0:00:02 > 0:00:04We have to have sex twice a day. It's the only way I'll get pregnant.
0:00:04 > 0:00:09- Right, take care of my little boy now.- Course I will - his dad's my best mate.
0:00:10 > 0:00:13Oh, come here, you two. I've missed you!
0:00:13 > 0:00:14Oh, nice to see you!
0:00:14 > 0:00:17- THEY CHANT:- Gav! Gav! Gav! - Go on, Gavin! Go on, Gavin!
0:00:18 > 0:00:20Let's do some shots!
0:00:20 > 0:00:23Shots! CHEERING
0:00:27 > 0:00:29You all right?
0:00:31 > 0:00:32Mornin'.
0:00:39 > 0:00:42PHONE RINGS
0:00:43 > 0:00:44Hiya.
0:00:44 > 0:00:47Gav, where have you been? I've been trying you for ages.
0:00:47 > 0:00:49Sorry, I had a meeting with Owain about...
0:00:50 > 0:00:52Actually, I've got no idea what it was about.
0:00:52 > 0:00:54Hang on a sec. I'm just getting on the bus. Hiya.
0:00:54 > 0:00:57- You're going in early. - I know. Marco rang.
0:00:57 > 0:00:59He wants me to open up. He's goin' the dentist.
0:00:59 > 0:01:03I'm quite excited, I am. It's my first time opening up on my own.
0:01:03 > 0:01:04Anyway, shut up a minute.
0:01:04 > 0:01:06- 'I've got something to tell you.' - What?
0:01:06 > 0:01:09I think I might be pregnant.
0:01:14 > 0:01:16Oh, my God. Seriously?
0:01:16 > 0:01:18Yeah, cos when I woke up this morning,
0:01:18 > 0:01:20I felt really sick and I've got sore boobs.
0:01:20 > 0:01:22- So, what does that...? - They're all signs, Gav.
0:01:22 > 0:01:25- They're things that happen. - But have you done a test?
0:01:25 > 0:01:28No, I want to do it with you. I want you to be there.
0:01:28 > 0:01:30- Oh, my God. I can't believe it. - I know.
0:01:30 > 0:01:31- PHONE RINGS - Hang on a minute.
0:01:31 > 0:01:33Might have to take this.
0:01:33 > 0:01:34Gavin Shipman?
0:01:34 > 0:01:37Nessa's just text me. I've just had a text from Nessa.
0:01:37 > 0:01:39She's text me. She's just sent a text. Nessa's just text me.
0:01:39 > 0:01:42Can I call you back. I'm on the phone to Stacey.
0:01:42 > 0:01:44- Did you not hear what I just said? - Yeah, Nessa sent you a text.
0:01:44 > 0:01:46I don't really see what the problem is.
0:01:46 > 0:01:48There's been no contact, nothing.
0:01:48 > 0:01:51This is the first contact. She never texts.
0:01:51 > 0:01:53There's been no contact since...
0:01:53 > 0:01:54that.
0:01:54 > 0:01:56'So, what do I do?'
0:01:56 > 0:01:58But surely you talk to her about the baby, Neil.
0:01:58 > 0:02:00No. I've been talking to Bryn and Gwen when they've got the baby.
0:02:00 > 0:02:02I spoke to Dave twice. That was a barrel of laughs.
0:02:02 > 0:02:05Right. Just calm down. Where are you?
0:02:05 > 0:02:06Outside your old man's house, aren't I?
0:02:06 > 0:02:08Having a look at this extension with Deano.
0:02:08 > 0:02:09Hang on a minute. Babe?
0:02:09 > 0:02:11- What's going on? - 'It's Smithy.'
0:02:11 > 0:02:13- He's had a text from Nessa. - Oh, my God. Serious?
0:02:13 > 0:02:15Nessa never texts.
0:02:15 > 0:02:18- I didn't know she could write. - Right. Did you just tell Stacey?
0:02:18 > 0:02:19- Yes. - Are you a dick?
0:02:19 > 0:02:22Gav, Nessa's on the other line. I'll call you back.
0:02:22 > 0:02:23OK, just don't tell her that...
0:02:23 > 0:02:24Oh, God.
0:02:24 > 0:02:27- Ness? - All right, Stace?
0:02:27 > 0:02:29I got you on the Bluetooth. Power walking, I am.
0:02:29 > 0:02:32Just tryin' to shift a few pounds for the weddin', like.
0:02:32 > 0:02:35- Ness, did you text Smithy? - Yeah, I did, as it goes.
0:02:35 > 0:02:36Why?
0:02:36 > 0:02:38Well, I've not spoken to him since Essex.
0:02:38 > 0:02:40I know he's comin' down this weekend, like, with the boys.
0:02:40 > 0:02:42I just don't want it to be awkward.
0:02:42 > 0:02:44I'm meant to come down with the boys this weekend.
0:02:44 > 0:02:45All she's done is make things awkward.
0:02:45 > 0:02:47- Why? What did she say? - I'll tell you what she said.
0:02:47 > 0:02:51I've got it here. Ha! You won't believe this.
0:02:52 > 0:02:55"Hope you're OK."
0:02:57 > 0:02:59Well, what's wrong with that?!
0:02:59 > 0:03:00What does that mean?
0:03:00 > 0:03:03That could mean so many things. What's she trying to say?
0:03:03 > 0:03:05I just meant, "I hope things are OK." That's all.
0:03:05 > 0:03:07What - since you had sex?
0:03:07 > 0:03:09I told you, Stacey - I can't be sure if we did.
0:03:09 > 0:03:12It was your choice to sleep with her. You could have said no.
0:03:12 > 0:03:13I don't know if I slept with her, do I?
0:03:13 > 0:03:16I mean, I know we fell asleep together.
0:03:16 > 0:03:18I mean, I know we opened the oven door,
0:03:18 > 0:03:20but whether we actually baked the potatoes, I don't know.
0:03:20 > 0:03:23What were you wearing when you woke? That's usually a clue.
0:03:23 > 0:03:26He was completely naked. I was in my Aston Villa strip.
0:03:26 > 0:03:28- Aston Villa? - Yeah, I know.
0:03:28 > 0:03:29Aston Villa?
0:03:29 > 0:03:31Look, Stace, I gotta go.
0:03:31 > 0:03:33I've reached a steep incline.
0:03:33 > 0:03:36Your dad's calling me on the other line. Ring me on your lunch, OK?
0:03:36 > 0:03:38You are still coming down?
0:03:38 > 0:03:40- I dunno. - 'Oh, please.'
0:03:40 > 0:03:42Bryn's really excited. We all are.
0:03:42 > 0:03:45- Well, I'm really excited, Gwen. - We all are.
0:03:45 > 0:03:46I know.
0:03:46 > 0:03:49But this is the first time Gavin's friends are gonna get to see
0:03:49 > 0:03:51what I call "My Barry".
0:03:51 > 0:03:53I'm gonna take 'em down the front.
0:03:53 > 0:03:55We're gonna get some doughnuts, some candy floss.
0:03:55 > 0:03:56Bryn, I don't think they'll have time.
0:03:56 > 0:03:59They'll probably just want to go straight out in Cardiff.
0:03:59 > 0:04:02Oh, Cardiff, Schmardiff.
0:04:02 > 0:04:05What is this obsession with Cardiff and the young people?
0:04:05 > 0:04:07I mean, what has Cardiff got that Barry hasn't?
0:04:07 > 0:04:10I just think there's a bit more going on, Bryn.
0:04:10 > 0:04:13Oh. Well you say that. But come and have a look at what I've done.
0:04:19 > 0:04:21Wowee!
0:04:21 > 0:04:22I know.
0:04:22 > 0:04:24Beers. That's some football players.
0:04:24 > 0:04:27Trevor's old Subbuteo, God rest his soul.
0:04:27 > 0:04:28Oh, yes!
0:04:28 > 0:04:30I just wanted them to feel at home,
0:04:30 > 0:04:34so they didn't have to go out if they didn't want to.
0:04:34 > 0:04:36And look at this. I probably shouldn't show you this.
0:04:36 > 0:04:39It's just me being silly. Don't read anything into it.
0:04:39 > 0:04:41Other than... LAUGHING
0:04:41 > 0:04:44It's just something for them.
0:04:45 > 0:04:46To look at.
0:04:49 > 0:04:51So, how many have you got altogether now?
0:04:51 > 0:04:52Right. I've got...
0:04:54 > 0:04:56Tonight, Matthew, staying in my house,
0:04:56 > 0:05:01Fingers, Dirtbox, Dean, Budgie, Swede, Gary - not Simon...
0:05:01 > 0:05:03Chinese Alan.
0:05:03 > 0:05:06And if Smithy doesn't want the sofa at yours,
0:05:06 > 0:05:08he's more than welcome to top and tail with me.
0:05:08 > 0:05:10He's got the option.
0:05:10 > 0:05:12Oh, I feel bad, you having them all in here.
0:05:12 > 0:05:14Won't it be too much for you?
0:05:14 > 0:05:16No, but I like it, Gwen.
0:05:16 > 0:05:18I like being one of the boys, one of the gang.
0:05:18 > 0:05:21- Part of the crew. - Doris has offered as well.
0:05:21 > 0:05:24- She's got the room. - I bet she has.
0:05:24 > 0:05:25No, I'm sorry.
0:05:25 > 0:05:29I know what Doris wants and I know what she's after.
0:05:29 > 0:05:32She's not getting her hands on my boys.
0:05:45 > 0:05:48Smithy, you just put one out. You're chainin' it.
0:05:49 > 0:05:51I know. I always do.
0:05:51 > 0:05:54It helps me, you know... be creative. Don't it, Deano?
0:05:54 > 0:05:56Yeah, yeah, it does.
0:05:57 > 0:06:00And you're sure you just want a conservatory?
0:06:00 > 0:06:01Look, we've been through this.
0:06:01 > 0:06:03I know, but hear me out, right?
0:06:03 > 0:06:08So, say you're already brickin' it to here, right?
0:06:08 > 0:06:11- Why not go the whole hog? - The full Monty.
0:06:11 > 0:06:12Brick it to here.
0:06:12 > 0:06:14Windows.
0:06:14 > 0:06:17And then, instead of a glass roof, which gets dirty
0:06:17 > 0:06:19with watermarks and leaves and...
0:06:19 > 0:06:20Cats.
0:06:20 > 0:06:24Right? Have three - one, two, three -
0:06:24 > 0:06:26skylights.
0:06:26 > 0:06:28- It'd add value. - You'd need planning permission.
0:06:28 > 0:06:31No! I ain't had planning permission for any of my extensions.
0:06:31 > 0:06:32I did nine last year.
0:06:32 > 0:06:34Look, I want a conservatory.
0:06:34 > 0:06:38I want somewhere for me, where I can get away from it all -
0:06:38 > 0:06:40all the stresses and pressures of modern life.
0:06:40 > 0:06:41That's it.
0:06:41 > 0:06:42- Pamela... - Finito.
0:06:42 > 0:06:46In memoriam. The end. Now, who wants a cup of tea?
0:06:46 > 0:06:47Yeah, I'll have a quick one before I go back.
0:06:47 > 0:06:49Go on, then. Milk and five sugars.
0:06:49 > 0:06:51Dean?
0:06:51 > 0:06:52Dean?
0:06:52 > 0:06:54Dea-ean?
0:06:54 > 0:06:56- Deano. - Yep?
0:06:56 > 0:06:58Do you want a tea or a coffee?
0:06:58 > 0:07:00Uh, yeah, can I have half and half, please?
0:07:00 > 0:07:02- Sorry? - Like...
0:07:02 > 0:07:04can I have tea in the bottom half of the mug
0:07:04 > 0:07:06and then coffee in the top half of the mug, please?
0:07:06 > 0:07:08Oh, right.
0:07:08 > 0:07:10Yeah, I started drinking it about 18 months ago.
0:07:10 > 0:07:13I call it a "toffee" or a "c-ea".
0:07:13 > 0:07:14But you can't ask for that in a cafe,
0:07:14 > 0:07:16cos they just bring you a toffee...
0:07:16 > 0:07:18or a key.
0:07:18 > 0:07:21- Is it nice? - I've no idea, Mick. I like it.
0:07:21 > 0:07:24Can I just say to you, as I do to everyone,
0:07:24 > 0:07:26Deano will never be working here on his own?
0:07:26 > 0:07:29I will always be here to monitor him.
0:07:32 > 0:07:34STACEY: Thanks a lot.
0:07:34 > 0:07:37- So, how far gone are you? - Hardly anything, I think.
0:07:37 > 0:07:40- A week, ten days. - Have you done a test?
0:07:40 > 0:07:42No, I'm gonna wait for Gav.
0:07:42 > 0:07:45I can't believe I'm gonna be a mum.
0:07:45 > 0:07:46Yeah, well, don't get too excited, Stace.
0:07:46 > 0:07:48It's not all it's cracked up to be.
0:07:48 > 0:07:50I mean, don't get me wrong. I loves Neil the Baby.
0:07:50 > 0:07:54He's a good bloke. I wouldn't be without him for the world.
0:07:54 > 0:07:57But at the end of the day, he's needy. He's always after something.
0:07:57 > 0:07:59Stace, I need your help.
0:07:59 > 0:08:01- Hiya, Ness. - All right, Bryn? You comin' in?
0:08:01 > 0:08:03I won't. Not today. I've got too much on.
0:08:03 > 0:08:05- How come? - Breakfast cereals.
0:08:05 > 0:08:08The list is endless. I don't know what to get for the boys.
0:08:08 > 0:08:10I mean, in my day, it was simple.
0:08:10 > 0:08:12Weetabix or Corn Flakes. You knew where you stood.
0:08:12 > 0:08:16But now, I'm looking at a Weeto, a Cheerio,
0:08:16 > 0:08:19a Coco Pop, a Frosted Shreddie, an Oatso Simple,
0:08:19 > 0:08:23a Gillian McKeith Organic Amaranth Cereal Flake.
0:08:23 > 0:08:27And would someone please tell me what on earth is a Choco Rock?
0:08:27 > 0:08:28Oh, they're lush, they are.
0:08:28 > 0:08:30They're like chocolate and bits of rocks.
0:08:30 > 0:08:32Why don't you do 'em a fry-up?
0:08:32 > 0:08:33Well, I'm doing a fry-up. Of course I am.
0:08:33 > 0:08:35But this is the continental option.
0:08:35 > 0:08:37Oh, Bryn, don't raise your voice at me, all right?
0:08:38 > 0:08:40Sorry, Stace.
0:08:40 > 0:08:43I was just gonna say, why don't you get a variety pack?
0:08:43 > 0:08:46Well, I thought about that. I really did.
0:08:46 > 0:08:49But answer me this - who's gonna eat the Ricicles?
0:08:49 > 0:08:50- Good point. - Fair play.
0:08:50 > 0:08:52- NEIL CRIES - Right.
0:08:52 > 0:08:55I gotta get off. Dave's going Stonehenge.
0:08:55 > 0:08:57Party of 12 - pensioners.
0:08:57 > 0:08:59Who's havin' Neil, then, the baby, if we're goin' out?
0:08:59 > 0:09:01- Who do you think? - Gwen.- Mum.
0:09:01 > 0:09:03Have you asked her yet?
0:09:03 > 0:09:06No. I'm just gonna drop him round. What's she gonna do?
0:09:10 > 0:09:12SHOP BELL RINGS
0:09:12 > 0:09:14- Hiya. Sorry I'm late. - Hiya.
0:09:14 > 0:09:16Babe, there's so many - Clearblue, First Response,
0:09:16 > 0:09:19Answer One, Answer Two, True For You.
0:09:19 > 0:09:21- Let's just get the lot of them. - They're like a tenner each.
0:09:21 > 0:09:23We only need one, don't we? Let's ask the woman.
0:09:23 > 0:09:25- No! - Why?
0:09:25 > 0:09:28I know her. Natalie Lewis. She's a right bitch.
0:09:28 > 0:09:31Nessa once had a fight with her dad and her brother.
0:09:31 > 0:09:32All right, Stace?
0:09:32 > 0:09:34All right, Nat?
0:09:34 > 0:09:35How's Ness?
0:09:35 > 0:09:37Fine.
0:09:37 > 0:09:40- How's your dad? Your brother? - Dad's all right.
0:09:40 > 0:09:43Wayne's still on crutches.
0:09:54 > 0:09:56Right, so, shall we...?
0:09:56 > 0:09:57Hang on, Gav.
0:10:00 > 0:10:02SHOP BELL RINGS
0:10:02 > 0:10:06Excuse me, love. Where to's the fake tans?
0:10:06 > 0:10:07I'll show you now.
0:10:15 > 0:10:17Oh, God, I hate her.
0:10:17 > 0:10:19Come on. I'm not buying a test from her.
0:10:19 > 0:10:22- She don't work on commission. - I don't care. Let's go Superdrug.
0:10:22 > 0:10:23PHONE BEEPS Who's that?
0:10:23 > 0:10:24It's Smithy. They've arrived.
0:10:43 > 0:10:44HORN HONKS
0:10:44 > 0:10:47ALL SHOUT
0:10:58 > 0:11:00Yeah, that is lovely. Yeah. Where's your bags?
0:11:00 > 0:11:03I dunno. Where's your sheep, you dirty Welsh slag?
0:11:03 > 0:11:05- No, you slag! - No, you slag!
0:11:05 > 0:11:08ALL: You slag! You slag!
0:11:08 > 0:11:10- Hiya! - You are a slag!
0:11:10 > 0:11:12All right, Gwen?
0:11:12 > 0:11:14Um... You know everyone from the wedding.
0:11:14 > 0:11:16- I think so. Hello again. - She hasn't met Deano.
0:11:16 > 0:11:19Hello, Deano. Welcome to Barry.
0:11:19 > 0:11:24S'mae? Deano ydw i a dw i'n hapus iawn bod yma yn y Barri.
0:11:25 > 0:11:27Sorry, but I don't s...
0:11:27 > 0:11:29Gwen, wait a minute. What you doin'?
0:11:29 > 0:11:30I've been learning Welsh.
0:11:30 > 0:11:32I did an intensive course, cos I knew we were coming down.
0:11:32 > 0:11:34I wanted to understand what everyone was saying.
0:11:34 > 0:11:36- SCOFFING - You twat.
0:11:36 > 0:11:38- What? - No-one speaks Welsh.
0:11:38 > 0:11:40- No, that's not strictly... - Gwen,
0:11:40 > 0:11:42don't make it more complicated for him than it already is, OK?
0:11:42 > 0:11:44Listen, Deano? Hey?
0:11:44 > 0:11:47No-one here, or where we're going tonight,
0:11:47 > 0:11:49none of them speak Welsh.
0:11:49 > 0:11:52- But what about the signs? - I know. You just gotta ignore it.
0:11:52 > 0:11:54- I don't understand. - Deano, seriously, just forget it.
0:11:54 > 0:11:57Right, if I don't understand it, then you...you definitely won't.
0:11:57 > 0:11:59- All right? - DOOR OPENS
0:11:59 > 0:12:02- Fee, fi, fo, fum! - ALL: HEY!
0:12:02 > 0:12:05I smell the blood of several Englishmen.
0:12:05 > 0:12:08Jokin', I am. I'm not a giant. Chinese!
0:12:08 > 0:12:10- All right, Bryn. How are you? - Swede!
0:12:10 > 0:12:11All right, Bryn.
0:12:11 > 0:12:13Yeah, all right.
0:12:13 > 0:12:15Easy, Bryn.
0:12:17 > 0:12:20Oh...!
0:12:20 > 0:12:22BRYN MOANS
0:12:22 > 0:12:25- Budgie. - Hey.
0:12:25 > 0:12:28- Now, you must be Dean. - Deano.
0:12:28 > 0:12:30- Is it your first time to Wales? - Yeah.
0:12:30 > 0:12:33- Croeso i Gymru. - Bryn, don't. Pack it in.
0:12:33 > 0:12:35Right. Should we show you where you're staying?
0:12:35 > 0:12:38Right, Fingers, Dirtbox, Deano,
0:12:38 > 0:12:42Budgie, Swede, Gary - not Simon.
0:12:42 > 0:12:45No need to explain there. Chinese, Alan...
0:12:45 > 0:12:48- Oh! Chinese Alan. - HE LAUGHS
0:12:48 > 0:12:51Step forward into my new bachelor paradise.
0:12:51 > 0:12:55ALL: Hey, hey, hey!
0:12:56 > 0:12:58- All right. See you later. - See you in a bit.
0:13:00 > 0:13:01Right, listen.
0:13:01 > 0:13:04I need your help this weekend, OK? This is seriously awkward.
0:13:04 > 0:13:05- What? - This.
0:13:05 > 0:13:08Her - Nessa. All this...texting business.
0:13:08 > 0:13:10I keep readin' it and rereading it.
0:13:10 > 0:13:12Smithy, all she said was, "Hope you're OK."
0:13:12 > 0:13:13Exactly. "Hope."
0:13:13 > 0:13:16"Hope you're OK." She's saying there's hope.
0:13:16 > 0:13:17I've given her hope - false hope.
0:13:17 > 0:13:18I think she was just checking...
0:13:18 > 0:13:21Don't leave me on my own with her this weekend. Not at all, not ever.
0:13:21 > 0:13:22All right?
0:13:22 > 0:13:24Honestly, I think you're reading too much into this.
0:13:24 > 0:13:27Her and Dave are all right. They've set a wedding date.
0:13:27 > 0:13:28Have they?
0:13:28 > 0:13:30Yeah, June 13th or something.
0:13:30 > 0:13:31CAR HORN HONKS
0:13:31 > 0:13:33Sorry.
0:13:39 > 0:13:41Can I do you something before you go out?
0:13:41 > 0:13:44We'll probably eat later, so I'm all right, thanks.
0:13:44 > 0:13:46Me too. I'm not hungry. I'll just have a couple of omelettes.
0:13:46 > 0:13:49Cheese? Mushroom? Ham? Tomato?
0:13:49 > 0:13:51Yeah. Cheers.
0:13:51 > 0:13:52- STACEY: Gav? - Yeah?
0:13:52 > 0:13:54Will you come here a minute?
0:13:56 > 0:13:59Will you go back and get one now - a test?
0:13:59 > 0:14:03- Babe, it's a bit awkward now, innit? - Oh, why? I'm really excited.
0:14:03 > 0:14:06I know. Me too. But Smithy's here, the boys are over the road.
0:14:06 > 0:14:07I can't just leave 'em. Why can't YOU go?
0:14:07 > 0:14:10I've gotta get ready. I haven't done my hair or nothin'.
0:14:10 > 0:14:13- Why don't we wait till tomorrow? - But I just want to know.
0:14:13 > 0:14:15So do I. But tomorrow, everyone will have gone.
0:14:15 > 0:14:16We can do it properly, take our time.
0:14:16 > 0:14:19- On our own? - Yeah.
0:14:19 > 0:14:21All right, then.
0:14:21 > 0:14:23Can you believe it, Gav?
0:14:23 > 0:14:24There might be a little baby in there.
0:14:24 > 0:14:27I know. It's amazing.
0:14:31 > 0:14:33- NESSA:- All right, Gwen? How's it going?
0:14:33 > 0:14:35- GWEN:- Hello, Ness. Hello, lovely.
0:14:35 > 0:14:37All right, Gav?
0:14:37 > 0:14:39All right, Nessa? Hiya, Neil.
0:14:39 > 0:14:40Where to's Smithy?
0:14:40 > 0:14:42He's, um...
0:14:44 > 0:14:46He's...
0:14:46 > 0:14:48Well, he's under the table, actually.
0:14:51 > 0:14:53All right, Smithy? What's occurrin'?
0:15:01 > 0:15:02All right?
0:15:02 > 0:15:03NEIL GIGGLES
0:15:03 > 0:15:05Hello!
0:15:05 > 0:15:08Lovely boy! How are you?
0:15:08 > 0:15:09Ah!
0:15:09 > 0:15:11Oh, I've missed you!
0:15:11 > 0:15:14Mmm! Mwah!
0:15:18 > 0:15:20Actually, I might take him over Bryn's, see the boys.
0:15:20 > 0:15:22- Gav, you want to come? - Yeah, OK.
0:15:22 > 0:15:25Forget those omelettes. We're going to Bryn's, see the boys.
0:15:25 > 0:15:27Oh, that's a shame. They're done now.
0:15:27 > 0:15:29No worries. I'll take 'em off your hands.
0:15:29 > 0:15:30Will you? All right, love.
0:15:32 > 0:15:33Stace?
0:15:33 > 0:15:35- Nessa's here. - OK.
0:15:35 > 0:15:37Oh, Gwen?
0:15:37 > 0:15:39What are you doing tonight?
0:15:39 > 0:15:40Well, I've got a few options.
0:15:40 > 0:15:41Elaine wants to go to the pictures,
0:15:41 > 0:15:43but Janet fancies the bingo, so I'm not really sure.
0:15:43 > 0:15:45You may have to take a rain check on all them.
0:15:45 > 0:15:47I need you to mind Neil for me, the baby.
0:15:47 > 0:15:49- -- Oh. Really? - -- Afraid so.
0:15:49 > 0:15:51- -- Is there nobody...? - -- No.
0:15:52 > 0:15:54I'd better ring the girls, then.
0:15:54 > 0:15:55I would.
0:15:58 > 0:16:00- MAN: Shot! - That's 2-1.
0:16:00 > 0:16:02Here we go. Mini burgers.
0:16:02 > 0:16:04- BUDGIE:- Oh, Bryn, this is amazing.
0:16:04 > 0:16:07he mini hot dogs will be ready soon. Have as many as you like.
0:16:07 > 0:16:10Not very filling, but I just think they're more fun when they're mini.
0:16:10 > 0:16:13- How are we all doing down here? - Absolutely terrific, Bryn.
0:16:13 > 0:16:14DOORBELL RINGS Who could that be?
0:16:14 > 0:16:16Swede, would you, uh, get the door, please?
0:16:16 > 0:16:20I honestly think this is the best day of my life...
0:16:20 > 0:16:21so far.
0:16:21 > 0:16:23Oh, Dean, that means the world to me.
0:16:23 > 0:16:27There are some mags over there - Loaded, FHM, Zoo, what have you.
0:16:27 > 0:16:29Hey, hey! Bryn Diesel!
0:16:29 > 0:16:30Bloody hell. What's going on here?
0:16:30 > 0:16:34I know. It's exactly the effect I wanted and more.
0:16:34 > 0:16:39I feel like Fagin, and you, Gav, are my Oliver Twist,
0:16:39 > 0:16:41standing next to the Artful Dodger.
0:16:41 > 0:16:44Mate, let's have a hold.
0:16:44 > 0:16:46Hey, you want to go to your Uncle Dirtbox?
0:16:46 > 0:16:49Oh, he's incredible! Oh, he's so cute!
0:16:49 > 0:16:51And there's your Uncle Budgie. Budge, do you want a hold?
0:16:51 > 0:16:53Uh, no, I'm good, thanks. I'm playing this.
0:16:53 > 0:16:56I really like him, you know?
0:16:56 > 0:16:59Yeah, I want one.
0:16:59 > 0:17:01- Yeah, it's good, isn't it? - Yeah.
0:17:01 > 0:17:03- Deano, do you want to hold Neil? - Here you are, mate.
0:17:06 > 0:17:09- What? - Babies freak me out a bit.
0:17:09 > 0:17:11- Why? - I dunno. It's just...
0:17:11 > 0:17:15He looks like Smithy but smaller.
0:17:15 > 0:17:17Like a mini version.
0:17:17 > 0:17:19Talking of which, who'd like a mini hot dog?
0:17:19 > 0:17:20- I'd Love one. - No, thanks.
0:17:20 > 0:17:23Right. What's going on tonight? What's the plan?
0:17:23 > 0:17:25- What's happening? - This guy in work, Owain...
0:17:25 > 0:17:27- Owain Hughes? - Yeah.
0:17:27 > 0:17:31Before you ask, no, he doesn't. LAUGHING
0:17:35 > 0:17:37Right. Seriously...
0:17:37 > 0:17:38what is going on?
0:17:38 > 0:17:42OK, so, Owain said best to start off in Ten Feet Tall, but Stacey and...
0:17:42 > 0:17:43Which is irrelevant, cos this is a boys' night.
0:17:43 > 0:17:46Yeah, so I thought we'd go to Buffalo to start
0:17:46 > 0:17:47and Tiger Tiger, maybe.
0:17:47 > 0:17:50Are there ladies there? Is that where the ladies are at?
0:17:50 > 0:17:52Fingers, that's the beauty of Cardiff.
0:17:52 > 0:17:54There's girls everywhere.
0:17:54 > 0:17:57I say we go Walkabout, Tiger Tiger, Vodka Revolution.
0:17:57 > 0:18:00It's exactly like being in Essex. That's why it's so brilliant.
0:18:00 > 0:18:02Bryn, where's good to go in Cardiff?
0:18:02 > 0:18:04Oh, now, there's the question.
0:18:04 > 0:18:05Um...
0:18:05 > 0:18:08I've not been out in Cardiff since...
0:18:08 > 0:18:101978.
0:18:10 > 0:18:13I went with Dick - Dick Powell - and my brother, God rest his soul.
0:18:13 > 0:18:17We went to a place called Bumpers in the Castle Arcade.
0:18:17 > 0:18:18It's closed down now, Bumpers.
0:18:18 > 0:18:21No, it's not for me, the night-life.
0:18:21 > 0:18:23You should come out with us, Bryn. It'd be a laugh.
0:18:23 > 0:18:25Gosh, no, that's not my scene, Budgie.
0:18:25 > 0:18:29I'd much rather wait in for you young men to come home,
0:18:29 > 0:18:32all boozed up and disorientated,
0:18:32 > 0:18:34not knowing what's what or who's who.
0:18:34 > 0:18:37- DIRTBOX:- Oh, come on! Come out! - ALL SHOUT
0:18:37 > 0:18:40LAUGHING
0:18:40 > 0:18:42ALL CONTINUE SHOUTING Boys! Boys!
0:18:42 > 0:18:45There's no way you're getting me out in Cardiff tonight.
0:18:45 > 0:18:48Well, I never thought you'd get me out in Cardiff tonight.
0:18:48 > 0:18:51- BUDGIE:- Right, who wants a drink? Pint?
0:18:51 > 0:18:52Pint? Pint.
0:18:52 > 0:18:54- Me. - Pint.
0:18:54 > 0:18:55- I'll have a pint. - Pint.
0:18:55 > 0:18:56Pint. Pint.
0:18:56 > 0:18:59- Bryn? - I'll have a pint, please, Budge.
0:18:59 > 0:19:01Are you sure, Bryn? I thought you liked a Cinzano.
0:19:01 > 0:19:05Put a sock in it, Gav. I'm out with the boys. I'm having a pint!
0:19:05 > 0:19:07Get over yourself!
0:19:07 > 0:19:09ALL LAUGH
0:19:09 > 0:19:11Nice one, Bryn.
0:19:13 > 0:19:15STACEY LAUGHS
0:19:16 > 0:19:19- All right, Nev? - All right, Ness.
0:19:21 > 0:19:23- Kev. - All right.
0:19:23 > 0:19:24- Who's the new boy? - That's Dev.
0:19:24 > 0:19:26- All right, Dev? - All right.
0:19:26 > 0:19:30- Stace, Lou, Anje...Nev, Kev, Dev. - GIRLS: All right.
0:19:30 > 0:19:32- All right. - How's it goin' tonight?
0:19:32 > 0:19:34- Yeah, good. - Any trouble?
0:19:34 > 0:19:37Nah, it's early doors. You in for the duration?
0:19:37 > 0:19:40Ah, we'll be here for a bit. Any nonsense, give me a shout.
0:19:40 > 0:19:42Will do. Cheers, Ness.
0:19:42 > 0:19:44- Just the four of you, then, is it? - Yeah.
0:19:44 > 0:19:46Go on, then. In you go.
0:19:46 > 0:19:48Tidy.
0:19:56 > 0:19:58Four Cokes, please.
0:19:58 > 0:20:00Do you miss being on the doors, Ness?
0:20:00 > 0:20:01Yeah, bouncing, like.
0:20:01 > 0:20:03Sometimes.
0:20:03 > 0:20:05I miss the camaraderie, but I don't miss the rage.
0:20:05 > 0:20:06I don't miss getting home
0:20:06 > 0:20:09and soaking my knuckles in a bucket of ice.
0:20:09 > 0:20:10That's no way to live.
0:20:10 > 0:20:13Not for an attractive woman.
0:20:17 > 0:20:19Oh, not for me, thanks.
0:20:19 > 0:20:21- How comes you're not drinking? - I can't really say.
0:20:21 > 0:20:23- She thinks she may be up the duff. - Nessa!
0:20:23 > 0:20:25BOTH: Oh, my God!
0:20:25 > 0:20:27- What? - I weren't gonna say nothin'.
0:20:27 > 0:20:30Oh, come on, Stace. We both know, once you get a drink inside you...
0:20:30 > 0:20:33That's the point. I'm not gonna have a drink inside me. I'm not drinking!
0:20:33 > 0:20:35Fair point.
0:20:35 > 0:20:37You've got a point.
0:20:38 > 0:20:40She's not up the duff.
0:20:41 > 0:20:42I was lying.
0:20:44 > 0:20:46Sorry.
0:20:47 > 0:20:50MUSIC: "Remedy" by Little Boots
0:20:52 > 0:20:55# Spin me faster like a kaleidoscope
0:20:55 > 0:20:58# All I've got's the floor
0:20:58 > 0:21:00# Yeah, you can try
0:21:00 > 0:21:06# But I've found the antidote Music is the cure... #
0:21:06 > 0:21:08Do you like this kind of music?
0:21:08 > 0:21:11I can't hear a word you're saying.
0:21:11 > 0:21:13What music do you like?
0:21:13 > 0:21:14Yes!
0:21:14 > 0:21:17# ..Poison killing my emotion
0:21:17 > 0:21:19# I will not be frozen
0:21:19 > 0:21:22# Dancing is my remedy, remedy... #
0:21:25 > 0:21:26Slow down, Smithy, mate.
0:21:26 > 0:21:29- What? Why? - There's Owain.
0:21:29 > 0:21:32- Owain? - Gav! How's it goin'?
0:21:32 > 0:21:35- Yes. All right? - All right, mate. How you doin'?
0:21:35 > 0:21:36Nice to meet you.
0:21:36 > 0:21:40Hey! Owain! Owain Hughes!
0:21:40 > 0:21:43Do you want a glass of white Owain or red Owain...Hughes?
0:21:43 > 0:21:46You must be Smithy. Nice to meet you.
0:21:46 > 0:21:48Come here, you little prick!
0:21:48 > 0:21:49Sorry, mate. He's had a few.
0:21:49 > 0:21:54Hey, do you know what your favourite TV programme is?
0:21:54 > 0:21:57- Last of the Summer Owain...Hughes. - PHONE RINGS
0:21:57 > 0:21:59SMITHY LAUGHS
0:21:59 > 0:22:01Keep an eye on him a minute. It's Stacey.
0:22:01 > 0:22:02- 'Stace!' - Where are you?
0:22:02 > 0:22:05- Oceana. - Is Louise there? We lost her.
0:22:05 > 0:22:08BOTH: She couldn't get into Revs. STACEY: That girl still works there.
0:22:08 > 0:22:11- She's talking to Deano. - 'OK, I'm comin' over, all right?'
0:22:11 > 0:22:12Yeah, brilliant.
0:22:12 > 0:22:15- And I've got a surprise for you. - What? What surprise?
0:22:15 > 0:22:17You'll have to wait.
0:22:17 > 0:22:18- DEANO:- Reit,
0:22:18 > 0:22:22a ble ydych chi'n mynd ar eich gwyliau eleni, te?
0:22:22 > 0:22:25Oh, my God! You're so lush, you are.
0:22:25 > 0:22:27Yn Gymraeg, os gwelwch yn dda!
0:22:27 > 0:22:31O, ti mor lysh, ti'n gwybod! Mor, mor lysh...
0:22:31 > 0:22:33Deano's talking Welsh to Stacey's mate,
0:22:33 > 0:22:35and she's speaking it back to him. She's all over him.
0:22:35 > 0:22:37It's a beautiful language, Gav.
0:22:37 > 0:22:40And you, Owain Hughes, are a beautiful man.
0:22:40 > 0:22:43I like you. I like you a lot.
0:22:43 > 0:22:45My son's half Welsh.
0:22:45 > 0:22:46- Is he? - Yeah, his mum's Welsh.
0:22:46 > 0:22:49We're not together or anything, though. It's not like that.
0:22:49 > 0:22:51But she...she texts me.
0:22:51 > 0:22:53She sends me texts.
0:22:53 > 0:22:55Let me show you... In fact, let me show you this text.
0:22:55 > 0:22:58- See what you think. - Oh, for God's sake, Smithy...
0:22:58 > 0:23:00Shut up! Shut up!
0:23:00 > 0:23:03I am talking to Owain Hughes, who, quite frankly,
0:23:03 > 0:23:06is a better friend to me than you have ever been.
0:23:06 > 0:23:08Sorry. He always gets like this when he's drunk.
0:23:08 > 0:23:11How do you know? You don't know me!
0:23:11 > 0:23:13You don't even come out with me any more! You live here!
0:23:15 > 0:23:17Now, let me show you this.
0:23:18 > 0:23:20Oi, has anyone seen Bryn?
0:23:20 > 0:23:24What do you say? Seriously, Owain Hughes, what would you say?
0:23:29 > 0:23:31Oh, my God! Uncle Bryn!
0:23:31 > 0:23:33Stace...
0:23:33 > 0:23:37Are you OK? I feel a bit weepy, Stace.
0:23:37 > 0:23:38Have you been drinkin'?
0:23:38 > 0:23:42Yeah, a few pints and some shots.
0:23:42 > 0:23:45You've overdone it, Bryn. You don't know your limits.
0:23:45 > 0:23:46HE SOBS I don't.
0:23:51 > 0:23:53Oh, Ness!
0:23:53 > 0:23:55What have I become?
0:23:55 > 0:23:56Come on. You're fine.
0:23:58 > 0:24:00In through the nose, out through the mouth.
0:24:00 > 0:24:03BOTH INHALE
0:24:03 > 0:24:05SOBS
0:24:05 > 0:24:06- BUDGIE:- Oi!
0:24:06 > 0:24:09There you are. Are you all right?
0:24:09 > 0:24:10Is he all right?
0:24:10 > 0:24:12Yeah, he's just a bit drunk, he is.
0:24:12 > 0:24:14Oh, Budge.
0:24:14 > 0:24:17Of all the boys, I knew you'd come and look for me.
0:24:17 > 0:24:18Here you are. There's some water.
0:24:18 > 0:24:21Oh, you're so kind.
0:24:21 > 0:24:25You're kind and lovely and sweet and attractive...
0:24:25 > 0:24:28Can you stay with him for a bit? I've got to see Gav about something.
0:24:28 > 0:24:30Uh...uh... Yeah, OK.
0:24:32 > 0:24:36Deano, where's Chinese? He's got my phone.
0:24:36 > 0:24:39I think he's gone out for a fag. Um, Fingers, this...
0:24:39 > 0:24:40Hey, Louise, right?
0:24:40 > 0:24:42- Hiya. - Hey.
0:24:43 > 0:24:46- Yeah. Long time. - Yeah.
0:24:46 > 0:24:48- How have you been? All right? - Yeah, good.
0:24:48 > 0:24:49You?
0:24:49 > 0:24:53Right, so, do you two know each other?
0:24:55 > 0:24:57- Uh, well... - You could say that.
0:25:00 > 0:25:02I learnt Welsh and everything.
0:25:03 > 0:25:04Gav!
0:25:04 > 0:25:07- Hiya. - Oh, here we go.
0:25:07 > 0:25:09- Uncle Bryn's really drunk. - He's only had a couple.
0:25:09 > 0:25:11I know, but he doesn't drink, does he?
0:25:11 > 0:25:14- I'll go and see if he's all right. - No. I have something to show you.
0:25:16 > 0:25:18- Where did you get that? - Anje had it.
0:25:18 > 0:25:21She always keeps one on her, apparently - ever since, you know...
0:25:21 > 0:25:22Yeah, of course.
0:25:22 > 0:25:24- So, come on, then. Shall we? - What, here?
0:25:24 > 0:25:26Yeah. Don't you just want to find out?
0:25:26 > 0:25:27Yeah, yeah, I do.
0:25:39 > 0:25:40All right?
0:25:42 > 0:25:43Yeah. You?
0:25:43 > 0:25:46Yeah. You havin' a good night?
0:25:46 > 0:25:48Yeah. It's all right.
0:25:48 > 0:25:50It's Cardiff.
0:25:53 > 0:25:55Gav says you've set a date for the wedding.
0:25:55 > 0:25:57Yeah, June the 13th.
0:25:57 > 0:25:59- You OK to look after Neil...? - Goin' through with it, then?
0:26:01 > 0:26:03Yeah. Why?
0:26:05 > 0:26:08I'll look after Neil. No worries.
0:26:08 > 0:26:12# Something inside of me wants a part of you
0:26:12 > 0:26:15# Something kinda ooooh makes my heart go boom-boom
0:26:15 > 0:26:19# Something inside of me wanting what you do-oo-oo
0:26:19 > 0:26:20# Something kinda ooooh... #
0:26:21 > 0:26:23TOILET FLUSHES
0:26:23 > 0:26:26- How long's that now? - We've got about 30 seconds.
0:26:28 > 0:26:32I can't believe I just wee'd on my hand in front of you.
0:26:32 > 0:26:34You did worse things than that on our honeymoon.
0:26:34 > 0:26:36Gav, that was a treat!
0:26:53 > 0:26:56- OK. - SHE SQUEALS
0:26:59 > 0:27:02Oh, never mind, babes.
0:27:11 > 0:27:13- Babe? - Just give me a minute.
0:27:15 > 0:27:17Look, come on. It's only our first try.
0:27:17 > 0:27:19No, it's not.
0:27:20 > 0:27:22What?
0:27:22 > 0:27:23Stace?
0:27:24 > 0:27:26Stacey?
0:27:29 > 0:27:30It's not our first try.
0:27:30 > 0:27:32I don't understand.
0:27:32 > 0:27:34I haven't been on the pill for over a year.
0:27:34 > 0:27:36What you talking about?
0:27:37 > 0:27:39I stopped taking it when we got married.
0:27:40 > 0:27:41You've been trying to get pregnant
0:27:41 > 0:27:43for over a year and you didn't tell me.
0:27:43 > 0:27:44- Why? - I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
0:27:44 > 0:27:46Why did you think it was OK to do that?
0:27:46 > 0:27:48- I don't think it's OK. - Why did you do it, then?
0:27:48 > 0:27:50Because I thought it would speed things up.
0:27:50 > 0:27:51What?
0:27:51 > 0:27:53Like, if I got pregnant, we'd have to move out,
0:27:53 > 0:27:55get a house - oh, I don't know.
0:27:55 > 0:27:57You cannot make decisions like that without talking to me about it.
0:27:57 > 0:28:00- What is wrong with you? - Exactly.
0:28:00 > 0:28:02What is wrong with me, Gav?
0:28:05 > 0:28:08What if I can't have children?
0:28:13 > 0:28:18# Tell me tomorrow I'll wait by the window for you
0:28:23 > 0:28:26# I'll wait by your big house for you
0:28:31 > 0:28:36# I'll wait by the squeeze-box for you. #