0:00:14 > 0:00:17- But no-one else is doing it! - There's a reason for that!
0:00:17 > 0:00:20Yes, it's such a good idea, no-one else has thought of it!
0:00:20 > 0:00:23No, it's such a bad idea, no-one else has thought of it.
0:00:23 > 0:00:26- I think it can be done tastefully. - It can't.
0:00:26 > 0:00:28- Eggy, tell him. - Yes, Eggy, tell him.
0:00:28 > 0:00:31- I have to say, Arthur, I'm with Michael on this one.- What?
0:00:31 > 0:00:34It's not the best idea you've ever had.
0:00:34 > 0:00:36A funeral photographer
0:00:36 > 0:00:39is not something people will want.
0:00:42 > 0:00:45Why not? It's a big get-together, isn't it?!
0:00:45 > 0:00:47All right, what will you ask everyone to say?
0:00:47 > 0:00:50- What do you mean?- You've got some mourners, dressed in black,
0:00:50 > 0:00:54standing in front of a hearse, posing for photographs.
0:00:54 > 0:00:55What do you ask them to say?
0:00:55 > 0:01:00You know, the usual. "Smile". Oh, wait!
0:01:00 > 0:01:02- There you go. - I see what you mean now.
0:01:02 > 0:01:04BEEPING What was that?
0:01:04 > 0:01:07My publishers said I should start a Twitter account.
0:01:07 > 0:01:08It's good for publicity, apparently.
0:01:08 > 0:01:11One of my tweets must have got retweeted.
0:01:11 > 0:01:13How many people see it when you tweet something?
0:01:13 > 0:01:16I don't think that's important, actually.
0:01:16 > 0:01:19It's good you do Twitter. The world can always use more opinions
0:01:19 > 0:01:22from middle class white people.
0:01:22 > 0:01:24That's sarcasm.
0:01:24 > 0:01:27What was I thinking about? Funeral photographer.
0:01:27 > 0:01:29It's a terrible idea.
0:01:29 > 0:01:33That's almost as bad as The Castle of Adventure.
0:01:33 > 0:01:37Oh, yes. The Castle of Adventure.
0:01:37 > 0:01:39- What was that? - An educational toy.
0:01:39 > 0:01:43I suppose the simplest way of putting it, Michael...
0:01:43 > 0:01:47HE STAMMERS
0:01:47 > 0:01:51An assault course for babies.
0:01:51 > 0:01:52I see.
0:01:52 > 0:01:55It didn't really work.
0:01:55 > 0:01:57I still think the principle is sound, Eggy.
0:01:57 > 0:02:00Giving babies some much-needed exercise,
0:02:00 > 0:02:02getting them thinking on their feet, et cetera.
0:02:02 > 0:02:05But relying on their sense of self-preservation to propel them
0:02:05 > 0:02:10through a really quite hazardous vertical maze...
0:02:10 > 0:02:15was, I now realise, flawed.
0:02:15 > 0:02:18Good God! You didn't actually build one, did you?
0:02:18 > 0:02:21We did, a prototype, we tested it with John.
0:02:24 > 0:02:29Where suddenly its shortcomings became hideously apparent.
0:02:29 > 0:02:31Thank goodness it never made it to market.
0:02:31 > 0:02:34But let's not dwell!
0:02:34 > 0:02:38Hey! You know Los Demonios de la Emocion?
0:02:38 > 0:02:41Oh, yes, at the Roundhouse. Yes, I've heard it's excellent.
0:02:41 > 0:02:44It's an Argentinian performance art group.
0:02:44 > 0:02:46"The Demons of Excitement".
0:02:46 > 0:02:49There's a lot of audience participation.
0:02:49 > 0:02:52At one point they descend on wires and grab people under the arms
0:02:52 > 0:02:55and propel them to the top of a suspended dome!
0:02:55 > 0:02:58Well, I got us some tickets for Saturday.
0:02:58 > 0:03:01Oh! I've been dying to see that!
0:03:01 > 0:03:05I know! Had to pull a few strings, but here we are.
0:03:06 > 0:03:08I don't want to go to that!
0:03:08 > 0:03:11- What? - I don't want to go to that!
0:03:11 > 0:03:13But you literally just said you wanted to see it.
0:03:13 > 0:03:16I didn't think we'd be able to get tickets! I don't want to be grabbed
0:03:16 > 0:03:20from the audience and taken to the top of a suspended dome!
0:03:20 > 0:03:25That sounds like the second phase of The Castle of Adventure.
0:03:29 > 0:03:32"No-one in the audience is safe."
0:03:32 > 0:03:34"Wear loose clothing."
0:03:34 > 0:03:38"Not recommended for pregnant women."
0:03:38 > 0:03:40I don't see why they get out of it.
0:03:40 > 0:03:43You go through this every time Sinem wants to do something different.
0:03:43 > 0:03:45If you're that worried about it,
0:03:45 > 0:03:47why don't you tell her you've got something else on?
0:03:47 > 0:03:51- I can't just lie.- Why not? - I'm not built like that.
0:03:51 > 0:03:54I actually have to have something to do and then I have to
0:03:54 > 0:03:58go and do that thing otherwise my face just radiates guilt.
0:03:58 > 0:04:00I look like a distress flare.
0:04:00 > 0:04:02Oh, well, just go, then. You might enjoy it!
0:04:02 > 0:04:05Don't be so ridiculous, Arthur.
0:04:05 > 0:04:09It's audience participation!
0:04:09 > 0:04:10Anything yet, you two?
0:04:10 > 0:04:13Sorry, Arthur, nothing's coming.
0:04:13 > 0:04:15BEEPING Oh! That noise!
0:04:15 > 0:04:19- Sorry.- Come on, you're my ideas people, and we need some fresh ones.
0:04:19 > 0:04:22If somebody can make money out of Michael's telephone
0:04:22 > 0:04:23making that terrible noise
0:04:23 > 0:04:26then surely we can come up with something.
0:04:26 > 0:04:29As you know, Michael, in the world of entertainment
0:04:29 > 0:04:32my legacy is established but I worry that not enough people know me
0:04:32 > 0:04:34as an entrepreneur.
0:04:34 > 0:04:37Barry Norman has his pickled onions,
0:04:37 > 0:04:40Bill Wyman has his range of metal detectors
0:04:40 > 0:04:44and Alan Sugar has, um, whatever he does.
0:04:44 > 0:04:47What do I have?
0:04:47 > 0:04:50I tell you what always gets the creative juices flowing, Arthur...
0:04:50 > 0:04:52- A soupover! - Good idea, John!
0:04:52 > 0:04:55Sorry, what did you say? A sleepover?
0:04:55 > 0:05:00- Isn't that for teenage girls? - No, no - soupover.
0:05:00 > 0:05:04- A soupover? - Yeah.
0:05:04 > 0:05:07- What is it? - Just what it sounds like.
0:05:07 > 0:05:09I don't know what it sounds like.
0:05:09 > 0:05:13We get together and just have a bit of a chat and some soup.
0:05:13 > 0:05:17- Soup?- Yes! You wouldn't not have soup at a soupover!
0:05:17 > 0:05:19I'm sorry, I'm still not quite sure I understand.
0:05:19 > 0:05:22- Look, we all go to someone's house, right?- Right.
0:05:22 > 0:05:26And everyone brings a small selection of their favourite soups.
0:05:26 > 0:05:28Right.
0:05:28 > 0:05:31And...that's it.
0:05:31 > 0:05:34- You each bring a small selection? - Yes.
0:05:34 > 0:05:38It's kind of like Come Dine With Me except with only soup.
0:05:38 > 0:05:41- How many of you are involved? - Just me, John and Eggy.
0:05:41 > 0:05:44So if you each bring a small selection of soups,
0:05:44 > 0:05:46- that's at least six different soups.- Oh, at least.
0:05:46 > 0:05:49Usually it'd be around nine separate soups.
0:05:49 > 0:05:53My sister's washing my pyjamas, so I can't do it today.
0:05:53 > 0:05:56Never mind, Eggy. It's more of a weekend thing, anyway.
0:05:56 > 0:06:01- Pyjamas?- Yes. We put on our pyjamas and watch Channel 4 Racing
0:06:01 > 0:06:06and do all the other things you would do at a soupover.
0:06:06 > 0:06:07So you do sleepover.
0:06:07 > 0:06:10This is just like an old man version of a sleepover.
0:06:10 > 0:06:13It's not overnight. We do it in the afternoon.
0:06:13 > 0:06:15Why do you wear your pyjamas, then?
0:06:15 > 0:06:19You can get very sleepy when you have soup during the day, Michael.
0:06:19 > 0:06:22Especially leek and potato.
0:06:22 > 0:06:24- Can I come? - No girls.
0:06:24 > 0:06:28- What? In this day and age? - You didn't let me finish.
0:06:28 > 0:06:32No girls have ever wanted to come to a soupover.
0:06:32 > 0:06:35You'd be very welcome, of course, Birdie.
0:06:35 > 0:06:39Actually, now I'm allowed to, I don't want to. I hate soup.
0:06:39 > 0:06:42- What? - I'm just not a fan.
0:06:44 > 0:06:46If you'll excuse me.
0:06:49 > 0:06:51What are you saying, Birdie?
0:06:51 > 0:06:54Have I upset Eggy? I just don't like soup.
0:06:54 > 0:06:56You've not been coming to the cafe long, Birdie,
0:06:56 > 0:06:58so I'll explain to Eggy.
0:06:58 > 0:07:01But don't be talking jive about soup!
0:07:01 > 0:07:03We take it all very seriously.
0:07:03 > 0:07:06- Why? - What?
0:07:06 > 0:07:08Why do you take soup seriously?
0:07:08 > 0:07:12During World War I, Eggy's Grandfather Charlie
0:07:12 > 0:07:14was a cook in the trenches.
0:07:14 > 0:07:17On Christmas Day, there was a huge 1,000-player football match
0:07:17 > 0:07:19between us and the Germans.
0:07:19 > 0:07:23Afterwards, Charlie had the idea of making
0:07:23 > 0:07:26a big load of soup for everyone.
0:07:26 > 0:07:32There wasn't a pot big enough, so he had to make it in a cannon.
0:07:32 > 0:07:35When it was ready, he lowered the cannon
0:07:35 > 0:07:38and everyone came and got soup from it.
0:07:38 > 0:07:41The Germans were a little bit nervous to see the cannon
0:07:41 > 0:07:45being pointed at them, but when they saw it was full of soup,
0:07:45 > 0:07:49they laughed and all was well.
0:07:53 > 0:07:56So, to commemorate this moment in our nation's history,
0:07:56 > 0:08:03you, Eggy and John eat up to nine separate soups in your pyjamas?
0:08:03 > 0:08:05It really is as simple as that.
0:08:05 > 0:08:08But it's not just one single incident.
0:08:08 > 0:08:11Soup has played a pivotal role throughout history.
0:08:11 > 0:08:14Archimedes, for example, was eating soup in the bath,
0:08:14 > 0:08:18when he had his "urethra" moment.
0:08:18 > 0:08:22And it's very much in that spirit that we formed our brotherhood.
0:08:22 > 0:08:25A brotherhood of soup, if you will.
0:08:25 > 0:08:29And you're doing it this weekend?
0:08:29 > 0:08:30Just hold that thought.
0:08:32 > 0:08:34Hi, hi, listen,
0:08:34 > 0:08:36I've just remembered.
0:08:36 > 0:08:38I'm not going to be able to make it this Saturday.
0:08:38 > 0:08:40Oh, no! Why not?
0:08:40 > 0:08:45I have a Cuban black bean and a Vietnamese noodle pho.
0:08:45 > 0:08:47Oooh! Intriguing!
0:08:47 > 0:08:50It's paying off already, John, getting some young blood in.
0:08:50 > 0:08:54Oh, yes, we usually only have British soups.
0:08:54 > 0:08:57- British soups?- Yes, you know, like cream of chicken,
0:08:57 > 0:08:59cream of tomato, cream of vegetable,
0:08:59 > 0:09:02cream of mushroom, cream of cauliflower, cream of turkey,
0:09:02 > 0:09:05and all the rest of the cream branch of the soup tree.
0:09:05 > 0:09:08And then of course you have your broths -
0:09:08 > 0:09:12Scotch broth, oxtail, mulligatawny, cock-a-leekie, mock turtle,
0:09:12 > 0:09:16real turtle. And then we move on to the cup-a-soups...
0:09:16 > 0:09:19- OK, I've got it, I've got it, thank you.- What did you bring, John?
0:09:19 > 0:09:21Cream of mushroom, leek and potato.
0:09:21 > 0:09:24Oh, that's two very heavy soups.
0:09:24 > 0:09:26You should always try to bring a consomme, John.
0:09:26 > 0:09:29It's a marathon, not a sprint.
0:09:29 > 0:09:32DOORBELL RINGS Oh, here's Eggy now.
0:09:32 > 0:09:34Do we just start eating them when Eggy arrives?
0:09:34 > 0:09:37- Oh, no. I've just had breakfast. - Right, I skipped breakfast
0:09:37 > 0:09:39because I thought we'd be eating soup all day.
0:09:39 > 0:09:42- Hello, everyone! - What have you got for us, Eggy?
0:09:42 > 0:09:46I've got cream of broccoli, seafood chowder and lentil soup.
0:09:46 > 0:09:49Again, very heavy soups. And three of them.
0:09:49 > 0:09:52I'm a bit worried about this. What's the vase for?
0:09:52 > 0:09:56I didn't have enough pots so I put the cream of broccoli in a vase.
0:09:56 > 0:10:01Ooh, I've never had soup from a vase before. That's quite exciting.
0:10:01 > 0:10:03It's different, isn't it?
0:10:03 > 0:10:06PHONE RINGS
0:10:06 > 0:10:09- Hi. - Hello.
0:10:09 > 0:10:12How ya doin', good lookin'?
0:10:12 > 0:10:14Are you really not coming to this with me?
0:10:14 > 0:10:18It's just I promised Arthur I'd do this thing with him.
0:10:18 > 0:10:21It's actually a pain in the butt, really.
0:10:21 > 0:10:23HE MOUTHS
0:10:23 > 0:10:26Just not sure what time it will finish.
0:10:26 > 0:10:27You kept going on about this show.
0:10:27 > 0:10:29Do you know the trouble it took to get tickets?
0:10:29 > 0:10:33Yeah, I know, I'm sorry. Sorry!
0:10:33 > 0:10:35You say that word so much, Michael.
0:10:35 > 0:10:37I could really do without hearing that word for a while.
0:10:37 > 0:10:39LINE DISCONNECTS
0:10:39 > 0:10:42Ooh, that didn't go brilliantly.
0:10:42 > 0:10:45Lady problems? Tell me about it!
0:10:45 > 0:10:48What do you know about lady problems?
0:10:48 > 0:10:52How to handle a woman? I know enough.
0:10:52 > 0:10:53I know a single Cadbury's Rose
0:10:53 > 0:10:56can bring a bigger smile than a whole box can.
0:10:56 > 0:10:59I know they like to be treated like a queen in the kitchen,
0:10:59 > 0:11:03a friend in the...bath,
0:11:03 > 0:11:06and a vixen in the scullery!
0:11:06 > 0:11:11But most importantly, love her. Merely love her.
0:11:11 > 0:11:13You've been alone - sorry, a bachelor -
0:11:13 > 0:11:16- the whole time I've known you. - Yes, well... Actually, Eggy,
0:11:16 > 0:11:18that's not a good place for the vase of soup.
0:11:18 > 0:11:24I'll put it over here next to this extremely tall pile of sliced bread.
0:11:24 > 0:11:26What was I saying? Oh, yes.
0:11:26 > 0:11:30I don't think I could live with someone else's eccentricities.
0:11:30 > 0:11:33- No women for us, eh, John? - Yeah!
0:11:43 > 0:11:45Shall we begin the festivities?
0:11:45 > 0:11:46Ooh, let's go!
0:11:46 > 0:11:49Are we really not having any soup now?
0:11:49 > 0:11:51- I've just had breakfast. - So have I.
0:11:51 > 0:11:53OK.
0:11:53 > 0:11:56Anyway, we always watch the racing first.
0:11:56 > 0:11:59- It's a VHS tape. - Yeah?
0:11:59 > 0:12:02So it's a recording of some horse racing.
0:12:02 > 0:12:04What's your point?
0:12:04 > 0:12:07Nothing, I just...
0:12:07 > 0:12:08OK.
0:12:10 > 0:12:15INDISTINCT COMMENTARY ON RACING
0:12:32 > 0:12:36Michael stood you up, did he? I couldn't help overhearing.
0:12:36 > 0:12:38Ha. Sorry, Birdie.
0:12:38 > 0:12:40Oh, no need to apologise to me.
0:12:40 > 0:12:44It's him who should be apologising. Getting up to no good the way he is.
0:12:44 > 0:12:46No, no, he said he's doing something important with Arthur.
0:12:46 > 0:12:50- He's not up to anything. - The soupover?
0:12:50 > 0:12:52Sorry, the what?
0:12:52 > 0:12:54They're supposedly having a soupover.
0:12:54 > 0:12:56What's a soupover?
0:12:56 > 0:13:00It's a celebration of soup. They each bring a different soup
0:13:00 > 0:13:02and sit around eating it in their pyjamas.
0:13:02 > 0:13:05- It sounds like the worst thing in the world.- Wait, wait, wait.
0:13:05 > 0:13:10You're saying he's not going to this extremely enjoyable event with me,
0:13:10 > 0:13:14- because he's at something called a "soupover"?- So he says.
0:13:14 > 0:13:17- What do you mean? - I don't believe it for a second.
0:13:17 > 0:13:19I do.
0:13:19 > 0:13:22Michael is exactly the right kind of boring for a soupover.
0:13:24 > 0:13:27- Look at that. - Beautiful.
0:13:27 > 0:13:29Lovely runner.
0:13:29 > 0:13:32Why can't I get any reception? I want to go on the internet.
0:13:32 > 0:13:34Why would you want to go on the internet?
0:13:34 > 0:13:37Whatever happened to conversation?
0:13:42 > 0:13:44- Look at that. - Beautiful.
0:13:44 > 0:13:46Lovely runner.
0:13:46 > 0:13:51I can't breathe. This is like living in the past.
0:13:51 > 0:13:54This race isn't even live.
0:13:54 > 0:13:55When are we having soup?
0:13:55 > 0:13:59Relax, Michael. A soupover has its own rhythm.
0:13:59 > 0:14:03You can't be rushing things. Abandon yourself to it.
0:14:05 > 0:14:08- Wait a second. Wait a second... - What?
0:14:08 > 0:14:11Is this the same race?
0:14:11 > 0:14:14- What do you mean? - This is the same race!
0:14:14 > 0:14:16This is the race that was just on!
0:14:16 > 0:14:18Again, what's your point?
0:14:18 > 0:14:20I thought it was at least different races!
0:14:20 > 0:14:25- How many races have we watched in the last hour?- Just the one.
0:14:25 > 0:14:30Have we been watching the same five minutes of television over and over?
0:14:30 > 0:14:31But it's a classic.
0:14:31 > 0:14:34Dear God! Oh...
0:14:34 > 0:14:36I need to sit down.
0:14:38 > 0:14:41- Look at that. - Beautiful.
0:14:42 > 0:14:44Lovely runner.
0:14:44 > 0:14:48MICHAEL GROANS
0:14:48 > 0:14:51I tell you what, something funny's going on.
0:14:51 > 0:14:54It's not the right weather for a soupover.
0:14:54 > 0:14:58They're up to no good. Doing men things.
0:14:58 > 0:15:00You're crazy. Men things?
0:15:00 > 0:15:03Ha! Michael is not a man!
0:15:03 > 0:15:06What do you mean "men things"?
0:15:06 > 0:15:10You know, the things men like doing, when men get together
0:15:10 > 0:15:12when there's no women there to keep an eye on them.
0:15:12 > 0:15:15What do you mean "men things"?
0:15:15 > 0:15:18The things of men and men's ways.
0:15:18 > 0:15:21Ceremonies. Things, goings on.
0:15:21 > 0:15:23What kind of things?
0:15:28 > 0:15:31LOUD SLURPING
0:15:33 > 0:15:36LOUD SLURPING
0:15:36 > 0:15:38- SATISFIED:- Ahhh!
0:15:38 > 0:15:41LOUD SLURPING
0:15:43 > 0:15:45LOUD SLURPING
0:15:51 > 0:15:53Well, brothers, I'm getting
0:15:53 > 0:15:57potatoes, leeks...
0:15:57 > 0:16:00It's potato and leek, Arthur.
0:16:00 > 0:16:03I haven't finished, Eggy.
0:16:03 > 0:16:05There's a harshness to the potatoes
0:16:05 > 0:16:08which indicates they were planted on the north side of the field,
0:16:08 > 0:16:12whereas the smooth finish of the leeks suggests Suffolk
0:16:12 > 0:16:14and its environs.
0:16:19 > 0:16:20Michael?
0:16:22 > 0:16:24It just tastes like soup.
0:16:24 > 0:16:27He has a way to go yet.
0:16:27 > 0:16:30Give him time. Give him time.
0:16:30 > 0:16:33This one might surprise you, Arthur.
0:16:42 > 0:16:45Mmmm!
0:16:45 > 0:16:49Would I be right in saying that these mushrooms come from Lidls?
0:17:06 > 0:17:08Disguises for cats.
0:17:09 > 0:17:11Why?
0:17:14 > 0:17:17Oh, well, let's not do that, then.
0:17:17 > 0:17:20Cats are already in a sort of disguise, aren't they?
0:17:20 > 0:17:25- How so, Eggy?- Well, a fake beard is a disguise, isn't it?
0:17:25 > 0:17:29And cats have sort of a body beard.
0:17:31 > 0:17:33Does that get anything going?
0:17:35 > 0:17:37Horseshoes!
0:17:37 > 0:17:38They already exist.
0:17:38 > 0:17:41No, I mean, proper ones that go over the horseshoes.
0:17:41 > 0:17:46So it sounds like two men instead of one horse.
0:17:46 > 0:17:51How and why and where would that be useful?
0:17:51 > 0:17:54In cases of subterfuge.
0:17:54 > 0:17:56If the enemy was looking for one man and a horse,
0:17:56 > 0:18:00it would hear the footsteps and think it was roughly three men.
0:18:00 > 0:18:05This might give the horse and man vital time to escape.
0:18:06 > 0:18:08From where?
0:18:09 > 0:18:10The war.
0:18:12 > 0:18:14- Ohhh! - Are you all right?
0:18:14 > 0:18:18Yeah, I just got that feeling of vertigo again.
0:18:18 > 0:18:20It's a very intense panic.
0:18:20 > 0:18:24A soupover can be quite overpowering if you're not ready for it, Michael.
0:18:24 > 0:18:27Put your legs between your head.
0:18:27 > 0:18:29Fish "fungers".
0:18:31 > 0:18:35- What's that, Arthur? - A more fun version of fish fingers.
0:18:35 > 0:18:39- Sounds like fish fungus. - Ooh, it does a bit, doesn't it?
0:18:39 > 0:18:40Maybe that's good.
0:18:40 > 0:18:43Kids like things that are a little bit horrible, don't they?
0:18:43 > 0:18:46Count Arthur Strong's Fish Fungers!
0:18:46 > 0:18:49I could dress as a fisherman on the packet.
0:18:49 > 0:18:53Or a doctor if we go the fungus route.
0:18:53 > 0:18:55I really don't feel well. I have to go outside.
0:18:55 > 0:19:00- I can't breathe! - Michael, look at me, look at me!
0:19:00 > 0:19:03This is a normal reaction to the soupover!
0:19:03 > 0:19:05What do you mean?
0:19:05 > 0:19:08Not everyone under the age of 60 can handle a soupover, Michael.
0:19:08 > 0:19:12Your body is probably going into shock.
0:19:12 > 0:19:16It's all so dull, so pointless!
0:19:16 > 0:19:19It's grim, it's just grim!
0:19:19 > 0:19:20Just push through it!
0:19:20 > 0:19:23Push through it and come out of the other side!
0:19:23 > 0:19:25I'm not sure I can!
0:19:25 > 0:19:27There's soup in a vase!
0:19:27 > 0:19:31There's soup...in a vase!
0:19:31 > 0:19:35I'm not like you, this isn't me!
0:19:35 > 0:19:36I've still got a chance!
0:19:36 > 0:19:39There's still hope!
0:19:39 > 0:19:42Well, I'll not stand in your way.
0:19:43 > 0:19:46What... What's happened?
0:19:46 > 0:19:50Oh, no! The extremely tall pile of sliced bread
0:19:50 > 0:19:53has toppled into the vase of soup,
0:19:53 > 0:19:57causing it to pour cream of broccoli all over your clothes.
0:19:57 > 0:20:00Don't worry, I'll put a wash on.
0:20:00 > 0:20:03- How long will that take? - Just a couple of hours.
0:20:03 > 0:20:06A couple of hours!
0:20:10 > 0:20:15Brother Arthur. I'm concerned about Michael.
0:20:15 > 0:20:18He grows pale and the light has gone from his eyes.
0:20:22 > 0:20:25He's just acclimatising to the rigorous mental demands
0:20:25 > 0:20:27of a soupover.
0:20:27 > 0:20:29We've all been there.
0:20:29 > 0:20:31The first time wasn't easy for any of us.
0:20:31 > 0:20:34True, true.
0:20:34 > 0:20:37His transformation is almost complete.
0:20:39 > 0:20:41It grows chill.
0:20:50 > 0:20:54- Brothers, there's a problem. - A problem, you say?
0:20:54 > 0:20:58There's still too much soup. The sink's full and so's the bin.
0:20:58 > 0:21:00I was afraid of that.
0:21:00 > 0:21:03While you've been a delightful addition to the soupover,
0:21:03 > 0:21:06Michael, your presence has caused us something of a problem.
0:21:06 > 0:21:10Soup disposal is difficult at the best of times,
0:21:10 > 0:21:12but with four participants
0:21:12 > 0:21:16there's a real danger of a sort of soup mountain forming.
0:21:16 > 0:21:19What are we going to do?
0:21:29 > 0:21:31TOILET FLUSHES
0:21:35 > 0:21:37Flush it again, Brother John.
0:21:39 > 0:21:41TOILET FLUSHES
0:21:44 > 0:21:48- I'm probably losing loads of money, you know.- What do you mean?
0:21:48 > 0:21:50Water charges. All this flushing.
0:21:52 > 0:21:54If there was something in the cistern
0:21:54 > 0:21:57you wouldn't need as much water.
0:21:57 > 0:21:59Hang on a second. Say that again.
0:21:59 > 0:22:02Water displacement. If there was something in the cistern,
0:22:02 > 0:22:06it'd use less water and you'd save money on water charges.
0:22:06 > 0:22:09You might just have something there, Michael!
0:22:09 > 0:22:12Wait a second, let me run the numbers.
0:22:12 > 0:22:14They check out!
0:22:14 > 0:22:17The average household could save up to £25 a year!
0:22:17 > 0:22:20OK, OK, we've got something here. Something's cooking.
0:22:20 > 0:22:23Questions - what kind of object should it be?
0:22:23 > 0:22:24What should it be made of?
0:22:24 > 0:22:29- My head is spinning. This is a brilliant idea.- Settle in, boys.
0:22:29 > 0:22:33The soup may be down the toilet, but this soupover is far from over.
0:22:33 > 0:22:34Isn't that right, Michael?
0:22:34 > 0:22:35HE GROANS
0:22:35 > 0:22:38Ha-ha! Good old Michael!
0:22:39 > 0:22:43- Names, names. Toilet Pal. Toilet Friend.- Toilet Mate.- Toilet Mate.
0:22:45 > 0:22:50INDISTINCT CHATTER THROUGHOUT SCENE
0:23:03 > 0:23:07..save at least £3,000 a year using this product.
0:23:07 > 0:23:10What? Wait a minute, what did you say?
0:23:10 > 0:23:14Any business employing over 1,000 people will save at least
0:23:14 > 0:23:17£3,000 a year using this product.
0:23:17 > 0:23:20But...that's quite good.
0:23:20 > 0:23:23- Too right it is! - What's that?
0:23:23 > 0:23:24It's the Toilet Brick.
0:23:24 > 0:23:26That's just a prototype.
0:23:26 > 0:23:30The actual brick will be made of galvanised rubber.
0:23:30 > 0:23:32This might be a good idea.
0:23:32 > 0:23:36You might actually have come up with a good idea.
0:23:36 > 0:23:39John, explain this to me.
0:23:39 > 0:23:42Let me take through the key principals of the design...
0:23:42 > 0:23:45The soupover is working its magic.
0:23:45 > 0:23:49Michael is becoming one of us.
0:23:49 > 0:23:52So he is truly The One.
0:23:52 > 0:23:54But is he ready?
0:23:54 > 0:23:59- He's still a young man.- His youth is the key to the soupover's future.
0:23:59 > 0:24:02Through Michael we can access the internet,
0:24:02 > 0:24:06and soon every home will have a Toilet Brick.
0:24:06 > 0:24:09We're going to be fairly well off.
0:24:09 > 0:24:11Fairly well off I tell you!
0:24:11 > 0:24:12HE LAUGHS EVILLY
0:24:12 > 0:24:17DOORBELL RINGS Who can that be?
0:24:17 > 0:24:20I think the biggest issue will be marketing, John.
0:24:20 > 0:24:22If we can really put the Toilet Brick into every...
0:24:22 > 0:24:25Hi, Sinem.
0:24:25 > 0:24:28Oh. It really is a soupover.
0:24:28 > 0:24:31- Well, yes, what did you think? - I...
0:24:31 > 0:24:33don't know.
0:24:33 > 0:24:36They've come up with a pretty good idea, Sinem - the Toilet Brick.
0:24:36 > 0:24:40It can save you money and it's good for the environment.
0:24:40 > 0:24:43Right. I just thought you might have finished.
0:24:43 > 0:24:45Thought you might still like to come.
0:24:45 > 0:24:49Leave him, Sinem. He's happy here.
0:24:49 > 0:24:53What's the delay? If you want a lift, let's get a move on.
0:24:53 > 0:24:55I think Michael's staying.
0:24:55 > 0:24:58Actually, what's that smell? Something smells good.
0:24:59 > 0:25:03You know what, Michael, if this is the kind of life you really want,
0:25:03 > 0:25:06then you should just say so. But this...
0:25:06 > 0:25:09This isn't what I want. Goodbye, Michael.
0:25:09 > 0:25:13- But it is actually a good idea. The Toilet Brick...- Toilet Brick?
0:25:13 > 0:25:15What the hell is a Toilet Brick?
0:25:15 > 0:25:18It's a water displacement device you put in a cistern.
0:25:18 > 0:25:21- I think it can work.- Of course it works. We have one in the cafe.
0:25:21 > 0:25:23It's called a Toilet Hippo.
0:25:23 > 0:25:25- What?! - What?!
0:25:25 > 0:25:28Yeah, you can get them online.
0:25:28 > 0:25:32- Sinem? - Yes?
0:25:32 > 0:25:34Let's get the hell out of here!
0:25:34 > 0:25:38- Aren't you going to change? - Loose clothing. Let's go! Go!
0:25:40 > 0:25:43- So he wasn't The One. - No.
0:25:46 > 0:25:48But there is another.
0:25:53 > 0:25:56Then they sprayed foam all over the audience
0:25:56 > 0:25:59and put this really loud dance music on.
0:25:59 > 0:26:01It was actually quite fun.
0:26:01 > 0:26:04And did they grab you and take you to the top of the suspended dome?
0:26:04 > 0:26:07No. Next time.
0:26:07 > 0:26:10I think I'm going to try and be more open to those kind of things.
0:26:10 > 0:26:14I'm not really ready for pyjamas and soup in the daytime.
0:26:14 > 0:26:17No hurry. That's all ahead of you.
0:26:20 > 0:26:22Can I have a spoon, please, Bulent?
0:26:24 > 0:26:26Aaargh!
0:26:26 > 0:26:28You up to much at the weekend?