0:00:38 > 0:00:41It's official that Nath's going to deaf school in three months,
0:00:41 > 0:00:44and he's gonna be gone for two years.
0:00:44 > 0:00:48So I was thinking we could have, like, a massive farewell party in the backyard.
0:00:48 > 0:00:51- Like, the biggest party we've ever had.- Nathan!
0:00:51 > 0:00:54I was talking to Nath about it and I was going, like,
0:00:54 > 0:00:57if you could invite any guests in the world to your farewell party,
0:00:57 > 0:00:59who would you invite?
0:00:59 > 0:01:02He goes, the legends - Blake, Smouse and Emily.
0:01:02 > 0:01:07And, like, you were there. Like, at first I was like, get fucked, cos I thought,
0:01:07 > 0:01:11I dunno, it's a bit weird having people you don't know.
0:01:11 > 0:01:14But it's the legends. Like, it'd actually be fuckin' cool.
0:01:14 > 0:01:16It'd be really fun havin' 'em there.
0:01:16 > 0:01:18What about Emily Chase? Think she'll fit in?
0:01:18 > 0:01:21Yeah, like she'd go to heaps of parties and that.
0:01:21 > 0:01:23She'll be really fun, I reckon.
0:01:23 > 0:01:24Oh, yeah, it's gonna be sick as, man.
0:01:24 > 0:01:28- Smouse is like one of the top, man. I mean...- Yeah, singing with Smouse too.
0:01:28 > 0:01:32- He'll teach us raps and shit. - Yeah, like do some freestyle shit.
0:01:32 > 0:01:36Like, if Nath has lost his humour, get him right up next to the speakers and that,
0:01:36 > 0:01:40- so he just really feels it. - For sure.- Oh, Nath, you're gonna go nuts.- Fucking wicked.
0:01:40 > 0:01:43Nath, Smouse. When Smouse is performing at your party, man.
0:01:43 > 0:01:46You're gonna go fuckin' mental. I reckon Blake Oakfield, right?
0:01:46 > 0:01:50We'll go down the dam, get him to do some surfing and that for us.
0:01:50 > 0:01:54- He is such a mad surfer. - Oh, fuck, man. Legendary.- Oh, yeah.
0:01:54 > 0:01:58And Emily, mate, just...whatever. Just fuck, whatever she wants to do.
0:01:58 > 0:02:02If she wants to get with Nath or something, you know. If she wants to get on with me,
0:02:02 > 0:02:06fine, like as gratitude for the invitation and that, I'm up for that.
0:02:06 > 0:02:10I'm getting my gran to help out with the invitations and that.
0:02:10 > 0:02:15Well, it sounds like a wonderful idea. I'll get on to those managers and email them then.
0:02:15 > 0:02:20- She's gonna contact all the legends and, like, their managers and shit. - All right, Daniel.
0:02:20 > 0:02:23Daniel, really, it's a nice idea but, really, it's a bit far fetched.
0:02:23 > 0:02:27- Do you really think it's likely? - I don't give a shit what you think. I'm inviting them anyway.
0:02:27 > 0:02:30Why don't we just have a family get together
0:02:30 > 0:02:32and we can have a few friends over.
0:02:32 > 0:02:36Having friends over? I wanna make it good. I wanna make it memorable.
0:02:36 > 0:02:39Do you think these Hollywood celebrities are going to come to Dunt, do you?
0:02:39 > 0:02:43- Why would they?- Who asked you, dickhead? I'm fuckin' inviting them.
0:02:43 > 0:02:45I don't give a shit what you two think.
0:02:53 > 0:02:56We're a town of about 2,300 people.
0:02:56 > 0:03:01A popular tourist destination for a small town, we're most famously known as being the home of
0:03:01 > 0:03:03surfing legend, Blake Oakfield.
0:03:04 > 0:03:07Blake is an absolute legend.
0:03:07 > 0:03:10In my book, you could not meet a nicer bloke.
0:03:10 > 0:03:14He's won world titles in surfing. He's put the town on the map.
0:03:14 > 0:03:18He's got his surf school, looks after the young blokes.
0:03:18 > 0:03:20I couldn't speak highly enough of him.
0:03:20 > 0:03:23I wouldn't say he's my favourite person.
0:03:23 > 0:03:26Yeah, bit of a smart alec. In love with himself.
0:03:26 > 0:03:31He thinks he's this major hero in the local township, and he's actually a dickhead.
0:03:31 > 0:03:32Hey, Blakey boy!
0:03:32 > 0:03:34Him and his gang come into town,
0:03:34 > 0:03:36cause a lot of trouble amongst the locals.
0:03:36 > 0:03:42I'm not a fan of him at all. He's, ah, he's... I reckon he's trouble.
0:03:43 > 0:03:46Everyone pretty much got the wrong idea.
0:03:46 > 0:03:49They didn't realise that we weren't violent,
0:03:49 > 0:03:52we were about protecting Narmucca Bay.
0:03:52 > 0:03:54This is our home. We've been here for generations.
0:03:54 > 0:03:59There's history. Why would we not stand up for our rights?
0:03:59 > 0:04:04Like, yeah, I was world champ, but I was also primarily a Mucca Mad Boy.
0:04:06 > 0:04:10As a kid here, it was old time, good family environment.
0:04:10 > 0:04:14We got to about that age, like year four, five, six at Narmucca West Primary
0:04:14 > 0:04:17when we first picked up boards and we were just mad for it.
0:04:17 > 0:04:21All the boys from Narmucca Bay, we knew 'em. Like, if you were in Narmucca Bay, we knew ya.
0:04:21 > 0:04:26If we were hanging down the milk bar and stuff, you're from Narmucca Bay, gidday, you know.
0:04:26 > 0:04:28You just didn't get along with the Fennel Heads guys.
0:04:28 > 0:04:30It was just kinda how it was.
0:04:34 > 0:04:37I guess, at the end of the day, we had shit surf conditions.
0:04:37 > 0:04:40I mean, our break was nowhere near as good as theirs.
0:04:40 > 0:04:43The way we saw it, just because we came from Fennel Heads,
0:04:43 > 0:04:47you know, didn't mean that we couldn't surf Narmucca Bay.
0:04:47 > 0:04:51Blake and his boys thought otherwise, but you know, that's just the way it was.
0:04:51 > 0:04:56You know, a bunch of dickheads from day one. Like, I remember, they just come over the headland,
0:04:56 > 0:04:59- just with their boards. - Mucca Mad Boys!
0:04:59 > 0:05:02Scrambling down onto our beach and just take over our waves.
0:05:02 > 0:05:07We just told 'em to fuck off, and that's when I formed Mucca Mad Boys.
0:05:09 > 0:05:14It's a gang, it's a society of young surfers, just young blokes,
0:05:14 > 0:05:18who wanted to surf their own waves, with the motto being, "Protect our Bay".
0:05:18 > 0:05:22- They ripped off our idea and formed the Fennel Hell Men. - We had big fights and stuff,
0:05:22 > 0:05:27just full fist fights. Like boys getting hammered and that, and all the tourists and stuff,
0:05:27 > 0:05:31they'd get scared and they'd pack up their towels and shit and run away.
0:05:31 > 0:05:36What they didn't realise was we were just protecting it from the Fennel Heads fuckwits.
0:05:36 > 0:05:37We were making it a safer place for 'em.
0:05:40 > 0:05:45The headland became the divider that defined the gangs, so if you were a young guy into surfing,
0:05:45 > 0:05:50then you were either with the Fennel Hell Men or the Mucca Mad Boys.
0:05:51 > 0:05:56It became more about the fighting rather than surfing and protecting the beach,
0:05:56 > 0:06:00and like, for a lot of young blokes in Narmucca Bay,
0:06:00 > 0:06:05if you wanted protection from the Fennel Heads guys, you needed to be part of the Mucca Mad Boys.
0:06:05 > 0:06:07You needed to be in the gang.
0:06:08 > 0:06:12Him and his gang would come into town, cause trouble amongst the locals.
0:06:12 > 0:06:17They've caused trouble at the bowling club, so if they're around,
0:06:17 > 0:06:19people prefer to stay indoors out of their way.
0:06:19 > 0:06:23"Play Hard, Muc Hard" is the motto.
0:06:23 > 0:06:26And it means play hard.
0:06:26 > 0:06:29If you're gonna surf, if you're gonna party,
0:06:29 > 0:06:32if you're gonna do anything, play it hard.
0:06:32 > 0:06:37If you're gonna...and Muc, Mucca, Narmucca, it's short for that.
0:06:37 > 0:06:41"Muc Hard", meaning "muc hard".
0:06:41 > 0:06:44This tat has a lot of value,
0:06:44 > 0:06:47and if you try to copy it or you try to get something similar,
0:06:47 > 0:06:50then we'll beat the shit outta you.
0:06:50 > 0:06:52Then there's the salute. This represents the headland,
0:06:52 > 0:06:55the headland between Fennel Heads and Narmucca Bay.
0:06:55 > 0:06:58This is the bay. So you've got your bay there.
0:06:58 > 0:07:02This is where you would go surfing if you were in Narmucca Bay. So you got headland, headland,
0:07:02 > 0:07:07this is hang loose, represents surfing, cross the heart. Cross the heart and make that firm,
0:07:07 > 0:07:08so you go "Oi, oi, oi!"
0:07:08 > 0:07:11"Mucca, Mucca, Mucca, oi, oi, oi!"
0:07:11 > 0:07:16Then there's the secret neck greeting. Like, if you see another Narmucca bloke,
0:07:16 > 0:07:19"Hey, how're you going", down the street, you give him a bit of this.
0:07:19 > 0:07:24The secret neck greeting, which is actually hang loose fingers around the neck. So do that.
0:07:30 > 0:07:36Mucca Mad Boys, to us, they're like a bunch of spoilt brats
0:07:36 > 0:07:38that never learnt to share their toys.
0:07:38 > 0:07:42All we wanted to do was share the ocean with them.
0:07:42 > 0:07:46We're keeping the Fennel Heads fuckwits out of here. Out of our beach, out of our town.
0:07:46 > 0:07:51Yeah, if it wasn't for us, Narmucca Bay'd be a really different place.
0:08:04 > 0:08:08- Go home.- Are you serious right there?- I'm fuckin' serious, motherfucker.
0:08:08 > 0:08:09Go home to your own house.
0:08:09 > 0:08:12- Hey, yo, chill out. - Too bad, motherfucker.
0:08:12 > 0:08:14- Hey!- You're locked out. You're not comin' back in.
0:08:14 > 0:08:18- Wanna come back in?- Yeah.- I got a task for you. Rap my biggest selling single.- Nah, bro.
0:08:18 > 0:08:23- Rap my single, motherfucker. - I gotta slap my elbow.- Yeah, yeah, motherfucker.- Slap my elbow.
0:08:23 > 0:08:28Listen, motherfucker. You got that wrong. I said my biggest selling single in Japan which is Animal Zoo.
0:08:28 > 0:08:31It's Animal Zoo, motherfucker. Rap that shit!
0:08:31 > 0:08:34Yeah, well when I first heard I was gonna be incarcerated for two months,
0:08:34 > 0:08:38at my parents' house, I thought, that's gonna be boring.
0:08:38 > 0:08:41- I'm gonna get you a record deal for that, motherfucker.- Yeah? - No. Kiddin'.
0:08:41 > 0:08:46So I brought some shit from my mansion. I got my plasma, I got my DVDs.
0:08:46 > 0:08:50I got my PS3, yeah. High speed wireless internet.
0:08:50 > 0:08:55We got all the shit that you need to keep yourself entertained while you're on house arrest.
0:08:55 > 0:09:03Yeah, this is some shit that my fans sent me, wishing me well while I'm doing my time on the inside.
0:09:03 > 0:09:06They make these dolls of me. There's a little mini Smouse there.
0:09:06 > 0:09:10They knit shit. I think this might be made by a retarded fan, possibly.
0:09:10 > 0:09:13- That shit is kinda fly, though. - Yeah, you can have that shit.
0:09:13 > 0:09:16"I Love Smouse", yeah. We know that motherfucker.
0:09:16 > 0:09:21"Good luck doin' time, Smouse. You're hot. Love Ashlee, 14 years old."
0:09:21 > 0:09:24- Well, you pretty hot too, there. - What the fuck?
0:09:24 > 0:09:27We got a lot of bad press on online still,
0:09:27 > 0:09:31about me taking a dump on the hood of the police car, but you know,
0:09:31 > 0:09:35my label, Jump Roc, they supportin' me through this whole ordeal,
0:09:35 > 0:09:38and they almost glad I'm doin' time, you know what I'm sayin, yeah?
0:09:38 > 0:09:43They glad cos it's given me a little bit of time to rest my vocal chords,
0:09:43 > 0:09:45you know what I'm sayin'? And my real fans,
0:09:45 > 0:09:48they is lovin' my ass still, yeah.
0:09:48 > 0:09:53We got the paparazzi out the front there waitin' to take a photo of me every time I leave the house.
0:09:53 > 0:09:56- Really?- Yeah.- I ain't seen nobody out there.
0:09:56 > 0:10:00Well, you ain't lookin' hard enough, nigger. They out there.
0:10:00 > 0:10:05- They must be camouflaged like a bitch.- They got the long lens, they got the zoom lens.- Oh, OK.
0:10:05 > 0:10:09They can zoom right in. They lay ten kilometres away and you not seein' 'em.
0:10:09 > 0:10:11They a long, long way away, nigger.
0:10:13 > 0:10:16Where the fuck you been?
0:10:16 > 0:10:21Hey, this is my Lasquisha, my girl. Say hey.
0:10:21 > 0:10:24Me and Smouse is somewhat of a relationship of convenience.
0:10:24 > 0:10:29- I mean, I love him but I don't really "love" him, you know?- Yeah.
0:10:29 > 0:10:32- It's whatever. - I gotta agree with that.
0:10:32 > 0:10:37We make love but we ain't in love, if you know what I'm sayin'.
0:10:37 > 0:10:40I gotta say, this girl ain't, I wouldn't say a slut,
0:10:40 > 0:10:42but she gets around a bit.
0:10:42 > 0:10:45- We have...- This dude is a joke. - Well, why you with me right now?
0:10:45 > 0:10:50- Why are you with me? - Why you text me this afternoon and say,
0:10:50 > 0:10:52"I gonna see in ten minutes, babe.
0:10:52 > 0:10:55"I can't wait for tonight." You be lyin' to him...
0:10:55 > 0:10:57- Shut the fuck up!- ..if you telling me you didn't send it,
0:10:57 > 0:11:02that you said you wanted to come here, because you love my ass. You love me, that's it.
0:11:02 > 0:11:05The great thing about Lasquisha and the thing I love about her
0:11:05 > 0:11:09is we can talk like this to each other. You see the way we vibin' together.
0:11:09 > 0:11:11We can cuss at each other.
0:11:11 > 0:11:17I can say, "You're a fuckin' bitch", you know, and she say more shit back to me, and we OK.
0:11:17 > 0:11:20We have big fights, and you know the best thing about the fights
0:11:20 > 0:11:23is after the fights, we get it on.
0:11:23 > 0:11:26- He says I'm a bitch, I say, "You can suck a dick".- Yeah.
0:11:28 > 0:11:33- So you reckon have seating on that side?- Just have them sittin' over there or something.
0:11:33 > 0:11:36- Yeah, have like a VIP section there. - Yeah.- Nath! Nathan!
0:11:36 > 0:11:40This is what we're thinking, mate, for Blake Oakfield's surf demo, right?
0:11:40 > 0:11:43We build like a surf stadium down on the dam, right?
0:11:43 > 0:11:48And he's got like a run up here, so he can do like a full surf demo for us.
0:11:48 > 0:11:50What do you reckon, Nath? Nod if you like it.
0:11:50 > 0:11:52- You happy?- Yeah.
0:11:52 > 0:11:55Daniel, did Steve mention the bricklayer's apprenticeship
0:11:55 > 0:11:59- that's coming up at his work next year?- No.
0:11:59 > 0:12:02- It could be a good idea. - I'm not...I'll be working on the farm, anyway.
0:12:02 > 0:12:06- I'm not going to need jobs. - I think it'd be good for you to do some work.
0:12:06 > 0:12:11- I'm not gonna be a fuckin' bricklayer.- Anyway, can you clean up that stuff when you finish?- Yes!
0:12:11 > 0:12:13Now, Nath, Smouse, right?
0:12:13 > 0:12:18- We're thinkin' of having a stage out the back, you know, the shed? - Yeah.- And have massive speakers.
0:12:18 > 0:12:21- Like, how high do you wanna go with them?- Yeah, pretty big man.
0:12:21 > 0:12:23Just like really fuckin' loud.
0:12:23 > 0:12:27Nathan! Best thing, we're thinking of calling the whole night...
0:12:27 > 0:12:30Nathan's Legendary Farewell Party.
0:12:30 > 0:12:33Cos it's legendary, cos all the legends are coming.
0:12:33 > 0:12:36What do you think, Nath? Good? You like it? Happy?
0:12:36 > 0:12:41- Yep.- Heaps a plenty to do, mate. We should go...you should talk to Loki's dad about getting that, like,
0:12:41 > 0:12:44some of his woodwork shit.
0:12:46 > 0:12:48All right, listen up.
0:12:48 > 0:12:50Y'all gotta listen to some new tracks here.
0:12:50 > 0:12:53Jump Roc sent through some new shit for my new album.
0:12:53 > 0:12:55Demo CD.
0:12:58 > 0:13:00# It's that gingerbread, gingerbread...
0:13:00 > 0:13:02What the fuck?
0:13:02 > 0:13:04What the fuck is that shit?
0:13:04 > 0:13:09# Gingerbread Smouse, gingerbread Smouse... #
0:13:09 > 0:13:14- What the fuck! That is gay off the hook. That is shit! - That shit's bullshit, brother.
0:13:14 > 0:13:18Turn that shit off. Get that shit outta my face.
0:13:18 > 0:13:21If you release more of that shit, I'm gonna dump your ass.
0:13:21 > 0:13:24"Larry, gay. Try again."
0:13:24 > 0:13:27You ought to listen to the man. He's been good to you.
0:13:27 > 0:13:28What the fuck?
0:13:28 > 0:13:31Don't "what the fuck" me. Listen to your manager.
0:13:31 > 0:13:34- Let him make decisions about your career.- He don't know shit.
0:13:34 > 0:13:39That man is the reason I get dissed in the industry. He choose kid's tracks for me.
0:13:39 > 0:13:44You wanna be a goddam loser all your fuckin' life? You got a monitor on your fuckin' ankle.
0:13:44 > 0:13:48You got a criminal record. You can't be too choosy, motherfucker.
0:13:48 > 0:13:53I know about my career, and my career tells me that I need to do my own music, not this shit.
0:13:53 > 0:13:57- I don't need no songwriters. - Bitch.- I don't need no motherfuckin' jump rock demo CDs.
0:13:57 > 0:14:03Throw that shit out, nigga. Mother Gingerbread fuckin' Smouse, what the fuck is that, anyway?
0:14:05 > 0:14:09We were about 23, 24, and you know, life was pretty good,
0:14:09 > 0:14:13and, well, we just wanted to have a fun night with the boys. You know, see in the new year.
0:14:13 > 0:14:17But what happened that night changed Blake's life forever, yeah?
0:14:17 > 0:14:20Well, initially, like, the Fennel Heads blokes
0:14:20 > 0:14:25stormed into the bar, as you can see through that front door there.
0:14:25 > 0:14:27And there's probably like 15, no, no, 20,
0:14:27 > 0:14:3220 to 30 of the Fennel Heads guys, Packo in amongst them.
0:14:32 > 0:14:36And he's all like, shitty, and, like, pissed off cos he reckons
0:14:36 > 0:14:40I'd done something which I, to this day, don't even remember doing.
0:14:40 > 0:14:44I pashed that chick which, you know maybe I did, maybe I didn't.
0:14:44 > 0:14:47I don't think I did. You know, we were out the front of the pub, right,
0:14:47 > 0:14:51we push those blokes out, so that the brawl's happening here, right.
0:14:51 > 0:14:54And there's like full fist fighting and shit.
0:14:54 > 0:14:58Like, some of the Fennel Heads blokes had bought bats with 'em. They had bats.
0:14:58 > 0:15:02I'm tryin' to like keep out of it, cos I know that Packo was after me, right,
0:15:02 > 0:15:05so I'm tryin' to like back off, sort of, be a little bit protected.
0:15:05 > 0:15:09All of a sudden, gun goes off and I'm like in shock,
0:15:09 > 0:15:13just cos of hearing a gun, you know what I mean? Like you hear a gun, you're like, fuck.
0:15:13 > 0:15:18And then I felt this weird thing, cos I couldn't feel it at first.
0:15:18 > 0:15:21And then I looked down and saw blood on my shorts,
0:15:21 > 0:15:24and that's when I knew I'd been shot in the balls.
0:15:25 > 0:15:29Yeah, I went to hospital and the doctor said my balls
0:15:29 > 0:15:33were so shattered by the bullet that he had no choice but to amputate.
0:15:33 > 0:15:37You couldn't recognise them, and they reckon like at the time,
0:15:37 > 0:15:41cos the bullet hit here, right, then it went through my legs
0:15:41 > 0:15:44and they reckon they found it like near a tree on the other side,
0:15:44 > 0:15:46but it'd, you know, done the damage.
0:15:46 > 0:15:47They reckon my dick shaft
0:15:47 > 0:15:50was swinging over to one side at the time,
0:15:50 > 0:15:52- and that's why it didn't get it. - It saved him.
0:15:52 > 0:15:55I do have no balls after that incident.
0:15:55 > 0:15:58I mean, they stitched it up and my sack's just, like,
0:15:58 > 0:16:02there's something left but it's nothing, there's no balls in there.
0:16:02 > 0:16:06When I got out, I guess I wanted to get back into surfing
0:16:06 > 0:16:09after I'd recovered, and it felt different.
0:16:09 > 0:16:14Like I knew that everyone knew that I had no balls, and that's...
0:16:14 > 0:16:18not that that made me, like, embarrassed or anything,
0:16:18 > 0:16:20but it just kinda changed things a little bit.
0:16:20 > 0:16:23I remember they had this comp down at Bells Beach
0:16:23 > 0:16:28and this weird thing happened. I was out surfing and I got wiped out, and when I was under the water,
0:16:28 > 0:16:34I felt this like snap on my legs, like this really tight squeeze.
0:16:34 > 0:16:38And what had happened was a dolphin had bitten my leg.
0:16:38 > 0:16:41Like a really hardcore bite, and it doesn't happen that often,
0:16:41 > 0:16:44but when it happens, it's fuckin' gnarly.
0:16:44 > 0:16:47Let me tell you, having lived through it, it fuckin' kills.
0:16:47 > 0:16:51But basically I came out of the water, and it just hit me.
0:16:51 > 0:16:54Surfing doesn't feel right any more. It didn't feel right.
0:16:54 > 0:16:57And I basically gave up surfing that day,
0:16:57 > 0:16:59and I haven't surfed since.
0:17:04 > 0:17:08Gotta cut that shit quick at the end there, you see what I'm sayin'?
0:17:08 > 0:17:11I'm not gonna get told what to do, you know what I'm sayin'?
0:17:11 > 0:17:13I'm gonna write my own shit. You know what I been doin'?
0:17:13 > 0:17:15I been writin' a track.
0:17:15 > 0:17:20Yeah, we put together a track today, a new song. It's my own shit, my original music,
0:17:20 > 0:17:23better than the shit that Larry sent me.
0:17:23 > 0:17:27This song, it's about a young boy, that's the theme of the song.
0:17:27 > 0:17:30And he been very confused, you know what I'm sayin'?
0:17:30 > 0:17:34It's a psychological song, because he likes the older ladies.
0:17:34 > 0:17:37And I'm not talkin' 40. I'm talkin' real old.
0:17:37 > 0:17:41# Grandmother fucker, he's a grandmother fucker
0:17:41 > 0:17:44# He likes to fuck the grandmas
0:17:44 > 0:17:47# When he was just 11... #
0:17:47 > 0:17:48That's our music video.
0:17:48 > 0:17:52See that lady there, that's my actual grandma.
0:17:52 > 0:17:54Yeah, she gonna love that shit.
0:17:54 > 0:17:56# ..in his dick he wanted that lady
0:17:56 > 0:17:59# Grandmother fucker
0:17:59 > 0:18:01# Grandmother fucker... #
0:18:01 > 0:18:04Fans, they want that shit. They gonna eat that shit up.
0:18:04 > 0:18:07I know, but Jump Roc's gonna fuckin' flip out and you know that.
0:18:07 > 0:18:11- Fuck Jump Roc. They can eat my dick. I'm too big for them to do nothin'.- Bad, yo.
0:18:11 > 0:18:14- They ain't gonna dump my ass. - Larry's gonna go insane.- Fuck Larry.
0:18:14 > 0:18:17- I don't give a shit. - Who gives a fuck about Larry? Just upload it.
0:18:17 > 0:18:21You upload that shit, put it on my site. Get it out to the fans. That's what they want.
0:18:21 > 0:18:23All right, all right.
0:18:23 > 0:18:27- Yeah, uploadin'!- You're a crazy motherfucker, B.- I don't care.
0:18:27 > 0:18:30You gotta be crazy sometimes, you know what I'm sayin'?
0:18:30 > 0:18:34Tahlia, can you go and get your stuff, please?
0:18:34 > 0:18:37I was separated with my two kids when I first got together with Blake.
0:18:37 > 0:18:40He was actually at his lowest point when we got together.
0:18:40 > 0:18:42He'd given up surfing after the dolphin bite.
0:18:42 > 0:18:45Made a lot of money out of surfing, but he had lost most of it.
0:18:45 > 0:18:48You know, gambling and bailing out his gang mates.
0:18:48 > 0:18:52It was around about that time that he stacked on a heap of weight.
0:18:52 > 0:18:55You know, he just used to sit around all day eating junk food.
0:18:55 > 0:18:59I got a bit porky. I'd been dumped by Billabong.
0:18:59 > 0:19:00No more pay checks coming in.
0:19:00 > 0:19:03They got the shits with me once I stopped competing.
0:19:03 > 0:19:06I had my mates, but without surfing in my life,
0:19:06 > 0:19:09I didn't really have much else and, yeah,
0:19:09 > 0:19:13Kareena and the kids came along, pretty much changed everything.
0:19:13 > 0:19:16All right, careful, Mum. She's in a fragile condition.
0:19:16 > 0:19:21And we've got a new one. Show 'em your stomach there, babe. New one due soon here. Um, yep.
0:19:21 > 0:19:24Had to get a sperm donor in for that one cos I got no nuts, so...
0:19:24 > 0:19:27- You don't have nuts! - Oi, you!- Jake!
0:19:27 > 0:19:29Don't tell 'em my secrets, eh?
0:19:29 > 0:19:32But no, it's all good. Life's pretty good at the moment.
0:19:32 > 0:19:35Me and the Mucca Mad Boys tend to chill out at my place a fair bit.
0:19:35 > 0:19:38This is a sort of games area underneath the house.
0:19:38 > 0:19:41They can chill in hammocks and stuff. Say gidday, guys.
0:19:41 > 0:19:44Got ping pong, if you're into ping pong.
0:19:44 > 0:19:46This is the clubhouse here where we just like chill again.
0:19:46 > 0:19:49- There's heaps of stuff to do. Gidday, Simo.- Hey, Blakey.
0:19:49 > 0:19:51I got my 2:30 injections.
0:19:51 > 0:19:55Got to...do my hormones twice a day, actually.
0:19:55 > 0:19:58Testosterone, cos I got no balls.
0:19:58 > 0:20:00You can get artificial balls.
0:20:00 > 0:20:04I sorta looked into it, did some research. You can get these artificial ones.
0:20:04 > 0:20:08Kareena's pretty keen for me to get 'em. It's just this twice a day.
0:20:08 > 0:20:10One of the good things about having no balls is, like,
0:20:10 > 0:20:13you can get kicked in the nuts and it doesn't hurt.
0:20:13 > 0:20:15Didn't hurt. Do it again.
0:20:16 > 0:20:19Didn't hurt. Can't feel a thing. Can't feel it. Do it again.
0:20:19 > 0:20:21Didn't hurt. Didn't hurt.
0:20:21 > 0:20:25- Hard as you want.- Do it. Do it really hard. Do it hard... Oh!
0:20:25 > 0:20:27Didn't hurt. Didn't hurt.
0:20:27 > 0:20:32- They specifically told you not...- I know!- ..to put shit on the internet.
0:20:32 > 0:20:35What you gonna do when Larry calls? He's gonna be pissed off
0:20:35 > 0:20:39for you writing these dirty ass songs again. These are the people that work for you!
0:20:39 > 0:20:42You know how many hits I got online with that song?
0:20:42 > 0:20:44That thing's gone off the hook on the internet.
0:20:44 > 0:20:47I don't give a fuck how many songs and how much hits it has.
0:20:47 > 0:20:50You can't always do what you're told. Great artists,
0:20:50 > 0:20:53like me, they do shit they not told to do.
0:20:53 > 0:20:57You put a...you dress up like an old woman, you get on the internet,
0:20:57 > 0:21:01- you put a picture of your own grandmother...- You don't understand. - ..on the fuckin' internet!
0:21:01 > 0:21:04- Just shut up and mind your own business. Really.- Yeah.
0:21:04 > 0:21:08- Who is this bitch?- Who the fuck are you?- My girlfriend.
0:21:08 > 0:21:11- My business? This is my motherfuckin' son!- She no bitch, she my girl!
0:21:11 > 0:21:15Who the fuck are you? You act like you fuckin' 15. Why don't you grow up?
0:21:15 > 0:21:19I got money, I can take lawyers out on you. If you try to kick my ass, you know what's gonna happen.
0:21:19 > 0:21:23- You're gonna end up in jail.- You think I'd give a fuck, motherfucker.
0:21:23 > 0:21:24I brought you into this world.
0:21:24 > 0:21:27- I'll take you out. - Listen, Dad, one question.
0:21:27 > 0:21:32- How many multi-platinum singles you got?- I'm not playin' this game with you.- Answer my question!
0:21:32 > 0:21:34- None!- How many singles?- None.
0:21:34 > 0:21:37None! How many I got? One more than you, motherfucker.
0:21:37 > 0:21:41So eat a dick, keep out of my business, I'm not your kid any more.
0:21:41 > 0:21:42I've flown the coop.
0:21:42 > 0:21:48Blake's been offered this unbelievable opportunity to return to surfing.
0:21:48 > 0:21:51It's the Billabong Legends of Surfing World Tour.
0:21:51 > 0:21:52And he said no.
0:21:52 > 0:21:54Don't put your arse near me.
0:21:54 > 0:21:56He reckons he doesn't want to surf again.
0:21:56 > 0:22:00- People say Blake's dumb. - Let's do knee up.- They're always saying to me how dumb he is
0:22:00 > 0:22:03for giving up surfing, but I reckon he's borderline genius.
0:22:06 > 0:22:11Blake's not scared to go back to surfing. You know, the guy's not scared of anything.
0:22:11 > 0:22:13He's got the biggest balls of anyone I know.
0:22:13 > 0:22:16Well, not actual balls, but...you know what I mean.
0:22:17 > 0:22:20Nah, my life's not about surfing any more.
0:22:20 > 0:22:22It's just not where I'm at at the moment.
0:22:22 > 0:22:24I got too much to do with the gang and that.
0:22:24 > 0:22:27Like, the Mucca Mad Boys takes up a fair bit of time.
0:22:27 > 0:22:30Like, our presence around town is pretty important.
0:22:30 > 0:22:32You know, the life guards and that appreciate us
0:22:32 > 0:22:36just keeping an eye on the beach and that. How's it all going?
0:22:36 > 0:22:41God, I love him to death, but he's thrown away heaps of opportunities.
0:22:41 > 0:22:45And he's got real family responsibilities now.
0:22:45 > 0:22:49You know, I just feel like he just needs to adjust his priorities a little bit.
0:22:49 > 0:22:51Go your hardest. Didn't feel it.
0:22:51 > 0:22:54He spends a lot of time hanging out with his gang mates.
0:22:54 > 0:22:56He's not 15 any more.
0:23:00 > 0:23:03I think in life, you're pretty much nothing without your mates.
0:23:03 > 0:23:09And I know it's not the '80s any more and heaps of the founding blokes have moved on and that,
0:23:09 > 0:23:14but I think the legend of the Mucca Mad Boys still lives on.
0:23:14 > 0:23:16It's still very much alive today.
0:23:16 > 0:23:17Ready, boys?
0:23:17 > 0:23:22And I want to make it my mission to carry that legacy on into a new generation,
0:23:22 > 0:23:27and to keep the Fennel Heads fuckwits out of Narmucca Bay forever.
0:23:27 > 0:23:30- Mucca, Mucca, Mucca! - ALL:- Oi, oi, oi!
0:23:32 > 0:23:33Yeah.
0:23:35 > 0:23:36Yeah, I get it.
0:23:36 > 0:23:39If you're a rap artist, or you're any kind of artist,
0:23:39 > 0:23:40you gotta be true to yourself.
0:23:40 > 0:23:43You gotta make yourself proud.
0:23:43 > 0:23:44OK, bye.
0:23:48 > 0:23:49I got dumped.
0:23:50 > 0:23:53You dumb motherfucker. I told you!
0:23:53 > 0:23:56Man, they gotta give you another chance.
0:23:56 > 0:23:59They said they got a lot of complaints from grandmas about my video.
0:23:59 > 0:24:01A lot of complaints from a lot of people,
0:24:01 > 0:24:06and they don't think I'm a viable artist for their label no more.
0:24:06 > 0:24:09You gone and fucked up your life again, man. Well, done.
0:24:09 > 0:24:11Good job(!)
0:24:11 > 0:24:14When you have a talent as big as mine, a lot of niggers,
0:24:14 > 0:24:17they don't understand you and you can feel alienated.
0:24:17 > 0:24:18What you gonna do, yo?
0:24:18 > 0:24:20I don't know.
0:24:20 > 0:24:23You know, we could do like a video apology, man.
0:24:23 > 0:24:26You're apologising to your grandmother. That's for goddamn sure.
0:24:26 > 0:24:29Smouse, if you don't get another record deal,
0:24:29 > 0:24:30I'm not gonna stick around.
0:24:30 > 0:24:32- What the fuck? - Hope you know that.
0:24:32 > 0:24:36What, you think that's the thing to tell me right now? Thank you, Lasquisha.
0:24:36 > 0:24:41You can't be boxed in to what they want you to be, you hear me?
0:24:41 > 0:24:43You gotta stand up for yourself.
0:24:43 > 0:24:45You gotta do what you believe in.
0:24:45 > 0:24:48I got dumped from my label today.
0:24:48 > 0:24:52But that don't mean shit, mother-fuckers.
0:24:52 > 0:24:56To all my fans out there, watch this space.
0:24:56 > 0:24:58What this space, niggers.
0:24:59 > 0:25:00Yeah.
0:25:00 > 0:25:03- Go forward.- Keep coming!
0:25:03 > 0:25:06Ah, we haven't heard any word yet.
0:25:06 > 0:25:11Gran sent out all the invites to the managers and shit of all the legends.
0:25:11 > 0:25:14- Fuck.- So hopefully we'll hear soon.
0:25:14 > 0:25:17Oh, fuck dude, you're bogged.
0:25:17 > 0:25:21And, like, we went down the dam and cleared out some trees and bushes and shit
0:25:21 > 0:25:24just to make sure the bloke's got a good run up for when he hits the dam.
0:25:24 > 0:25:27- Daniel!- You are so fucking bogged. - Daniel, Steve's coming.
0:25:27 > 0:25:30Yeah, Nate's pumped. He's pretty happy so far with what I've come up with.
0:25:30 > 0:25:32Daniel!
0:25:32 > 0:25:36Hey, I thought I told you not to use that in the paddocks.
0:25:36 > 0:25:39Hey, look, your Mum's getting dinner on.
0:25:39 > 0:25:41Hey, and some bloke rang from a modelling agency.
0:25:41 > 0:25:45He said thanks for the invite, but Emily someone won't be coming to your party.
0:25:45 > 0:25:47Bullshit. Are you serious?
0:25:47 > 0:25:50- Yeah. Look, ask your Mum about it. - Emily Chase?
0:25:50 > 0:25:55Your grandmother must have given them our number. Yeah, looks like your party really is happening.
0:25:55 > 0:25:59And as I predicted, celebrities aren't going to want to come here.
0:25:59 > 0:26:02Fuck, man. Now you're gonna have to invite another one,
0:26:02 > 0:26:07- cos there was three wishes, wasn't there?- Yeah. Oh, fuck, can't believe she got the invitation.
0:26:07 > 0:26:09- Sick as, man. - Good on you, Gran. She got it out.
0:26:09 > 0:26:13- Nice.- It's really happening, mate. - Let's try and unbog this shit, man.
0:26:15 > 0:26:16I'm hungry.
0:26:20 > 0:26:24Initiations are a pretty big deal. Seperates the boys from the men.
0:26:24 > 0:26:28Tie that to your ball sack. As you know, we had the shark sighting a couple of weeks ago.
0:26:28 > 0:26:32That's Packo's handwriting, too. Right, get on the wall boys.
0:26:32 > 0:26:36- If you've got any more piss left, then piss.- Why are we getting blamed for your graffiti issues?
0:26:36 > 0:26:39Do you want us to come beat the shit out of you, because we will.
0:26:41 > 0:26:43The king of skateboarding today.
0:26:43 > 0:26:46I am his mother and manager.
0:26:46 > 0:26:48There's other boys your age much better than you.
0:26:48 > 0:26:51I started to notice that he was gay.
0:26:51 > 0:26:53- He's gay! - Gay-no skate-o-board-ah.
0:26:53 > 0:26:57I'm not really gay, but my mum was so keen on the whole gay-ing.
0:26:57 > 0:26:59Skateboarding gay style!
0:26:59 > 0:27:01Skateboarding gay style!
0:27:01 > 0:27:03- ALL:- Skateboarding gay style!
0:27:03 > 0:27:07Skate stats, porn. Nathan's schoolwork, porn.
0:27:07 > 0:27:09He wanks like four times a day.
0:27:09 > 0:27:14Oh! I don't know his dick lasts the day. Oi, stop it!
0:27:14 > 0:27:17I even caught him lookin' at Mum in the shower.
0:27:17 > 0:27:19With your brain and my brain together,
0:27:19 > 0:27:21we will be the ultimate dude.
0:27:21 > 0:27:25- Where you keep your gay porno magazine?- Nathan! What are you doin'?
0:27:25 > 0:27:26Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd
0:27:26 > 0:27:28E-mail subtitling@bbc.co.uk