0:00:05 > 0:00:08Morning, Sarah! First day back.
0:00:08 > 0:00:10Can I offer you a lift?
0:00:10 > 0:00:12No, thanks, Keith, it's quite near.
0:00:12 > 0:00:13Still, be quicker in the car. Hop in.
0:00:21 > 0:00:22Pop your seat belt on.
0:00:24 > 0:00:28SOFT GUITAR MUSIC AND WHISTLING
0:00:44 > 0:00:46And here we are.
0:00:46 > 0:00:47Thank you for the lift.
0:00:48 > 0:00:50Sarah, I just wanted to say,
0:00:50 > 0:00:52it's a shame our dinner over the holidays didn't work out.
0:00:52 > 0:00:54It's not nice for a woman to be stood up.
0:00:54 > 0:00:56I didn't stand you up. Who could've known the town
0:00:56 > 0:00:59- had two Bella Italias? - I did give you the address.
0:00:59 > 0:01:01Yes, but I saw a Bella Italia in the town square
0:01:01 > 0:01:04- and presumed you'd got the address wrong.- I didn't get it wrong.
0:01:04 > 0:01:06- Well, you could've got it wrong. - But I didn't get it wrong.
0:01:06 > 0:01:08- You got it wrong. - So, did you enjoy your meal?
0:01:08 > 0:01:11Of course I didn't! I wasn't going to sit there on my own all night!
0:01:11 > 0:01:14Yes, I just had the bread and dips while I was waiting.
0:01:14 > 0:01:17Then I had the spaghetti carbonara followed by the tiramisu.
0:01:17 > 0:01:20After the cheese selection, I assumed you weren't coming,
0:01:20 > 0:01:22so I just had a coffee and some of those little almond biscuits.
0:01:22 > 0:01:24Sounds like you had a very nice evening(!)
0:01:24 > 0:01:27Yes, and it was very reasonably priced. We should go again.
0:01:27 > 0:01:30Same restaurant or separate ones?
0:01:30 > 0:01:33- Same one this time. - Hmm. We'll see.
0:01:39 > 0:01:41Well done, all! See you in September!
0:01:48 > 0:01:50Notice anything different about me today, babes?
0:01:50 > 0:01:53- Are you wearing deodorant? - No, it's my natural musk.
0:01:54 > 0:01:56Here, look.
0:01:56 > 0:01:59Tie, shirt. Oh - what's this?!
0:01:59 > 0:02:03- Oh, yes, you're reading a book. - Yeah, and why's that?
0:02:03 > 0:02:06Cos I'm going up in the world, babes. I'm not just the PE teacher
0:02:06 > 0:02:11any more. No, no, from today I'm also teaching joegraffy.
0:02:11 > 0:02:14- Geography.- Here, look.
0:02:14 > 0:02:16Who knew clouds were full of rain? Oosh!
0:02:20 > 0:02:22- Oh! - HE LAUGHS NERVOUSLY
0:02:22 > 0:02:23Excuse me, Jo.
0:02:24 > 0:02:27So...what happened to Gareth?
0:02:27 > 0:02:29Haven't you heard? Barber's gone mental.
0:02:29 > 0:02:32You can't say that any more.
0:02:32 > 0:02:35- Yes. He had a nervous episode. - Which made him go mental.
0:02:35 > 0:02:39I think the pressure of teaching finally got to him.
0:02:39 > 0:02:41And I shouldn't say this, but they found him
0:02:41 > 0:02:45crawling round the playing fields at night, naked from the waist down.
0:02:45 > 0:02:47Thank you, Janine, that is not a pleasant image.
0:02:47 > 0:02:49He had a soil thermometer wedged into his...
0:02:49 > 0:02:52That's enough. Some of us are trying to enjoy a biscuit.
0:02:52 > 0:02:54Poor, poor Gareth.
0:02:54 > 0:02:57I know we'll all miss seeing his smiley face in here.
0:03:00 > 0:03:01Morning.
0:03:08 > 0:03:09- SHE MOUTHS:- Let me speak to him.
0:03:09 > 0:03:11I'm sorry?
0:03:11 > 0:03:12- QUIET:- Let me speak to him.
0:03:12 > 0:03:14- I'm sorry? - LOUD:- Let me speak to him.
0:03:14 > 0:03:15Oh, right, yeah.
0:03:17 > 0:03:19- Hello, Gareth. - All right.
0:03:22 > 0:03:23How are you?
0:03:23 > 0:03:25Fine.
0:03:25 > 0:03:27How's your lunacy?
0:03:27 > 0:03:29Shut up, Keith! You're being very insensitive!
0:03:29 > 0:03:31- You're such a rude woman. - I said shut up!
0:03:33 > 0:03:35SOOTHING TONE: Now, Gareth...
0:03:35 > 0:03:39hmm, there's no easy way to put this,
0:03:39 > 0:03:43but you're not a teacher here any more.
0:03:46 > 0:03:49I know. If anyone's making a cup of tea,
0:03:49 > 0:03:51- I'll have one. Eight sugars. - Right, let me have a crack.
0:03:51 > 0:03:56Oi! Fruit loop! YOU, you don't work HERE, any more!
0:03:56 > 0:03:58Eesh!
0:04:00 > 0:04:03I do. I'm the new caretaker.
0:04:03 > 0:04:07- Oh! Good for you! - That's wonderful news, Gareth.
0:04:07 > 0:04:08Cheers.
0:04:10 > 0:04:13Polite note - they are teacher biscuits. Not for maintenance staff.
0:04:18 > 0:04:23So, a very big Greybridge welcome to all the new pupils
0:04:23 > 0:04:24who have joined us this year.
0:04:24 > 0:04:29As your headmistress, I offer you one word of friendly advice -
0:04:29 > 0:04:32cross me and I will destroy you.
0:04:34 > 0:04:36- Miss, um... - Postern. Been here a year.
0:04:43 > 0:04:45- You asked for it, you got it! - School disco, miss?
0:04:45 > 0:04:47- Uh-uh-uh.- Paintballing?
0:04:47 > 0:04:48- Uh-uh-uh.- No more French lessons?
0:04:48 > 0:04:51- LAUGHTER - No. This Friday, I have
0:04:51 > 0:04:54organised a careers day!
0:04:54 > 0:04:57So I'll be pulling together a careers posse
0:04:57 > 0:04:59and we will be running workshops in the morning,
0:04:59 > 0:05:03and in the afternoon, the big finale -
0:05:03 > 0:05:06a special celebrity guest is going to be
0:05:06 > 0:05:09coming in and talking to us about their career.
0:05:09 > 0:05:10- Is it Will Smith?- No.
0:05:10 > 0:05:12- Is it Jay-Z?- No.
0:05:12 > 0:05:13- Katy Perry? - It's someone quite well-known
0:05:13 > 0:05:15- but not as well-known as that. - Rihanna?
0:05:15 > 0:05:17Can I just say, lower your expectations.
0:05:17 > 0:05:21So, I hope to see you all at three o'clock on Friday.
0:05:21 > 0:05:22- Is it Kim Kardashian? - Please stop.
0:05:22 > 0:05:24- Is it one of the Kardashians?- No!
0:05:24 > 0:05:26- Better not be Justin Bieber. - It's not Justin Bieber.
0:05:26 > 0:05:31My brother's mate reckons they saw Nicki Minaj in Nando's on Saturday.
0:05:31 > 0:05:34- Is it Nicki Minaj, miss? - It's not Nicki Minaj, no.
0:05:34 > 0:05:37I'm going to just tell you who it is.
0:05:37 > 0:05:40It is - drum roll please - Fenella Forbes.
0:05:40 > 0:05:41MURMURING
0:05:41 > 0:05:43- Who? - She's an author.
0:05:43 > 0:05:46Whitney the Witch? Whitney the Witch Casts a Spell?
0:05:46 > 0:05:48- PUPILS: Aww...- Whitney the Witch and the Cat of Aznabar?
0:05:48 > 0:05:49We were at college together,
0:05:49 > 0:05:53and she's very kindly agreed to come and speak to you guys.
0:05:53 > 0:05:56Now, I'm going to hand you over to your music teacher,
0:05:56 > 0:06:02Mr Martin, who has some very exciting news about his own career.
0:06:02 > 0:06:03Cheers.
0:06:05 > 0:06:08So...
0:06:08 > 0:06:13over the holidays I've recorded my debut single. And, er...
0:06:13 > 0:06:15Cheers, yeah.
0:06:15 > 0:06:16And, er, it's out today
0:06:16 > 0:06:20on a little website you might have heard of, called iTune.
0:06:20 > 0:06:22PUPILS: Ooh. It's going to be big.
0:06:22 > 0:06:26So, let's face it - probably going to be my last week here...
0:06:27 > 0:06:29Keep it together, Luke.
0:06:29 > 0:06:33Anyway, the song is called, quite simply... Soar.
0:06:34 > 0:06:38That's S-O-A-R, not S-O-R-E. Or S-A-W.
0:06:38 > 0:06:40Bit weird to write a song about a saw.
0:06:40 > 0:06:42Or any kind of tool, really. OK, let's do this.
0:06:44 > 0:06:46BACKING TRACK PLAYS
0:06:47 > 0:06:51# I see the same old faces every day
0:06:51 > 0:06:56# Every time I look, they're getting old and grey
0:06:59 > 0:07:02# Well, it's a dead-end job in a dead-end place
0:07:02 > 0:07:05# And my life is not going to go to waste!
0:07:05 > 0:07:07# I'm going to soar
0:07:09 > 0:07:13# Grow my wings and fly and I'm going to soar
0:07:14 > 0:07:19# Burn my suit and tie and I'm going to soar
0:07:21 > 0:07:26# Wave these suckers goodbye, I'm going to soar
0:07:26 > 0:07:28# Bye-bye
0:07:29 > 0:07:31# Bye-bye. #
0:07:32 > 0:07:33Bye-bye.
0:07:35 > 0:07:37PUPILS: Whoo!
0:07:37 > 0:07:39WOLF WHISTLES
0:07:43 > 0:07:46Morning. Is she in?
0:07:46 > 0:07:48Is who in?
0:07:49 > 0:07:51- The headmistress. - Right, yeah.
0:07:52 > 0:07:53In where?
0:07:54 > 0:07:58- In the office.- Probably! Unless she's just climbed out the window again.
0:08:01 > 0:08:04- KNOCK ON DOOR - Don't come in.
0:08:04 > 0:08:05Morning, headmistress.
0:08:06 > 0:08:10- Oh, it's you. Let me finish my tea. - Just doing the bins.
0:08:10 > 0:08:12Ah.
0:08:13 > 0:08:15Half a sticky bun in there.
0:08:16 > 0:08:17- Are you not having it?- No!
0:08:22 > 0:08:25- It's been there since last term! - It's a bit dry.
0:08:27 > 0:08:30Anyway, I just wanted to say...
0:08:30 > 0:08:32- Do you mind if I sit? - Yes, I do mind.
0:08:32 > 0:08:35I just wanted to say a big thanks for giving me a second chance
0:08:35 > 0:08:37after my...interlude.
0:08:37 > 0:08:39Well, sadly, these days one can't sack someone for going...
0:08:39 > 0:08:41SHE CACKLES MANIACALLY
0:08:42 > 0:08:47- No. No. Else I'd have been out of a job years ago.- Mmm.
0:08:47 > 0:08:49I won't lie to you, headmistress,
0:08:49 > 0:08:51I've been going through a tough time of it.
0:08:51 > 0:08:52I think it all started...
0:08:52 > 0:08:56Would you mind having this conversation outside?
0:08:56 > 0:08:57Of course.
0:09:04 > 0:09:06It all started when the wife changed the locks.
0:09:06 > 0:09:08She sold all my stuff on eBay and forced me
0:09:08 > 0:09:10to live in a caravan at the bottom of the garden.
0:09:10 > 0:09:12CHATTER
0:09:13 > 0:09:15Right, Gunn's in the house!
0:09:17 > 0:09:20There's a lot of different classrooms in this school, ain't there?
0:09:20 > 0:09:23Right...joegraffy.
0:09:24 > 0:09:26Rain comes down from the clouds, turns into sea.
0:09:29 > 0:09:33Wind blows it back up again - water cycle. Boom!
0:09:33 > 0:09:35Right, what else do you need to know for your CGCSEs?
0:09:35 > 0:09:38Mr Barber was going to teach us about the Ice Age.
0:09:38 > 0:09:41Right, the Ice Age. Ice Age... A while back, weren't it?
0:09:42 > 0:09:47Nippy. It's a lot of black ice - that's lethal.
0:09:47 > 0:09:49I mean, that's what killed the dinosaurs.
0:09:49 > 0:09:51- You don't know anything about it, do you, sir?- I do, actually!
0:09:51 > 0:09:54Hang on a minute, I'll have a little, um, little think.
0:09:54 > 0:09:56Ahem. Ice Age.
0:09:56 > 0:09:59Right - it's a sloth, a woolly mammoth, a sabre-tooth tiger,
0:09:59 > 0:10:01all team up in a... No, hang on, that's not right.
0:10:02 > 0:10:05Right, the Ice Age was a period of reduced...
0:10:07 > 0:10:11..global temperature resulting in the expansion
0:10:11 > 0:10:14of polar ice sheets and glaceers.
0:10:14 > 0:10:15There you go, nailed it!
0:10:15 > 0:10:18Eh? Come on then, throw another one at me!
0:10:18 > 0:10:19BELL RINGS
0:10:21 > 0:10:23Thanks for coming. See you again.
0:10:23 > 0:10:25Knock-knock-knock!
0:10:25 > 0:10:29- You all right, babes?- Oh, look at you! You look like a proper teacher.
0:10:29 > 0:10:32No, I am a proper teacher. This is my classroom.
0:10:32 > 0:10:34- Do you want a quick tour?- Yeah.
0:10:35 > 0:10:37Coastal erosion.
0:10:37 > 0:10:39- That's an oxbow lake... - Mm, yeah!
0:10:41 > 0:10:43Cross section of a Babybel.
0:10:43 > 0:10:44Yeah...
0:10:44 > 0:10:47- You at all interested in the Ice Age? - Not especially.
0:10:47 > 0:10:50Of all the ages, it's, er, it's probably my favourite.
0:10:50 > 0:10:53Hmm. It's a bit boring.
0:10:53 > 0:10:54I just wondered if you wouldn't mind
0:10:54 > 0:10:56putting up one of my posters in your classroom?
0:10:56 > 0:10:59No, of course, babes. "Which Way Now?"
0:10:59 > 0:11:02Yeah, you know, just thought I'd brand the day.
0:11:02 > 0:11:05Hopefully get it trending on Twitter. #sarahposternswhichwaynow.
0:11:05 > 0:11:06Yeah.
0:11:06 > 0:11:09No, I mean, I'd be up for one of your workshops.
0:11:09 > 0:11:12- You?- Well, yeah. - Well, um, actually nobody has
0:11:12 > 0:11:14put their name down for the CV workshop.
0:11:14 > 0:11:16Well, you count me in. I'd love to learn about CVs.
0:11:16 > 0:11:19- Yeah, teaching it. - Oh, you know, no, I knew that.
0:11:19 > 0:11:20Er, Sarah, can I have a word?
0:11:22 > 0:11:24- I'm right here.- In private.
0:11:24 > 0:11:25SHE SIGHS
0:11:25 > 0:11:27Yeah, no, it's fine, cos, um...
0:11:27 > 0:11:29cos I've got some joegraffy marking to do.
0:11:34 > 0:11:35What is it, Keith?
0:11:35 > 0:11:37I just feel I should be doing the CV workshop with you.
0:11:37 > 0:11:39It's too late, I've already asked Trevor.
0:11:39 > 0:11:41- I want to be part of your careers posse!- If you're doing this
0:11:41 > 0:11:44- to get back into my good books... - No, no, I genuinely think
0:11:44 > 0:11:47what you're doing with this careers day is inspirational.
0:11:47 > 0:11:51Well, teaching is just a tiny part of what Sarah Postern does.
0:11:51 > 0:11:53- You are Sarah Postern. - I know.
0:11:53 > 0:11:55These kids are at a crossroads.
0:11:55 > 0:11:57Do they carry on with their education,
0:11:57 > 0:12:00- or do they go and get a job? - It's more of a T-junction.
0:12:00 > 0:12:02But if there's anything I can do to help on Friday,
0:12:02 > 0:12:04anything at all, just let me know.
0:12:04 > 0:12:05Well...
0:12:05 > 0:12:08I still need someone to take part in the job interview role play...
0:12:08 > 0:12:10- Yes!- ..with Janine.- No!- Why?
0:12:10 > 0:12:12You know her and I don't get on.
0:12:12 > 0:12:15I try and take the moral high ground, but she is a total cow!
0:12:15 > 0:12:17Right, just forget it, Keith, OK?
0:12:17 > 0:12:19I will find somebody else to help me.
0:12:19 > 0:12:22Someone who actually cares about these young people's futures.
0:12:32 > 0:12:34HE MIMICS KNOCKING ON DOOR Please come in.
0:12:36 > 0:12:39Stop. Now, I didn't tell him to sit down.
0:12:39 > 0:12:42And in a job interview, that would be a complete no-no.
0:12:42 > 0:12:44Please go out and come back in again.
0:12:46 > 0:12:48He didn't close the door.
0:12:51 > 0:12:54- Come in!- I hadn't knocked yet - obviously that's a complete no-no.
0:12:54 > 0:12:56If you're interviewing someone for a job,
0:12:56 > 0:12:57you have to wait for them to knock.
0:13:01 > 0:13:02Come in.
0:13:07 > 0:13:08Sit down.
0:13:10 > 0:13:13- Good afternoon. I'm here about the job.- Which job?
0:13:15 > 0:13:17- I don't know. - An even bigger no-no.
0:13:17 > 0:13:19Always know which job you've applied for.
0:13:19 > 0:13:22You never told me what job it was! She never told me.
0:13:22 > 0:13:23Let's just say this is a bank
0:13:23 > 0:13:26and you're applying for the position of bank clerk.
0:13:26 > 0:13:29Tell me, what qualities do you have that would be suited
0:13:29 > 0:13:30to the role of bank clerk?
0:13:30 > 0:13:33Well, I'm equally comfortable working as an individual
0:13:33 > 0:13:37- or as part of a team... - Ring-ring! Ring-ring! Ring-ring!
0:13:37 > 0:13:40Excuse me.
0:13:40 > 0:13:42Hello, this is the bank, how can I help you?
0:13:44 > 0:13:46No! Dead?!
0:13:47 > 0:13:49Oh, but I only saw her this morning!
0:13:51 > 0:13:54Well... she'll sleep with the angels now.
0:14:02 > 0:14:05So, do you have any previous experience of working in a bank?
0:14:05 > 0:14:08- Yes.- Do you?- Yes. - What experience exactly?
0:14:08 > 0:14:11I've actually been working in banks for the past 25 years,
0:14:11 > 0:14:14where I've risen to the position of bank manager.
0:14:14 > 0:14:17In fact, I've been voted Bank Manager of the Year
0:14:17 > 0:14:19for the past five years running.
0:14:19 > 0:14:22Well, then you are overqualified for the job, good day!
0:14:22 > 0:14:26Right, let's end the scene there, shall we? Thank you both very much.
0:14:26 > 0:14:29Your thoughts. Where do you think Mr Church went wrong?
0:14:29 > 0:14:32I didn't go wrong, it was clear from the start I was
0:14:32 > 0:14:35- never going to get the job.- Miss, I think he made a bad first impression.
0:14:35 > 0:14:36Yes, we've covered that, thank you.
0:14:36 > 0:14:38Also, I think he's got an attitude problem, miss.
0:14:38 > 0:14:41A bad attitude is the biggest no-no.
0:14:41 > 0:14:43Well, you try it with her! See how you get on.
0:14:44 > 0:14:45OK.
0:14:58 > 0:14:59Come in!
0:15:02 > 0:15:03Please sit down.
0:15:05 > 0:15:07- Good afternoon. - You've got the job!
0:15:19 > 0:15:21Heard you ballsed up your workshop, Churchy.
0:15:21 > 0:15:23- No. I should have got that job. - Poor Sarah.
0:15:23 > 0:15:25Pours her heart and soul into this careers...
0:15:25 > 0:15:28thingy, then you come along and take a giant dump on it.
0:15:28 > 0:15:30If anyone's going to take a giant...
0:15:30 > 0:15:33deposit on today, it's you and your CV workshop.
0:15:33 > 0:15:36I bet you don't even know what CV stands for.
0:15:36 > 0:15:38- Yeah, I do. - Go on, then.
0:15:40 > 0:15:43- I'm going to go and get some dinner, going to run out of chips.- No.
0:15:45 > 0:15:48- Well, obviously the C stands for "careers".- Go on.
0:15:50 > 0:15:52V... Verdict... No.
0:15:54 > 0:15:58- Voucher. Vasectomy. - Careers vasectomy?
0:15:58 > 0:16:01- That's your final answer? - Can I phone a friend?
0:16:01 > 0:16:02It's curriculum vitae.
0:16:05 > 0:16:07I don't speak French.
0:16:13 > 0:16:16Just an autograph or a selfie.
0:16:16 > 0:16:18Sorry there's not time to do both. Selfie or autograph?
0:16:18 > 0:16:21Actually, I just need to get to my locker.
0:16:21 > 0:16:23Cool, cool. Just getting shizzle out of a locker.
0:16:23 > 0:16:26Keeping it real. Fist bump.
0:16:26 > 0:16:28OK, come on, get out of his way, get out of his way!
0:16:30 > 0:16:32Wow, Mr Rock Star!
0:16:32 > 0:16:35Yeah, to be honest this is the part of it I really hate.
0:16:35 > 0:16:36- The fame.- Yeah, that's the reason
0:16:36 > 0:16:39I don't want to become famous - the fame.
0:16:39 > 0:16:41Yeah, you're best off how you are. Completely anonymous.
0:16:41 > 0:16:43Tell that to my 78 Twitter followers.
0:16:44 > 0:16:47So, as it's your last day today, I have organised
0:16:47 > 0:16:50a little drinks party for you in the staff room at four o'clock.
0:16:50 > 0:16:53- Yeah, yeah, I'll try and swing by. - It's a party for you.
0:16:53 > 0:16:58- What time is it again and where?- It's at four o'clock in the staff room.
0:16:58 > 0:16:59Hmm...put me down as a maybe.
0:16:59 > 0:17:02- HIGH-PITCHED VOICE:- Well, it'll be a teensy bit embarrassing
0:17:02 > 0:17:04for me if you don't come!
0:17:04 > 0:17:06HIGH-PITCHED VOICE: Yes, but I'm quite famous now,
0:17:06 > 0:17:08so I don't know if I want to come.
0:17:08 > 0:17:12- But it is a party for you! - OK, but I can't stay long.
0:17:12 > 0:17:13Thank you!
0:17:14 > 0:17:18- NORMAL VOICE:- I'll see you later. - NORMAL VOICE: Yeah, see you later.
0:17:28 > 0:17:31- Are you all right there, Mr Hubble? - These kippers are off.
0:17:34 > 0:17:36KNOCK ON WINDOW
0:17:36 > 0:17:38Oi! Lads!
0:17:38 > 0:17:39Oh, hello, caretaker.
0:17:39 > 0:17:43I'm starving. Haven't eaten since Tuesday, and that was a conker.
0:17:43 > 0:17:45Could I borrow some of those fish fingers?
0:17:49 > 0:17:51I've got none left.
0:17:51 > 0:17:53Keith, please. I'm going to faint.
0:18:01 > 0:18:03Just dunk it in the ketchup.
0:18:08 > 0:18:10Careful of my fingers!
0:18:10 > 0:18:12I'm ready for the next one now.
0:18:13 > 0:18:16Right! It's time for my session with Sarah.
0:18:16 > 0:18:18Er, maybe I should come and supervise.
0:18:18 > 0:18:20Hang on, I haven't had dessert yet.
0:18:22 > 0:18:24MR BARBER MUNCHES
0:18:27 > 0:18:32First rule of CVs - don't be afraid to lie.
0:18:32 > 0:18:35Oh, sorry - didn't want to stop you so soon...
0:18:35 > 0:18:39- Just as I was getting going, babes. - Mmm, just a small correction.
0:18:39 > 0:18:43- You must never lie on a CV.- Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, no, you don't lie.
0:18:43 > 0:18:45But, I mean, you can knock your grades up a little bit.
0:18:45 > 0:18:47OK. Stop you again.
0:18:47 > 0:18:50You must definitely never "knock your grades up a bit".
0:18:50 > 0:18:52- Why not? - Because it's wrong...
0:18:52 > 0:18:56- and employers can check up on them. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. All right.
0:18:56 > 0:18:58- Sorry, are you sure? - I'm sure.
0:19:00 > 0:19:03Bollocks. No, I'll say it was a typo.
0:19:03 > 0:19:05Anyway, at the end of the day, it don't matter what your grades are.
0:19:05 > 0:19:07The most important thing is you got a good hobby.
0:19:07 > 0:19:09Not a boring one. So, you, what's your hobby?
0:19:09 > 0:19:12- I play the violin. - No, that's boring. What about you?
0:19:12 > 0:19:14- Astronomy. - So boring. What about you?
0:19:14 > 0:19:16- I collect coins.- We've all got change, mate, that's not a hobby.
0:19:16 > 0:19:18But mine are from all around the world.
0:19:18 > 0:19:21Well, get yourself down to Thomas Cook and they'll change 'em for you.
0:19:21 > 0:19:23We need something exciting, something that'll get you a job!
0:19:23 > 0:19:26- What you put down, babes, modelling? - Oh.
0:19:26 > 0:19:28Well, that's kind, but, um, no.
0:19:28 > 0:19:30- You must've been quite fit when you were younger?- Still am young.
0:19:30 > 0:19:32Er...what did I put down?
0:19:32 > 0:19:37Well, obviously, my extensive charity work, er...French cinema.
0:19:37 > 0:19:39- Blueys? - Art house films.
0:19:39 > 0:19:42And I also put down that I speak five languages.
0:19:43 > 0:19:45- Do you?- Yeah!
0:19:45 > 0:19:46All right, which ones?
0:19:48 > 0:19:51- English. - Well, yeah, obviously.
0:19:51 > 0:19:53- French. - Hmm. That's two.
0:19:53 > 0:19:54Spanish.
0:19:55 > 0:19:58German. And...
0:19:58 > 0:20:00Chinese.
0:20:00 > 0:20:04- You speak Chinese? - Yes, it says so on my CV.
0:20:04 > 0:20:05Go on, then - do a bit.
0:20:12 > 0:20:20SHE SPEAKS UNCONVINCING FAKE CHINESE
0:20:24 > 0:20:26Right. So it's all right to lie a bit.
0:20:30 > 0:20:31PHONE RINGS
0:20:35 > 0:20:40So! To bring careers day to a close, we now have a very special guest.
0:20:40 > 0:20:44We were at teacher training college together, but she took
0:20:44 > 0:20:47a different path to me and she now
0:20:47 > 0:20:49writes very successful books for children...
0:20:49 > 0:20:51- Young adults. - Young adults.
0:20:51 > 0:20:54- Selling over two million... - Three million.
0:20:54 > 0:20:58Three million books, please give a very big Greybridge welcome
0:20:58 > 0:21:00to Fenella Forbes!
0:21:07 > 0:21:10- Thanks for that little intro, Susan.- Sarah.
0:21:10 > 0:21:12Oh, sorry, there were two ginger ones at college
0:21:12 > 0:21:15and I can never remember which one's which.
0:21:15 > 0:21:17- Well, Susan was the fat one. - Fatter, yeah.
0:21:18 > 0:21:20So, first question.
0:21:20 > 0:21:26What does it take to be a successful chil... Young adults' author?
0:21:26 > 0:21:30- Very simple - an original idea. - And what was yours?
0:21:30 > 0:21:32A school for witches.
0:21:32 > 0:21:34Hmm. It's quite similar to Harry Potter.
0:21:34 > 0:21:37That's a school for wizards. Mine's a school for witches.
0:21:37 > 0:21:39Oh, forgive me.
0:21:39 > 0:21:43Question two - how did you get your big break as a writer?
0:21:43 > 0:21:47Because a lot of it is luck, isn't it?
0:21:47 > 0:21:51- I always say you make your own luck. - That's what lucky people say.
0:21:51 > 0:21:54- Well, my father-in-law ran a publishing company...- Lucky!
0:21:54 > 0:21:57He had a look and he said it was - in his own words -
0:21:57 > 0:22:00the most original debut novel he'd ever read.
0:22:00 > 0:22:02Obviously hadn't heard of Harry Potter.
0:22:02 > 0:22:04- And the rest, as they say, is history.- The Second World War
0:22:04 > 0:22:07is history, this is really just a series of books for children.
0:22:07 > 0:22:09- Young adults.- Children. - Are we going to
0:22:09 > 0:22:10get on with the book signing or...?
0:22:10 > 0:22:16No. Question three - how much money do you get for each book sold?
0:22:16 > 0:22:17Er, it's not about the money at all,
0:22:17 > 0:22:19it's about doing something you love.
0:22:19 > 0:22:22- £1 a book?- Bit more than that. - That's obscene.
0:22:22 > 0:22:25So there you are, kids, money isn't important,
0:22:25 > 0:22:27according to the multi-millionaire.
0:22:27 > 0:22:29So, let's open it up to your questions.
0:22:31 > 0:22:33- Yes?- In your next book, will Whitney the Witch get eaten
0:22:33 > 0:22:34by the Dragon Headmistress?
0:22:34 > 0:22:36The only way you'll find out is by buying the book.
0:22:36 > 0:22:39Whitney's not going to be killed off, Nicholas,
0:22:39 > 0:22:41not until every penny of your pocket money is in her bank account.
0:22:41 > 0:22:43Next!
0:22:43 > 0:22:45So will there ever be a Whitney the Witch film?
0:22:45 > 0:22:47I think we'd all love to see Whitney
0:22:47 > 0:22:49- on the big screen, wouldn't we? PUPILS:- Yeah.
0:22:49 > 0:22:52Hmm, you certainly would - buy yourself a well-earned yacht.
0:22:52 > 0:22:53Anyone else?
0:22:53 > 0:22:55Could I borrow £72,000?
0:22:55 > 0:22:57LAUGHTER
0:22:57 > 0:23:00Well, let's... Let's just wrap up, shall we?
0:23:00 > 0:23:04- I do have one final question. - Well, let's make it the last one.
0:23:04 > 0:23:08Fenella, we both trained together but I just wondered,
0:23:08 > 0:23:11do you ever regret not becoming a teacher?
0:23:11 > 0:23:13- Well... - Uh-uh-uh, let me finish.
0:23:13 > 0:23:18Because every day in my job, I get to shape
0:23:18 > 0:23:20young people's lives for the better.
0:23:22 > 0:23:24Well, that's... Shh. Ahem.
0:23:24 > 0:23:27And what could be more important than that?
0:23:29 > 0:23:31Your answer, please.
0:23:31 > 0:23:34Well, it's interesting you say that, because sometimes,
0:23:34 > 0:23:39I do feel that being a teacher is the most important job you can do.
0:23:41 > 0:23:44Thank you.
0:23:44 > 0:23:48But then I think - what I do is so much more important.
0:23:48 > 0:23:52Because I shape the lives of young people, but on a global scale.
0:23:57 > 0:23:59Right, let's sign some books.
0:24:28 > 0:24:32- Are you all right, Sarah? - Oh. It's just been a difficult day.
0:24:34 > 0:24:37Luke's leaving us to become a pop star.
0:24:37 > 0:24:39Someone I was at teacher training college with
0:24:39 > 0:24:42now has a Chanel handbag. And where am I?
0:24:44 > 0:24:47I mean, all day it's been "Sarah Postern's Which Way Now?",
0:24:47 > 0:24:49but it should've been "Which way now, Sarah Postern?"
0:24:50 > 0:24:52- You are Sarah Postern.- I know.
0:24:55 > 0:24:57I feel like I'm at a crossroads...
0:24:57 > 0:24:59a T-junction.
0:24:59 > 0:25:01Should I carry on teaching...
0:25:01 > 0:25:04or should I write a bestselling series of children's novels?
0:25:06 > 0:25:08Carry on teaching.
0:25:08 > 0:25:09Well...
0:25:11 > 0:25:13- ..I suppose I do have this gift for it.- You really do.
0:25:15 > 0:25:17Plus, I think you'd find writing the
0:25:17 > 0:25:20bestselling series of children's novels quite hard.
0:25:22 > 0:25:24But I know if you left,
0:25:24 > 0:25:28you'd leave a massive hole in the hearts of everyone at Greybridge.
0:25:29 > 0:25:32- Especially me. - Thank you, Keith.
0:25:39 > 0:25:42Hey! What are we all crying about?
0:25:45 > 0:25:49LUKE: # I see the same old faces every day
0:25:49 > 0:25:54ON CD PLAYER: # Every time I look, they're getting old and grey... #
0:26:01 > 0:26:03'Scuse me, Jo.
0:26:03 > 0:26:05# I'm going to soar... #
0:26:05 > 0:26:08Yeah, I've been loving this careers day, Sarah.
0:26:08 > 0:26:09Oh, good. That's good.
0:26:09 > 0:26:11It's given me a clear idea of what I'd like to be.
0:26:11 > 0:26:13- What's that? - A wacky weatherman.
0:26:13 > 0:26:17I think I'd be very good at cheering people up in the morning.
0:26:17 > 0:26:20Good luck with that. Er, I have to go and mingle.
0:26:20 > 0:26:22Oh, Miss Baron!
0:26:22 > 0:26:26How wonderful that you're here, I really didn't expect you to come.
0:26:26 > 0:26:27Sadly, I can't stay.
0:26:33 > 0:26:37- Hello, Daphne. - Hi, Sarah. Shame you're leaving us.
0:26:37 > 0:26:39I know the headmistress can't stand you,
0:26:39 > 0:26:42but I've always quite liked you.
0:26:42 > 0:26:45It's actually Luke's leaving party.
0:26:45 > 0:26:49Oh, right. That's a shame, she likes him.
0:26:49 > 0:26:53- HIGH-PITCHED VOICE: - Oh, here's the pop star!
0:26:53 > 0:26:55- Can we not do the voice any more? It's quite annoying.- Yeah.
0:26:55 > 0:26:58Look, I just wanted to say good luck with everything.
0:26:58 > 0:27:01And don't forget all your friends here at Greybridge!
0:27:01 > 0:27:02Never forget the little people.
0:27:02 > 0:27:03PHONE VIBRATES
0:27:03 > 0:27:06- And...- I've got to take this, it's my manager.
0:27:06 > 0:27:07Should have a chart update.
0:27:07 > 0:27:12Shh! It's his manager with a chart update!
0:27:12 > 0:27:14Django! What's up?
0:27:14 > 0:27:17No, just at some crappy party.
0:27:17 > 0:27:18So, er, how's Soar doing?
0:27:20 > 0:27:24- Nine?!- Oh, my God, we have a pop star at the party!
0:27:24 > 0:27:27He is number nine in the charts!
0:27:28 > 0:27:31No. No, no... I've, um...
0:27:31 > 0:27:32sold nine copies.
0:27:36 > 0:27:40Django, what happened?! I gave you £700!
0:27:40 > 0:27:43Right, we'll see you on Monday morning then...Barry Barlow.
0:27:45 > 0:27:48- Nine copies.- I know.
0:27:48 > 0:27:49What a disaster.
0:27:51 > 0:27:54Still, it's really perked me up.
0:28:04 > 0:28:05Got your stratas.
0:28:05 > 0:28:08And your big one there, they're just called big clouds.
0:28:08 > 0:28:12We have a new teacher. And, yes, he just happens to be blind.
0:28:12 > 0:28:14- It's Keith Church.- Hi.
0:28:14 > 0:28:17- And I'm in the dining hall. - Yes, I realise that.
0:28:17 > 0:28:19We all call her Piggy Postern
0:28:19 > 0:28:21because she has an upturned nose like a pig.
0:28:21 > 0:28:23Do you mind if I just...?
0:28:23 > 0:28:25I think we should see Dr Dalton for what he is -
0:28:25 > 0:28:27a cool teacher who just happens to be blind.
0:28:27 > 0:28:29- Visually impaired. - Visually impaired.
0:28:29 > 0:28:31Just ease it backwards.
0:28:31 > 0:28:33ENGINE ROARS
0:28:33 > 0:28:36Bugger.
0:28:36 > 0:28:42# When I think about the days there is something of a haze about it
0:28:42 > 0:28:46# No, we're not the same
0:28:46 > 0:28:48# But let's not break the chain
0:28:50 > 0:28:54# We should play this game together. #