0:00:01 > 0:00:04Dear Mum, today The Slammer has been full of surprises!
0:00:04 > 0:00:05Surprising treats...
0:00:06 > 0:00:08Surprising beats...
0:00:08 > 0:00:09# Hey, hey! #
0:00:09 > 0:00:10And surprising feats!
0:00:13 > 0:00:14It all started like this...
0:00:19 > 0:00:24# You've been found guilty of a howling showbiz crime
0:00:24 > 0:00:28# So welcome to The Slammer where you're gonna serve your time
0:00:28 > 0:00:32# With every type of minstrel, entertainer and artiste
0:00:32 > 0:00:36# Performing to the limit to try and get released
0:00:36 > 0:00:41# So go and fetch the audience, bring them to The Slammer
0:00:41 > 0:00:45# And polish up your act, with a bit of glitz and glamour
0:00:45 > 0:00:50# Your fate is in their hands, so make them cheer and clamour
0:00:50 > 0:00:54# It's the only way you'll ever leave The Slammer
0:00:54 > 0:00:58# It's the only way you'll ever leave The Slammer! #
0:01:01 > 0:01:04So may I ask everyone to raise a glass,
0:01:04 > 0:01:07in memory of The Slammer's greatest ever practical joker...
0:01:07 > 0:01:09Rodney "Oh, What A Surprise" Flimflam.
0:01:09 > 0:01:11- ALL:- Rest in peace!
0:01:12 > 0:01:14Bleh!
0:01:16 > 0:01:18Somebody's put washing up liquid in this!
0:01:18 > 0:01:20Oh, yes... A joker to the end.
0:01:20 > 0:01:22He could never catch me out that easily.
0:01:22 > 0:01:25WHOOPEE CUSHION BLOWS
0:01:25 > 0:01:27Who did that? Was it you?
0:01:27 > 0:01:28Rodney strikes again!
0:01:28 > 0:01:30Ha! Sweetie...
0:01:32 > 0:01:34Oh! Hot! Hot!
0:01:36 > 0:01:38I'll have that...
0:01:40 > 0:01:43Flimflam was the greatest practical joker this place has ever seen.
0:01:43 > 0:01:45Rumour has it he's hidden a priceless treasure
0:01:45 > 0:01:46somewhere in The Slammer.
0:01:48 > 0:01:50What's the matter? Am I dribbling limeade again?
0:01:50 > 0:01:52You've got writing on your face, sir!
0:01:52 > 0:01:55Well, there's certainly lines on it.
0:01:55 > 0:01:56There's writing here, too.
0:01:56 > 0:01:59It must have rubbed off when you were wiping your sweaty head.
0:01:59 > 0:02:03- Well, what does it say? - Um, splagurge the, the...
0:02:03 > 0:02:04Not my head, the note!
0:02:04 > 0:02:06Oh, I see, sir!
0:02:06 > 0:02:09"Whilst I was at Her Majesty's pleasure
0:02:09 > 0:02:11"I managed to hide my priceless treasure
0:02:11 > 0:02:12"Solve these clues to find the place
0:02:12 > 0:02:15"Where I hid something to put a smile on your face!"
0:02:15 > 0:02:18It's a clue from Rodney where he hid the treasure.
0:02:18 > 0:02:19Well deduced, Sherlock.
0:02:21 > 0:02:25Hey, back off. What's the first clue?
0:02:25 > 0:02:27"Food in the canteen was never ever good
0:02:27 > 0:02:30"But the good stuff hides in a place made of wood!"
0:02:30 > 0:02:31The canteen!
0:02:40 > 0:02:42"Good stuff hides in a place made of wood..."
0:02:42 > 0:02:44Look for something wooden.
0:02:44 > 0:02:47- No, not me! - Well, what about that, sir?
0:02:47 > 0:02:50Don't be ridiculous, Frank. Who ever heard of a wooden banana?
0:02:50 > 0:02:52Not the bananas, sir, the crate!
0:02:52 > 0:02:53Oh...
0:02:53 > 0:02:56Oh, she's right. There's something hidden on the back side!
0:02:56 > 0:02:58- Oh, I'll get it off. - Not my backside!
0:02:58 > 0:03:01- The crate.- Another note. - A note, a note.
0:03:01 > 0:03:02Clue number two...
0:03:02 > 0:03:04"My window was covered in old iron bars
0:03:04 > 0:03:07"But my treasure is hidden close to the stars."
0:03:07 > 0:03:09He's hidden his treasure on the moon.
0:03:09 > 0:03:11How crafty!
0:03:11 > 0:03:14Yes, either that, sir, or it's in his cell.
0:03:29 > 0:03:31No treasure here, either.
0:03:31 > 0:03:33And you're not exactly helping, sir, are you?
0:03:33 > 0:03:35- Yes, I am, Frank.- How?
0:03:35 > 0:03:36By not getting in the way.
0:03:36 > 0:03:37Fair point.
0:03:37 > 0:03:41Although, I must say, Rodney's bunk isn't very comfy.
0:03:43 > 0:03:45- Another note!- Oh, a note?
0:03:48 > 0:03:50"I always had such a hoot
0:03:50 > 0:03:52"When the Governor wore his showtime suit."
0:03:52 > 0:03:53But my suit's in my office.
0:03:53 > 0:03:56Well, that's where the loot is, then.
0:04:05 > 0:04:06We must stop meeting like this.
0:04:11 > 0:04:15Catapult, antacid chew, lucky jelly bean...
0:04:15 > 0:04:17I mean, all treasures of a sort, Frank,
0:04:17 > 0:04:19but nothing left there by Rodney.
0:04:19 > 0:04:22I wouldn't say that, sir.
0:04:22 > 0:04:25Allow me, Shirley. Or should I say "sir".
0:04:25 > 0:04:27- Another note!- A note!
0:04:27 > 0:04:30"If you're really very clever and put my clues together
0:04:30 > 0:04:33"You'll finally find my special treasure!"
0:04:33 > 0:04:35We're obviously not clever enough...
0:04:35 > 0:04:36Speak for yourself, sir!
0:04:36 > 0:04:37We've no time to find the treasure now,
0:04:37 > 0:04:39the Freedom Show's about to start.
0:04:39 > 0:04:41- We'll keep looking as soon as it's over. Deal?- Deal.
0:04:41 > 0:04:44And no sneaking off trying to find the treasure for yourselves.
0:04:44 > 0:04:47No, no, no...
0:04:47 > 0:04:49- Eh, eh, eh. - I was just doing the...
0:04:49 > 0:04:51- Right.- How do I look?
0:04:51 > 0:04:53- BOTH:- Shifty. - Thank you very much.
0:04:53 > 0:04:54It's showtime!
0:04:58 > 0:04:59- ANNOUNCER:- Ladies and gentlemen.
0:04:59 > 0:05:01Welcome to HMP Slammer,
0:05:01 > 0:05:04where you decide which prisoner is to be released.
0:05:04 > 0:05:06Now, please welcome your host...
0:05:06 > 0:05:09he's spent all morning looking for treasure,
0:05:09 > 0:05:11on his day off, he tickles chickens for pleasure.
0:05:11 > 0:05:14Please welcome the Governor!
0:05:14 > 0:05:16APPLAUSE
0:05:29 > 0:05:30Who's the Governor?
0:05:30 > 0:05:33- AUDIENCE:- You're the Governor!
0:05:33 > 0:05:36Welcome jailers and jailbirds to another fantastic Freedom Show.
0:05:36 > 0:05:40And I've heard that there's treasure hidden somewhere in The Slammer.
0:05:40 > 0:05:43Oh, hey! No, hang on a minute!
0:05:43 > 0:05:46Where are you lot going? No, no, no. I don't mean there.
0:05:46 > 0:05:47Come on, sit down, everybody.
0:05:47 > 0:05:50We've got real treasure to unearth in the Freedom Show, first of all.
0:05:50 > 0:05:52We've got some marvellous acts,
0:05:52 > 0:05:55and nobody's going looking for treasure until after the show...
0:05:55 > 0:05:59Ain't that right, Mr Burgess? Miss Meadows?
0:05:59 > 0:06:01Let's get off with a real wonderful act,
0:06:01 > 0:06:03and they're doing three years here in The Slammer
0:06:03 > 0:06:05for giving the judge a tap on the head
0:06:05 > 0:06:07and making water come out of his ears.
0:06:07 > 0:06:09Because they are called Tap Factory!
0:06:09 > 0:06:11APPLAUSE
0:06:55 > 0:06:56Hey, come on!
0:08:17 > 0:08:19Oh, boy!
0:08:19 > 0:08:22The Tap Factory, yeah. I wouldn't mind,
0:08:22 > 0:08:24but we only booked them to paint the corridor. Takes for ever!
0:08:24 > 0:08:27Wonderful tapping there. What did you think of that?
0:08:27 > 0:08:31Let's find out with Mr Burgess - no mean tapper himself.
0:08:31 > 0:08:32Well, the Tap Factory, there.
0:08:32 > 0:08:36Was it a production line or was it a chorus line, miss?
0:08:36 > 0:08:39It was good, awesome and beautiful
0:08:39 > 0:08:44because they were doing it really quickly and really fast.
0:08:44 > 0:08:46Tell me what you thought of Tap Factory, sir.
0:08:46 > 0:08:49It was amazingly hilarious with a topping of cool.
0:08:49 > 0:08:52A topping of cool? I like that.
0:08:52 > 0:08:55- Right, for one final word, sum that act up for me, sir.- Moves.
0:08:55 > 0:08:57Moves, sir, moves! Very good.
0:08:57 > 0:09:01Well, a very exciting act, weren't they, the Tap Factory?
0:09:01 > 0:09:04'I'm sure that treasure's in the canteen somewhere.'
0:09:07 > 0:09:10This is another little piece of buried treasure.
0:09:10 > 0:09:13Absolutely golden this act is and he's serving five years
0:09:13 > 0:09:16in The Slammer for giving the judge a lot of hot air
0:09:16 > 0:09:17which he blew into balloons.
0:09:17 > 0:09:20Which is just as well because he is Bob Wooding.
0:09:20 > 0:09:24CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:09:30 > 0:09:34PINK PANTHER MUSIC PLAYS
0:10:00 > 0:10:02007 THEME PLAYS
0:10:26 > 0:10:30DR WHO MUSIC PLAYS
0:10:48 > 0:10:52GHOSTBUSTERS THEME PLAYS
0:11:00 > 0:11:02# Ghostbusters!
0:11:02 > 0:11:06# If there's something strange in the neighbourhood
0:11:06 > 0:11:08# Who you gonna call? #
0:11:08 > 0:11:10- ALL:- Ghostbusters!
0:11:17 > 0:11:18# I ain't afraid of no ghost. #
0:11:18 > 0:11:21ET SONG PLAYS
0:11:30 > 0:11:33ET, phone home.
0:11:38 > 0:11:40# Five
0:11:40 > 0:11:42# Four
0:11:42 > 0:11:45# Three
0:11:45 > 0:11:46# Two
0:11:46 > 0:11:48# One
0:11:48 > 0:11:50# Thunderbirds are go! #
0:11:52 > 0:11:55THUNDERBIRDS MUSIC PLAYS
0:12:26 > 0:12:29Bob Wooding, what a fantastic act, ladies and gentlemen!
0:12:29 > 0:12:30Did you enjoy that, yeah?
0:12:30 > 0:12:32- ALL:- Yeah!
0:12:32 > 0:12:33Real treasure.
0:12:33 > 0:12:36Yes, and all those aliens and scary monsters...
0:12:36 > 0:12:38almost as scary as Mr Burgess.
0:12:38 > 0:12:41Bob Wooding, balloon bending or mind-boggling?
0:12:41 > 0:12:43I think he was really creative
0:12:43 > 0:12:46and I think he really kept us entertained instead of boring us.
0:12:49 > 0:12:50That's it.
0:12:50 > 0:12:52Bob Wooding, was he "gooding"?
0:12:52 > 0:12:56He was very extraordinary and because it was different
0:12:56 > 0:12:59and nobody has done anything amazing like that.
0:12:59 > 0:13:02And for one final word, some that act up for me, sir.
0:13:02 > 0:13:04- Funny.- Funny.
0:13:05 > 0:13:09Will they be going free? You'll be deciding later with the Clapometer.
0:13:14 > 0:13:15Fruitless!
0:13:16 > 0:13:21Right now, it's time for the act that we call Solitary Confinement.
0:13:21 > 0:13:24- AUDIENCE:- Boo!
0:13:25 > 0:13:29The part of the Freedom Show where we give an act a chance to perform.
0:13:29 > 0:13:30They're too naughty to let them free,
0:13:30 > 0:13:33but if they do well, they get a little treat.
0:13:33 > 0:13:36And today's treat is, they can have a day in The Slammer's spa...
0:13:36 > 0:13:37We've got a spa!
0:13:37 > 0:13:39They can have a sunbed, they can lie on the sun lounger
0:13:39 > 0:13:42and get a lovely, honey-toasted suntan. They look gorgeous.
0:13:42 > 0:13:43Nice, isn't it?
0:13:43 > 0:13:46If they don't do well, they get a cruel and unusual punishment.
0:13:46 > 0:13:47- Mr Burgess!- Yeah?
0:13:47 > 0:13:49What is today's cruel and unusual punishment?
0:13:49 > 0:13:53Today, sir, it's the old sack and porridge routine, sir!
0:13:53 > 0:13:56Ah, ye olde sack and porridge. First of all, we need a judge, Mr Burgess.
0:13:56 > 0:13:58- We do, indeed. - Somebody looking wise?
0:13:58 > 0:14:01- Fine, I'm going to this lady right here.- She looks very wise.
0:14:01 > 0:14:04Yes, bring her up. Give her a round of applause, please. Thank you.
0:14:04 > 0:14:07- Here you go.- Thank you, young lady.
0:14:07 > 0:14:10- Your name, please?- Savanna.
0:14:10 > 0:14:12- Savanna, apply the... - The wig of justice, sir.
0:14:12 > 0:14:16Savanna, you are our judge as we go onto the Solitary Confinement act
0:14:16 > 0:14:19that we call Nutty Noah!
0:14:21 > 0:14:24- AUDIENCE:- Boo!
0:14:30 > 0:14:32MUSIC PLAYS
0:15:04 > 0:15:06CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:15:09 > 0:15:13Well, Savanna, it's up to you now to decide the fate of Nutty Noah.
0:15:13 > 0:15:17Remember, thumbs up, you're sunny like honey and flat on your back.
0:15:17 > 0:15:21Thumbs down, you're ploppy and sloppy in a sweaty old sack.
0:15:21 > 0:15:24Get that thumb up there. Your five seconds start now.
0:15:24 > 0:15:27Oh, straight down! Oh, straightaway!
0:15:27 > 0:15:30Your act was weak and sloppy, so for your it's...
0:15:30 > 0:15:33- ALL:- It's plop, plop, sloppy!
0:15:33 > 0:15:36Let him have it, both buckets! Go on!
0:15:36 > 0:15:38Sloppy! Ploppy!
0:15:38 > 0:15:45- CROWD CHANTS:- Sloppy! Ploppy!
0:15:50 > 0:15:52Sloppy! Ploppy!
0:15:52 > 0:15:54Sir! Come on, sir!
0:15:54 > 0:15:57Take him back to the cells!
0:15:57 > 0:16:00Yeah, give him a cheer, and Justice Savanna, as well!
0:16:00 > 0:16:02CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:16:04 > 0:16:07Sloppy, ploppy part... I love it!
0:16:07 > 0:16:11- Mr Burgess.- Ah!- Continue, please, with the Freedom Show.- Daaargh!
0:16:11 > 0:16:15Right, jailers and jailbirds, our next Freedom Show act is marvellous.
0:16:15 > 0:16:19Been in The Slammer for seven years, he's the man of a thousand voices,
0:16:19 > 0:16:22it's cost us a fortune, we have to feed every one of those voices.
0:16:22 > 0:16:25It's Anil Desai!
0:16:25 > 0:16:30APPLAUSE AND CHEERING
0:16:35 > 0:16:36Hello, boys and girls.
0:16:36 > 0:16:39I'm going to do as many impressions as I can
0:16:39 > 0:16:41in as much time as I have,
0:16:41 > 0:16:43so I need a volunteer.
0:16:43 > 0:16:47Officer Meadows, would you help me with my act, please?
0:16:47 > 0:16:51Please, it's the only chance I have to get out of here!
0:16:51 > 0:16:53CHEERING
0:16:53 > 0:16:56Now, I have a deck of cards.
0:16:56 > 0:16:59On each card is a famous name that I'm going to impersonate.
0:16:59 > 0:17:00What I would like you to do, please,
0:17:00 > 0:17:03is you say the name on the card, I'll do the impression,
0:17:03 > 0:17:05you guys enjoy it, I'll move on to the next one.
0:17:05 > 0:17:10- Are you ready for this? KIDS:- YEAH!- Me too! Take it away!
0:17:10 > 0:17:13The movie trailer voice man.
0:17:13 > 0:17:15Get ready for the time of your life.
0:17:15 > 0:17:17APPLAUSE
0:17:17 > 0:17:21- Just warming up. - Shaggy and Scooby-Doo.
0:17:21 > 0:17:25Come on, Scoob, let's get out of here. Zoiks!
0:17:25 > 0:17:26LAUGHS AS SCOOBY-DOO
0:17:26 > 0:17:31- Homer Simpson.- Homer Simpson. Yay, I like burgers and pizza and chicken.
0:17:31 > 0:17:33Has anyone seen Lisa or Bart?
0:17:33 > 0:17:37Anywhere? I don't know where those kids are.
0:17:37 > 0:17:39AS MARGE: Homer, they're at home watching the show on TV.
0:17:39 > 0:17:43AS HOMER: Thanks, Marge. Heh-heh-heh, Marge.
0:17:43 > 0:17:46APPLAUSE
0:17:46 > 0:17:49- Captain Jack Sparrow.- Listen, mate, here's the thing. Whoa.
0:17:49 > 0:17:52Whoa, this isn't the Black Pearl. Where am I?
0:17:52 > 0:17:55Hit the deck and man the sails, here comes a big wave.
0:17:55 > 0:17:56Batman.
0:17:56 > 0:17:59AS CHRISTIAN BALE'S BATMAN: I'm Batman, where are they?
0:17:59 > 0:18:02Where are they? Oh, there they are.
0:18:02 > 0:18:06LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE
0:18:06 > 0:18:07Mr T.
0:18:07 > 0:18:09I pity the fool that impersonates me.
0:18:09 > 0:18:13Huh! Eat your greens, kids. Don't make me mad. Huh!
0:18:13 > 0:18:16APPLAUSE
0:18:16 > 0:18:19Gandalf from Lord Of The Rings.
0:18:19 > 0:18:23Oh, Frodo, all we can do now is to decide what to do with the time
0:18:23 > 0:18:25we have left.
0:18:25 > 0:18:27Oh, it's tea-time. Bye.
0:18:27 > 0:18:29APPLAUSE
0:18:29 > 0:18:32Kermit the Frog.
0:18:32 > 0:18:34I'm Kermit the Frog. I'm here at The Slammer, reporting.
0:18:34 > 0:18:39Someone is going to get released today. Who's it going to be? Let's find out in a few minutes.
0:18:39 > 0:18:41- Angelina Jolie.- Ooh.
0:18:43 > 0:18:47LAUGHTER
0:18:47 > 0:18:50- Austin Powers. - Austin Powers. Very groovy.
0:18:50 > 0:18:53You know, you are heading for a smacked bottom, yeah.
0:18:53 > 0:18:55LAUGHTER Oh, behave.
0:18:55 > 0:18:58I've been Anil Desai and many other people.
0:18:58 > 0:19:00Folks, you've been great. Thank you very much.
0:19:00 > 0:19:02APPLAUSE AND CHEERING
0:19:07 > 0:19:10Anil Desai, the man of a thousand voices.
0:19:10 > 0:19:13Let's hear from another voice, Mr Burgess.
0:19:13 > 0:19:15Mr Burgess? Frank?
0:19:17 > 0:19:19It's all feathers and no treasures!
0:19:19 > 0:19:21Atchoo!
0:19:22 > 0:19:25I bet he's gone treasure hunting again.
0:19:25 > 0:19:30Miss Meadows, I know you've been very busy, but would you mind helping out?
0:19:30 > 0:19:32So, tell me about that act.
0:19:32 > 0:19:36I think he was amazing, I especially liked the Simpsons one.
0:19:36 > 0:19:41- I think he was the best act yet. - Do you like impressions, sir?
0:19:41 > 0:19:47- Yeah, I love impressions.- Do you do any?- Yeah.- Who do you do?- You.
0:19:47 > 0:19:50- No.- Yeah.- Go on, then, here's the microphone, do me.
0:19:50 > 0:19:53Ladies and gentlemen,
0:19:53 > 0:19:58welcome to-o-o-o-o The Slammer!
0:19:58 > 0:19:59LAUGHTER
0:19:59 > 0:20:04- Very good. Very good. What's your name?- Jake.
0:20:04 > 0:20:08- Jake, did you like the impressions? - Yeah.- What was the best impression?
0:20:08 > 0:20:12- Batman.- Batman?- Yeah.- And for one final word, please sum that act up.
0:20:12 > 0:20:16- Marvellodrome.- Marvellodrome, sir.
0:20:16 > 0:20:20Well, that's what you thought of Anil Desai. Marvellous.
0:20:20 > 0:20:23Mm. Mm.
0:20:23 > 0:20:26It's on to our final performing prisoner act.
0:20:26 > 0:20:29From the young offenders section here at The Slammer, they're young,
0:20:29 > 0:20:32just like yourselves. What will you think of them?
0:20:32 > 0:20:34They're a mini band and they've been banned from outside society
0:20:34 > 0:20:37but they might get back in if they win tonight.
0:20:37 > 0:20:39Let's hear it for the Mini Band!
0:20:39 > 0:20:45APPLAUSE AND CHEERING
0:20:48 > 0:20:50MUSIC STARTS
0:21:06 > 0:21:09# They're coming for you, so you better watch
0:21:11 > 0:21:13# See your every movement
0:21:13 > 0:21:17# Still, you'll think you've won
0:21:17 > 0:21:20# And now I know what's on your mind
0:21:22 > 0:21:28# Cos you're so hard, so hard to find
0:21:28 > 0:21:33# I'm seeing through the lying
0:21:33 > 0:21:39# Hey, hey, I saw the picture now that you are not a fake
0:21:39 > 0:21:44# Hey, hey, step into the light and you will never hurt again
0:21:44 > 0:21:49# Hey, hey, you'll find your way that you can win your special place
0:21:49 > 0:21:51# Hey, hey
0:21:51 > 0:21:55# Never, never, ever feel the pain
0:22:05 > 0:22:11# I'm seeing through your lying eyes
0:22:11 > 0:22:17# And I know what's on your mind
0:22:37 > 0:22:42# Hey, hey, I'm sure the people know that you are not a fake
0:22:42 > 0:22:48# Hey, hey, step into the light and you will never feel the pain
0:22:48 > 0:22:49# Hey, hey
0:22:49 > 0:22:53# Never, never, ever feel the pain
0:22:53 > 0:22:55# Hey, hey
0:22:55 > 0:23:00# Never, never, ever feel the pain. #
0:23:10 > 0:23:14Whoa! Come on, let's hear it again for the Mini Band. Yeah.
0:23:14 > 0:23:16APPLAUSE
0:23:16 > 0:23:19Oh! Well, what did you think of the Mini Band?
0:23:19 > 0:23:23I was going to leap out into the mosh pit. Would you have caught me?
0:23:23 > 0:23:25No, you wouldn't, would you?
0:23:25 > 0:23:29Let's find out what you thought with that old mosher, Mr Burgess.
0:23:29 > 0:23:30Rock 'n' roll!
0:23:30 > 0:23:33Mini plus band equals noise.
0:23:33 > 0:23:35I've been to lots of music festivals
0:23:35 > 0:23:39and I think these have been the best ones ever.
0:23:39 > 0:23:44- And I think they're as hot as lava. - They're as hot as lava?- Yep!
0:23:44 > 0:23:48- And what about a man's perspective on that?- I didn't like it at all.
0:23:48 > 0:23:51I didn't think they could sing or play music, to be honest.
0:23:51 > 0:23:53- Oh, so, you're in my camp, sir. - Yeah.
0:23:53 > 0:23:55- KIDS BOO - Oi, oi, oi!
0:23:55 > 0:23:57Right. Shut up. Shut up.
0:23:57 > 0:23:59The man is entitled to his opinion
0:23:59 > 0:24:01and it happens to be the same opinion as mine.
0:24:01 > 0:24:03Have you thought about joining the prison service, sir?
0:24:03 > 0:24:06- No.- I'll give you an application form afterwards.
0:24:06 > 0:24:07What did you think of the Mini Band?
0:24:07 > 0:24:12So absolutely amazing that I have nothing to say.
0:24:12 > 0:24:14Thank you very much and goodbye.
0:24:14 > 0:24:18One final word. Sum up that noise, sir.
0:24:18 > 0:24:19Rocktastic!
0:24:19 > 0:24:21Rocktastic, sir!
0:24:21 > 0:24:24Well, it's that time when we decide who goes free.
0:24:24 > 0:24:27Let's invite everybody back on the stage.
0:24:27 > 0:24:29Tap Factory, Bob Wooding...
0:24:29 > 0:24:30APPLAUSE AND CHEERING
0:24:30 > 0:24:33..Anil Desai,
0:24:33 > 0:24:36and, of course, the Mini Band.
0:24:37 > 0:24:40Well, four very different acts indeed,
0:24:40 > 0:24:44you decide who goes free with this, Officer Meadows' Clapometer.
0:24:44 > 0:24:48The more noise you make, the higher they score. It's as simple as that.
0:24:48 > 0:24:49What did you make of them?
0:24:49 > 0:24:54All the way from France, let's hear it for Tap Factory.
0:24:54 > 0:24:57APPLAUSE AND CHEERING
0:25:01 > 0:25:0678.3. Great score. Well done, lads. Tres bon, tres bon.
0:25:06 > 0:25:07Next, jailers and jailbirds,
0:25:07 > 0:25:11what did you think of the fabulous balloon antics of Bob Wooding?
0:25:11 > 0:25:16APPLAUSE AND CHEERING
0:25:19 > 0:25:22Brilliant, Bob, but, oh, you're in second place, Bob.
0:25:22 > 0:25:24In the lead, it's Tap Factory at the moment.
0:25:24 > 0:25:28Now, a very clever gentleman, lots of different voices,
0:25:28 > 0:25:30which one did you like the best?
0:25:30 > 0:25:33Will he be going out? It's Anil Desai!
0:25:33 > 0:25:36APPLAUSE AND SCREAMING
0:25:40 > 0:25:44He's working the crowd. 84.7, he's in the lead, ladies and gentlemen.
0:25:44 > 0:25:49Only one act now can pip Anil.
0:25:49 > 0:25:51Jailers and jailbirds, felon fans,
0:25:51 > 0:25:55what did you think of the rocking sounds of the Mini Band?
0:25:55 > 0:25:59APPLAUSE AND SCREAMING
0:26:02 > 0:26:05Well, guess what, they're the winners.
0:26:05 > 0:26:08Look at that, with a great score right at the end of 90.6
0:26:08 > 0:26:11and going free, it's the Mini Band.
0:26:11 > 0:26:14APPLAUSE AND CHEERING
0:26:15 > 0:26:19Off you go, take them away there. That's great news for them.
0:26:19 > 0:26:22The not so great news for everybody else is you've got to stay for tea.
0:26:22 > 0:26:24What do we have for tea in The Slammer?
0:26:24 > 0:26:27- KIDS:- Sloppy, ploppy porridge!
0:26:27 > 0:26:30And there's no point asking you, Mr Burgess, cos you'll just make out
0:26:30 > 0:26:33it's some fancy French a la mode
0:26:33 > 0:26:36and it'll just turn out to be sloppy, ploppy porridge.
0:26:36 > 0:26:40- It might not be, sir. - It might not be? Oh! What is for tea?
0:26:40 > 0:26:42Sloppy, ploppy porridge, sir.
0:26:42 > 0:26:44Oh! Away you go. Go and enjoy the porridge.
0:26:44 > 0:26:46Give them a big hand, ladies and gentlemen.
0:26:46 > 0:26:50Tap Factory, Bob Wooding and Anil Desai.
0:26:50 > 0:26:52Well, there is only one winner
0:26:52 > 0:26:54but they're all winners here on the Freedom Show.
0:26:54 > 0:26:56Brilliant acts and a brilliant audience.
0:26:56 > 0:26:59I hope you come and join Officer Meadows and me and Mr Burgess
0:26:59 > 0:27:01for more fun soon on The Slammer.
0:27:01 > 0:27:05And remember, if you can't sing, dance or rhyme...
0:27:05 > 0:27:08- KIDS:- Don't do the time!
0:27:08 > 0:27:12And I will see you soon on the Freedom Show in The Slammer. Bye-bye.
0:27:35 > 0:27:40# It's the only way you'll ever leave the Slammer! #
0:27:40 > 0:27:42So, that's it, then, no treasure?
0:27:42 > 0:27:44We just couldn't put the clues together.
0:27:44 > 0:27:47But that's just what I did, put the clues together.
0:27:47 > 0:27:50Somewhere made of wood, somewhere close to the stars
0:27:50 > 0:27:53and somewhere where I wear my showtime suit.
0:27:53 > 0:27:54BOTH: The Freedom Show stage.
0:27:54 > 0:27:56Yes! Ha-ha-ha!
0:27:56 > 0:27:58Ohhhh!
0:27:58 > 0:28:00ALL: The treasure!
0:28:09 > 0:28:10Is that it?
0:28:10 > 0:28:12Yep.