 0:25:57Well done. Good luck with your next project, OK?
0:25:57 > 0:25:59Thanks. Cheers. Woo!
0:25:59 > 0:26:02- So, what are you going to do on your break?- I don't know.
0:26:02 > 0:26:04Probably just have a walk in the park.
0:26:04 > 0:26:07Better head off now, before it gets dark.
0:26:07 > 0:26:09Aaaargh!
0:26:09 > 0:26:13Somebody give me some water to put this guy out!
0:26:13 > 0:26:15Frighteningly good wordplay!
0:26:15 > 0:26:17Waxing lyrical!
0:26:21 > 0:26:23See you later.
0:26:31 > 0:26:34Welcome back to The Johnny And Inel Show.
0:26:34 > 0:26:36CHEERING
0:26:36 > 0:26:38Ha-ha! And you know what?
0:26:38 > 0:26:40You don't need a beanie, a cardie,
0:26:40 > 0:26:43or a hoodie or an app to be part of this show.
0:26:43 > 0:26:45Although afros do help.
0:26:45 > 0:26:48And you know what? From now on, we're not selling nothing.
0:26:48 > 0:26:51And next week's show's going to be even more exciting -
0:26:51 > 0:26:53there's not even going to be a stall in sight.
0:26:53 > 0:26:55Cos you can get all our stuff online.
0:26:55 > 0:26:57We're not selling anything. Nothing.
0:26:57 > 0:26:59Yeah, you're right. Inel is right.
0:26:59 > 0:27:01We're just pleased to have you all tuning in, guys.
0:27:01 > 0:27:05So, what happened to all the Blondie outfits, guys?
0:27:05 > 0:27:07That was in the past.
0:27:07 > 0:27:11I look back at myself now and think, "What was I doing back then?"
0:27:11 > 0:27:12Oh, I can't believe this.
0:27:12 > 0:27:15One minute they're loyal fans, the next minute they don't want to know.
0:27:15 > 0:27:17Speak for yourself, Inel.
0:27:17 > 0:27:19I've managed to hang on to some of my fans.
0:27:21 > 0:27:24Let me see that.
0:27:24 > 0:27:26Look at this, look at this.
0:27:26 > 0:27:31Signed from Beryl, Dorothy, Deirdre and Doris.
0:27:31 > 0:27:33Nans' favourite.
0:27:33 > 0:27:35INEL LAUGHS
0:27:35 > 0:27:36Do you know what, Inel?
0:27:36 > 0:27:39I don't have an age restriction on a jolly fan club.
0:27:39 > 0:27:42- Everybody's welcome. - Yeah, you're right.
0:27:42 > 0:27:44I mean, we do love all our fans.
0:27:44 > 0:27:47Anyway, till next time, we're going to keep making it look good.
0:27:47 > 0:27:49The only way Johnny and Inel could. A-ha!
0:27:49 > 0:27:51Hit the music.
0:27:51 > 0:27:53# My mum wakes me up I'm ready to rise
0:27:53 > 0:27:55# Splash some water on my face To get the sleep out my eyes
0:27:55 > 0:27:58# The sun's out shining I better stop rhyming
0:27:58 > 0:28:00# Cos Mum's always telling me, "Fix up your timing!"
0:28:00 > 0:28:02# Now we've got a show on CBBC
0:28:02 > 0:28:04# So all of my fans will be out to see me
0:28:04 > 0:28:06# It's sick, cos the time is here
0:28:06 > 0:28:08# Now, sit back, relax and get ready to cheer
0:28:08 > 0:28:10# We're doing well as you can tell
0:28:10 > 0:28:12- # So here comes the show with Johnny - # And Inel. #
0:28:12 > 0:28:14Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd