0:00:02 > 0:00:04'Dear Mum. The governor's not very happy with me.
0:00:04 > 0:00:08'He told me to go to the garage, buy some ice cream and fill up his car.
0:00:08 > 0:00:10'Why he wanted his car full of ice cream, I'll never know.
0:00:10 > 0:00:13'I'm hiding in this cupboard until the show starts.
0:00:13 > 0:00:15'Maybe the great acts will distract him.
0:00:19 > 0:00:24- 'Once he's calmed down, I can try and explain.'- Where's that Gimbert?!
0:00:24 > 0:00:26Or maybe not.
0:00:27 > 0:00:30ALARM BLARES
0:00:30 > 0:00:35# You've been found guilty of a howling showbiz crime
0:00:35 > 0:00:39# So welcome to The Slammer where you're going to serve your time
0:00:39 > 0:00:43# With every type of minstrel, entertainer and artiste
0:00:43 > 0:00:48# Performing to the limit to try and get release
0:00:48 > 0:00:52# So go fetch the audience, bring them to The Slammer
0:00:52 > 0:00:56# And polish up your act with a bit of glitz and glamour
0:00:56 > 0:01:01# Your fate is in their hands so make them cheer and clamour
0:01:01 > 0:01:05# It's the only way you'll ever leave The Slammer, Slammer
0:01:05 > 0:01:09# It's the only way you'll ever leave The Slammer
0:01:10 > 0:01:14Well, Frank, that's the acts for this week's Freedom Show sorted.
0:01:14 > 0:01:18We've got Doug Segal, Panoply,
0:01:18 > 0:01:22Denis Remnev and Weapons Of Sound.
0:01:24 > 0:01:27Well, there is, er, one act you still haven't considered, sir.
0:01:28 > 0:01:31In you come, lad.
0:01:34 > 0:01:38Mr Burgess, what have I told you about mimes? I hate mimes!
0:01:38 > 0:01:41Oh, but this is different, sir. I mean, I didn't appreciate
0:01:41 > 0:01:45the transformative power of physical theatre till I met this little fella.
0:01:45 > 0:01:49I mean, look at that, sir. I'm welling up, sir.
0:01:49 > 0:01:52- All right. Be quick. - Go on, lad, do your stuff.
0:01:53 > 0:01:57Here we go. Ooh.
0:01:57 > 0:01:59Oh, he's peeling a banana.
0:01:59 > 0:02:03- Strap my ribs up. - The banana, sir, the banana!
0:02:03 > 0:02:06Yeah, I've seen enough. Mr Burgess...
0:02:06 > 0:02:09But that's a magical journey into a land of make-believe, sir.
0:02:09 > 0:02:13What's the matter with you today, Frank? Hey, listen, son,
0:02:13 > 0:02:17it doesn't matter how many windows you pretend to polish,
0:02:17 > 0:02:20how many balloons remain transfixed in mid air,
0:02:20 > 0:02:23mime is not entertaining. It's pathetic!
0:02:23 > 0:02:26You'll never get voted out of this prison. My advice to you
0:02:26 > 0:02:28is to stand still and do nothing.
0:02:28 > 0:02:31And I don't mean sprayed in gold paint.
0:02:31 > 0:02:35- That's a bit harsh, isn't it, sir? - No. You can't mess with mimes.
0:02:35 > 0:02:38Any man who paints his face with white emulsion is trouble.
0:02:38 > 0:02:42- Don't move or I'll fire! - See what I mean?
0:02:42 > 0:02:45- No need for that. - That thing's not even loaded.
0:02:47 > 0:02:52- It is now. Phooow! Doink! - Straight in Her Majesty, sir.
0:02:52 > 0:02:55OK, OK, we believe you. So what do you want?
0:02:55 > 0:03:00I want respect! For too long, mimes have been pushed into a corner,
0:03:00 > 0:03:04obstacles placed in our way, doors slammed in our faces!
0:03:05 > 0:03:09But why? Mime may not be fashionable
0:03:09 > 0:03:12but that's only because people haven't experienced
0:03:12 > 0:03:16its wondrous ability to create life...
0:03:16 > 0:03:18- HE SNIFFS - ..from thin air.
0:03:20 > 0:03:22Oh, that is beautiful, that. Isn't it, sir?
0:03:22 > 0:03:25- HE SNORES Sir!- Sorry. Dropped off for a second.
0:03:25 > 0:03:29Now look, lad, I know how you feel. Honestly, I do.
0:03:29 > 0:03:31But we can work this out.
0:03:31 > 0:03:34- Just don't do anything silly. - Like moonwalking.
0:03:34 > 0:03:37Right! That's it! My patience is over!
0:03:37 > 0:03:42- Oh, he didn't mean it. - Get in the box!- BOTH: The what?
0:03:52 > 0:03:55- The box.- Oh, you're kidding, right?
0:03:55 > 0:03:58Does this look like I'm kidding?
0:04:01 > 0:04:06- Doink! - All right. Mr Burgess, after you.
0:04:06 > 0:04:08- Disappointed, lad.- Mind your head.
0:04:08 > 0:04:11All right, all right.
0:04:18 > 0:04:22Now, let's see how you like being locked up all day!
0:04:22 > 0:04:26Look, this isn't the answer, lad. Don't throw it all away.
0:04:26 > 0:04:29You could have a dazzling career ahead of you.
0:04:29 > 0:04:33- Unlikely really, though, isn't it, Frank?- Ah.
0:04:35 > 0:04:40Ahem! I'm holding the governor of The Slammer hostage.
0:04:40 > 0:04:43Unless you send me a helicopter to get me out of here,
0:04:43 > 0:04:46give me a slot on the Royal Variety Performance
0:04:46 > 0:04:49and a bag of midget gems,
0:04:49 > 0:04:52I will force him to take part
0:04:52 > 0:04:54in a mime workshop!
0:04:54 > 0:04:57Oh, good lord, no!
0:04:58 > 0:05:02If you don't mind me asking, sir, what is it with you and mimes?
0:05:02 > 0:05:04- HE SIGHS - Ten years ago, Frank,
0:05:04 > 0:05:08I bought a little plot of land just down the road from here.
0:05:08 > 0:05:12It was my grand plan to build my dream home upon it.
0:05:12 > 0:05:16The trouble was, I tried to get the construction done on the cheap,
0:05:16 > 0:05:21cash in hand, you know. So I employed this troupe of mime artists
0:05:21 > 0:05:24who I'd just released on parole. Well, they set to work, didn't they,
0:05:24 > 0:05:28drilling and hammering and brick-laying, like they do.
0:05:28 > 0:05:31Trouble was, when they'd finished, there was nothing there!
0:05:31 > 0:05:34So I'm lumbered with a house I can't live in
0:05:34 > 0:05:38- and I can't flog it, not with the market the way it is.- I know, sir.
0:05:38 > 0:05:40- KNOCK AT DOOR - Quiet!
0:05:51 > 0:05:55I said midget gems, not sherbet pips!
0:05:55 > 0:05:57Why does nobody take mime seriously?
0:05:59 > 0:06:01Right! That's it! I've had enough!
0:06:09 > 0:06:11SHOUTING AND SCREAMING
0:06:15 > 0:06:19- Are you all right, sir?- Yeah. This is our chance. Get us out.- Right.
0:06:19 > 0:06:21HE GROANS
0:06:21 > 0:06:23It's sealed tight, sir.
0:06:23 > 0:06:26Mime something. A hammer or a drill.
0:06:26 > 0:06:29It's difficult to know what sort of tool you need for the job, sir.
0:06:29 > 0:06:33- You've got your SDS drills...- It doesn't matter what type of drill!
0:06:33 > 0:06:36- Just get going!- All right, sir. I'll try the hammer drill.
0:06:36 > 0:06:39- Hammer drill... Go on, hurry up! - HE IMITATES DRILL
0:06:39 > 0:06:42- Hurry up, I think he's coming back. - Oh, that's torn it.
0:06:42 > 0:06:45- It's broken the bit, sir. - What?- I knew that wasn't right...
0:06:45 > 0:06:50Never mind about the bit! Mime a laser or a bulldozer or something.
0:06:50 > 0:06:56- All right, sir.- Hurry up.- Leave it with me, sir.- Oh, good grief.
0:06:57 > 0:07:01- He'll be back in a minute. Chisel harder.- You can't rush this, sir.
0:07:01 > 0:07:05- Morning!- Gimbert! Come back here!
0:07:05 > 0:07:07- What are you doing? - I'm sorry about your car, Uncle,
0:07:07 > 0:07:12- but you should've specified... - Never mind about my car! Get us out!
0:07:12 > 0:07:14- Agh!- You need the key!
0:07:14 > 0:07:18- What key?- That key! - Where?- BOTH: There!
0:07:19 > 0:07:24- Where?- Oh, for goodness sake, here! There!- Oh.- Quick.
0:07:24 > 0:07:27Open that door. Hurry up.
0:07:27 > 0:07:29Come on, lad, hurry up, hurry up!
0:07:31 > 0:07:34- What is going on?- Ah...
0:07:38 > 0:07:40You, in the box also.
0:07:40 > 0:07:43That's all we need, Gimbert.
0:07:43 > 0:07:48Right, I've had enough of this. You wanted a spot on the Freedom Show,
0:07:48 > 0:07:51- you've got it.- But sir...- Yippee! - ALARM BLARES
0:07:51 > 0:07:54- Now, come on, get us out of here. Gimbert, go on.- Whoo-hoo!
0:07:54 > 0:07:57- Mind your head. Oh!- Sir.
0:07:57 > 0:08:00You can't allow people to force their way onto the Freedom Show.
0:08:00 > 0:08:02Frank, I've got a plan. Leave it to me.
0:08:02 > 0:08:05- How do I look?- BOTH: Divine. - Thank you very much.
0:08:05 > 0:08:07In that case, it's show time.
0:08:13 > 0:08:16Hello? I have to whisper. It's an emergency.
0:08:16 > 0:08:20'Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to HMP Slammer,
0:08:20 > 0:08:23'where you decide which prisoner is to be released!
0:08:23 > 0:08:25'Now please welcome your host,
0:08:25 > 0:08:28'here you go, watch this...
0:08:30 > 0:08:31'Time!
0:08:34 > 0:08:38'Mime! It's the Governor!'
0:08:38 > 0:08:41CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:08:52 > 0:08:56- Who's the governor? - ALL: You're the governor!
0:08:56 > 0:08:59Oh, what fabulous jailors and jailbirds we've got here.
0:08:59 > 0:09:03- And what a fabulous Freedom Show we've got for you!- ALL: Ooooh!
0:09:03 > 0:09:05We have got, to kick the whole show off,
0:09:05 > 0:09:12jailors and jailbirds, a mind-reading act. It is Doug Segal!
0:09:12 > 0:09:15CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:09:18 > 0:09:21Hello, I'm Doug Segal and I'm a mind-reader.
0:09:21 > 0:09:23ALL: Ooooh!
0:09:23 > 0:09:26Mr Burgess, please would you join me?
0:09:26 > 0:09:30- Oh, very good.- All right, for the good of the show, sir.- Thank you.
0:09:30 > 0:09:32- Just come and stand here. - Just here?- Excellent.
0:09:32 > 0:09:36- Would you tell everyone what that is?- That, sir, is a rook.
0:09:36 > 0:09:39The first game is, you know when you're in the school yard
0:09:39 > 0:09:42when you would take something behind your back, choose a hand for it,
0:09:42 > 0:09:46then the other person guesses which hand it's in. Do that for me now.
0:09:46 > 0:09:49Bring your hands out. Lovely. You have a watch on this hand
0:09:49 > 0:09:51- which means that you're right-handed.- I am, yes.
0:09:51 > 0:09:55So it'll be in your right hand. Please show them I'm correct. Good.
0:09:55 > 0:10:00Too easy. Too easy. We're going to introduce two new pieces.
0:10:00 > 0:10:05- The bishop.- Excellent. And this is the... Don't say horsey!
0:10:05 > 0:10:08- The knight.- Good. Choose one of them, hide the other two in your pocket.
0:10:08 > 0:10:11I'll turn around. Do that now, please.
0:10:12 > 0:10:16Lovely. Hands out. I think you are holding the...
0:10:17 > 0:10:21- ..knight in this hand. Am I correct? - He's very good. There it is.
0:10:21 > 0:10:24CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:10:24 > 0:10:27That's not even the good bit! Come and stand here.
0:10:27 > 0:10:30Would you please lay the three pieces out in a row for me?
0:10:30 > 0:10:33Excellent. You're going to make three choices.
0:10:33 > 0:10:35Please make them as swiftly as you can.
0:10:35 > 0:10:39The only way I can influence you is to make a few minor adjustments.
0:10:39 > 0:10:43Please reach out with your left hand and pick a piece up.
0:10:43 > 0:10:45Reach out with your right hand and pick a piece up.
0:10:45 > 0:10:50Pass me one. Thank you very much. That is the rook. Excellent.
0:10:50 > 0:10:54Now, choose one for me and one for you. Final choice.
0:10:54 > 0:10:57- Do you want to swap with me?- Yes.
0:10:57 > 0:11:01Very well. Please could you just describe to everyone the situation?
0:11:01 > 0:11:05Doug is holding the bishop, I am holding the knight
0:11:05 > 0:11:09- and in the glass is the rook. - Excellent.
0:11:09 > 0:11:12Could you please get me the envelope?
0:11:12 > 0:11:16Just tip the contents out onto the table as swiftly as you can.
0:11:16 > 0:11:21Inside there is another envelope. It's been there since the beginning.
0:11:21 > 0:11:23Absolute fingertips. One piece of paper in there.
0:11:23 > 0:11:26Take it out and read it aloud.
0:11:27 > 0:11:30It says, "Doug is holding the bishop.
0:11:30 > 0:11:33"Mr Burgess," that's me, "is holding the knight.
0:11:33 > 0:11:37"And the rook is in the glass." There we go.
0:11:37 > 0:11:40CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:11:40 > 0:11:42Off! Get him off!
0:11:46 > 0:11:48Mystifying! Did you know how he did it?
0:11:48 > 0:11:52Let's find out with the power of the mind and Mr Burgess.
0:11:52 > 0:11:55We can put a man on the moon, we can put yoghurt into tubes,
0:11:55 > 0:11:59- but how did he do that?- Well, I think he was out of this world.
0:11:59 > 0:12:03- In what way out of this world, miss? - Well, I think nobody in this world
0:12:03 > 0:12:07- can read minds except for him.- Shall we let him go from The Slammer?
0:12:07 > 0:12:11- Yes.- But he'll go out reading people's minds, causing chaos!
0:12:11 > 0:12:13- I think he'll be good. - I can read your mind, sir.
0:12:13 > 0:12:16- How old are you, sir?- Ten.
0:12:16 > 0:12:20That is correct! I've read your mind! Are you impressed, sir?
0:12:20 > 0:12:26- Yep. That was amazing.- One final word, sum that act up for me, sir.
0:12:26 > 0:12:30- Chesserrific.- Chesserrific, sir.
0:12:31 > 0:12:35Well, jailors and jailbirds, another performing prisoner act to see.
0:12:35 > 0:12:37Let's hear it, please, for panoply!
0:12:37 > 0:12:41CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:12:44 > 0:12:47DANCE MUSIC
0:12:50 > 0:12:53AUDIENCE: Ohh!
0:12:55 > 0:12:58CHEERING
0:13:00 > 0:13:02CHEERING
0:13:09 > 0:13:12CHEERING
0:13:17 > 0:13:20AUDIENCE: Whoaaa!
0:13:24 > 0:13:27AUDIENCE: Oooh!
0:13:33 > 0:13:36CHEERING
0:13:41 > 0:13:44CHEERING
0:13:49 > 0:13:51CHEERING
0:13:54 > 0:13:57SCREAMING
0:14:08 > 0:14:11CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:14:14 > 0:14:16CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:14:18 > 0:14:21Take that! But the only poll that really matters
0:14:21 > 0:14:25is the one that we conduct with you, leading off with Mr Burgess.
0:14:25 > 0:14:29Panoply. But were they at the top-oly or right at the bottom-y?
0:14:29 > 0:14:34I thought it was fantastical, cos no-one could ever climb a pole.
0:14:34 > 0:14:37Well, they just did, sir. THEY LAUGH
0:14:37 > 0:14:39They had special shoes on.
0:14:39 > 0:14:42- Special shoes, sir? Is that how it's done?- Yeah.
0:14:42 > 0:14:45- Have you got special shoes, sir? - No.- No?
0:14:45 > 0:14:48- HE LAUGHS - Did you like that performing act?
0:14:48 > 0:14:51- Yes.- The kind of act that should be released from prison?
0:14:51 > 0:14:55- Definitely.- Why's that, madam? - Because they were doing things
0:14:55 > 0:14:59that no-one would ever do, like climb up poles and then fall down.
0:14:59 > 0:15:04- I thought they'd go splat.- Yeah.- One final word, sum that act up, miss.
0:15:04 > 0:15:07- Remarkable.- Remarkable, sir!
0:15:07 > 0:15:10Jailors and jailbirds, it is now time for that special act
0:15:10 > 0:15:13that we call Solitary Confinement!
0:15:13 > 0:15:16SCREAMING
0:15:16 > 0:15:20Ohh! We allow them out for one chance
0:15:20 > 0:15:23at not freedom, cos we can't let them go, they're too naughty,
0:15:23 > 0:15:25but if they do well, they get a little treat.
0:15:25 > 0:15:29I'm not sure what the little treat is today, but whatever it is,
0:15:29 > 0:15:32they'll be thrilled. If they get the thumbs down, though,
0:15:32 > 0:15:35they go back to the cell for a cruel and unusual punishment.
0:15:35 > 0:15:40Mr Burgess! What is today's cruel and unusual punishment?
0:15:40 > 0:15:43Today, sir, it's to be basted in soy sauce
0:15:43 > 0:15:45and lightly grilled on both sides
0:15:45 > 0:15:48whilst singing Tie My Kangaroo Down, Sport.
0:15:48 > 0:15:53Ooh! Well, we need, as ever, a judge for Solitary Confinement.
0:15:53 > 0:15:55- Mr Burgess, you know a good character.- You, miss?
0:15:55 > 0:15:58Yes, she's coming up. Give her a round of applause.
0:15:58 > 0:16:01- APPLAUSE - What's your name?
0:16:01 > 0:16:06- Habiba.- Have you got a thumb? Good. That's all you need to be the judge.
0:16:06 > 0:16:11Cos it's time for Solitary Confinement! Here we go.
0:16:19 > 0:16:23# Rubber ball, I come bouncing back to you
0:16:23 > 0:16:26# Rubber ball, I come bouncing back to you
0:16:26 > 0:16:28# Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh
0:16:28 > 0:16:31Bouncy, bouncy.
0:16:31 > 0:16:35# Rubber ball, I come bouncing back to you
0:16:35 > 0:16:39# Rubber ball, I come bouncing back to you
0:16:39 > 0:16:41Bouncy, bouncy.
0:16:41 > 0:16:43THEY LAUGH
0:16:43 > 0:16:47# Bouncy, bouncy, bouncy, bouncy
0:16:47 > 0:16:50# Bouncy, bouncy, bouncy, bouncy
0:16:50 > 0:16:52# Eee-ee-ee
0:16:52 > 0:16:54Bouncy, bouncy.
0:16:54 > 0:16:56LAUGHTER
0:16:56 > 0:17:00# Bouncy, bouncy, bouncy, bouncy
0:17:00 > 0:17:03# Bouncy, bouncy, bouncy, bouncy
0:17:03 > 0:17:06# Eee-ee-ee
0:17:06 > 0:17:08Bouncy, bouncy.
0:17:08 > 0:17:11- LAUGHTER - Get him off.
0:17:12 > 0:17:16There we are. Yes. Habiba, you've got to decide.
0:17:16 > 0:17:18Remember, thumbs up, he'll be thrilled.
0:17:18 > 0:17:21Thumbs down, soy sauce and well grilled.
0:17:21 > 0:17:24So you've got five seconds to decide, Habiba.
0:17:24 > 0:17:26It's going to be a thumbs...
0:17:30 > 0:17:34..down! Ohh! Back to the cell!
0:17:34 > 0:17:36There we are. Yes. Thank you, Habiba.
0:17:36 > 0:17:39Back in the cell. There we are.
0:17:39 > 0:17:41- Ow! Ow! - SIZZLING
0:17:41 > 0:17:43# Tie me kangaroo down... Ow!
0:17:43 > 0:17:47- # Tie me... Ow! Oooooh! - SIZZLING
0:17:47 > 0:17:49THEY LAUGH
0:17:49 > 0:17:53Now onto an extra act for you. I'll call it a treat, except it's not.
0:17:53 > 0:17:55It's mime. Oh, joy of joys.
0:17:55 > 0:18:00Would you please show some appreciation for Theatre du Fromage!
0:18:00 > 0:18:03CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:18:08 > 0:18:11FRENCH ACCORDION MUSIC
0:18:21 > 0:18:26- Right, go and get him.- Whooooo! - That's it.- Tactical mime units!
0:18:26 > 0:18:30- Arrest that mime!- We are arresting this mime for unlawful abduction
0:18:30 > 0:18:33and imprisonment in a mime box.
0:18:33 > 0:18:35Now, get in the back of the van!
0:18:35 > 0:18:38Get him in that van, you lot! Right, hold on a second.
0:18:38 > 0:18:42- HE IMITATES VAN ENGINE - Good work, lads.
0:18:42 > 0:18:46Take him away. Yes, that's it. Off he goes. Bye-bye.
0:18:47 > 0:18:50The next act, he flies through the air with the greatest of ease.
0:18:50 > 0:18:53The perfect act to see after a load of old cheese.
0:18:53 > 0:18:58- It is Denis Remnev! - CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:19:09 > 0:19:11AUDIENCE: Whooo!
0:19:11 > 0:19:13ROCK MUSIC
0:19:20 > 0:19:23CHEERING AND SCREAMING
0:19:36 > 0:19:39CHEERING AND SCREAMING
0:19:42 > 0:19:44THEY SCREAM
0:19:45 > 0:19:48SCREAMING
0:19:51 > 0:19:53CHEERING AND SCREAMING
0:20:02 > 0:20:05CHEERING
0:20:06 > 0:20:08CHEERING
0:20:13 > 0:20:16CHEERING
0:20:16 > 0:20:19SCREAMING
0:20:20 > 0:20:23CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:20:26 > 0:20:29CHEERING
0:20:34 > 0:20:36SCREAMING
0:20:47 > 0:20:49CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:20:56 > 0:21:00Did he do enough to go swinging free from The Slammer?
0:21:00 > 0:21:05Or...is his career back on the ropes? Let's find out from you lot.
0:21:05 > 0:21:09Denis Remnev. Death-defying, miss?
0:21:09 > 0:21:12I thought it was great. I was holding my breath
0:21:12 > 0:21:15and sitting on the edge of my seat the whole time. I was really scared
0:21:15 > 0:21:19when he swung upside down. I didn't know anyone had so much courage.
0:21:19 > 0:21:22- Do you think he should be released? - Yeah, I think he should.
0:21:22 > 0:21:26- I think he deserves to go. - What did you think of that act, sir?
0:21:26 > 0:21:29I don't know anyone brave enough to do that.
0:21:29 > 0:21:31Especially in those leather trousers.
0:21:31 > 0:21:34- THEY LAUGH - Yeah. They must feel itchy.- Yeah.
0:21:34 > 0:21:38That's the first thing. Get over the itchiness and then press on.
0:21:38 > 0:21:41Now then, sir, heart in your mouth or poo in your pants?
0:21:41 > 0:21:44- THEY LAUGH - Poo in my pants.
0:21:44 > 0:21:48- THEY LAUGH Yes.- It was really scary
0:21:48 > 0:21:51- and quite breathtaking. - Right. You enjoyed it, sir?- Yeah.
0:21:51 > 0:21:55- What did you think of that act? - I thought, whenever he stood up,
0:21:55 > 0:21:58he was literally going to fall on top of everybody.
0:21:58 > 0:22:00- But it was just amazing. - So he's going free?
0:22:00 > 0:22:05- Definitely.- OK.- Right, one final word. Sum that act up for me, sir.
0:22:05 > 0:22:07HE SIGHS
0:22:07 > 0:22:10Well, I think that's it, sir, yeah. HE SIGHS
0:22:10 > 0:22:14The next act, what an interesting act. An act with a lot of rhythm.
0:22:14 > 0:22:19Anyway, here they are in The Slammer, it is Weapons Of Sound!
0:22:19 > 0:22:22CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:22:30 > 0:22:33THEY BEAT RHYTHMICALLY
0:22:37 > 0:22:40THEY CLAP
0:23:23 > 0:23:25Whoo!
0:23:30 > 0:23:32TEMPO SLOWS
0:23:44 > 0:23:47TEMPO SPEEDS UP
0:24:01 > 0:24:04- Oh, yeah! - CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:24:04 > 0:24:07Oh! Weapons Of Sound there!
0:24:07 > 0:24:10Whoa! Marvellous.
0:24:10 > 0:24:12But will they be skipping out of here?
0:24:12 > 0:24:15- Let's find out. What did you think? - Let's crack on.
0:24:15 > 0:24:20- Sir!- Erm, I thought it was amazing and ear-busting
0:24:20 > 0:24:23and the guy with the Mohican looked really creepy.
0:24:23 > 0:24:27- The guy with the Mohican looked really creepy?- He had cow trousers.
0:24:27 > 0:24:30- THEY LAUGH - Weapons Of Sound.
0:24:30 > 0:24:33- What did you think of them? - Erm, they had a very good rhythm
0:24:33 > 0:24:38- and they were doing solos. - Would you like to see them go free
0:24:38 > 0:24:41- and release their rhythms on the world?- Yes.- Good to hear.
0:24:41 > 0:24:45- Miss, what did you think of that act? - I thought it was really good
0:24:45 > 0:24:48how they made recycled things into instruments.
0:24:48 > 0:24:50- You thought that was entertaining? - Yeah.
0:24:50 > 0:24:53- And you'd like to see it outside of this prison.- Yeah.- OK.
0:24:53 > 0:24:57- What did you think of them? - I thought it was weirdly amazing.
0:24:57 > 0:24:59They make a heck of a noise in The Slammer
0:24:59 > 0:25:03- when we have our sloppy porridge at night.- Er, that's not my problem.
0:25:03 > 0:25:05THEY LAUGH
0:25:05 > 0:25:08You sound like a politician of the future, sir, you do.
0:25:08 > 0:25:11- Or maybe you could be like Mr Burgess.- Yeah!- Yes.
0:25:11 > 0:25:14- Do a Mr Burgess impression. Mr Burgess!- Sir?
0:25:14 > 0:25:16- THEY LAUGH - Very good.
0:25:16 > 0:25:20- Miss, could you sum that act up for me in one final word?- Amazing.
0:25:20 > 0:25:23- Amazing, sir. - Well, jailors and jailbirds,
0:25:23 > 0:25:26time to decide who's going free. Let's welcome back all the acts!
0:25:26 > 0:25:29- Come on! Let's hear it for them! - CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:25:29 > 0:25:33Doug Segal! Panoply!
0:25:33 > 0:25:35Let's have them back here.
0:25:35 > 0:25:39- Denis Remnev and Weapons Of Sound. - CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:25:39 > 0:25:43Marvellous. Four very different performing prisoner acts
0:25:43 > 0:25:47hoping to go free. We'll decide with this, Gimbert's Clap-o-meter.
0:25:47 > 0:25:51The more noise you make, the higher the score on the Clap-o-meter.
0:25:51 > 0:25:55The first act was mind-boggling. Will he be going free?
0:25:55 > 0:25:58Let's hear it, please, for Doug Segal!
0:25:58 > 0:26:00CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:26:00 > 0:26:05They're clapping for Doug. Oh, Doug, just 53 there.
0:26:05 > 0:26:0953 points. Back you go. I think you might be staying in The Slammer.
0:26:09 > 0:26:13Next, let's hear it, please, for Panoply!
0:26:13 > 0:26:15CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:26:18 > 0:26:22Well, 90.7. Wow! Show offs.
0:26:22 > 0:26:24Look at that. Brilliant!
0:26:24 > 0:26:29On next to a wonderful act. Let's hear it, please, for Denis Remnev!
0:26:29 > 0:26:32- CHEERING AND APPLAUSE - We like him.
0:26:32 > 0:26:34Good score.
0:26:34 > 0:26:37Oh, Denis, you'll have to go back on your rope. Back into your cell,
0:26:37 > 0:26:43because you got 84.7. At the moment, in the lead is Panoply.
0:26:43 > 0:26:45Just one performing prisoner act to go.
0:26:45 > 0:26:48Let's hear it, please, for Weapons Of Sound!
0:26:48 > 0:26:51- CHEERING AND APPLAUSE - Ohh!
0:26:55 > 0:26:58They're going free! Yes, a dramatic win at the end.
0:26:58 > 0:27:02Just got into the lead with 91.6 over Panoply,
0:27:02 > 0:27:06it's Weapons Of Sound! You're free! You're free!
0:27:06 > 0:27:08- Off you go! Go on! Take them away! - CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:27:08 > 0:27:12There they go. But the good news is,
0:27:12 > 0:27:15although you're staying in The Slammer, you're in time for tea.
0:27:15 > 0:27:20- Mrs Burgess, what's for tea tonight? - That'll be Chef texting me now.
0:27:20 > 0:27:23- Oh, it's incomplete, sir. - Really?- Yes.
0:27:23 > 0:27:26- It just says, "Sloppy-plo..." - Ooh, I wonder what that could be.
0:27:26 > 0:27:30- Take them away, Mr Burgess. I think we know.- This way.- Go on!
0:27:30 > 0:27:33Sloppy-ploppy porridge yet again. Oh, never mind.
0:27:33 > 0:27:36CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:27:36 > 0:27:39See you soon for another Freedom Show on The Slammer!
0:27:39 > 0:27:41Goodbye, jailors and jailbirds! Bye-bye!
0:27:41 > 0:27:44CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:27:48 > 0:27:53# It's the only way you'll ever leave The Slammer
0:27:53 > 0:27:55Well, thank heaven that's over.
0:27:55 > 0:27:58Now, I do not want any more mime in this prison.
0:27:58 > 0:28:02So, er, who fancies a nice...
0:28:02 > 0:28:06Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd
0:28:06 > 0:28:10E-mail subtitling@bbc.co.uk
0:28:10 > 0:28:10.