0:00:02 > 0:00:03# Make a date, don't be late
0:00:03 > 0:00:05# Cos you know it's gonna be great
0:00:05 > 0:00:09# When the irrepressible Browns come to town
0:00:11 > 0:00:13# To begin, just tune in
0:00:13 > 0:00:16# And you'll wear a nuclear grin
0:00:16 > 0:00:20# Watching Agnes and the clan act the clown
0:00:21 > 0:00:23# Instead of feeling depressed
0:00:23 > 0:00:26# Let laughter make you feel blessed
0:00:26 > 0:00:31# So it's all round to Mrs Brown's. #
0:00:31 > 0:00:34CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:00:34 > 0:00:39Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to All Round To Mrs Brown's!
0:00:39 > 0:00:44This programme contains some strong language and adult humour from the start.
0:00:44 > 0:00:47CHEERING
0:00:47 > 0:00:49Hello!
0:00:49 > 0:00:50Hello!
0:00:53 > 0:00:57Oh, you're all very welcome to another Saturday night of cra...
0:00:57 > 0:00:59of, er, fun and frolics.
0:00:59 > 0:01:01SHE CHUCKLES
0:01:01 > 0:01:03It's party night down at Foley's tonight.
0:01:03 > 0:01:06Live music. I believe it's going to be wonderful.
0:01:06 > 0:01:08Oh, and they're doing cocktails.
0:01:08 > 0:01:10I don't drink much any more.
0:01:10 > 0:01:13I used to - my mother said I had a hollow leg.
0:01:15 > 0:01:16I don't any more.
0:01:16 > 0:01:19I've often thought about drowning my troubles.
0:01:19 > 0:01:21But Grandad won't go swimming.
0:01:24 > 0:01:25A lot of people don't know,
0:01:25 > 0:01:28but Grandad was actually born a Siamese twin.
0:01:28 > 0:01:30Yeah, joined at the penis.
0:01:33 > 0:01:34The operation was a complete failure!
0:01:36 > 0:01:37But the prick survived.
0:01:40 > 0:01:42- Are you there, Agnes? - I'm in here, Winnie.
0:01:42 > 0:01:45- Get yourself a cuppa, I'll be in in a sec.- Right.
0:01:46 > 0:01:48- How are you, love?- How are you, pet?
0:01:48 > 0:01:50- SHE SIGHS - Lovely.
0:01:50 > 0:01:54Here... I have a joke for you.
0:01:55 > 0:01:57Really? Fire away.
0:01:57 > 0:01:59Knock, knock!
0:01:59 > 0:02:01Who's there?
0:02:01 > 0:02:02An interrupting cow.
0:02:04 > 0:02:05- An interrupting...- MOO!
0:02:05 > 0:02:07SHE LAUGHS
0:02:13 > 0:02:14Here...
0:02:15 > 0:02:17Here, Sharon asked me to drop this in to you.
0:02:17 > 0:02:19It's an invitation for the party night at Foley's.
0:02:19 > 0:02:23- Oh, lovely.- She's doing cocktails and everything.- Yeah.
0:02:23 > 0:02:25- Have you ever had cocktails? - No.- You'll love them.- Yeah?
0:02:25 > 0:02:27They give them some weird names,
0:02:27 > 0:02:29like a Sloe Comfortable Screw...
0:02:29 > 0:02:31Ohh!
0:02:31 > 0:02:33- Yeah, Sex On The Beach.- Right!
0:02:33 > 0:02:34There's even one called a Blow Job.
0:02:34 > 0:02:36No!
0:02:36 > 0:02:40I remember the day after Reg's funeral, I brought his ashes home,
0:02:40 > 0:02:42and I just took a little pinch out and I went,
0:02:42 > 0:02:45"Pfff! There's the blow job you always wanted now!"
0:02:49 > 0:02:52CHEERING
0:02:54 > 0:02:56How are you, Mammy?
0:02:56 > 0:03:00Is Cathy here? One of our guests wants to meet her before the show.
0:03:00 > 0:03:01Cathy's upstairs. My God!
0:03:01 > 0:03:05It's Dorothy Perkins, from the Great British Shake Off!
0:03:05 > 0:03:07No, Mammy, SUE Perkins.
0:03:07 > 0:03:10Will you keep an eye on her while I go and get Cathy?
0:03:10 > 0:03:14- Absolutely, sit down, Dorothy. - It's-It's Sue. It's Sue.
0:03:14 > 0:03:16And I'm PS, I'm post-sponge now.
0:03:18 > 0:03:19This is my friend, Winnie.
0:03:19 > 0:03:22- Hey, Winnie, how are you? - It's lovely to meet you, Sue.
0:03:22 > 0:03:26- Nice to see you, darling, how are you?- Here, I'd better go, Agnes.
0:03:26 > 0:03:28- OK, Winnie.- Oh, Sue?
0:03:28 > 0:03:30If you drop into Foley's later,
0:03:30 > 0:03:32I might treat you to a...
0:03:32 > 0:03:36- Fuck! Sorry.- Wow! I'm in!
0:03:36 > 0:03:38No, no, no! She didn't mean that.
0:03:40 > 0:03:43Ha-ha! I didn't mean that!
0:03:44 > 0:03:46Get in there!
0:03:48 > 0:03:52This is a very different show from what I'm used to...
0:03:52 > 0:03:54This...
0:03:54 > 0:03:57- Well!- I'm sorry. - In for a penny, in for a penny...
0:03:59 > 0:04:01Such a refreshing change from a drink.
0:04:05 > 0:04:06- Sorry, Sue.- It's all right.
0:04:06 > 0:04:09Many thresholds have been crossed!
0:04:09 > 0:04:11She hasn't had sex in a long time, so...
0:04:13 > 0:04:16- So nice to meet you, Sue. - Pleased to meet you too, darling.
0:04:16 > 0:04:20- I'd better go, Agnes. - Oh, please, yeah.- Oh, and Sue?
0:04:20 > 0:04:21If you pop into Foley's later,
0:04:21 > 0:04:23I might treat you to a Blow Job.
0:04:28 > 0:04:30- So, tell me, Sue...- Yes?
0:04:30 > 0:04:33I don't want to pry into too many things, but Mary Berry, oh!
0:04:33 > 0:04:35So, she's a bitch, is she?
0:04:36 > 0:04:39Yourself and Mel, yous must have met very young, because there's
0:04:39 > 0:04:42a chemistry there that you don't get with other people.
0:04:42 > 0:04:45- We met up 30 years ago next year, 30 years.- You don't even look 30!
0:04:45 > 0:04:47Oh, you are such a charmer.
0:04:47 > 0:04:50And you need a new prescription!
0:04:50 > 0:04:52No, you don't, but can I just...
0:04:52 > 0:04:53Oh, no!
0:04:53 > 0:04:55CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:04:55 > 0:04:57He's nicked this off Mary Berry, you know!
0:04:57 > 0:04:59Off her line!
0:04:59 > 0:05:01Well, come on, let's get you down to Wash and Blow,
0:05:01 > 0:05:03- Rory wants to get you ready for the show.- Let's do it.
0:05:03 > 0:05:08I can't wait to hear about your new documentary, exploring the Ganges!
0:05:08 > 0:05:11- Yes.- Sounds fascinating!- Thank you! - See you later.- Bye, darling.
0:05:11 > 0:05:12Bye-bye.
0:05:12 > 0:05:14Oh, great.
0:05:14 > 0:05:16Exploring the Ganges!
0:05:16 > 0:05:18You don't have to tell me about the Ganges.
0:05:18 > 0:05:20I was young once, I used to...
0:05:20 > 0:05:22I'm no stranger to the old jazz cigarettes.
0:05:25 > 0:05:28Well, anyway, here we are, another Saturday night together.
0:05:28 > 0:05:31And the best thing of all for me about these shows is
0:05:31 > 0:05:33that I got to meet all of you, the audience.
0:05:33 > 0:05:35You're fantastic, you really are marvellous.
0:05:38 > 0:05:40In fact...
0:05:41 > 0:05:44..I'm going to meet some of you now!
0:05:44 > 0:05:47Let's see if we've got anyone interesting in tonight.
0:05:47 > 0:05:50# Tonight, tonight... #
0:05:50 > 0:05:52Terry Smith. Where's Terry?
0:05:52 > 0:05:55- Here.- Hello, Terry. How are you?- Fine, thanks.
0:05:55 > 0:05:58Terry is one of the people that we all should know and thank.
0:05:58 > 0:06:01He's an emergency medical technician. Good to see you, Terry.
0:06:05 > 0:06:08If you get a call from this house about a grandad...
0:06:11 > 0:06:12..take your buckin' time.
0:06:15 > 0:06:16Jackie and Chris Carter?
0:06:16 > 0:06:19Oh, hi! How are you doing?
0:06:19 > 0:06:22It says here, Jackie and Chris, mother and son.
0:06:22 > 0:06:23- Oh, you're in a pipe band?- Yeah.
0:06:23 > 0:06:26- And Chris is a world champion pipe player, well done!- Yeah.
0:06:26 > 0:06:28Well done, give him a round of applause!
0:06:32 > 0:06:35And Jackie, you play pipes as well?
0:06:35 > 0:06:38- No, drums.- Drums?- Drums.
0:06:41 > 0:06:44You know, in a band, nobody shags the drummer?
0:06:45 > 0:06:48- Do you have your pipes with you? - Yeah, I do.
0:06:48 > 0:06:49Why?
0:06:51 > 0:06:54- Will you give us a demonstration? - Yeah.- Great stuff!
0:06:54 > 0:06:56Not too loud.
0:06:56 > 0:06:57CHEERING
0:06:57 > 0:07:00HE STARTS TO PLAY THE BAGPIPES
0:07:00 > 0:07:02That'll do, that'll do.
0:07:02 > 0:07:06HE PLAYS 'SCOTLAND THE BRAVE'
0:07:06 > 0:07:09AUDIENCE CLAPPING IN TIME
0:07:22 > 0:07:23Thank you, well done!
0:07:29 > 0:07:32I can see why you're a world champion.
0:07:32 > 0:07:34Jackie, where was the buckin' drum?
0:07:37 > 0:07:42Every week, we have people who are interesting in, it's lovely.
0:07:42 > 0:07:44As well as their special... Oh, hello.
0:07:44 > 0:07:46CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:07:46 > 0:07:48Hello, Mammy.
0:07:48 > 0:07:51Oh, Mammy, isn't Sue Perkins really lovely?
0:07:51 > 0:07:54Oh, she's so nice, she really is. How's the show going?
0:07:54 > 0:07:59Really well. As well as Sue Perkins, I'm going to have Ashley Banjo on.
0:07:59 > 0:08:02Ashley Banjo! CHEERING
0:08:02 > 0:08:03Who's Ashley Banjo?
0:08:03 > 0:08:04Oh, Mammy!
0:08:04 > 0:08:06You know, Ashley Banjo, from Diversity!
0:08:06 > 0:08:08Oh, I remember! The dancer?
0:08:08 > 0:08:10- Yeah!- Oh, yes.
0:08:10 > 0:08:12He won Britain's Nearly Got Talent.
0:08:13 > 0:08:17Oh, no, Mammy, I love all his Diversity dance routines.
0:08:17 > 0:08:18And you should see him,
0:08:18 > 0:08:21- he's a brilliant judge on all of his TV shows.- Is he?
0:08:21 > 0:08:23Yeah, and then he teaches all those young kids how to dance.
0:08:23 > 0:08:26- You seem to know an awful lot about him.- Mammy!
0:08:26 > 0:08:30I'm just saying... Do you no harm to try a bit of perfume...
0:08:30 > 0:08:33- Stop it, Mammy. - Just put on a wee bit of perfume,
0:08:33 > 0:08:35might say to him, when you get the chance,
0:08:35 > 0:08:38"Can I have a whack on your banjo?"
0:08:39 > 0:08:42I'm going to do my research somewhere else.
0:08:42 > 0:08:44- See you later.- See you.
0:08:47 > 0:08:49- Are you here, Ma? - CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:08:49 > 0:08:51Oh-ho, yeah, look who's here!
0:08:53 > 0:08:55- Hello, son.- Hiya, Ma.
0:08:55 > 0:08:58- Hello, Mrs Brown... - Don't even buckin' think about it.
0:08:58 > 0:09:02How are you, son? Well, how did your Sherlock Holmes walk go?
0:09:02 > 0:09:04A bit too much walking, if I'm honest, Ma.
0:09:04 > 0:09:05Yeah, I don't blame you, son.
0:09:05 > 0:09:08Dermot said the celebrity that we got couldn't talk.
0:09:08 > 0:09:09But she could! I heard her.
0:09:09 > 0:09:13No, Buster. I said she was in Silent Witness.
0:09:15 > 0:09:17Well...
0:09:17 > 0:09:19I'm sure I heard her speaking.
0:09:20 > 0:09:22Mind you, I could have been lip reading.
0:09:24 > 0:09:26It depends. Was she wearing tight trousers?
0:09:31 > 0:09:35- Shut up, Buster.- Yeah, Buster, shut up, Buster! So, what happened, love?
0:09:35 > 0:09:38Well, it's another long story, Ma.
0:09:38 > 0:09:40Well, look here, I have to go down to Foley's on my bike,
0:09:40 > 0:09:42you get on the crossbar and you can tell me on the way down.
0:09:42 > 0:09:45Oh, here, hold on! We never gave it a wobble.
0:09:45 > 0:09:47Oh, jeez! Yes, the wobble.
0:09:47 > 0:09:50So, it's a long story? Well, tell me, son!
0:09:54 > 0:09:57MUSIC: Watching The Detectives by Elvis Costello and the Attractions
0:09:57 > 0:09:59# Watching the detectives
0:10:00 > 0:10:02# Don't get cute... #
0:10:02 > 0:10:05# It's just like watching the detectives... #
0:10:05 > 0:10:07I'm not sure about this, Dermo.
0:10:07 > 0:10:09Doesn't feel right, being dressed like this.
0:10:09 > 0:10:12Our very own Sherlock Holmes walking tour.
0:10:12 > 0:10:14The tips are going to come flooding in!
0:10:14 > 0:10:17- Where's the celebrity? The customers are waiting.- Who?
0:10:17 > 0:10:20Emilia Fox. From Silent Witness.
0:10:20 > 0:10:22- Silent Witness?- Ssh!
0:10:23 > 0:10:25Ah.
0:10:25 > 0:10:26Here she is.
0:10:26 > 0:10:27Come on, let's meet her.
0:10:27 > 0:10:30MUSIC: She's A Lady by Tom Jones
0:10:30 > 0:10:32# She's a lady
0:10:32 > 0:10:34# Whoa, whoa, whoa
0:10:34 > 0:10:36# She's a lady
0:10:37 > 0:10:40# Talkin' about that little lady
0:10:41 > 0:10:44# And the lady is mine....
0:10:45 > 0:10:47# Yeah, yay....
0:10:47 > 0:10:49# She's a lady... #
0:10:49 > 0:10:50- 'Allo, 'allo!- Oi, oi!
0:10:50 > 0:10:52- EMILIA LAUGHS - I'm Emilia.
0:10:52 > 0:10:55- Hello.- Hello, Emilia. - EMILIA LAUGHS
0:10:55 > 0:10:57I thought you said she couldn't talk.
0:10:57 > 0:10:59Shut up, Buster.
0:10:59 > 0:11:01- You look fantastic.- Thanks so much!
0:11:01 > 0:11:03You look pretty fantastic, too.
0:11:03 > 0:11:06- Well, all you need now is the famous pipe.- Mm-hm.
0:11:06 > 0:11:07Buster.
0:11:07 > 0:11:09MUSIC
0:11:09 > 0:11:11- Don't you mean this? - MUSIC WARPS AND STOPS
0:11:11 > 0:11:12Put that away, Buster.
0:11:12 > 0:11:14MUSIC: The Final Countdown by Europe
0:11:14 > 0:11:15Hello, everybody!
0:11:15 > 0:11:18Thank you for joining the D&B Sherlock Holmes walking tour!
0:11:18 > 0:11:20CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:11:20 > 0:11:23We will explore the crime-ridden streets of old London today
0:11:23 > 0:11:27through the eyes and mind of the great Sherlock Holmes.
0:11:27 > 0:11:29Just in case yous are all wondering,
0:11:29 > 0:11:32we're not really coppers. We're just dressed up.
0:11:32 > 0:11:36And I have never been to prison - and I'm not going back.
0:11:36 > 0:11:40Please welcome our celebrity guide, star of Silent witness,
0:11:40 > 0:11:43and indeed Sherlock Holmes expert, Emilia Fox.
0:11:43 > 0:11:45- CHEERING AND APPLAUSE - Thank you so much.
0:11:45 > 0:11:48Well, I suppose this is the best place to start,
0:11:48 > 0:11:52the home of the great man himself, in Baker Street.
0:11:52 > 0:11:54MUSIC: Baker Street by Gerry Rafferty
0:11:54 > 0:11:56Thank you, Buster.
0:11:56 > 0:11:58- MUSIC STOPS - Erm...
0:11:58 > 0:12:02So, many of the Sherlock Holmes stories begin at the crime scene,
0:12:02 > 0:12:07but the solving of those crimes begins right here,
0:12:07 > 0:12:10in flat 221B...Baker Street.
0:12:11 > 0:12:13MUSIC RESUMES
0:12:13 > 0:12:15Stop it.
0:12:16 > 0:12:18Buster, stop it.
0:12:18 > 0:12:19Stop it!
0:12:19 > 0:12:21MUSIC STOPS
0:12:21 > 0:12:23- POLICE SIREN - Oi, oi, oi, oi!
0:12:23 > 0:12:25Move, move, move, move!
0:12:25 > 0:12:27Foxy, this way!
0:12:27 > 0:12:28Come on, let's go!
0:12:28 > 0:12:30MUSIC
0:12:35 > 0:12:37- WHISTLE - Move it, move it! Let's go.
0:12:37 > 0:12:40Time is money, time is money! On the double, at the double!
0:12:40 > 0:12:42Move! We're walking here!
0:12:44 > 0:12:45HIGH-PITCHED TIPTOE NOISES
0:12:50 > 0:12:54Now, this door here is one of the more famous landmarks
0:12:54 > 0:12:55in the Sherlock Holmes stories.
0:12:55 > 0:12:58It is where Sherlock himself and Dr Watson...
0:13:00 > 0:13:03MUSIC: The Fox by Ylvis
0:13:05 > 0:13:06TIPTOE NOISES
0:13:06 > 0:13:08# What the fox say? #
0:13:08 > 0:13:10Faster!
0:13:10 > 0:13:12Well, tonight they'll have heard of the walking tour,
0:13:12 > 0:13:13because we get to sit down!
0:13:13 > 0:13:16# What does the fox say? #
0:13:16 > 0:13:19This is a reconstruction of Sherlock Holmes' study
0:13:19 > 0:13:21as it appears in the books.
0:13:21 > 0:13:23Well, Emilia, that is so interesting.
0:13:23 > 0:13:27You should also know that this was Sherlock Holmes' local pub,
0:13:27 > 0:13:29where he was on the darts team.
0:13:29 > 0:13:31- No, he wasn't.- Shut up.
0:13:34 > 0:13:35Drink, drink, drink, drink, drink!
0:13:35 > 0:13:38Drink, drink, drink, drink!
0:13:38 > 0:13:41# We love you, Sherlock! We do!
0:13:41 > 0:13:45# We love you, Sherlock! We do!
0:13:45 > 0:13:48# We love you, Sherlock! We do!
0:13:48 > 0:13:52# Whoa, Sherlock, we love you! #
0:13:52 > 0:13:55- So, Emilia, quick question.- Mm-hm.
0:13:55 > 0:13:59Let's say a friend had some top quality speakers...
0:13:59 > 0:14:01- Mm-hm.- ..stored in his shed,
0:14:01 > 0:14:04but needed to move them, because he knew that the police
0:14:04 > 0:14:07were looking for them, where would you suggest he should hide them?
0:14:07 > 0:14:11I told you, I'm a pathologist, not a policeman.
0:14:13 > 0:14:15Do you want to buy some speakers?
0:14:15 > 0:14:16No!
0:14:18 > 0:14:20Unfortunately, ladies and gentlemen,
0:14:20 > 0:14:22that is the end of our Sherlock Holmes walking tour.
0:14:22 > 0:14:24We hope you enjoyed yourselves.
0:14:24 > 0:14:27If you did, show your appreciation with a tip.
0:14:27 > 0:14:30If you are happy to join, throw in a coin.
0:14:30 > 0:14:32If we raised the bar, fill up the jar!
0:14:32 > 0:14:36- Fill up the hat and don't be a...- Twa...- Hey!
0:14:36 > 0:14:39- Kids are watching, Emilia. Kids are watching.- Sorry. Sorry.
0:14:39 > 0:14:41Keep it classy.
0:14:41 > 0:14:43- Thank you. - Thank you.- Thank you.- Thank you.
0:14:43 > 0:14:47- Thank you.- Thank you. Thank you so much.
0:14:47 > 0:14:48Neigh!
0:14:48 > 0:14:50Didn't we do well?
0:14:50 > 0:14:53Didn't WE do well?
0:14:57 > 0:15:01THE BILL THEME PLAYS
0:15:12 > 0:15:14Well...
0:15:14 > 0:15:18It sounds like you did a smashing job, boys. Well done!
0:15:18 > 0:15:19Thanks, Ma.
0:15:19 > 0:15:21I went on a murder mystery tour with Winnie once.
0:15:21 > 0:15:23Yeah, for a weekend.
0:15:23 > 0:15:26It's a mystery I didn't mucking kill her.
0:15:26 > 0:15:28- Go on, I'll see you later. - See you, Ma.- See you, love.
0:15:28 > 0:15:30- See you, Mrs Brown.- Get lost.
0:15:32 > 0:15:34- All right, Winnie?- Oh, yeah. I got your coffee, pet.
0:15:34 > 0:15:36Oh, thank you, love.
0:15:36 > 0:15:38- Agnes.- What, Winnie?
0:15:38 > 0:15:41Why do most women have problems with their husbands?
0:15:41 > 0:15:43Some women do, but most women don't.
0:15:43 > 0:15:44Well, who don't, then?
0:15:44 > 0:15:46Widows.
0:15:48 > 0:15:50- Speaking about problems...- Mm.
0:15:50 > 0:15:52..we have some more in from the audience.
0:15:52 > 0:15:54Let's see who we have here.
0:15:54 > 0:15:56This one is from Marie Murray.
0:15:56 > 0:15:59- Hello, Marie, how are you? - Hi. I'm fine.- Good to see you.
0:15:59 > 0:16:04And she says, "Dear, Agnes, I have broken 11 bones in 11 years.
0:16:04 > 0:16:08"I could fall over a feather. How do I stop being so clumsy?"
0:16:11 > 0:16:13Stop drinking during the fecking day, Marie.
0:16:20 > 0:16:23- Where's Tom Clan?- Yeah, here. - Hello, Tom.
0:16:23 > 0:16:26"Dear, Agnes, people tell me my jokes aren't funny."
0:16:26 > 0:16:27Aww!
0:16:27 > 0:16:30"But I have to write a speech for my daughter's wedding,
0:16:30 > 0:16:33"what's a good line to get them started?"
0:16:33 > 0:16:35- That's it.- Try, erm...
0:16:35 > 0:16:37"A lot of people don't know this,
0:16:37 > 0:16:39"but she's adopted."
0:16:42 > 0:16:44Always gets them going! Always does.
0:16:46 > 0:16:49- What have you got?- Well, I've got one from Lynn Bisset.
0:16:49 > 0:16:52Oh, Limp Bizkit, my favourite band!
0:16:52 > 0:16:53Where are they?
0:16:53 > 0:16:56- Well, no, Lynn Bisset.- Oh, her.
0:16:56 > 0:16:58Where's Lynn? Where are you? Hello, Lynn. How are you?
0:16:58 > 0:17:00- Hi.- It's lovely to see you.
0:17:00 > 0:17:05She says, "Dear Agnes, my lovely cat Colin left me for another human.
0:17:05 > 0:17:09"What's even worse is that the other woman is my friend."
0:17:09 > 0:17:11- Oh.- "How do I get over this?"
0:17:11 > 0:17:12Yeah!
0:17:12 > 0:17:15Well, all I can say to you, Lynn, is it's not the first time
0:17:15 > 0:17:18somebody's friend was jealous of their pussy.
0:17:25 > 0:17:28Oh, God. Winnie, I have to go. I have to go.
0:17:28 > 0:17:31No, Aly's coming over to cook for Cathy's guests.
0:17:31 > 0:17:33- I have to go, go and meet him. - All right.- See you, love.
0:17:33 > 0:17:35- See you later.- Bye. - Bye, love. Bye-bye.
0:17:37 > 0:17:40Oh. Here's one we forgot to read.
0:17:40 > 0:17:41"Dear Agnes,
0:17:41 > 0:17:44"in an effort to jazz up our sex life,
0:17:44 > 0:17:47"I bought some sexy underwear.
0:17:47 > 0:17:53"When he came home, I stood there in a see-through negligee.
0:17:53 > 0:17:54"You could see me vest."
0:17:57 > 0:17:59Wait a minute. This is from me!
0:18:03 > 0:18:05APPLAUSE
0:18:08 > 0:18:11Ladies and gentlemen, Chef Aly!
0:18:13 > 0:18:16- Hello, Aly.- Hello, Mrs Brown.
0:18:16 > 0:18:17Reggae.
0:18:17 > 0:18:20MUSIC: Boombastic by Shaggy
0:18:27 > 0:18:29RECORD SCRATCHES OK.
0:18:29 > 0:18:30Enough fun.
0:18:30 > 0:18:32So, what are you cooking?
0:18:32 > 0:18:35- I'm cooking spicy tuna tomato pasta.- OK.
0:18:35 > 0:18:38Which is for Ashley Banjo, his mum, she used to cook for him,
0:18:38 > 0:18:40- this one, it's his favourite dish. - Oh, lovely.
0:18:40 > 0:18:42But I'm doing some twist in it, I'm doing like fresh tuna
0:18:42 > 0:18:45and I sear the tuna and the fresh pasta...
0:18:45 > 0:18:47- Fresh tuna?- Yeah. - For you at home, if...
0:18:47 > 0:18:49- For you at home... Sorry. - No, no, please go ahead.
0:18:51 > 0:18:53For you at home, you can use a tin of tuna,
0:18:53 > 0:18:55- it will do the same job. - Yeah, there you go.
0:18:57 > 0:19:00Join us next week, meet our new chef.
0:19:00 > 0:19:03APPLAUSE
0:19:03 > 0:19:05Now, we have one prepared that you've done earlier.
0:19:05 > 0:19:08Have a look, have a look at this.
0:19:08 > 0:19:10AUDIENCE OOHS
0:19:12 > 0:19:14Reggae!
0:19:14 > 0:19:17MUSIC: Boombastic by Shaggy
0:19:23 > 0:19:25RECORD SCRATCHES OK!
0:19:25 > 0:19:26The dancing chef.
0:19:26 > 0:19:29So, are you getting all your ingredients together?
0:19:29 > 0:19:31I have to go, Cathy's show is about to start
0:19:31 > 0:19:32so I'll leave it with you, good luck.
0:19:32 > 0:19:34Aly, make sure this kitchen's clean when you leave.
0:19:34 > 0:19:36It was dirty when I came here.
0:19:41 > 0:19:45- Well, it will be clean when you leave.- OK.
0:19:45 > 0:19:47APPLAUSE
0:19:47 > 0:19:52Five, four, three, two, one.
0:19:52 > 0:19:53Cue Cathy.
0:19:53 > 0:19:55# Time to go Here we go
0:19:55 > 0:19:58# The Cathy Brown Show. #
0:19:58 > 0:20:02Hello there again and welcome to The Cathy Brown Show,
0:20:02 > 0:20:04with me, Cathy Brown...
0:20:04 > 0:20:06- Me.- ..and Mammy.
0:20:06 > 0:20:09I'm giving you my inside scoop on the world of showbiz.
0:20:09 > 0:20:13Please welcome the fantastically funny Sue Perkins
0:20:13 > 0:20:16and dancing superstar Ashley Banjo.
0:20:16 > 0:20:19APPLAUSE AND CHEERING
0:20:25 > 0:20:27Hi.
0:20:27 > 0:20:29- Hi, Ashley, how are you? - How are you?- Very good.
0:20:31 > 0:20:33Come on, jump, jump!
0:20:38 > 0:20:41Mammy. Sit down.
0:20:41 > 0:20:43Oh, I haven't had a big jump like that in a long time.
0:20:46 > 0:20:49APPLAUSE AND CHEERING
0:20:51 > 0:20:53- Beautiful.- It's for you.
0:20:53 > 0:20:55Buster, what the hell are you dressed like that for?
0:20:55 > 0:20:57It's for Sue. It's my showstopper.
0:20:59 > 0:21:02Buster, nobody wants to see your showstopper, OK?
0:21:02 > 0:21:05AUDIENCE AWWS
0:21:05 > 0:21:06Buster.
0:21:06 > 0:21:09Maybe if you had a cherry on the top of it, it would work.
0:21:12 > 0:21:15FANFARE, APPLAUSE AND CHEERING
0:21:19 > 0:21:21Well, welcome to the show, both of you.
0:21:21 > 0:21:23- Lovely to be on the show.- Great to have you here.- Yeah, it is.
0:21:23 > 0:21:26We can feel each other's nerves.
0:21:26 > 0:21:28The size of him - from here, I can feel more than his neck.
0:21:31 > 0:21:33OK, settle down, Mammy.
0:21:33 > 0:21:36Now, Ashley, at the moment, you're teaching male celebrities
0:21:36 > 0:21:39to dance in a new show, The Real Full Monty.
0:21:39 > 0:21:41- I am.- Tell us about that.
0:21:41 > 0:21:45I'm teaching a group of male celebrities to dance and strip.
0:21:45 > 0:21:47- Oh.- Ooh!- Oh, right.- Yeah.
0:21:47 > 0:21:49Get me a ticket for that.
0:21:49 > 0:21:51It's all for a good cause, it's all to raise awareness
0:21:51 > 0:21:54for men's cancers because men just don't talk about it, you know.
0:21:54 > 0:21:57They say, "Mine is bigger than yours," but they won't do it.
0:21:57 > 0:21:59- Yeah, yeah! - They don't meet each other, go,
0:21:59 > 0:22:02- "How's things? How's your prostate?"- Yeah, they don't.
0:22:02 > 0:22:03This is about taking a group of men,
0:22:03 > 0:22:05putting them out of their comfort zone
0:22:05 > 0:22:08and celebrating the 20th anniversary of The Full Monty all in one go.
0:22:08 > 0:22:10Are you actually taking part in it as well?
0:22:10 > 0:22:12Well, you'll have to wait and see.
0:22:12 > 0:22:14I would, I'd personally give money for that.
0:22:14 > 0:22:17- That's... - She would give money for that!
0:22:17 > 0:22:19To see any cock, for God's sake!
0:22:20 > 0:22:22APPLAUSE
0:22:22 > 0:22:24- Mammy!- It's for charity.- Please.
0:22:24 > 0:22:27- It is for charity.- For charity. It's for charity.
0:22:27 > 0:22:29Sue, tell us about your Ganges documentary.
0:22:29 > 0:22:32- A couple of years ago, I went up the Mekong River.- OK.
0:22:32 > 0:22:35And I went from the mouth of it in Vietnam,
0:22:35 > 0:22:36all the way to the top of it in Tibet
0:22:36 > 0:22:39and this time I'm doing the Ganges River.
0:22:39 > 0:22:40Basically, the BBC are trying to kill me.
0:22:40 > 0:22:43They're trying to make sure I go to very far away places...
0:22:43 > 0:22:44- MRS BROWN SNORES - ..and... Yep.
0:22:47 > 0:22:48Ashley Banjo!
0:22:49 > 0:22:51- I'm here!- Yeah.
0:22:51 > 0:22:52- This is from your documentary, is it?- Oh!
0:22:52 > 0:22:54Er, yes.
0:22:54 > 0:22:58That's Baba Ramdev, he's a billionaire monk.
0:22:58 > 0:22:59- Wow.- Yeah.
0:22:59 > 0:23:02He's quite heavily armed, that was quite a nervous photograph for me,
0:23:02 > 0:23:05cos there was no underwear there and a machinegun there
0:23:05 > 0:23:09and that, for me, is a very frightening sandwich.
0:23:09 > 0:23:11- Can I just do a little...? - A little what?
0:23:11 > 0:23:14- Question.- Oh, no, Mammy, please. We discussed this, no.
0:23:14 > 0:23:16- I just want to do a question. - No, Mammy.
0:23:16 > 0:23:17- Oh, come on.- Oh, go on.
0:23:17 > 0:23:20- Right. Er, Banjo.- Yes.
0:23:20 > 0:23:21Ashley is his name, Mammy.
0:23:21 > 0:23:23Banjo's all right, Banjo's all right.
0:23:23 > 0:23:25Did you have a nickname when you were younger?
0:23:25 > 0:23:27Banjo, a lot of people called me Banjo.
0:23:27 > 0:23:29- So, yeah, there you go.- Ah-ha!
0:23:30 > 0:23:32Does being so supple...
0:23:33 > 0:23:37..mean that there are sexual positions that you have invented?
0:23:39 > 0:23:40Stop it!
0:23:40 > 0:23:42APPLAUSE
0:23:42 > 0:23:44Seriously.
0:23:44 > 0:23:46- I'm sorry, Ashley.- That's all right.
0:23:46 > 0:23:47Ashley...
0:23:49 > 0:23:51- Mammy.- Doing the banjo.- Oh, yes.- Oh.
0:23:51 > 0:23:53How's your banjo?
0:23:55 > 0:23:57- Intact.- Thank you for that, Mammy. - No problem.
0:23:57 > 0:24:00- Yes.- Sue, you've worked with the children recently
0:24:00 > 0:24:02on the spelling bee, The Big Spell.
0:24:02 > 0:24:05- I cried every time one of them went out.- Oh!- Sobbed.
0:24:05 > 0:24:07- It must've been heartbreaking. - Yes, that would be a shame.
0:24:07 > 0:24:09- Sobbed.- How do you comfort a child
0:24:09 > 0:24:11who doesn't know how to spell blancmange?
0:24:11 > 0:24:14Emotionally, I'm sort of younger than they are. They're nine.
0:24:14 > 0:24:17Sorry, I'm just trying to work out how to... I can't spell blancmange.
0:24:17 > 0:24:19"Blanc mange."
0:24:19 > 0:24:21- Blanc mange.- Blanc mange.
0:24:21 > 0:24:23Ashley, you've talked a lot about inspiring
0:24:23 > 0:24:26- the next generation of dancers.- Yes.
0:24:26 > 0:24:28For me, you know, Diversity's motto's dream, believe, achieve
0:24:28 > 0:24:29and we talk about inspiring kids
0:24:29 > 0:24:31and some people just think it's a bit cliche.
0:24:31 > 0:24:34- What's your motto again? - Dream, believe, achieve.
0:24:34 > 0:24:36- That's Diversity's motto. - Can you say it a bit slower, love?
0:24:36 > 0:24:39- Dream...- No, it sounded like cream cheese to me there.
0:24:39 > 0:24:42- No. Dream, believe, achieve. - Dream...- Three words.
0:24:42 > 0:24:45- Believe...- Believe, achieve.
0:24:45 > 0:24:47And he can't spell bucking blancmange.
0:24:47 > 0:24:49Sue, do you have any motto you live by?
0:24:49 > 0:24:53Yes, my main motto is if it's head height or below, I'll eat it.
0:24:55 > 0:24:58My motto is it's only the hair on the gooseberry
0:24:58 > 0:24:59that stops it from being a grape.
0:25:01 > 0:25:03So shave your groceries.
0:25:04 > 0:25:07Ashley, is it true that you could teach anyone to dance?
0:25:07 > 0:25:10I said that once and it's kind of stuck with me but I do believe it,
0:25:10 > 0:25:12- I believe that everybody and anybody can do it.- Really?
0:25:12 > 0:25:15- Mm-hm.- Really? If you can get that big lump to dance,
0:25:15 > 0:25:19I will personally do a bucking backflip.
0:25:19 > 0:25:21So if I can get him to dance, you'll do a backflip?
0:25:21 > 0:25:24- Well, that sounds like a challenge I want to see.- No...
0:25:24 > 0:25:26APPLAUSE
0:25:27 > 0:25:30It was an offhand remark, all right?
0:25:30 > 0:25:32Go on, Ashley, off you go. Wake Grandad up, Mammy.
0:25:32 > 0:25:35- Grandad!- Grandad.- What? - This is Ashley.
0:25:35 > 0:25:38He's going to teach you how to dance. Stand up.
0:25:38 > 0:25:41Stand up, come on. Up you get.
0:25:41 > 0:25:43- This should be good. - So what you're going to do is,
0:25:43 > 0:25:45you're going to step to the side, we're going to take it old school
0:25:45 > 0:25:48- like this, and we're going to click. - ASHLEY CLICKS
0:25:48 > 0:25:50- GRANDAD CLICKS SILENTLY - That's it, yeah.
0:25:50 > 0:25:54And now we're going to step to the left and we're going to click.
0:25:54 > 0:25:56And then we're going to add some style.
0:25:56 > 0:25:57Oh, smooth.
0:26:00 > 0:26:02AUDIENCE OOHS AND APPLAUDS
0:26:02 > 0:26:05Hold on, hold on. Wait a minute, wait a minute.
0:26:05 > 0:26:07Have we music? Do it on your own.
0:26:07 > 0:26:11MUSIC: You Should Be Dancing by Bee Gees
0:26:11 > 0:26:13Oh!
0:26:21 > 0:26:23Oh, yes. Let's go. Click, click!
0:26:27 > 0:26:29- RECORD SCRATCHES - Well...
0:26:29 > 0:26:31APPLAUSE AND CHEERING
0:26:33 > 0:26:37He's a man who can't put a teabag into a bucking mug!
0:26:37 > 0:26:39Well, Mammy, a bet's a bet.
0:26:39 > 0:26:41- You're going to have to do the backflip.- No...
0:26:41 > 0:26:43But first of all, you know that every week
0:26:43 > 0:26:47- we welcome one of the guest's own mammies onto the show.- Oh, yes.
0:26:47 > 0:26:50And this week we have Ashley's mammy.
0:26:50 > 0:26:52Will you welcome Dani?
0:26:52 > 0:26:54APPLAUSE AND CHEERING
0:27:09 > 0:27:10Hello!
0:27:12 > 0:27:15My God, you couldn't be his mother.
0:27:15 > 0:27:17- You look far too young. - There you go, Mum.- Thank you.
0:27:17 > 0:27:20See, see? Look, moisturise, moisturise.
0:27:24 > 0:27:27- Dani, you're very welcome. - Yes, you are.
0:27:27 > 0:27:31We're delighted to have you with us. You must be a very, very proud mum.
0:27:31 > 0:27:33- Mm.- I am.- Yes.
0:27:33 > 0:27:35Not just because of Ashley.
0:27:35 > 0:27:37No, not at all. Obviously...
0:27:37 > 0:27:39Oh, sorry!
0:27:39 > 0:27:41I am.
0:27:41 > 0:27:43You were a dancer yourself back in the day
0:27:43 > 0:27:45so did that make you a pushy mum?
0:27:45 > 0:27:46No.
0:27:46 > 0:27:49- Oh!- No.- No, she was not a pushy mum. - No, no, no.
0:27:49 > 0:27:51He didn't even really go into the studio
0:27:51 > 0:27:55and it was just one Sunday, his nan couldn't look after him
0:27:55 > 0:27:57so I said, "Well, you'll have to stay home, then, you can't come."
0:27:57 > 0:28:01And the next day, bang, he was in the studio and he didn't stop...
0:28:01 > 0:28:04- SUE:- So it was love at first sight, as soon as you started moving.
0:28:04 > 0:28:05Dani, are you happy teaching dancing
0:28:05 > 0:28:08or do you miss actually dancing yourself?
0:28:08 > 0:28:12- DANI:- Yeah, I still sort of, you know, dip in and out of teaching
0:28:12 > 0:28:14and putting the kids through their paces.
0:28:14 > 0:28:17Oh, my God. I'll say what you can't say.
0:28:17 > 0:28:19- Crazy.- Is she a bully?
0:28:19 > 0:28:22- It's like... - No, that's terrible to say!
0:28:22 > 0:28:23Our studios are next door, right?
0:28:23 > 0:28:26Our studios are next door to each other so every now and again,
0:28:26 > 0:28:28I'll pause the music, be like, "Right, good rehearsal, boys,"
0:28:28 > 0:28:31and just through the wall, just slightly, you just hear...
0:28:31 > 0:28:33HE MIMICS GARBLED SHOUTING
0:28:33 > 0:28:35"What are you doing? Leg up the wall!"
0:28:35 > 0:28:37- You're like, "Whoa..." - SUE:- Leg up the wall?
0:28:37 > 0:28:40- Yeah, she splits up the wall, yeah. - DANI:- It's good anger management.
0:28:40 > 0:28:42Was your mam pushy, Sue, about getting you into showbiz?
0:28:42 > 0:28:45- SUE:- No, well, they sold cars for a living.
0:28:45 > 0:28:47- OK.- They sold second-hand cars. - Same thing.
0:28:47 > 0:28:49- Oh, my dad sells cars.- Really?- Yeah.
0:28:49 > 0:28:50So, I mean, they might've pushed me into that.
0:28:50 > 0:28:53But it's the same sort of thing I do, really, it's, you know...
0:28:53 > 0:28:56- I think we have a photograph of you when you were a child.- Oh.
0:28:57 > 0:29:00- Yes.- Where did you get the fringe? AUDIENCE AWWS
0:29:00 > 0:29:02I don't know why people are saying "aww".
0:29:02 > 0:29:04That's a cry for help, that fringe.
0:29:04 > 0:29:06- All my family had hair like that. - Wow.
0:29:06 > 0:29:09- From the age of about four to about 16 and we never knew why.- Wow.
0:29:09 > 0:29:12And then it transpired that the lady who came round on a Sunday
0:29:12 > 0:29:16to cut our hair was a dog groomer and...
0:29:17 > 0:29:20Watch Crufts, you'll see the same sort of sleek line
0:29:20 > 0:29:22on a Pekingese.
0:29:22 > 0:29:24It's really sinister, isn't it?
0:29:24 > 0:29:26Come on, fetch, fetch, fetch!
0:29:28 > 0:29:31What age were you when you...? I know this is a...
0:29:31 > 0:29:33When I realised I didn't want to sell used cars?
0:29:33 > 0:29:35- No.- I was this old.
0:29:35 > 0:29:37When you twigged, "Gosh, I might be funny here"?
0:29:37 > 0:29:40Oh, no, that's still, that's still yet to come.
0:29:40 > 0:29:43Oh, no, it's... Just in case anybody who doesn't know,
0:29:43 > 0:29:46you wrote French And Saunders, you wrote Ab Fab,
0:29:46 > 0:29:49you wrote for... I mean, you're one of the funniest writers
0:29:49 > 0:29:51I've ever seen in my... Like, you're funny.
0:29:51 > 0:29:53APPLAUSE
0:29:55 > 0:29:58It's only when you're with Mel that you're not funny.
0:30:00 > 0:30:03Dani, tell us, was Ashley a bit of a ladies' man growing up?
0:30:03 > 0:30:06Well, no - he had lots of girls as friends, but...
0:30:06 > 0:30:08- I was friendzoned a lot.- Yes.
0:30:08 > 0:30:10Would you like to be my Cathy's friend?
0:30:10 > 0:30:12No, Mammy!
0:30:12 > 0:30:15She has no friends, if you'd like to be her friend?
0:30:15 > 0:30:17Mammy, Ashley is married.
0:30:17 > 0:30:19(He's going to take his cock out.)
0:30:19 > 0:30:20Stop...!
0:30:22 > 0:30:24Seriously!
0:30:24 > 0:30:26(Don't look a gift horse in the mouth.)
0:30:27 > 0:30:32Mammy, why don't you go and see how Chef Aly is doing with the cooking?
0:30:32 > 0:30:33Fine. Dani, you come with me.
0:30:33 > 0:30:36- She obviously doesn't want us. - See you in a bit.- No, just you.
0:30:36 > 0:30:37Bitch.
0:30:37 > 0:30:39Not you, not you!
0:30:39 > 0:30:42Come on, Dani, come on inside. We'll talk one-to-one.
0:30:42 > 0:30:45My God, you're as tall as he is.
0:30:45 > 0:30:48Come here, come here and talk to me. You were in the Royal Ballet.
0:30:48 > 0:30:51Well, I outgrew the ballet when I was about ten, clearly,
0:30:51 > 0:30:53cos I could lift the guys.
0:30:53 > 0:30:55- You can't be tall and be a ballerina?- No, no.
0:30:55 > 0:30:57About 5' 3", 5' 5"...
0:30:57 > 0:31:00Well, if you're responsible for anything that Ashley does,
0:31:00 > 0:31:03you must be an amazing trainer, because he's an amazing dancer.
0:31:03 > 0:31:05- Oh, thank you. - He really is incredible.
0:31:05 > 0:31:06I've got some photographs, here.
0:31:06 > 0:31:09Look at it. Have a look at that.
0:31:09 > 0:31:11- See, in the middle, there? AUDIENCE:- Aw!
0:31:11 > 0:31:14I think that's your daughter in the tutu, is it?
0:31:14 > 0:31:15No, that's Ashley.
0:31:15 > 0:31:17LAUGHTER
0:31:20 > 0:31:23That was his first big performance at school,
0:31:23 > 0:31:25doing Swan Lake, in welly boots and...
0:31:25 > 0:31:27I know, I was a bad mum.
0:31:28 > 0:31:31Ladies and gentlemen, for those of you that are wondering,
0:31:31 > 0:31:33this will be the poster for...
0:31:35 > 0:31:36..The Full Monty.
0:31:36 > 0:31:39And again, never mind the towel,
0:31:39 > 0:31:43I point to the towel on the head.
0:31:43 > 0:31:45And a tutu.
0:31:45 > 0:31:47This is when he was really shy. You wouldn't believe.
0:31:47 > 0:31:49- So he was a quiet child? - He was. Yeah.
0:31:49 > 0:31:52I don't know where he gets that from.
0:31:52 > 0:31:54SHE LAUGHS
0:31:54 > 0:31:56Come on over and let's see what Aly's doing, here.
0:31:56 > 0:31:58It sounds like he's poisoning us.
0:31:58 > 0:32:00Now, Aly, this is Dani. Dani, this is Aly.
0:32:00 > 0:32:03- Hello, Dani. Nice to meet you. - Lovely to meet you. Hello.
0:32:03 > 0:32:06- We're doing a nice tuna pasta, spicy tuna pasta.- Oh, wow.
0:32:06 > 0:32:09- But this is fresh tuna.- OK.
0:32:09 > 0:32:10- And this is fresh pasta?- Yes.
0:32:10 > 0:32:13- Look at this, look. - That's a pasta machine.
0:32:13 > 0:32:15That would be handy for drying socks on.
0:32:15 > 0:32:18- I'm taking with me this one. - Hold on, uh...
0:32:18 > 0:32:20- Whoa, whoa, whoa... - Whoa, whoa, whoa, chef, now.
0:32:20 > 0:32:22- Let's you and me do a bit of... - Mrs Brown, this is...
0:32:22 > 0:32:24I won't hurt your knob.
0:32:26 > 0:32:30You feed it into this one, here, and I'll turn the handle.
0:32:30 > 0:32:32- There you go. - Now, now, now...
0:32:32 > 0:32:36- There you go.- Look at this, look at this, look at this.
0:32:36 > 0:32:37My God.
0:32:37 > 0:32:39Yeah! CHEERING
0:32:39 > 0:32:42They're my rastas... Reggae!
0:32:42 > 0:32:45MUSIC: Mr Boombastic by Shaggy
0:32:53 > 0:32:55RECORD SCRATCHES
0:32:55 > 0:32:58For all of you that don't know at home,
0:32:58 > 0:33:00the best way to try and see if spaghetti is cooked
0:33:00 > 0:33:02is to throw it at the wall.
0:33:05 > 0:33:08Right, so, that's not cooked, yet. So I tell you what we'll do.
0:33:08 > 0:33:10Why don't we leave Aly with his dish?
0:33:10 > 0:33:13We have to go, we'll go inside and see what they're doing,
0:33:13 > 0:33:15- Bye-bye, Aly.- Thank you. Bye.
0:33:15 > 0:33:17Come on, Dani, let's go.
0:33:17 > 0:33:19He is a very... He's a very emotional chef.
0:33:21 > 0:33:22Welcome back.
0:33:24 > 0:33:26Mammy, I don't think any of us have forgotten
0:33:26 > 0:33:28that you made a bet earlier on.
0:33:28 > 0:33:30Oh, hang on, I think I hear Aly calling.
0:33:30 > 0:33:32No, Mammy.
0:33:32 > 0:33:34Are we going to see this backflip or not?
0:33:34 > 0:33:36- SHOUTS OF ENCOURAGEMENT - Come on.- Come on.
0:33:36 > 0:33:38APPLAUSE
0:33:42 > 0:33:44DRUM ROLL
0:33:49 > 0:33:51WHOOPING
0:33:59 > 0:34:03- You can do this.- Come on. - Come on, Mammy, come on!
0:34:03 > 0:34:05DRUM ROLL AND CHEERING
0:34:08 > 0:34:11CYMBALS CLASH
0:34:15 > 0:34:18- Did I spin?- Yes.- Yes, yes.- Almost.
0:34:18 > 0:34:20- You did, well done!- Thank you!
0:34:20 > 0:34:24Well done, it was good, it was good, it was good.
0:34:24 > 0:34:27Well done, Mammy.
0:34:27 > 0:34:30I think you should see what Chef Aly has cooked for everybody.
0:34:30 > 0:34:32Oh, look at this - this is the surprise dish.
0:34:32 > 0:34:34OOHING
0:34:34 > 0:34:37- My mum is going to love that. - Me, too.
0:34:38 > 0:34:41- Now...- OK.
0:34:41 > 0:34:44Oh, my God, Chef Aly - well done.
0:34:44 > 0:34:46APPLAUSE
0:34:46 > 0:34:47So, tell us, what have we got here, Aly?
0:34:47 > 0:34:50We've got a surprise dish, which is lemon meringue.
0:34:50 > 0:34:53- I love lemon.- And we've got Ashley's favourite pasta,
0:34:53 > 0:34:55which is spicy tuna pasta.
0:34:55 > 0:34:57Yours didn't look quite like that, Mum.
0:34:57 > 0:34:58I'm sure it looked like that.
0:34:58 > 0:35:00Yeah, yours... Yeah.
0:35:00 > 0:35:02You dish up and I'll just get some lemon meringue pie.
0:35:02 > 0:35:05Would anyone in the audience like to try lemon meringue pie?
0:35:05 > 0:35:07- AUDIENCE:- Yes! - Let me look, let me have a look.
0:35:07 > 0:35:09Let me... Do you want to go...?
0:35:09 > 0:35:12I saw a woman up the back, waving, there.
0:35:16 > 0:35:18Here you go.
0:35:18 > 0:35:19One.
0:35:22 > 0:35:234.99.
0:35:25 > 0:35:28Looks beautiful, doesn't it? Looks beautiful.
0:35:28 > 0:35:29Excuse me, excuse me.
0:35:31 > 0:35:33Excuse me, excuse me.
0:35:40 > 0:35:42Would you like to try some?
0:35:44 > 0:35:46Thank you.
0:35:46 > 0:35:48Fuck. I have to go back.
0:35:48 > 0:35:51Would you like to try that?
0:35:51 > 0:35:53Thank you very much, yes, very nice.
0:35:54 > 0:35:56WHOOPING
0:35:56 > 0:35:58CRASHING
0:35:58 > 0:36:02So, what's the verdict? What do you think, Dani?
0:36:02 > 0:36:05- Delicious.- Is it?- Absolutely. Very different to mine.
0:36:05 > 0:36:07- I need the recipe. - Thank you very much.
0:36:07 > 0:36:08And Ashley?
0:36:08 > 0:36:10- My mum's is just as good. - AUDIENCE: Aw!
0:36:10 > 0:36:12APPLAUSE
0:36:15 > 0:36:17OK?
0:36:17 > 0:36:20That's all we have time for on The Cathy Brown Show.
0:36:20 > 0:36:21Thank God.
0:36:23 > 0:36:27A huge thanks to all my guests tonight - Sue Perkins...
0:36:29 > 0:36:31..Ashley Banjo...
0:36:33 > 0:36:34..and Mammy, Dani...
0:36:36 > 0:36:38..and, of course, Chef Aly.
0:36:38 > 0:36:40CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:36:40 > 0:36:42Join Cathy next week, when her guests will be
0:36:42 > 0:36:43Austin Powers
0:36:43 > 0:36:45and Judi Dench's dog's mother.
0:36:47 > 0:36:49- No, they won't, Mammy. - Maybe. Maybe they will.
0:36:49 > 0:36:51- Mammy!- It might be.- Mammy!
0:36:53 > 0:36:54We'll see you soon.
0:36:54 > 0:36:58But, for now, it's Father Damien and Trevor with Thought For The Day,
0:36:58 > 0:37:00so it's over to St Jarlath's Church.
0:37:00 > 0:37:02- Good night, everybody.- Good night.
0:37:02 > 0:37:04APPLAUSE
0:37:04 > 0:37:06ORGAN PLAYS
0:37:09 > 0:37:11- Hello there.- Hi.
0:37:11 > 0:37:14Tonight, I'd like to talk to you about choirs.
0:37:14 > 0:37:17Homosexuals are welcome in the church.
0:37:18 > 0:37:19CHOIRS.
0:37:19 > 0:37:21Oh...
0:37:22 > 0:37:23If you know anybody that is in a choir,
0:37:23 > 0:37:25or maybe you're a member of one,
0:37:25 > 0:37:28you'll see that it is made up of very different people.
0:37:28 > 0:37:31- The butcher, the baker, the milkman. - Exactly.
0:37:31 > 0:37:34Builder, carpenter, the taxi driver with the funny eye.
0:37:34 > 0:37:37- They get the point, Damien.- Great.
0:37:37 > 0:37:39Regardless of what they do for a living...
0:37:39 > 0:37:41..or who they love...
0:37:41 > 0:37:44..the point is that once the choirmaster
0:37:44 > 0:37:45takes out his baton...
0:37:45 > 0:37:47FATHER DAMIEN SNIGGERS
0:37:47 > 0:37:49Takes out his baton...!
0:37:49 > 0:37:52..they all have the same goal.
0:37:52 > 0:37:55Get finished as quick as possible and get out for a pint.
0:37:55 > 0:37:56No, Damien.
0:37:56 > 0:37:57Harmony.
0:37:57 > 0:37:59A choir is a great example
0:37:59 > 0:38:01of how many people from different backgrounds
0:38:01 > 0:38:05can bring their own unique voice to create harmony.
0:38:05 > 0:38:08So, don't be afraid to add your voice.
0:38:08 > 0:38:09Be yourself, speak up,
0:38:09 > 0:38:12and join in the harmony of God's life.
0:38:12 > 0:38:14# The harmony of God's life...! #
0:38:14 > 0:38:15Stop.
0:38:15 > 0:38:18HE IMITATES DRUMMER
0:38:18 > 0:38:19Good night.
0:38:19 > 0:38:20Yo!
0:38:20 > 0:38:22APPLAUSE
0:38:25 > 0:38:27You know...
0:38:27 > 0:38:30It's funny, being a mother, you know,
0:38:30 > 0:38:31right from the start to the end.
0:38:31 > 0:38:33From the very moment that...
0:38:33 > 0:38:35I remembered me and my first time, lying there,
0:38:35 > 0:38:38and he's standing beside me and I'm going...
0:38:38 > 0:38:40STRAINED: "Ye-e-eagh!
0:38:40 > 0:38:41"Y-Y-Y-AARGH!
0:38:41 > 0:38:44"You baldy little bastard!"
0:38:46 > 0:38:47And that was the conception.
0:38:51 > 0:38:52And then the...
0:38:52 > 0:38:55And then you take them to school, and then they grow up,
0:38:55 > 0:38:57and, you know, you think you want them out of the house,
0:38:57 > 0:38:59and then they go, and, just... Life's not fair, I suppose.
0:38:59 > 0:39:02But if I mean, it wouldn't be fair, for example, if...
0:39:02 > 0:39:05Say, if you were a mother and you were to give one child of your children pocket money,
0:39:05 > 0:39:07and not the other one, that wouldn't be fair, would it?
0:39:07 > 0:39:09- AUDIENCE:- No. - No, it wouldn't.
0:39:09 > 0:39:11Sure, it wouldn't, Christina Cooper? Sure it wouldn't?
0:39:11 > 0:39:12SHE GASPS
0:39:12 > 0:39:14LAUGHTER
0:39:14 > 0:39:16Yes, Christina Cooper, you are Mammy of the Week.
0:39:16 > 0:39:18Christina Cooper!
0:39:18 > 0:39:20CHEERING AND APPLAUSE Come on, come down.
0:39:33 > 0:39:36Every week, we're going to award a fine mammy with this -
0:39:36 > 0:39:38the Mammy Award.
0:39:38 > 0:39:39You've been nominated by your daughters,
0:39:39 > 0:39:41Bianca and Stephanie,
0:39:41 > 0:39:42who are sitting up there - look at them.
0:39:42 > 0:39:44They wanted you to be Mammy of the Week,
0:39:44 > 0:39:46and if you're wondering why, have a look at this.
0:39:50 > 0:39:52Hi, Mum, surprise!
0:39:52 > 0:39:54I've nominated you to be Mammy of the Week,
0:39:54 > 0:39:56because you are an amazing mum.
0:39:56 > 0:39:59But...you do have some flaws.
0:40:06 > 0:40:08Mum is so nosy.
0:40:08 > 0:40:10She walks the dogs a particular route
0:40:10 > 0:40:13just so she can have a nosy at other people's houses.
0:40:13 > 0:40:16She's always opening me and my sister's post.
0:40:16 > 0:40:17"Accidentally."
0:40:17 > 0:40:19It has to stop.
0:40:19 > 0:40:21She tells the whole world what me and Bianca are up to
0:40:21 > 0:40:24on her Facebook page, without even asking.
0:40:26 > 0:40:28Mum has this really weird habit.
0:40:28 > 0:40:30When she is pouring her daily juice,
0:40:30 > 0:40:32she clenches her bum cheeks
0:40:32 > 0:40:35to the rhythm of the juice glugging out of the carton.
0:40:35 > 0:40:37SHE GLUGS
0:40:42 > 0:40:44When we're ill, she won't go anywhere near us.
0:40:44 > 0:40:46How's that for parenting?!
0:40:48 > 0:40:51So, she claims she used to be a model for Rolls-Royce.
0:40:51 > 0:40:53We're not convinced.
0:40:55 > 0:40:57Mum, despite all these flaws,
0:40:57 > 0:40:58you truly are an amazing person.
0:40:58 > 0:41:01And we don't know what we'd do without you.
0:41:05 > 0:41:08CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:41:11 > 0:41:12CHRISTINA LAUGHS
0:41:13 > 0:41:18I don't care about anything else that was in that whole video...
0:41:18 > 0:41:19Turn around.
0:41:20 > 0:41:23OK, you do your butt cheeks.
0:41:23 > 0:41:26# Shake, baby, shake
0:41:26 > 0:41:28# I said shake, baby, shake... #
0:41:28 > 0:41:30APPLAUSE
0:41:34 > 0:41:36Tell me about your dogs.
0:41:36 > 0:41:37Oh, my dogs.
0:41:37 > 0:41:39Maisie and Keira.
0:41:39 > 0:41:41- Maisie and Keira.- Yeah.
0:41:41 > 0:41:43The girls kind of think you might love the dogs
0:41:43 > 0:41:45more than you love them.
0:41:45 > 0:41:46I do love my dogs, yeah.
0:41:46 > 0:41:49I love my girls, too, but I do love my dogs.
0:41:49 > 0:41:51I don't blame you loving your girls.
0:41:51 > 0:41:53They obviously adore you. That's why you're Mammy of the Week.
0:41:53 > 0:41:55Now, would you like to come up to my boxroom
0:41:55 > 0:41:57and have a look at my box?
0:41:57 > 0:42:00- Yes.- A round of applause. Come on, let's go.
0:42:00 > 0:42:02APPLAUSE
0:42:02 > 0:42:03# It's going to make you float
0:42:03 > 0:42:05# It's going to rock your socks
0:42:05 > 0:42:06# When you see what's in
0:42:06 > 0:42:08# Mammy's Box. #
0:42:09 > 0:42:10Close that door.
0:42:13 > 0:42:16Those stairs kill me every time.
0:42:16 > 0:42:18Now, this is the way it works, Christina.
0:42:18 > 0:42:21As you can see, our three people are covered with prizes
0:42:21 > 0:42:23and they've got money, etc, etc.
0:42:23 > 0:42:26Now, you get to pick one to flick off,
0:42:26 > 0:42:28and whenever you flick off, you win.
0:42:28 > 0:42:31There is a star prize in there, which is the key to my box.
0:42:31 > 0:42:33Oh...
0:42:33 > 0:42:37I have to tell you, it's very rare that anyone gets the key to my box.
0:42:37 > 0:42:39So, you flick off as much as you possibly can.
0:42:39 > 0:42:40Now, you can pick any one of them.
0:42:40 > 0:42:46You can pick Father Damien, who's lovely, my son, or Buster.
0:42:46 > 0:42:49So, that's Damien, him, or Buster.
0:42:49 > 0:42:51Have a think, now, have a think.
0:42:51 > 0:42:54Actually, do you know what? Why don't we do all three?
0:42:54 > 0:42:57- Yes.- Yeah! - Here's what's going to happen.
0:42:57 > 0:42:59Buster... Buster...
0:42:59 > 0:43:00They weren't expecting this.
0:43:03 > 0:43:04Stand up, stand up!
0:43:04 > 0:43:08You get one of Mrs Brown's tea towels to do this
0:43:08 > 0:43:11and you knock off as much as you can.
0:43:11 > 0:43:12I really mean...
0:43:12 > 0:43:14WHOOPING
0:43:14 > 0:43:17Now, me and Christina have been talking...
0:43:18 > 0:43:22..and Christina's mother is of Irish descent.
0:43:22 > 0:43:25And where normal people use a tea towel like that,
0:43:25 > 0:43:26Irish mothers don't.
0:43:26 > 0:43:28They do that. WHIPPING SOUND
0:43:28 > 0:43:29Oh, yes!
0:43:29 > 0:43:31My mother could slice a pan.
0:43:33 > 0:43:35So, when I say go, the time starts,
0:43:35 > 0:43:38and keep going until you hear my bong.
0:43:38 > 0:43:39Your time starts...
0:43:39 > 0:43:42Now. Go.
0:43:42 > 0:43:44SHOUTS OF ENCOURAGEMENT
0:44:01 > 0:44:03GONG REVERBERATES
0:44:03 > 0:44:05CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:44:07 > 0:44:08Hey, hey, hey!
0:44:09 > 0:44:11My calculations, they are all fivers,
0:44:11 > 0:44:15so you've won 283 Euro.
0:44:15 > 0:44:17LAUGHTER
0:44:20 > 0:44:22Now, get me up the stars, boys.
0:44:22 > 0:44:24Get me up the stars, we'll see what you've won.
0:44:24 > 0:44:26Let's have a look at the stars.
0:44:26 > 0:44:30There must be more stars than that, she's knocked off every fecker... Oh, there's one.
0:44:30 > 0:44:31I've never said this to a man before -
0:44:31 > 0:44:33here's your helmet back.
0:44:35 > 0:44:36So...a facial.
0:44:36 > 0:44:38OOHING You don't need that.
0:44:39 > 0:44:41- Oh, yeah. - Yes, they'll go well.
0:44:42 > 0:44:44- Oh, maybe.- Maybe.
0:44:46 > 0:44:48- Yeah, mm-hm. - What kind of tea do you like?
0:44:48 > 0:44:50- Prosecco.- Prosecco?
0:44:50 > 0:44:52LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE
0:44:54 > 0:44:56I'm not sure that comes in bags.
0:44:56 > 0:44:59Oh... And Mrs Brown's box key.
0:44:59 > 0:45:01FANFARE
0:45:03 > 0:45:05I need to go and get Mrs Brown's box.
0:45:11 > 0:45:14Now, come over and have a look at my box.
0:45:14 > 0:45:15Where's the key? Good girl.
0:45:15 > 0:45:18If it doesn't work, we can get Buster out to pick it.
0:45:19 > 0:45:20Oh, look, it's opened first time.
0:45:20 > 0:45:23I'll let you open the box, let's see what you've won.
0:45:23 > 0:45:24Open the box.
0:45:25 > 0:45:28Luxury doggie clothes!
0:45:28 > 0:45:30Whoa!
0:45:31 > 0:45:33Well done, well done.
0:45:33 > 0:45:35And, most important of all,
0:45:35 > 0:45:37she gets the Mammy of the Week Award.
0:45:37 > 0:45:38Aw!
0:45:38 > 0:45:41CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:45:41 > 0:45:43Now, while we're here,
0:45:43 > 0:45:45the boys can help tidy up.
0:45:45 > 0:45:47I have to go. I'll see you later.
0:45:47 > 0:45:49Bye!
0:46:01 > 0:46:03- Hi, Winnie.- You're late, Agnes.
0:46:03 > 0:46:06Aston Merrygold's going to be here any minute.
0:46:08 > 0:46:09Oh, he is!
0:46:13 > 0:46:15Come on...come on.
0:46:20 > 0:46:22- So good to have you back. - Thank you so much.
0:46:22 > 0:46:24I'm just after having a Slippery Nipple.
0:46:24 > 0:46:27- A what? - Do you fancy a Slippery Nipple?
0:46:30 > 0:46:34If you'd like one, she'll treat you to a Blow Job, won't you, Winnie?
0:46:34 > 0:46:36- Winnie is a huge fan, aren't you, Winnie?- I'm a huge fan.
0:46:36 > 0:46:38A huge fan. Look what she has - look, look.
0:46:38 > 0:46:42She has your disk and she has your Marigold gloves.
0:46:42 > 0:46:44Maybe you might sign the gloves.
0:46:44 > 0:46:47I'll sign the gloves. You know I'm Merrygold, though, right?
0:46:47 > 0:46:49- OK, it doesn't matter. - Just sign the bucking glove, son.
0:46:49 > 0:46:51- "To Winnie..."- "To Winnie..."
0:46:51 > 0:46:54- "Have a wonderful night..." - "Have a wonderful night..."
0:46:54 > 0:46:56"I'll perform for you, any time..."
0:46:56 > 0:46:58That's enough, Winnie, love.
0:46:58 > 0:46:59- "Anywhere."- "Anywhere", yeah.
0:46:59 > 0:47:02- "Wonderful..." - "And I'll do it free."
0:47:04 > 0:47:06It's not the first time you've signed a rubber, son.
0:47:06 > 0:47:09LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE
0:47:12 > 0:47:14So, who have you got with you? Who's with you?
0:47:14 > 0:47:17Um, Dwayne is here, and Jeff.
0:47:17 > 0:47:18Hello, Jeff.
0:47:18 > 0:47:20OOHING
0:47:20 > 0:47:22What's that little thing in Jeff's hand?
0:47:24 > 0:47:27- Oh, the ukulele. - Oh, he's going to strum his ukulele.
0:47:27 > 0:47:28- Yes.- Is he?
0:47:28 > 0:47:30Well, it's actually mine, but anyway...
0:47:30 > 0:47:32He's going to strum your ukulele.
0:47:32 > 0:47:35Hey, we all have to do things to keep our job.
0:47:36 > 0:47:38If it means strumming your ukulele, away you go.
0:47:38 > 0:47:39Oh!
0:47:42 > 0:47:45- Now, why don't you...?- I've got to sing the high bit, now, as well...
0:47:45 > 0:47:47Oh, yes, you do! No problem.
0:47:47 > 0:47:49Would you sing me one of my favourites,
0:47:49 > 0:47:50one of my all-time favourites?
0:47:50 > 0:47:52- Of course. - What are you going to sing for me?
0:47:52 > 0:47:55You're Just Too Good To Be True, I suppose that works.
0:47:55 > 0:47:56WINNIE SNORTS WITH LAUGHTER
0:47:56 > 0:47:57Fuck off, Winnie!
0:47:59 > 0:48:00- Can I start?- Oh, yes, please.
0:48:04 > 0:48:05LAUGHTER
0:48:09 > 0:48:12It's hard when you're looking right at me as well.
0:48:19 > 0:48:23# You're just too good to be true
0:48:23 > 0:48:26# Can't take my eyes off of you... #
0:48:26 > 0:48:27Who can blame you?
0:48:29 > 0:48:32# You feel like heaven to touch
0:48:39 > 0:48:42- # I want to hold you so... # - Oh!
0:48:42 > 0:48:44LAUGHTER
0:48:49 > 0:48:51# At long last love has arrived... #
0:48:51 > 0:48:53I'm arriving, I'm arriving.
0:48:55 > 0:48:57# And I thank God that I'm alive... #
0:48:57 > 0:48:59Me, too.
0:48:59 > 0:49:03# You're just too good to be true
0:49:03 > 0:49:05# Can't take my eyes off of you. #
0:49:05 > 0:49:10- Everybody! - # Doo-doo, doo-doo, doo-doo-doo-doo
0:49:10 > 0:49:14# Doo-doo-doo, doo-doo, doo...
0:49:14 > 0:49:17# I love you, baby
0:49:17 > 0:49:18# And if it's quite all right
0:49:18 > 0:49:20# I need you, baby
0:49:20 > 0:49:22# To warm one lonely night
0:49:22 > 0:49:25# Oh, lovely baby
0:49:25 > 0:49:29# Trust in me when I say
0:49:29 > 0:49:31# Oh, pretty baby... #
0:49:31 > 0:49:33Hold it! Hold it, please!
0:49:33 > 0:49:35Please, stop. My nipples can't take any more.
0:49:38 > 0:49:41I swear to God, they're, like, trying to break out of prison.
0:49:43 > 0:49:46Aston, if you get yourself ready on the stage, I will announce you.
0:49:46 > 0:49:50- Thank you. Thanks.- Thanks, son.
0:49:50 > 0:49:54Now, here he is, singing his new single,
0:49:54 > 0:49:59Precious - and he is precious - Mr Aston Merrygold.
0:49:59 > 0:50:00Rubber gloves.
0:50:08 > 0:50:10Right, there's this girl...
0:50:12 > 0:50:13# Ooh
0:50:14 > 0:50:16# Hey
0:50:16 > 0:50:18# My little brother you're special, too
0:50:18 > 0:50:20# My momma said getting you is one of my better moves
0:50:20 > 0:50:25# And my older brother's saying you wanna find the love of your life
0:50:26 > 0:50:28# Don't know where he planned to take it, though
0:50:28 > 0:50:31# I ain't even expecting me to make it home
0:50:32 > 0:50:36# Without something that I got to say
0:50:36 > 0:50:38# Oh, yeah
0:50:38 > 0:50:41# Better than myself you are to me
0:50:41 > 0:50:45# Ain't nothing wrong with a little soul philanthropy
0:50:45 > 0:50:48# Oh, touch me now, baby
0:50:48 > 0:50:51# But everybody wants to be a lover
0:50:51 > 0:50:53# So when you're out there
0:50:53 > 0:50:56# Do this one for me
0:50:56 > 0:50:58# Oh, yeah
0:50:58 > 0:51:00# Darling, don't be so precious
0:51:00 > 0:51:03# Darling, don't be so cute
0:51:03 > 0:51:05# I don't want nobody else
0:51:05 > 0:51:08# Loving you
0:51:08 > 0:51:11# Darling, don't be so wonderful
0:51:11 > 0:51:13# They might get confused
0:51:13 > 0:51:15# I don't want nobody else
0:51:15 > 0:51:18# Loving you
0:51:19 > 0:51:21# Yeah
0:51:21 > 0:51:23# Cos now that heaven don't feel so far away
0:51:23 > 0:51:26# Steady love is at the heart of the party
0:51:26 > 0:51:29# Girl, I promise I wanna, I'mma show up
0:51:31 > 0:51:33# Cos now the highway don't feel so lonely
0:51:33 > 0:51:37# With Miss Independent depending on me
0:51:37 > 0:51:40# To be the water in her well of love
0:51:40 > 0:51:42# Oh, yeah
0:51:42 > 0:51:45# Well, everybody wants to be a lover
0:51:47 > 0:51:50# So do this one for me
0:51:50 > 0:51:52# When you're out there, pretty baby
0:51:52 > 0:51:54# Darling, don't be so precious
0:51:54 > 0:51:57# Darling, don't be so cute
0:51:57 > 0:51:59# Don't want nobody else
0:51:59 > 0:52:02# Loving you
0:52:02 > 0:52:05# Darling, don't be so wonderful
0:52:05 > 0:52:07# They might get confused
0:52:07 > 0:52:09# I don't want nobody else
0:52:09 > 0:52:13# Loving you
0:52:13 > 0:52:16# Everybody wants to be a lover
0:52:16 > 0:52:18# So when you're out there
0:52:18 > 0:52:21# Do this one for me
0:52:21 > 0:52:23# Oh, yeah
0:52:23 > 0:52:25# Don't be so precious
0:52:25 > 0:52:28# Darling, don't be so cute
0:52:28 > 0:52:30# Don't want nobody else
0:52:30 > 0:52:33# Loving you
0:52:33 > 0:52:36# Darling, don't be so wonderful
0:52:36 > 0:52:38# They might get confused
0:52:38 > 0:52:41# I don't want nobody else
0:52:41 > 0:52:43# Loving you
0:52:43 > 0:52:47# I don't want nobody else
0:52:47 > 0:52:51# Nobody else Nobody else
0:52:53 > 0:52:55# Whoo! Ooh-ooh
0:52:55 > 0:52:57# Oh
0:52:57 > 0:52:59# Sienna, oh, baby... #
0:52:59 > 0:53:02Thank you so much. Peace and love.
0:53:02 > 0:53:04CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:53:10 > 0:53:12Loving this Saturday night of fun.
0:53:12 > 0:53:15Ashley Banjo and his mammy were just perfect guests.
0:53:15 > 0:53:18It's not just the dancing that runs through that family.
0:53:18 > 0:53:20It's the kindness and the personality, too.
0:53:20 > 0:53:23And Sue Perkins - oh, my God. She's wonderful.
0:53:23 > 0:53:25For me, she's not a sponge.
0:53:25 > 0:53:28She was the cherry on the top.
0:53:28 > 0:53:32It was nice to see What's-his-name Merriweather back.
0:53:32 > 0:53:33Even without his JCB.
0:53:35 > 0:53:37And his friend, strumming his banjo,
0:53:37 > 0:53:40and the other fella going "Oh-oh-oh" on the microphone.
0:53:40 > 0:53:42Hm... It was nice.
0:53:42 > 0:53:43Enjoy the rest of the weekend.
0:53:43 > 0:53:46Oh, and by the way, don't get caught.
0:53:46 > 0:53:48Good night!
0:53:48 > 0:53:50CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:53:54 > 0:53:57# Make a date, don't be late
0:53:57 > 0:53:59# Cos you know it's gonna be great
0:53:59 > 0:54:04# When the irrepressible Browns come to town
0:54:04 > 0:54:07# To begin, just tune in
0:54:07 > 0:54:10# And you'll wear an ear-to-ear grin
0:54:10 > 0:54:14# Watching Agnes and her clan act the clown
0:54:15 > 0:54:18# Instead of feeling depressed
0:54:18 > 0:54:20# Let laughter make you feel blessed
0:54:20 > 0:54:22# So it's all round
0:54:22 > 0:54:25# To Mrs Brown's! #