0:00:03 > 0:00:08Jamie Lapidus gave me a handjob last night. ..I had to tell you!
0:00:08 > 0:00:11Hope this is OK. I was dropping something off.
0:00:15 > 0:00:19- How did Sean like the watch? - I didn't want to put him on the spot
0:00:19 > 0:00:22so I had a PA put it in his car.
0:00:22 > 0:00:25SHE CLUCKS
0:00:25 > 0:00:30Al the camera guy saw you making out with Morning last week.
0:00:30 > 0:00:34- Should we talk about what happened? - I had fun.- Me, too.
0:00:34 > 0:00:38- That's it?- Pretty much. See you tomorrow.
0:01:16 > 0:01:18SHOTGUN BLAST
0:01:29 > 0:01:31LILTING RINGTONE
0:01:37 > 0:01:39I should probably get that.
0:01:39 > 0:01:41I totally disagree.
0:01:41 > 0:01:43Sorry.
0:01:43 > 0:01:45Hello?
0:01:46 > 0:01:49No, actually I'm...in the car.
0:01:49 > 0:01:50Why?
0:01:51 > 0:01:53Oh, my God.
0:01:53 > 0:01:55When?
0:01:55 > 0:01:57Does Merc know?
0:01:58 > 0:02:00OK. Tell him I'll meet him at home.
0:02:01 > 0:02:03All right, bye.
0:02:04 > 0:02:09- That was my assistant. Merc's father died.- Jesus.
0:02:09 > 0:02:14- That sucks.- Well, he's been in a coma for the last month, so... I guess it's kind of a blessing.
0:02:14 > 0:02:18Still... I'm really sorry.
0:02:18 > 0:02:22- I should go. - Like...this minute?
0:02:22 > 0:02:26Seriously, my husband's father just died.
0:02:26 > 0:02:28No, absolutely, but...
0:02:28 > 0:02:32it's not like you can bring the old guy back.
0:02:32 > 0:02:37And isn't this really a time to celebrate the living?
0:02:37 > 0:02:42- You're making a really plaintive face right now, aren't you?- I am.
0:02:42 > 0:02:47And you should see what this guy's doing. It would break your heart.
0:02:48 > 0:02:49Ohhh...
0:02:50 > 0:02:52There you go.
0:03:06 > 0:03:10'What's another word for cock?'
0:03:10 > 0:03:15- What's wrong with "cock"? - You can't say "cock" on TV here.
0:03:15 > 0:03:18No? Hmm. How about "prick"?
0:03:18 > 0:03:23- Nope.- Seriously? No "prick"? - No "prick".- How about "dick"?
0:03:23 > 0:03:25- No.- "Knob"?
0:03:25 > 0:03:28- I don't think so.- "Meat missile".
0:03:28 > 0:03:31"Meat missile"?!
0:03:31 > 0:03:33That's what the nuns called it.
0:03:33 > 0:03:35Hey...
0:03:36 > 0:03:38What do you call a cock?
0:03:38 > 0:03:40A cock.
0:03:40 > 0:03:44Right. Anything else? Something we can say on television.
0:03:44 > 0:03:46- Noodle.- Noodle?
0:03:46 > 0:03:51- That's what I call my boyfriend's. - Wow. He sounds quite the stud. - He's on anti-depressants.
0:03:51 > 0:03:54Oh, sorry.
0:03:55 > 0:03:58- Is that it? - Actually, you came in here.
0:03:58 > 0:04:03Oh, yeah. The network called. They want to move the table read to tomorrow.
0:04:03 > 0:04:09- Tomorrow? Why?- Merc Lapidus' father died and they all have to go to the funeral today.
0:04:09 > 0:04:13Oh, that's sad. OK, well, just let the stage know.
0:04:13 > 0:04:14OK.
0:04:14 > 0:04:19Do you want to send something? Like flowers or something?
0:04:19 > 0:04:22- Er...should we?- I dunno.
0:04:22 > 0:04:27- Maybe.- We could call Carol and ask. Could you get us Carol?- Huh?
0:04:28 > 0:04:30Carol.
0:04:30 > 0:04:32OK.
0:04:35 > 0:04:40- I didn't know she had a boyfriend. - You've met him. The gloomy chap with the disappointing dong.
0:04:40 > 0:04:44- Dong.- Good idea! - Carol Rance on two!
0:04:46 > 0:04:50- (BOTH) Hi, Carol! - 'Hold for Carol, please.'
0:04:51 > 0:04:54- 'Hi, guys!' - (BOTH) Hi, Carol!
0:04:54 > 0:04:57Hope we didn't mess you up too much.
0:04:57 > 0:05:01- No, that's fine. We're just sorry about Merc's father.- 'I know.'
0:05:01 > 0:05:05Don't get old. And if you do, don't have a stroke.
0:05:05 > 0:05:10We were just wondering, should we send flowers or something?
0:05:10 > 0:05:13Flowers are always nice, but you shouldn't feel obligated.
0:05:13 > 0:05:15Really.
0:05:15 > 0:05:17'Sorry for the chewing.'
0:05:17 > 0:05:23Phil Rosenthal sent Merc this ginormous condolence spread from Zabar's in New York. Ohh!
0:05:23 > 0:05:30- 'I swear, the bagels were still warm.'- So people are sending food? - 'No, not everybody.'
0:05:30 > 0:05:34A few people sent platters, a muffin basket is always nice,
0:05:34 > 0:05:40but honestly don't feel any pressure. My God! They just brought in a turkey the size of a Prius.
0:05:41 > 0:05:45I hate it when people die. I get so fat.
0:05:47 > 0:05:52"What better way to remember a friend or loved one
0:05:52 > 0:05:57"than this thoughtful bereavement basket overflowing with scrumptious mini muffins,
0:05:57 > 0:06:02"decadent chocolate brownies, butter toffee pretzels and snickerdoodle cookies,
0:06:02 > 0:06:06"wrapped in cellophane and tied with a tasteful black bow?
0:06:06 > 0:06:10"The entire family will appreciate your gesture of peace and sympathy.
0:06:10 > 0:06:14"Caution: this product may contain nuts."
0:06:14 > 0:06:17- What's up? - Trying to decide what to send Merc.
0:06:17 > 0:06:23- Smart. Can I get in on that?- Sure. - What are you thinking? - Carol suggested a muffin basket.
0:06:23 > 0:06:29- She's an idiot. Muffins went out, like, 10 years ago.- Can I leave?- Yeah.
0:06:30 > 0:06:32Not for the day, though.
0:06:32 > 0:06:33Oh.
0:06:35 > 0:06:39- So if not a muffin basket...? - We should cater a whole dinner.
0:06:39 > 0:06:44- A whole dinner? For how many? - I don't know. 50, 75. They probably have a ton of people at their house.
0:06:44 > 0:06:50- Doesn't that seem excessive? - If our ratings were great, we could send cat piss and a bag of Doritos.
0:06:50 > 0:06:57- Mmm!- But with our numbers, we can't be the cheap assholes who sent the shitty little muffin basket.
0:06:57 > 0:07:03- So we're catering a dinner for 75 people?!- What happened to "somebody dies, dig a hole, bury them"?
0:07:03 > 0:07:06It's like dealing with cave people.
0:07:09 > 0:07:11It's just so hard.
0:07:11 > 0:07:15I should be with him today. His father died.
0:07:15 > 0:07:19- I know.- 'I should he holding him and comforting him.'
0:07:19 > 0:07:25I should be helping him pick out a casket. You KNOW I would be better at it than she is,
0:07:25 > 0:07:27which I realise isn't saying a lot.
0:07:27 > 0:07:33- Well, you get to see him at the funeral, no? - 'Yeah, yeah, yeah, I know.'
0:07:33 > 0:07:35KNOCK Oh, God. I've got to hear a pitch.
0:07:35 > 0:07:40Some guy's got a TV movie about his father's triumph over autism.
0:07:40 > 0:07:44It's supposed to be inspiring. I am SO not in the mood!
0:07:44 > 0:07:46'Bye.'
0:07:50 > 0:07:53- Look familiar?- Weirdly, yes.
0:07:53 > 0:07:58I gave them some pictures of our first flat to use as inspiration.
0:07:58 > 0:08:02- Oh, my God.- Just imagine a brick wall there and the smell of curry!
0:08:02 > 0:08:05My ex-wife calling and hanging up.
0:08:05 > 0:08:07Ah, good times.
0:08:07 > 0:08:09They were.
0:08:10 > 0:08:13Hey... bad news on the catering thing.
0:08:13 > 0:08:19We're too late. Mark Burnett's doing tonight from the Grill. Tomorrow, Universal is sending deli.
0:08:19 > 0:08:24- And some asshole from Warner Bros took Friday.- We're back to muffins?
0:08:24 > 0:08:30- We were never on muffins! Anyway, I called Jamie and asked if she had any ideas.- Jamie who?
0:08:30 > 0:08:31Lapidus.
0:08:33 > 0:08:34What?
0:08:36 > 0:08:40- What?- That look. - What look?- No look.
0:08:54 > 0:08:58We've been... kinda seeing each other.
0:08:58 > 0:09:02- Who?- Me and Jamie. Well, I've been seeing her. She hasn't seen...
0:09:02 > 0:09:08- Blind jokes? Really? - Hey, she makes 'em!- Oh, my God! You and Jamie Lapidus?
0:09:08 > 0:09:10- For how long?- A few weeks.
0:09:10 > 0:09:16- Started the night of our premiere. - She gave me a handjob during the screening.- A handjob?!
0:09:16 > 0:09:21- During our show?- Relax. It's not like she was watching it.
0:09:22 > 0:09:27- I was sitting right next to you. - Gotta say - her side, much better.
0:09:27 > 0:09:32- You really are horrifying. What is it with you and other people's wives?- Yeah, yeah.
0:09:32 > 0:09:35- He's been all over me for that. - Well...
0:09:35 > 0:09:37ALARM BUZZES
0:09:37 > 0:09:44Anyway, I spoke to Jamie and there's a couple of charities they suggest people make donations to.
0:09:44 > 0:09:50- That's better than catering. What charities?- One helps homeless people get tattoos removed.
0:09:50 > 0:09:56- That is the stupidest cause ever. - I think it's for gang tattoos, stuff that stops them getting jobs.
0:09:56 > 0:09:58ALARM BUZZES
0:09:59 > 0:10:04- What was the other thing? - Canadian geese. - What about them?- I don't know!- Ah!
0:10:04 > 0:10:10It doesn't matter. These are the ones they picked. We just say, "Look, money!"
0:10:10 > 0:10:14- ALARM BUZZES - This is the worst chase scene ever.
0:10:14 > 0:10:18How big a donation are we talking? Like a hundred?
0:10:18 > 0:10:22- No. Who are you people? It's got to be at least a grand.- What?!
0:10:22 > 0:10:27- 1,000?! For geese?!- And will they even know how much we're giving?
0:10:27 > 0:10:33- The geese?- Merc and his family. - I don't know, but in case they do know, we've got to give a lot.
0:10:33 > 0:10:35ALARM BUZZES
0:10:36 > 0:10:39- I'm just going to check the back. - Sure.
0:10:40 > 0:10:45Hey, you guys! Do we all want to go to this funeral together?
0:10:45 > 0:10:49- We weren't planning on going. - Everybody's going.- Who's everybody?
0:10:49 > 0:10:54- From all the shows on the network. - Oh, shit. Really?- I'm getting texts.
0:10:54 > 0:10:57- Carol didn't say anything about it. - Duh! They never say it.
0:10:57 > 0:11:04- It's the right thing to do.- You didn't say that when my Aunt Harriet died.- She didn't run a network.
0:11:05 > 0:11:09Hey. OK, that was my agent. I've got to go to this fucking funeral.
0:11:09 > 0:11:14- Thank you.- He also said a charitable donation is too impersonal.
0:11:14 > 0:11:19- So now what?- Jerry Bruckheimer donated a dialysis machine to Cedars in Merc's father's name.
0:11:19 > 0:11:25- Jesus!- I know, but he's a partner in some dialysis company so he gets them at cost.
0:11:25 > 0:11:31- Wow. David Kelley and Michelle Pfeiffer are planting a tree. - Oh, those fuckers!
0:11:40 > 0:11:44- Wow.- What do you think? - You look like you're on the news.
0:11:44 > 0:11:51- Thank you(!)- The rental car company sent this over. It was under the seat when you turned the car in.
0:12:08 > 0:12:13- We don't have time for extensions? - No.- Oh, well. OK. Just...
0:12:13 > 0:12:17Oh, my God. Don't you love this sofa?
0:12:17 > 0:12:23- Ooh, very nice. Shopping for a sofa? - No, I'm just really into catalogues. I could read 'em all day.
0:12:23 > 0:12:26- So you count this as reading? - It's got words.
0:12:27 > 0:12:29- Ha.- What?
0:12:29 > 0:12:33- Look familiar? - The chair?- Uh-huh.
0:12:33 > 0:12:38- I don't think so.- Isn't that the one Sean has in his bedroom?
0:12:38 > 0:12:42I can't help you. I've never actually been in Sean's bedroom.
0:12:43 > 0:12:44Oh.
0:12:59 > 0:13:01Hey.
0:13:01 > 0:13:03Ooh, nice.
0:13:03 > 0:13:08- Did I give you that?- No, you did not!- I gave out a bunch last year.
0:13:08 > 0:13:13- It's a vintage Breitling.- Yeah. If you want a few more, let me know.
0:13:13 > 0:13:18- Will do.- Oh, man. This is going to be weird at this thing today.
0:13:18 > 0:13:24- Being with Jamie in front of Merc. - But easier than the last time, with no orgasms.
0:13:25 > 0:13:29- You've never been with a blind girl, right?- No!- It's good.
0:13:29 > 0:13:36- You don't have to suck in the gut. - There's a bonus.- I went out with this deaf chick. Smoking hot.
0:13:36 > 0:13:41But it was a little weird when she'd do the dirty talk. She was like, "Fuck me."
0:13:41 > 0:13:46- Stop!- I'm just saying. "Fuck me. Put your finger in my ass."
0:13:46 > 0:13:50- Ssh! Just shush. - "I like..."- Shush!
0:13:50 > 0:13:53- "If you..."- Ah! Look at you two!
0:13:53 > 0:13:56- Very nice.- Hey!
0:13:56 > 0:14:01We all clean up pretty good. We should do something fun after.
0:14:01 > 0:14:04You're assuming the funeral won't be fun.
0:14:05 > 0:14:09- I think I got you in trouble. - What?- I put my foot in it.
0:14:09 > 0:14:11Hello?
0:14:18 > 0:14:23My friend Carrie just got to the cemetery. She says it's packed.
0:14:23 > 0:14:29- Hm.- When we get there, just make sure Merc sees you. And it wouldn't hurt if you could cry a little.
0:14:29 > 0:14:34- Are you serious?- I probably will cry thinking about when my parents die.
0:14:34 > 0:14:40- Do you ever think about that? I do, all the time.- How old are they? - My mom's 91 and Dad's 93.
0:14:40 > 0:14:43How is that even possi...? Oh, right.
0:14:43 > 0:14:47I never think about me dying. Do you guys?
0:14:47 > 0:14:50More so lately.
0:14:51 > 0:14:55Do you think if you died the other Friends would come to your funeral?
0:14:58 > 0:15:00Yeah, I think they'd come.
0:15:00 > 0:15:04- Even Jennifer? - Yeah, even Jennifer.
0:15:04 > 0:15:08God, can you imagine the press? All of you together again.
0:15:08 > 0:15:12- Well, not YOU. - Right. Cos I'd be dead.
0:15:12 > 0:15:15- Sure, but still... - Still...I'd be dead.
0:15:17 > 0:15:20I hope I'm still famous when I die.
0:15:21 > 0:15:25Kinda playing fast and loose with the word "famous", no?
0:15:27 > 0:15:33- When I first got out here I went to Orson Welles' funeral. - Really? You knew Orson Welles?- Nah.
0:15:33 > 0:15:37My publicist got me in. I couldn't believe I was there.
0:15:37 > 0:15:43It was like a real Hollywood funeral. Jimmy Stewart, Bob Hope,
0:15:43 > 0:15:48Bette Davis. The biggest fucking coffin you ever saw. That guy was huge!
0:15:48 > 0:15:55I'm standing next to this woman. She's, like, in her 50s, sort of looks familiar.
0:15:55 > 0:15:58No one's paying any attention to her. Turns out it's Gloria Haywood.
0:15:58 > 0:16:01- Who's Gloria Haywood?- Exactly!
0:16:01 > 0:16:05We started talking and she's had this amazing life.
0:16:05 > 0:16:12A big affair with Bing Crosby. She won an Oscar for Best Supporting Actress in 1950.
0:16:12 > 0:16:1535 years later, no one knows who the fuck she is.
0:16:15 > 0:16:23We went out for a drink and ended up back at her apartment, this shitty little two-room place off Fountain.
0:16:23 > 0:16:27She had this ratty dog who watched us screwing all afternoon.
0:16:27 > 0:16:29It was my first celebrity fuck.
0:16:29 > 0:16:36- Hm.- I just remember thinking, "Well, at least now someone will remember you."
0:16:38 > 0:16:42A couple of years ago I googled her to see if she was still alive.
0:16:42 > 0:16:46Turns out someone called Josephine Hull won the Oscar in 1950.
0:16:46 > 0:16:50- So who was Gloria Haywood?- Hell if I know! Some nutjob who gave me crabs!
0:16:50 > 0:16:53- She gave you crabs?- Mm-hm.
0:16:53 > 0:16:56But...I learned a valuable lesson that day.
0:16:58 > 0:17:03- How to get rid of crabs?- Yep. It's come in handy more than once.
0:17:10 > 0:17:13- Ah!- Hey, I can't believe he's gone.
0:17:13 > 0:17:16I know. It's the end of an era.
0:17:17 > 0:17:22- What are you doing?! Put those away! If he sees you!- I know, but...
0:17:22 > 0:17:27I just got a text from a friend. Matthew Broderick fell out of his NBC deal this morning.
0:17:27 > 0:17:33- His people are shopping him around. - I don't care. There's a time and place...- Matthew Broderick!
0:17:33 > 0:17:37- Ferris Bueller? The Producers? - Inspector Gadget.
0:17:37 > 0:17:41First of all, I already know this. I have a call in to the agent.
0:17:41 > 0:17:46More important, today is not about work. Merc's father died.
0:17:46 > 0:17:49- We have to be here for him. - I totally hear you.
0:17:49 > 0:17:51- Sorry.- Yeah, sorry.
0:17:55 > 0:17:57What got up her ass?
0:17:57 > 0:18:01Thanks so much for coming. It means a lot.
0:18:08 > 0:18:10Wow. Nice turnout.
0:18:10 > 0:18:13OK, there's Merc. Let's do this.
0:18:15 > 0:18:17You're here!
0:18:17 > 0:18:22- How could we not be? - Matty. My pop's gone.
0:18:22 > 0:18:25- I'm sorry, man. - I still can't believe it.
0:18:25 > 0:18:29- I bet he was really proud of you. - He was. And, you know,
0:18:29 > 0:18:33- we didn't speak for, like, 12 years. - When was this?- Oh, long time ago.
0:18:34 > 0:18:37- Caught him cheating on my mom.- Wow.
0:18:37 > 0:18:43So I called the IRS on him, told them how he was cooking his books and he was indicted.
0:18:43 > 0:18:46- Jeez.- Every family has their stuff.
0:18:46 > 0:18:48Hey, you!
0:18:49 > 0:18:53- You met him, didn't you? - Just once. He was a sweetie.
0:18:53 > 0:18:57- Didn't he grab your ass? - He was so full of life!
0:18:57 > 0:19:00Not so much any more. Hey!
0:19:00 > 0:19:05You got one job - to keep her from falling in the goddamned hole!
0:19:05 > 0:19:06Sorry.
0:19:13 > 0:19:18Anyway, I'm so glad you're all here. It really means the world to me.
0:19:18 > 0:19:22And you two - all the way from London.
0:19:22 > 0:19:27- We're so sorry. - My father loved England. It was his favourite country.
0:19:27 > 0:19:32- Really?- He said it was like Europe, but in English.- That's our slogan.
0:19:32 > 0:19:37You still make me laugh, even on a day like today.
0:19:37 > 0:19:38Well...
0:19:38 > 0:19:42Excuse me. Ah! You're here...
0:19:42 > 0:19:43See you by the hole.
0:19:45 > 0:19:49I'll just say a quick hello to Carol.
0:19:50 > 0:19:55- What were you trying to say to me? - I didn't know Beverly's never been to your apartment.
0:19:55 > 0:19:59- This is important why?- I was talking about a chair in your bedroom.- OK.
0:19:59 > 0:20:03- Oh!- I'm really sorry. I wasn't even thinking.
0:20:03 > 0:20:06Don't apologise. You did nothing wrong.
0:20:06 > 0:20:10- Well...- No. You were allowed to be there. It's not like I was cheating.
0:20:10 > 0:20:16- I guess.- Yeah, we're separated. I can do whatever I want. I'm perfectly within my rights.
0:20:16 > 0:20:19- Why do you sound guilty? - Because I am.
0:20:20 > 0:20:22- So sorry.- Thank you.
0:20:23 > 0:20:25Hey...
0:20:25 > 0:20:32- You're here.- You holding up OK? - I've probably hugged 400 people already!
0:20:32 > 0:20:36- Let's make it 401. - Sounds good to me.
0:20:37 > 0:20:39So sorry for your loss.
0:20:41 > 0:20:44- (I wanna kiss your neck.)- Mmm.
0:20:44 > 0:20:46(You feel so good.)
0:20:46 > 0:20:48And now it's too long.
0:20:49 > 0:20:52He's in a better place.
0:20:52 > 0:20:54How are you?
0:20:56 > 0:21:01- Hello again.- William Shatner's here. - The real William Shatner?
0:21:01 > 0:21:06- The real William Shatner! - Please tell me you didn't do your impression.- Inside I was like,
0:21:06 > 0:21:11- "You Klingon bastard! You killed my son!"- Stop it! Today is sad enough.
0:21:11 > 0:21:16- Oh, by the way, thank you so much for this. - You're welcome. Happy birthday.
0:21:16 > 0:21:22- Sorry. I just got it today. - Ah. I was wondering when you didn't say anything.
0:21:22 > 0:21:27- I thought maybe I'd got the wrong thing. - God, no. I love it. It's perfect.
0:21:27 > 0:21:29Oh.
0:21:29 > 0:21:30What?
0:21:30 > 0:21:35- What time do you have?- Quarter to. Why?- It's 20 minutes behind.
0:21:35 > 0:21:39- Oh, did I not mention it's a piece of shit?- Put that in the card.
0:21:39 > 0:21:41I'll get it fixed.
0:21:47 > 0:21:49So...
0:21:49 > 0:21:54- Hm?- Morning was saying something about a conversation she had with you...- Yep.
0:21:54 > 0:21:59..where she mentioned to you that, um...she'd been in my apartment.
0:22:01 > 0:22:07- You don't owe me any explanation. - I really don't.- I just said that. And I believe she said bedroom.
0:22:07 > 0:22:09Right. Yeah, bedroom, yeah.
0:22:14 > 0:22:18- But since you brought it up...- Yeah. - This was when?- On my birthday.
0:22:18 > 0:22:21So you weren't alone? Good, good.
0:22:25 > 0:22:29- For what it's worth, I was only with her the one time.- Mm.
0:22:30 > 0:22:35So you were actually...with her... with her? I assumed, but...
0:22:35 > 0:22:37I w-was with her.
0:22:37 > 0:22:42I was with her. I was with her. With her I was. I can't stop!
0:22:42 > 0:22:43Try!
0:22:49 > 0:22:55- So just to clarify...- Yeah. Go. - This wasn't something that was going on back when...- Right.
0:22:55 > 0:22:59- ..I thought there might be something going on?- No.- Cos I was thinking,
0:22:59 > 0:23:04- "Mmm! Maybe I wasn't so crazy." - No, you were.
0:23:04 > 0:23:08- Oh, good.- So I see no reason to feel guilty.- Absolutely none.
0:23:08 > 0:23:12- After what happened with you and... - Yes. I totally agree.
0:23:12 > 0:23:18- It's not like we're even together. - No. We're not together. We, we are...not.
0:23:23 > 0:23:27If everyone is ready, it's time to begin.
0:23:40 > 0:23:42What's wrong?
0:23:43 > 0:23:46No, it's silly.
0:23:47 > 0:23:49Tell me.
0:23:58 > 0:24:00I just always assumed that...
0:24:02 > 0:24:04that when I died you'd be there.
0:24:06 > 0:24:09Or if you died, I'd be there.
0:24:10 > 0:24:12Now I'm thinking
0:24:12 > 0:24:15who knows? Maybe not.
0:24:21 > 0:24:22Oh.
0:24:25 > 0:24:27Told you it was silly.
0:24:43 > 0:24:46It's OK. He had a full life.
0:25:04 > 0:25:07There's an old Hebrew proverb.
0:25:07 > 0:25:10Say not in grief he is no more,
0:25:10 > 0:25:14but live in thankfulness that he was.
0:25:14 > 0:25:21I know everyone here today is thankful that Leo Lapidus touched our lives.
0:25:21 > 0:25:25For 49 years he was a devoted husband to our Selma,
0:25:25 > 0:25:32he was a loving father to Mindy and to Merc and he adored his grandchildren - Sam, Tess, Emma,
0:25:32 > 0:25:39Brett and Rose. But he'd trade you all in a heartbeat for an eight handicap.
0:25:39 > 0:25:43It's OK. It's all right to laugh. Leo wanted to leave us laughing.
0:25:43 > 0:25:47May his memory endure among us as a blessing.
0:25:48 > 0:25:51RABBI SINGS IN HEBREW
0:25:54 > 0:25:57MOBILE PHONE RINGS
0:26:05 > 0:26:09I'm so sorry! I thought it was turned off.
0:26:09 > 0:26:12Who was it? Everyone is here.
0:26:12 > 0:26:16- Matthew Broderick's agent. - That fucker didn't come?
0:26:16 > 0:26:20- I'll tell you later. - What? Tell me now.
0:26:20 > 0:26:22Broderick's available.
0:26:22 > 0:26:25Seriously?
0:26:25 > 0:26:28NBC couldn't close the deal.
0:26:28 > 0:26:30(Get him back.)
0:26:32 > 0:26:34Now?!
0:26:42 > 0:26:44Hold for Merc Lapidus.
0:26:48 > 0:26:51Sorry. This is important.
0:26:55 > 0:26:58Yeah. Merc. Right.
0:27:21 > 0:27:24RESUMES SINGING
0:27:50 > 0:27:53Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd