Scabhunters

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0:00:02 > 0:00:05Welcome to the Revolting World of Stanley Brown.

0:00:05 > 0:00:07Go science!

0:00:07 > 0:00:08Atchoo!

0:00:08 > 0:00:11Sick.

0:00:11 > 0:00:14Stanley is going to be the world's greatest scientist.

0:00:14 > 0:00:15Whoa!

0:00:15 > 0:00:17It's just that he doesn't know that yet.

0:00:17 > 0:00:20This is his next door neighbour Jess.

0:00:20 > 0:00:22And his best friend Mike.

0:00:22 > 0:00:25Here's Archie.

0:00:25 > 0:00:28I'm your great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great-grandson,

0:00:28 > 0:00:30from the future. I'm invisible.

0:00:30 > 0:00:32And I'm invisible too.

0:00:32 > 0:00:35I'm Olivia, Archie's incredible robot assistant.

0:00:35 > 0:00:38We've come back in time to make sure that Stanley

0:00:38 > 0:00:40keeps up his revolting experiments

0:00:40 > 0:00:43and becomes the greatest scientist ever known.

0:01:15 > 0:01:16SHE SCREAMS

0:01:16 > 0:01:18What's up, Mum?

0:01:18 > 0:01:20Hey, my scabs!

0:01:20 > 0:01:24Ugh! You have fixed your scabs onto a card?

0:01:24 > 0:01:28Yeah. I tried to get them framed but they threw me out of the shop,

0:01:28 > 0:01:29which gave me that little beauty.

0:01:29 > 0:01:31Why did you put them in my cupboard?

0:01:31 > 0:01:35I didn't think you'd want them in the fridge. I got this one from a dog's back.

0:01:35 > 0:01:37I blame myself.

0:01:37 > 0:01:41Don't. Blame the internet. You're the one who lets me use it.

0:01:41 > 0:01:44Today's the deadline for the gross-out website

0:01:44 > 0:01:45Collection Of The Month.

0:01:45 > 0:01:49My scabs are a sure-fire winner. Even geekboy2000 can't match this!

0:01:49 > 0:01:52Geekboy who? Oh, that sweet kid you chat to online?

0:01:52 > 0:01:55Sweet! He is my ultimate nemesis!

0:01:55 > 0:01:58Last week he fell off his BMX, scabs everywhere!

0:01:58 > 0:02:00Some people have all the luck.

0:02:00 > 0:02:03Yeah, but he doesn't even deserve it.

0:02:03 > 0:02:08My scabs rock, your scabs fail! I will be victorious!

0:02:08 > 0:02:13Look upon my scabs and despair, losers! Arm scabs! Knee scabs!

0:02:13 > 0:02:17Chin scabs! I am the scab master!

0:02:21 > 0:02:24Yes! Another one for the scab daddy!

0:02:24 > 0:02:26Ow.

0:02:26 > 0:02:30He's always rubbing my nose in how great his scabs are.

0:02:30 > 0:02:32But this month, he's going down,

0:02:32 > 0:02:36the gross-out website is going to love my collection.

0:02:36 > 0:02:38Well, all the best with that, I suppose.

0:02:38 > 0:02:40You could've asked where they were.

0:02:40 > 0:02:42Well, I wasn't actually looking for scabs!

0:02:42 > 0:02:45I was trying to find those earrings Auntie Phyllis gave me for Christmas.

0:02:45 > 0:02:48The ones Pat Butcher binned for being too horrible?

0:02:48 > 0:02:52They were a very thoughtful present. But yes, those ones.

0:02:52 > 0:02:54I just, I can't find them and she's coming over later

0:02:54 > 0:02:57and she's going to want to see me in them, I know,

0:02:57 > 0:02:58you know what she's like.

0:02:58 > 0:03:00MONSTROUS ROAR

0:03:00 > 0:03:03Yes. Yes, I do.

0:03:03 > 0:03:05So, you'll have to get your own breakfast this morning.

0:03:05 > 0:03:07When do I not get my own breakfast?

0:03:11 > 0:03:13When you get someone else's by mistake!

0:03:13 > 0:03:16Hi, Archie. Is that my cap?

0:03:16 > 0:03:19And Steph's snood?

0:03:19 > 0:03:21Just trying to live like you historical folks.

0:03:21 > 0:03:24What's for breakfast?

0:03:24 > 0:03:28C-c-corn f-f-flakes?

0:03:28 > 0:03:30You eat flakes of precious corn?

0:03:30 > 0:03:33Don't you know what these things are worth?

0:03:33 > 0:03:36With a box of these I could buy my own starship! Give me them!

0:03:46 > 0:03:51You haven't borrowed one of my crystal earrings, have you, Stanley?

0:03:51 > 0:03:56Mum, what possible use would I have for a crystal?

0:03:58 > 0:04:01Apart from trying to harness its light refracting properties

0:04:01 > 0:04:04in the construction of a giant laser cannon!

0:04:04 > 0:04:08Hmm, tidy this up, I can't look at it.

0:04:18 > 0:04:22I have to say these cornflakes taste saltier than I imagined.

0:04:28 > 0:04:31That wasn't a cornflake! It was the biggest scab in my collection!

0:04:31 > 0:04:33Eh? Sca-what now?

0:04:33 > 0:04:35I'll never beat geekboy2000 now!

0:04:35 > 0:04:38What are these things you call "scabs"?

0:04:38 > 0:04:40You've never heard of scabs?

0:04:40 > 0:04:43- Not until now.- You've never fallen over and cut yourself?

0:04:43 > 0:04:46No, but once I...

0:04:46 > 0:04:48I broke a nail.

0:04:48 > 0:04:51Don't ask me about it. It's too traumatic.

0:04:51 > 0:04:54Wow. Is the future that safe?

0:04:54 > 0:04:58Yeah, it's like well safe. Aiii!

0:04:58 > 0:05:02- Not like that. - Then I've got no idea what you mean.

0:05:02 > 0:05:03Oh, hi, Olivia.

0:05:03 > 0:05:04Archie, have you learnt nothing?

0:05:04 > 0:05:07The scab is nature's favourite wound adornment.

0:05:07 > 0:05:10When you cut yourself, tiny blood cells called platelets

0:05:10 > 0:05:13start sticking to the injured skin, plugging the wound

0:05:13 > 0:05:16and very thoughtfully stopping you bleeding to death.

0:05:16 > 0:05:20They also stop horrible germs and dirt from getting into your body.

0:05:20 > 0:05:24Scabs are your friends! Just a bit weird to collect.

0:05:24 > 0:05:26Scabs are your body's version of a plaster.

0:05:26 > 0:05:28Magnificent on a cut or a graze

0:05:28 > 0:05:31but you really wouldn't want to accidentally swallow one.

0:05:31 > 0:05:33It could make you sick.

0:05:33 > 0:05:37Oh, yuck! I hate platelets! And I'm on a blood-free diet!

0:05:37 > 0:05:41Olivia! Help!

0:05:43 > 0:05:46Steph, are you sure you haven't seen my crystal earrings

0:05:46 > 0:05:48that Auntie Phyllis gave me?

0:05:48 > 0:05:50No, but have you tried Bruce Forsyth?

0:05:50 > 0:05:54I'm sure he was after a couple of new chandeliers for Strictly.

0:05:54 > 0:05:56Oh, ha ha ha, yes, very funny.

0:05:56 > 0:05:59Yes, thank you both for your help and jewellery criticisms.

0:06:06 > 0:06:09Wow! Beautiful!

0:06:11 > 0:06:13You're not the first to notice.

0:06:13 > 0:06:16Not you. Your amazing scab!

0:06:16 > 0:06:19Stop staring at it. It's only small.

0:06:19 > 0:06:22It's gigantic! You should be proud.

0:06:22 > 0:06:25I've got more important things to obsess about.

0:06:25 > 0:06:27Dan's coming over to help me with my dance routine.

0:06:27 > 0:06:30Dance routine?

0:06:32 > 0:06:34Dance routine?

0:06:34 > 0:06:36Yes. I just did it for you?

0:06:36 > 0:06:40Oh. That was what it was.

0:06:40 > 0:06:42Why have you got a dance routine?

0:06:42 > 0:06:45Cos there's a new street dance group at school and I'm so going to be in it.

0:06:45 > 0:06:48Daniel knows all about dancing because he was in Fame at the town hall.

0:06:48 > 0:06:50Can I have your scab when it falls off?

0:06:50 > 0:06:52I need it for my collection.

0:06:52 > 0:06:55There are so many things wrong with you, Stanley Brown.

0:06:55 > 0:06:58When this comes off, it's going straight down the toilet.

0:06:58 > 0:07:01You know I can't let that happen.

0:07:01 > 0:07:03Keep away from my elbow.

0:07:06 > 0:07:09What now? I could try and bring this one back up again.

0:07:09 > 0:07:13No, thanks. We can't just let it go!

0:07:13 > 0:07:15That scab's a beauty!

0:07:15 > 0:07:18So, Samantha's skin, tell us why you should be

0:07:18 > 0:07:21Britain and Ireland's Next Top Layer Of Skin.

0:07:21 > 0:07:24Well, I think I've proved so far, in this competition,

0:07:24 > 0:07:28that I am great at keeping germs out of the body.

0:07:28 > 0:07:32Woo! You go, girl! You're going to go all the way to the top

0:07:32 > 0:07:35of the skin, and then fall off.

0:07:35 > 0:07:38Yes, but you've got to be more than just a pretty surface.

0:07:38 > 0:07:40You've got to have a bit of life in you!

0:07:40 > 0:07:45I have up to two million living organisms per square centimetre.

0:07:45 > 0:07:47Is that enough life for you?

0:07:47 > 0:07:51That is disgusting. But...

0:07:51 > 0:07:57those are just the kind of stats we're looking for on this show!

0:07:57 > 0:07:58Congratulations, Samantha!

0:07:58 > 0:08:01You need to harden your exterior because you are

0:08:01 > 0:08:04Britain and Ireland's Next Top Layer Of Skin!

0:08:04 > 0:08:08Thanks for watching, folks, and don't forget to join us in 28 days

0:08:08 > 0:08:11when this skin will be dead! We'll be looking

0:08:11 > 0:08:14for Britain and Ireland's Next, Next Top Layer Of Skin!

0:08:15 > 0:08:18- So what are we going to do? - I don't know.

0:08:18 > 0:08:22- Give up? Watch TV? - Really?- No!

0:08:22 > 0:08:26We're going... You all right, Mike? ..scab Hunting!

0:08:26 > 0:08:29Yes! I love scab hunting!

0:08:29 > 0:08:34HEROIC MUSIC PLAYS

0:08:34 > 0:08:35What's scab hunting?

0:08:39 > 0:08:44All right, men, listen up. This is the target.

0:08:44 > 0:08:46Stephanie "Scab Hoarder" Brown.

0:08:46 > 0:08:49Our information suggests she's carrying one of these.

0:08:49 > 0:08:51It's a scab. And it's a big one.

0:08:51 > 0:08:54It's already peeling off in the bottom corner,

0:08:54 > 0:08:56which means it's coming off in the next few hours.

0:08:56 > 0:08:57That doesn't give us much time.

0:08:57 > 0:09:00It gets worse. We have competition.

0:09:00 > 0:09:03I am king of the scabs.

0:09:03 > 0:09:06I've got scabs bigger than a 10p.

0:09:06 > 0:09:09I've got scabs bigger than a 50p.

0:09:09 > 0:09:11I've got scabs on my scabs.

0:09:11 > 0:09:14Stanley Brown, you ain't got nothing on me!

0:09:14 > 0:09:19Take me on and I will destroy you!

0:09:19 > 0:09:23Gabriel, are you still on your computer? It's tea time, man.

0:09:23 > 0:09:28Mum! Don't call me Gabriel, I'm recording.

0:09:29 > 0:09:32To make matters worse, the target knows we're onto her

0:09:32 > 0:09:34and she's ready for us.

0:09:34 > 0:09:38We need video of that scab uploaded to the gross-out website by 17.40.

0:09:40 > 0:09:45Twenty to six, sharp. Men, we have work to do.

0:09:45 > 0:09:49We can't just barge in there. We need to be clever about this.

0:09:49 > 0:09:50Shall I go?

0:09:53 > 0:09:55We need a secret weapon.

0:09:55 > 0:09:58Someone cunning, fearless, and unpredictable.

0:09:58 > 0:10:00Jess!

0:10:00 > 0:10:02She's not unpredictable.

0:10:03 > 0:10:05Hi-yah!

0:10:07 > 0:10:09Karate. Impressive stuff.

0:10:09 > 0:10:11Thanks, doesn't hurt to practise.

0:10:11 > 0:10:14Yes, it does!

0:10:14 > 0:10:15OK. Here's the plan.

0:10:26 > 0:10:34OK, Mike, move out. Mike? Where's he...gone?

0:10:34 > 0:10:35Hey, it's me.

0:10:35 > 0:10:39No, really? Why are you covered in plants and flowers?

0:10:39 > 0:10:45Camouflage! With this combat-camo, I can creep up on the enemy or Steph,

0:10:45 > 0:10:47completely unseen. What do you think?

0:10:47 > 0:10:49I think you're a doofus.

0:10:49 > 0:10:55Hey, Jess! See, fooled you, didn't it?

0:10:55 > 0:10:59Camouflage only works if it matches your surroundings.

0:10:59 > 0:11:03Right. Yes. Could we ask her to go outside?

0:11:03 > 0:11:08Listen, Stan said Steph is in her room. I'll execute phase one.

0:11:09 > 0:11:11The first part of the plan!

0:11:15 > 0:11:19Don't know how this is going to work with a tree following me.

0:11:23 > 0:11:27Come in, Dreamy! I mean, Daniel!

0:11:27 > 0:11:30Stepherino! GFF.

0:11:30 > 0:11:32What are you talking about?

0:11:32 > 0:11:34I've got no idea.

0:11:34 > 0:11:36I thought you might want to borrow my MP3 player.

0:11:36 > 0:11:39Why would I want to listen to your music?

0:11:39 > 0:11:40Fine. Just a thought.

0:11:40 > 0:11:43Actually, there's still quite a lot of my brother Daniel's music

0:11:43 > 0:11:46- left on here, but I'm sure you wouldn't want to...- I'll take it.

0:11:46 > 0:11:48I can work out a routine to his favourite song.

0:11:48 > 0:11:51How wonderfully nauseating. Maybe I made a mistake.

0:11:51 > 0:11:54Too late. Mine now.

0:11:57 > 0:12:00Oh, wow! He likes The Saturdays too!

0:12:03 > 0:12:07Good routine, but you know what he really loves?

0:12:07 > 0:12:08A bit of the funky chicken.

0:12:22 > 0:12:25Like giving candy to a baby.

0:12:25 > 0:12:29Psst, I'm over here, and don't you mean taking candy from a baby?

0:12:29 > 0:12:32No. They bite, and then the police come down on the baby's side,

0:12:32 > 0:12:35at least that's what happened last time.

0:12:35 > 0:12:37- Course. - Right. Time for phase two.

0:12:37 > 0:12:40I'll head downstairs and delay Daniel when he comes up.

0:12:40 > 0:12:42How're you going to do that?

0:12:42 > 0:12:46Headlock, karate chop, judo throw. There are so many ways.

0:12:46 > 0:12:48Right, you tell Stanley he can go in.

0:12:48 > 0:12:51Oh, and tell him the latest scab sighting is good to floppy,

0:12:51 > 0:12:54lower side peeling, becoming stubborn further north.

0:12:56 > 0:12:58Peeling, floppy...

0:12:58 > 0:13:02Ouch. Karate chop...

0:13:34 > 0:13:36It's me!

0:13:36 > 0:13:39Shhh! I know it's you! What's this?

0:13:39 > 0:13:42It's indoor camouflage. I'm the office.

0:13:42 > 0:13:45We don't have an office. Who has an office?

0:13:45 > 0:13:47Duck! Even if I did,

0:13:47 > 0:13:51I don't think it'd be going for a walk in my sister's bedroom.

0:13:51 > 0:13:54- Good effort though, Mike.- Thanks!

0:13:54 > 0:13:56Now go! Before she kicks you in the hole punch.

0:13:56 > 0:13:59Go check on Jess.

0:14:03 > 0:14:07Hai! Hi, Mrs Brown!

0:14:07 > 0:14:11Jessica! You scared the life out of me. What are you doing?

0:14:11 > 0:14:17I was...just looking for the way out.

0:14:17 > 0:14:21Do you use the same door that you come in from

0:14:21 > 0:14:24or do you have two different ways like restaurant kitchens or cinemas

0:14:24 > 0:14:28or some larger supermarkets?

0:14:28 > 0:14:30What were you doing?

0:14:30 > 0:14:33I was checking the car for some earrings I got for Christmas.

0:14:33 > 0:14:36Oh, the ones that look like an explosion in the glass factory?

0:14:36 > 0:14:38How do you know about my earrings?

0:14:38 > 0:14:41I must have heard someone laughing about them.

0:14:41 > 0:14:45An admiring laugh, of course. Sort of a "ha-oooh!"

0:14:45 > 0:14:49Why do you want them? Is Cash In The Attic in town?

0:14:49 > 0:14:51Oh, no. It's my aunty Phyllis gave them to me

0:14:51 > 0:14:55and I've got it into my head that she will want to see me in them.

0:14:55 > 0:14:57I mean it's probably silly.

0:14:57 > 0:14:59PHONE RINGS

0:14:59 > 0:15:01Hello?

0:15:01 > 0:15:03Auntie Phyllis, hello, hi.

0:15:03 > 0:15:07Oh, yes, I will be wearing the earrings. I love them.

0:15:07 > 0:15:11No, I'm telling the truth. I'm looking at them now.

0:15:11 > 0:15:15And I'm wearing them. How am I doing both?

0:15:15 > 0:15:19Oh, because I've got a lazy eye and it enables me

0:15:19 > 0:15:23to see round corners when the sunlight is at a certain angle.

0:15:23 > 0:15:26Oh, and I'm looking in the mirror.

0:15:26 > 0:15:30Yes, I forgot to mention that, so...

0:15:30 > 0:15:34No, I'm telling the truth. You have wonderful taste, yes.

0:15:34 > 0:15:38I'll see you, um, er. Huh.

0:15:38 > 0:15:40You really need to find them.

0:15:40 > 0:15:44I so do. Well, it's that way.

0:15:44 > 0:15:48What is? Oh, the way out.

0:15:48 > 0:15:51Yes. So it is. Thanks.

0:15:54 > 0:15:56- Hi.- Oh! Oh, Daniel!

0:15:56 > 0:15:59Hey, Mrs B. Steph invited me over.

0:15:59 > 0:16:01OK. Great.

0:16:17 > 0:16:18Go on.

0:16:18 > 0:16:22I can't! She's standing on my paper clips!

0:16:22 > 0:16:24No, no, no, Stay on mission - get the scab.

0:16:35 > 0:16:37Scab hunters never leave a man behind.

0:16:46 > 0:16:48Thank you, my friend.

0:16:48 > 0:16:51What are you two doing down there?

0:16:54 > 0:16:57- Plan B?- Plan B.

0:16:57 > 0:17:00Argh, get off, oh.

0:17:00 > 0:17:04Ouch. Oh.

0:17:04 > 0:17:08- Yes.- Right. Want my scabs, do you?

0:17:08 > 0:17:12- Get off it!- Give it! - This is my scab, Stanley Brown!

0:17:12 > 0:17:18You want a big fat juicy scab? Go get your own! This one's mine!

0:17:18 > 0:17:21Oh! Yes!

0:17:22 > 0:17:26Oh. Hi, Daniel.

0:17:26 > 0:17:29Yes.

0:17:29 > 0:17:31What happened?

0:17:36 > 0:17:40That is one awesome scab.

0:17:40 > 0:17:43Geekboy, you're goin' down.

0:17:43 > 0:17:44You ain't won yet, Stanley Brown!

0:17:44 > 0:17:47I beat you last month with my pus filled boil,

0:17:47 > 0:17:49I'll beat you this month with my scabs!

0:17:49 > 0:17:54You are nothing. I will destroy you!

0:17:56 > 0:17:58Have a nice cup of tea, dear.

0:17:58 > 0:18:00Mum!

0:18:03 > 0:18:06Well, I think you won that game of SCABble.

0:18:06 > 0:18:11In fact, I think you should take it to SCABorough,

0:18:11 > 0:18:14or even overseas to SCABdinavia.

0:18:14 > 0:18:17Where's Scabdinavia?

0:18:17 > 0:18:21We've got him beat. And in plenty of time for the deadline!

0:18:21 > 0:18:24Just need to film a quick clip of this.

0:18:24 > 0:18:28- Not so fast! I knew it was you!- What?

0:18:28 > 0:18:30- You took my crystal earrings! - But I didn't!

0:18:30 > 0:18:34Then why was one of them in your room? Explain that.

0:18:34 > 0:18:38Er, um, er.

0:19:04 > 0:19:07Sorry. Could be anywhere.

0:19:07 > 0:19:11If it helps, it's definitely in this time period.

0:19:11 > 0:19:14Well, find me that other earring.

0:19:14 > 0:19:17Mum, but if I miss the deadline, I'll lose the competition

0:19:17 > 0:19:20and Geekboy2000 will reign victorious for another month!

0:19:20 > 0:19:22That'll be six in a row!

0:19:22 > 0:19:24Victory is mine!

0:19:24 > 0:19:28I can still hear you, you know. You only turned the monitor off!

0:19:28 > 0:19:30Find it.

0:19:33 > 0:19:36Never mind, Stan. You can't win them all.

0:19:36 > 0:19:39No! I win them all!

0:19:39 > 0:19:42Will someone turn him off?

0:19:42 > 0:19:44We've still got a few hours.

0:19:44 > 0:19:49We just need to find that earring. Scab hunters, assemble!

0:19:49 > 0:19:53HEROIC MUSIC

0:19:53 > 0:19:56Wait, aren't we technically earring hunters?

0:19:56 > 0:19:59Yeah, but it sounds a bit girly.

0:19:59 > 0:20:01HEROIC MUSIC

0:20:17 > 0:20:19What are we going to do?

0:20:19 > 0:20:21Maybe he could buy her some new earrings?

0:20:21 > 0:20:23With what? He never has any money.

0:20:23 > 0:20:25Well, he could sell some of his old things.

0:20:25 > 0:20:28Felt tips with no lids.

0:20:28 > 0:20:31I already bought a load of these the other day,

0:20:31 > 0:20:35otherwise I'd have 'em off him.

0:20:35 > 0:20:37What about this rubbish old crystal making kit?

0:20:37 > 0:20:40It's not like he's ever going to need to use it.

0:20:42 > 0:20:44What?

0:20:44 > 0:20:46Stanley!

0:20:59 > 0:21:00What's this?

0:21:00 > 0:21:04And more to the point, does anyone have any more corn flakes?

0:21:07 > 0:21:09I'm having to make horrible new crystal earrings for my mum.

0:21:09 > 0:21:12Oh, wow, is it her birthday?

0:21:12 > 0:21:17Oh, no, for the scab, I remember, good plan.

0:21:17 > 0:21:20- How does it work? - Look at the instructions.

0:21:21 > 0:21:24Oh, instructiones! Old school.

0:21:28 > 0:21:29Olivia!

0:21:31 > 0:21:34Now, Archie, I'll keep it simple. A crystal is a substance

0:21:34 > 0:21:37with a highly ordered internal structure.

0:21:37 > 0:21:39This is what gives them their regularity

0:21:39 > 0:21:42and means they can be cut into nice earring-friendly shapes.

0:21:42 > 0:21:43Diamonds and rubies are crystals,

0:21:43 > 0:21:46but so are everyday substances like sugar and salt.

0:21:46 > 0:21:49You can get kits that let you make your own crystals

0:21:49 > 0:21:52containing chemicals that you dissolve in water.

0:21:52 > 0:21:56When the water evaporates, the leftover chemicals cling together

0:21:56 > 0:22:00to make your very own crystal. Ting!

0:22:00 > 0:22:03Wow.

0:22:07 > 0:22:12No... Hat! Right.

0:22:12 > 0:22:15DOORBELL RINGS Oh, Aunt Phyllis, oh, she's here!

0:22:15 > 0:22:18And she's driven, which means that she hasn't lost her sight.

0:22:18 > 0:22:20Oh, someone give me a break, oh!

0:22:20 > 0:22:23KNOCKING

0:22:23 > 0:22:27- Hi, Mum. Nice hat. - Have you found my earring?

0:22:27 > 0:22:30- Please tell me that you have found my earring?!- No, but,

0:22:30 > 0:22:32I made you a new one.

0:22:32 > 0:22:36OK, that is terrible! But it'll have to do!

0:22:36 > 0:22:38- Well?- What?

0:22:38 > 0:22:41I got you your earring. Where are my scabs?

0:22:41 > 0:22:45- Please!- I put them down somewhere on the counter.

0:22:45 > 0:22:47I saw Steph looking at them, I'm coming, I'm coming.

0:22:47 > 0:22:50Steph?

0:22:50 > 0:22:53This is going to be so brilliant! I am going to be holding my sides

0:22:53 > 0:22:57and everyone's going to be cringing, like, so much!

0:22:57 > 0:22:59Together we will destroy him!

0:22:59 > 0:23:03Steph? What are you doing with my scabs?

0:23:03 > 0:23:05They're not your scabs, Stanley. One of them's mine.

0:23:05 > 0:23:08- I'm sending a video of it to Gabriel.- Gabriel?

0:23:08 > 0:23:11- Geekboy2000.- Why?

0:23:11 > 0:23:13So he can enter it in that stupid competition.

0:23:13 > 0:23:18You have failed, my old nemesis! Behold your final humiliation!

0:23:18 > 0:23:20Steph and I are going to prom!

0:23:20 > 0:23:23My nemesis and my nemesister!?

0:23:23 > 0:23:25Seriously, we're not going to prom.

0:23:25 > 0:23:27But you're videoing your scabs for me.

0:23:27 > 0:23:31Because Stanley ruined my dance session! How am I supposed

0:23:31 > 0:23:34to get into the street dance group when my coach thinks I collect scabs?

0:23:34 > 0:23:38I wouldn't hold that against you. In fact, I'd quite like it.

0:23:38 > 0:23:40Urgh! I don't collect scabs!

0:23:40 > 0:23:41I just want you to feel what it's like to have

0:23:41 > 0:23:43someone ruin your things for you, Stanley.

0:23:43 > 0:23:45Right.

0:23:45 > 0:23:49Don't email him! Just give me one minute.

0:23:49 > 0:23:50I can fix this.

0:23:50 > 0:23:54OK, so just to be totally clear, I dumped you.

0:23:54 > 0:23:57In your dreams.

0:24:23 > 0:24:27So, did you have a nice journey down, Aunt Phyllis?

0:24:30 > 0:24:31Those earrings.

0:24:31 > 0:24:33Hmm?

0:24:33 > 0:24:34Are they the ones I got you?

0:24:34 > 0:24:36Yes.

0:24:36 > 0:24:37Aren't they awful?

0:24:37 > 0:24:40I don't know what I was thinking of when I bought them.

0:24:40 > 0:24:42Eurgh! Take them off immediately.

0:24:50 > 0:24:51Daniel's on his way.

0:24:51 > 0:24:54Great. Go up to my room, I'll meet you there.

0:24:54 > 0:24:56Hang on. Where's Mike?

0:24:58 > 0:25:01Scab hunters! It's time go undercover!

0:25:01 > 0:25:03I'm the living room!

0:25:03 > 0:25:06He never gives up, I'll give him that.

0:25:07 > 0:25:10Worst camouflage ever.

0:25:10 > 0:25:12But I got the right room and everything!

0:25:18 > 0:25:20DOORBELL RINGS

0:25:20 > 0:25:23OK, that's Daniel. Archie, thanks for doing this.

0:25:23 > 0:25:26Oh, no problem, I mean, by directly communicating with anyone but you,

0:25:26 > 0:25:29I risk the entire future of the multiverse, but hey,

0:25:29 > 0:25:32it's no biggie, scabs are scabs.

0:25:32 > 0:25:36Great, and remember, be quick and keep it simple.

0:25:36 > 0:25:40Don't worry, simple's my middle name.

0:25:43 > 0:25:46Just stay in here and I'll get your MP3 player.

0:25:46 > 0:25:50Yeah, well, hurry up, and don't tell your weird sister I'm here.

0:25:59 > 0:26:02- HIGHPITCHED VOICE: - Don't pick your nose.

0:26:02 > 0:26:04- Who said that?- The other voice!

0:26:04 > 0:26:10- DEEP VOICE:- It was me. Your conscience!

0:26:10 > 0:26:11My what?

0:26:11 > 0:26:15Your conscience! You know, the voice inside your head?

0:26:15 > 0:26:17Your inner thoughts, etc, etc.

0:26:17 > 0:26:19I have inner thoughts? For real?

0:26:19 > 0:26:23Aii. For real, blood.

0:26:23 > 0:26:28So the inner thoughts are in my blood?

0:26:28 > 0:26:29That's well freaky.

0:26:29 > 0:26:31How come I've never heard you before?

0:26:31 > 0:26:36Because you've never listened! It's time to start listening now, Daniel!

0:26:37 > 0:26:42Go and see the girl, give her another chance.

0:26:42 > 0:26:47No way, Mr Brain. She waves scabs in people's faces.

0:26:47 > 0:26:49I don't like that in a girl.

0:26:49 > 0:26:52But you do like thinking about pancakes, don't you?

0:26:52 > 0:26:56I will never let you think about them again

0:26:56 > 0:26:58unless you go upstairs and do dances with Steph.

0:26:58 > 0:27:01All right! I'm going, I'm going!

0:27:04 > 0:27:07All right. You helped a bit.

0:27:11 > 0:27:13- Woo-hoo.- So what do you get

0:27:13 > 0:27:16for winning the gross-out website Collection Of The Month?

0:27:16 > 0:27:20- Kudos. - Kudos. I love Kudos! They rock.

0:27:20 > 0:27:22It's not a band. It's a word.

0:27:22 > 0:27:25- What does it mean? - I've got no idea.

0:27:25 > 0:27:28OK, so you won.

0:27:28 > 0:27:32But don't think you're safe, Stanley Brown. This is just the beginning!

0:27:32 > 0:27:36Behold my amazing bogie ball.

0:27:36 > 0:27:41Next month belongs to me, I tell you. To me!

0:27:41 > 0:27:45Don't be too sure. Snot hunters assemble!

0:27:45 > 0:27:48HEROIC MUSIC

0:27:51 > 0:27:54Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd