Episode 6

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0:00:13 > 0:00:17Tea. I got some bacon on, d'you want a sandwich or will you have your fag first?

0:00:17 > 0:00:19Oh, I'll take the sandwich.

0:00:19 > 0:00:21Tidy.

0:00:21 > 0:00:24- So how you feelin', all right?- Yeah.

0:00:24 > 0:00:28- Excited, I am. I can't wait to be honest.- You're going through with it then?

0:00:28 > 0:00:31- No more rows on the doorstep or nothin'?- Mum! Tell him!- What?!

0:00:31 > 0:00:34Jason, stop winding her up, you know we're not to talk about the row.

0:00:34 > 0:00:37- It was a little blip. - MOBILE RINGS - Didn't sound like a blip to me.

0:00:37 > 0:00:39Hola Jose, Como estas?

0:00:39 > 0:00:42I hope people aren't going to go on about it, Mum.

0:00:42 > 0:00:44We made up and that's all that matters.

0:00:44 > 0:00:48I know I've been engaged a lot but this is my first actual wedding day, isn't it?

0:00:48 > 0:00:50I remember my first wedding day.

0:00:50 > 0:00:54I woke up in Vegas. Didn't know where I was.

0:00:54 > 0:00:58- Looked round, I was in bed with two of Gladys Knight's Pips. - Where was your husband?

0:00:58 > 0:01:02I don't know. I still don't know to this day, that annulment cost me a fortune.

0:01:02 > 0:01:06DOOR OPENS # I'm getting married in the morning

0:01:06 > 0:01:10# Ding dong the bells are going to chime

0:01:10 > 0:01:11# Pull out the stopper

0:01:11 > 0:01:13# Let's have a whopper

0:01:13 > 0:01:17- # But get me to the - Church on time. #

0:01:19 > 0:01:22- Morning.- Good morning.

0:01:27 > 0:01:33Aw, Mum, these are SO lush, look at the little bridesmaids' ones!

0:01:33 > 0:01:36You don't have to do anything to them, they've been treated.

0:01:36 > 0:01:39Well, I'll just put them upstairs out the way.

0:01:39 > 0:01:41Right, I'm going to jump in the shower.

0:01:41 > 0:01:44Yeah, come on, Ness, I've gotta put my veil on.

0:01:44 > 0:01:46- Yeah, me too. - You're not wearing a veil.

0:01:46 > 0:01:48What?!

0:01:50 > 0:01:52LAUGHTER

0:01:56 > 0:01:58- What you doin'?- Ey, ey, ey, ey!

0:01:58 > 0:02:02This ain't for you. You're not seeing any of this till the speech.

0:02:02 > 0:02:04About the speech, it's not too long, is it?

0:02:04 > 0:02:08If it's half as good as I know it is, it won't be long enough, they'll be calling for more.

0:02:08 > 0:02:13I did it for Gary and Simon. Absolutely rinsed themselves. I'm going to bang this in the car.

0:02:13 > 0:02:16Mate, it's going to be all right, innit?

0:02:16 > 0:02:19- What?- She's going to turn up, isn't she, after the row and that?

0:02:19 > 0:02:22Come on, get sat down. What's this?

0:02:22 > 0:02:25Pre-match nerves, eh?

0:02:25 > 0:02:27Silly sausage.

0:02:27 > 0:02:31Now look, no-one wants this marriage to fail more than I do.

0:02:31 > 0:02:36But I look at you, I look at her, you're like two peas in a bag.

0:02:36 > 0:02:39Stop your nonsense, all right?

0:02:39 > 0:02:41Here, I know what'll cheer you up.

0:02:43 > 0:02:45KNOCKING

0:02:47 > 0:02:49Pamelar! Good moaning.

0:02:49 > 0:02:52- What's all this? - Just a bag full of comedy gold.

0:02:52 > 0:02:54I'll be back in a minute, mate.

0:02:58 > 0:03:01You look lovely, Mum.

0:03:01 > 0:03:02House of Fraser.

0:03:02 > 0:03:04Hat cost more than the suit.

0:03:06 > 0:03:09Come here, sweetheart, let me do that.

0:03:13 > 0:03:18It only seems like yesterday I was putting your school tie straight!

0:03:18 > 0:03:21Thanks, Mum.

0:03:24 > 0:03:26I'll be getting through these today.

0:03:36 > 0:03:40- Oh, Gwen. You got my sling? - Yeah. It's all in here.

0:03:42 > 0:03:46- You're looking lovely, Ness, very nice.- Don't start, Bryn.

0:03:46 > 0:03:49You had your chance, you never took it.

0:03:49 > 0:03:53Come on, we gotta get going. See you down there.

0:03:58 > 0:04:01- You ready?- Yeah.

0:04:04 > 0:04:07Give us a drag of that.

0:04:10 > 0:04:12You're fine.

0:04:12 > 0:04:14SHOUTING AND CHEERING

0:04:14 > 0:04:18THEY GREET EACH OTHER NOISILY

0:04:26 > 0:04:28Yeah, yeah, yeah. Er, this is Smithy.

0:04:28 > 0:04:31Smithy, this is Jase, Stacey's brother.

0:04:31 > 0:04:34- And this is his partner, Jose. - Hello, how are you?

0:04:34 > 0:04:37- Right, have a good one! - Cheers, cheers.

0:04:39 > 0:04:43- If I was gay, I think I'd like to be like him.- Yeah, me too.

0:04:43 > 0:04:46You?!

0:04:46 > 0:04:50- Well, you'd have to lose a bit of weight.- Why?

0:04:50 > 0:04:53- Well, fat gays are like outcasts. - No, they're not!

0:04:53 > 0:04:57Dale Winton, Graham Norton, George Michael, who's not in their gang?

0:04:57 > 0:04:59- Russell Grant. - Russell Grant's not gay!

0:04:59 > 0:05:03- He is fat though. - Don't do it, Gav!

0:05:03 > 0:05:05You'll regret it for the rest of your life! Look at me!

0:05:05 > 0:05:07He regrets it! I bloody regret it!

0:05:07 > 0:05:10See what I have to put up with? It ain't worth it.

0:05:10 > 0:05:13- Stay single.- Do you know what, Pete?

0:05:13 > 0:05:15If it's so bad, why don't you just leave?

0:05:15 > 0:05:17I had me bag packed three weeks ago but it wasn't me

0:05:17 > 0:05:21on the doorstep shouting, "Come back, come back, what about the kids!"

0:05:23 > 0:05:26We'll have our work cut out with them two today!

0:05:34 > 0:05:37Now, there's something I gotta give you.

0:05:37 > 0:05:40But I won't give it to you if you don't want it.

0:05:40 > 0:05:42What? What is it?

0:05:46 > 0:05:49It's from your father it is.

0:05:49 > 0:05:53Now what it is, he wrote it three weeks before he died with

0:05:53 > 0:05:56strict instructions to give it to you on your wedding day.

0:06:02 > 0:06:04I can't.

0:06:05 > 0:06:08Do you want me to read it to you?

0:06:08 > 0:06:11"Dear Stacey..."

0:06:11 > 0:06:15You want me to do it in your father's voice? With the lisp and everything?

0:06:15 > 0:06:17Right. OK.

0:06:17 > 0:06:22"Dear Stacey, if you are reading this it must be your wedding day,

0:06:22 > 0:06:28"but if it is not and Bryn has just left it lying around, then tell him

0:06:28 > 0:06:33"he's a waste of space and could never be trusted to do anything properly.

0:06:33 > 0:06:37"When I think back to the day you were born,

0:06:37 > 0:06:41"I was the happiest man on the planet.

0:06:41 > 0:06:46"I won't lie to you, Stace, and I'm not ashamed to say it but I cried.

0:06:46 > 0:06:48"Buckets.

0:06:48 > 0:06:51"And I never imagined in a million years

0:06:51 > 0:06:56"that I wouldn't be with you on your wedding day,

0:06:56 > 0:06:59"walking you down the aisle and

0:06:59 > 0:07:01"giving you away.

0:07:01 > 0:07:06"I tell you what, whoever he is, he's the luckiest man alive!

0:07:08 > 0:07:12"I'm so sorry I'm not there for you today, Stace,

0:07:12 > 0:07:18"not in body anyway, but I'll be there in spirit.

0:07:18 > 0:07:20"And please remember,

0:07:20 > 0:07:22"that whenever you need me,

0:07:22 > 0:07:24"I'll be listening...

0:07:27 > 0:07:33"..cos you'll never stop being my beautiful baby girl.

0:07:35 > 0:07:39"Have a wonderful day, my darling.

0:07:39 > 0:07:42"I love you always. Dad."

0:07:45 > 0:07:48# If I lay here

0:07:50 > 0:07:53# If I just lay here

0:07:55 > 0:08:00# Would you lie with me and just forget the world? #

0:08:02 > 0:08:04- You all right?- Yeah.

0:08:10 > 0:08:13- You're absolutely sure about this because...- Yeah.

0:08:13 > 0:08:19# Show me a garden that's bursting into life.

0:08:25 > 0:08:28# Let's waste time

0:08:29 > 0:08:33# Chasing cars

0:08:35 > 0:08:38# Around our heads

0:08:41 > 0:08:43# If I lay here

0:08:45 > 0:08:48# If I just lay here

0:08:50 > 0:08:56# Would you lie with me and just forget the world

0:08:59 > 0:09:01# Forget what we're told

0:09:03 > 0:09:08# Before we get too old

0:09:08 > 0:09:15# Show me a garden that's bursting into life. #

0:09:15 > 0:09:17CHEERING AND MUSIC

0:09:23 > 0:09:27- Oh, my God! "Mrs Shipman"!- I know! I am!

0:09:27 > 0:09:31Well done. My beautiful "daughter-in-law"!

0:09:34 > 0:09:36Congratulations. Tidy.

0:09:36 > 0:09:38- Come here.- Oh.

0:09:38 > 0:09:41You just got married. That is disgusting.

0:09:41 > 0:09:43Are we all right to follow you, Mick?

0:09:43 > 0:09:45Yeah, yeah... hang on a minute. Smithy!

0:09:45 > 0:09:47- Michael!- You got those maps?

0:09:47 > 0:09:50- Shit!- Are you kiddin' me?- You pube!

0:09:50 > 0:09:53They're at Lucy's. She was colouring them in.

0:09:53 > 0:09:56- What's the matter?- He's forgotten the maps! How will we get there?

0:09:56 > 0:10:00- We're supposed to sit down at three! - Right, right! Not a problem.

0:10:00 > 0:10:04Two words, sat nav. Everybody, follow me!

0:10:04 > 0:10:08Fantastic. That's the spirit, Bryn-o.

0:10:08 > 0:10:10Come on, baby!

0:10:14 > 0:10:15That is cracking.

0:10:15 > 0:10:19The thing is, Griff, I feel a fool. I bought that sat nav in good faith.

0:10:19 > 0:10:24But it plainly doesn't work. That journey should be ten minutes, it took us well over an hour.

0:10:24 > 0:10:27Those hors d'oeuvres were supposed to be hot.

0:10:27 > 0:10:30Where did you get it, the sat nav?

0:10:30 > 0:10:33- Dic Powell.- Ah, well, you've only got yourself to blame.

0:10:33 > 0:10:35I know, I know, he's tricky.

0:10:35 > 0:10:37Smile!

0:10:37 > 0:10:39He gets away with it because of the language barrier.

0:10:39 > 0:10:41OK, friends of the groom.

0:10:41 > 0:10:44Friends of the groom! Friends of the groom, guys.

0:10:44 > 0:10:47And hold it!

0:10:47 > 0:10:52That is cracking. OK, now we just need one of the best man and the maid of honour.

0:10:52 > 0:10:53ALL: Wahey!

0:10:53 > 0:10:57All right, leave it out.

0:11:00 > 0:11:03Come on, you two, get a bit closer together.

0:11:03 > 0:11:05- Put your arm round her, Smithy. - No, you're all right.

0:11:05 > 0:11:08Bear with me.

0:11:11 > 0:11:13- How's it going? - OK, I'm glad you brought it up.

0:11:13 > 0:11:15I've got a girlfriend people here know.

0:11:15 > 0:11:17- I'd appreciate... - Where to's she now then?

0:11:17 > 0:11:19- What?- Where to's she now?

0:11:19 > 0:11:21Right. Either speak English or learn Welsh.

0:11:21 > 0:11:24- "Where to's she"... D'you mean where is she now?- Yeah.

0:11:24 > 0:11:26- Say that, then. - Where is she now?

0:11:26 > 0:11:28Sixth formers' netball tournament in Southend.

0:11:28 > 0:11:32- She's wing attack. - All right, guys, here we go.

0:11:32 > 0:11:33Big smiles.

0:11:36 > 0:11:37Cracking.

0:11:39 > 0:11:41Now, don't go drinking too much tonight, Stace.

0:11:41 > 0:11:44There's nothing worse than a pissed-up bride at her own wedding.

0:11:44 > 0:11:47- What's that supposed to mean? - You know what I mean.

0:11:47 > 0:11:49I was not that drunk, was I, Pammy?

0:11:49 > 0:11:51Well, no, but you'd had a few.

0:11:51 > 0:11:55Any wonder, knowing I was going to spend the rest of my life married to that!

0:11:55 > 0:11:59I could've brought the waiter in to consummate the marriage. She wouldn't have known!

0:11:59 > 0:12:02You've been a right nasty bastard today, Pete, you know?

0:12:02 > 0:12:04Mr and Mrs Shipman.

0:12:04 > 0:12:08- I mean, that's bad luck by anyone's standards.- What now?

0:12:08 > 0:12:11Well, she lives for the day she can change her name from West, what

0:12:11 > 0:12:14with all the connotations and what have you, and what does she become?

0:12:14 > 0:12:16A Shipman.

0:12:16 > 0:12:20Oh, that's very unfortunate.

0:12:20 > 0:12:23- I don't know which is worse. - Surely Shipman!

0:12:23 > 0:12:26Well, it's six of one, and half a dozen of the other.

0:12:26 > 0:12:28It was more than half a dozen, Griff! It was in the hundreds!

0:12:38 > 0:12:39Hiya, I'm Louise.

0:12:40 > 0:12:42Craig. People call me Fingers.

0:12:42 > 0:12:44What should I call you?

0:12:44 > 0:12:46Call me what you like.

0:12:52 > 0:12:53CHEERING AND CLAPPING

0:13:04 > 0:13:08- Oh, be quiet, will ya? - Oh, shut up, don't drink too much.

0:13:08 > 0:13:11I'm feeling bad enough as it is, now you...

0:13:11 > 0:13:12Shut up. Shut up!

0:13:21 > 0:13:23- Where's your boyfriend today, then?- I wouldn't let him come.

0:13:23 > 0:13:26- Why not?- He refused to go to the church service.

0:13:26 > 0:13:30I said, "You can't just turn up at the reception without seeing the actual wedding."

0:13:30 > 0:13:32And d'you know what he said?

0:13:32 > 0:13:36He said, "The only church you'll ever get me inside is Charlotte."

0:13:36 > 0:13:37THEY LAUGH

0:13:37 > 0:13:39It is out of order, though, innit?

0:13:39 > 0:13:41Unforgivable.

0:13:41 > 0:13:42Drink your drink.

0:13:51 > 0:13:54- Pam, I'm going to have to go.- What?

0:13:54 > 0:13:58It's Pete. He has been eyein' up every girl in this room.

0:13:58 > 0:14:02And young girls. I mean really young, really, really young.

0:14:02 > 0:14:04Oh, come on! He's only human.

0:14:04 > 0:14:08I catch my Mick doin' that all the time. We're all animals, Dawn.

0:14:08 > 0:14:13I know. But I just feel like I'm not enough for him any more, Pam.

0:14:13 > 0:14:15I mean, sex-wise, we're at an all-time low.

0:14:15 > 0:14:20We were in a car park in Basildon last week, flashing the headlights,

0:14:20 > 0:14:23no-one come over. I just want to be involved.

0:14:23 > 0:14:28I feel like he's looking at these girls, he's not thinking "menage," he's thinking "hello."

0:14:28 > 0:14:31Can I suggest something?

0:14:31 > 0:14:33Have you thought about role-play?

0:14:33 > 0:14:38Cos when my Trevor was alive, it did us wonders. Saved our marriage, if truth be told.

0:14:38 > 0:14:40Oh, tell me about it.

0:14:40 > 0:14:42I mean, I'm lucky, I am.

0:14:42 > 0:14:46My Mick, he's open to anything. I mean, really mucky stuff.

0:14:46 > 0:14:50Even when we do Charles and Camilla, he's first on with the ears.

0:14:50 > 0:14:52TAPPING ON GLASS

0:14:52 > 0:14:55Can I have your attention, please, ladies and gentlemen!

0:14:55 > 0:14:59Calm down, we'll get to my speech in a minute.

0:14:59 > 0:15:02First you got to listen to these borin' bastards!

0:15:02 > 0:15:03I'm only dickin' around.

0:15:03 > 0:15:08Ladies and gentlemen, give it up for my best mate, who lost his virginity

0:15:08 > 0:15:12between two wheelie bins at my mum's house in 1993... Mr Gavin Shipman!

0:15:12 > 0:15:18CHEERING

0:15:18 > 0:15:23Thanks, Smith, for that glowing character reference.

0:15:23 > 0:15:24Well, I'll keep this short.

0:15:24 > 0:15:26Like your knob!

0:15:28 > 0:15:30Sorry.

0:15:30 > 0:15:33If someone had told me three months ago that I'd be standing

0:15:33 > 0:15:36here today a married man, I'd have thought they were mad.

0:15:36 > 0:15:38Or really, really drunk.

0:15:38 > 0:15:44But nine weeks ago, I met Stacey for the first time

0:15:44 > 0:15:45and it's changed everything.

0:15:47 > 0:15:50Cos I remember people saying to me,

0:15:50 > 0:15:54"You'll know when you meet the one."

0:15:54 > 0:15:55And I'd always think "how?"

0:15:55 > 0:15:58And I just didn't believe them.

0:15:58 > 0:16:02But the minute I met you, Stacey, I did know.

0:16:02 > 0:16:06And I suddenly understood what they were on about.

0:16:06 > 0:16:10And it's something I can't even put into words, how I feel right now.

0:16:12 > 0:16:15All I can say is you're beautiful

0:16:15 > 0:16:17and you're funny

0:16:17 > 0:16:19and you're kind

0:16:19 > 0:16:26and there's just something in me that tells me I'm going to be with you and look after you forever.

0:16:28 > 0:16:29Cos I love you, baby.

0:16:31 > 0:16:34And that's just the way it is.

0:16:34 > 0:16:36Ladies and gentlemen,

0:16:36 > 0:16:43please raise a glass to my beautiful wife. Stacey.

0:16:43 > 0:16:45ALL: Stacey!

0:16:49 > 0:16:54Now, I'll hand you over to my best friend and best man, Smithy,

0:16:54 > 0:16:58who has apparently prepared a blinder of a speech...

0:16:58 > 0:17:00Smithy.

0:17:00 > 0:17:02CLAPPING AND CHEERING

0:17:13 > 0:17:15(Mate.)

0:17:22 > 0:17:24Right. Sorry.

0:17:29 > 0:17:32First of all, I'd like to raise a toast...

0:17:32 > 0:17:34All right!

0:17:41 > 0:17:43I'll never forget...

0:17:46 > 0:17:50I'll never forget when me and Gav was at the football and we was eating these hot dogs...

0:18:00 > 0:18:04Smithy, it's all right, darling. Smithy, come on.

0:18:04 > 0:18:06Gavin and Stacey, ladies and gentlemen!

0:18:06 > 0:18:09ALL: Gavin and Stacey!

0:18:15 > 0:18:16How's he doing, all right?

0:18:16 > 0:18:18He's all right. He's stopped crying.

0:18:18 > 0:18:23- It's such a shame. Cos that meal was gorgeous, and the starter... - Beautiful.

0:18:23 > 0:18:26Yeah! And I've got to be honest, I wasn't expecting it to be so good.

0:18:26 > 0:18:29But that woman, the widow, what's her name?

0:18:29 > 0:18:31- Gwen.- I mean, she's obviously spent a fortune.

0:18:31 > 0:18:34- And you can't fault that. - Well, actually...

0:18:34 > 0:18:36- What?- No...

0:18:36 > 0:18:37- Go on.- No.

0:18:37 > 0:18:39Pam?

0:18:39 > 0:18:41Well, we paid for everything.

0:18:41 > 0:18:45- I said that!- Everything except for the dress.- Oh, here we go.

0:18:45 > 0:18:47Why didn't you just announce it?

0:18:47 > 0:18:50It's only when she's getting all the credit.

0:18:50 > 0:18:52- Everyone all right?- Hey.- Hiya.- Hi.

0:18:54 > 0:18:57Testing. One, two. One, two. Testing.

0:19:07 > 0:19:10- Ever seen one of these?- What?

0:19:10 > 0:19:13No film in there. Digital.

0:19:13 > 0:19:16You're going to turn my little sister into an Essex girl, are you, Gav?

0:19:16 > 0:19:19Well, hopefully not, but yeah, we're going to live at Mum and Dad's

0:19:19 > 0:19:21for a bit, save some money, then try and get a place.

0:19:21 > 0:19:24I never thought I'd see the day when you moved out of Barry.

0:19:24 > 0:19:29- Oh, it's not going to be that bad, we'll be coming home every weekend. - What?

0:19:29 > 0:19:32No, maybe like once a month or something.

0:19:32 > 0:19:34Well, I'm coming back every weekend.

0:19:37 > 0:19:40There he is! Best man.

0:19:40 > 0:19:43Don't start, mate. I messed up, all right? Let's move on.

0:19:43 > 0:19:44- I'm having a nightmare.- What?

0:19:44 > 0:19:46Getting people to sign this wedding book.

0:19:46 > 0:19:48It's like an albatross round my neck.

0:19:48 > 0:19:52When people were eating it was fine, but now they're up and about, there's no cohesion.

0:19:52 > 0:19:55- Griff's signed it three times. - I've signed it twice.

0:19:55 > 0:19:58I've got night mode,

0:19:58 > 0:20:03black and white, use that later, probably, for effect.

0:20:03 > 0:20:05Uh, sepia, sepia, sepia?

0:20:05 > 0:20:07I don't know how you say it.

0:20:07 > 0:20:09I've got a feeling it's faulty.

0:20:09 > 0:20:11Just makes everything go brown.

0:20:17 > 0:20:22Ladies and gentlemen, please gather round. The bride and groom are now going to take their first dance.

0:20:22 > 0:20:25CHEERING

0:20:33 > 0:20:38# Put your head against my life What do you hear?

0:20:40 > 0:20:46# A million words just trying to make the love song of the year

0:20:46 > 0:20:53# Close your eyes but don't forget what you have heard

0:20:53 > 0:20:59# A man who's trying to say three words, words that make me scared.

0:20:59 > 0:21:04# A million love songs later

0:21:07 > 0:21:12# Here I am trying to tell you that I care

0:21:12 > 0:21:17# A million love songs later... #

0:21:20 > 0:21:22Uncle Bryn?

0:21:22 > 0:21:24You all right?

0:21:24 > 0:21:26Yes, thank you.

0:21:29 > 0:21:31Oh, great day, isn't it?

0:21:31 > 0:21:32Best day of my life.

0:21:35 > 0:21:37Look...

0:21:37 > 0:21:39- Can we talk about what happened? - I'd rather not.

0:21:39 > 0:21:42On the fishing trip...

0:21:42 > 0:21:45I never told anyone, y'know.

0:21:45 > 0:21:47And besides, it wasn't a big deal,

0:21:47 > 0:21:50lots of people do it. It's not against the law.

0:21:50 > 0:21:54Jason, please. How can I ever forget that look on your face?

0:21:54 > 0:21:56You gotta let it go, Uncle Bryn!

0:21:58 > 0:22:00You are a great man.

0:22:00 > 0:22:04You are. And you're a fantastic uncle.

0:22:04 > 0:22:07And you did us all proud today.

0:22:07 > 0:22:10Thank you very much.

0:22:11 > 0:22:14- You coming in?- In a bit.

0:22:25 > 0:22:30Right, we got a special treat for you now, ladies and gentlemen, from the mother of the groom.

0:22:30 > 0:22:32So big hand for...Pat!

0:22:33 > 0:22:34It's Pam, actually.

0:22:34 > 0:22:37All right, chill out, love. It's Pam.

0:22:37 > 0:22:39Go on, Pammy!

0:22:42 > 0:22:46# You're just too good to be true

0:22:46 > 0:22:49# Can't take my eyes off you

0:22:49 > 0:22:53# You feel like heaven to touch

0:22:53 > 0:22:57# I want to hold you so much

0:22:58 > 0:23:01# At long last love has arrived... #

0:23:01 > 0:23:03Hi.

0:23:03 > 0:23:08I'm Captain Mark...Overmars.

0:23:08 > 0:23:10I've just flown in on the red-eye.

0:23:10 > 0:23:13I got an eight-hour turnaround,

0:23:13 > 0:23:16I'm here for one night and one night only.

0:23:17 > 0:23:20Ooh...God.

0:23:21 > 0:23:28It must be...very...hard up there?

0:23:28 > 0:23:30All that,

0:23:30 > 0:23:32you know, pressure.

0:23:32 > 0:23:37You must really need to unwind.

0:23:37 > 0:23:41So, shall we go somewhere

0:23:41 > 0:23:43and have it off?

0:23:43 > 0:23:45No!

0:23:45 > 0:23:49Pete, he wouldn't say that.

0:23:49 > 0:23:53He'd woo me, you idiot. He'd at least buy me a ... drink.

0:23:55 > 0:23:57I'm trying my best! Dawn!!

0:24:09 > 0:24:12# I love you baby

0:24:12 > 0:24:15# And if it's quite all right I want you baby

0:24:15 > 0:24:17# To warm my lonely night

0:24:17 > 0:24:24# I love you baby Trust in me when I say

0:24:24 > 0:24:30# Oh pretty baby Don't bring me down I pray

0:24:30 > 0:24:34# Oh pretty baby Now that I've found you stay

0:24:34 > 0:24:35# Oh pretty baby... #

0:24:35 > 0:24:37Nessa?

0:24:37 > 0:24:41- What?- How comes you're not smoking? - Oh, I just put one out.

0:24:41 > 0:24:44No, you never. I haven't seen you smoking all day.

0:24:46 > 0:24:49And there's no Bacardi in there. What's going on?

0:24:49 > 0:24:51Leave it, Stace.

0:24:54 > 0:24:56- Nessa!- I said leave it.

0:25:02 > 0:25:03That was fabulous.

0:25:03 > 0:25:05Yep.

0:25:09 > 0:25:13Whoa! High five.

0:25:13 > 0:25:14Ness!

0:25:17 > 0:25:18You're pregnant, aren't you?

0:25:20 > 0:25:23- But you told me you wasn't.- I know.

0:25:23 > 0:25:26You said you went to the doctor and he said it was all clear.

0:25:28 > 0:25:31- Why didn't you tell me? - Cos I didn't want to spoil your day.

0:25:31 > 0:25:33Oh, come 'ere...

0:25:39 > 0:25:41- What you going to do?- I dunno.

0:25:41 > 0:25:43Well, you've gotta to tell Smithy.

0:25:43 > 0:25:45I just can't believe it, Stace.

0:25:45 > 0:25:49Of all the people I've slept with, it's him gets me pregnant.

0:25:49 > 0:25:53Not Nigel Havers, not John Prescott, not any of Goldie Lookin' Chain.

0:25:53 > 0:25:54No, some knob-head from Essex.

0:25:54 > 0:25:56You've still gotta tell him.

0:25:58 > 0:25:59Nessa?

0:25:59 > 0:26:01All right.

0:26:01 > 0:26:03Promise?

0:26:03 > 0:26:07Promise you'll tell him tonight? Cos you don't know when you'll see him next.

0:26:07 > 0:26:09All right.

0:26:11 > 0:26:13Come on.

0:26:13 > 0:26:15We're missing the Grease Medley.

0:26:19 > 0:26:25# Those su-u-mmer

0:26:25 > 0:26:29# Ni-ights!

0:26:29 > 0:26:37# Tell me more, tell me mo-re. #

0:26:44 > 0:26:48- You ready, babe? Car's here.- OK.

0:26:50 > 0:26:53I'll always be here for you, y'know?

0:26:53 > 0:26:55Cheers, Stace.

0:26:57 > 0:27:03Ladies and gentlemen, Kevin and Tracey are about to leave, so let's give 'em a good Welsh send off.

0:27:03 > 0:27:07# Come fly with me Let's fly, let's fly away... #

0:27:07 > 0:27:10CHEERING

0:27:10 > 0:27:17# If you can use some exotic booze there's a bar in far Bombay

0:27:17 > 0:27:23# Come fly with me Let's fly, let's fly away

0:27:24 > 0:27:30# Come fly with me Let's float down to Peru

0:27:30 > 0:27:35# In llama land there's a one-man band

0:27:35 > 0:27:38# And he'll toot his flute for you

0:27:38 > 0:27:42# Come fly with me Let's take off in the blue... #

0:27:42 > 0:27:46- We did it then. - I know. It's brilliant.

0:27:47 > 0:27:50Come here, Mrs Shipman.

0:27:53 > 0:27:59# ..We'll just glide starry-eyed

0:27:59 > 0:28:04# Once I get you up there I'll be holding you... #

0:28:06 > 0:28:07Smithy?

0:28:08 > 0:28:09Yeah?

0:28:15 > 0:28:17What?

0:28:18 > 0:28:20Don't matter.

0:28:30 > 0:28:32Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd