0:00:05 > 0:00:11# I can make my world come true All my dreams will see me through
0:00:11 > 0:00:15- # It doesn't matter what may come my way...- No! No!
0:00:15 > 0:00:19# Believe me now I will win some day. #
0:00:19 > 0:00:23- Give me that!- You had it yesterday! Here we go again!
0:00:23 > 0:00:28Great, all the same channels at the same time(!)
0:00:29 > 0:00:32Now, what are you gonna do?
0:00:47 > 0:00:50BONES CRACK
0:00:54 > 0:00:58BOTH: Aaaagh!
0:00:58 > 0:01:02- Are they fighting? - Hmm. Must be TV time.
0:01:02 > 0:01:06So when are you going to do something about it?
0:01:06 > 0:01:09About... < SCREAMS Now!
0:01:09 > 0:01:12SHOUTING
0:01:14 > 0:01:20- Do you promise not to attack each other again?- What are we? Animals?
0:01:22 > 0:01:25SHOUTING
0:01:27 > 0:01:33Surely it's time to try a modern, caring approach to discipline.
0:01:33 > 0:01:36These ideas are really...
0:01:36 > 0:01:38interesting.
0:01:39 > 0:01:43Can we just forget about this silly argument?
0:01:43 > 0:01:48- It isn't silly! Every TV time you always...- You ruin everything!
0:01:49 > 0:01:53All this fighting over a silly old channel changer.
0:01:53 > 0:01:57I'd never get into a fight over something so trivial.
0:01:57 > 0:02:02You're a sad, lonely old loser who has no-one to fight with!
0:02:02 > 0:02:05Yes, well...
0:02:05 > 0:02:09Here, can we just write some facts about each other?
0:02:09 > 0:02:12- Easy.- No sweat.
0:02:12 > 0:02:15Nice things.
0:02:15 > 0:02:18You know, positive things.
0:02:19 > 0:02:22How many positive things?
0:02:22 > 0:02:24- Ten.- Ten?
0:02:24 > 0:02:28- We'll be here for days.- Weeks even.
0:02:38 > 0:02:42Five things, then. Surely you can manage that.
0:02:42 > 0:02:47- THEY WHIMPER - One thing. One small thing?
0:02:47 > 0:02:50Then can we go...?
0:02:53 > 0:02:55You hair's nice-ish.
0:02:55 > 0:02:58And one thing about Tracy?
0:02:59 > 0:03:02Her sensitivity.
0:03:02 > 0:03:04Well done.
0:03:06 > 0:03:12Stop that or you'll have to come back and complete the list of ten!
0:03:16 > 0:03:20You know, maybe Elaine's ideas will work. >
0:03:22 > 0:03:26Tracy and Justine fight. It's natural. They always have.
0:03:26 > 0:03:32< Always will. So what's all that about, then?
0:03:36 > 0:03:42You're a walking bag of bogeys! If I could, I'd soon sort you out!
0:03:51 > 0:03:54- In your dreams!- Yeah?- Yeah!- Ahem!
0:03:54 > 0:03:57THEY GIGGLE
0:03:57 > 0:03:59We need to settle this.
0:03:59 > 0:04:03- But if we do...- It's back inside with Elaine No Brain.
0:04:03 > 0:04:08- BOTH: No way! - How do we fight without fighting?
0:04:08 > 0:04:10Champions!
0:04:10 > 0:04:14- Champions?- Have they changed her medication again?
0:04:14 > 0:04:20Like in our class project. Knights of old jousting for their Princess!
0:04:20 > 0:04:25- < Jousting? - No, no, wrestling.
0:04:25 > 0:04:30- We... I could do bets. I'll give you great deals.- And whoever wins...
0:04:30 > 0:04:35- Gets to keep the channel changer for the whole day.- All week.
0:04:35 > 0:04:40- Done.- Done. Staff meeting's at four. They won't notice if we're quiet.
0:04:40 > 0:04:43Lady Muck, you can referee.
0:04:43 > 0:04:46I've a champion to find.
0:04:46 > 0:04:51- I'm going to have a talk to Lol. - Oooh(!)
0:04:52 > 0:04:57- Will you be my champion?- Why should I?- "What's in it for me?"
0:04:57 > 0:05:01Honestly! "Me, me, me! I, I, I! Self, self, self!"
0:05:01 > 0:05:04It's only Lol. I could cane him myself,
0:05:04 > 0:05:07but if you're too yellow, fine.
0:05:07 > 0:05:11I'll just find someone else, someone with guts.
0:05:11 > 0:05:15Never give a scaredy chicken boy a girl's job.
0:05:15 > 0:05:19Hang on! Who said I was scared?
0:05:19 > 0:05:24- Lol, we're having a wrestling match. - If you want.
0:05:25 > 0:05:27No, I need someone to fight FOR me.
0:05:27 > 0:05:30No worries. Grr!
0:05:30 > 0:05:33Not you. Muscles!
0:05:33 > 0:05:38He's a dedicated pacifist. He won't take part in violence of any kind.
0:05:38 > 0:05:43No matter what he or his manager are offered!
0:05:43 > 0:05:45Free snacks and drinks all weekend.
0:05:45 > 0:05:50Might not be enough. He's a difficult one to persuade.
0:05:50 > 0:05:55- What do you want?- You running about for us all day.- OK, deal.
0:05:55 > 0:05:59Seconds away, Beaker. Round One.
0:05:59 > 0:06:03Which idiot's got the channel changer?
0:06:03 > 0:06:06When I find out who's got it...
0:06:06 > 0:06:10Sorry, that is such a nice outfit. Give us a twirl.
0:06:10 > 0:06:13Oh, I can't.
0:06:13 > 0:06:16I've...got to...
0:06:16 > 0:06:20um...kiss a few frogs.
0:06:23 > 0:06:27- Beaker, fancy a flutter? - Bog off, Dog Breath!
0:06:27 > 0:06:29I'll give you 10/1 on Ben.
0:06:29 > 0:06:34- If I bet £1 on Ben and he wins, I get 10 back?- Is it a deal?
0:06:35 > 0:06:38I'll take whatever you've got.
0:06:38 > 0:06:42- Better still, just give me my winnings now.- Winnings?
0:06:42 > 0:06:45Do you think Ben can beat Bouncer?
0:06:45 > 0:06:47Bouncer?
0:06:48 > 0:06:53- What are you doing?- A warm-up, a swim, a sauna and I'm ready.
0:06:53 > 0:06:58No way! I have an intense exercise and diet programme for you.
0:06:58 > 0:07:01I'm only fighting that Plakova kid.
0:07:01 > 0:07:04I am only fighting that Plakova kid?
0:07:04 > 0:07:07Of course you are.
0:07:36 > 0:07:41Come on! Do you think Plakova's relaxing? Bouncer Plakova, that is!
0:07:41 > 0:07:43Bouncer?!
0:07:48 > 0:07:50Justine!
0:07:50 > 0:07:54- What?- Can you pass my personal stereo?
0:07:59 > 0:08:02Aren't you forgetting something?
0:08:04 > 0:08:08- A little word beginning with P? - Popcorn! Three bags.
0:08:14 > 0:08:18We're best friends, aren't we? Of course.
0:08:18 > 0:08:21So lend us some money. What for?
0:08:21 > 0:08:26Bouncer's going to be my champion, so I must buy Lol anything he wants.
0:08:26 > 0:08:28So?
0:08:28 > 0:08:33I'll... I mean, WE'LL get the channel changer all week.
0:08:33 > 0:08:38And when we don't want it, we can rent it out...for cash.
0:08:39 > 0:08:41And I still get Elaine back?
0:08:43 > 0:08:46I suppose so.
0:08:46 > 0:08:48Don't look.
0:08:57 > 0:09:00What's all these?
0:09:00 > 0:09:04IOUs? Who's had my money?
0:09:04 > 0:09:07"I O U £1." Justine!
0:09:07 > 0:09:10I'll pay you back. Promise!
0:09:17 > 0:09:19What are you doing?
0:09:19 > 0:09:25It should be square and the grown-ups will see, you squirt!
0:09:25 > 0:09:30- If you had any money, you could bet on Ben. Great odds.- I've got £5.
0:09:30 > 0:09:35- Why didn't you say? Where is it? - It's in my bank book.
0:09:36 > 0:09:39GIGGLING
0:09:45 > 0:09:49Hey, Adele! Not now. I'm going to the fight.
0:09:49 > 0:09:53I could do with a laugh. I've got a deal.
0:09:53 > 0:09:57I've had enough of Amber's deals. This isn't betting.
0:09:57 > 0:10:03Louise, you haven't got anything I'd be the slightest bit interested in.
0:10:05 > 0:10:09- "They'll never show up," you said. - Yeah, but...
0:10:09 > 0:10:13"He'll be too scared to show up." That's what you said!
0:10:13 > 0:10:16OK, I made a slight miscalculation.
0:10:16 > 0:10:21- Slight? I don't want to fight. - Just bluff it out. He's terrified.
0:10:21 > 0:10:24He'll back down. Trust me.
0:10:24 > 0:10:28Step back unless you want to be splattered by his blood!
0:10:28 > 0:10:34When I, the fair lady, drop my hanky, this battle will commence.
0:10:37 > 0:10:40Come on, mash him!
0:10:40 > 0:10:44ALL SHOUT ENCOURAGEMENT
0:10:48 > 0:10:50Will Ben be all right...?
0:10:58 > 0:11:02Whatever happens, I'll look after him.
0:11:14 > 0:11:17SHOUTS OF ENCOURAGEMENT
0:11:21 > 0:11:24GROWLS
0:11:31 > 0:11:33Aaaaagh!
0:11:37 > 0:11:41Lovely peaceful day. No rows, no aggro.
0:11:41 > 0:11:46- Modern discipline... - Carry on as if I'm not here.
0:11:46 > 0:11:51- No-one ever pays me attention anyway.- Tracy, what's going on?
0:11:51 > 0:11:56- Nothing. Where's the first-aid kid? - What?- What have you done?- Nothing.
0:11:56 > 0:12:00But don't believe little innocent Tracy.
0:12:00 > 0:12:03Get the lie detector, truth drugs,
0:12:03 > 0:12:06- thumb screws...- Tracy!
0:12:06 > 0:12:09Typical! I'm not doing anything.
0:12:09 > 0:12:13Every other kid could be involved in armed revolution,
0:12:13 > 0:12:15but who gets shouted at? Me!
0:12:15 > 0:12:19Armed revolution?!
0:12:21 > 0:12:24< SHOUTING
0:12:25 > 0:12:27You can't stop it. There's bets on.
0:12:27 > 0:12:32I prefer to thumb-wrestle. Me, too. Ringmaster 3.
0:12:32 > 0:12:35I've got 4. It's not out yet.
0:12:35 > 0:12:38Got an American cousin. Want a game?
0:12:38 > 0:12:40- Yeah, wicked!- What about the fight?
0:12:40 > 0:12:43- Finished!- Bets off! I keep the money.
0:12:43 > 0:12:46- No way!- Yes way!
0:12:46 > 0:12:51I want my money back now. Not unless you give me the changer.
0:12:51 > 0:12:53She can't cos I've got it.
0:12:53 > 0:12:58- ALL SHOUT AT ONCE - Please stop this. Please.
0:12:58 > 0:13:02ALL SHOUT AND ARGUE
0:13:02 > 0:13:07Get them to write down ten nice things they like about each other.
0:13:07 > 0:13:11- Calm down! Changer, please. - Don't give it to her.
0:13:11 > 0:13:16- Goody-goody!- Oh, Louise! Didn't you hear what we said?
0:13:17 > 0:13:21Disgraceful! There's only one person who deserves this.
0:13:23 > 0:13:26- Tracy...?- Thanks.
0:13:26 > 0:13:32- Tracy Beaker?- I'd love to stay, but wrestling's on!- Tracy!
0:13:34 > 0:13:40Subtitles by Subtext for BBC Broadcast 2003