Birth of Rock

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0:00:02 > 0:00:04This programme contains strong language

0:00:04 > 0:00:06Over 40 years, I've been making and playing music

0:00:06 > 0:00:08to audiences all over the world.

0:00:08 > 0:00:11Both as lead singer of Thotch and as a solo artist.

0:00:14 > 0:00:15I invented world music.

0:00:15 > 0:00:18HE SINGS IN SPANISH

0:00:18 > 0:00:22I was the first musician to use Plasticine in videos.

0:00:22 > 0:00:24The first magician to record with animals.

0:00:26 > 0:00:28My last album had the lowest bass line ever recorded.

0:00:28 > 0:00:29VERY LOW NOTE PLAYS

0:00:29 > 0:00:32Long before Bob Geldof and Bono,

0:00:32 > 0:00:34I was staging charity concerts

0:00:34 > 0:00:37and writing songs to raise awareness for the helpless and the hopeless.

0:00:37 > 0:00:39# Why no Black folk in Jersey?

0:00:39 > 0:00:42# Why no Black folk in Sark?

0:00:42 > 0:00:44# Why no Black folk in Guernsey?

0:00:44 > 0:00:47# Are they having a lark? #

0:00:47 > 0:00:49This is the Life Of Rock, with me Brian Pern.

0:01:12 > 0:01:14MIDDLE EASTERN MUSIC PLAYS

0:01:18 > 0:01:21But what always fascinates me is where it all began.

0:01:21 > 0:01:24What is the meaning of this life we call rock'n'roll?

0:01:24 > 0:01:27To find out, you have to go right back to the dawn of time,

0:01:27 > 0:01:30to the birth of man and the birth of music.

0:01:32 > 0:01:34Hello, I'm here with Mr Dan Cruickshank,

0:01:34 > 0:01:36one of the world's foremost historians.

0:01:36 > 0:01:38We're deep underground in a cave in the Middle East.

0:01:38 > 0:01:41There's been a pretty amazing discovery. Dan.

0:01:41 > 0:01:42Right, well, here it is.

0:01:42 > 0:01:47These wall paintings date from about 70,000 years ago.

0:01:47 > 0:01:49As far as we know,

0:01:49 > 0:01:53this is the earliest depiction of homo sapiens making music.

0:01:53 > 0:01:55This chap here, as you can see,

0:01:55 > 0:01:58is playing some sort of wind instrument.

0:02:00 > 0:02:04Here, this rather Neanderthal-looking fellow on percussion -

0:02:04 > 0:02:05the drummer.

0:02:05 > 0:02:10Here, this man, is playing the stringed instrument.

0:02:10 > 0:02:12What sort of music would they have played?

0:02:12 > 0:02:13We had no idea

0:02:13 > 0:02:19until recently, archaeologists found this sequence of symbols.

0:02:19 > 0:02:21- Here they are.- Wow.

0:02:21 > 0:02:23One assumes they are musical notes.

0:02:23 > 0:02:28Only yesterday, scientists at the Shazam Institute in USA

0:02:28 > 0:02:33developed software to transcribe the sequence.

0:02:33 > 0:02:35My gosh. What's that over there?

0:02:36 > 0:02:38Oh, that's a bloody Banksy.

0:02:38 > 0:02:41That clown gets absolutely everywhere.

0:02:44 > 0:02:45By the time I arrived back in London,

0:02:45 > 0:02:49the chaps at Shazam had completed their findings

0:02:49 > 0:02:52and sent them through to one of our greatest pianists.

0:02:52 > 0:02:56He would be playing these musical notes for the very first time.

0:02:56 > 0:02:58PIANO PLAYS

0:02:58 > 0:02:59OK, can you stop that?

0:02:59 > 0:03:01- Sorry.- Thanks.- Sorry.

0:03:01 > 0:03:02Ready?

0:03:02 > 0:03:05OK, so these are the actual notes that were transcribed

0:03:05 > 0:03:11from the cave illustrations we found in Oman - over 70,000 years old.

0:03:11 > 0:03:13I have Mr Jools Holland here.

0:03:13 > 0:03:14Julian Holland.

0:03:14 > 0:03:17Jools, I'd like you to play that for us the best you can.

0:03:17 > 0:03:18I'd love to try and play this.

0:03:18 > 0:03:20You know, of course, there are...

0:03:20 > 0:03:25This is 70,000-year-old transcription. There is a...

0:03:25 > 0:03:27The oldest recording on Earth is Roman,

0:03:27 > 0:03:30it's not known by a lot of people.

0:03:30 > 0:03:34The Roman potters would sign the inside of their vases

0:03:34 > 0:03:37with a needle as the pot was being rotated.

0:03:37 > 0:03:40When these shattered vases, taken from the British Museum,

0:03:40 > 0:03:42are reconstructed and put on the right equipment,

0:03:42 > 0:03:45which I think the Russians have done now,

0:03:45 > 0:03:48you can hear the crackling, ancient sounds of the market.

0:03:48 > 0:03:51There's no music. It's just the "For sale" and things like this.

0:03:51 > 0:03:54I don't know if you were aware of that.

0:03:54 > 0:03:55No. Let's do this now.

0:03:55 > 0:03:57- Just play this?- Yeah.- OK.

0:03:57 > 0:03:58Hang on.

0:04:05 > 0:04:06Oh.

0:04:06 > 0:04:09HE PLAYS EASTENDERS THEME TUNE

0:04:14 > 0:04:16Is that a bit like EastEnders, isn't it?

0:04:16 > 0:04:17DOOF DOOF

0:04:22 > 0:04:26For thousands of years, rock lay dormant within man.

0:04:26 > 0:04:31Humans got their kicks out of what we now know as classical music.

0:04:31 > 0:04:34It wasn't until the 20th century when all that changed.

0:04:34 > 0:04:38Meet the parents of rock - folk, jazz and blues.

0:04:41 > 0:04:42The Mississippi.

0:04:42 > 0:04:45It is amazing to think this primordial swamp

0:04:45 > 0:04:47gave birth to the 12-bar blues -

0:04:47 > 0:04:50the nucleus of rock'n'roll as we know it.

0:04:50 > 0:04:52Basically, white people heard the blues

0:04:52 > 0:04:55created in the Deep South on their radios and copied it,

0:04:55 > 0:04:59made it slightly worse, then cashed in big time.

0:04:59 > 0:05:01# All we've got... #

0:05:01 > 0:05:03The great-grandfather of the blues movement was

0:05:03 > 0:05:05Toddy 'Biscuit Barrel" Burnett.

0:05:05 > 0:05:09# I don't want to run, babe

0:05:11 > 0:05:14# I'm hunted

0:05:14 > 0:05:16# I'm hunted

0:05:16 > 0:05:18# I'm missing my wife... #

0:05:18 > 0:05:20Toddy's one of the great originators.

0:05:20 > 0:05:24I think without him, music wouldn't be quite the same as it is today.

0:05:28 > 0:05:29My, oh, my.

0:05:30 > 0:05:32This is Toddy 'Biscuit Barrel' Burnett...

0:05:34 > 0:05:37..who was essentially the guy that taught all the guys,

0:05:37 > 0:05:39all the top blues guys.

0:05:39 > 0:05:43Howlin' Wolf, Sonny Boy Williamson, Robert Johnson, Bo Diddley.

0:05:43 > 0:05:46This guy taught them the rudiments of blues guitar.

0:05:46 > 0:05:48Now he's destitute, he's homeless.

0:05:48 > 0:05:53Toddy, it's Brian Pern here. I e-mailed you.

0:05:53 > 0:05:55I didn't get any reply.

0:05:55 > 0:05:59How do you feel about bands like the Rolling Stones stealing your music?

0:06:04 > 0:06:05Then there was jazz.

0:06:05 > 0:06:07HE SCATS

0:06:09 > 0:06:11When jazz and blues were mixed together,

0:06:11 > 0:06:13it created a whole new melting pot -

0:06:13 > 0:06:16a kind of rhythm and blues rock ratatouille.

0:06:16 > 0:06:19All sorts of new genres were served up.

0:06:19 > 0:06:21There was the traditional jazz, there was the modern jazz,

0:06:21 > 0:06:23then there was the beebop.

0:06:23 > 0:06:26Little wop, big wop, do-wop. Trad-de-wop.

0:06:26 > 0:06:29You had the skiffle music, there was even skaffle.

0:06:29 > 0:06:30Skoffle.

0:06:30 > 0:06:35- Tofu.- Trad, skoffle beat. Skaffle, falafel.- Trad tofu.

0:06:35 > 0:06:36Piffle-poddle, widdle.

0:06:38 > 0:06:40We did quite a lot of widdling, actually.

0:06:40 > 0:06:42But the most thoughtful and simplistic

0:06:42 > 0:06:44of the three fathers of rock was folk.

0:06:48 > 0:06:51Folk was a back-to-basics musical strata.

0:06:51 > 0:06:54All you needed was an acoustic guitar,

0:06:54 > 0:06:57some vaguely left-wing views and unkempt pubic hair.

0:06:57 > 0:07:00Folk musicians smoked Boar's Head tobacco,

0:07:00 > 0:07:01and they drank real ales

0:07:01 > 0:07:05like Parson's Punnet, Dog Bolter and Bench.

0:07:09 > 0:07:10DOG HOWLS

0:07:12 > 0:07:16HOWLING CONTINUES

0:07:16 > 0:07:19Bob Dylan, or Robert Zimmerman, is without doubt

0:07:19 > 0:07:22probably the greatest singer-songwriter of all time.

0:07:22 > 0:07:24Mind you, I saw him last year in London

0:07:24 > 0:07:28and it sounded like somebody had thrown a hairdryer in the bath.

0:07:28 > 0:07:31When Dylan plugged in, we plugged out.

0:07:31 > 0:07:33- SLURRING:- I remember him. - Yes, you do.- He went electric.

0:07:33 > 0:07:35He was gas before that.

0:07:36 > 0:07:39At these festivals, as people plugged in,

0:07:39 > 0:07:41they also plugged on to something else -

0:07:41 > 0:07:43LSD.

0:07:48 > 0:07:51But for every up, there came a down.

0:08:02 > 0:08:04HE SCREAMS

0:08:04 > 0:08:07I can't stand the confusion in my mind!

0:08:07 > 0:08:12My first tab of LSD - I dropped it.

0:08:12 > 0:08:13I picked it up.

0:08:18 > 0:08:22It was almost as if the children of jazz, blues and folk had an orgy,

0:08:22 > 0:08:26and an incestuous offspring was born into the world.

0:08:26 > 0:08:28That offspring was rock music.

0:08:30 > 0:08:32As rock music grew,

0:08:32 > 0:08:35like a teenager it became more aware of its appearance

0:08:35 > 0:08:38and no longer wanted to resemble what it had come from.

0:08:38 > 0:08:40Suddenly, it was all about image.

0:08:40 > 0:08:42# There's a star man

0:08:42 > 0:08:44# Waiting in the sky... #

0:08:44 > 0:08:46Star Man? I played piano on that.

0:08:51 > 0:08:53Well, course David Bowie came on on Star Man.

0:08:53 > 0:08:56Maybe it should have gone a bit more like this.

0:09:02 > 0:09:05In his myriad guises, he took stagecraft to new limits -

0:09:05 > 0:09:10borrowing from Marcel Marceau, Lindsay Kemp, Nosferatu,

0:09:10 > 0:09:12Popeye and Sally Gunnell.

0:09:12 > 0:09:14Put simply - he's one of the greats.

0:09:14 > 0:09:17But in the old days, he would go down your pockets

0:09:17 > 0:09:18and steal your fags.

0:09:20 > 0:09:22Although David Bowie may have pioneered glam rock,

0:09:22 > 0:09:24others were hot on his high heels.

0:09:29 > 0:09:31# What's her name, Virginia Plain? #

0:09:31 > 0:09:33Virginia Plain? I played piano on that.

0:09:35 > 0:09:37Virginia Plain was another legendary record,

0:09:37 > 0:09:40but maybe it should have gone a bit more like this.

0:09:45 > 0:09:48Then, of course, there was Thotch.

0:09:48 > 0:09:49- Thotch.- Thotch.

0:09:49 > 0:09:51- Thotch.- Thotch.- Thotch.

0:09:51 > 0:09:53- Thotch.- The Thotch.- Thotch. - - Thotch.

0:09:53 > 0:09:54- Thotch.- Thotch.

0:09:54 > 0:09:56- Yes, I'd agree. Thotch.- Thotch.

0:09:56 > 0:09:59Good evening, everybody. Welcome to the Anglesey Pavilion.

0:09:59 > 0:10:01While we're just tuning up between the songs,

0:10:01 > 0:10:04I'd like to introduce you to Thotch the band.

0:10:04 > 0:10:07First of all on double-necked guitar, Mr Pat Quid.

0:10:08 > 0:10:12I was very unfortunate in that I was born to very wealthy

0:10:12 > 0:10:18and very loving parents. I never wanted for anything.

0:10:18 > 0:10:19I think that's held me back.

0:10:19 > 0:10:24I wish, to some extent, that I'd had a more difficult upbringing

0:10:24 > 0:10:30involving abuse, lack of love and penury.

0:10:30 > 0:10:33On bass, we have John. On Drums we have Dave.

0:10:34 > 0:10:35Mike.

0:10:44 > 0:10:50Whilst at Stowe, I had the good fortune to meet two chaps

0:10:50 > 0:10:55who'd had the similar misfortune as I'd had growing up,

0:10:55 > 0:10:57in that they both had unconditional love

0:10:57 > 0:10:59and wanted for nothing financially.

0:10:59 > 0:11:05That was Brian Pern and Tony PebblE or Pebble as he was then.

0:11:05 > 0:11:08On keyboards we have Mr Tony PebblE.

0:11:08 > 0:11:13It's PebblE with an acute, you know...Huguenots.

0:11:13 > 0:11:1616th century Protestant France. Doesn't matter, bollocks.

0:11:16 > 0:11:18Anyway, it's PebblE.

0:11:18 > 0:11:23I remember going to Putney to see The Yardbirds and Long John Baldry.

0:11:26 > 0:11:29You just couldn't move for twat.

0:11:29 > 0:11:31I don't remember anything about the music.

0:11:31 > 0:11:32I just remember all those beautiful birds.

0:11:32 > 0:11:35I went home and I started practising.

0:11:40 > 0:11:41Thotch was always complicated.

0:11:41 > 0:11:45We were part of a wave of public school bands.

0:11:45 > 0:11:47That's a bit embarrassing.

0:11:47 > 0:11:52We wrote about our environment, which was largely bucolic,

0:11:52 > 0:11:54pastoral, dark side.

0:11:54 > 0:11:55# We ran, we flew

0:11:55 > 0:11:57# We danced, we laughed

0:11:57 > 0:11:59# We drive, we jumped... #

0:11:59 > 0:12:05The pretentiousness of that band, yeah, used to make me want to...

0:12:05 > 0:12:07I can't even say.

0:12:07 > 0:12:09Thotch weren't that intelligent.

0:12:09 > 0:12:11They weren't as intelligent as we were.

0:12:11 > 0:12:13Brian did build his guitar out of a fireplace.

0:12:15 > 0:12:19John built his guitar out of a large fireplace.

0:12:20 > 0:12:23Freddie built his piano out of a fireplace.

0:12:24 > 0:12:27I built my drums out of a fireplace. You know.

0:12:28 > 0:12:30They weren't that intelligent.

0:12:30 > 0:12:35Grown men. Grown fucking men singing songs about worms and fairies.

0:12:35 > 0:12:37Oh, do me a favour, will you, mate? For God's sake.

0:12:37 > 0:12:41While the band are tuning up, I'd like to just tell you a quick story.

0:12:41 > 0:12:42Once upon a time there was a fox.

0:12:42 > 0:12:46He was being chased by a pack of hounds along a dry riverbed....

0:12:46 > 0:12:48I used to get very bored at some of those gigs.

0:12:48 > 0:12:50Brian would enlarge on a theme and really go off piste.

0:12:50 > 0:12:55Christ, he could babble on for 25 minutes, more.

0:12:55 > 0:12:59I would nip out for a fag and get my knob polished.

0:12:59 > 0:13:00Oi!

0:13:02 > 0:13:04And the hounds were terrified.

0:13:04 > 0:13:08This song is called Onion Divorce.

0:13:08 > 0:13:09The costumes came about by accident.

0:13:09 > 0:13:12You have to remember this was the peak of prog rock.

0:13:12 > 0:13:16The Oyster Catcher's Owl, for example, was six sides long.

0:13:16 > 0:13:19It featured a five minute bass pedal solo alone.

0:13:19 > 0:13:24Brian would come on, prancing around in whatever had taken his fancy,

0:13:24 > 0:13:27a feathery thing. To make it more interesting.

0:13:27 > 0:13:29I felt it detracted from the music

0:13:29 > 0:13:32and lost sight of the nuances of the solo.

0:13:32 > 0:13:34It caused a lot of friction.

0:13:38 > 0:13:41We were very serious, dedicated musicians.

0:13:41 > 0:13:45We weren't interested in a visual representation of what we were.

0:13:45 > 0:13:47We thought the music spoke for itself.

0:13:47 > 0:13:49HE WAILS

0:13:52 > 0:13:53Brian obviously didn't.

0:13:54 > 0:13:57HE WAILS

0:14:04 > 0:14:06WAILING CONTINUES

0:14:09 > 0:14:13Brian was obsessed with dressing up. Even at Stowe -

0:14:13 > 0:14:18any excuse to shove an animal on his head. He'd just do it. Bosh.

0:14:18 > 0:14:21WAILING

0:14:24 > 0:14:29For Brian it was about prosthetic claws, noses, beaks,

0:14:29 > 0:14:32teeth, ears, feathers.

0:14:45 > 0:14:49Every single costume from the '70s come from here, from me.

0:14:49 > 0:14:52It was all me. Brian had a lot of...

0:14:52 > 0:14:57A lot of looks, a lot of different birds he liked to put on his head.

0:14:57 > 0:15:02So I knew this poacher who could get me some really, really good stuff.

0:15:02 > 0:15:04When he was sort of time, I'd ring him up, we'd go down London Zoo

0:15:04 > 0:15:06and he'd...one of the...

0:15:06 > 0:15:10I mean, don't tell him. Stuff with stuffing and we'd put it on his head.

0:15:10 > 0:15:12These days you couldn't do that.

0:15:12 > 0:15:14We killed a panda once.

0:15:14 > 0:15:16As musicians became more sophisticated,

0:15:16 > 0:15:18so did the production values.

0:15:18 > 0:15:22Producers became just as innovative as their subjects.

0:15:22 > 0:15:24Phil Spector created his Wall of Sound.

0:15:24 > 0:15:27George Martin created his Wall of Beatle.

0:15:27 > 0:15:30Ray Thomas created his Multi-track Shenanigans.

0:15:33 > 0:15:36DISTORTED MUSIC

0:15:46 > 0:15:49This is actually a little hard for me right now,

0:15:49 > 0:15:53because obviously I've worked a lot in music - a lot of headphones.

0:15:53 > 0:15:59I'm now 97% deaf. I don't hear all the tone, but...

0:15:59 > 0:16:02LOUD SYNTHESISED CHOIR

0:16:02 > 0:16:04You have a very special way of recording.

0:16:04 > 0:16:06- How did you get that sound? - Ah, well, interesting.

0:16:06 > 0:16:09So we started with a high-hat.

0:16:09 > 0:16:10If you come over here.

0:16:13 > 0:16:17We'll augment that with some toms,

0:16:17 > 0:16:20which are just here.

0:16:20 > 0:16:26Two toms. Then, if you come over here, we'll have another cymbal.

0:16:26 > 0:16:27We'll have a side cymbal.

0:16:27 > 0:16:30- Have we got another chair? - Actually, I'll...

0:16:31 > 0:16:36Can you? I took one tom down. That was what I did.

0:16:36 > 0:16:38Then I doubled this tom.

0:16:38 > 0:16:40That's not actually a tom-tom sound though.

0:16:40 > 0:16:41CHICKEN CLUCKS

0:16:41 > 0:16:43- Isn't it?- No, it's mislabelled.

0:16:43 > 0:16:45And you can also here an egg,

0:16:45 > 0:16:48which actually doesn't really make a sound,

0:16:48 > 0:16:51but we still put up a mic to an egg.

0:16:51 > 0:16:52SILENCE

0:16:54 > 0:16:55Pretty good.

0:16:59 > 0:17:00If folk and progressive rock

0:17:00 > 0:17:03were the thoughtful and intelligent children of jazz and blues,

0:17:03 > 0:17:06the one that sat about in the bedroom smoking dope all day

0:17:06 > 0:17:07was reggae.

0:17:09 > 0:17:12Although people claimed that Bob Marley, Aswad or Ace Of Base

0:17:12 > 0:17:15were pioneers of this form, I wouldn't be so sure.

0:17:15 > 0:17:18There was a man who tipped reggae on its head by being the first

0:17:18 > 0:17:21White reggae artist to have a number one record in Jamaica,

0:17:21 > 0:17:23and changed the face of music for ever.

0:17:23 > 0:17:26That man was Judge Dread.

0:17:28 > 0:17:30# With her knickers all tattered and torn...

0:17:34 > 0:17:36# Uh-huh, uh-huh

0:17:36 > 0:17:38# Uh-huh, uh-huh

0:17:38 > 0:17:39# Ride up

0:17:39 > 0:17:40# Here we go

0:17:42 > 0:17:44# Tiki-taka, tiki-taka, tiki-taka

0:17:44 > 0:17:46# Up higher, pussy catch on fire

0:17:46 > 0:17:48# Yeah

0:17:50 > 0:17:52# Uh-huh, uh-huh

0:17:52 > 0:17:54# Uh-huh, uh-huh

0:17:54 > 0:17:56# Uh-huh, uh-huh

0:17:56 > 0:17:57# Yeah. #

0:17:59 > 0:18:01From the 1970s as rock became big business

0:18:01 > 0:18:03and bands became more intelligent,

0:18:03 > 0:18:07it gave birth to a new form of big bucks, no nonsense,

0:18:07 > 0:18:10abrasive managers like Don Arden and Peter Grant.

0:18:10 > 0:18:13After we saw the swindles perpetuated

0:18:13 > 0:18:15on the Stones, Beatles and Elvis,

0:18:15 > 0:18:17artists of my generation were determined to keep their mitts

0:18:17 > 0:18:21on the purse strings and retain creative control over the work.

0:18:21 > 0:18:23Rock was tired of being bullied

0:18:23 > 0:18:25and needed someone to fight their corner.

0:18:25 > 0:18:29The man who made all this possible for me was John Farrow.

0:18:29 > 0:18:31Eavis can fuck off.

0:18:33 > 0:18:36I don't care what stage he's on, what tent he's under, what field he's in.

0:18:36 > 0:18:38He's not coming. Tell them to fuck off.

0:18:38 > 0:18:41Well, look, I'm a lawyer. What the fuck do I know about music?

0:18:41 > 0:18:43I know about contracts. That's why they come to me.

0:18:43 > 0:18:45Tell Mendez to fuck off. It's busy.

0:18:45 > 0:18:48I mean managers back then were terrifying. Some were downright evil.

0:18:48 > 0:18:52Thotch at that time were being managed by Big Basil Steel.

0:18:52 > 0:18:55Big Basil Steel was a 6'3 ex-lion tamer.

0:18:55 > 0:18:58Basil also had a reputation for cornering artists in his office

0:18:58 > 0:19:00with a chair and a whip.

0:19:00 > 0:19:02So they asked me to get him out, which I did.

0:19:02 > 0:19:06I'm going to try and keep them. I'm a bit pushed for money.

0:19:06 > 0:19:08It's cost me my job.

0:19:08 > 0:19:11So if all the animal lovers, if they can put a few donations

0:19:11 > 0:19:14towards me and the lion, cos we're hungry.

0:19:17 > 0:19:20I am there to protect the interests of the artists and,

0:19:20 > 0:19:22very often, the artists from themselves.

0:19:22 > 0:19:24It is my job to say, "No," when they want to tour some ridiculous

0:19:24 > 0:19:28country where people can't afford yoghurt let alone concert tickets,

0:19:28 > 0:19:31or they want to put on some pretentious rock opera

0:19:31 > 0:19:33starring the cast of Sherlock or something.

0:19:33 > 0:19:36Get Gordon Ramsay on the phone. Tell him to fuck off, would you?

0:19:38 > 0:19:39Cos I don't like him.

0:19:41 > 0:19:44Right, Brian.

0:19:44 > 0:19:46Wouldn't you know Eavis has called about you doing Glastonbury?

0:19:46 > 0:19:49- It's all right, don't worry, I said no for you.- Well, what night?

0:19:49 > 0:19:52- Saturday, closing. - What stage?- Pyramid.

0:19:52 > 0:19:55Anyway, you don't want to be doing that, making a fool of yourself.

0:19:55 > 0:19:59You're 62, you'd look like an idiot. And...

0:19:59 > 0:20:01Yeah, you were asked to play a private concert

0:20:01 > 0:20:03for the Qatar Royal family. One night only.

0:20:03 > 0:20:09- You, Miley Cyrus, Beyonce, Gary Barlow and UB42.- Who's that?

0:20:09 > 0:20:14UB42. It's UB40 with Mark King from Level 42 on bass.

0:20:14 > 0:20:17- It was such an obscene amount of money I turned it down for you.- Why?

0:20:17 > 0:20:20You've got to think about your reputation.

0:20:20 > 0:20:21Yeah, but you managed Gary Barlow.

0:20:21 > 0:20:25Yeah, but he doesn't care about his reputation.

0:20:25 > 0:20:28Being the former frontman of a progressive rock band,

0:20:28 > 0:20:31you'd think I would despise the next generation of rockers

0:20:31 > 0:20:33who were determined to overthrow rock royalty.

0:20:33 > 0:20:36On the contrary, these guys were a breath of not so much fresh

0:20:36 > 0:20:41air bit feted air, with songs about abortion, anarchy and boredom.

0:20:41 > 0:20:43They were, of course, The Wurzels.

0:20:43 > 0:20:47# I am a cider drinker

0:20:47 > 0:20:49# I drinks it all of the day... #

0:20:52 > 0:20:54Then, of course, came the Sex Pistols,

0:20:54 > 0:20:56who would change the face of music for ever...

0:20:56 > 0:20:58Well, for a couple of years.

0:21:01 > 0:21:06The trousers changed. Hairstyles changed. The venues change.

0:21:06 > 0:21:07The promoters change.

0:21:07 > 0:21:10Everyone had this attitude - no respect for the music.

0:21:10 > 0:21:13- No respect for the... - What are you talking about?

0:21:13 > 0:21:14No respect for the guile of the mandolin.

0:21:14 > 0:21:19- No respect for the violin, the viola, the clarinet.- The woodwind.

0:21:22 > 0:21:27Punk came about because the music industry became too indulgent.

0:21:28 > 0:21:31You had producers, like me,

0:21:31 > 0:21:36who were making this kind of overblown crap, you know,

0:21:36 > 0:21:38that said nothing to the kids.

0:21:38 > 0:21:42Then someone would come along, like me,

0:21:42 > 0:21:44to really liven it up again.

0:21:48 > 0:21:52We went to see... In disguise, obviously, because we'd be mobbed.

0:21:52 > 0:21:57..the Sex Pistols in Middlesbrough, do you remember, in the Rock Garden?

0:21:57 > 0:21:59Couldn't play a fucking note.

0:22:01 > 0:22:02All my friends were punk rockers.

0:22:02 > 0:22:04I listened to the Sex Pistols on John Peel.

0:22:04 > 0:22:09I backcombed my hair, ripped up a T-shirt and all that kind of stuff.

0:22:09 > 0:22:15Then a mate of mine played me the second Thotch album - Onion Divorce.

0:22:15 > 0:22:16I was just hooked.

0:22:16 > 0:22:20That meant that from about 1977 to 1981,

0:22:20 > 0:22:22I was beaten up almost every day.

0:22:25 > 0:22:28Punk made it fashionable to be badly behaved.

0:22:28 > 0:22:30Before long, all rock stars were at it,

0:22:30 > 0:22:32even those old enough to know better.

0:22:34 > 0:22:37Back in the 1980s, I fronted a programme called Pop Quiz.

0:22:38 > 0:22:42It was frothy, it was fun, it was good natured.

0:22:42 > 0:22:43But, to be honest,

0:22:43 > 0:22:46behind the scenes it was a heck of a lot darker than that.

0:22:48 > 0:22:50Hello, welcome to a special Pop Quiz.

0:22:50 > 0:22:53On this one, the teams are skippered by Leo Sayer.

0:22:53 > 0:22:55CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

0:22:55 > 0:22:57Guitar hero from Status Quo, Rick Parfitt.

0:23:00 > 0:23:02It was a dodgy one, really, because we assumed, you know,

0:23:02 > 0:23:06two people, they'd get on, it'd be OK. It really wasn't...

0:23:06 > 0:23:08It was like a couple of heavyweights slugging it out.

0:23:08 > 0:23:10There was a real problem between them.

0:23:10 > 0:23:13We kick off with an individual round about this year's hits.

0:23:13 > 0:23:14Leo, let's see how you do.

0:23:14 > 0:23:17MUSIC: "Rocking All Over The World" by Status Quo

0:23:17 > 0:23:19BUZZER SOUNDS

0:23:27 > 0:23:28# Oh, here we are and here we are

0:23:28 > 0:23:30# And here we go

0:23:30 > 0:23:33# All aboard and we're hitting the road

0:23:33 > 0:23:35# Here we go

0:23:35 > 0:23:39# Rocking all over the world... #

0:23:39 > 0:23:41Was that The Monkeys?

0:23:41 > 0:23:43It wasn't.

0:23:43 > 0:23:45It wasn't The Monkeys. AUDIENCE GROANS

0:23:45 > 0:23:47It was Rick Parfitt.

0:23:47 > 0:23:48- No, really?- It was.

0:23:50 > 0:23:52It was a battle of the perms, really.

0:23:52 > 0:23:55It was, you know, curlers, tongs at dawn.

0:23:55 > 0:23:57Actually, I know him, cos he goes to my hairdresser.

0:24:00 > 0:24:03I don't know whether Leo was being extra dry or not,

0:24:03 > 0:24:05but Rick was absolutely livid.

0:24:05 > 0:24:08I'll let you off if you can impersonate him.

0:24:13 > 0:24:15CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

0:24:15 > 0:24:18That's it. That's all you have to do.

0:24:18 > 0:24:19Go on, go for it.

0:24:25 > 0:24:29Yeah, things actually took a turn for the worst during the recording break.

0:24:29 > 0:24:33Leo said something like, "You've got a fat nan."

0:24:33 > 0:24:34Cut to the end of the show.

0:24:34 > 0:24:37We're there in the green room, Parfitt, he's had a few.

0:24:37 > 0:24:39Quite clearly, he went crazy.

0:24:39 > 0:24:42Sayer, you bastard. No-one says I've got a fat nan.

0:24:44 > 0:24:47He was foaming at the mouth. He was like a rabid goat.

0:24:48 > 0:24:50I am the Parfitt.

0:24:50 > 0:24:53No-one says I've got a fat nan,

0:24:53 > 0:24:54you strange little man.

0:24:57 > 0:25:00So, my friends, this is how Rock was born -

0:25:00 > 0:25:03from jazz and blues to prog and punk.

0:25:03 > 0:25:05But as rock itself grew older,

0:25:05 > 0:25:08a midlife crisis was around the corner.

0:25:08 > 0:25:10Question was, would it survive?

0:25:10 > 0:25:15Find out next time on The Life Of Rock, with I, Brian Pern.

0:25:20 > 0:25:22- I haven't told him about the cameras.- What?- I haven't...

0:25:22 > 0:25:24- Here he is, here he is. - What's this for?

0:25:25 > 0:25:27Oh, it's a Making Of for the DVD.

0:25:28 > 0:25:31Nobody buys DVDs any more. Get out.

0:25:31 > 0:25:33It's also going to be on the red button.

0:25:33 > 0:25:35Nobody watches the red button stuff. Get out.

0:25:35 > 0:25:36It's also going to go on the iPlayer, so...

0:25:36 > 0:25:40It goes on the end of the actual episode or we don't do this thing.

0:25:40 > 0:25:42And we get final cut and approval.

0:25:42 > 0:25:45- I'll have to talk to someone about that.- No, you won't, no, you won't.

0:25:45 > 0:25:47- It's done or this is over. Brian?- Yes.- Do you agree?

0:25:47 > 0:25:49Well, I did give the guy 24/7 access.

0:25:49 > 0:25:52I think it's important for my fans to see how my brain works, you know?

0:25:52 > 0:25:54The life of an artist.

0:25:56 > 0:25:57Right. Christ.

0:25:59 > 0:26:02- What are you doing? - Just building a zoo.

0:26:02 > 0:26:04I just bought a hippo enclosure.

0:26:04 > 0:26:06- Oh, my daughter's got that game. - Oh, no, it's not a game.

0:26:06 > 0:26:09I really am building a zoo just outside Frankfurt.

0:26:09 > 0:26:12Thotch is still going on. We are Thotch.

0:26:12 > 0:26:14Well, we wanted to keep the name going.

0:26:15 > 0:26:20But Brian took us to court, and so we had to change the name to Thotch II.

0:26:22 > 0:26:28But Pat didn't like that, so we had to change the name to Thotch III.

0:26:30 > 0:26:32Then Tony didn't like Thotch III,

0:26:32 > 0:26:35so we had to change it to Thotch IV.

0:26:37 > 0:26:41Then John didn't like Thotch IV,

0:26:41 > 0:26:45so now we're Thotch 5.0.

0:26:45 > 0:26:46Which I quite like.

0:26:48 > 0:26:49Tangerine Dream.

0:26:49 > 0:26:53Yeah, when I was young, I dreamt the fucking tangerines,

0:26:53 > 0:26:55because you couldn't get them in fucking Belfast

0:26:55 > 0:26:56because there was a war on.

0:26:56 > 0:27:00All right? Give me all your fucking gatefold sleeve shite.

0:27:00 > 0:27:01I swear to sweet Jesus, man,

0:27:01 > 0:27:04my arm would not get tired punching that twat.

0:27:04 > 0:27:06Are you doing any Hootenannies?

0:27:06 > 0:27:08The Hootenanny? Yeah. We do that once a year.

0:27:08 > 0:27:10It's turned into the main show.

0:27:10 > 0:27:12The great thing for me and the orchestra

0:27:12 > 0:27:14is that we've had everybody....

0:27:14 > 0:27:16It's been such an honour in my career to have all

0:27:16 > 0:27:17the greatest stars, the greatest names.

0:27:17 > 0:27:20Everybody who is anybody has come an performed with us.

0:27:20 > 0:27:22We really have had absolutely everyone.

0:27:22 > 0:27:26I don't think there's anybody who's kind of a great star,

0:27:26 > 0:27:29that hasn't been with us. That's the great thing about it.

0:27:31 > 0:27:34- You haven't been on, have we? Have we ever asked you?- No.

0:27:34 > 0:27:36No. No. Well...

0:27:38 > 0:27:40Yeah.

0:27:40 > 0:27:41It's a bit loud.

0:27:41 > 0:27:43It's a bit loud.

0:27:43 > 0:27:45You want it loud, do you?

0:27:46 > 0:27:48Can you hear what I'm saying?

0:27:48 > 0:27:50It won't go any louder.

0:27:50 > 0:27:54You'll bust my eardrums. I don't want to end up like you.

0:27:54 > 0:27:55What? What?

0:27:55 > 0:27:57It's too loud.

0:27:57 > 0:27:58What?

0:27:58 > 0:28:00We're deep underground in a cave...

0:28:01 > 0:28:04- Sorry. Sorry.- This is ridiculous.

0:28:04 > 0:28:08Listen, we couldn't go to the actual place, but it looks fine on camera.

0:28:08 > 0:28:11Oh, come off it.

0:28:11 > 0:28:15# My love is a window And yours is a pane

0:28:15 > 0:28:19# My love is uncertain Yours is a drain

0:28:19 > 0:28:23# My love is a toaster Yours is a grill

0:28:23 > 0:28:27# My love is healthy While yours is ill

0:28:27 > 0:28:31# My love is a star buck Yours is a gut

0:28:31 > 0:28:35# I want a snack But your fridge door is shut

0:28:35 > 0:28:39# My love is modern Than yours is old

0:28:39 > 0:28:43# My love is hot And yours is cold. #