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0:00:02 > 0:00:05Behold the secrets of the Dracula Clan...

0:00:05 > 0:00:07We are vampires!

0:00:07 > 0:00:12..as told by four vampires and one hideously drooling drudge.

0:00:12 > 0:00:16Each with their own side of the story to tell.

0:00:20 > 0:00:22Vladimir Dracula...

0:00:25 > 0:00:28- ..also known as Vladdy...- Yes!

0:00:28 > 0:00:30Vlad and the Chosen One.

0:00:33 > 0:00:37The spiritual leader of the world's vampire clans.

0:00:37 > 0:00:41What an honour when I, Bertrand De Fortunesa,

0:00:41 > 0:00:46was entrusted with guiding Vlad in fulfilling this destiny.

0:00:46 > 0:00:48A momentous responsibility

0:00:48 > 0:00:52and one I wish to share with future vampire generations.

0:00:52 > 0:00:56So, I will set down here, in this journal...

0:00:58 > 0:01:03..an account of the events that shaped Vlad's rise to glory.

0:01:05 > 0:01:10And how, under my tutelage, he was an unprecedented success.

0:01:10 > 0:01:15In keeping with most vampire clans, the members of the Dracula Family

0:01:15 > 0:01:17possess the most abhorrent qualities.

0:01:17 > 0:01:18Back stabbing treachery...

0:01:19 > 0:01:22You devious, conniving witch.

0:01:22 > 0:01:25..unscrupulous craving for power...

0:01:28 > 0:01:31..and a taste for random acts of cruelty.

0:01:31 > 0:01:36On top of all that, it's not unknown for them to tell the odd lie

0:01:36 > 0:01:38or ten.

0:01:39 > 0:01:43Not that you would describe young Vladimir as a born liar.

0:01:43 > 0:01:45Far from it, in fact.

0:01:45 > 0:01:47But when your father and role model is Count Dracula,

0:01:47 > 0:01:50stuff is bound to rub off.

0:01:50 > 0:01:52Picture the scene.

0:01:52 > 0:01:55On the one hand, an obstinate teenage vampire

0:01:55 > 0:01:58who insists all he wants is to live in peace and harmony

0:01:58 > 0:02:02doing normal, breather stuff like playing rugby.

0:02:02 > 0:02:05On the other hand, the wily father,

0:02:05 > 0:02:08keen to show by example the power of tricks and cheating.

0:02:08 > 0:02:09Repeat it back to me.

0:02:09 > 0:02:13- I must not bite ears, kick shins or elbow the other players.- Until?

0:02:13 > 0:02:16Until I'm sure the referee can't see me.

0:02:16 > 0:02:18Now we're talking rugby!

0:02:18 > 0:02:20- But, Dad, it's cheating! - I know, isn't it fun?

0:02:20 > 0:02:22Right, let's try some offensive play.

0:02:22 > 0:02:25I'll tackle. Renfield!

0:02:25 > 0:02:28You two, try and block me.

0:02:28 > 0:02:29Tackle me?

0:02:29 > 0:02:31Ready?

0:02:31 > 0:02:34One... two... three...

0:02:36 > 0:02:37GO!

0:02:44 > 0:02:49For the dead travel fast, as they say in my homeland.

0:02:49 > 0:02:52I know, I know. I make it look so easy.

0:02:52 > 0:02:55It was Vlad's turn next.

0:02:55 > 0:02:59Not that that meant an end to the Count's skulduggery and deceit.

0:02:59 > 0:03:01Now, Vlad. To the attack!

0:03:05 > 0:03:08No-one gets past Renfield the Repulsive.

0:03:08 > 0:03:10This is useless. I'm never going to get on the team.

0:03:10 > 0:03:12Don't be ridiculous. Of course you will.

0:03:12 > 0:03:14He'll never get on the team. What's wrong with him?

0:03:14 > 0:03:18He needs to get a thirst for it, Your Evilness.

0:03:18 > 0:03:20Ah, a thirst to succeed?

0:03:20 > 0:03:22Come to think of it, all this violent exercise

0:03:22 > 0:03:24has given me a thirst.

0:03:25 > 0:03:29Vlad... Your dad's got that funny look in his eyes again.

0:03:29 > 0:03:33Don't worry, you won't feel a thing.

0:03:33 > 0:03:35After you're dead, anyway.

0:03:35 > 0:03:38- VLAD!- Dad, stop!

0:03:38 > 0:03:41- Friends are not food, remember? - I knew you could do it.

0:03:44 > 0:03:47Was all that a trick?

0:03:50 > 0:03:54Of course, a trick! Very funny.

0:03:54 > 0:03:56- How could you? - Just proving a point.

0:03:56 > 0:04:00You see, you can use your powers when you want to.

0:04:00 > 0:04:02But Dad, I didn't use any powers.

0:04:02 > 0:04:06Well then how did you get past Renfield the Repulsive?

0:04:06 > 0:04:08With a well aimed tackle.

0:04:09 > 0:04:11Back then, the Count had the upper hand

0:04:11 > 0:04:15and could manipulate his son with guile and trickery

0:04:15 > 0:04:16until the bats came home.

0:04:16 > 0:04:19But not any more.

0:04:24 > 0:04:27Renfield! Take a letter.

0:04:27 > 0:04:30Straight away, master.

0:04:30 > 0:04:32Ooh! Impressive.

0:04:32 > 0:04:34I need to write to the Vampires Advice Bureau

0:04:34 > 0:04:36on a most pressing matter.

0:04:36 > 0:04:38Shoot!

0:04:38 > 0:04:41- Dear sir...- Dear sir. - Or madam...- Or Madam.

0:04:41 > 0:04:44I have a problem and would be obliged

0:04:44 > 0:04:46if you could offer some advice.

0:04:46 > 0:04:52It's about my son. At heart he's honest, decent and truthful.

0:04:52 > 0:04:53A pretty straight kind of guy.

0:04:53 > 0:04:59I don't want to be an evil vampire! I want to be an ordinary boy!

0:04:59 > 0:05:02Absolutely devastating for me, as you can imagine.

0:05:02 > 0:05:05I have tried my very best to bring out the deceitful, devious nature

0:05:05 > 0:05:09I knew must be lurking in there somewhere

0:05:09 > 0:05:12by setting a thoroughly dishonest example for him to follow.

0:05:12 > 0:05:16But gradually he started to see through my web

0:05:16 > 0:05:18of lies and deceit.

0:05:18 > 0:05:20I'm not going to lie to you, Vladdy.

0:05:20 > 0:05:24Good, because I can tell when you're lying. Your eyes glow yellow.

0:05:24 > 0:05:26- Do they? Really?- Yeah.

0:05:26 > 0:05:28Well, I never knew that.

0:05:28 > 0:05:30That's the trouble with having no reflection.

0:05:30 > 0:05:32Anyway, you were saying?

0:05:32 > 0:05:36I was saying, being a vampire is your destiny.

0:05:36 > 0:05:39And nothing you can do will ever change that.

0:05:39 > 0:05:41- Is that clear?- Totally.

0:05:41 > 0:05:43- Just one question.- Mmm?

0:05:43 > 0:05:45Why are your eyes shut?

0:05:45 > 0:05:48'It would appear he could read me like a book.'

0:05:48 > 0:05:50And not only that...

0:05:50 > 0:05:53he started to use his own sneaky ruses on me.

0:05:54 > 0:05:56Deceitful little fox.

0:05:56 > 0:06:01Hand over the sweets - or I'll book you in for a check-up with Renfield.

0:06:01 > 0:06:04Renfield?

0:06:04 > 0:06:05Sorry, Dad.

0:06:05 > 0:06:10What was I thinking? I'll never eat sweets again. I promise.

0:06:22 > 0:06:24Phew! That was a narrow escape.

0:06:24 > 0:06:28Why are you smiling? You've lost all your sweets.

0:06:28 > 0:06:31You don't grow up living with the Prince Of Darkness

0:06:31 > 0:06:33without picking up the odd trick or two.

0:06:33 > 0:06:36He set light to my pyjamas.

0:06:36 > 0:06:38So far, so bad, I thought.

0:06:39 > 0:06:43My Vladdy's a chip off the old fang when it comes to pulling a fast one.

0:06:43 > 0:06:47'But that brings me to my little...difficulty.

0:06:47 > 0:06:49'I didn't see this coming,

0:06:49 > 0:06:52'but maybe he's become a little too good

0:06:52 > 0:06:53'at getting one over on his father.

0:06:53 > 0:06:56'Especially since he's been through the blood mirror.'

0:06:56 > 0:06:59How do I know I can trust you?

0:06:59 > 0:07:02Oh, great. After all these years

0:07:02 > 0:07:05I'm finally the son you want me to be, and you don't trust me?

0:07:05 > 0:07:10Make up your mind, Daddy. Which Vlad you want?

0:07:11 > 0:07:14The old fangless wimp you could trust with your grandmother?

0:07:14 > 0:07:16Or me?

0:07:16 > 0:07:18Well, you, clearly.

0:07:18 > 0:07:22- Then let me out. - Right.- Let me make you proud of me.

0:07:22 > 0:07:24- Master, no!- Shut it, Renfield!

0:07:24 > 0:07:28What would you know of the trust between a vampire and his son?

0:07:28 > 0:07:30Well, clearly a lot more than you.

0:07:30 > 0:07:32Ah!

0:07:32 > 0:07:34Renfield!

0:07:34 > 0:07:36Do something!

0:07:36 > 0:07:38'I hate to admit this,

0:07:38 > 0:07:42'but it appears the pupil has overtaken the master.

0:07:42 > 0:07:46'Things have calmed down a bit lately,

0:07:46 > 0:07:49'but when a young fang has outwitted his father

0:07:49 > 0:07:51'and left him for undead once...'

0:07:51 > 0:07:52No!

0:07:52 > 0:07:53No!

0:07:53 > 0:07:56'..I fear, what's to stop him doing it again?'

0:07:56 > 0:07:58No! Agh!

0:07:58 > 0:07:59Renfield!

0:07:59 > 0:08:00BELL RINGS

0:08:00 > 0:08:01Ooh! That'll be lunch!

0:08:01 > 0:08:04Vladdy! Vladdy! Vladimir! You can't just leave me like this!

0:08:04 > 0:08:05See ya!

0:08:05 > 0:08:07I'll die!

0:08:07 > 0:08:10All advice you might be able to give would be gratefully received.

0:08:10 > 0:08:13And bearing in mind the delicacy of this matter,

0:08:13 > 0:08:17I'm sure you can understand my reasons for staying anonymous.

0:08:17 > 0:08:19"For staying...an annoying mouse."

0:08:19 > 0:08:21Right, I think that's it!

0:08:21 > 0:08:24- Ciao!- Ciao.

0:08:24 > 0:08:27"Yours sincerely, Count Dracula,

0:08:27 > 0:08:29"father of the Chosen One."

0:08:33 > 0:08:37So what of Vlad? Mr honest and truthful?

0:08:38 > 0:08:42Time for a quick rifle through his not-so-secret secret notebook.

0:08:45 > 0:08:48This isn't something that I'm proud of.

0:08:48 > 0:08:50The truth of the matter is,

0:08:50 > 0:08:53there are times when I'm not as honest as I'd like to be.

0:08:53 > 0:08:56INGRID: Right Vlad, you rancid little worm! >

0:08:56 > 0:08:57Quick! Hide! Hide!

0:08:59 > 0:09:02Ah! Here you are - in MY room.

0:09:02 > 0:09:04It's not your room.

0:09:04 > 0:09:06What's that smell?

0:09:06 > 0:09:07I guess it started small.

0:09:07 > 0:09:10When I was a kid, there was the usual

0:09:10 > 0:09:11trying to stay out of trouble stuff

0:09:11 > 0:09:15that led to the odd fib...or two.

0:09:15 > 0:09:21- Smell? What smell? Can you smell a smell, Zoltan?- No, Master Vlad.

0:09:21 > 0:09:24Only your sister's cheap perfume.

0:09:24 > 0:09:26Shut it, four wheels!

0:09:26 > 0:09:32I can smell something different. Something rather...ugh!

0:09:32 > 0:09:33- A-ha!- No!

0:09:33 > 0:09:36I can't wait to tell Dad about this.

0:09:36 > 0:09:37- I can explain.- Oh, yeah(!)

0:09:37 > 0:09:40Climbed in through the window, nothing to do with me.

0:09:40 > 0:09:44A massive pile of dirty laundry climbed in through the window?

0:09:47 > 0:09:52- What? Where did he go? - Who, the dirty sock fairy?

0:09:52 > 0:09:53Er, yeah.

0:09:54 > 0:09:58Hmm. Honest Vlad, indeed.

0:10:01 > 0:10:05'Of course, it's hardly surprising Vlad ended up

0:10:05 > 0:10:06'resorting to lies from time to time.

0:10:06 > 0:10:09'He needed to use every trick in the book.

0:10:09 > 0:10:13'That is, if he didn't want his best breather friend to end up as lunch.'

0:10:13 > 0:10:15Come to Daddy!

0:10:17 > 0:10:20Daddy. Can I have a word?

0:10:20 > 0:10:23Not you! I'm trying to find dinner.

0:10:23 > 0:10:25Well, it's just...

0:10:25 > 0:10:31- I think I've...got my first fang. - A fang? Oh, my boy!

0:10:31 > 0:10:36Let me have a look. Hmm. I can't see anything.

0:10:36 > 0:10:39Never mind, my favourite child.

0:10:39 > 0:10:42So, as time went on, on the odd occasion

0:10:42 > 0:10:47maybe I did become ever so slightly...economic with the facts.

0:10:47 > 0:10:50Once or twice.

0:10:50 > 0:10:54That statement contains about four lies in itself.

0:10:54 > 0:10:59But that was just kids stuff. As Vlad got older, the stakes got higher.

0:10:59 > 0:11:01Take the legendary occasion

0:11:01 > 0:11:04'when he took on a true master of deceit at his own game.'

0:11:08 > 0:11:11Vlad, Vlad, Vlad.

0:11:11 > 0:11:14Come on, it's me, Boris.

0:11:14 > 0:11:16I wouldn't hurt a fly.

0:11:18 > 0:11:19Really?

0:11:19 > 0:11:23'It's well known that once cousin Boris had merged with his evil side

0:11:23 > 0:11:26'in the blood mirror, you could tell when he was lying.

0:11:26 > 0:11:28'Because his lips were moving.'

0:11:29 > 0:11:33- "I'm not evil(!)" - HE CHUCKLES

0:11:33 > 0:11:36Want a bet?

0:11:36 > 0:11:39Mirror, mirror on the floor,

0:11:39 > 0:11:43you've given me power, but I want more.

0:11:46 > 0:11:49'So here was Boris pretending nothing had changed,

0:11:49 > 0:11:53'while actually draining the Count and his own father of power,

0:11:53 > 0:11:58'turning them old so he could take control of the family all by himself.

0:11:58 > 0:12:03'But Boris the demon deceiver was no match for honest Vlad

0:12:03 > 0:12:06'when it came to twisting the facts to his own advantage.'

0:12:07 > 0:12:10Vlad, you could join me.

0:12:10 > 0:12:13Picture it - the Bat Pack ruling together,

0:12:13 > 0:12:16people obeying our every command, the power, the glory!

0:12:18 > 0:12:19The girls.

0:12:21 > 0:12:22Let's do it.

0:12:22 > 0:12:26- You wouldn't dare! - Stay out of this, Ingrid.

0:12:26 > 0:12:29On one condition. We have to be on equal terms.

0:12:29 > 0:12:31You have to give me some of your power now.

0:12:31 > 0:12:33Even things out a little.

0:12:36 > 0:12:38Agreed.

0:12:38 > 0:12:40You won't regret this, Cuz.

0:12:46 > 0:12:49No! What are you doing?

0:12:55 > 0:13:00- Big mistake, Boris! - You will pay for this!

0:13:00 > 0:13:03Vlad had saved the Count and his brother.

0:13:03 > 0:13:07So, it was hats off to him,

0:13:07 > 0:13:12and a straitjacket with restraining mask on for Boris.

0:13:12 > 0:13:17BORIS LAUGHS HYSTERICALLY

0:13:17 > 0:13:19'The way Bertrand De Fortunessa sees it,

0:13:19 > 0:13:22'in troubled times being straight with people all the time

0:13:22 > 0:13:24'just isn't enough.

0:13:24 > 0:13:28'And while young Vlad might insist that he is a beacon of truth

0:13:28 > 0:13:31'and trustworthiness, that's not the whole story.

0:13:31 > 0:13:35'The Count certainly tried to school his son in the ways of

0:13:35 > 0:13:38'guile and trickery by setting a bad example.

0:13:38 > 0:13:40'Vlad might sometimes have been reluctant to take those

0:13:40 > 0:13:44'lessons on board, but you don't spend your entire life with

0:13:44 > 0:13:47'the Prince Of Darkness without something rubbing off.

0:13:47 > 0:13:51'So much so, that the father needs to take care that he doesn't

0:13:51 > 0:13:55'fall victim to his son, especially since Vlad's powers have grown

0:13:55 > 0:13:57'and eclipsed those of his father.

0:13:58 > 0:14:01'To be honest, though, for Vlad,

0:14:01 > 0:14:04'the rise to power has not been an easy thing to cope with.'

0:14:04 > 0:14:08'When I was younger, I never imagined for one second

0:14:08 > 0:14:11'that my life would end up the way it has.'

0:14:11 > 0:14:13That's my Vladdy!

0:14:13 > 0:14:16Vampires be gone!

0:14:18 > 0:14:19The thing is, though,

0:14:19 > 0:14:23and this is something that the rest of the family will NEVER understand,

0:14:23 > 0:14:25if I do ever bend the truth,

0:14:25 > 0:14:28it's always with the best intentions.

0:14:28 > 0:14:31Mortals, approach me.

0:14:32 > 0:14:35'Like the mind wipe thing.

0:14:37 > 0:14:41'Being named as the Chosen One meant that just living a normal life

0:14:41 > 0:14:45'was no longer an option.'

0:14:45 > 0:14:47Why must we destroy each other?

0:14:47 > 0:14:50Can we not live together in harmony?

0:14:52 > 0:14:56You will leave this place and remember nothing of vampires.

0:14:56 > 0:14:59We do not exist.

0:14:59 > 0:15:03'For everyone's sake, I needed to take control,

0:15:03 > 0:15:05'and that meant spinning a massive lie,

0:15:05 > 0:15:07'wiping many human minds of all knowledge of vampires

0:15:07 > 0:15:11'in the hope of a peaceful future.'

0:15:15 > 0:15:17Now go!

0:15:20 > 0:15:25- What a lovely family.- We are so lucky to have them as neighbours.

0:15:25 > 0:15:29Yes, I know it did turn the Branaghs' and the Van Helsings'

0:15:29 > 0:15:31whole lives into a lie,

0:15:31 > 0:15:35but I really thought it was for the best.

0:15:35 > 0:15:39Not that Jonno Van Helsing sees it like that though.

0:15:39 > 0:15:43My dad's dead and it's all because of you.

0:15:43 > 0:15:46You said it was an accident.

0:15:46 > 0:15:48A bunch of vampires attacked him.

0:15:48 > 0:15:51And because of your mind wipe, he never stood a chance.

0:15:51 > 0:15:54- Jonno, I'm so sorry.- You will be.

0:15:56 > 0:15:58I meant what I said.

0:15:58 > 0:16:02All right? I wish I'd never put the mind wipe on your dad

0:16:02 > 0:16:05- and I never meant for him to get hurt. I...- Vlad. Don't. Let's go.

0:16:07 > 0:16:08I'm truly sorry.

0:16:18 > 0:16:24I can't say how much I regret that. And that is no lie.

0:16:25 > 0:16:27And then there was Renfield and his mind wipe.

0:16:29 > 0:16:32Dad took him back, but this was a very different Renfield

0:16:32 > 0:16:35we were talking about. I'd be lying if I said

0:16:35 > 0:16:37there were no plus points.

0:16:37 > 0:16:39Good morning, gentlemen.

0:16:39 > 0:16:41What can I get you for breakfast?

0:16:41 > 0:16:43I have eggs.

0:16:44 > 0:16:47Scrambled, poached, fried, boiled.

0:16:47 > 0:16:51Bacon, sausage, mushroom, tomato, kippers.

0:16:51 > 0:16:55Crumpets, muffins, waffles, pancakes, porridge, cornflakes.

0:16:57 > 0:16:59And toast.

0:16:59 > 0:17:04- Every morning, it's the same. - I can't undo the memory wipe.

0:17:04 > 0:17:07It's so strong, it keeps rewiping his brain.

0:17:09 > 0:17:12Look at this reflection.

0:17:12 > 0:17:15Does anything seem strange to you?

0:17:15 > 0:17:17- It's just me.- Atta boy.

0:17:19 > 0:17:20How are you doing that?

0:17:22 > 0:17:25I have been around 600 years.

0:17:25 > 0:17:28I sleep in a coffin, I drink blood,

0:17:28 > 0:17:32and I move with unnatural speed.

0:17:32 > 0:17:35Ringing any bells?

0:17:35 > 0:17:36But...

0:17:36 > 0:17:40- But that's impossible. - Not if you're a vampire.

0:17:44 > 0:17:47Time for the Memoirs de Renfield

0:17:47 > 0:17:50to cover a difficult period...

0:17:51 > 0:17:53..my lost years.

0:17:55 > 0:17:57I don't remember much

0:17:57 > 0:18:00other than I found myself alone...

0:18:01 > 0:18:05..wandering outside castle walls

0:18:05 > 0:18:09and then, the master, he took me in.

0:18:09 > 0:18:13'But for some strange reason, I really wasn't myself.

0:18:13 > 0:18:18'My complexion no longer had its attractive yellow tinge,

0:18:18 > 0:18:22'I had an urge to wash my hands every time I went to the toilet.

0:18:22 > 0:18:24'And most peculiarly of all,

0:18:24 > 0:18:26'I didn't know slug fricassee

0:18:26 > 0:18:29'from sewer-rat chateaubriand.'

0:18:29 > 0:18:31What is that?

0:18:31 > 0:18:35Bat phlegm with the merest hint of rosemary.

0:18:35 > 0:18:39Rat mucus and brine.

0:18:39 > 0:18:40'I used to be a gastric gourmet,

0:18:40 > 0:18:43'a culinary artist, an intrepid pioneer

0:18:43 > 0:18:46'seeking out new territory for the taste buds.'

0:18:46 > 0:18:49- What is it?- Roadkill stew.

0:18:49 > 0:18:52- 'But all of a sudden...' - I'm starving.

0:18:52 > 0:18:55'..that creative daring in the kitchen had gone.'

0:18:55 > 0:18:57On the menu this evening we have for starters

0:18:57 > 0:19:01partridge ravioli with a girolles and black truffle sauce

0:19:01 > 0:19:05followed by Welsh beef, wilted spinach and potato rosti

0:19:05 > 0:19:09with a home-made horseradish sauce.

0:19:09 > 0:19:14Truth be told, I had completely lost my touch.

0:19:15 > 0:19:17But then one day,

0:19:17 > 0:19:22as inexplicably and suddenly as I'd lost it,

0:19:22 > 0:19:26my skills with exotic food had returned.

0:19:26 > 0:19:28Just like that.

0:19:29 > 0:19:32I still don't know how it had happened.

0:19:32 > 0:19:35All I remember is that it was just around the time

0:19:35 > 0:19:37that Mistress Ingrid got really ill.

0:19:37 > 0:19:42To cure a vampire illness, we will need a specialist in the dark arts,

0:19:42 > 0:19:43an alchemist,

0:19:43 > 0:19:48someone who's dared to probe into the dark places,

0:19:48 > 0:19:50no matter how twisted and wrong.

0:19:51 > 0:19:54Renfield. He means Renfield.

0:19:54 > 0:19:57- Sir?- Mistress Ingrid is very ill.

0:19:59 > 0:20:01Would she like a cup of tea?

0:20:01 > 0:20:04Dad might not have been a big fan of the new Renfield,

0:20:04 > 0:20:08but I could have happily carried on with him like that for ever.

0:20:08 > 0:20:12Which was why I'd not been completely truthful

0:20:12 > 0:20:16about how easily I could have changed him back on the long.

0:20:17 > 0:20:19But now we needed the old Renfield.

0:20:22 > 0:20:26You will open your eyes and you will see things as they really are

0:20:26 > 0:20:29and you will remember.

0:20:37 > 0:20:39Did it work?

0:20:45 > 0:20:46Oh, look.

0:20:48 > 0:20:49Cockroach.

0:20:51 > 0:20:53A cockroach!

0:21:01 > 0:21:03Oh. It's off.

0:21:03 > 0:21:05Can there be anything better

0:21:05 > 0:21:08than the crunch of a cockroach between your teeth?

0:21:08 > 0:21:10I think not.

0:21:13 > 0:21:16The old Renfield was back.

0:21:16 > 0:21:19And with his unmatched knowledge of the art of alchemy,

0:21:19 > 0:21:22he could set about making an antidote

0:21:22 > 0:21:25to cure Ingrid of her various ailments.

0:21:35 > 0:21:36It actually works.

0:21:36 > 0:21:39I should inform you, side effects may include drowsiness.

0:21:42 > 0:21:45Which brings us to Ingrid...

0:21:47 > 0:21:52..to whom deception and double-crossing come naturally.

0:21:52 > 0:21:55Look no further than her video blog.

0:21:56 > 0:21:58Sisters.

0:21:58 > 0:21:59In our battle for recognition,

0:21:59 > 0:22:02we must make full use of every weapon at our disposal.

0:22:02 > 0:22:07And one of the biggest and most powerful ones is...

0:22:07 > 0:22:09the ability to lie.

0:22:09 > 0:22:11For example, one of my greatest

0:22:11 > 0:22:14deceitful moments came when my

0:22:14 > 0:22:18brainless brother and cretinous cousin were planning

0:22:18 > 0:22:21to break the blood mirror.

0:22:21 > 0:22:22What's wrong?

0:22:22 > 0:22:25What if something's down here? Something waiting for us.

0:22:25 > 0:22:28Come on, Boris. Let's just keep moving.

0:22:28 > 0:22:31We all know what happened to bad boy Boris

0:22:31 > 0:22:33when he did eventually enter the mirror.

0:22:33 > 0:22:35But, back then, the two of them thought that

0:22:35 > 0:22:38if they could find it and smash it,

0:22:38 > 0:22:42they could get out of having to become fully-blown vampires.

0:22:42 > 0:22:44Vlad, what's happening?

0:22:44 > 0:22:47It's a vampire castle.

0:22:47 > 0:22:49It's protecting the mirror.

0:22:49 > 0:22:51Idiots! The pair of them.

0:22:53 > 0:22:55This is it.

0:22:55 > 0:22:57'Left to their own devices,

0:22:57 > 0:23:00'the whole family would have been turned into breathers.

0:23:00 > 0:23:04'They had to be stopped before they ruined everything,

0:23:04 > 0:23:06'which meant me joining forces with my pint-sized

0:23:06 > 0:23:08'pest of a cousin, Olga.'

0:23:08 > 0:23:10Shouldn't you be practising your dance routine?

0:23:10 > 0:23:12Shut up and listen, coffin breath.

0:23:12 > 0:23:17'And putting aside our, "Who's the evilest girl in the family," contest...'

0:23:17 > 0:23:19Well, I just don't like you.

0:23:19 > 0:23:22But, we have to work together against the boys.

0:23:22 > 0:23:25Sorry. Vampires don't do collaboration.

0:23:25 > 0:23:30- If you don't help me, you'll never be a vampire.- As if.

0:23:30 > 0:23:33Our zombie-brain brothers are trying to smash the blood mirror.

0:23:33 > 0:23:38- The what?- Trust me. If they succeed, we'll become mortal.

0:23:38 > 0:23:41So, what's it to be?

0:23:41 > 0:23:45Start helping or start breathing.

0:23:45 > 0:23:49'Of course, I knew boy blunder wasn't going to have the guts to do it.'

0:23:49 > 0:23:53- Well, what are you waiting for? - I don't know.

0:23:53 > 0:23:54Something doesn't feel right.

0:23:54 > 0:23:58You are so weak, Vlad.

0:23:58 > 0:24:02Everything you've ever wanted is right there in front of you.

0:24:02 > 0:24:05You just don't have the guts to take it.

0:24:08 > 0:24:11Vlad! Don't do it. You'll kill your dad!

0:24:11 > 0:24:15- No, he'll just returned to his mortal state.- Exactly.

0:24:15 > 0:24:18And he's 600 years old.

0:24:18 > 0:24:21He'll crumble to dust.

0:24:23 > 0:24:26I almost killed my own father.

0:24:26 > 0:24:30Vlad, Boris, Olga the other one! What's going on?

0:24:30 > 0:24:33Hello, Daddy. And goodbye.

0:24:33 > 0:24:35'And this was my cue...'

0:24:35 > 0:24:37No!

0:24:37 > 0:24:39'..to do something really deceitful.'

0:24:39 > 0:24:42You've turned me into a breather!

0:24:42 > 0:24:44- And I killed your dad. - Yeah, whatever.

0:24:44 > 0:24:48Slain, by my own daughter! You're so grounded.

0:24:48 > 0:24:51Guess this means I win the bet, right?

0:24:51 > 0:24:55He did this for a bet? That is evil.

0:24:55 > 0:24:57Thanks.

0:24:57 > 0:25:01I can't help noticing, I haven't disintegrated.

0:25:01 > 0:25:03Speak for yourself, I'm falling apart.

0:25:03 > 0:25:04No, you're not, Dad.

0:25:04 > 0:25:07Because you'd never miss the chance to become a vampire.

0:25:07 > 0:25:09Where's the real blood mirror, Ingrid?

0:25:09 > 0:25:12Well done, breather boy.

0:25:18 > 0:25:21Oh, yes. I thought it was bigger.

0:25:21 > 0:25:24You... you...

0:25:24 > 0:25:27Princess of darkness is the phrase you're looking for.

0:25:27 > 0:25:30So, how many levels did that work on?

0:25:30 > 0:25:34I tricked Vlad to thinking I destroyed Dad.

0:25:34 > 0:25:37I tricked Dad into thinking I destroyed Dad.

0:25:37 > 0:25:40Plus, I double-crossed Olga, and in the process proved

0:25:40 > 0:25:43I was indisputably the evilest girl in the family.

0:25:43 > 0:25:45As if that was ever in doubt.

0:25:47 > 0:25:50She's not wrong. Got to watch that one.

0:25:50 > 0:25:57Somehow, you just have to admire her. Every bone in her body is pure evil.

0:26:00 > 0:26:03"In these complicated times, I, Bertrand de Fortunesa,

0:26:03 > 0:26:07"think lies and deceit are necessary weapons in the art of survival.

0:26:09 > 0:26:12"Vlad himself claims to be a reluctant liar, but, as we've seen,

0:26:12 > 0:26:17"if this situation requires it, he'll do what it takes.

0:26:17 > 0:26:20"No-one would dare accuse Ingrid of being reluctant.

0:26:20 > 0:26:23"Double-crossing flows through her empty veins.

0:26:23 > 0:26:27"As for the Count, he must be on his guard.

0:26:27 > 0:26:30"He's created young, duplicitous fangs,

0:26:30 > 0:26:32"able to outwit and deceive him effortlessly.

0:26:32 > 0:26:38"The Count's position is precarious, and he knows it."

0:26:38 > 0:26:40"Dear Count Dracula, father of the chosen one.

0:26:40 > 0:26:45"First, may we at the Vampire's Advice Bureau commend you

0:26:45 > 0:26:48"for your brave decision to change your mind

0:26:48 > 0:26:51"and not remain anonymous in such a delicate matter."

0:26:51 > 0:26:54Not remain anonymous?

0:26:54 > 0:26:56"Although it raised a few chuckles in the office,

0:26:56 > 0:27:00"imagining how the once mighty Count Dracula might be laid low

0:27:00 > 0:27:06"by his little boy, how ironic that the all-powerful

0:27:06 > 0:27:09"Prince Of Darkness is now in fear of his own son."

0:27:09 > 0:27:12Oh, please!

0:27:12 > 0:27:15"As to helping you, yes, we're an advice bureau,

0:27:15 > 0:27:18"but we don't have a magic wand, you know?

0:27:18 > 0:27:20"You'll just have to take your chances,

0:27:20 > 0:27:25"and hope the boy doesn't destroy you.

0:27:25 > 0:27:28"PS - You're absolutely right to be worried.

0:27:28 > 0:27:32"It sounds like your days are numbered.

0:27:32 > 0:27:38"PPS - We didn't understand the bit about the annoying laugh."

0:27:38 > 0:27:42Renfield! Renfield!

0:27:42 > 0:27:48I need you to help me catch an annoying mouse.

0:27:48 > 0:27:51Oh, right you are, master. Where did I put that mousetrap?

0:27:51 > 0:27:53MOUSETRAP CLICKS

0:27:53 > 0:27:54Aaagh! You found it.

0:27:59 > 0:28:04Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd