0:00:02 > 0:00:07# Who do you think you are kidding, Mr Hitler
0:00:07 > 0:00:11# If you think we're on the run?
0:00:11 > 0:00:16# We are the boys who will stop your little game
0:00:17 > 0:00:22# We are the boys who will make you think again
0:00:22 > 0:00:27# Cos who do you think you are kidding, Mr Hitler
0:00:27 > 0:00:31# If you think old England's done?
0:00:31 > 0:00:37# Mr Brown goes off to town on the 8:21
0:00:37 > 0:00:41# But he comes home each evening and he's ready with his gun
0:00:41 > 0:00:46# So who do you think you are kidding, Mr Hitler
0:00:46 > 0:00:51# If you think old England's done? #
0:00:52 > 0:00:58Right, men. This is top secret. Put the blackouts up.
0:00:58 > 0:01:00Woods, Meadows,
0:01:00 > 0:01:05stand guard outside the main door there and don't let anybody in.
0:01:05 > 0:01:07I don't care who it is, right?
0:01:13 > 0:01:17- All clear out there, Hancock? - All clear, sir.- Good.
0:01:22 > 0:01:25Right, Jones. All clear.
0:01:25 > 0:01:26Right, sir. Come on, lads.
0:01:26 > 0:01:28BELLS JANGLE
0:01:38 > 0:01:42Excellent, men. Very good turnout.
0:01:42 > 0:01:45Sir, aren't you going to wear your attire?
0:01:45 > 0:01:49No, not for just now. I shall just wear the hat.
0:01:49 > 0:01:52Now, the reason I have taken
0:01:52 > 0:01:57all these pains to keep this matter a secret
0:01:57 > 0:02:02is because nobody must see this dance until it is perfect.
0:02:02 > 0:02:06Otherwise, we might look like a bunch of idiots.
0:02:08 > 0:02:12Captain Mainwaring, I want a word wi' ye.
0:02:12 > 0:02:16I've got to tell you, sir, that as a Scot,
0:02:16 > 0:02:23I feel a right Jessie dressed up in this pansy Sassenach get-up!
0:02:23 > 0:02:26It's frightfully difficult getting about like this.
0:02:32 > 0:02:35It really is most awkward.
0:02:35 > 0:02:37- You'll soon get used to it.- Will I?
0:02:37 > 0:02:42Mr Wilson isn't as other men. His legs point in the wrong direction.
0:02:44 > 0:02:46What's the matter with them?
0:02:46 > 0:02:50- Do try and sort yourself out. - Well, I haven't done it before.
0:02:51 > 0:02:56- Thank you so much.- There you are.
0:02:56 > 0:03:00- Now, as you can see...- Sorry, sir.
0:03:00 > 0:03:05As you know, we're only £2,000 off our target...
0:03:05 > 0:03:06which is to buy a Spitfire.
0:03:06 > 0:03:09And during this week, during the coming week,
0:03:09 > 0:03:15the people of Walmington will be doing their utmost to raise this.
0:03:15 > 0:03:20The climax is the procession on Saturday, when we'll do our dance.
0:03:20 > 0:03:23Sergeant Wilson will collect money.
0:03:23 > 0:03:27I don't like the idea of asking strangers for money.
0:03:27 > 0:03:33It's perfectly simple. Gallop the horse. Make it look lifelike.
0:03:33 > 0:03:37That's right. And you make jocular remarks.
0:03:37 > 0:03:38I see.
0:03:40 > 0:03:42What sort of jocular remarks?
0:03:42 > 0:03:48Try...um..."Har, har, har. Give till it hurts, har, har, har." Try that.
0:03:48 > 0:03:52- IN A FLAT VOICE: - Ha, ha, ha. Give till it hurts.
0:03:55 > 0:04:00If we want to collect £2,000, he'll have to be more jocular than that!
0:04:00 > 0:04:04He could say, "We need Spitfires to beat the Hun -
0:04:04 > 0:04:07"put money in my mouth and it goes to my tum."
0:04:07 > 0:04:12Rubbish! All he's got to do is wave his stick and say,
0:04:12 > 0:04:15"Give us your money or I'll bash your head in!"
0:04:15 > 0:04:17All right, now let's form up.
0:04:17 > 0:04:22Private Sponge, give the instruction book to Sergeant Wilson.
0:04:26 > 0:04:29Now, where did we get to last time?
0:04:29 > 0:04:31I was having trouble whiffling, sir.
0:04:31 > 0:04:37Ah, whiffling. It's important that you understand this.
0:04:37 > 0:04:39Read that bit out, Wilson.
0:04:39 > 0:04:43Just a minute, sir. Here we are. Whiffling.
0:04:43 > 0:04:49"The movement of the whiffling stick is to frighten away evil spirits."
0:04:49 > 0:04:56- Away from what, Mr Mainwaring? - This is a fertility dance, Pike.
0:04:56 > 0:04:59I don't think my sister Dolly would approve.
0:04:59 > 0:05:01Ah, you silly old duffer.
0:05:01 > 0:05:06It's to encourage the crops to grow.
0:05:06 > 0:05:10It's danced every year by the young, fertile men of the village.
0:05:10 > 0:05:12It's not much good us doing it!
0:05:14 > 0:05:17You speak for yourself!
0:05:17 > 0:05:18All right, that'll do.
0:05:18 > 0:05:20Permission to speak, sir.
0:05:20 > 0:05:27- I do not wish to stand opposite Frazer when he's whiffling.- Why not?
0:05:27 > 0:05:31I've faced Whirling Dervishes and I've faced charging Fuzzy Wuzzies,
0:05:31 > 0:05:37but I don't want to face him. He's got a mad look in his eye.
0:05:37 > 0:05:39Mad? Mad!
0:05:39 > 0:05:41My eyes are perfectly sane!
0:05:41 > 0:05:46Captain Mainwaring, would you say I had mad eyes?
0:05:46 > 0:05:49Well...no...not really mad.
0:05:49 > 0:05:52There!
0:05:52 > 0:05:56Just before we start, we'd better check that the bells are all right.
0:05:56 > 0:05:59Right, left leg first.
0:05:59 > 0:06:01Right leg.
0:06:03 > 0:06:06Is that the best you can do?
0:06:06 > 0:06:08A touch of rheumatism, I'm afraid.
0:06:08 > 0:06:14- So sorry, sir. I beg your pardon. - DO try and control that animal!
0:06:14 > 0:06:17He's not used to this type of work.
0:06:18 > 0:06:21Right. From the top. Private Day.
0:06:21 > 0:06:28- CONCERTINA PLAYS - One, two, three, four, five, six...
0:06:28 > 0:06:30Back!
0:06:30 > 0:06:32Forward!
0:06:32 > 0:06:33Round!
0:06:37 > 0:06:39Turn!
0:06:41 > 0:06:42Whiffling!
0:06:46 > 0:06:49- Beansprout!- WHOOH!
0:06:49 > 0:06:50WHOOH!
0:06:50 > 0:06:53WHOOH!
0:06:53 > 0:06:55WHOOH!
0:06:56 > 0:06:59Watch what you're doing!
0:07:01 > 0:07:04APPLAUSE
0:07:09 > 0:07:11That was very good indeed.
0:07:11 > 0:07:15Right, take a break and change into your uniforms.
0:07:15 > 0:07:19JONES MOUTHS SILENTLY
0:07:19 > 0:07:22Jones. Jones. Jones!
0:07:22 > 0:07:28What's all this nonsense about Frazer hitting you with his stick?
0:07:28 > 0:07:30That's not like you.
0:07:30 > 0:07:35I know it isn't. I can't hide it, I'm in a highly nervous state.
0:07:35 > 0:07:39- Have you got trouble at home? - No, it's trouble away from home.
0:07:39 > 0:07:43- You'd better come in the office. - Thank you, sir.
0:07:43 > 0:07:50- Could Mr Wilson come too, sir?- Why? - He's a man of the world.- Very well.
0:07:50 > 0:07:53- Wilson?- Yes, sir?- Office.
0:07:53 > 0:07:55Do you want me to walk or gallop?
0:07:55 > 0:07:57Just come in the office, will you!
0:08:08 > 0:08:11That's very kind of you.
0:08:11 > 0:08:13Now, Jones...
0:08:14 > 0:08:17Get this thing off my desk!
0:08:17 > 0:08:21I'm terribly sorry, sir. It sort of sticks out.
0:08:21 > 0:08:23Jones?
0:08:23 > 0:08:27- It's rather delicate. It's Mrs Fox. - Mrs Fox?
0:08:27 > 0:08:32Yes. She's a widow lady, and we have an arrangement.
0:08:32 > 0:08:35We've been walking out.
0:08:35 > 0:08:36Walking where?
0:08:36 > 0:08:38Well, all over the place.
0:08:38 > 0:08:43I go round to her place with a couple of chops,
0:08:43 > 0:08:46she cooks, and we eat them together.
0:08:46 > 0:08:51There's nothing between Mrs Fox and me. It's purely Teutonic.
0:08:52 > 0:08:58I go round on a Saturday night, we listen to In Town Tonight,
0:08:58 > 0:09:02and when the announcer says, "Carry on, London," I go home.
0:09:04 > 0:09:07I don't see what this has got to do with me.
0:09:07 > 0:09:12- Recently, you see, her affection has been taken by another.- Who?
0:09:12 > 0:09:15Mr Gordon, the Town Clerk.
0:09:15 > 0:09:18What? Not that silly, bald-headed old duffer?
0:09:22 > 0:09:25I don't mean he's a bald-headed old duffer
0:09:25 > 0:09:26just because he's got a bald head!
0:09:26 > 0:09:28He'd be a silly duffer WITH hair.
0:09:32 > 0:09:35- A full head of hair... - Yes, all right, all right.
0:09:37 > 0:09:44- Everybody knows he's a roue and a philanthropist!- What can I do?
0:09:45 > 0:09:47I want you to speak to her, sir.
0:09:47 > 0:09:49I couldn't possibly do that.
0:09:49 > 0:09:53Yes, you must. You must. Here's her telephone number.
0:09:53 > 0:09:58- Don't go spreading it around, mind. - But I...
0:09:58 > 0:10:01You must, otherwise I shall be a broken man,
0:10:01 > 0:10:05and what good is a broken Lance Corporal?
0:10:05 > 0:10:10- Oh, dear. What are you going to do? - I don't know.
0:10:10 > 0:10:12I suppose I could ring her up.
0:10:12 > 0:10:17Perhaps I ought to point out to her what sort of a chap this Clerk is.
0:10:17 > 0:10:21I'll give her a ring later and arrange to see her.
0:10:28 > 0:10:30Godfrey? Is that you, son?
0:10:30 > 0:10:33Yes, I was just having my hot milk.
0:10:33 > 0:10:37It has happened. I knew it would one day.
0:10:37 > 0:10:39What?
0:10:39 > 0:10:44It's Mainwaring. He's succumbed to the lure of the flesh.
0:10:44 > 0:10:49Did you hear what I said? The flesh. The flesh!
0:10:49 > 0:10:54I wish you wouldn't keep repeating that word. My sister Dolly may hear.
0:10:54 > 0:10:57Besides, I don't believe a word.
0:10:57 > 0:11:00I tell you, I heard it with my own ears.
0:11:00 > 0:11:06I happened to be passing the office and I heard him speaking to a woman.
0:11:06 > 0:11:08Who?
0:11:08 > 0:11:13Mrs Fox, that fine big widow woman!
0:11:14 > 0:11:18But Mr Mainwaring is a pillar of respectability.
0:11:18 > 0:11:20Men like him are the worst!
0:11:20 > 0:11:23Looking down their noses at other folk,
0:11:23 > 0:11:29and all the time deep inside, lust, lust, sheer naked lust!
0:11:29 > 0:11:32I tell you, the fires of hell
0:11:32 > 0:11:37are lying in wait for him! He's doomed, DOOMED!
0:11:37 > 0:11:39It's nonsense.
0:11:39 > 0:11:41Nonsense?!
0:11:41 > 0:11:46Listen, I heard him arrange to meet this woman at the Marigold Tea Rooms
0:11:46 > 0:11:48tomorrow morning at 10:30.
0:11:48 > 0:11:51Why don't you go and see yourself?
0:11:51 > 0:11:54I will, to prove that you're wrong!
0:11:54 > 0:11:57Right, I'll meet you there.
0:11:57 > 0:12:01And don't forget it's your turn to pay for the coffee.
0:12:04 > 0:12:10Hello, hello? Pikey, I must speak to you, boy. It's very important.
0:12:10 > 0:12:16I want to know what time Captain Mainwaring has his morning coffee.
0:12:16 > 0:12:2110:30 every morning at the Marigold Tea Rooms. Why?
0:12:21 > 0:12:26My information is that he's meeting a certain lady there.
0:12:26 > 0:12:31Mr Mainwaring doesn't know "certain ladies". He's married.
0:12:31 > 0:12:36Well, she's not so much a lady as kind of a...big...
0:12:36 > 0:12:39..oooh...ah ha...
0:12:39 > 0:12:43I write this gossip column for the Eastbourne Gazette
0:12:43 > 0:12:46called Whispers from Walmington.
0:12:46 > 0:12:49I can see the headlines now.
0:12:49 > 0:12:54A local bank manager's name linked with a certain widow.
0:12:54 > 0:12:57No, you must have it all wrong.
0:12:57 > 0:13:02My information is that he's besotted with her, boy, besotted!
0:13:02 > 0:13:05What, like in that film "Rain?"
0:13:05 > 0:13:08There was this clergyman, you see,
0:13:08 > 0:13:11and he was besotted with a girl named Sadie Thompson.
0:13:11 > 0:13:15Being a clergyman, he wasn't allowed to be besotted.
0:13:15 > 0:13:19In the end, he walked into the sea.
0:13:19 > 0:13:22You don't think that Mr Mainwaring will walk into the sea?
0:13:22 > 0:13:25He'll have a long walk, the tide's out tomorrow morning.
0:13:29 > 0:13:34Captain Mainwaring is a perfectly respectable married man.
0:13:34 > 0:13:37You know your trouble, Godfrey?
0:13:37 > 0:13:42You live in a dream world of your own. I tell you...
0:13:47 > 0:13:50I'd hoped the place would be empty.
0:13:50 > 0:13:54Don't worry, sir. Nobody will know why you're meeting Mrs Fox.
0:13:56 > 0:13:59It doesn't do for a man in my position to be seen in public
0:13:59 > 0:14:02with a flashy woman like Mrs Fox.
0:14:02 > 0:14:06In a small town like this, tongues wag, tongues wag.
0:14:06 > 0:14:10Nobody will pay any attention.
0:14:15 > 0:14:18Now, where shall we sit?
0:14:18 > 0:14:21- I'm going to sit over here.- I see.
0:14:21 > 0:14:25You go and sit on your own.
0:14:29 > 0:14:32- Psst. Mr Mainwaring.- Good morning.
0:14:36 > 0:14:39- Jones?- Don't give me away, sir.
0:14:39 > 0:14:43- Why are you dressed like that? - I'm heavily disguised.
0:14:44 > 0:14:48Yoo-hoo! Mr Mainwaring!
0:14:48 > 0:14:53Morning, Mr Frazer, Mr Godfrey.
0:14:53 > 0:14:55Hello, Mr Wilson.
0:14:55 > 0:14:58- I'm ever so sorry I'm late.- Please...
0:14:58 > 0:15:02- I'm not usually late when I meet a gentleman friend, but...- Sit down.
0:15:02 > 0:15:06- Please sit down!- Thank you.
0:15:06 > 0:15:09See that, Godfrey. The way he manhandled her!
0:15:22 > 0:15:25Well, this is cosy.
0:15:25 > 0:15:28- Good morning.- Two coffees, please.
0:15:28 > 0:15:30No coffee with Mr Wilson today?
0:15:30 > 0:15:35No. I'm...I'm having this lady with my coffee... I mean...er...
0:15:35 > 0:15:38I see(!)
0:15:40 > 0:15:43The reason I asked you to meet me
0:15:43 > 0:15:45is to...
0:15:47 > 0:15:53- What do you want, Pike?- Excuse me, but Mrs Mainwaring's on the phone.
0:15:53 > 0:15:58Oh. Right. Tell her I'll ring back later, will you?
0:15:58 > 0:16:02Ring back later, right.
0:16:02 > 0:16:05What is it now?
0:16:10 > 0:16:15- Good morning, Mrs Fox. - Hello, dear.- It's nice to see you.
0:16:15 > 0:16:16Get out, Pike.
0:16:18 > 0:16:21Bye-bye, dear.
0:16:23 > 0:16:29Mrs Fox, the reason I asked you to meet me here
0:16:29 > 0:16:31was to discuss a rather delicate matter.
0:16:31 > 0:16:37- Yes?- I find these affairs of the emotions very embarrassing.
0:16:37 > 0:16:41You don't need to be shy with me.
0:16:41 > 0:16:47The point is, Mrs Fox, you're a very attractive woman.
0:16:47 > 0:16:49- And I...- Two coffees.
0:16:56 > 0:16:58What was I saying?
0:16:58 > 0:17:01You were saying how attractive I was.
0:17:01 > 0:17:07Oh, yes...which indeed you are. Particularly to older men.
0:17:07 > 0:17:09You're very attractive, too.
0:17:09 > 0:17:14- That's got nothing to do with it. - But you are. You ARE.
0:17:14 > 0:17:17Yes, well, we won't argue about it.
0:17:20 > 0:17:23The point is, Mrs Fox,
0:17:23 > 0:17:28you have had Mr Jones as an admirer for some time now,
0:17:28 > 0:17:32and now you have another.
0:17:34 > 0:17:37Mr Mainwaring!
0:17:37 > 0:17:39Oh!
0:17:39 > 0:17:42See! See there, Godfrey.
0:17:42 > 0:17:46For goodness' sake, they're playing handy-pandy!
0:17:46 > 0:17:47I think we'd better go.
0:17:47 > 0:17:49No, man.
0:17:51 > 0:17:58Being a public figure, I expect this admirer is of great attraction.
0:17:58 > 0:18:01Oh, he is. He IS.
0:18:01 > 0:18:03Yes.
0:18:03 > 0:18:08Whereas Jones is just a simple butcher.
0:18:08 > 0:18:10But he's a fine figure of a man,
0:18:10 > 0:18:15Mrs Fox, a full head of fine, distinguished grey hair.
0:18:15 > 0:18:21While your new admirer, not to put too fine a point on it, is bald.
0:18:21 > 0:18:26Mr Mainwaring, you know what they say about bald-headed men?
0:18:26 > 0:18:30No, what do they say?
0:18:30 > 0:18:34- Well...- The thing is, Mrs Fox,
0:18:34 > 0:18:39Jones is a loyal member of my platoon, and I don't want him hurt.
0:18:39 > 0:18:43- We won't hurt him, Mr Mainwaring. - WE?
0:18:43 > 0:18:46He can have Mondays and Saturdays
0:18:46 > 0:18:49and you can have Tuesdays and Fridays.
0:18:50 > 0:18:54I'm talking about Mr Gordon, the Town Clerk!
0:18:54 > 0:18:56He can have Wednesdays.
0:19:02 > 0:19:07- What do you want now, Pike?- Sorry, but Mrs Mainwaring's on the phone.
0:19:07 > 0:19:11I said you were having coffee with Mrs Fox, but she still wants you.
0:19:18 > 0:19:20You stupid boy.
0:19:27 > 0:19:29I tell you, I've never been so shocked in my life.
0:19:29 > 0:19:36That woman, that frightful woman, really thought I had amorous ideas.
0:19:36 > 0:19:38How awfully embarrassing for you.
0:19:38 > 0:19:40And when my wife rang up,
0:19:40 > 0:19:44that stupid boy Pike told her I was having coffee with Mrs Fox.
0:19:44 > 0:19:46All hell broke loose.
0:19:46 > 0:19:52Elizabeth wouldn't listen. Look what she did to my tie.
0:20:01 > 0:20:04She rang the bank twelve times today.
0:20:04 > 0:20:08- If she rings tonight, tell her I'm not here.- All right.
0:20:12 > 0:20:15- Good evening.- Evening, Jonesy.
0:20:15 > 0:20:18Thank you for talking to Mrs Fox.
0:20:18 > 0:20:21- I'm sure it had an effect. - It certainly had.
0:20:22 > 0:20:27Captain Mainwaring, we can't get into the hall,
0:20:27 > 0:20:28the door's locked.
0:20:28 > 0:20:31Mr Hodges told us to go away.
0:20:31 > 0:20:37Right, you can come out now. Line up.
0:20:37 > 0:20:39That's it. There we are. Very nice.
0:20:40 > 0:20:42That's it. There we are then.
0:20:44 > 0:20:48What do you think, Mr Town Clerk?
0:20:48 > 0:20:51Oh, they're very nice, they are.
0:20:51 > 0:20:54We've got to choose one of you
0:20:54 > 0:20:57to play Lady Godiva in the procession.
0:20:57 > 0:21:02- Can we see the first one? - Certainly. On the horse, dear.
0:21:02 > 0:21:05Jones, I want you to show the men
0:21:05 > 0:21:11how to strip down the Lewis gun in two minutes. I shall time you.
0:21:14 > 0:21:19- Uncle Arthur.- What is it? - The hall is full of naked ladies.
0:21:21 > 0:21:24Don't be silly, Frank. Pay attention to the lecture.
0:21:24 > 0:21:27- It is! Come and have a look yourself. - Good Lord. What next?
0:21:30 > 0:21:32Good heavens!
0:21:32 > 0:21:36Shall we tell Mr Mainwaring? PHONE RINGS
0:21:36 > 0:21:39- Answer the phone, Wilson. - Yes, of course.
0:21:39 > 0:21:46- Hurry, you've only got 30 seconds. - Hello, yes. Just hold on a minute.
0:21:46 > 0:21:49It's Mrs Mainwaring, sir.
0:21:49 > 0:21:52I'm out.
0:21:52 > 0:21:58- I'm sorry, I'm afraid he's gone out. - Yoo-hoo! Mr Mainwaring, I'm here!
0:22:00 > 0:22:04How dare you burst in on one of my lectures.
0:22:04 > 0:22:08I'm sorry. I was just on my way to the hall.
0:22:08 > 0:22:11Excuse me, boys.
0:22:11 > 0:22:14Mr Gordon! Let me in.
0:22:14 > 0:22:16It's only little me.
0:22:16 > 0:22:21Good evening, my dear, come in.
0:22:21 > 0:22:26Mr Mainwaring, stop him, stop him! What's he doing in there?
0:22:26 > 0:22:29- Mr Mainwaring...?- I don't know, Jones, but I intend to find out.
0:22:35 > 0:22:40- What's the meaning of this? - Buzz off, Napoleon.
0:22:40 > 0:22:42I'm appalled, Vicar.
0:22:42 > 0:22:45Wilson. Wilson! Don't stare at the girls.
0:22:45 > 0:22:47- Get them covered.- What with?
0:22:47 > 0:22:51Come away.
0:22:51 > 0:22:53All this fuss over a few silly girls!
0:22:53 > 0:22:57If the vicar wants girls, that's his affair.
0:22:57 > 0:23:02Mr Gordon, shall I go and change into my swimming costume now?
0:23:02 > 0:23:04I don't think I could stand the shock!
0:23:06 > 0:23:09Of course.
0:23:09 > 0:23:11He's doing it again. Stop him!
0:23:11 > 0:23:15All right, Jones. Be quiet. I demand an explanation.
0:23:15 > 0:23:20Keep your hair on! We're choosing a Lady Godiva for the procession.
0:23:20 > 0:23:26- Lady Godiva?- Yeah, and it's better than your silly Morris dancing!
0:23:26 > 0:23:29Our dancing is not silly!
0:23:29 > 0:23:34Is one of these girls going to ride naked through Walmington?
0:23:34 > 0:23:38Yes, it's a tribute to the brave city of Coventry.
0:23:38 > 0:23:44The girl won't be bare, of course, she'll wear fleshings.
0:23:44 > 0:23:46Fleshings?
0:23:46 > 0:23:51It's quite all right, sir. They're all-over body tights.
0:23:51 > 0:23:54We're not living in Victorian times!
0:23:54 > 0:23:57Mr Gordon, might I have a word?
0:23:57 > 0:23:59Certainly, my dear.
0:23:59 > 0:24:02He's doing it again. Stop him!
0:24:02 > 0:24:05All right! Look here, Mr Gordon...
0:24:05 > 0:24:09Just a moment, Mainwaring. I think we have the solution.
0:24:09 > 0:24:14You don't want a young girl to be Lady Godiva.
0:24:14 > 0:24:17It's just been pointed out to me
0:24:17 > 0:24:22that Lady Godiva Leofric was a woman of more mature years.
0:24:22 > 0:24:24So in the course of historical accuracy,
0:24:24 > 0:24:30I suggest that Lady Godiva should be Mrs Fox.
0:24:32 > 0:24:34Quiet, please! Quiet!
0:24:34 > 0:24:37Mrs Fox will be quite respectable,
0:24:37 > 0:24:40covered from top to toe
0:24:40 > 0:24:44in fleshings, and wearing a wig of long, golden tresses.
0:24:44 > 0:24:48You'll never cover her up with long, golden tresses...
0:24:49 > 0:24:52..you'd need a bell tent!
0:24:56 > 0:24:58Yes, Elizabeth.
0:24:58 > 0:25:01No, Elizabeth.
0:25:01 > 0:25:08I had nothing to do with the choice of Mrs Fox as Lady Godiva.
0:25:08 > 0:25:12No, dear. Yes, dear.
0:25:13 > 0:25:15It was the Town Clerk who decided
0:25:15 > 0:25:18she should be played by someone more mature...
0:25:18 > 0:25:24Somebody of rather more ample proportions.
0:25:26 > 0:25:30Yes, I know that you have more ample proportions than Mrs Fox...
0:25:30 > 0:25:34but you're not Lady Godiva, are you?
0:25:34 > 0:25:37Hello? Hello? Hello?
0:25:45 > 0:25:48Just chatting to the little woman.
0:25:48 > 0:25:51- I see. What little woman? - My wife!
0:25:53 > 0:25:59I've lost her! Since the Town Clerk asked Mrs Fox to be Lady Godiva
0:25:59 > 0:26:02her head's been turned right round!
0:26:02 > 0:26:04I'm sorry.
0:26:04 > 0:26:09This is what comes of women interfering in men's affairs.
0:26:09 > 0:26:12The platoon's been knocked sideways.
0:26:12 > 0:26:15Mum, we're about to go on parade!
0:26:15 > 0:26:19Go away, Frank. Evening, Captain Mainwaring.
0:26:19 > 0:26:23What's this about Mrs Fox playing Lady Godiva?
0:26:23 > 0:26:26- It's nothing to do with me. - You were there!
0:26:26 > 0:26:30What? Yes...I was. I was standing around.
0:26:30 > 0:26:35- A woman like Mrs Fox?- Yes. - I'm much slimmer than she is.
0:26:35 > 0:26:39- I mean what's wrong with my figure? - What? Er...nothing, nothing at all.
0:26:40 > 0:26:44You don't want to play Lady Godiva.
0:26:44 > 0:26:49- I'd like to have been asked! - Consider the effect on your son.
0:26:52 > 0:26:57His mother, riding through the streets, clad only in...
0:26:57 > 0:26:59Fleshings!
0:27:09 > 0:27:11Now...
0:27:11 > 0:27:13are we ready, men?
0:27:13 > 0:27:15When the...
0:27:15 > 0:27:19When the procession has gone past,
0:27:19 > 0:27:21Jones will open the door,
0:27:21 > 0:27:25we will burst out on to the street and start our dance.
0:27:25 > 0:27:29- Mr Mainwaring, the procession's coming now.- Good, good. Stand by.
0:27:33 > 0:27:37- Put that horse away! - It's frightfully heavy.- Come along.
0:27:37 > 0:27:41- Rest it on here. - KNOCK ON DOOR
0:27:41 > 0:27:47There's someone at the door. Don't they know we're closed? I'm coming!
0:27:47 > 0:27:52Wilson, I want you to collect as much money as you possibly can.
0:27:52 > 0:27:55Mr Jones! Mr Jones!
0:27:55 > 0:27:58Mrs Fox, what's the matter?
0:27:58 > 0:28:01- It was terrible. - Don't upset yourself,
0:28:01 > 0:28:06you're with your little Jack now. What happened?
0:28:06 > 0:28:10- What happened?- Well, I went to one of the rooms
0:28:10 > 0:28:12in the Town Hall to change,
0:28:12 > 0:28:15I put my wig and fleshings on a chair
0:28:15 > 0:28:17and went out of the room for a minute,
0:28:17 > 0:28:21and when I came back they were gone. Gone!
0:28:21 > 0:28:23GONE!
0:28:24 > 0:28:30What a pity. We're not going to see Lady Godiva after all.
0:28:30 > 0:28:33It's up to us now, men.
0:28:33 > 0:28:35There IS a Lady Godiva.
0:28:35 > 0:28:39- Good Lord, it's not Mavis, is it? - I wish you'd control that woman.
0:28:41 > 0:28:45Don't look, don't look, sir. Whatever you do, don't look!
0:29:00 > 0:29:02It IS Mrs Mainwaring!
0:29:03 > 0:29:06Oh, Mr Mainwaring, speak to me!
0:29:06 > 0:29:12Come round, come round! Poor man, he'll never get over the shock!
0:29:12 > 0:29:15No...and neither will the horse!