0:00:02 > 0:00:05This programme contains some strong language.
0:00:05 > 0:00:07# Make a date, don't be late # Cos you know it's gonna be great
0:00:07 > 0:00:10# When the irrepressible Browns come to town
0:00:11 > 0:00:12# To begin
0:00:12 > 0:00:14# Just tune in
0:00:14 > 0:00:16# And you'll wear a toothy grin
0:00:16 > 0:00:20# Watching Agnes and her clan act the clown
0:00:22 > 0:00:24# Instead of feeling depressed
0:00:24 > 0:00:26# Let laughter make you feel best
0:00:26 > 0:00:31# So It's All Round To Mrs Brown's. #
0:00:32 > 0:00:35CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:00:35 > 0:00:42Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to All Round To Mrs Brown's!
0:00:54 > 0:00:57Hello!
0:00:57 > 0:01:00Hello, there. Welcome to another Saturday night at my house.
0:01:00 > 0:01:01Ha-ha.
0:01:01 > 0:01:02- AUDIENCE:- Ooh!
0:01:02 > 0:01:06- Are you there, Agnes?- Yes, will you just get yourself a cuppa?
0:01:09 > 0:01:10Tea!
0:01:12 > 0:01:14- I want tea.- I'll be with you in a second, Grandad.
0:01:14 > 0:01:16Oh, by the way, Dr Flinton called.
0:01:16 > 0:01:20He has the results of your tests. It's not good news.
0:01:20 > 0:01:21- He said you haven't long left!- Oh!
0:01:21 > 0:01:23- AUDIENCE:- Aw!
0:01:23 > 0:01:25- How long?- Ten.
0:01:25 > 0:01:27Ten what? Years? Months?
0:01:27 > 0:01:29Nine.
0:01:29 > 0:01:31- Eight, seven...- Oh!
0:01:31 > 0:01:33I'm only joking!
0:01:34 > 0:01:37He said you're as healthy as a fool.
0:01:37 > 0:01:38APPLAUSE
0:01:40 > 0:01:42What are you doing, Winnie?
0:01:42 > 0:01:46Oh, it's this crossword. I've been at it for hours.
0:01:46 > 0:01:48I'm not going to rest until it's finished.
0:01:48 > 0:01:50How many clues have you left?
0:01:50 > 0:01:5144.
0:01:51 > 0:01:53LAUGHTER.
0:01:53 > 0:01:55- How many clues is in it?- Oh!
0:01:55 > 0:01:5746.
0:01:57 > 0:01:59LAUGHTER
0:01:59 > 0:02:00Let me see.
0:02:01 > 0:02:03Ha-ha-ha!
0:02:03 > 0:02:05Winnie, even the two you have in are wrong.
0:02:05 > 0:02:06Look, "a carpenter's tool."
0:02:06 > 0:02:08You have down penis.
0:02:08 > 0:02:10- LAUGHTER - Yeah!
0:02:11 > 0:02:13And this one here.
0:02:13 > 0:02:15Winnie, "to guide a ship."
0:02:15 > 0:02:16Penis?
0:02:16 > 0:02:19Yeah, well, they're five letters, Agnes.
0:02:19 > 0:02:21Not every five letters is a penis!
0:02:21 > 0:02:22LAUGHTER
0:02:22 > 0:02:24Some of the easy ones you haven't got yet.
0:02:24 > 0:02:28Look at that one there, look. "The skin of a tree."
0:02:28 > 0:02:29Well, it's...
0:02:31 > 0:02:32- Skin?- If you say...
0:02:35 > 0:02:36Don't say what I think you're going to say.
0:02:36 > 0:02:39- I'll hit you over the head with it. - Well, I don't know, Agnes.
0:02:39 > 0:02:40Bark, Winnie, bark.
0:02:40 > 0:02:42Woof-woof!
0:02:42 > 0:02:44LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE
0:02:44 > 0:02:47I still don't know!
0:02:48 > 0:02:50Go, get out, Winnie, get out!
0:02:50 > 0:02:53- I'll see you later. - Look, I can't wait.
0:02:54 > 0:02:57So then, welcome to another evening round at my house.
0:02:57 > 0:02:59Yes, Saturday nights aren't what they used to be here,
0:02:59 > 0:03:01that's for sure. Well, it's a lot of fun.
0:03:01 > 0:03:03Dermot and Buster are still plugging away
0:03:03 > 0:03:05with their celebrity guided tour business.
0:03:05 > 0:03:07It's good to see Dermot aiming high.
0:03:07 > 0:03:10As for Buster, well, his aim is just to get through the day
0:03:10 > 0:03:12without getting arrested.
0:03:12 > 0:03:13LAUGHTER
0:03:13 > 0:03:17We've more music down in Foley's Pub, live music.
0:03:17 > 0:03:18You must come! I know.
0:03:18 > 0:03:22Apparently, it's indie night. So I love that, I love curry.
0:03:22 > 0:03:25And Cathy's showbiz blog is going really well.
0:03:25 > 0:03:28She seems to be really enjoying interviewing all those celebrities.
0:03:28 > 0:03:30I think it's rubbing off on her. Look at this.
0:03:30 > 0:03:33She's after ordering all this fitness stuff. Look at this.
0:03:35 > 0:03:38LAUGHTER
0:03:38 > 0:03:41Thigh flex. Instructions for use.
0:03:42 > 0:03:46This is complicated. Do not put it up yourself.
0:03:46 > 0:03:47LAUGHTER
0:03:50 > 0:03:52APPLAUSE
0:03:59 > 0:04:00LAUGHTER
0:04:08 > 0:04:10Ah, yes!
0:04:10 > 0:04:14Now... So... I'm excited about...
0:04:14 > 0:04:18I'm excited because tonight, Cathy says she has
0:04:18 > 0:04:22This Morning's Holly Willoughby and Paul Schofield on the show.
0:04:22 > 0:04:23Oh, yes.
0:04:23 > 0:04:25I know I can't wait to meet them.
0:04:26 > 0:04:29Even though I just called him bucking Paul! He-he-he!
0:04:29 > 0:04:31LAUGHTER
0:04:34 > 0:04:38I think Cathy's worried because she thinks I'll embarrass myself.
0:04:38 > 0:04:40I don't know what she means.
0:04:40 > 0:04:43I always make a very good first impression.
0:04:43 > 0:04:44Hello, Phillip.
0:04:46 > 0:04:49Hello. Such a pleasure to meet you.
0:04:49 > 0:04:51LAUGHTER
0:04:51 > 0:04:52Oh, Phillip, ohhhh!
0:04:54 > 0:04:56CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:04:56 > 0:04:57Hello, Mrs Brown.
0:04:59 > 0:05:00Ahem.
0:05:02 > 0:05:05Marie, you can't just barge in here like it was a public convenience.
0:05:05 > 0:05:07LAUGHTER
0:05:07 > 0:05:10Guys, come in!
0:05:10 > 0:05:12CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:05:21 > 0:05:23Hiya.
0:05:23 > 0:05:24All right?
0:05:26 > 0:05:27This is so nice.
0:05:29 > 0:05:32- It's a lovely home.- Thank you so much.
0:05:32 > 0:05:34Mrs Brown, Phillip and Holly are supposed to be getting ready
0:05:34 > 0:05:37and a wash and blow for Cathy's show. Rory's late opening up.
0:05:37 > 0:05:39Do you mind if they wait here, and I'll go and find him?
0:05:39 > 0:05:41Not at all. Get him quick. Get him quick.
0:05:41 > 0:05:44Lovely, lovely to have you, have you here.
0:05:44 > 0:05:46Would you like a cup of tea?
0:05:46 > 0:05:50Yeah, that would be lovely. Oh, you've got a crossword book here!
0:05:50 > 0:05:51LAUGHTER
0:05:56 > 0:05:58How do you take it?
0:05:58 > 0:06:00Mrs Brown, is this your crossword book? I love crosswords.
0:06:00 > 0:06:02No, no, no.
0:06:02 > 0:06:05It's my friend Winnie. She is... To be honest she's brutal at it,
0:06:05 > 0:06:07she really is, she's terrible.
0:06:09 > 0:06:10One of the clues was...
0:06:14 > 0:06:17One of the clues was "a carpenter's tool."
0:06:17 > 0:06:19- Oh, how many letters?- Five letters.
0:06:19 > 0:06:21Penis?
0:06:21 > 0:06:23LAUGHTER
0:06:23 > 0:06:26CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:06:31 > 0:06:34Oh, it's lovely to... Ah. I can't believe you're here.
0:06:34 > 0:06:36- I can't believe WE'RE here. - I watch you every morning.- Do you?
0:06:36 > 0:06:38- Every morning.- Do you?
0:06:38 > 0:06:41- And I love the way you always come on full of spunk.- Oh!
0:06:41 > 0:06:43LAUGHTER
0:06:43 > 0:06:45Thank you.
0:06:48 > 0:06:51Phillip, I'm not allowed to jump in on the talk show,
0:06:51 > 0:06:54but there's one or two questions I'd like ask you.
0:06:54 > 0:06:56LAUGHTER
0:06:56 > 0:06:58Does the carpet match the curtain?
0:06:58 > 0:07:01LAUGHTER
0:07:05 > 0:07:07Would you like the honest answer?
0:07:07 > 0:07:10Look at me and throw it to me!
0:07:10 > 0:07:12See, I know it's your birthday.
0:07:12 > 0:07:14# Happy birthday to you. #
0:07:15 > 0:07:17- I got you a present.- Did you?- Yes.
0:07:19 > 0:07:21LAUGHTER
0:07:25 > 0:07:28- What have you got? What have you got?- It's called Just For Men.
0:07:28 > 0:07:30LAUGHTER
0:07:30 > 0:07:32- Oh.- Ah. Full coverage.- Yes.
0:07:34 > 0:07:35LAUGHTER
0:07:37 > 0:07:39Start at the top.
0:07:39 > 0:07:41- Yes, and work my way down. - If you start at the bottom,
0:07:41 > 0:07:43it gets very weird when you get to the top.
0:07:43 > 0:07:45You can't not be a Silver Fox, though, any more. It has to be...
0:07:45 > 0:07:49- You have to stay silver. - It's called Arctic Blonde.
0:07:49 > 0:07:50Arctic Blonde! And you must get...
0:07:50 > 0:07:52The two of yous get it, do you?
0:07:52 > 0:07:54LAUGHTER
0:07:54 > 0:07:57- Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Mine's out of a bottle.- No, you can see that.
0:07:57 > 0:07:59- The big stripe down the middle. - I know!
0:07:59 > 0:08:01You are so right. It needs doing!
0:08:02 > 0:08:05It looks like a landing strip.
0:08:05 > 0:08:07Pass me that box.
0:08:07 > 0:08:09Where did I hear that before?
0:08:09 > 0:08:10LAUGHTER
0:08:10 > 0:08:11- Holly.- Yes?
0:08:11 > 0:08:14You have to be the most successful person in television
0:08:14 > 0:08:16because I saw you two picking up ANOTHER NTA Award.
0:08:16 > 0:08:19- Oh, we are very lucky. - CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:08:19 > 0:08:21Very blessed to work with each other
0:08:21 > 0:08:23and to be able to work on This Morning.
0:08:23 > 0:08:26You've room for it on your mantelpiece, have you?
0:08:26 > 0:08:29CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:08:29 > 0:08:30Hello, son. Hello.
0:08:32 > 0:08:35I am so sorry, Holly. How are you, Phillip? I was late opening up.
0:08:35 > 0:08:39He was. He was 25 before he told me he was a friend of Dorothy's.
0:08:39 > 0:08:41LAUGHTER
0:08:43 > 0:08:47Now, Rory, you'd better go and get made up. Right, come on.
0:08:47 > 0:08:48I'll see you at the talk show.
0:08:48 > 0:08:50Phillip, it was lovely to meet you, lovely to meet you.
0:08:50 > 0:08:52Thank you so much.
0:08:52 > 0:08:55CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:09:11 > 0:09:12Jesus!
0:09:14 > 0:09:15Oh, that's better.
0:09:16 > 0:09:19CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:09:22 > 0:09:23Right.
0:09:23 > 0:09:26Well, you know, the best part of this show for me
0:09:26 > 0:09:28has been the fact that not only did I get to meet lovely people
0:09:28 > 0:09:30like Holly and Phillip,
0:09:30 > 0:09:32but I get to meet lots of people like you, the audience.
0:09:32 > 0:09:34You've been fantastic.
0:09:34 > 0:09:36Let's see if we have anybody interesting in tonight.
0:09:36 > 0:09:39CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:09:42 > 0:09:44Elizabeth Connelly. Where's Elizabeth?
0:09:44 > 0:09:46Elizabeth, this is really interesting.
0:09:46 > 0:09:48It says here that you are a psychic,
0:09:48 > 0:09:50and it says that you can read people's jewellery.
0:09:50 > 0:09:51I can.
0:09:51 > 0:09:54There we are. I'm coming up. I want you to touch my ring.
0:09:54 > 0:09:55LAUGHTER
0:10:01 > 0:10:04- Now, do I need to take it off? - Please, yes.
0:10:04 > 0:10:07Do you know, I've never taken this ring off, never in my life.
0:10:07 > 0:10:09Not even when Redser died.
0:10:11 > 0:10:13If I don't get this back...
0:10:13 > 0:10:15LAUGHTER
0:10:15 > 0:10:17I will find you. I will kill you.
0:10:17 > 0:10:19You'll not find me cos I'm psychic.
0:10:21 > 0:10:22You're not bucking invisible.
0:10:22 > 0:10:24LAUGHTER
0:10:25 > 0:10:28Right, honey, you've got a lot of people round about you.
0:10:28 > 0:10:31LAUGHTER
0:10:32 > 0:10:34Jesus, you're amazing!
0:10:35 > 0:10:37Go on, tell me more!
0:10:39 > 0:10:41You've got back problems.
0:10:41 > 0:10:44I'm suffering from sciatica at the moment, I am, yes. You're right.
0:10:44 > 0:10:46But you've had a hard life.
0:10:46 > 0:10:49SHE COUGHS
0:10:50 > 0:10:53Can I tell you, it's not getting any fucking better?
0:10:55 > 0:10:58- Chest problems.- Well, I have now!
0:10:59 > 0:11:01Coughing into my mouth, cough, cough.
0:11:03 > 0:11:05Well, what I would say is good luck to you
0:11:05 > 0:11:07in the rest of your life and your career.
0:11:07 > 0:11:10That was really, really... Thank you so much.
0:11:10 > 0:11:11Right, Honey Bunny, right?
0:11:11 > 0:11:13APPLAUSE
0:11:18 > 0:11:19Now, she was able to tell all about me
0:11:19 > 0:11:21by just looking at the family jewels.
0:11:21 > 0:11:23LAUGHTER
0:11:23 > 0:11:26- Katie Crichton, where's Katie? Hello, Katie!- Hi.
0:11:26 > 0:11:29- Is that himself beside you?- Yes. - Yeah.- What's his name?- Paul.
0:11:29 > 0:11:32Hello, Paul. How are you? Congratulations to you.
0:11:32 > 0:11:34- You're getting married this summer? - We are, yes.- Excellent.
0:11:34 > 0:11:37APPLAUSE
0:11:38 > 0:11:41And you said you have almost everything sorted?
0:11:41 > 0:11:46- Yeah, I've got my dress.- Oh, lovely, what colour is it?
0:11:46 > 0:11:47Ivory.
0:11:47 > 0:11:49So you're pregnant, are you?
0:11:49 > 0:11:51LAUGHTER
0:11:51 > 0:11:53What are the bridesmaids wearing?
0:11:53 > 0:11:56- They are wearing lovely turquoise dresses.- Aw!
0:11:56 > 0:11:59So I've just got a few things left to get.
0:11:59 > 0:12:00Like what?
0:12:00 > 0:12:03Well, I've still got to get my something old and something new
0:12:03 > 0:12:05and something borrowed and something blue.
0:12:06 > 0:12:08Come here down to me. Come here.
0:12:08 > 0:12:11APPLAUSE
0:12:15 > 0:12:18Now, that's an old purse of mine. All right? You can have that.
0:12:18 > 0:12:21- And I put 20p in it for luck.- Aw!
0:12:21 > 0:12:23You can have that.
0:12:23 > 0:12:25APPLAUSE
0:12:28 > 0:12:30That's something new.
0:12:30 > 0:12:33It's actually... It looks like a scarf but I wore it as a garter.
0:12:33 > 0:12:35LAUGHTER
0:12:35 > 0:12:37Thank you.
0:12:39 > 0:12:42Something borrowed. Something borrowed. I've got nothing...
0:12:42 > 0:12:44I wouldn't trust you to bucking bring it back.
0:12:44 > 0:12:46LAUGHTER
0:12:46 > 0:12:48I can give you something borrowed and something blue at the same time.
0:12:48 > 0:12:50Hold on.
0:13:00 > 0:13:03TEARING SOUND
0:13:03 > 0:13:05LAUGHTER
0:13:08 > 0:13:11I have to tell you, if you don't bring that back, it doesn't matter.
0:13:11 > 0:13:12LAUGHTER
0:13:12 > 0:13:14You can borrow them and keep 'em. Off you go.
0:13:14 > 0:13:16Give her a round of applause.
0:13:16 > 0:13:18CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:13:21 > 0:13:24- Hello, Cathy.- Hiya, Mammy.
0:13:24 > 0:13:28CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:13:28 > 0:13:31Mammy, I'm a bit nervous about the show tonight.
0:13:31 > 0:13:33It's going to be a packed sofa with Holly Willoughby
0:13:33 > 0:13:35and Phillip Schofield.
0:13:35 > 0:13:38- You'll love them. They seem really, really nice.- What?!
0:13:38 > 0:13:41- You were speaking to them already? - Well, yes, I mean,
0:13:41 > 0:13:44cheeky silver devil, he couldn't keep his eyes off me.
0:13:44 > 0:13:45LAUGHTER
0:13:45 > 0:13:50Mammy, tell me you didn't say or do anything embarrassing, did you?
0:13:50 > 0:13:51You promised.
0:13:51 > 0:13:53Of course I didn't.
0:13:53 > 0:13:55And I don't think they noticed, anyway.
0:13:55 > 0:13:57LAUGHTER
0:13:57 > 0:13:59- I don't think I want to know.- OK.
0:13:59 > 0:14:01Not only them, though, Mammy,
0:14:01 > 0:14:03- Lulu's going to be here too! - Lulu?
0:14:03 > 0:14:06CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:14:06 > 0:14:11- No way!- Yes. I love her. I'm such a big fan.- Oh, she's wonderful.
0:14:11 > 0:14:12The voice. I love the '60s.
0:14:13 > 0:14:16All that free love!
0:14:16 > 0:14:18It wasn't free for your father, but it was cheap!
0:14:18 > 0:14:19LAUGHTER
0:14:19 > 0:14:21I don't want to hear any more, Mammy,
0:14:21 > 0:14:23I'll finish preparing upstairs.
0:14:23 > 0:14:26- Ha-ha-ha.- See you later. - See you later, love.
0:14:26 > 0:14:29CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:14:30 > 0:14:34She hasn't said what Chef Aly is cooking for the dinner tonight.
0:14:34 > 0:14:36I wonder what it is.
0:14:36 > 0:14:39CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:14:39 > 0:14:40Hello, Chef Aly.
0:14:40 > 0:14:43- Hello, Mrs Brown.- Reggae!
0:14:43 > 0:14:47MUSIC: Mr Boombastic By Shaggy
0:14:53 > 0:14:56MUSIC STOPS
0:14:56 > 0:14:58- Let's get down to business.- OK.
0:14:59 > 0:15:01So, Aly, what are you cooking tonight?
0:15:01 > 0:15:05- I'm making chicken Kiev for Holly. It's her favourite meal.- Oh, lovely.
0:15:05 > 0:15:08Plus I'm making cream Cornish tea for Phil.
0:15:08 > 0:15:10Cornish cream tea for Phillip? Very nice.
0:15:10 > 0:15:12I think we have a picture of it
0:15:12 > 0:15:14to show you what it's going to look like when it's done.
0:15:14 > 0:15:16- AUDIENCE:- Oooooh!
0:15:19 > 0:15:20Reggae!
0:15:20 > 0:15:23MUSIC: Mr Boombastic by Shaggy
0:15:31 > 0:15:33MUSIC STOPS
0:15:33 > 0:15:36So... Damn it! Shit!
0:15:36 > 0:15:38LAUGHTER
0:15:38 > 0:15:40So I'd better let you get started, then.
0:15:40 > 0:15:42Can't wait to try it out later.
0:15:42 > 0:15:45I have to go. I have to meet Winnie down in the pub.
0:15:45 > 0:15:48- Ladies and gentlemen, Chef Aly. - Thank you.
0:15:48 > 0:15:51CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:15:59 > 0:16:02- Hello, boys.- Hiya, Mam. - Hello, Mrs Brown.- Hello...
0:16:02 > 0:16:04- Buster, isn't it?- Yeah.
0:16:04 > 0:16:06LAUGHTER
0:16:06 > 0:16:07You're looking very pleased with yourselves.
0:16:07 > 0:16:11- This celebrity guided tour business, it's off to a flying start.- Really?
0:16:11 > 0:16:14We did an open-top-bus tour in London. It was a huge success.
0:16:14 > 0:16:17Yeah, only the celebrity we booked wasn't a real celebrity.
0:16:17 > 0:16:20- It was just a lookalike. - Now, Buster.
0:16:20 > 0:16:24For the last time, it WAS really him.
0:16:25 > 0:16:27All right.
0:16:27 > 0:16:29- MOUTHS:- It wasn't him!
0:16:31 > 0:16:32So tell me what happened.
0:16:32 > 0:16:35- It's a long story.- I'm great at long stories.
0:16:35 > 0:16:37Stand out here and we'll do the wobble.
0:16:37 > 0:16:39LAUGHTER
0:16:39 > 0:16:41Ready and wobbling.
0:16:49 > 0:16:51And you definitely booked a proper local celebrity
0:16:51 > 0:16:52for the Celebrity Bus Tour?
0:16:52 > 0:16:54- We've got a lot riding on this bus back here.- I did.
0:16:54 > 0:16:56Just like you told me to.
0:16:56 > 0:17:00A genuine London celebrity for a London bus tour like no other.
0:17:00 > 0:17:03Plus, I got a map of London just so that we don't get lost.
0:17:03 > 0:17:06It looks easy enough, Dermot. Just round the square and we're finished.
0:17:06 > 0:17:07Shut up, Buster.
0:17:07 > 0:17:10Right, where's the celebrity? We've got customers waiting.
0:17:10 > 0:17:12- SHOUTS:- Get on the bus!
0:17:12 > 0:17:14LAUGHTER
0:17:14 > 0:17:16He said he'd be here at three o'clock.
0:17:16 > 0:17:18Ah! Here he is now.
0:17:18 > 0:17:24BIG BEN CHIMES
0:17:27 > 0:17:29Who's that?
0:17:29 > 0:17:32EASTENDERs THEME TUNE STARTS
0:17:32 > 0:17:36- Ian Beale?- No, Adam Woodyatt, actually.
0:17:36 > 0:17:37Oh, dammit, I'm so sorry.
0:17:37 > 0:17:41They promised me it was going to be the real Ian Beale from EastEnders.
0:17:41 > 0:17:44But Adam here is a pretty good lookalike.
0:17:44 > 0:17:49- We'll get away with it.- You have to. Welcome to the team.- Right.
0:17:49 > 0:17:52- If anybody asks, you're Ian Beale, all right?- All right.
0:17:52 > 0:17:54Are you ready for today?
0:17:54 > 0:17:55Yeah, I'm a little bit nervous
0:17:55 > 0:17:57because I don't know what's going to happen,
0:17:57 > 0:18:00and looking at you two, it worries me even more.
0:18:00 > 0:18:01But today, you work for us.
0:18:01 > 0:18:03And we are going to give these people
0:18:03 > 0:18:04the guided tour of their lives.
0:18:04 > 0:18:06Terrific Trendy Tours Of London Town
0:18:06 > 0:18:09Totally Tailored to the Terrific Tourists.
0:18:09 > 0:18:11Tiptop and Totally Terrific.
0:18:11 > 0:18:12Very good, Dermot.
0:18:12 > 0:18:14Let's go and get our uniforms on. He-he!
0:18:14 > 0:18:17MUSIC: Rule Britannia
0:18:17 > 0:18:19SHOUTS: Hey! Get back in the bus!
0:18:19 > 0:18:21LAUGHTER
0:18:24 > 0:18:28- MUSIC:- Zorba The Greek
0:18:34 > 0:18:37- What are we supposed to be? - Beefeaters.
0:18:37 > 0:18:39You're not a vegetarian, are you?
0:18:39 > 0:18:43Hey, hey, hey! We need to do the warm-up routine. It's tradition.
0:18:43 > 0:18:49- BOTH:- Ohhhhhh, oojy-baba, oojy-baba, oojy-baba, oojy baba...
0:18:49 > 0:18:52- Let's...- Get...- Ready...- To...
0:18:52 > 0:18:53Rumble?
0:18:55 > 0:18:56Make money, Adam, make money.
0:18:58 > 0:19:00Good afternoon. And welcome to
0:19:00 > 0:19:03the D and B Celebrity Bus Tour of London.
0:19:03 > 0:19:04Innit, bruv?
0:19:04 > 0:19:06- PUBLIC:- Yay!
0:19:06 > 0:19:09We have a great tour planned for you all today.
0:19:09 > 0:19:14And to give you all the very best local k-no... Knowledge.
0:19:14 > 0:19:17Let me introduce London's most famous celebrity, Ian Beale.
0:19:22 > 0:19:25- Right then, people. Let's go see London!- Let's go!
0:19:26 > 0:19:27Driver!
0:19:30 > 0:19:34OK, say goodbye to Big Ben, everybody! Cheerio!
0:19:34 > 0:19:37BIG BEN CHIMES
0:19:37 > 0:19:39Look, ladies and gentlemen, with the tickets you have purchased
0:19:39 > 0:19:44for this tour, you can hop on and hop off at any point.
0:19:44 > 0:19:47However, you should know, we will not be stopping.
0:19:47 > 0:19:48LAUGHTER
0:19:48 > 0:19:52MUSIC: London Calling by The Clash
0:19:52 > 0:19:55On your left-hand side, we come to Downing Street.
0:19:57 > 0:20:00Home of the Prime Minister, Theresa May.
0:20:00 > 0:20:01TRESemme? Like the shampoo?
0:20:02 > 0:20:05LAUGHTER
0:20:05 > 0:20:09MUSIC: Going Underground by The Jam
0:20:09 > 0:20:11And now, ladies and gentlemen,
0:20:11 > 0:20:15this is one of the highlights of the tour, Trafalgar Square.
0:20:15 > 0:20:16- PUBLIC:- Oooh!
0:20:16 > 0:20:19Now to give us some facts on Trafalgar Square
0:20:19 > 0:20:21and Nelson is Ian Beale.
0:20:24 > 0:20:26Nelson was imprisoned on Robben Island in South Africa
0:20:26 > 0:20:31over 27 years, before later being released.
0:20:32 > 0:20:37Sadly, Nelson died on December 5th, 2013, aged 95,
0:20:37 > 0:20:41and never got the chance to see this beautiful statue...
0:20:41 > 0:20:42which is good,
0:20:42 > 0:20:45because it looks nothing like his picture on Wikipedia.
0:20:45 > 0:20:47LAUGHTER
0:20:48 > 0:20:52MUSIC: Free Nelson Mandela
0:20:56 > 0:21:00- And we are now in London's famous West End.- Oh, look, Dermot,
0:21:00 > 0:21:01there's The Lion King.
0:21:03 > 0:21:07- BOTH:- # It's the circle of life. #
0:21:07 > 0:21:11- BOTH:- # A-wim-a-weh, a-wim-a-weh, a-wim-a-weh, a-wim-a-weh
0:21:11 > 0:21:15# Oooh, oooh, oooh-oooh, oooh-oooh, oooh-oooh, oooh... #
0:21:15 > 0:21:17MUSIC: The Lion Sleeps Tonight by Tight Fit
0:21:17 > 0:21:19There is PC Plod!
0:21:26 > 0:21:29Unfortunately, that's the end of the tour, ladies and gentlemen,
0:21:29 > 0:21:30we hope you had a great trip.
0:21:30 > 0:21:32- PUBLIC:- Aw.
0:21:32 > 0:21:35If you did, please show your appreciation with a tip.
0:21:37 > 0:21:39If you had a good trip, give a good tip!
0:21:40 > 0:21:44If we did our job, give us a few bob!
0:21:44 > 0:21:46- If you don't fill the bucket... - BLEEP- it.
0:21:46 > 0:21:48LAUGHTER
0:21:48 > 0:21:51Let's go, quick, quick. We've another tour in ten minutes.
0:21:51 > 0:21:53Thank you. Moving on.
0:21:53 > 0:21:57MUSIC: Land Of Hope And Glory
0:21:57 > 0:21:58Well done, today, boys, we done great.
0:21:58 > 0:22:02Right, let's divvy up the tips. He-he-he!
0:22:02 > 0:22:05- Is this how I'm getting paid? - It sure is.
0:22:05 > 0:22:07£65 in tips.
0:22:07 > 0:22:09So 40% goes to me.
0:22:11 > 0:22:15- 20% to you, Buster.- Thank you. - And you done great, 20% for you.
0:22:16 > 0:22:18Leaving 20% for overheads.
0:22:20 > 0:22:22But you did have sandwiches.
0:22:24 > 0:22:26Your make-up wasn't cheap.
0:22:27 > 0:22:29And you broke that woman's camera.
0:22:31 > 0:22:35- CRIES:- He's got nothing left!
0:22:35 > 0:22:38THEY LAUGH
0:22:41 > 0:22:43He's a lovely laddie. Who is he?
0:22:53 > 0:22:56Well, that sounds like a lot of... I'm getting dizzy.
0:22:57 > 0:23:00- That sounds like a lot of fun. Well done, Dermot.- Thanks, Ma.
0:23:00 > 0:23:04You know, I went on a bus tour, open-top, once. Yeah.
0:23:04 > 0:23:06You should have seen the looks everybody gave me.
0:23:06 > 0:23:08I had to pull my knickers up to cover my nipples.
0:23:08 > 0:23:10LAUGHTER
0:23:13 > 0:23:15All right, see you, Dermot.
0:23:15 > 0:23:16Goodbye.
0:23:18 > 0:23:20LAUGHTER
0:23:23 > 0:23:24Oh!
0:23:30 > 0:23:32Hello, Winnie. Before I sit down,
0:23:32 > 0:23:35- it's not a bucking crossword, is it? - No.
0:23:35 > 0:23:38I'm just reading about one of those celebrities, Lady Googoo.
0:23:38 > 0:23:40Gaga.
0:23:40 > 0:23:42- Googoo.- Gaga.- Googoo.- Gaga.
0:23:42 > 0:23:44Who's a pretty baby?
0:23:44 > 0:23:46SHE LAUGHS
0:23:46 > 0:23:50- Apparently, she has a 24-carat necklace.- Phoo!- Yeah.
0:23:51 > 0:23:53Is that because she's vegetarian?
0:23:53 > 0:23:55LAUGHTER
0:23:56 > 0:23:59- Oh, God, what time is it?- Why? - I'm going to miss Cathy's show.
0:23:59 > 0:24:00I don't want to miss the show.
0:24:00 > 0:24:02- Sorry, Winnie, you can finish off my drink.- See you later.
0:24:02 > 0:24:05CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:24:05 > 0:24:09All the guests are washed and blown and ready for you, Cathy.
0:24:09 > 0:24:11Aw, thanks, Rory.
0:24:11 > 0:24:14It looks like Mammy's going to miss the show.
0:24:14 > 0:24:18- THEY LAUGH - Yes!
0:24:18 > 0:24:20- See you!- See you later.
0:24:20 > 0:24:26And we're on in five, four, three, two, one, cue, Cathy.
0:24:26 > 0:24:27# Lights a-glow
0:24:27 > 0:24:29# Here we go
0:24:29 > 0:24:31# The Cathy Brown Show. #
0:24:31 > 0:24:34Hello, there, again, and welcome to the Cathy Brown Show
0:24:34 > 0:24:38with me, Cathy Brown, giving you all the latest showbiz gossip.
0:24:38 > 0:24:40Wait, wait!
0:24:40 > 0:24:41Whoa!
0:24:41 > 0:24:42CRASH!
0:24:42 > 0:24:44- Sorry, Aly!- Chef Aly!
0:24:44 > 0:24:47- Wait, wait, I'm not missing this one.- Oh, for fucksake!
0:24:47 > 0:24:49It's my chair.
0:24:49 > 0:24:52- You could try to be on time. - Well, I'm not missing this one.
0:24:52 > 0:24:55- Yes, but you could be on time.- Yes.
0:24:55 > 0:24:56LAUGHTER
0:24:56 > 0:25:01As I was saying, I'm very excited to introduce the legendary Lulu
0:25:01 > 0:25:05and the fantastic Holly Willoughby and Phillip Schofield.
0:25:05 > 0:25:08CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:25:16 > 0:25:17Hello.
0:25:20 > 0:25:23- Nice to see you.- Thank you very much.
0:25:23 > 0:25:24Oh, wow!
0:25:26 > 0:25:27- AUDIENCE:- Oooooh!
0:25:33 > 0:25:37- Buster! What the hell are you doing?- It's for Lulu.
0:25:37 > 0:25:40I want to show her my swinging '60s.
0:25:40 > 0:25:42LAUGHTER
0:25:42 > 0:25:45Buster, nobody wants to see your swinging anything!
0:25:45 > 0:25:47Get out, Buster!
0:25:47 > 0:25:49- AUDIENCE:- Awww!
0:25:49 > 0:25:51Get the lights on the way.
0:25:55 > 0:25:56Groovy, baby.
0:26:01 > 0:26:04Well, sorry about that. You are all very welcome to the show.
0:26:04 > 0:26:06- It's great to have you here. Is everyone comfortable?- Very.
0:26:06 > 0:26:10Very good. I actually brought a present here. This is for you.
0:26:10 > 0:26:13- For me?- Yeah, I thought I'd give that to you.
0:26:13 > 0:26:15- Thank you so much. - It's from Phil and myself.
0:26:19 > 0:26:21Ohhhh, lovely.
0:26:21 > 0:26:23It's a swear box.
0:26:23 > 0:26:24LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE
0:26:29 > 0:26:32- Oh, that's lovely. - This is lovely. Lulu?
0:26:35 > 0:26:37Um, I was going to send flowers tomorrow...
0:26:37 > 0:26:41- Oh, that's so kind of you. - ..if it went well.- Oh, well.
0:26:41 > 0:26:45Lulu, I have to say, you look, as always, amazing tonight.
0:26:45 > 0:26:46How do you do it?
0:26:46 > 0:26:49APPLAUSE Yes, how DO you do it?
0:26:51 > 0:26:53- Hard work.- Hard work.- Hard work.
0:26:53 > 0:26:56You could be 16, just stepping off that train from Glasgow into...
0:26:56 > 0:26:59- Ah, that's very sweet. - ..the world of rock.
0:26:59 > 0:27:01You rocked my world.
0:27:01 > 0:27:04Honestly, everybody in the world it doesn't matter,
0:27:04 > 0:27:06knows Shout, it's just the opening of it.
0:27:06 > 0:27:09I don't know if you know it at home. It goes...
0:27:09 > 0:27:13# Weeeelllllll... #
0:27:13 > 0:27:16CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:27:16 > 0:27:18- Thank you.- Something very like that.
0:27:20 > 0:27:22She's lost it a bit.
0:27:22 > 0:27:23LAUGHTER
0:27:23 > 0:27:28Mammy could learn a few style tips from you. Do you have any for her?
0:27:28 > 0:27:31LAUGHTER
0:27:31 > 0:27:34I think she's perfect just as she is.
0:27:34 > 0:27:36- AUDIENCE:- Aw.
0:27:36 > 0:27:38Thank you so much.
0:27:38 > 0:27:42I know sometimes I wear my skirts a bit short. I do.
0:27:42 > 0:27:43You can just see my ninnies.
0:27:43 > 0:27:45Whoa! Ha-ha-ha!
0:27:45 > 0:27:48I just saw then that the collars and cuffs don't match.
0:27:48 > 0:27:51THEY LAUGH
0:27:51 > 0:27:54You're right. For them to match, I'd have to shave my head.
0:27:54 > 0:27:57LAUGHTER
0:28:03 > 0:28:07- Wow, wow.- Holly and Phil, Mammy and I are big fans of This Morning.
0:28:07 > 0:28:09Huge, huge. We really are.
0:28:09 > 0:28:13But I have to say, our favourite part was the live wedding.
0:28:13 > 0:28:15- Oh, yes, that was wonderful. - It was amazing.
0:28:15 > 0:28:18- Do you plan on doing another one? - It was magical.
0:28:18 > 0:28:20For somebody to spend that most important day of your life,
0:28:20 > 0:28:22really, when you marry someone...
0:28:22 > 0:28:25- So you don't have a couple or anything in mind?- Do YOU?
0:28:25 > 0:28:29- Do you? Oh, oh.- I don't believe it!- I'm just saying.- Seriously.
0:28:29 > 0:28:31I'm just saying.
0:28:31 > 0:28:33- Not the time or the place, Mammy. - You'd be a catch for anybody...
0:28:35 > 0:28:37LAUGHTER
0:28:37 > 0:28:39I don't think I'll be on the show, Mammy, OK?
0:28:39 > 0:28:42No, you could, because we could pamper you before you came on,
0:28:42 > 0:28:46we do all sorts of things on there, we've done a vagina facial.
0:28:46 > 0:28:49LAUGHTER
0:28:49 > 0:28:52Who the hell wants a face like a fanny?
0:28:52 > 0:28:57LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE
0:29:00 > 0:29:02I think I might pass on that one, yeah.
0:29:02 > 0:29:06- Lulu, you're going on tour again in October.- I am, I am.
0:29:06 > 0:29:10I'm going actually to tour in America in a month, and then I go...
0:29:10 > 0:29:12But in this country in October, through October, November.
0:29:12 > 0:29:15- That's going to be exciting. - I live for it.
0:29:15 > 0:29:17Would you like to see a clip of Lulu in action?
0:29:17 > 0:29:18- AUDIENCE:- Yes!
0:29:19 > 0:29:24# You need somebody who can help you with your heavy load
0:29:27 > 0:29:30# Well, I've been there, baby
0:29:30 > 0:29:33# Just give me some rock and roll... #
0:29:35 > 0:29:38CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:29:40 > 0:29:43Do you have fans that follow you wherever you go, wherever you tour?
0:29:43 > 0:29:44- Yeah... - CHEERING
0:29:44 > 0:29:46Yeah, there's a few of them here.
0:29:52 > 0:29:55She's over there waving her walking stick at you.
0:29:55 > 0:29:57APPLAUSE
0:29:59 > 0:30:02- Yes. I want to say that your dress is absolutely beautiful.- Thank you.
0:30:02 > 0:30:07- As is yours.- Oh, no. You can see my panty line, you can't see yours.
0:30:07 > 0:30:10That's because my pants go from there to there.
0:30:10 > 0:30:12- Spanx.- I don't think they do.
0:30:15 > 0:30:17WHOOPING
0:30:17 > 0:30:19APPLAUSE
0:30:19 > 0:30:22- I was trying to compliment you on your figure.- Thank you, thank you.
0:30:22 > 0:30:25- Mammy...- Oh, you've got the same!
0:30:25 > 0:30:27- The same thing.- Matching pants.
0:30:27 > 0:30:29Lulu, show us your knickers.
0:30:32 > 0:30:35- I love having my mammy here with me.- You liar!- I do.
0:30:35 > 0:30:36But, as you know,
0:30:36 > 0:30:40we always welcome one of our guests' own mammies onto the show.
0:30:40 > 0:30:43But this week we've got twice the fun.
0:30:43 > 0:30:48So, please welcome Holly's mum, Lynne, and Phil's mother, Pat.
0:30:48 > 0:30:51CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:31:07 > 0:31:10- Just sit yourself there.- Thank you very much.- Take up a bit of couch.
0:31:10 > 0:31:13Buster... Thank you.
0:31:14 > 0:31:18MUSIC: Theme from Austin Powers
0:31:18 > 0:31:21APPLAUSE
0:31:22 > 0:31:24Well, it's great to have you both on the show.
0:31:24 > 0:31:27- Thank you very much for coming to visit us.- Oh, thank you.
0:31:27 > 0:31:30And it feels a bit like the in-laws meeting each other for the
0:31:30 > 0:31:32first time.
0:31:32 > 0:31:36- Do you guys know each other well? - Just odd times we've met, yes.
0:31:36 > 0:31:39Did you ever imagine back in the day that Holly and Phil would be
0:31:39 > 0:31:42such a huge part of all of our mornings?
0:31:42 > 0:31:46Well, as far as Phillip was concerned, yes. Because...
0:31:48 > 0:31:50Oh, he's had it. Oh, he's had it.
0:31:50 > 0:31:53Because from being knee-high to a grasshopper,
0:31:53 > 0:31:56he used to walk about the house with a tea trolley.
0:31:56 > 0:32:00And he used... He used to interview everybody.
0:32:02 > 0:32:05- So he hasn't changed?- No.
0:32:05 > 0:32:08I did used to put a cardboard box on the top of the tea trolley,
0:32:08 > 0:32:11- it wasn't just a tea trolley. It was a proper camera.- Oh.
0:32:12 > 0:32:15The cardboard box on the top.
0:32:15 > 0:32:18- You were going for a tracking shot, a tracking shot?- Yes.- Lynne, what about Holly?
0:32:18 > 0:32:21Did she show any signs when she was younger that she was going to
0:32:21 > 0:32:24- turn out to be...- Not really.
0:32:24 > 0:32:27They were always putting on plays and things, so dressing up.
0:32:27 > 0:32:32- And would she be the star of the play?- Yes.- Yes. This one's the same.- Was I?
0:32:32 > 0:32:35My sister's going to be watching at home, going, "I was the star!"
0:32:35 > 0:32:38Lynne, Holly wrote a book about parenting.
0:32:38 > 0:32:42- Did she learn all her parenting skills from you?- I don't think so.
0:32:42 > 0:32:44That's not true. That's not true.
0:32:44 > 0:32:47No, I learned an awful lot from my mum. But the thing was,
0:32:47 > 0:32:50Mum didn't really remember anything about being pregnant with us.
0:32:50 > 0:32:54When I was writing the book, one of the things I wanted to do was write it all down and
0:32:54 > 0:32:58- document it at the time, because you forget these things so quickly.- Yes.
0:32:58 > 0:33:03- A lot going on.- I never, ever forget it, no. No, I never forget it.
0:33:03 > 0:33:05She was 7lbs 19oz.
0:33:07 > 0:33:08I used to wake her up in the middle of the night,
0:33:08 > 0:33:11"You destroyed by fanny, you did!"
0:33:11 > 0:33:13APPLAUSE
0:33:16 > 0:33:19I never forget it. Never.
0:33:19 > 0:33:24- We have a picture of Lulu and her mammy.- Oh.- Aw!- Aw!
0:33:24 > 0:33:26Which one is you?
0:33:26 > 0:33:27APPLAUSE
0:33:27 > 0:33:30- And that's Billy. - That's your brother, Billy?
0:33:30 > 0:33:32Heading for the air raid shelter.
0:33:38 > 0:33:43Lynne and Pat, we have to ask you, how come these two always
0:33:43 > 0:33:47just disintegrate into fits of giggles when they're on the show?
0:33:47 > 0:33:50- Are you a giggly person? - No, I'm more serious, I think.
0:33:50 > 0:33:54No, you're not! You're not.
0:33:54 > 0:33:58We have a particular clip of you two giggling after you made
0:33:58 > 0:34:02- a funny noise?- Oh, yeah, I know. Never made it since.
0:34:02 > 0:34:05- You don't know where it came from? - I don't know.- Will we have a look?
0:34:05 > 0:34:08- AUDIENCE:- Yes!- Yes. - Well, the best...
0:34:08 > 0:34:10- Are you all right?- I'm fine. Sorry.
0:34:10 > 0:34:13Got a bit...of sandy clam stuck in your throat?
0:34:13 > 0:34:15THEY LAUGH
0:34:20 > 0:34:22HOLLY MAKES STRANGE NOISE
0:34:22 > 0:34:23THEY LAUGH
0:34:23 > 0:34:25What the hell was...?!
0:34:25 > 0:34:28What was that noise?! You never...
0:34:28 > 0:34:30THEY LAUGH
0:34:30 > 0:34:31APPLAUSE
0:34:36 > 0:34:41- Were they giggly as children? - No. No.- Holly was very giggly.
0:34:41 > 0:34:45I think that I share my mother's filthy sense of humour.
0:34:45 > 0:34:48- AUDIENCE:- Oooo!- Ah!
0:34:48 > 0:34:49Ah!
0:34:53 > 0:34:56APPLAUSE
0:34:56 > 0:34:59The thing that started that all off in the first place was
0:34:59 > 0:35:03a cookery item where we were cooking clams.
0:35:03 > 0:35:06And the chef was cleaning them out.
0:35:06 > 0:35:11- And you'd said, "How do you get the sand out on the clams?" - Because nobody like...
0:35:11 > 0:35:13"No-one likes a sandy clam."
0:35:16 > 0:35:19Which is true. Which is true.
0:35:19 > 0:35:22Hose down your clam and then you don't get any sand in it.
0:35:22 > 0:35:24- Well, speaking...- Give me the fucking box.
0:35:27 > 0:35:29We're going to need a bigger box.
0:35:31 > 0:35:34Where did I hear that before? Oh, yes.
0:35:34 > 0:35:36Oh, Mammy, speaking of food,
0:35:36 > 0:35:38why don't you go and see how chef Aly is doing with the food?
0:35:38 > 0:35:41Lynne, Pat, would you like to come in and join me in the kitchen?
0:35:41 > 0:35:44- We'll go and meet chef Aly.- Lovely. - We'll have a one-to-one in the kitchen.
0:35:44 > 0:35:46APPLAUSE
0:35:46 > 0:35:48Thank you. Thank you very much.
0:35:52 > 0:35:58This side, Lynne. Come down here. Look at this.
0:35:58 > 0:35:59SHE GIGGLES
0:35:59 > 0:36:02- Who's this? - Holly and Kelly, her sister.
0:36:02 > 0:36:06- They're just always cuddly, always together.- And were they very close sisters?
0:36:06 > 0:36:08- Very close.- Which was the bossy one?
0:36:08 > 0:36:12Holly always beat Kelly, even though she was the oldest.
0:36:12 > 0:36:14So if they'd have a tumble...
0:36:14 > 0:36:17- She was the strong one. - Look at that. Look at this.
0:36:17 > 0:36:19- AUDIENCE:- Aw!- I know, aren't they absolutely...?
0:36:19 > 0:36:22Hard to believe they turned out to be the rats that they are.
0:36:25 > 0:36:27Who's this? You wouldn't see a child dressed like that now.
0:36:27 > 0:36:30You're dying to see it, aren't you? You're dying to see it.
0:36:30 > 0:36:33It's lovely, it really is lovely. Look at that.
0:36:33 > 0:36:35- AUDIENCE:- Aw!
0:36:35 > 0:36:37APPLAUSE
0:36:40 > 0:36:43Phillip Schofield on the beach with his little dickie.
0:36:44 > 0:36:46Just come over here and see what Aly is making for us.
0:36:46 > 0:36:51Now, I know, Lynne, Holly's favourite dish is her chicken Kiev.
0:36:51 > 0:36:54- She likes chicken Kiev.- She loves it.- Aly is doing that for you.
0:36:54 > 0:36:56- Are you a good cook yourself? - Wonderful cook.
0:36:56 > 0:36:59Hold on a second, did you just laugh?
0:36:59 > 0:37:02- Holly Willoughby, did you just laugh?- Can I just say something?
0:37:02 > 0:37:05I don't think my mum will mind me saying - until I left home,
0:37:05 > 0:37:10I never had a roast chicken that wasn't cooked in the microwave.
0:37:10 > 0:37:11My mum...
0:37:11 > 0:37:14And I'm not saying it was a bad thing, it was really delicious,
0:37:14 > 0:37:17but she would open the door, slam it in, shut the door...
0:37:17 > 0:37:21How long would you put it on? We used to call it "chicken ding".
0:37:21 > 0:37:23- It was different times.- Yes.
0:37:23 > 0:37:26We've been married 40 years, and when I first got married,
0:37:26 > 0:37:29microwaves came out, and that's the way you cooked!
0:37:29 > 0:37:31Absolutely.
0:37:31 > 0:37:33- How about you, do you cook at all?- Not now.
0:37:33 > 0:37:35I used to. I used to have a guesthouse.
0:37:35 > 0:37:37We used to take 26 visitors.
0:37:37 > 0:37:39- Did Phillip grow up in that guesthouse life?- Yes, he did.
0:37:39 > 0:37:42Do you think that's probably why he's so good with people?
0:37:42 > 0:37:46Probably, because he used to go around with a pretend microphone,
0:37:46 > 0:37:50and he'd say, "I'm just giving an interview with these visitors."
0:37:53 > 0:37:56- So he was destined to be where he is.- Yeah.
0:37:56 > 0:37:59And you reckon Holly had none of that in her whatsoever?
0:37:59 > 0:38:01No, she was quite happy under the table with a bit of cotton,
0:38:01 > 0:38:03in her own world.
0:38:03 > 0:38:05LAUGHTER
0:38:06 > 0:38:09A little dreamer.
0:38:09 > 0:38:12But she used to make brilliant bird boxes.
0:38:14 > 0:38:16- She made bird boxes?!- Yeah.
0:38:17 > 0:38:21It was a bit freaky when she made this eight-foot cross,
0:38:21 > 0:38:23and made a stake...
0:38:23 > 0:38:24LAUGHTER
0:38:26 > 0:38:29- LAUGHING:- She...- She didn't ask you to put your hands out
0:38:29 > 0:38:31like that, did she?
0:38:31 > 0:38:34She stapled all these rhododendrons to the cross,
0:38:34 > 0:38:37and then she tapped on the window, and we had to think,
0:38:37 > 0:38:38"Oh, this is a bit weird",
0:38:38 > 0:38:42so we had to drag it up the street to the church.
0:38:42 > 0:38:44It was Easter.
0:38:44 > 0:38:47CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:38:47 > 0:38:48Holly Willoughby!
0:38:50 > 0:38:52And you thought YOU were weird.
0:38:52 > 0:38:54You turned your mother into Jesus Christ.
0:38:54 > 0:38:56Dragging the cross through the village.
0:38:56 > 0:38:59OK, so that's the chicken kiev, what are you doing for Phillip?
0:38:59 > 0:39:02We're not doing microwave here.
0:39:02 > 0:39:06We're doing vegetables, nice carrots, beetroots,
0:39:06 > 0:39:09potato and stuff for the chicken kiev,
0:39:09 > 0:39:13and we're doing also something nice from Cornwall.
0:39:13 > 0:39:17- Absolutely beautiful.- Also something for Lulu.- Oh, a surprise for Lulu?
0:39:17 > 0:39:20- Yeah, she's dairy. - She doesn't like dairy?
0:39:20 > 0:39:22That's lovely. Well, she'll go...
0:39:22 > 0:39:24# Ye-ay-ay-ay-ay-eah... #
0:39:24 > 0:39:25LAUGHTER
0:39:26 > 0:39:28Reggae.
0:39:28 > 0:39:31MUSIC: Boombastic by Shaggy
0:39:31 > 0:39:33AUDIENCE CLAP IN RHYTHM
0:39:38 > 0:39:40Enough, enough, enough!
0:39:40 > 0:39:43OK, now, Aly, we'll let you carry on there,
0:39:43 > 0:39:47we're going to go back in to Phillip and the Birdwoman of Alcatraz.
0:39:47 > 0:39:49And we'll see what they're up to. Follow me.
0:39:49 > 0:39:51- AUDIENCE:- Woo!
0:39:55 > 0:39:59- You make it easy for us. - You two, you two and your stories.
0:39:59 > 0:40:02Well, we had a great time in the kitchen.
0:40:03 > 0:40:08Now, just one more thing. Phil, one of our favourite shows is The Cube.
0:40:08 > 0:40:09Big time, big time...
0:40:09 > 0:40:11- AUDIENCE:- Ooh! - Big, big fans.
0:40:11 > 0:40:14How do you think you would get on with one of those games?
0:40:14 > 0:40:17Cos we never actually see you playing.
0:40:17 > 0:40:19I've played a few when we were rehearsing,
0:40:19 > 0:40:22and some I'm all right, some I'm very, very bad.
0:40:22 > 0:40:26- Holly, do you think you could beat Phil?- I am ridiculously competitive.
0:40:26 > 0:40:29- OK.- Stand by, stand by, I have the game...
0:40:36 > 0:40:39- Can I help? - Oh, no, I'm ready for this.
0:40:39 > 0:40:43I use this to feed Grandad when he's not in form for eating.
0:40:45 > 0:40:47LAUGHTER
0:40:49 > 0:40:51APPLAUSE
0:40:53 > 0:40:56So we have some cherry tomatoes here.
0:40:56 > 0:40:59- Just going to choose my weapon. - Choose your weapon.
0:40:59 > 0:41:02And the idea is to get it into the funnel...
0:41:02 > 0:41:06and then it will work its way down and feed Grandad.
0:41:06 > 0:41:11- So we can just lower the lights. AUDIENCE:- Ooh.- OK.
0:41:11 > 0:41:12Build up a bit of tension.
0:41:12 > 0:41:14TENSE MUSIC
0:41:14 > 0:41:17And then it's go on, Holly. Go on, go on.
0:41:17 > 0:41:19- OK.- Holly is taking off her shoes!
0:41:19 > 0:41:20- AUDIENCE:- Ooh!
0:41:21 > 0:41:24- OK, in my own time? - In your own time, Holly.
0:41:24 > 0:41:26- ALL:- Ohh!
0:41:26 > 0:41:30- It was so close.- OK, Phillip. - I'm better than you.
0:41:30 > 0:41:32LAUGHTER
0:41:32 > 0:41:34Uh, yet to be proved, Schofield.
0:41:34 > 0:41:36SHE SHOUTS TO DISTRACT HIM
0:41:36 > 0:41:38FANFARE
0:41:38 > 0:41:40APPLAUSE
0:41:45 > 0:41:46Well done!
0:41:48 > 0:41:52- Congratulations, Phillip, well done.- Thank you.
0:41:52 > 0:41:54Hopefully we've built up a bit of an appetite.
0:41:54 > 0:41:57Well, let's find out. I'll check with Aly.
0:41:57 > 0:42:00- Excuse me a moment, please, thank you very much.- Thanks, Mammy.
0:42:04 > 0:42:08Oh, Aly, that is beautiful. Look at that!
0:42:08 > 0:42:09CHEERING Come on.
0:42:12 > 0:42:16- Ooh-ooh.- Wow.- Look at them.
0:42:16 > 0:42:18- Oh, my God.- Wow.
0:42:20 > 0:42:24- Isn't that just gorgeous? - Oh, it smells...- It does indeed.
0:42:24 > 0:42:29- So, Aly, tell us what we have here? - We have a chicken kiev for Holly...
0:42:29 > 0:42:31- HOLLY:- Thank you.
0:42:31 > 0:42:34..and we have also cream scones with all the fruit,
0:42:34 > 0:42:39and the best of Cornwall for Phil, and I haven't forgot you, Lulu.
0:42:39 > 0:42:41I got that for you.
0:42:41 > 0:42:43Ohhh, Lulu.
0:42:47 > 0:42:51Right, you dish it up.
0:42:51 > 0:42:55Follow me to the audience. I've got some scones, look at that.
0:42:57 > 0:43:01Let's see who'd like to try the Cornish tea.
0:43:01 > 0:43:04- The happy couple, would you like to try one?- Yes, please.
0:43:04 > 0:43:05I said buckin' one.
0:43:08 > 0:43:10- There you go.- Thanks, darling.
0:43:10 > 0:43:13That's for feeling my wig, thank you.
0:43:15 > 0:43:19Definitely getting a thumbs up here. Ten out of ten from the audience.
0:43:19 > 0:43:21APPLAUSE
0:43:22 > 0:43:27OK, guys. Holly, Phil, Lulu, what do you think?
0:43:27 > 0:43:29- Is it better than your mum's? - Steady on.
0:43:31 > 0:43:34I don't know about you, Holly, it's not the microwave!
0:43:35 > 0:43:37It's a revelation.
0:43:37 > 0:43:41Well, that's all we have time for on The Cathy Brown Show tonight,
0:43:41 > 0:43:43a huge thanks to all my guests.
0:43:43 > 0:43:44Lulu...
0:43:44 > 0:43:46CHEERING
0:43:46 > 0:43:47Holly!
0:43:47 > 0:43:49Phillip!
0:43:49 > 0:43:51Lynne and Pat!
0:43:52 > 0:43:54And of course, Chef Aly!
0:43:57 > 0:44:00Join us next week, when Cathy will be joined by James Bond
0:44:00 > 0:44:02and Mickey Rooney's mother in a matchbox.
0:44:02 > 0:44:05LAUGHTER
0:44:05 > 0:44:06No, I won't, Mammy. We'll see you soon,
0:44:06 > 0:44:10and we'll go over now to Father Damien and Trevor
0:44:10 > 0:44:12for Thought for the Day. Goodnight.
0:44:18 > 0:44:24Hello there. As you can see, Father Damien and I are playing cards.
0:44:24 > 0:44:25Poker.
0:44:25 > 0:44:27Now, I wouldn't recommended gambling to anyone,
0:44:27 > 0:44:30but a friendly game of cards in the evening can be fun.
0:44:30 > 0:44:33You know, winning isn't everything.
0:44:33 > 0:44:35- Where were we?- It's your bet.
0:44:35 > 0:44:37OK, let me think.
0:44:39 > 0:44:42I often think about the Bible when I'm playing cards.
0:44:42 > 0:44:46For instance, when I see these three kings, I think of
0:44:46 > 0:44:49the wise kings that sought out the Baby Jesus
0:44:49 > 0:44:50to acknowledge him as the Christ.
0:44:50 > 0:44:53That's right, Trevor, they followed a star for days that they knew
0:44:53 > 0:44:56would lead them to where the Blessed Virgin Mary was.
0:44:56 > 0:44:59In a cold stable, swaddling the Saviour.
0:44:59 > 0:45:01That's right, Damien.
0:45:01 > 0:45:04And when I see three jacks, I think of the shepherds that
0:45:04 > 0:45:07those wise kings stopped to ask for directions.
0:45:07 > 0:45:10That's right, Damien, what else?
0:45:10 > 0:45:14When I see a 10, I think of the Ten Commandments Moses
0:45:14 > 0:45:16brought down from the mountain.
0:45:16 > 0:45:17That's right, Damien.
0:45:17 > 0:45:20And did he have just one Ten Commandments, or two?
0:45:20 > 0:45:23Oh, just the one, Trevor.
0:45:23 > 0:45:26But they were on TWO tablets.
0:45:26 > 0:45:29Very good, Damien. Another lesson is,
0:45:29 > 0:45:33you will come across times in your life when you hold all the cards.
0:45:33 > 0:45:37So, what are you going to do, Damien?
0:45:37 > 0:45:40I'll raise you one euro.
0:45:41 > 0:45:45- Too good for me, Damien. - Yes! Yes! Yes!
0:45:47 > 0:45:50So, there's your two thoughts for the day - nothing wrong
0:45:50 > 0:45:53with a friendly game, winning isn't everything.
0:45:53 > 0:45:56# You're very flippin' quiet over there
0:45:56 > 0:45:59# You're very flippin' quiet over there... #
0:45:59 > 0:46:01OK, Damien, settle down.
0:46:01 > 0:46:03Good night.
0:46:06 > 0:46:10Well, it all seems to be going very well tonight, very well.
0:46:10 > 0:46:13It's lovely to see your children, like Cathy, doing so well,
0:46:13 > 0:46:17but it's not easy trying to being a mammy, it's not.
0:46:17 > 0:46:20You can only do your best to make sure they're happy.
0:46:20 > 0:46:21After that, feck them.
0:46:21 > 0:46:24LAUGHTER
0:46:24 > 0:46:27Things can go wrong from time to time.
0:46:27 > 0:46:29Say you were buying your son a flying lesson,
0:46:29 > 0:46:32one he'd always wanted, and then you end up ruining it
0:46:32 > 0:46:35by continually throwing up all over the back of the plane.
0:46:35 > 0:46:38Isn't that true, Neda Arshadi?
0:46:40 > 0:46:43Neda, our Mammy of the Week! Come on down to me, Neda.
0:46:43 > 0:46:45CHEERING
0:46:52 > 0:46:55Now, every week we want to reward a fine mammy
0:46:55 > 0:46:57with our Mammy of the Week award.
0:46:57 > 0:46:59And you've been nominated by your son John.
0:46:59 > 0:47:03And if any of you are wondering why, take a look at this.
0:47:05 > 0:47:07Hi, Mum, surprise, I have
0:47:07 > 0:47:10nominated you to be Mammy of the Week.
0:47:10 > 0:47:11I think you are the best mum in the world.
0:47:11 > 0:47:12RECORD SCRATCHES
0:47:12 > 0:47:15But you're also a total nightmare.
0:47:22 > 0:47:25She's belting out Christmas songs in July.
0:47:25 > 0:47:27I'm superstitious about that stuff.
0:47:29 > 0:47:32She's also a big fan of hugging mascots
0:47:32 > 0:47:34outside toyshops and talking to them.
0:47:34 > 0:47:36I don't understand why.
0:47:40 > 0:47:42- She loves saying- BLEEP- and- BLEEP.
0:47:46 > 0:47:50Despite all the things that you've done that I consider embarrassing,
0:47:50 > 0:47:53you really are a superwoman who does everything for us.
0:47:53 > 0:47:57We all think you're amazing and we don't know what we'd do without you.
0:47:59 > 0:48:01- AUDIENCE:- Woo!
0:48:05 > 0:48:08Now it's tough being a mammy, but like me you have a best friend
0:48:08 > 0:48:11you like to bounce everything off and share a cup of tea with, am I right?
0:48:11 > 0:48:13- Oh, yes.- What's her name?- Wendy. - And she's here tonight.
0:48:13 > 0:48:16- No. - NEDA LAUGHS
0:48:16 > 0:48:18- She's watching at home, though. - Is she?
0:48:18 > 0:48:21Yeah, she loves the programme, she's Irish as well.
0:48:21 > 0:48:22- Oh, is she Irish?- Yeah!
0:48:22 > 0:48:24Hello, Wendy. Go home to Ireland.
0:48:28 > 0:48:29Well, I want to give you this award,
0:48:29 > 0:48:32but first you have to play a game, and the game is up in my boxroom.
0:48:32 > 0:48:35Come up and see what's in Mammy's Box.
0:48:37 > 0:48:40# It's going to make your day, it's going to rock your socks
0:48:40 > 0:48:43# When you've seen what's in Mammy's Box. #
0:48:45 > 0:48:47Close that door now, close that door.
0:48:49 > 0:48:52Now, the way this works is this.
0:48:52 > 0:48:54I'm going to give you one of my best tea towels.
0:48:54 > 0:48:57And you can see they're all covered in prizes.
0:48:57 > 0:48:59He has prizes, she has prizes.
0:48:59 > 0:49:03Look at this, cinema tickets - you have to be over 18.
0:49:03 > 0:49:04LAUGHTER
0:49:04 > 0:49:08And then he has one or two prizes as well...
0:49:08 > 0:49:12It's entirely up to you, you can pick my son Mark,
0:49:12 > 0:49:17or you can pick the lovely Maria, or...Buster!
0:49:17 > 0:49:19CHEERING
0:49:19 > 0:49:22- Whichever one you want to pick. - I think I'll pick Buster.
0:49:22 > 0:49:23Great choice!
0:49:25 > 0:49:28OK, Maria, off you go, and off you go there, Mark.
0:49:28 > 0:49:30Now, time starts as soon as he starts spinning,
0:49:30 > 0:49:32keep going until you hear the gong.
0:49:32 > 0:49:36I'll just put that down there, because you might need some help.
0:49:36 > 0:49:39NEDA LAUGHS
0:49:39 > 0:49:42Stand yourself there, we'll give him a little spin to get him going,
0:49:42 > 0:49:44here we go - and the time starts now.
0:49:52 > 0:49:55LOUD SLAPPING
0:49:57 > 0:49:59- AUDIENCE:- Yay!
0:50:05 > 0:50:08- Ohhh.- OK.
0:50:10 > 0:50:13I make that 331 euro!
0:50:13 > 0:50:15CHEERING
0:50:18 > 0:50:21Gather up the stars, let's see what you've got.
0:50:21 > 0:50:25You've won, eh... NEDA LAUGHS
0:50:25 > 0:50:27You've won make-up...
0:50:28 > 0:50:30- Not that you need it.- Awww.
0:50:30 > 0:50:33- You've won a manicure.- Ooh!
0:50:33 > 0:50:35- Flowers.- Aww.
0:50:36 > 0:50:38- And the key to my box. - The key to your box.
0:50:40 > 0:50:43OK, you take the key out that and I'll go and get me box.
0:50:45 > 0:50:46- AUDIENCE:- Woo!
0:50:49 > 0:50:54There. We'll open the box.
0:50:54 > 0:50:56And I'll let you...
0:50:56 > 0:50:58LAUGHTER
0:50:58 > 0:50:59I'll let you open the box, Neda.
0:51:02 > 0:51:03DA-DA!
0:51:05 > 0:51:07Ohh!
0:51:09 > 0:51:10You can bring Wendy.
0:51:13 > 0:51:18Most important for Neda, our Mammy of the Week.
0:51:21 > 0:51:28Neda, it's Indian night down at Foley's and I'm dying for a curry.
0:51:28 > 0:51:29I'll have to shoot down.
0:51:29 > 0:51:31While I'm doing that, just tidy up around here,
0:51:31 > 0:51:34and if Buster throws up, mop it up.
0:51:36 > 0:51:38Neda - give her a round of applause.
0:51:45 > 0:51:47CHEERING
0:51:55 > 0:51:58Oh, I hope these Kaiser Chiefs are quick, get here soon,
0:51:58 > 0:52:00cos I want to shake me boogie.
0:52:01 > 0:52:03Oh, look!
0:52:03 > 0:52:04- AUDIENCE:- Woo!
0:52:08 > 0:52:10How are you?
0:52:10 > 0:52:14- Oh, Ricky...- How you doing? - So good to see you.
0:52:15 > 0:52:20- How you doing?- Fantastic. Obviously not as good as you.- I'm doing great.
0:52:20 > 0:52:23I've seen you on every TV programme that there is!
0:52:23 > 0:52:26You've got to get your face out there, get the profile up.
0:52:26 > 0:52:29I know you and the boys are singing the new single,
0:52:29 > 0:52:32it's called Hole in my Soul, No Arse in My Trousers.
0:52:32 > 0:52:34LAUGHTER No, no!
0:52:35 > 0:52:40No, it's not. No, no, it's called Hole in my Soul.
0:52:40 > 0:52:41It is, yes.
0:52:41 > 0:52:44Any possibility you would sing one of my favourites?
0:52:44 > 0:52:48I like the Tony Bennetts, Jim Reeves, Frank Sinatra,
0:52:48 > 0:52:49you know any of those songs?
0:52:49 > 0:52:52- Are you asking for a request? - Would you mind?
0:52:54 > 0:52:56# And now...
0:52:56 > 0:52:58# The end is near... #
0:52:58 > 0:52:59Well, we've about seven minutes.
0:52:59 > 0:53:01LAUGHTER
0:53:01 > 0:53:04# And so I face the final curtain... #
0:53:04 > 0:53:06No more shows after this one, no?
0:53:06 > 0:53:10# My friend, I'll say my... #
0:53:10 > 0:53:12- You'll say it clear. - # ..clear
0:53:12 > 0:53:14- # I'll state my case... # - He'll state his case.
0:53:14 > 0:53:15# Of which I'm certain... #
0:53:15 > 0:53:17Nearly certain!
0:53:17 > 0:53:19- # I've lived... - I've lived...
0:53:19 > 0:53:21- BOTH:- # A life that's full
0:53:21 > 0:53:25- ALL:- # I've travelled each and every highway... #
0:53:25 > 0:53:27In a van with those reprobates.
0:53:27 > 0:53:28M1!
0:53:28 > 0:53:31# Much more than this... #
0:53:31 > 0:53:32All together!
0:53:32 > 0:53:36# I did it my way. #
0:53:36 > 0:53:38Thank you so much.
0:53:38 > 0:53:39CHEERING
0:53:39 > 0:53:42Thank you for having us on, we really appreciate it.
0:53:42 > 0:53:46Thank you, Ricky. Ricky...
0:53:46 > 0:53:48- AUDIENCE:- Ooh!
0:53:48 > 0:53:50Ricky, Ricky...
0:53:50 > 0:53:52LAUGHTER
0:54:01 > 0:54:05Ladies and gentlemen, now singing from their latest album,
0:54:05 > 0:54:10which is magnificent, Hole in my Soul, the Kaiser Chiefs!
0:54:20 > 0:54:23# Strike up the band
0:54:23 > 0:54:28# Give yourself a great big hand
0:54:28 > 0:54:31# And all together now
0:54:31 > 0:54:35# All together now, strike up the band
0:54:35 > 0:54:39# Bring down the house
0:54:39 > 0:54:46# Once more with feeling now, I'll try to make it count
0:54:46 > 0:54:53# It's all for you, so take a bow
0:54:53 > 0:54:57# And everybody gave up
0:54:57 > 0:55:00# Until we start from the top again
0:55:01 > 0:55:05# Take it all from the top, the top, the top, the top
0:55:05 > 0:55:08# There's a hole in my soul
0:55:08 > 0:55:12# That can only be filled by you again
0:55:12 > 0:55:16# There's a hole in my soul
0:55:16 > 0:55:20# That could only be fixed by two
0:55:20 > 0:55:23# It can never be filled, never be filled
0:55:23 > 0:55:28# Never be filled by anyone else but you
0:55:28 > 0:55:31# It can never be filled, never be filled
0:55:31 > 0:55:35# Never be filled by anyone else but you... #
0:55:38 > 0:55:40How's it going? Is it going all right?
0:55:40 > 0:55:42- Amazing.- Going all right?- Amazing!
0:55:44 > 0:55:46# Whip up the crowd
0:55:47 > 0:55:51# Get 'em going nice and loud
0:55:51 > 0:55:54# You're the only one I see
0:55:54 > 0:55:59# You're the only one, it's you and me
0:56:02 > 0:56:04# Everybody gave up
0:56:04 > 0:56:08# Until we start from the top again
0:56:08 > 0:56:13# Take it all from the top, the top, the top, the top
0:56:13 > 0:56:16# There's a hole in my soul
0:56:16 > 0:56:20# That can only be filled by you again
0:56:20 > 0:56:24# There's a hole in my soul
0:56:24 > 0:56:28# That can only be PHIL-ED by two
0:56:28 > 0:56:32# It can never be filled, never be filled
0:56:32 > 0:56:37# Never be PHIL-ED by anyone else but you
0:56:37 > 0:56:40# It can never be filled, never be filled
0:56:40 > 0:56:43# Never be filled by anyone else but you... #
0:56:43 > 0:56:45Yeah!
0:56:45 > 0:56:48- AUDIENCE:- Woo! - How's it going, all right?
0:56:51 > 0:56:57# You find each person in the world the same
0:56:58 > 0:57:02# We're just the same
0:57:02 > 0:57:05# We're the same
0:57:06 > 0:57:09# There's a hole in my soul
0:57:09 > 0:57:14# That can only be filled by you again
0:57:14 > 0:57:17# There's a HOLLY in my soul
0:57:17 > 0:57:21# That can only be filled by you again
0:57:21 > 0:57:25# There's a hole in my soul
0:57:25 > 0:57:29# That a galaxy could fit through. #
0:57:30 > 0:57:32Thank you.
0:57:32 > 0:57:34CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:57:40 > 0:57:43A wonderful night again tonight. How lucky are we?
0:57:43 > 0:57:47It was lovely meeting Marie McDonald McLaughlin Lawrie.
0:57:47 > 0:57:48Or as you call her, Lulu.
0:57:50 > 0:57:52She's such a real star.
0:57:52 > 0:57:55And what about our two mammy guests, Pat and Lynne?
0:57:55 > 0:57:58I bet they could tell more stories than they were letting on.
0:57:58 > 0:58:01And Adam Woodyatt, what a perfect guest for Dermot.
0:58:01 > 0:58:03Even looked like a bus conductor!
0:58:03 > 0:58:05LAUGHTER
0:58:05 > 0:58:07The thing I've enjoyed most about these guests
0:58:07 > 0:58:10so far is they've all been nice people.
0:58:11 > 0:58:14And none nicer than Phillip Schofield, he's such a gentleman.
0:58:14 > 0:58:17And then there's Holly Willoughby, award-winner, figure like
0:58:17 > 0:58:21an hourglass, golden hair, gorgeous face - she makes me sick.
0:58:23 > 0:58:26Still, they brighten my day every time they say "good morning"
0:58:26 > 0:58:29on This Morning. And now it's time for me to say goodnight to you.
0:58:29 > 0:58:32Have a great weekend, and I hope that any rain that falls
0:58:32 > 0:58:36into your life this weekend is followed by a rainbow. Goodnight.
0:58:36 > 0:58:39CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:58:43 > 0:58:46# Make a date, don't be late
0:58:46 > 0:58:48# Cos you know it's going to be great
0:58:48 > 0:58:53# When the irrepressible Browns come to town
0:58:53 > 0:58:59# To begin, just tune in, and you'll wear an ear-to-ear grin
0:58:59 > 0:59:03# Watching Agnes and her clan act the clown
0:59:04 > 0:59:07# Instead of feeling depressed
0:59:07 > 0:59:08# We have to make you feel best
0:59:10 > 0:59:14# So it's All Round To Mrs Brown's! #