Episode 5

Download Subtitles

Transcript

0:00:04 > 0:00:08Whoops, I Missed The Bus, CBBC's freshest and finest

0:00:08 > 0:00:13crammed like tiny sardines into the fastest 15 minutes ever.

0:00:13 > 0:00:16So are you up to date with the latest headlines?

0:00:16 > 0:00:17MAN SCREAMS

0:00:17 > 0:00:23- And has The Joke Machine made you LOL?- I'm not pathetic!

0:00:23 > 0:00:26- And what are this lot up to? - I'm after you, aren't I?

0:00:26 > 0:00:27It's all a bit hectic.

0:00:27 > 0:00:31If you want the answers to these questions then don't ask me,

0:00:31 > 0:00:35but our resident CBBC video bloggers Myles and Lauren are ready

0:00:35 > 0:00:37and waiting to fill in the gaps.

0:00:37 > 0:00:40- We won't be holding back.- No way.

0:00:40 > 0:00:42All aboard. Vroom!

0:00:42 > 0:00:47Ding ding! OK, sit down and strap in.

0:00:47 > 0:00:50It's time for your first blogger - Myles!

0:00:52 > 0:00:56Deadly Pole To Pole, I love it, I'm a big fan.

0:00:56 > 0:00:58What, no, this isn't a good joke.

0:00:58 > 0:01:02OK, I like the idea of going to new places and capturing it

0:01:02 > 0:01:03and sharing it with other people.

0:01:03 > 0:01:05So that's why I like Deadly Pole To Pole.

0:01:05 > 0:01:08And you're coming with me every step of the way.

0:01:08 > 0:01:11In the final episode, Steve finished his journey from pole to pole

0:01:11 > 0:01:13and ended up in Antarctica, which is pretty cool.

0:01:13 > 0:01:15That's why they had to wear coats.

0:01:15 > 0:01:17Steve really wants to swim with a leopard seal.

0:01:17 > 0:01:19Don't be thinking a leopard seal is half leopard, half seal,

0:01:19 > 0:01:22one's flapping, "I want to go in the sea," the other one's going,

0:01:22 > 0:01:25"No, I want to run." It's just a weird-looking seal.

0:01:25 > 0:01:28But if you want to swim with them you've got to be careful, because...

0:01:28 > 0:01:30Every leopard seal has a different personality.

0:01:30 > 0:01:32So if I'm going to go in the water with one, we'll need

0:01:32 > 0:01:34a seal that's curious of us.

0:01:34 > 0:01:37How do you work out what personality a seal's got? Romantic dinner?

0:01:37 > 0:01:38Just go on a date with a seal,

0:01:38 > 0:01:40then it eats me in the middle of a restaurant.

0:01:40 > 0:01:42Because, yes, we're in the middle of a restaurant,

0:01:42 > 0:01:44I had to get to know its personality.

0:01:44 > 0:01:47There were candles, music, nice food, then the waiter comes over.

0:01:47 > 0:01:48He's not going to get a tip.

0:01:48 > 0:01:51The seal's just sitting there, I've been eaten.

0:01:51 > 0:01:53"Are you ready to order, Seal? Sir?" "No, I've eaten."

0:01:53 > 0:01:56Anyway, how is Steve preparing himself to meet the seal?

0:01:56 > 0:02:00This first sight of a leopard seal up close has made us

0:02:00 > 0:02:02all a little bit nervous.

0:02:02 > 0:02:04I'm not sure I want to get in the water with that.

0:02:04 > 0:02:08It's fine, listen, just be yourself, compliment the seal.

0:02:08 > 0:02:12- That is a monster. - Don't say that, though, Steve.

0:02:12 > 0:02:14Why... Don't... What...

0:02:14 > 0:02:17But Steve finally does get to swim with his beloved seal.

0:02:17 > 0:02:22Look at that pair rolling around, pirouetting in front of us.

0:02:22 > 0:02:25Something I have waited a lifetime to see.

0:02:28 > 0:02:32That is so beautiful, that is so beautiful. That is so beautiful.

0:02:32 > 0:02:34I should probably say that a lot of other amazing...

0:02:34 > 0:02:35I can't see a thing.

0:02:35 > 0:02:38I should probably say that a lot of other amazing stuff does

0:02:38 > 0:02:39happen on Deadly Pole To Pole.

0:02:39 > 0:02:42It's not just him trying to make friends with a seal every week,

0:02:42 > 0:02:46although that would be amazing. I want to see that happen, CBBC.

0:02:46 > 0:02:47What I want to know is,

0:02:47 > 0:02:50why does Stevie B always get the good gigs, eh?

0:02:52 > 0:02:55Makes me livid. But what's been making you livid this week?

0:02:56 > 0:03:01What I hate about CBBC is none of the presenters do enough dancing.

0:03:01 > 0:03:06- Especially you, Yonko.- I can't... I can't do this. Turn off the music.

0:03:08 > 0:03:13CBBC, this is what makes me livid. That you stop at seven o'clock.

0:03:13 > 0:03:16Come on, can't you just have half an hour more?

0:03:16 > 0:03:19Nine! Nine has been missed...none.

0:03:20 > 0:03:24What makes me livid is that Wolfblood hasn't been on for ages

0:03:24 > 0:03:28- and me and my sister both love Wolfblood.- Now I'm livid too.

0:03:28 > 0:03:32- When's it going to be back?- CBBC, it makes you angry, doesn't it?

0:03:32 > 0:03:36Anyway, speaking of livid, Dot Com has been calmly dealing

0:03:36 > 0:03:39with more e-mails in the CBBC post room.

0:03:40 > 0:03:42Dear CBBC.

0:03:42 > 0:03:46Why, oh why must the so-called presenters insist on throwing

0:03:46 > 0:03:48cream pies in each other's faces?

0:03:48 > 0:03:50I'm sorry. Oh!

0:03:50 > 0:03:53- Yes!- Oh, Dodge.

0:03:53 > 0:03:56It's not funny, it's just silly.

0:03:56 > 0:03:59Who on earth thinks this will make people laugh? It's childish.

0:03:59 > 0:04:02Childish and ridiculous. And it makes me sick.

0:04:02 > 0:04:05It raises my hackles and infuriates me to the bones.

0:04:05 > 0:04:10It should not be tolerated on the BBC. I can't take it any more!

0:04:10 > 0:04:14See? Told you she was scary. Right, you lot, climb aboard

0:04:14 > 0:04:18for a trip behind the scenes of Friday Download.

0:04:18 > 0:04:20MUSIC PLAYS

0:04:20 > 0:04:23We're here at the filming of Friday Download.

0:04:23 > 0:04:24This is where the magic happens.

0:04:24 > 0:04:26So if you can see all around how many people

0:04:26 > 0:04:29we actually need to make the production itself.

0:04:29 > 0:04:32The most important people, the beautiful Friday Download audience.

0:04:32 > 0:04:34Say hello, everybody.

0:04:34 > 0:04:36- ALL:- Hi!

0:04:36 > 0:04:38MUSIC PLAYS

0:04:39 > 0:04:42We're about to go and film the opening, so we all go on and be like,

0:04:42 > 0:04:46"Cel, Shannon, the presenters, we run on and go..."

0:04:46 > 0:04:49- Dionne, Cel, Rick, Shannon. - I go that way, you go that way.

0:04:49 > 0:04:51- I'm after you, aren't I?- It's all a bit hectic.

0:04:51 > 0:04:54- Let's get ready to go. - Five seconds, four, three, two...

0:04:54 > 0:04:56CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

0:04:56 > 0:04:58# Oh, oh, oh Oh, oh, oh

0:04:58 > 0:05:00# Friday Download. #

0:05:00 > 0:05:03So here is where we do Hot Or Not and we also do our new download,

0:05:03 > 0:05:06Upload Download, and of course we do games here, don't we, Cel?

0:05:06 > 0:05:08Yes, we do do games,

0:05:08 > 0:05:11so we've got cool toys and gadgets behind me here. This is the screen

0:05:11 > 0:05:14- where we play any of the games on. I like this part of the set.- I do.

0:05:14 > 0:05:16This is where we sit and have a nice chat

0:05:16 > 0:05:19and we tell you what we think about the world.

0:05:19 > 0:05:21Yeah, this is the social communication area for us.

0:05:21 > 0:05:24OK, so this is inside the gallery, so everything that's

0:05:24 > 0:05:27filmed in the studio and all the sound is sent through to in here.

0:05:27 > 0:05:29All the important people along here.

0:05:29 > 0:05:32The speech goes through here in our earpieces.

0:05:32 > 0:05:35I think here as well is where the director sits.

0:05:35 > 0:05:37This is all his controls.

0:05:37 > 0:05:41A bit of power when you sit in this seat, actually.

0:05:41 > 0:05:43There's just so many buttons.

0:05:43 > 0:05:45MUSIC PLAYS

0:05:47 > 0:05:48- ALL:- Hi, we're The Vamps.

0:05:48 > 0:05:51You're watching a brand-new series of Friday Download.

0:05:51 > 0:05:53# Friday Download. #

0:05:53 > 0:05:56That's right, cheeky chumps The Vamps kicked off this series.

0:05:56 > 0:06:00- Give it up for The Vamps. - Yay, The Vamps are on. Yes!

0:06:00 > 0:06:01The Vamps, everybody.

0:06:01 > 0:06:03CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

0:06:03 > 0:06:04The Vamps!

0:06:04 > 0:06:07- I know, you just said! - The Vamps, everyone.

0:06:07 > 0:06:08Yeah, I know, you just told me.

0:06:08 > 0:06:10- The Vamps are here.- I know!

0:06:10 > 0:06:12- The Vamps.- I know!

0:06:12 > 0:06:16- We're The Vamps.- The Vomps?- Vamps. - Oh, The Vamps. Of course.

0:06:16 > 0:06:19- We're The Vamps.- The Vamps.- The Vamps.- The Vamps.- The Vamps.- Vamps.

0:06:19 > 0:06:22- Vamps.- Vamps.- Vamps.- Vamps. - The Vamps.- The Vamps.- Vamps.- Vamps.

0:06:22 > 0:06:23SHE SCREAMS

0:06:23 > 0:06:26Bake Download is a new feature for this series,

0:06:26 > 0:06:30where George shows us how to make cakes. Of course he does.

0:06:30 > 0:06:34But whoa, whoa, whoa, this is Bake Download,

0:06:34 > 0:06:37which means they make baking cool.

0:06:37 > 0:06:41He's whisking and dancing and he's break dancing while stuff's in

0:06:41 > 0:06:45the oven and best of all he's having ingredients lobbed at his head.

0:06:45 > 0:06:47Cool.

0:06:47 > 0:06:49MUSIC PLAYS

0:06:49 > 0:06:51SHE COUGHS

0:06:51 > 0:06:53What I like about Friday Download the most

0:06:53 > 0:06:56though is that every presenter has got, like, their own thing,

0:06:56 > 0:07:00their own talent, so Shannon, she's into films and fashion

0:07:00 > 0:07:04and Dionne, she's obviously the singer and George is a magician.

0:07:04 > 0:07:06And a baker, apparently.

0:07:06 > 0:07:09But I have always wondered, what's Richard's talent?

0:07:09 > 0:07:12I can raise one eyebrow, I can raise two, I can do a little worm,

0:07:12 > 0:07:14three eyebrows, you know?

0:07:14 > 0:07:17Oh, eyebrow wiggling, of course!

0:07:17 > 0:07:20MUSIC PLAYS

0:07:20 > 0:07:24I just think Richard's really funny. Like when this happened.

0:07:24 > 0:07:25What's everyone been up to 2014?

0:07:25 > 0:07:28I've actually been out of the country for most of it.

0:07:28 > 0:07:30I was in LA, yeah, working.

0:07:30 > 0:07:33Wow. LA. Glamorous.

0:07:33 > 0:07:35I went to see Manchester City play Barcelona at the Nou Camp

0:07:35 > 0:07:37in the Champions League.

0:07:37 > 0:07:39Football in Spain, amazing.

0:07:39 > 0:07:42- You are such a celeb, Cel.- I actually went to a Spanish island, Cel.

0:07:42 > 0:07:45I went to Tenerife for a week with the fam.

0:07:45 > 0:07:47And what about you, Richard? I bet you've been doing something

0:07:47 > 0:07:51equally fabulous - flying to New York in your own private plane, or...

0:07:51 > 0:07:52I've been doing a bit of golf.

0:07:52 > 0:07:53- Golf?- Golf.

0:07:53 > 0:07:56- Did he just say golf?- Golf.

0:07:56 > 0:07:59But don't forget, you guys, he can do this.

0:07:59 > 0:08:01MUSIC PLAYS

0:08:07 > 0:08:11The Joke Machine is about a guy. The joke guy.

0:08:11 > 0:08:15It's not what he's called, the joke man, the joke, Mr Joke,

0:08:15 > 0:08:18Sir Joke, John the joke - what's he called?

0:08:18 > 0:08:23He is... The Joke Master.

0:08:23 > 0:08:24Did his parents call him that?

0:08:24 > 0:08:27"Oh, what a beautiful baby boy. What are you going to call him?"

0:08:27 > 0:08:28"The Joke Master."

0:08:28 > 0:08:32"No, what are you going to call him?" "The Joke Master." No?

0:08:32 > 0:08:33Yeah, that's a good one.

0:08:33 > 0:08:36So the Joke Master, master, I'm just going to call him John,

0:08:36 > 0:08:40he has a spaceship and he flies all around, picks up kids

0:08:40 > 0:08:43and gets them to tell him jokes. He does that all day.

0:08:43 > 0:08:45I'm not pathetic!

0:08:45 > 0:08:48You know who's pathetic?

0:08:48 > 0:08:50I... It's not me.

0:08:50 > 0:08:53I don't know if that's his job or if that's just a hobby.

0:08:53 > 0:08:57If it is, it's fine. I like hanging out with friends and swimming.

0:08:57 > 0:08:58We're all different.

0:08:58 > 0:09:01Also, he is pretty harsh to people who tell bad jokes.

0:09:01 > 0:09:03It's not going to encourage anybody to go on if every time

0:09:03 > 0:09:06you say something and it doesn't get a laugh you get hammered.

0:09:06 > 0:09:09Why is that happening? Shall we go on and tell some jokes?

0:09:09 > 0:09:11No, did you not hear what happened to Timmy?

0:09:12 > 0:09:14BOY SCREAMS

0:09:15 > 0:09:18- Start running, buddy. - I'm a big fan of jokes.

0:09:18 > 0:09:20I like looking at something in the world and going, "Hm,

0:09:20 > 0:09:23"that's slightly interesting, let's make a joke about it,"

0:09:23 > 0:09:26so I thought whilst we're all here watching this I'd show off

0:09:26 > 0:09:28some of my own jokes, see what I can do.

0:09:28 > 0:09:31- Please be funny, please be funny, please be funny.- Knock, knock.

0:09:31 > 0:09:32Oh, come in.

0:09:32 > 0:09:34You're not funny. Sorry.

0:09:34 > 0:09:37Joke you later, jokesters.

0:09:37 > 0:09:38"Joke you later." Surely not?

0:09:38 > 0:09:41Surely that's not what he's going to go for for his catch phrase.

0:09:41 > 0:09:43"Joke you later." What does that mean?

0:09:43 > 0:09:45He could have had anything, you know, maybe,

0:09:45 > 0:09:50"That's enough jokes for today. Those were all the jokes. Goodbye."

0:09:50 > 0:09:54Keeps it simple, makes sense. "Joke you later" - what does that mean?

0:09:54 > 0:09:57I've got one, I've got one! Why did the chicken cross the road?

0:09:57 > 0:10:01To watch CBBC. Don't believe me? Check this out.

0:10:01 > 0:10:03What are you thinking, pet?

0:10:03 > 0:10:06- IN A SILLY VOICE:- Oh, look at that handsome creature.

0:10:06 > 0:10:08Oh, and that Steve Backshall's not bad, either.

0:10:08 > 0:10:11Oh, I mean, if I had to go on a date with one of them, it'd probably be

0:10:11 > 0:10:15the peregrine falcon. Oh, but then again that Steve is lovely.

0:10:15 > 0:10:18Oh, I can't decide. How's a girl supposed to choose?

0:10:18 > 0:10:20I'm off to find them both. Watch out, boys.

0:10:20 > 0:10:21Cluck.

0:10:22 > 0:10:25- IN A DIFFERENT VOICE:- Oh, it's CBBC, he's all at sea.

0:10:25 > 0:10:28If I was all at sea I'd probably set sail in this little shoe box.

0:10:28 > 0:10:30A fine-looking vessel.

0:10:30 > 0:10:33Hi there, maties.

0:10:33 > 0:10:35- IN A JAMAICAN ACCENT:- Oh, one of these days

0:10:35 > 0:10:37I'll have my own TV show, just like Scooby-Doo.

0:10:37 > 0:10:41And I'll be able to get my hair shampooed every day. Oh, fabulous.

0:10:41 > 0:10:47So, fancy watching your pet on CBBC watching... Well, CBBC?

0:10:47 > 0:10:52Search "pet" on the CBBC website for more information.

0:10:52 > 0:10:56DNN, which stands for Definitely Not Newsround - I'm not being funny

0:10:56 > 0:10:59but it's a good job it isn't Newsround.

0:10:59 > 0:11:04Call me old-fashioned, but you know I'd rather not see Nel do this.

0:11:04 > 0:11:06I'm not even remotely surprised.

0:11:06 > 0:11:10Sometimes I think the definitely definitely Newsround guys must

0:11:10 > 0:11:13get quite jealous of the Definitely Not Newsround guys.

0:11:13 > 0:11:16Like, Leah and that, they have to be quite serious

0:11:16 > 0:11:19because, you know, what they're doing is proper serious journalism,

0:11:19 > 0:11:23where, you know, they nod their heads a lot in seriousness.

0:11:23 > 0:11:26Whereas DNN and that lot are messing about taking

0:11:26 > 0:11:27selfies of their bums.

0:11:27 > 0:11:29Oh, I've got an idea, Jahmene.

0:11:29 > 0:11:32Thought I'd do something for Bob.

0:11:32 > 0:11:36Good evening. I'm Lauren Layfield. Our top story tonight.

0:11:36 > 0:11:41Scandal at DNN as man takes photograph of his own bottom.

0:11:41 > 0:11:44We ask why and how.

0:11:45 > 0:11:49But mainly why. Why would you ever do that? Why? Why?

0:11:49 > 0:11:53However, there was a moment a little while ago on Newsround

0:11:53 > 0:11:58where a certain Ricky Boleto took a leaf out of DNN's book

0:11:58 > 0:12:00and got a little bit crazy himself.

0:12:00 > 0:12:02Newsround's back just before seven.

0:12:02 > 0:12:04I will see you then. Bye-bye.

0:12:04 > 0:12:06Ooh, ooh, ooh. Ooh.

0:12:06 > 0:12:10Move over, Bob Roberts, we've got a new crazy presenter in town

0:12:10 > 0:12:13- and his name's Boleto.- Bye-bye. Ooh.

0:12:13 > 0:12:17In this week's DNN, Jahmene Mann hit the streets in search

0:12:17 > 0:12:19of Britain's best scary monsters.

0:12:19 > 0:12:22CHILDREN SCREAM

0:12:22 > 0:12:24- Hello, mate.- Hello. - JAHMENE SCREAMS

0:12:24 > 0:12:25CHILD SCREAMS

0:12:28 > 0:12:29CHILD SCREAMS

0:12:29 > 0:12:31I'd give that a thumbs-up.

0:12:31 > 0:12:32Ow!

0:12:32 > 0:12:35I mean, if he wanted to find something absolutely terrifying, he

0:12:35 > 0:12:39should have just nipped round Barney Harwood's first thing in the morning.

0:12:39 > 0:12:41WOLF WHISTLE

0:12:41 > 0:12:44That's a joke! I'm joking, Barney Harwood.

0:12:44 > 0:12:46It's that time again.

0:12:46 > 0:12:50It's this week's highlights and lowlights, from CBBC.

0:12:50 > 0:12:53But if anybody's looking for Yonko, could you tell him

0:12:53 > 0:12:55I'm not on the bus, driver.

0:12:55 > 0:12:58# Rio 2014 Rio 2014

0:12:58 > 0:13:00# Rio 2014

0:13:00 > 0:13:02# Just watch that trophy gleam

0:13:02 > 0:13:04# It's Uggy's greatest dream

0:13:04 > 0:13:06# I'm the cat who's got the cream

0:13:06 > 0:13:09# Summertime. #

0:13:09 > 0:13:12- Katie, what are you doing?- I'm just playing with my horses, Chris.

0:13:12 > 0:13:14KATIE LAUGHS

0:13:14 > 0:13:18- This is Mr Confident Leg.- Nice to meet you.- This is Mr Fluffy Boots.

0:13:18 > 0:13:22Katie, can I just stop you there? You're clearly having a lot of fun.

0:13:22 > 0:13:26I hate to point this out, but horses have been banned from the office.

0:13:26 > 0:13:28- What?- Yeah.- This is an outrage. Since when?

0:13:28 > 0:13:31Since I was handed this chart to explain that horses have been

0:13:31 > 0:13:33banned from the office, so.

0:13:33 > 0:13:38# Hey, hey, that's all the big boy now, that's you I've got to save

0:13:38 > 0:13:43# Hey, hey, get through to the light and you will never hurt again. #

0:13:43 > 0:13:44What are you doing?

0:13:44 > 0:13:47I'm just playing with this watermelon instead,

0:13:47 > 0:13:49you know, because the horses are banned.

0:13:51 > 0:13:54I hate to be the bearer of bad news once again, Katie, but er...

0:13:55 > 0:13:58SHOUTING

0:13:58 > 0:14:01Oh, he's got you back, man, go on. Find Nicola.

0:14:04 > 0:14:07Oh, go on, do your work. None of it matters.

0:14:07 > 0:14:08MUSIC PLAYS

0:14:08 > 0:14:09Ah!

0:14:10 > 0:14:13MUSIC PLAYS

0:14:13 > 0:14:20Stop. Stop. That is supposed to be in sequence, as in all together.

0:14:20 > 0:14:25You are acting like J-Troupe. Go back to the beginning.

0:14:25 > 0:14:27- Guys...- Oh!

0:14:27 > 0:14:29cbbc@bbc.co.uk, I'm in a panic!

0:14:29 > 0:14:33- Delete. - TENSE MUSIC PLAYS

0:14:36 > 0:14:37COMPUTER PINGS

0:14:37 > 0:14:39- ELECTRONIC VOICE:- Record erasure completed.

0:14:39 > 0:14:40Mitchell Tanner deleted.

0:14:40 > 0:14:42Yes.

0:14:42 > 0:14:43Who are you?

0:14:43 > 0:14:45And that is it.

0:14:45 > 0:14:47You are up to the moment on the world of CBBC.

0:14:47 > 0:14:50Don't worry if you miss any of your favourite shows this week

0:14:50 > 0:14:52because we'll be back next Saturday to fill in the gaps.

0:14:52 > 0:14:53BUS BELL DINGS

0:14:53 > 0:14:57Hang on, what's that noise? Oh, whoops, I've missed the bus!