0:00:02 > 0:00:08This programme contains some strong language
0:00:08 > 0:00:12This programme contains adult humour
0:00:12 > 0:00:15Do you think there's, like, one woman for everyone?
0:00:15 > 0:00:18She'd get really sore. That's like three billion dicks.
0:00:18 > 0:00:24- I mean, like, one woman for every one man. Like soulmates.- Nah.
0:00:24 > 0:00:27If we was intended to be with just one woman,
0:00:27 > 0:00:29there wouldn't be all kinds of different-looking women.
0:00:29 > 0:00:34Little ones, big ones, littler ones, bigger ones.
0:00:34 > 0:00:38- Even littler one. - I get where you're going.- Believe.
0:00:38 > 0:00:40I've tried to forget about Amara. I have.
0:00:40 > 0:00:43But it's so hard when you see someone every day.
0:00:43 > 0:00:47It's like trying to forget about... having legs.
0:00:47 > 0:00:49Maybe you should just cut your legs off. 4th of July style.
0:00:49 > 0:00:53- That's not what I'm trying to say. - OK, then, just quit!
0:00:53 > 0:00:54Walk out the door.
0:00:54 > 0:00:58Just turn round, don't work here any more.
0:00:58 > 0:01:01I can't quit. This place is really close to my house.
0:01:01 > 0:01:03I see your dilemma, bro.
0:01:03 > 0:01:04But you need to put an end to it.
0:01:04 > 0:01:07Get it on with Amara, or don't get it on,
0:01:07 > 0:01:09but please, please stop talking about it.
0:01:09 > 0:01:12Cause I nod, and I say things, but I do not give a shit.
0:01:12 > 0:01:14You feel me?
0:01:19 > 0:01:21You know, today, I woke up,
0:01:21 > 0:01:26and for the first time in a very long time, I didn't reach out to
0:01:26 > 0:01:30an empty space in my bed to try and touch Gareth's soft little cheeks.
0:01:30 > 0:01:33And I didn't spend the next five minutes screaming,
0:01:33 > 0:01:36"Gareth, why, why did you go!?"
0:01:36 > 0:01:38I just... I just got up.
0:01:39 > 0:01:42D'ya know, I think I might finally be over him.
0:01:43 > 0:01:47- Mary...- Well now I can just concentrate on work, can't I?
0:01:47 > 0:01:52And... And if tonight goes the way me think it will
0:01:52 > 0:01:58and we win the coveted Most Improved Restaurant award,
0:01:58 > 0:02:02well, then today will officially be the best day of my life, since
0:02:02 > 0:02:06Gareth bought me that fireman's costume for the old, er, boudoir.
0:02:06 > 0:02:09Mary, I just wanted to say,
0:02:09 > 0:02:13we'll send the results of your cervical smear test next week.
0:02:13 > 0:02:15Oh, yeah, yeah, of course, yeah, sure.
0:02:18 > 0:02:21Sorry, erm, sorry, just out of interest, erm,
0:02:21 > 0:02:23how's everything looking down there?
0:02:23 > 0:02:25All looks well.
0:02:27 > 0:02:30Erm, just, sorry, I just mean aesthetically,
0:02:30 > 0:02:34erm, is everything, erm, on trend?
0:02:35 > 0:02:36Kosher?
0:02:36 > 0:02:39Well, that's not really my place to...
0:02:39 > 0:02:44Beyonce has one. Apparently. Calls it the Beyonshave.
0:02:46 > 0:02:48I should go.
0:02:48 > 0:02:49Hey, check this out.
0:02:51 > 0:02:53Poultry in motion, innit?
0:02:55 > 0:02:56Hey, what's up with you?
0:02:56 > 0:02:59That shit always gets at least a middle finger.
0:02:59 > 0:03:03- Me and Trey broke up. - Aw, man. That's sad.
0:03:06 > 0:03:09Did he be-Trey you?
0:03:09 > 0:03:10Oh! There it is!
0:03:16 > 0:03:19- Ooh, look at you!- Whoo! Fancy!
0:03:19 > 0:03:21Where are you off to?
0:03:21 > 0:03:22Ah. Awkward.
0:03:24 > 0:03:28Erm, well I put off, er, telling you this until now, so that you
0:03:28 > 0:03:31two could just deal with the pain of not being invited, er, quickly.
0:03:31 > 0:03:33What are you talking about?
0:03:33 > 0:03:39Well, tonight is The Fifth Annual Seriously Fried Chicken Awards!
0:03:39 > 0:03:41They actually have those?
0:03:41 > 0:03:43Oh, yeah. They have 'em, babe.
0:03:43 > 0:03:46The cream of the cream of the chicken world will be there.
0:03:46 > 0:03:50Well, someone's got to man and woman the shop.
0:03:50 > 0:03:53Well, as the newest employees, I've chosen you two.
0:03:53 > 0:03:56But don't worry, cause I've put you both on double pay.
0:03:56 > 0:03:57- Bullshit!- Balls!
0:03:59 > 0:04:04You know, ever since I joined you here, it's been a private dream
0:04:04 > 0:04:09of mine to bring home the coveted Most Improved Restaurant award.
0:04:09 > 0:04:11And now we've been nominated.
0:04:11 > 0:04:13I mean, arguably we haven't improved
0:04:13 > 0:04:18so much as not got dramatically worse, but still, yay, us!
0:04:18 > 0:04:22And tonight, you, my loyal staff, will all be there
0:04:22 > 0:04:25to share in the glory. Except Joe and Amara.
0:04:26 > 0:04:30Oh! Oh, taxi's here! Showtime!
0:04:33 > 0:04:36Come on, Joe, I need a hand with the breasts.
0:04:36 > 0:04:38The chicken breasts in the freezer.
0:04:38 > 0:04:42Not the human breasts in my bra. Grow up.
0:04:42 > 0:04:46Tell that cab man to hold up, just forgot my giantgantic condoms.
0:04:46 > 0:04:48I hear them girls from Norbiton branch are well horny!
0:04:48 > 0:04:51I can't believe they actually have chicken awards.
0:04:51 > 0:04:53Yeah! They have awards for everything.
0:04:53 > 0:04:56- Got awards for best flyer... - What?
0:04:57 > 0:05:00- Ed!- Ed! Ed!
0:05:00 > 0:05:01You can thank me later, chief!
0:05:07 > 0:05:10What the hell does he think he's doing?
0:05:10 > 0:05:13He never thinks about anything. He just does it.
0:05:13 > 0:05:15Like when he stapled all his fingers together.
0:05:15 > 0:05:18- Why would he do that?- I don't know, that's what I'm trying to say.
0:05:18 > 0:05:20He doesn't think about anything. He just does it.
0:05:20 > 0:05:22We'll find a way out of here. Don't worry.
0:05:22 > 0:05:25We may be locked in the freezer, but on the plus side,
0:05:25 > 0:05:28this is actually an improvement on the chicken awards, so...
0:05:28 > 0:05:30MUSIC PLAYS
0:05:37 > 0:05:43Oh, wow. All the old faces are here. And look!
0:05:43 > 0:05:47It's Clive Bagshawe. Working his magic.
0:05:47 > 0:05:48God, he is such a brilliant man.
0:05:48 > 0:05:51I've found our table. Let's get drunk.
0:06:00 > 0:06:03Shall we shuffle these place names a little, mix it up?
0:06:03 > 0:06:05Don't want to have Shontalla all to meself.
0:06:05 > 0:06:09Yes, yes, yes, the man has a point, come on, shuffle away, shuffle away.
0:06:09 > 0:06:12No, no, because it's designated seating.
0:06:12 > 0:06:15This is the Fifth Annual Seriously Fried Chicken Awards, guys,
0:06:15 > 0:06:18it's not the Glastonbury festival.
0:06:18 > 0:06:21- Mary. - Oh, my God. I know that voice.
0:06:21 > 0:06:25- It's Gareth.- It's Gareth. - Hey. It's Gareth!
0:06:25 > 0:06:26Oh, my God, it's Gareth.
0:06:29 > 0:06:33Gareth. Well, this is... This is a surprise.
0:06:33 > 0:06:36I wasn't expecting to see you here.
0:06:36 > 0:06:38Well, there's been something of a recent merger between my company
0:06:38 > 0:06:41and yours, thanks to your introduction.
0:06:41 > 0:06:43It's a very exciting collaboration.
0:06:43 > 0:06:46What are you doing for Seriously Fried Chicken?
0:06:46 > 0:06:51What am I not doing? Photocopying. Printing. Laminating.
0:06:51 > 0:06:54Hole-punching... I can't say much more than that.
0:06:54 > 0:06:58Actually, I think I just told you everything. Shit. Don't tell anyone.
0:06:58 > 0:07:01So your shop's just doing all their printing?
0:07:01 > 0:07:03It's a two-way street Mary.
0:07:03 > 0:07:04I mean, yes, we do their printing for them,
0:07:04 > 0:07:06but they pay us for said printing.
0:07:06 > 0:07:08It's what they call a merger.
0:07:09 > 0:07:11I don't think it is.
0:07:11 > 0:07:13I think it is. You know what they say in my business?
0:07:13 > 0:07:17You got to keep moving forward, otherwise you're just stationery.
0:07:18 > 0:07:23Holy mackerel, I haven't laughed that much in years.
0:07:23 > 0:07:25- So, how have you been? - I don't miss you.
0:07:26 > 0:07:30Do you sometimes call me and then not say anything, and then hang up?
0:07:30 > 0:07:33- No.- I have caller ID, Mary.
0:07:33 > 0:07:37I have you on speed dial and sometimes the cats press the buttons.
0:07:37 > 0:07:41- I hear you breathing heavily. - They have asthma.
0:07:41 > 0:07:45Listen, Mary, erm... I was wondering, if it's OK with you,
0:07:45 > 0:07:47if I could swing by your place some time.
0:07:47 > 0:07:52Oh, God, yes, yes, we can make this work, Gareth, I won't
0:07:52 > 0:07:55burn your ciabatta any more. That was so stupid of me.
0:07:55 > 0:07:57No, I think I left my karate suit there.
0:07:57 > 0:08:01And I can't do karate without my karate suit. I'd look ridiculous!
0:08:01 > 0:08:04Just... just imagine that! Picture it!
0:08:06 > 0:08:10Oh, my. Oh! I haven't laughed that much in years.
0:08:10 > 0:08:13The karate suit is gone, Gareth.
0:08:15 > 0:08:18- Like you. - Oh, balls. They're really expensive.
0:08:20 > 0:08:23I'll see you, Mare.
0:08:23 > 0:08:25- Help! HELP!- Stand back.
0:08:28 > 0:08:31- HELP! HELP!- That's what I was doing. - But I was doing it louder.
0:08:31 > 0:08:34I thought you were going to knock down the door or something.
0:08:34 > 0:08:35It's made of metal.
0:08:35 > 0:08:37It's freezing in here.
0:08:37 > 0:08:39That's kind of the idea behind the freezer.
0:08:39 > 0:08:42This day couldn't get any worse.
0:08:42 > 0:08:43First Trey breaks up with me,
0:08:43 > 0:08:46and now I'm stuck in a freezing cold freezer.
0:08:46 > 0:08:48He broke up with you?
0:08:48 > 0:08:50Why do you look so happy?
0:08:50 > 0:08:51Sorry.
0:08:53 > 0:08:56Look, I'm going to get us out of here. I have an idea.
0:08:57 > 0:09:01HELP! HELP!
0:09:04 > 0:09:07How am I supposed to resist that?
0:09:07 > 0:09:10How am I supposed to try and live a normal life,
0:09:10 > 0:09:13knowing that a man like that is out there?
0:09:13 > 0:09:16You should get a brain operation to like, you know,
0:09:16 > 0:09:19erase the memories of him out your brain, yeah?
0:09:19 > 0:09:21A mate of mine once did it on elephant tranquilisers.
0:09:21 > 0:09:23I don't have any elephant tranquilisers.
0:09:23 > 0:09:26OK, how about this? You need to make Gary jealous, right?
0:09:26 > 0:09:29He needs to see that you can get it elsewhere.
0:09:29 > 0:09:33And the moment he sees that, Gary will have the horn for Mary Fawn.
0:09:33 > 0:09:37Make him jealous? What about Clive?
0:09:37 > 0:09:39Gareth has always admired Clive.
0:09:39 > 0:09:41He looks up to him as a businessman.
0:09:41 > 0:09:44I mean, this would drive him really potty.
0:09:44 > 0:09:46Imagine, me kissing Clive Bagshawe.
0:09:46 > 0:09:48That's not enough.
0:09:48 > 0:09:51You want to make him jealous, you've got to take it further.
0:09:51 > 0:09:55- Tongues?- Ergh, no! Just like, give him a hand job or something.
0:09:55 > 0:09:58Hand job, eh? Crumbs. I've never given one of those before.
0:09:58 > 0:10:02Always fancied, erm, giving it a whirl. Gareth wasn't a fan.
0:10:02 > 0:10:05He preferred just to shout at me while I sucked his feet.
0:10:07 > 0:10:09When do you think they're coming back?
0:10:09 > 0:10:12They're not. We're supposed to lock up.
0:10:12 > 0:10:15- We could be here all night. - And my phone's outside.
0:10:16 > 0:10:20Maybe we should huddle together and use our bodies for warmth.
0:10:23 > 0:10:26You're right. That's better.
0:10:26 > 0:10:27Yeah. It's really nice.
0:10:28 > 0:10:33And warming. It's all about sharing body heat and survival, really.
0:10:33 > 0:10:37So... You're single now. You and Trey...no more.
0:10:39 > 0:10:43- Why did you break-up? - We wanted different things.
0:10:43 > 0:10:46He wanted to sleep with other girls and I didn't.
0:10:46 > 0:10:50I really liked him, I thought maybe it was going somewhere.
0:10:51 > 0:10:55I don't know what it is with me. Guys just don't want to commit.
0:10:55 > 0:10:58I don't see why anyone going out with you would want to sleep
0:10:58 > 0:10:59with anyone else.
0:11:00 > 0:11:02That's sweet, Joe.
0:11:03 > 0:11:06What's less sweet is you getting a boner while hugging me.
0:11:08 > 0:11:10You smell like apples.
0:11:10 > 0:11:11It's probably the apples.
0:11:13 > 0:11:14Why's Mary freezing apples?
0:11:16 > 0:11:20And now, please welcome regional branch manager Clive Bagshawe!
0:11:29 > 0:11:35It's been a madcap year for Seriously Fried Chicken.
0:11:35 > 0:11:40It's continued to explore chicken salad mega-meal with mayonnaise...
0:11:40 > 0:11:43Sorry, it's the wrong cards there.
0:11:43 > 0:11:47There's only one way we're going to get through this thing.
0:11:49 > 0:11:51I stole it from the bar.
0:11:51 > 0:11:55Every time Bagshawe says the word chicken you have to take a shot.
0:11:55 > 0:11:58All right, my Nubian friend, you're on.
0:11:58 > 0:12:04We're also excited to be presenting a new menu this year.
0:12:04 > 0:12:06New chicken bignuggets, chicken chowburger,
0:12:06 > 0:12:12chicken chicken burger, the triple chicken chicken chicken
0:12:12 > 0:12:18and the chicken chicken fiesta AKA the festival of chicken.
0:12:20 > 0:12:24That's less of a dish, more of a challenge.
0:12:27 > 0:12:33Anyway, now to hand over the actual awards, I'd like to introduce
0:12:33 > 0:12:41someone who needs no introduction, a born raconteur,
0:12:41 > 0:12:45Vice-President of Sales, Double Chicken Bignuggets...
0:12:45 > 0:12:47Sorry, wrong card. Er...
0:12:48 > 0:12:50Mike Fagins!
0:13:00 > 0:13:01Thank you, Clive.
0:13:01 > 0:13:06This really has been an incredible year in terms of sales.
0:13:10 > 0:13:12That was amazing.
0:13:12 > 0:13:16You're like something out of McBusted or something.
0:13:16 > 0:13:21Just, you know, seeing you up there on stage, it was like pure sex.
0:13:21 > 0:13:22OK.
0:13:26 > 0:13:31Oh, Clive, you're such a silly! You're such a sillybug!
0:13:35 > 0:13:37What are you doing?
0:13:37 > 0:13:42Putting my hand on your leg. It's nice, isn't it?
0:13:42 > 0:13:45Excuse me. I'm...going to the bathroom.
0:13:47 > 0:13:51Clive, the awards have only just...
0:13:51 > 0:13:54Oh, I see. Oh, right.
0:13:57 > 0:14:01OK, Clive, prepare to be hand-jobbed.
0:14:01 > 0:14:06Gareth used to like it when I put on my jeans and did my big daddy voice.
0:14:06 > 0:14:08Do you like that?
0:14:08 > 0:14:11Miss Fawn, are you trying to seduce me?
0:14:11 > 0:14:17Mr Bagshawe... Yeah. Is that not clear? Am I doing it wrong?
0:14:17 > 0:14:22Mary, what are you doing? I'm not interested in sleeping with you.
0:14:22 > 0:14:24I'm not talking about sleeping with you.
0:14:24 > 0:14:26Just a brisk hand job in the cubicle.
0:14:26 > 0:14:29Mary, I'm gay.
0:14:36 > 0:14:38I could turn around...?
0:14:39 > 0:14:43A woman's anus is completely different from a man's anus, Mary.
0:14:43 > 0:14:44You should know that.
0:14:45 > 0:14:49Yeah, that... Yeah, that was stupid of me.
0:14:49 > 0:14:52I cannot pretend that your anus is the anus of a man.
0:14:52 > 0:14:54They're in no way similar.
0:14:54 > 0:14:59- I don't know what I was thinking... - Besides, I'm seeing someone.
0:15:01 > 0:15:04Is there any chance we could forget any of this ever happened?
0:15:04 > 0:15:07Mary, I am aware that my raw sexuality can be
0:15:07 > 0:15:09a problem for some people.
0:15:09 > 0:15:11It's landed me in many a sticky situation.
0:15:12 > 0:15:14We'll talk about this next week.
0:15:16 > 0:15:18Thanks, Clive.
0:15:27 > 0:15:30How can Rizwan Rupar win for best side dish?
0:15:30 > 0:15:33Anyone could've done fucking peas!
0:15:33 > 0:15:35What about my frozen apples?!
0:15:37 > 0:15:39Come on, let's get drunk.
0:15:39 > 0:15:42Not until someone says the word chicken.
0:15:42 > 0:15:45- Chicken, chicken, chicken, chicken. - Shit.
0:15:49 > 0:15:53I'm scared. What if we're in here all night?
0:15:53 > 0:15:56- Someone will come back after the awards.- What if they don't?
0:15:56 > 0:15:59I keep thinking of everything I haven't done yet.
0:15:59 > 0:16:02Like the nail appointment I had this weekend.
0:16:02 > 0:16:04Or trying that new Chinese place with Shanie.
0:16:04 > 0:16:06I wouldn't have minded having sex before I died.
0:16:06 > 0:16:09Would be right up there at the top of the list.
0:16:09 > 0:16:12Right above getting a new job, falling in love with you,
0:16:12 > 0:16:15getting married and having children called Karima and Steve.
0:16:15 > 0:16:17One for you and one for me, you know?
0:16:19 > 0:16:21I shouldn't have said that out loud.
0:16:21 > 0:16:26It's sweet. But... Seriously, you've never had sex?
0:16:26 > 0:16:30Not with something that wasn't a watermelon.
0:16:30 > 0:16:34I did ask permission first, if that's what you're wondering.
0:16:34 > 0:16:39You're funny. I can't believe someone like you is still a virgin.
0:16:39 > 0:16:41It's weird, isn't it?
0:16:41 > 0:16:43To be a virgin at my age and not for religious reasons.
0:16:43 > 0:16:47I mean, I have done stuff, but...
0:16:47 > 0:16:49for some reason, it's never really happened.
0:16:50 > 0:16:52Never gone the full enchilada.
0:16:56 > 0:17:01Joe, you're sweet, you're funny and you're kind.
0:17:03 > 0:17:06Girls would be lucky to have someone like you.
0:17:14 > 0:17:22MUSIC PLAYS
0:17:26 > 0:17:29There will now follow a short break while we re-set
0:17:29 > 0:17:33the stage for the comic stylings of the Norbiton branch.
0:17:34 > 0:17:38Er, we've been warned that there may be an element of strobe lighting,
0:17:38 > 0:17:42but I've been informed that it's just in fact Catherine
0:17:42 > 0:17:45switching off the lights and then on again, really quickly.
0:17:47 > 0:17:49Thank you.
0:17:51 > 0:17:54That's not a trampoline! That's my Volkswagen!
0:17:54 > 0:17:55And it really was!
0:17:59 > 0:18:04Oh, Shont, why have we not hung it out more often?
0:18:04 > 0:18:06You and I, we've got so much in common!
0:18:06 > 0:18:13Yeah! Cos we both, you know, we're both here
0:18:13 > 0:18:16and we both came in a taxi and... Yeah!
0:18:19 > 0:18:22Shontal. I think we should go on holiday.
0:18:24 > 0:18:28I've always wanted to go scuba diving in the Galapagos.
0:18:28 > 0:18:32I've always wanted you to go scuba diving in the Galapagos!
0:18:32 > 0:18:34Well, you could come with me! Me and you, you and me.
0:18:34 > 0:18:37Amazing!
0:18:37 > 0:18:38Well, I'll book it now!
0:18:38 > 0:18:40I've got me phone and me credit cards.
0:18:40 > 0:18:43Oh, do it! Just fucking do it, Derek!
0:18:46 > 0:18:51Oh, God, I am so drunk. I've ruined everything.
0:18:55 > 0:18:58Did you see that look? He's angry.
0:18:58 > 0:19:02- Nah, mate, he's giving you the sexy eyes, isn't it?- Really?
0:19:02 > 0:19:05I look at a girl like that, she knows that I'm trying to book
0:19:05 > 0:19:07a meeting room, cos it's business time.
0:19:07 > 0:19:09Oh. Good gosh.
0:19:09 > 0:19:12Go. This is your chance to get Gary jealous.
0:19:12 > 0:19:16Here I go. Here I bloody go!
0:19:18 > 0:19:21And when you're done, get me some snacks!
0:19:21 > 0:19:23Clive?
0:19:27 > 0:19:33Gareth, er, leave us, please, I need to speak to Clive.
0:19:34 > 0:19:36Mary, Clive told me what happened.
0:19:36 > 0:19:38And you need to keep your hands off him.
0:19:39 > 0:19:43Clive and I are together. I love him, Mary.
0:19:44 > 0:19:48- What?- What? I thought we were just doing stuff.
0:19:48 > 0:19:55No. Well, yes we are. But I love you, Clive.
0:19:55 > 0:19:57I'm all in.
0:19:57 > 0:20:01If there was a Clive Bagshawe fan club, I would be president
0:20:01 > 0:20:05and treasurer and also a member.
0:20:05 > 0:20:08If that were allowed under club regulations.
0:20:08 > 0:20:10Because you are brilliant.
0:20:14 > 0:20:18- You two...are an item? - I should leave.
0:20:21 > 0:20:25Gareth... All this time you've been...?
0:20:25 > 0:20:28Why do you think I made you wear that fireman outfit, Mary?
0:20:28 > 0:20:33And that stick-on moustache? And kept making you use that deep voice?
0:20:33 > 0:20:35I thought it was just role play.
0:20:35 > 0:20:38I thought it was just fun and games.
0:20:38 > 0:20:40Gareth, did I turn you?
0:20:42 > 0:20:45Oh, Mary, I owe you a debt of gratitude.
0:20:47 > 0:20:50I could've been with someone younger, more attractive,
0:20:50 > 0:20:56more intelligent, and I might not have realised for ages.
0:20:56 > 0:21:01You helped me make that leap. Your mediocrity gave me wings.
0:21:06 > 0:21:11Oh, Gareth, there is just one more thing.
0:21:21 > 0:21:25- And the winner is Mary Fawn! - That's me!
0:21:30 > 0:21:33Come up with me!
0:21:44 > 0:21:49Everything in my life has always been about work.
0:21:51 > 0:21:54And there was a time about ten minutes ago,
0:21:54 > 0:21:57when this would've meant the world to me.
0:21:57 > 0:22:00To be most improved.
0:22:00 > 0:22:08But all I know is that I have given my life to my restaurant.
0:22:09 > 0:22:14And I've gotten nothing in return.
0:22:14 > 0:22:20Because work cannot fill the hole in your heart.
0:22:21 > 0:22:26You can't wake up in the morning to a nice career.
0:22:26 > 0:22:29You can't take your career ice skating.
0:22:29 > 0:22:33You can't take your career on a picnic.
0:22:33 > 0:22:39You can't take your career for brunch with the papers. You can't...
0:22:39 > 0:22:42What else can't you do with your career?
0:22:42 > 0:22:44We're not actually doing speeches.
0:22:45 > 0:22:49You can't have your hair stroked by your career!
0:22:50 > 0:22:56There's more to life than just the four walls of the restaurant.
0:22:56 > 0:23:00Please, live your life.
0:23:02 > 0:23:04LIVE IT!
0:23:04 > 0:23:06LIVE IT!
0:23:15 > 0:23:16MUSIC PLAYS
0:23:30 > 0:23:32D'you want to hear something embarrassing?
0:23:34 > 0:23:37I'm a virgin, too.
0:23:37 > 0:23:41- Really?- Yeah.- How?
0:23:41 > 0:23:45Like you, never happened for some reason.
0:23:45 > 0:23:47Never felt like the right person.
0:23:50 > 0:23:52That's why Trey really broke up with me.
0:23:54 > 0:23:56That's why he slept with someone else.
0:23:57 > 0:24:01God, I've never told anyone that.
0:24:03 > 0:24:06I suppose it doesn't matter now if we're going to freeze to death.
0:24:07 > 0:24:09If we're going to freeze to death,
0:24:09 > 0:24:12maybe we should try not to die virgins.
0:24:17 > 0:24:21- Hey, hey, hey, lovebirds! - Ed, you absolute shithead.
0:24:21 > 0:24:25- You're welcome.- Go away and lock us in again.- What?
0:24:25 > 0:24:27You can let go of me now, Joe.
0:24:27 > 0:24:28Joe?
0:24:36 > 0:24:39I thought you two needed some time to work it out, innit?
0:24:39 > 0:24:41And listen, you're going to have amazing babies.
0:24:41 > 0:24:44As long as they look like you and think like him.
0:24:44 > 0:24:47Cos if they look like you, and think like you,
0:24:47 > 0:24:50Then my advice is to leave it on a mountain.
0:24:50 > 0:24:53That's Chinese peasant style, that is. Respect.
0:24:55 > 0:24:58- Good to be warm.- Yeah.
0:24:58 > 0:25:01So, do you want to get a drink or something?
0:25:02 > 0:25:06What happened in there, I was cold and scared.
0:25:06 > 0:25:08- I wasn't thinking. - I love you!
0:25:10 > 0:25:12Thoughts?
0:25:13 > 0:25:17It's weird. I feel like our relationship's changed.
0:25:19 > 0:25:21It's like it's moved on to another level.
0:25:22 > 0:25:24- I do love you, Joe.- Yes!
0:25:24 > 0:25:26- As a friend.- Shit!
0:25:39 > 0:25:43Oh, hi, Joe! Oh, I thought everyone would've gone home.
0:25:43 > 0:25:45I was stuck in the freezer.
0:25:45 > 0:25:48Oh, no! Did the emergency door release not work?
0:25:49 > 0:25:51Emergency door release?
0:25:51 > 0:25:54Uh, no. No, it didn't.
0:25:54 > 0:25:56Out of interest, where is the emergency door release?
0:25:56 > 0:26:00Well, it's by the door, behind the frozen apples.
0:26:00 > 0:26:02Should have gone with bloody peas though, right?
0:26:02 > 0:26:05Right. Er, how was the thing?
0:26:06 > 0:26:09We won.
0:26:09 > 0:26:10Yay, us.
0:26:17 > 0:26:19Where did you get that from?
0:26:19 > 0:26:22Underneath the counter.
0:26:22 > 0:26:25Didn't you see? You were looking right at me when I did it.
0:26:25 > 0:26:27Never mind... I could use one.
0:26:30 > 0:26:32To us.
0:26:40 > 0:26:42Are we going to talk about last night?
0:26:44 > 0:26:46- Derek. - We shared something, you and I.
0:26:46 > 0:26:49We were drunk, it should never have happened.
0:26:49 > 0:26:54But it did. We can't undo what's been done, because it's been done.
0:26:56 > 0:26:59We're going on a three-week scuba diving holiday to the Galapagos,
0:26:59 > 0:27:02cos there's a very hefty cancellation fee.
0:27:04 > 0:27:05Don't forget your flippers!
0:27:12 > 0:27:14Morning, snugglebunny.
0:27:14 > 0:27:18Uh... What?
0:27:18 > 0:27:20I made you some breakfast.
0:27:20 > 0:27:23I thought you'd need to get your strength back after last night.
0:27:24 > 0:27:28- Last night. When we...? - Three times.
0:27:28 > 0:27:29Oh, my word, Joe.
0:27:30 > 0:27:33If only you displayed that sort of enthusiasm at work!
0:27:33 > 0:27:36- Oh, God. - Come on, then, eat up.
0:27:36 > 0:27:38Cos we'll need to be in work soon.
0:27:38 > 0:27:41Although it doesn't matter if you're late,
0:27:41 > 0:27:44because the boss' boyfriend gets special privileges.
0:27:46 > 0:27:48As well as free nuggets...
0:27:57 > 0:27:59I really need to get a new job.