Buzzkill the Human Fly

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0:00:02 > 0:00:05'Dear Sir, I wish to complain about the quality of your confectionary.

0:00:05 > 0:00:07' Your sherbet dib dabs are neither dibby, nor dabby.

0:00:07 > 0:00:11'Your cola cubes are not nearly cola-y or cubey enough,

0:00:11 > 0:00:13'and as for your pear drops, their standard has, well...

0:00:13 > 0:00:18'dropped. How is a man supposed to enjoy his afternoon sweet treat?

0:00:18 > 0:00:20'Talking of treats,

0:00:20 > 0:00:23'in this week's Freedom Show we had some right liquorice allsorts.

0:00:23 > 0:00:26- 'One very tasty...' - # All right...! #

0:00:26 > 0:00:29'One gave us something to chew over...

0:00:29 > 0:00:30'And one totally sucked.'

0:00:30 > 0:00:32Ya divvy!

0:00:32 > 0:00:35'In conclusion, until you take my complaints more seriously,

0:00:35 > 0:00:38'I shall not be consuming any more of your sweeties.'

0:00:39 > 0:00:40Ah!

0:00:47 > 0:00:51# You've been found guilty of a howling showbiz crime

0:00:51 > 0:00:55# So welcome to The Slammer where you're gonna serve your time

0:00:55 > 0:01:00# With every type of minstrel, entertainer and artiste

0:01:00 > 0:01:04# Performing to the limit to try and get released

0:01:04 > 0:01:08# So go and fetch the audience, bring them to The Slammer

0:01:08 > 0:01:13# And polish up your act with a bit of glitz and glamour

0:01:13 > 0:01:18# Your fate is in their hands, so make them cheer and clamour

0:01:18 > 0:01:21# It's the only way you'll ever leave The Slammer

0:01:21 > 0:01:26# It's the only way you'll ever leave The Slammer! #

0:01:29 > 0:01:32A human fly? I don't like the sound of that.

0:01:32 > 0:01:35- What's he in for?- Mr Buzzkill was brought to the Slammer last night,

0:01:35 > 0:01:37sir, after vomiting over confectionary

0:01:37 > 0:01:39while filming an advert for a bag of sweets.

0:01:39 > 0:01:42Yeah, they had to change the name to Sick'n'Mix.

0:01:42 > 0:01:44Horrible mess.

0:01:44 > 0:01:45Well, keep him away from me -

0:01:45 > 0:01:48it's The Freedom Show today and I hate insects!

0:01:48 > 0:01:50Darrgh!!!

0:01:50 > 0:01:52Must fly! Bzzz!

0:01:52 > 0:01:55- You two, catch that fly! - Leave it with us, sir.

0:01:55 > 0:01:58Ah, yes, this should get 'im!

0:01:58 > 0:02:02Are you sure human fly spray is such a good idea, Mr Burgess?

0:02:02 > 0:02:06Absolutely, there's only one way to deal with a pest like 'im.

0:02:06 > 0:02:08- He's not a pest, he's a prisoner. - Bzzz!

0:02:08 > 0:02:11There he is! Charge!

0:02:11 > 0:02:13Spray goodbye, Buzzkill!

0:02:13 > 0:02:16- Ha-ha-ha-ha!- Agh! Agh!

0:02:16 > 0:02:18A-a-a-gh!

0:02:18 > 0:02:21Are you OK, sir?

0:02:21 > 0:02:23What do you think?! Get after him!

0:02:23 > 0:02:25Hu-u-ugh!

0:02:25 > 0:02:27Ha! Gotcha!

0:02:27 > 0:02:30W-what's the matter, Buzzkill?

0:02:30 > 0:02:33I'm absolutely inconsolable.

0:02:33 > 0:02:37- Inconsolable?- I simply cannot stand being cooped up like this.

0:02:37 > 0:02:40I'm a fly. You know - fish gotta swim,

0:02:40 > 0:02:43- fly gotta fly.- Couldn't you just try being human?

0:02:43 > 0:02:48Oh, the very idea! I did once consider becoming a human mosquito.

0:02:48 > 0:02:50But that sucked. And then a human spider.

0:02:50 > 0:02:54- Well, that's got legs...- It's very sweet of you to say, dear girl.

0:02:54 > 0:02:57But it's no good. I'm a fly through and through,

0:02:57 > 0:03:00and I have to get out! Bzz...!

0:03:00 > 0:03:02Don't do that, Mr Buzzkill!

0:03:02 > 0:03:05Look, I'll have a word with The Governor.

0:03:05 > 0:03:07But you must keep quiet - Mr Burgess is after you!

0:03:10 > 0:03:13All right, Mr Fly -

0:03:13 > 0:03:16you've messed with the wrong senior prison officer this time!

0:03:18 > 0:03:20Fly paper!

0:03:20 > 0:03:22That will bring you to a sticky end.

0:03:26 > 0:03:29Mr Burgess! Frank!

0:03:29 > 0:03:32MAN GROANS

0:03:34 > 0:03:36- Ugh!- Sah?

0:03:37 > 0:03:40- I'm stuck! - Sah! Ah, don't worry, sir.

0:03:40 > 0:03:42I'll have you unstuck before you can say Freedom Show.

0:03:42 > 0:03:45You'd better. It starts in a few minutes. Careful, Frank.

0:03:45 > 0:03:49- Oh, watch it. Ooh!- Wait a minute... Bit more purchase...

0:03:49 > 0:03:51Steady! Steady! Oooh!

0:03:55 > 0:03:57BOTH: Meadows!

0:03:57 > 0:04:00Buzzkill, do you have any skills other than being a human fly?

0:04:00 > 0:04:03Well, although I say so myself,

0:04:03 > 0:04:06I buzz a magnificent national anthem.

0:04:06 > 0:04:09HE BUZZES THE NATIONAL ANTHEM

0:04:09 > 0:04:11No! No, stop!

0:04:11 > 0:04:13No! No! Stop!

0:04:13 > 0:04:17You can't get out unless you win the Freedom Show!

0:04:17 > 0:04:20This means you might be here... forever!

0:04:21 > 0:04:24Zzz, zzz, zzzz!

0:04:24 > 0:04:26Bzzzzz...!

0:04:26 > 0:04:30- SIREN SOUNDS - Frank?- Huh?- How do I look? - Delightful, sir.- Thank you very much.

0:04:30 > 0:04:33- SIRENS AND WHISTLES SOUND - Then it's...show time!

0:04:36 > 0:04:39Ladies and gentlemen - welcome to HMP Slammer,

0:04:39 > 0:04:42where you decide which prisoner is to be released.

0:04:42 > 0:04:45Now, please welcome your host,

0:04:45 > 0:04:48uno, dos, tres, cuatro, cinco, cinco, seis,

0:04:48 > 0:04:50he's pretty fly for a white guy -

0:04:50 > 0:04:53it's The Governor!

0:04:53 > 0:04:58CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

0:05:08 > 0:05:10Who's The Governor?

0:05:10 > 0:05:12ALL: You're The Governor!

0:05:12 > 0:05:16Oh, yes, my little jailers and jailbirds. It's great to see you

0:05:16 > 0:05:18for another Freedom Show here at The Slammer,

0:05:18 > 0:05:21and what acts we've got for you. We've got a fabulous band,

0:05:21 > 0:05:24going to get you rocking, called Union J!!

0:05:24 > 0:05:27WHOOPING AND CHEERING

0:05:27 > 0:05:32A most unusual body-popping act called Duplicate.

0:05:32 > 0:05:35WHOOPING AND CHEERING

0:05:35 > 0:05:38And an act that will have you gasping with disbelief,

0:05:38 > 0:05:40Jarrett & Raja!

0:05:40 > 0:05:42WHOOPING AND CHEERING

0:05:42 > 0:05:45But what an opening act we've got for you here today,

0:05:45 > 0:05:48jailers and jailbirds - the brilliant talents

0:05:48 > 0:05:52of the never-ending story of Peter Pan!

0:05:55 > 0:06:00CHEERING

0:06:05 > 0:06:10DRAMATIC ORCHESTRAL MUSIC PLAYS

0:06:26 > 0:06:31# One day I'll fly away

0:06:34 > 0:06:37# Leave all this to

0:06:39 > 0:06:40# Yesterday

0:06:42 > 0:06:49# One day I'll fly away

0:06:49 > 0:06:52# One day I'll fly

0:06:53 > 0:06:55# Fly

0:06:55 > 0:06:57# Away!

0:06:58 > 0:07:04- MUSIC: "Nessun Dorma" by Puccini - # Ma il mio mistero e chiuso in me

0:07:05 > 0:07:09# Il nome mio nessun sapra

0:07:09 > 0:07:12# No, no

0:07:12 > 0:07:18# Dilegua, o notte!

0:07:18 > 0:07:22# Tramontate, stelle!

0:07:22 > 0:07:28# Tramontate, stelle!

0:07:28 > 0:07:35# All'alba vincero!

0:07:35 > 0:07:39# Vincero

0:07:39 > 0:07:50# Vince-ro! #

0:07:55 > 0:08:01DRAMATIC, PERCUSSIVE MUSIC

0:08:01 > 0:08:04SHOUTS AND GRUNTS

0:08:04 > 0:08:06Oh!

0:08:07 > 0:08:13# And through it all, she offers me protection

0:08:13 > 0:08:17# A lot of love and affection

0:08:17 > 0:08:20# Whether I'm right or wrong

0:08:20 > 0:08:23# She won't forsake me

0:08:25 > 0:08:29# I'm loving angels instead

0:08:32 > 0:08:35# You raise me up

0:08:35 > 0:08:41# So I can stand on mountains

0:08:41 > 0:08:43# You raise me up

0:08:43 > 0:08:49# To walk on stormy seas

0:08:50 > 0:08:52# I am strong

0:08:52 > 0:08:57# When I am on your shoulders

0:08:58 > 0:09:00# You raise me up

0:09:00 > 0:09:07# To more than I can be

0:09:11 > 0:09:14# You raise me up

0:09:16 > 0:09:18# To more

0:09:18 > 0:09:20# Than I

0:09:22 > 0:09:26# Can be... #

0:09:26 > 0:09:28Hah!

0:09:31 > 0:09:36APPLAUSE AND CHEERING

0:09:36 > 0:09:39Come on, let's hear it for that!

0:09:39 > 0:09:41Wow!

0:09:41 > 0:09:44The spectacular story, the never-ending story,

0:09:44 > 0:09:47of Peter Pan. But will he return to Never Never,

0:09:47 > 0:09:51or stay in The Slammer for ever and ever? Let's find out,

0:09:51 > 0:09:54- with Mr Burgess!- Right, Miss, what did you make of Peter Pan?

0:09:54 > 0:09:58I thought it was brilliant, and I've never seen anything like it before.

0:09:58 > 0:10:02And I especially loved all the people that were doing

0:10:02 > 0:10:04the dancing and the acting and the singing.

0:10:04 > 0:10:07What was your favourite part of Peter Pan?

0:10:07 > 0:10:12Erm, it was when the pirates were fighting the Lost Boys.

0:10:12 > 0:10:16Oh, those pirates? Did you like Captain Hook?

0:10:16 > 0:10:20- I think he should be fed to the crocodile.- Ooh!

0:10:20 > 0:10:23One final word - sum that act up for me, please, Miss.

0:10:23 > 0:10:27- Triple threats. - Triple threats, sah! Marvellous!

0:10:27 > 0:10:30Well, Peter Pan could be going free.

0:10:30 > 0:10:33On now to a fabulous band, a boy band.

0:10:33 > 0:10:36They're hoping to get out of The Slammer, or they'll end up

0:10:36 > 0:10:38a very old man band! Jailers and jailbirds,

0:10:38 > 0:10:41let's hear some noise for Union J!

0:10:41 > 0:10:46SCREAMING

0:10:49 > 0:10:52GUITAR INTRO STARTS

0:10:52 > 0:10:56CHEERING

0:10:59 > 0:11:03# She sees the world through TV screens

0:11:05 > 0:11:08# All of her friends in magazines

0:11:10 > 0:11:14# But there's a lot behind those big blue eyes

0:11:14 > 0:11:17# She just don't realise

0:11:20 > 0:11:24# Everybody's gone and lost their mind

0:11:24 > 0:11:27# It's just the days we live in

0:11:27 > 0:11:30# Most of the time

0:11:31 > 0:11:33# Get up out of the dark

0:11:33 > 0:11:35# Open up your eyes

0:11:35 > 0:11:39# You'll discover there's a world outside

0:11:40 > 0:11:43# To fix a broken heart

0:11:43 > 0:11:45# You have to try

0:11:45 > 0:11:48# Pick it up, pick it up It's a beautiful life

0:11:48 > 0:11:53# Beautiful li-ife

0:11:53 > 0:11:55# Beautiful life

0:12:00 > 0:12:05# We're not so different, you and I

0:12:05 > 0:12:10# Everybody's got a place to hide

0:12:10 > 0:12:14# But it's just the days we live in

0:12:16 > 0:12:18# Oooh

0:12:18 > 0:12:21# Most of the time

0:12:21 > 0:12:23- # Get up out of the dark - Get up out of the dark

0:12:23 > 0:12:25# Open up your eyes

0:12:25 > 0:12:29# You'll discover there's a world outside

0:12:29 > 0:12:31# There's a world outside!

0:12:31 > 0:12:33# To fix a broken heart

0:12:33 > 0:12:34# You have to try

0:12:34 > 0:12:39# Pick it up, pick it up It's a beautiful life

0:12:39 > 0:12:44# Beautiful li-ife

0:12:44 > 0:12:46# Beautiful life

0:12:46 > 0:12:49# Oh-oh-oh

0:12:49 > 0:12:51# Ooh-ooh

0:12:51 > 0:12:55# Beautiful li-i-ife

0:12:57 > 0:12:59# Beautiful life. #

0:12:59 > 0:13:02Thank you!

0:13:02 > 0:13:06CHEERING AND SCREAMING

0:13:09 > 0:13:12Ooh, look. One of them left their scarf.

0:13:12 > 0:13:15SCREAMING

0:13:15 > 0:13:18Union J. Love hearts...

0:13:18 > 0:13:21or sour apples? Let's find out with Mr Burgess.

0:13:21 > 0:13:26Well, I can't see what all the fuss is about, myself,

0:13:26 > 0:13:29- but Union J, any good? - Yeah, they're awesome.

0:13:29 > 0:13:32- Why were they awesome?- Because...

0:13:32 > 0:13:35their singing was so good and they touched our hearts.

0:13:35 > 0:13:38They can't be that good because we've got them banged up in here.

0:13:38 > 0:13:41The girls are screaming for Union J - what about the lads?

0:13:41 > 0:13:45- Er, just as much. - Yeah?- Yep.- You enjoyed them?

0:13:45 > 0:13:49- Yeah, they were amazing.- What about a man's perspective on this?

0:13:49 > 0:13:51Erm, because they...

0:13:51 > 0:13:55so bad that they had to...

0:13:55 > 0:13:56GASPS

0:13:56 > 0:13:58- ..go in here!- A mutiny! A mutiny in the audience!

0:13:58 > 0:14:01- Do you think they're bad, Miss? - No, no, no, no.- Why not?

0:14:01 > 0:14:03Because they're absolutely gorgeous,

0:14:03 > 0:14:05so they would never be bad, would they?

0:14:05 > 0:14:09- You think we should let them go? - Yes, yes, yes.- Really?- Yes!

0:14:09 > 0:14:11- Are you sure? - Please!- Are you sure?- Mmm!

0:14:11 > 0:14:14- You don't want me to keep them in here?- No, no, no.

0:14:14 > 0:14:17- No!- Let them back out into showbiz society, Miss?!

0:14:17 > 0:14:20What do you want me to do with them, Miss, please tell me?!

0:14:20 > 0:14:23- Keep them in here for ever? - No!- No?! No?!

0:14:23 > 0:14:27Oh, I don't know any more! I don't know!

0:14:29 > 0:14:31Right. And for one final word, sum that act up.

0:14:31 > 0:14:34- Fabulous.- Fabulous, sah!

0:14:34 > 0:14:37Right, that's Union J, they could be going free, but right now,

0:14:37 > 0:14:40it's time for the act that we call Solitary Confinement!

0:14:40 > 0:14:43JEERING AND BOOING

0:14:43 > 0:14:46I'm not coming out from under the bed. Solitary Confinement,

0:14:46 > 0:14:48the act that we keep away from all the other prisoners,

0:14:48 > 0:14:51because they're just too bad to be released. If they do well,

0:14:51 > 0:14:53they get a little treat. If they don't do well,

0:14:53 > 0:14:56they get a cruel and unusual punishment.

0:14:56 > 0:14:57Today's treat is,

0:14:57 > 0:15:03they get a signed photograph of 1972 and 1976 Olympic gold medallist

0:15:03 > 0:15:04gymnast, Olga Korbut.

0:15:04 > 0:15:07It's important to remember the past.

0:15:07 > 0:15:10If they don't do well, they get a cruel and unusual punishment.

0:15:10 > 0:15:11- Mr Burgess.- Sah!

0:15:11 > 0:15:15what is today's cruel and unusual punishment?

0:15:15 > 0:15:19They are going to be rammed in a sack, stuffed in a catapult

0:15:19 > 0:15:22and then fired off into outer space, sah!

0:15:22 > 0:15:27First of all, we need a judge. Who do you think? Thank you, sir.

0:15:27 > 0:15:30Give him a round of applause, please.

0:15:30 > 0:15:32APPLAUSE

0:15:32 > 0:15:35Thank you very much indeed. May I ask your first name?

0:15:35 > 0:15:38- Lamar.- Great, have you got a thumb?

0:15:38 > 0:15:41You need that thumb. The thumb of fate.

0:15:41 > 0:15:45And of course, you need the wig of justice. Looks good on you.

0:15:45 > 0:15:47That's pretty good.

0:15:47 > 0:15:51Let's prepare now for the solitary confinement act

0:15:51 > 0:15:53we call Pete's Impressions!

0:15:59 > 0:16:01Hey! Do you like impressions?

0:16:01 > 0:16:03Yeah!

0:16:03 > 0:16:05Here's one for you.

0:16:05 > 0:16:08"You all right there, Pete? You divvy!"

0:16:10 > 0:16:12You know who that is. Come on!

0:16:12 > 0:16:16That's Bob Morgan, Bob the Scouser from number 41.

0:16:16 > 0:16:20Here's another one for you. "There's your change."

0:16:20 > 0:16:22That's Alan from the shop. Next one.

0:16:22 > 0:16:25"Get a proper job, you're pathetic."

0:16:25 > 0:16:27That's my mum, her name's Arthur.

0:16:27 > 0:16:32Next up - "Move out, you're 40!"

0:16:32 > 0:16:35That's my dad, he's interesting to look at.

0:16:35 > 0:16:41Next up - "Oh, Pete, I love you so much!"

0:16:41 > 0:16:44That's my girlfriend, she's imaginary!

0:16:44 > 0:16:46She lives inside my head.

0:16:48 > 0:16:50There we are, Pete's Impressions.

0:16:50 > 0:16:51BOOING

0:16:53 > 0:16:57Yes, that act gives a whole new meaning to the word rubbish.

0:16:57 > 0:17:01It's up to you now to decide, our judge for the day.

0:17:01 > 0:17:03Remember, thumbs up, Olga Korbut.

0:17:03 > 0:17:07Thumbs down, launched into a sub-lunar orbit.

0:17:08 > 0:17:12Five seconds to decide and your time starts now.

0:17:19 > 0:17:24- Yes!- He gets a photo of Olga Korbut, how exciting!

0:17:24 > 0:17:27That was a surprise for everybody.

0:17:27 > 0:17:28- You liked that act, did you?- Yeah.

0:17:28 > 0:17:31Marvellous, there's no accounting for taste.

0:17:31 > 0:17:36Unfortunately, you do not keep the wig of justice but you get something

0:17:36 > 0:17:39any person would be proud to take home.

0:17:39 > 0:17:41It's a picture of your Governor!

0:17:41 > 0:17:44That's for you, thank you very much.

0:17:44 > 0:17:49- Shall we carry on, sir?- Carry on, please.- SAH!- Thank you, Mr Burgess.

0:17:49 > 0:17:52Clears the wax out my ears when he does that.

0:17:52 > 0:17:54Right, that was Solitary Confinement,

0:17:54 > 0:17:56on now with the Freedom Show,

0:17:56 > 0:17:58jailers and jailbirds, who'll be going free?

0:17:58 > 0:18:01Will it be this next act? A very unusual act.

0:18:01 > 0:18:03One is much older than the other.

0:18:03 > 0:18:07One's serving 18 months and the other's serving 25 years.

0:18:07 > 0:18:11See if you can guess which is which as we welcome the unique skills

0:18:11 > 0:18:14of Duplicate!

0:18:14 > 0:18:18APPLAUSE

0:18:23 > 0:18:26MUSIC: "Boyfriend" by Justin Bieber

0:18:44 > 0:18:48MUSIC: "Sexy And I Know It" by LMFAO

0:19:33 > 0:19:36MUSIC: "Wanna Get Hype" by District 78

0:20:14 > 0:20:15GUNSHOTS

0:20:17 > 0:20:19APPLAUSE

0:20:22 > 0:20:24Oh, dear.

0:20:24 > 0:20:26Oh, well, dear, oh, dear.

0:20:26 > 0:20:31Duplicate had a very stretchy face but will he be doing a long stretch?

0:20:31 > 0:20:33Let's find out with Mr Burgess.

0:20:33 > 0:20:36Right. Let's come round here. What did you make of it, sir?

0:20:36 > 0:20:40I thought it was the bzz-ness.

0:20:40 > 0:20:42Don't you mean the business?

0:20:42 > 0:20:43It gave me a...buzz.

0:20:43 > 0:20:47Wait a minute! Grab him. It's the buzz fly.

0:20:47 > 0:20:50Come on. Off you go. Take him to solitary.

0:20:50 > 0:20:52Keep going, well done, chaps.

0:20:52 > 0:20:54Duplicate, good?

0:20:54 > 0:20:58The mask looked really realistic because it was all over his face.

0:20:58 > 0:21:01We couldn't see anything else.

0:21:01 > 0:21:03One final word. Sum that act up for me, sir.

0:21:03 > 0:21:06- Weirdtastic! - Weirdtastic, sir.

0:21:06 > 0:21:10Jailers and jailbirds, to celebrate the capture of Buzzkill,

0:21:10 > 0:21:12a final performing prisoner act.

0:21:12 > 0:21:17The Wonderful, amazing illusions of Jarrett and Raja!

0:21:17 > 0:21:20APPLAUSE

0:21:26 > 0:21:28Are you ready?

0:21:28 > 0:21:30ALL: Yes!

0:21:31 > 0:21:33Music!

0:21:33 > 0:21:36MUSIC: "Hall Of The Mountain King"

0:21:49 > 0:21:51Yeah!

0:21:52 > 0:21:54You are perfect. Come with me.

0:21:54 > 0:21:57- Where are we going? - Right over here.

0:21:57 > 0:21:59No, no! I don't do magic!

0:22:03 > 0:22:05We need you, trust me.

0:22:05 > 0:22:07I don't want to do this!

0:22:14 > 0:22:16You'll be fine. Trust me.

0:22:33 > 0:22:35CHAINSAW REVS

0:22:35 > 0:22:37SHE SCREAMS

0:22:50 > 0:22:51Here we go!

0:23:08 > 0:23:10APPLAUSE

0:23:11 > 0:23:15- What am I supposed to do now? - What you always do. Play the piano.

0:23:15 > 0:23:18- Like this?- Why not?

0:23:18 > 0:23:21I'm cut in half, that's why not!

0:23:21 > 0:23:23You'll be fine. Trust me.

0:23:23 > 0:23:25You're absolutely insane!

0:23:30 > 0:23:34MUSIC: "Hall Of The Mountain King"

0:23:38 > 0:23:40APPLAUSE

0:23:41 > 0:23:44- I did it!- I told you, mister!

0:23:46 > 0:23:48Whoa!

0:23:56 > 0:23:58See, I told you you'd be all right.

0:24:00 > 0:24:01Your jacket.

0:24:08 > 0:24:10APPLAUSE

0:24:14 > 0:24:18Give a big round of applause! Jarrett and Raja!

0:24:18 > 0:24:20What an act! Wow.

0:24:20 > 0:24:24I tell you what, when the clap-o-meter comes,

0:24:24 > 0:24:27they're hoping they don't get a split decision.

0:24:27 > 0:24:30What did you think of them? Winners? Mr Burgess?

0:24:30 > 0:24:32How did they do that, sir?

0:24:32 > 0:24:35I liked the bit where he was cut in half

0:24:35 > 0:24:38and started to play piano on his back which was impressive.

0:24:38 > 0:24:41- An amazing magic act? - It was really funny.

0:24:41 > 0:24:44I don't think anyone could have pulled that off.

0:24:44 > 0:24:46I was really blown away.

0:24:46 > 0:24:48One final word. Sum that act up for me, sir.

0:24:48 > 0:24:50Immaculate.

0:24:50 > 0:24:53- Immaculate, sir. - What a fabulous show.

0:24:53 > 0:24:56Let's welcome them all back onto the stage.

0:24:56 > 0:24:59The cast of Peter Pan and the Never Ending Story,

0:24:59 > 0:25:03Union J, Duplicate and Jarrett and Raja!

0:25:09 > 0:25:12I don't think we've ever had so many people on the Freedom Show stage.

0:25:12 > 0:25:16Jailers and jailbirds, will you show your appreciation for the fabulous

0:25:16 > 0:25:20Never Ending Story of Peter Pan?

0:25:20 > 0:25:23CHEERING

0:25:26 > 0:25:3184.6. Very good. Wonderful.

0:25:31 > 0:25:34The next act you saw, there was a bit of screaming,

0:25:34 > 0:25:35will they be screaming on the way out?

0:25:35 > 0:25:37It's Union J.

0:25:37 > 0:25:40CHEERING

0:25:45 > 0:25:47Almost broke the clap-o-meter there.

0:25:47 > 0:25:5193.3, a great score. Only one act can go free.

0:25:51 > 0:25:54This next act were very unusual. They were Duplicate.

0:25:54 > 0:25:56What did you think of them?

0:25:56 > 0:25:58CHEERING

0:26:03 > 0:26:07Great score for them, 86.4. But still in the lead, Union J.

0:26:07 > 0:26:09One act to go.

0:26:09 > 0:26:12They were mystical, they were marvellous, they were unique,

0:26:12 > 0:26:14Jarrett and Raja!

0:26:14 > 0:26:17CHEERING

0:26:20 > 0:26:23A brilliant act but you're going to be joining us for supper, folks,

0:26:23 > 0:26:26because you can see on the clap-o-meter

0:26:26 > 0:26:30with an all-time high score, 93.3,

0:26:30 > 0:26:35and going free, Union J. You're free to go, lads. That way.

0:26:38 > 0:26:40Give them a big cheer, jailers and jailbirds!

0:26:40 > 0:26:42APPLAUSE

0:26:42 > 0:26:44It's mania, the usual, isn't it, Mr Burgess?

0:26:44 > 0:26:48We've had a bit of a disaster in the kitchen, sir.

0:26:48 > 0:26:52What with Buzzkill being around, he's vomited in the sloppy porridge.

0:26:52 > 0:26:56He's done his business in it, squirmed and writhed in it. Filth.

0:26:56 > 0:27:00The only good thing is, we've thrown all the sloppy porridge away!

0:27:00 > 0:27:03No, sir. Only half of it. Waste not, want not.

0:27:03 > 0:27:06Take them away. Give them a big cheer!

0:27:06 > 0:27:08CHEERING

0:27:08 > 0:27:11They were brilliant.

0:27:11 > 0:27:13Captain Hook, take him as well.

0:27:13 > 0:27:16I think you'll agree, four sensational acts.

0:27:16 > 0:27:21Bye, everybody, and remember if you can't sing, dance or rhyme...

0:27:21 > 0:27:24ALL: Don't do the crime!

0:27:24 > 0:27:28See you soon, jailers and jailbirds! Bye!

0:27:42 > 0:27:45Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd

0:27:51 > 0:27:56Mr Buzzkill, I'd like to introduce you to your new cellmate.

0:27:56 > 0:27:57- Bring him in, Frank.- Certainly, sir.

0:27:57 > 0:28:03Buzzkill, the human fly, meet Sir Legsalot, the human spider.

0:28:03 > 0:28:06Don't worry, he's a vegetarian.

0:28:07 > 0:28:09Uh-uh...