Episode 6

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0:00:02 > 0:00:03Are you coming with me or going with them?

0:00:03 > 0:00:06- Don't be like that.- It's OK, Gav, it's just the way it is now.

0:00:06 > 0:00:08- What is?- Us.

0:00:08 > 0:00:09This is Dave. Do you know Dave?

0:00:09 > 0:00:11I don't, no. Hello, mate. Smithy. All right?

0:00:13 > 0:00:14Who's this Dave? What's going on?

0:00:14 > 0:00:16Smithy, are you jealous?!

0:00:16 > 0:00:18No! Feel for the bloke!

0:00:20 > 0:00:21Hello, Jason.

0:00:21 > 0:00:23Well, you could have warned me!

0:00:23 > 0:00:26He's my brother, he should be here.

0:00:26 > 0:00:27I can hear them whispering.

0:00:27 > 0:00:30Four times I've heard the words "fishing trip".

0:00:30 > 0:00:32I feel like I'm all on my own.

0:00:32 > 0:00:37- What?- I'm really lonely. I don't want to live there any more.

0:00:38 > 0:00:40I'm moving back home.

0:00:43 > 0:00:45Hiya. All right?

0:00:45 > 0:00:47Yeah, how are you?

0:00:47 > 0:00:49Fine. I'm good.

0:00:49 > 0:00:52- You?- Yeah, thanks.

0:00:56 > 0:00:59- So what...?- So when do you...? - Sorry...- No, go on.

0:00:59 > 0:01:02- I just wondered what you're doing. - Well, I'm at work, aren't I?

0:01:02 > 0:01:03Oh, right. Yeah.

0:01:05 > 0:01:07Thanks for sending those clothes.

0:01:07 > 0:01:10- No worries. - I was just about to run out of pants.

0:01:16 > 0:01:19- So I'll call you later, then.- Yeah.

0:01:19 > 0:01:22- Promise?- Yeah.

0:01:24 > 0:01:27- I love you.- I love you.

0:01:37 > 0:01:41For goodness' sake, nobody will see that, there's a bloody great bush out there.

0:01:41 > 0:01:46Do you care that they are putting a phone mast just 68 feet from your back garden?

0:01:46 > 0:01:49Do you even care about the fact that we're all gonna die?

0:01:49 > 0:01:52Well, we ARE all gonna die eventually.

0:01:52 > 0:01:57Yeah, not of brain cancer and tumour brains - brain tumours - cos that's what will happen.

0:01:57 > 0:01:59I never had you down as an activist.

0:01:59 > 0:02:05Someone's got to do something, Mick. Big Fat Sue's on the case already cos her conservatory overlooks the field.

0:02:05 > 0:02:10So as soon as she sees anyone arrive, we're all gonna rush over and sit on the site in a silent protest.

0:02:10 > 0:02:13- And how's she gonna let you all know?- By text.

0:02:13 > 0:02:18But some people haven't got a good signal. They go round the back of the house to use their mobiles.

0:02:18 > 0:02:21Yeah, shame that. A lot of bad signal round here.

0:02:21 > 0:02:25We are the lucky ones cos Roy and Catherine only get reception in the bathroom! Ridiculous.

0:02:25 > 0:02:28- What's with all them signs in the window?- Oh, my little prince...

0:02:28 > 0:02:31- It's your mother's campaign. - All right?

0:02:31 > 0:02:32Are you back for lunch?

0:02:32 > 0:02:36- No, I'm meeting Smithy at the pub. I forgot my wallet.- Oh, that's nice.

0:02:36 > 0:02:37- Did you speak to Stacey today? - Yeah.

0:02:37 > 0:02:42- How is she, all right?- Yeah. Right. See you later.- Bye!- See ya.

0:02:42 > 0:02:45- I don't like seeing him like that. - I know.

0:02:45 > 0:02:49- Mick... Ring Gwen.- Pam...

0:02:49 > 0:02:51Just to check she's all right.

0:02:51 > 0:02:55- Just to check she hasn't gone cos we've pushed her out.- No, it's not.

0:02:55 > 0:02:56I want to know what's going on.

0:02:56 > 0:02:58He doesn't tell us anything!

0:03:00 > 0:03:02It's nice having you both around.

0:03:02 > 0:03:04I wish we were all under the same roof.

0:03:04 > 0:03:06Stacey's at Bryn's, you're on an airbed.

0:03:06 > 0:03:10- And there's us thinking when Dad died you'd be clattering around on your own.- No chance!

0:03:10 > 0:03:13- PHONE RINGS - See? It doesn't stop.

0:03:16 > 0:03:19- Hello?- Hi, it's Mick. Is your mum there?- Oh, God, it's Stacey!

0:03:19 > 0:03:22- Hang up! Just hang up!- Hang on!

0:03:22 > 0:03:26Jason, sorry, how are you?

0:03:26 > 0:03:27Thanks. Yeah.

0:03:29 > 0:03:30Hello, Gwen, it's Mick.

0:03:30 > 0:03:34- Hiya, Mick. How's things? - Well, we're all right, you know?

0:03:34 > 0:03:37- We're just a bit worried about the kids.- I know. How's Gavin?

0:03:37 > 0:03:40He's gone into his shell. I've never seen him like it.

0:03:40 > 0:03:42- (Has she lost any weight?)- What?

0:03:42 > 0:03:44(Has she lost any weight?)

0:03:44 > 0:03:45Has she lost weight, Stacey?

0:03:45 > 0:03:49Well, no. If anything, she's eating too much but I think that's the boredom.

0:03:49 > 0:03:51(What did she say?)

0:03:51 > 0:03:53- (What?- She's stuffing her face.)

0:03:53 > 0:03:55Hello? Mick?

0:03:55 > 0:03:56(Has she mentioned us?)

0:03:56 > 0:04:00- Yeah, yeah.- (Is Gavin coming down?)

0:04:00 > 0:04:02- What?- I didn't say anything, Gwen.

0:04:03 > 0:04:04Hang on.

0:04:07 > 0:04:10- Look, why don't you talk to her? - (No! I'm not here!)

0:04:10 > 0:04:12How's Pam bearing up? Is she all right?

0:04:12 > 0:04:14Well, she's obviously very worried.

0:04:14 > 0:04:16It's all she can think about, to tell you the truth.

0:04:16 > 0:04:18MOBILE PHONE BEEPS AND VIBRATES

0:04:18 > 0:04:20Yeah, yeah.

0:04:22 > 0:04:24Mick, get off the phone! They're here!

0:04:24 > 0:04:27- It's Sue. The bastards are here!- Hey?

0:04:27 > 0:04:28Where's my fleece? Grab that banner.

0:04:28 > 0:04:31Gwen, I'm gonna have to go, send our love to Stacey.

0:04:31 > 0:04:33Mick! Will you get OFF the PHONE?!

0:04:33 > 0:04:34OK. Goodbye. Goodbye.

0:04:34 > 0:04:38- MOBILE VIBRATES - For goodness' sake, that was really rude, Pam.

0:04:38 > 0:04:40False alarm. False alarm.

0:04:40 > 0:04:43It's just someone come to read the meter.

0:04:43 > 0:04:45LOUD ROCK MUSIC

0:04:55 > 0:04:59- All right?- £19 I've put in here. I've only been in the feature twice.

0:04:59 > 0:05:01Maybe it's time to walk away.

0:05:01 > 0:05:03Then I've really lost the money, haven't I?

0:05:03 > 0:05:06Come on, I've only got an hour and I've got to eat something.

0:05:06 > 0:05:09Hang on. I've got four nudges.

0:05:17 > 0:05:20Absolute joke. Brian, is this machine taking the piss?

0:05:20 > 0:05:22Shut up, Smithy.

0:05:22 > 0:05:24I love that guy!

0:05:24 > 0:05:27- No pretence with him. - Yeah, he's lovely.- Right.

0:05:31 > 0:05:33That's gone off.

0:05:33 > 0:05:35This is Gavlar time.

0:05:35 > 0:05:37Lay it on me.

0:05:37 > 0:05:39Well, there's nothing really to say.

0:05:39 > 0:05:42She's down there, I'm up here. It's not over, just...

0:05:42 > 0:05:44- Not a marriage any more. - She's still my wife!- On paper.

0:05:44 > 0:05:46This is really cheering me up!

0:05:46 > 0:05:52Hey, I'm no Jeremy Kyle, but I've known heartache, I know what it's like to lose the one you love.

0:05:52 > 0:05:54- I haven't lost her. - And what did I do?

0:05:54 > 0:05:58I got by with a little help from my friends. You need a night out. The boys are all in.

0:05:58 > 0:06:02- No, I just don't fancy it.- Two words. Foam. Party.- No.- Why?- Where?

0:06:02 > 0:06:04- Ritzy's.- Definitely not.- What?!

0:06:04 > 0:06:06But you used to love the foam!

0:06:06 > 0:06:10We even drove to Visage once, which is over an hour away, just cos you loved the foam so much!

0:06:10 > 0:06:13That was eight years ago! Why do you still like it?

0:06:13 > 0:06:17- You know why.- So you can touch up girls and they don't know who it is?- Exactly.

0:06:17 > 0:06:21- Yes, please. - Can I just get the fish and chips?

0:06:21 > 0:06:24I'll have a tuna baguette, with onion rings instead of fries.

0:06:24 > 0:06:27- OK.- Hang on a minute, whoa.

0:06:28 > 0:06:32- Yours comes with onion rings anyway, so give his chips to me.- What?

0:06:32 > 0:06:35Put his chips on my plate, and just leave him with the onion rings.

0:06:35 > 0:06:38So you want fish and chips, and chips?

0:06:38 > 0:06:41Yeah. But two actual portions.

0:06:41 > 0:06:44Don't just put a couple of chips on the top cos I'll know.

0:06:44 > 0:06:47- I want two full portions. - Right.- Look, it's simple, right?

0:06:47 > 0:06:54Basically plate it up as you would, with a baguette, the onion rings, the chips, right?

0:06:54 > 0:06:59And then JUST before you come out, put his chips on my plate, got it?

0:06:59 > 0:07:01- Yeah.- Great.

0:07:03 > 0:07:09- What?- Sometimes I think if we met now, we would never be friends.

0:07:12 > 0:07:14TELEVISION IS ON

0:07:14 > 0:07:17- DOOR BANGS - Ah. Good morning!

0:07:17 > 0:07:19Or should I say good afternoon?

0:07:19 > 0:07:23- Hiya!- I didn't want to wake you this morning.

0:07:23 > 0:07:26You looked very peaceful. Did you sleep all right?

0:07:26 > 0:07:29- Yeah, it was fine.- It's just every night since you've been staying,

0:07:29 > 0:07:33I go up to my bed wracked with guilt that you're down here on that!

0:07:33 > 0:07:37It's fine. Honest. I got the telly, it's quite comfy really.

0:07:37 > 0:07:39You know where the bed is if you want to swap.

0:07:39 > 0:07:46Now I'm not being funny, and it is no odds to me, but are you at any point today planning to get dressed?

0:07:46 > 0:07:48Oh, you're just as bad as Pam, you are.

0:07:48 > 0:07:50Hey, hey, hey! I'm only asking!

0:07:50 > 0:07:54I mean, as far as I'm concerned you can stay there as long as you like.

0:07:54 > 0:07:59I just think it might do you good to have a little wash, that's all.

0:07:59 > 0:08:02Clean body, clean mind, as my drama teacher used to say.

0:08:02 > 0:08:04I'm sorry.

0:08:04 > 0:08:05I will get up now.

0:08:14 > 0:08:16How are you doing really? On the inside.

0:08:16 > 0:08:18- I'm fine.- Deep down.

0:08:18 > 0:08:19- I'm fine.- In here.

0:08:19 > 0:08:22- I'm OK. Really, I am. - Are you missing him?

0:08:22 > 0:08:25Cos I know that I am.

0:08:25 > 0:08:26Every single day.

0:08:26 > 0:08:29I don't want to talk about it, to be honest.

0:08:29 > 0:08:34Right, you need something to occupy your mind.

0:08:34 > 0:08:40Now, have you been online yet today? Cos there's a cracking new website.

0:08:40 > 0:08:43It's called the You...Tube.

0:08:43 > 0:08:46And you can watch all manner of thing on there, some of it quite cheeky.

0:08:46 > 0:08:52The other night, for example, I watched three episodes of Desperate Housewives,

0:08:52 > 0:08:53season one, back-to-back!

0:08:53 > 0:08:55I've got the box set, of course I have,

0:08:55 > 0:08:59but I dunno, I think there's something magical about watching it live.

0:08:59 > 0:09:02Now, have you seen your mother today?

0:09:02 > 0:09:05She called by with Jase. They're going to see Nessa in work.

0:09:05 > 0:09:08- Is that the arcade? - No, in town. She's performing today.

0:09:17 > 0:09:18Tidy.

0:09:20 > 0:09:21Hiya, Ness.

0:09:21 > 0:09:23- All right, Gwen? Jase?- Good, thanks.

0:09:23 > 0:09:25How long have you been here?

0:09:25 > 0:09:27What time is it?

0:09:27 > 0:09:31- 20 past one. - Three hours and 20 minutes. - Well, are you stopping for lunch?

0:09:31 > 0:09:37Oh, Gwen, I'm not being funny, but stick some money in the hat and I can talk to you proper then, like.

0:09:37 > 0:09:38Yes! Of course.

0:09:53 > 0:09:54Shake it.

0:09:55 > 0:09:56Cracking.

0:09:56 > 0:09:58So, what's occurring?

0:10:00 > 0:10:01Oh! I'm on a break, all right?!

0:10:01 > 0:10:03Don't take the piss!

0:10:05 > 0:10:08Jase, when you back on the road?

0:10:08 > 0:10:12Couple of days. It's been great being home, though. I missed the place.

0:10:12 > 0:10:15I know, it does that to you, Barry does. Gets under your skin.

0:10:15 > 0:10:18No matter how far away you go, it'll always pull you back.

0:10:18 > 0:10:19Look at Stace.

0:10:19 > 0:10:23- How's she doing?- She's not too good.

0:10:23 > 0:10:26She don't want to talk about it, or anything else!

0:10:26 > 0:10:28We're going to the bingo tonight. You coming?

0:10:28 > 0:10:32- Can I bring Dave?- Yeah.- You two are quite an item now, aren't you?

0:10:32 > 0:10:36We're enjoying each other's company, Gwen, I'm not gonna lie to you.

0:10:36 > 0:10:38He's a genuine bloke. Simple as.

0:10:38 > 0:10:39And while I remember...

0:10:42 > 0:10:43..happy belated birthday.

0:10:43 > 0:10:46Just a little something from the both of us.

0:10:46 > 0:10:48- Oh, thanks, Ness!- No worries.

0:10:48 > 0:10:52I owed it you anyway for that Chinese, so it's not really a present.

0:10:52 > 0:10:54But times are hard with a baby on the way.

0:10:54 > 0:10:57- Well, it's the thought that counts. - I know.

0:10:57 > 0:10:59OK, well, we'll see you later.

0:10:59 > 0:11:02- Unless you fancy joining us for lunch?- Munchies.- My treat.

0:11:02 > 0:11:04No. I gotta get back to work.

0:11:18 > 0:11:20Right, well, we'll see you later, then.

0:11:20 > 0:11:23- Great. See you then.- Bye!

0:11:26 > 0:11:31# Imagine there's no heaven

0:11:33 > 0:11:37# It's easy if you try

0:11:39 > 0:11:43# No hell below us

0:11:46 > 0:11:51- # Above us only sky... # - Gavin! Gav! Over here!

0:11:52 > 0:11:54- What's going on? - Did you get my note?

0:11:54 > 0:11:57- Yeah, is everything all right? - Yeah! Fancy a burger?

0:11:57 > 0:11:59- A couple of minutes for onions. - Mum, I was worried!

0:11:59 > 0:12:01- Why?- Look, it's Pete's fault!

0:12:01 > 0:12:04Cos the note says, "Gavin, come to the hill now.

0:12:04 > 0:12:07"I'm with your father. Come here urgently."

0:12:07 > 0:12:10They are on their way. The mast.

0:12:10 > 0:12:14- Yeah, but I thought something had... Smithy, what are you doing here? - Gavlar!

0:12:14 > 0:12:16Pete, this burger is a dream.

0:12:16 > 0:12:18See? He's not missing the onions.

0:12:18 > 0:12:20I had a text off Big Fat Sue.

0:12:20 > 0:12:22Shh! Don't call her that!

0:12:22 > 0:12:23Her name's Su-san.

0:12:23 > 0:12:25But you always call her Big Fat Sue!

0:12:25 > 0:12:28- Not to her face. - Everything all right?

0:12:28 > 0:12:31Yes, thank you, Susan.

0:12:31 > 0:12:34- See?- Hi, Gav! Can I get you a drink?

0:12:34 > 0:12:35We're going out. What time?

0:12:35 > 0:12:40- Have one, go back to yours, get changed, go out.- OK, I'll have a beer, thanks.- Yeah?

0:12:40 > 0:12:45- Sue? Big Fat Sue? Can we get Gavin a beer?- Dawn! Don't call her that!

0:12:45 > 0:12:47Why? Everyone else does. She loves it.

0:12:47 > 0:12:49I always call her Susan.

0:12:49 > 0:12:52Yeah, but it's like we call Japanese Margaret "Japanese Margaret".

0:12:52 > 0:12:55That's because there's two Margarets, we do it to differentiate.

0:12:55 > 0:12:57- All right, son?- Yeah.

0:12:57 > 0:13:00I thought this was meant to be a silent protest.

0:13:00 > 0:13:03I've been through it all with your mother, but if you can't beat 'em...

0:13:04 > 0:13:08Every single one of them sausages has gone. Did you try one, Gav?

0:13:08 > 0:13:12- I didn't.- Will you stop going on about those bloody sausages? Yes, they're organic.

0:13:12 > 0:13:14Yes, the butcher made them with his own hands.

0:13:14 > 0:13:18And yes, you can really taste the tarragon, but could you be any more boring?

0:13:18 > 0:13:21Why do you always get like this after a couple of drinks?

0:13:21 > 0:13:24- Dawn, they were a triumph! - You're an embarrassment!- Me?!

0:13:24 > 0:13:27I'm an embarrassment? Take a look in the mirror, you pre-op!

0:13:27 > 0:13:29- Dawn, there's no need for that! - Come on!

0:13:29 > 0:13:31Mum, aren't these the guys?

0:13:31 > 0:13:35- Right. Positions, everyone! - Shh! Come on! Shh!

0:13:49 > 0:13:51- What you wearing tonight?- Shhh!

0:14:06 > 0:14:08- That it?!- It's just a sign, Mum.

0:14:08 > 0:14:09All this for a sign?

0:14:09 > 0:14:12- Right!- Bloody hell, Pam!

0:14:21 > 0:14:25Well, that showed them, Pam! Up the revolution!

0:14:34 > 0:14:35Mmm.

0:14:35 > 0:14:38I never get tired of these omelettes, Gwen.

0:14:38 > 0:14:41Good, cos sometimes I feel like it's the only thing I ever cook!

0:14:41 > 0:14:43Mum? Have you seen my...phone?

0:14:46 > 0:14:47Uncle Bryn.

0:14:49 > 0:14:50Jason.

0:14:50 > 0:14:55- By the telly, love. That's a nice shirt.- Thanks.

0:14:55 > 0:14:56Is it Rocha. John Rocha?

0:14:56 > 0:14:58Yes.

0:15:00 > 0:15:02Are you sure you don't want anything?

0:15:02 > 0:15:04No, I'll get something down there.

0:15:04 > 0:15:06Right, well, I'd better get changed.

0:15:07 > 0:15:10- Girls?!- Yeah?- Dave will be here in a minute!- Oh, whoa!

0:15:10 > 0:15:14Dave? Dave? No-one mentioned Dave was coming.

0:15:14 > 0:15:16Yeah. He's giving us a lift.

0:15:18 > 0:15:21- Ohhh.- What's the matter?

0:15:21 > 0:15:23You're letting him in, Gwen.

0:15:23 > 0:15:24Getting his feet under the table.

0:15:24 > 0:15:29Oh, Bryn. Do you know, sometimes I cannot work you out!

0:15:34 > 0:15:37Jason, I need to talk to you.

0:15:37 > 0:15:39- What's wrong?- Oh, God.

0:15:39 > 0:15:42- Uncle Bryn?- It's about Dave.

0:15:42 > 0:15:46- Nessa's Dave? Dave Coaches?- Yes. - What?- He knows.

0:15:46 > 0:15:50- What?- He knows everything.- How?

0:15:50 > 0:15:53- I told him.- Bryn!

0:15:53 > 0:15:54- I'm sorry.- Why?

0:15:56 > 0:15:58I was on the island.

0:15:58 > 0:16:00Alone.

0:16:00 > 0:16:02I was playing crazy golf.

0:16:02 > 0:16:06It was raining. I only stayed out there cos the rain covered my tears.

0:16:06 > 0:16:07When was this?

0:16:08 > 0:16:10Six months...after....

0:16:10 > 0:16:14I'd just finished the last hole, the one with the bridge and the little windmill.

0:16:14 > 0:16:15I was heading back to the kiosk.

0:16:15 > 0:16:18Dave worked there then. He could see I was upset.

0:16:18 > 0:16:21- All he did was ask me what was wrong and I told him!- For God's sake.

0:16:21 > 0:16:23Boy, did I tell him, everything.

0:16:23 > 0:16:25- What? Even about...- Yes! Everything!

0:16:25 > 0:16:31And now he's back in our lives, sitting in our house, eating our food,

0:16:31 > 0:16:36drinking our squash, taking us the bingo in his bus, and I am freaking out!

0:16:36 > 0:16:39I can't take it any more! I feel SICK!

0:16:39 > 0:16:42Bryn! Pull yourself together, man!

0:16:42 > 0:16:44Now, listen.

0:16:45 > 0:16:47Do you think he's told Ness?

0:16:47 > 0:16:53- No.- Anyone?- No.- Are you sure?- Yes. He was sickened by the whole thing.

0:16:53 > 0:16:57Right. Well, I tell you what we're gonna do.

0:16:57 > 0:16:58We're gonna do nothing.

0:16:59 > 0:17:03- Cos what happened out there was perfectly legal in this country.- Yes.

0:17:05 > 0:17:10We're gonna have to hope and pray that Dave is as good as his word and keeps it to himself.

0:17:10 > 0:17:12CAR HORN

0:17:12 > 0:17:14Right.

0:17:14 > 0:17:15Come on.

0:17:15 > 0:17:17It'll be fine.

0:17:20 > 0:17:21Jason?

0:17:22 > 0:17:24Do you ever think about it?

0:17:38 > 0:17:40- Hey, gorgeous.- Dave.

0:17:49 > 0:17:51Did you miss me?

0:17:51 > 0:17:54- Always.- Good boy.

0:17:57 > 0:17:59- All right, Gwen?- Hiya, Dave.

0:17:59 > 0:18:01Stace, you're looking nice. How's it going?

0:18:01 > 0:18:04- Oh, you know.- Hi, Jason, all right?

0:18:04 > 0:18:05Yeah, good, thanks.

0:18:07 > 0:18:09Bryn! What a treat!

0:18:09 > 0:18:14I didn't expect to see you, well, both of you, like, together, on the same trip, like.

0:18:14 > 0:18:17- Everything patched up then, is it? - Yeah, yeah, everything's fine.

0:18:17 > 0:18:19Right, welcome to Dave's Coaches.

0:18:19 > 0:18:24Dave's the name, bingo's the game, so sit back, everybody, and enjoy the ride.

0:18:24 > 0:18:25Eh, Ness?

0:18:27 > 0:18:29What's Gavin up to tonight?

0:18:29 > 0:18:34I dunno. I think he's going out with Smithy and the boys.

0:18:34 > 0:18:35Oh, there we are, then.

0:18:46 > 0:18:49Whey-hey!

0:18:52 > 0:18:54But wait! Wait! Wait!

0:18:57 > 0:18:59Wait, wait, what's it say?

0:18:59 > 0:19:02- "Back from the dead"?- Yeah.

0:19:02 > 0:19:04- Was this your idea?- Yes!

0:19:05 > 0:19:08- Well, it's not very funny. - It's just a joke.

0:19:08 > 0:19:11What, so my marriage is a joke now, is it?

0:19:11 > 0:19:14Oh, don't... It's just a bit of fun!

0:19:14 > 0:19:15Well, it's not funny.

0:19:15 > 0:19:17Deano, you weren't even at the stag!

0:19:17 > 0:19:20- I know.- Where'd you get the T-shirt?

0:19:20 > 0:19:24- I got it made.- Right, well, take them off, all of them.- What?!

0:19:24 > 0:19:26Seriously, it's not funny. Take them off.

0:19:27 > 0:19:30Told you, Smithy.

0:19:33 > 0:19:34Sorry, Gav.

0:19:39 > 0:19:41Someone order a Chinese?

0:19:41 > 0:19:43Not now, Alan.

0:19:43 > 0:19:44Take the T-shirt off.

0:19:44 > 0:19:47- But I haven't got anything else to wear.- Take it off!

0:20:00 > 0:20:02Do you know, I've not been here for years.

0:20:02 > 0:20:05- I love a bit of bingo, me. - Do they play bingo in Spain?

0:20:05 > 0:20:09- I think so. They've got a version of it, I don't know what it's called. - Bingo.

0:20:09 > 0:20:11Yeah, but what I'm saying is...

0:20:11 > 0:20:15No. It's called "bingo". The Spanish as a nation really enjoy it.

0:20:15 > 0:20:20With theirs, the numbers are pushed through the card rather than crossed off with a pen.

0:20:20 > 0:20:23Other than that, it's exactly the same. Right, Stace?

0:20:23 > 0:20:25- Yeah, we cross them.- They push them through!- All right here?

0:20:25 > 0:20:28Yeah, it's as good a place as any to set up camp.

0:20:30 > 0:20:33I mean, base. I wasn't, you know...

0:20:36 > 0:20:38All right, Bryn?

0:20:38 > 0:20:39All right there, Dai?

0:20:39 > 0:20:43- Out with the family tonight, is it? - Well, and Dave. Do you know David?

0:20:43 > 0:20:45Oh, he's part of the family now, Bryn, come on!

0:20:45 > 0:20:47Actually, he's not, Gwen.

0:20:47 > 0:20:49All right, Dai? How's it going?

0:20:49 > 0:20:51Dave. Dave Coaches Dave!

0:20:51 > 0:20:53I don't know you, but you know my wife, Maria. From the clinic.

0:20:53 > 0:20:56I'd send her your love, but we all know where that gets you.

0:20:57 > 0:20:59Let's get this show on the road.

0:21:00 > 0:21:03I mean, technically, Nessa's not family either.

0:21:03 > 0:21:05But I'm happy to let that one go.

0:21:05 > 0:21:11- What is the matter with you tonight, Bryn?- It's yours and mine, 69.

0:21:20 > 0:21:25So the ball comes in, shook him off, brought it down, and twat, right in the stanchion.

0:21:25 > 0:21:27- I wish I'd been there. - Where was ya?

0:21:27 > 0:21:30I was on the phone to Stacey for about three hours, wasn't I?

0:21:30 > 0:21:33- Oh, mate. What's the latest? - Hey! You told him about your goal?

0:21:33 > 0:21:36- Sounds incredible. - Unbelievable, Gav.

0:21:36 > 0:21:38He's chested it down, shook him off, rifled it, and bang!

0:21:38 > 0:21:42- Right in the stanchion. - Have you seen Chinese?- What?

0:21:42 > 0:21:44He didn't have another shirt.

0:21:44 > 0:21:46Or a coat. So he's wearing a bin bag.

0:21:46 > 0:21:50- It's the funniest thing I've ever seen in my life!- Really?- Yeah.

0:21:50 > 0:21:56The bouncer's saying it's not proper clothing, and he's saying it is, and he's standing out there

0:21:56 > 0:22:01wearing a bin bag! People are walking past, just looking at him wearing a bin bag!

0:22:01 > 0:22:04Someone said, "Chinese, you're wearing a bin bag!"

0:22:04 > 0:22:07Funniest thing I've ever seen in my life!

0:22:10 > 0:22:12Have you told him about your goal?

0:22:12 > 0:22:17DJ: Only half an hour to go before we unleash the foam!

0:22:35 > 0:22:38Danny La Rue, 62.

0:22:38 > 0:22:42Red raw, 64.

0:22:42 > 0:22:46Down on your knees, 43.

0:22:46 > 0:22:50Two and five, 25.

0:22:50 > 0:22:52Cheers.

0:22:52 > 0:22:56Oh, Stace, I'm not being funny but that's the fifth time in the last 20 minutes.

0:22:56 > 0:22:58- What?- Checking your phone.

0:22:58 > 0:23:01Talk to him, or don't talk to him. Cut the dicking around, you're married.

0:23:01 > 0:23:04I just don't know if I CAN ring him!

0:23:04 > 0:23:07Like, am I allowed? Does he want to talk to me?

0:23:07 > 0:23:10- I just feel so separate.- That's what happens when you separate.

0:23:10 > 0:23:14It's like I got this lovely man, we live in a lovely house, with a lovely family.

0:23:14 > 0:23:18- If that doesn't make me happy, what will?- You haven't got your own car.- Mmm.

0:23:18 > 0:23:21This reminds me very much of my time with John.

0:23:21 > 0:23:23Prescott.

0:23:23 > 0:23:27I had the lot. Flat in Westminster, full use of one of the Jags,

0:23:27 > 0:23:31didn't even have to cook, had a little Filipino do it for us.

0:23:31 > 0:23:32And a crackin' social life.

0:23:32 > 0:23:36Many a night we'd have Dave Blunkett and his bitch round for dinner.

0:23:36 > 0:23:40But I remember so clearly thinking this was not the life for me.

0:23:40 > 0:23:44And I turned to them and I said, "I don't see the point."

0:23:44 > 0:23:46Dave said neither did he.

0:23:46 > 0:23:48He could be very dry.

0:23:48 > 0:23:51I left that night and I never looked back,

0:23:51 > 0:23:53cos I knew I'd only ever be happy in Barry.

0:23:53 > 0:23:55How did John take it?

0:23:55 > 0:23:57He took it bad.

0:23:57 > 0:24:01He went mad, he did, shouting and fighting.

0:24:01 > 0:24:03Next day he punched a civilian.

0:24:03 > 0:24:06When I saw it on the telly I knew that punch was meant for me.

0:24:06 > 0:24:10I just miss him so much.

0:24:10 > 0:24:11I just miss her so much.

0:24:11 > 0:24:14- Is there no way you could just go and live down there?- Dunno.

0:24:14 > 0:24:16What would I do for work?

0:24:16 > 0:24:18- Mining?- I'd never move to Wales.

0:24:18 > 0:24:20- Why?- I don't like the accent.

0:24:20 > 0:24:27- Budgie, I was just saying to Smithy, and he said the same back, I can't wait for the foam.- Yeah?

0:24:27 > 0:24:29The foam's coming, the foam's coming!

0:24:29 > 0:24:31- Smithy, I can't wait!- Nor can I!

0:24:31 > 0:24:33DJ: It's countdown!

0:24:33 > 0:24:37Ten, nine, eight,

0:24:37 > 0:24:40seven, six, five, four,

0:24:40 > 0:24:42three, two, one...

0:24:42 > 0:24:44CHEERING

0:24:51 > 0:24:57# You could be happy and I won't know

0:24:59 > 0:25:06# But you weren't happy the day I watched you go

0:25:08 > 0:25:14# And all the things that I wish I had not said

0:25:16 > 0:25:23# Are played in lips till it's madness in my head

0:25:25 > 0:25:32# Is it too late to remind you how we were?

0:25:34 > 0:25:40# But not our last days of silence, screaming, blur

0:25:42 > 0:25:49# Most of what I remember makes me sure

0:25:51 > 0:25:58# I should have stopped you from walking out the door

0:26:00 > 0:26:06# You could be happy, I hope you are

0:26:08 > 0:26:15# You've made me happier than I've been by far

0:26:17 > 0:26:22# Somehow everything I own smells of you... #

0:26:26 > 0:26:28- MOBILE RINGS Gav?- Stace? Hello?

0:26:28 > 0:26:32- Gav? Gav, I can't hear you! - Stacey?- Wait there!

0:26:34 > 0:26:37- Stace?- Can you hear me?

0:26:37 > 0:26:41- Stace, I miss you so much!- Me, too!

0:26:41 > 0:26:43This is ridiculous!

0:26:43 > 0:26:44I know, I've gotta see you.

0:26:44 > 0:26:46- I hate this!- When can I see you?

0:26:46 > 0:26:49I dunno. Whenever you like!

0:26:49 > 0:26:51I love you, Stacey.

0:26:51 > 0:26:55I love you, baby. We're gonna be all right, aren't we?

0:26:55 > 0:26:57Of course we are!

0:26:57 > 0:26:59Of course we are!

0:26:59 > 0:27:05# Tell me tomorrow I'll wait by the window for you

0:27:10 > 0:27:14# I'll wait by the big house for you

0:27:18 > 0:27:23# I'll wait by the squeeze box for you... #

0:27:23 > 0:27:25Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd

0:27:25 > 0:27:27E-mail subtitling@bbc.co.uk