0:00:02 > 0:00:04# Roll, river
0:00:04 > 0:00:07# Keep on rolling
0:00:09 > 0:00:11# Ancient lady
0:00:11 > 0:00:13# Cold
0:00:17 > 0:00:19# Roll, river
0:00:19 > 0:00:21# Roll. #
0:00:28 > 0:00:31OK, then. Yeah, all right. I'll see you later.
0:00:31 > 0:00:32Cheers. Bye.
0:00:34 > 0:00:36Who was that?
0:00:36 > 0:00:39That was Trish, the coma patient's daughter.
0:00:39 > 0:00:41- She's popping in later this afternoon.- What?!
0:00:41 > 0:00:43She's never been in before.
0:00:43 > 0:00:46You're going to have to move all that stuff out of the room, aren't you?
0:00:46 > 0:00:47I'm not bloody Pickfords!
0:00:47 > 0:00:50I really need an office.
0:00:50 > 0:00:52I'm going to crowbar that door open.
0:01:24 > 0:01:26Bollocks, I got 17% for my essay.
0:01:26 > 0:01:28Aww.
0:01:28 > 0:01:31(SCOFFS) Much help Damaris was.
0:01:31 > 0:01:34Den, can I put my Dr Pepper in your fridge?
0:01:34 > 0:01:37Mm, whatever. Although there will come a time, you know...
0:01:37 > 0:01:42Yes, when your breasts are all full up and squirting everywhere. Yes, happy days.
0:01:42 > 0:01:43Don't be grumpy!
0:01:43 > 0:01:46You're looking a bit pleased with yourself.
0:01:46 > 0:01:49- I'm just looking at pictures of the weekend.- What?
0:01:49 > 0:01:52Aiden took me away. We went to Norway.
0:01:52 > 0:01:55- Cor, you kept that quiet! - Well, it was a surprise.
0:01:55 > 0:01:59- I didn't know it was going to happen. It was to celebrate the baby.- Bloody hell!
0:01:59 > 0:02:02It was really nice of him. He paid for everything.
0:02:02 > 0:02:04Upgrades, flights, hotels.
0:02:04 > 0:02:07We went to see the Northern Lights. They didn't come out.
0:02:07 > 0:02:09But that was fine, it didn't really matter.
0:02:09 > 0:02:13Den, I'm sorry, I don't want to be mean, but, you know...
0:02:13 > 0:02:16Stuff's crap for me at the moment. I've got no money,
0:02:16 > 0:02:20no fags, no mentor, no time to myself.
0:02:20 > 0:02:23From where I'm standing, life couldn't be any more shit.
0:02:23 > 0:02:24Yeah, sorry.
0:02:24 > 0:02:26Oh, I take that back. Here comes Karl Marx.
0:02:28 > 0:02:32You need to get your bum under there, Kim. Under. Further. Get your bum under.
0:02:32 > 0:02:35Don't think I can't see you there, you class traitor.
0:02:35 > 0:02:39Oh, he-hello, Megan. Sorry, how did the strike go?
0:02:39 > 0:02:42A decent turnout, actually, no thanks to you.
0:02:42 > 0:02:45I just dropped by to let you have one of these...
0:02:45 > 0:02:48hospital Christmas card competition from the kids' oncology ward.
0:02:48 > 0:02:51What's the prize, then, a go on their Play-Doh factory?
0:02:51 > 0:02:53Don't be cynical, Kim.
0:02:53 > 0:02:56Oh, Megan, look, um, it arrived.
0:02:56 > 0:03:00Ooh. Amica? Oh, that's a good make, that, isn't it?
0:03:00 > 0:03:01- Good, can I have a look? - Yeah.
0:03:01 > 0:03:04- Are these yours? - No, those are Kim's actually.
0:03:04 > 0:03:09I'm afraid that's not allowed, Kim. Items appertaining solely to the staff member's childcare,
0:03:09 > 0:03:10if I'm not mistaken.
0:03:10 > 0:03:14Well, the staff member's child isn't going to be here for six months.
0:03:14 > 0:03:16Give em here, I need cheering up.
0:03:16 > 0:03:17Oh, Doris.
0:03:17 > 0:03:21(SIGHS) What are you doing out of bed?
0:03:21 > 0:03:24Come on, let's get you back. Why haven't you got your slippers on? Hmm?
0:03:24 > 0:03:27You need to put your slippers on if you're going to get out of bed.
0:03:27 > 0:03:30Right, come on, in you get.
0:03:32 > 0:03:35You have a little rest.
0:03:35 > 0:03:38Right. Where's Damaris? I need to give her one of these.
0:03:38 > 0:03:39Gone.
0:03:39 > 0:03:40Gone where?
0:03:40 > 0:03:42She's got a job as a nurse-bot on a space station
0:03:42 > 0:03:45- orbiting the planet Zarg. - Pardon?
0:03:45 > 0:03:48No, she's gone to a London teaching hospital.
0:03:48 > 0:03:50- She got a promotion.- Very nice.
0:03:50 > 0:03:52- Hang on a minute. - You told me that you...
0:03:52 > 0:03:57She beat me to it, she had already applied for some fancy post, so...
0:03:57 > 0:04:01Well, now that Damaris is gone, couldn't you be my mentor?
0:04:01 > 0:04:05I'd love to, but unfortunately I've got netball three nights a week
0:04:05 > 0:04:08and then there's my MSc and then there's my book club, so...
0:04:08 > 0:04:10You're supposed to support me.
0:04:10 > 0:04:12I do. Believe me, I do.
0:04:12 > 0:04:13You know what?
0:04:13 > 0:04:16I'm going to forget about this whole bloody doctor thing.
0:04:16 > 0:04:18Mm, good, it's probably for the best.
0:04:18 > 0:04:22- You don't seem too hot on the commitment thing.- Why should I bother? I'm going to give up.
0:04:22 > 0:04:25I think you'd be much happier, Kim. Honestly, I do.
0:04:25 > 0:04:27Right. I'm off, I'll call back later, Den.
0:04:27 > 0:04:30I've discovered a couple of more things you can claim for.
0:04:30 > 0:04:32Oh, great, thanks.
0:04:32 > 0:04:35- Morning, Donald.- Hi.
0:04:35 > 0:04:36- Oh, hi, Donald.- Hiya.
0:04:36 > 0:04:37Had it mended?
0:04:37 > 0:04:39- Yes.- Mm.
0:04:40 > 0:04:42Where are we going to put it?
0:04:42 > 0:04:43I don't know.
0:04:43 > 0:04:45Shall I move the fridge?
0:04:58 > 0:05:01What do you think about this Christmas card competition?
0:05:01 > 0:05:02Yeah, could be good, yeah.
0:05:02 > 0:05:05I reckon we could design something really nice.
0:05:05 > 0:05:07We could use one of yours and Aiden's photos,
0:05:07 > 0:05:09you know, from your weekend in Trollfjord.
0:05:09 > 0:05:12- Mm.- Oh, shouldn't that be "Trroll-fjurd"?
0:05:12 > 0:05:16It's an archipelago in the north of Norway. Er, gents, you don't need to write it down.
0:05:16 > 0:05:20- Den's just has been on a mini-break there.- Ah, right. Did you enjoy yourself, Den?
0:05:20 > 0:05:21- Oh, yeah. It was great, actually. - Good.
0:05:21 > 0:05:26Look, we went on a sleigh ride all the way to the ice hotel. See?
0:05:26 > 0:05:29But, unfortunately, it was fully booked up when we got there, so...
0:05:29 > 0:05:31Good. Um, have you seen Josh?
0:05:31 > 0:05:33- Yeah, I saw him.- Oh, yes?
0:05:33 > 0:05:35He was down in reception, on his way to Bonjour.
0:05:35 > 0:05:39Bloody hell, this one's more like one of Dr Moore's research photos, look.
0:05:39 > 0:05:42Kim! Can you please give me that...? Sorry.
0:05:42 > 0:05:44Please do not show pictures of me in my bra and pants
0:05:44 > 0:05:46to members of the junior medical staff.
0:05:46 > 0:05:50Well, I mean, at least they're not all grey and washed out, like mine.
0:05:51 > 0:05:53Hansley.
0:05:53 > 0:05:55Hello, I just wanted to say thank you so much for all your help,
0:05:55 > 0:05:58it's been absolutely invaluable.
0:05:58 > 0:05:59So you went for Minton versus Minton?
0:05:59 > 0:06:02Yes, yes, we did. Well, it was a bit of a nightmare in the end -
0:06:02 > 0:06:04Philip tried to get a second valuation on the house
0:06:04 > 0:06:07and he even had his lawyers sniffing round my vag-at
0:06:07 > 0:06:09to see if there was any money there, so...
0:06:09 > 0:06:12But you know, in the end, we went for the clean break.
0:06:12 > 0:06:15And your life, not overshadowed by the relationship that's broken down?
0:06:15 > 0:06:17That's how Lord Scarman described it.
0:06:17 > 0:06:21Well, I might just take him up on that! Er, anyway, that's it, it's...
0:06:21 > 0:06:23It's over.
0:06:23 > 0:06:28Um...oh, by the way, my solicitor said she might have something for you.
0:06:28 > 0:06:31I don't know if, er, est-ce que vous parlez francais, par chance?
0:06:31 > 0:06:33Oui, bien sur. Je parle francais, oui, oui.
0:06:33 > 0:06:34Ah, c'est...c'est tres bien.
0:06:34 > 0:06:37Je... Je pensais que peut-tre is vous...vous telephonez a...
0:06:37 > 0:06:39She's given me her number.
0:06:39 > 0:06:43If you give her a ring, she might be able to find you something. Um...
0:06:43 > 0:06:45That's her number.
0:06:45 > 0:06:46Merci. Thank you.
0:06:46 > 0:06:48Worth a call.
0:06:48 > 0:06:49I just think it's important
0:06:49 > 0:06:52someone behaves honourably in... in all of this mess.
0:06:52 > 0:06:54You know. But, anyway, that's it.
0:06:54 > 0:06:58It's over and, um...
0:06:58 > 0:07:00Thank you very much indeed.
0:07:00 > 0:07:02It's not a problem. Thank you.
0:07:11 > 0:07:14Den, isn't this the lady that was discharged recently?
0:07:14 > 0:07:18Yes. It's Mrs Dethick, yes. And she's been readmitted from A&E.
0:07:18 > 0:07:20I've a terrible ache in my left side.
0:07:20 > 0:07:25Is it, er, in the same place as last time, when we found... There wasn't anything wrong, was there?
0:07:25 > 0:07:27- Not as such, no. - It's lower down.
0:07:27 > 0:07:28It's lower now, is it? All right.
0:07:28 > 0:07:31Well, Sister, do you want to sort out the obs for this lady and...
0:07:31 > 0:07:34Kim, can you sort out the obs, please?
0:07:34 > 0:07:37And we'll pop back later. OK. Jolly good.
0:07:37 > 0:07:40Ah, didn't see you pop in there.
0:07:40 > 0:07:42- Oh, you've decided to join us, have you?- Yes, sorry.
0:07:43 > 0:07:45Right, speak to you about this later.
0:07:45 > 0:07:48We're going to see Mrs Rivers.
0:07:48 > 0:07:52All-righty. Good. So hello, Mrs...er, Miss Rivers.
0:07:52 > 0:07:54Is Mummy coming?
0:07:54 > 0:07:57Yes, Mummy is coming. Mummy's going to come soon.
0:07:57 > 0:07:59She's not coming, is she, Den?
0:07:59 > 0:08:02Um...you shouldn't, er, well, if the mother's not coming...
0:08:02 > 0:08:03Not literally coming, no.
0:08:03 > 0:08:07It might be in a vision of some kind, or a dream or something.
0:08:07 > 0:08:09Well, you don't know...
0:08:09 > 0:08:13I would like some sweeties. I want some sweeties.
0:08:13 > 0:08:16You're in hospital for a nasty abscess on your bottom. All right?
0:08:16 > 0:08:18I just need to have a quick look.
0:08:18 > 0:08:20No, I want some sweeties.
0:08:20 > 0:08:25Oh, yes. No, we haven't, um, got any...any sweeties...
0:08:25 > 0:08:26I've got a Boost.
0:08:26 > 0:08:30I've got hundredweight of Murray Mints and a Fudge bar.
0:08:30 > 0:08:33No, neither of these are...
0:08:33 > 0:08:36Oh, thank you so much, Dr Imbaca.
0:08:36 > 0:08:38Here we are, the nice doctor has given you some sweets.
0:08:38 > 0:08:40Um, is she diabetic, then?
0:08:40 > 0:08:43No, she's not diabetic, I wouldn't have given her sweets if she had been diabetic.
0:08:43 > 0:08:46Right. All right, well, you know, this may make her more amenable.
0:08:46 > 0:08:50If the sweets don't work, we might think about a mild sedative, then we can have a jolly good look at her.
0:08:50 > 0:08:52I don't know if you wanted to have a quick word with Mrs Patput -
0:08:52 > 0:08:55- she's leaving today. - Ah, yes, of course she is.
0:08:55 > 0:08:58Yes, you're off, aren't you, Mrs Patput. Um, well, you're looking wonderfully well,
0:08:58 > 0:09:00er, wish you the best of luck.
0:09:00 > 0:09:03Yes, your husband's phoned - he's going to be in at 12 to pick you up.
0:09:03 > 0:09:07Right, so don't keep him waiting. Thank you.
0:09:07 > 0:09:08I'm really sorry I was late today.
0:09:08 > 0:09:11Do you have an excuse for being late today?
0:09:11 > 0:09:13My sister swallowed a pen lid.
0:09:13 > 0:09:15Your sister swallowed a pen lid?
0:09:15 > 0:09:18You're going to have to think of something a little bit better than that.
0:09:18 > 0:09:22Do you want me to treat you to a cuppa in Chatters later, Kim?
0:09:22 > 0:09:25We can go and have a look through those pictures for the competition.
0:09:25 > 0:09:28Well, I was thinking about having another crack at my essay,
0:09:28 > 0:09:30but maybe it's not even worth it.
0:09:30 > 0:09:34It would be too much of a sad loss to nursing, really, wouldn't it?
0:09:34 > 0:09:37You being so good at hospital corners and all that.
0:09:37 > 0:09:38Sarky!
0:09:38 > 0:09:41Den, I've been thinking about somewhere for you to stay, I mean...
0:09:41 > 0:09:43No, no, honestly.
0:09:43 > 0:09:44It's fine.
0:09:44 > 0:09:47- I'm sorted.- Well, where, then?
0:09:47 > 0:09:48Oh.
0:09:48 > 0:09:51I wanted to show you something, actually.
0:09:51 > 0:09:53- PHONE BLEEPS - What about that one?
0:09:53 > 0:09:55BOTH LAUGH
0:09:55 > 0:09:57Oh, my L... That's quite rude.
0:09:57 > 0:09:59Oh, well, you can only see a bit of the crease.
0:09:59 > 0:10:02So, Josh, our vag-at is on the march,
0:10:02 > 0:10:05so it's sub-folder C, document PM27.
0:10:05 > 0:10:09Click, move, drop into the wallet, control, exit, click,
0:10:09 > 0:10:11drag into memory stick and exit.
0:10:11 > 0:10:13So I'll leave that little project with you.
0:10:13 > 0:10:16Any problems, just ask one of the nursing staff.
0:10:26 > 0:10:28Are you all right, Doctor?
0:10:38 > 0:10:41Oh, yeah. Oh, what about this one, Kim? That's a good one.
0:10:41 > 0:10:44Look, you've got all the sleigh dogs, the husky dogs.
0:10:44 > 0:10:48- Oh, it just looks really lovely, doesn't it? The snow...- The snow's a bit yellow there, though.
0:10:48 > 0:10:50Oh.
0:10:50 > 0:10:52Is it? Oh, yeah.
0:10:52 > 0:10:55Well, maybe you could Photoshop that, or something.
0:10:55 > 0:10:57All right. I'll have a go.
0:10:57 > 0:11:01The last break I had was two days in Aberystwyth in a caravan.
0:11:01 > 0:11:03It pissed down the whole time.
0:11:03 > 0:11:06Oh, I hate it when that happens.
0:11:10 > 0:11:14Den, I can't work out how to put letters on this card.
0:11:14 > 0:11:18Oh, it's easy, Kim. Look, you just...firstly you do...
0:11:18 > 0:11:21No, don't tell me how to do it. Can you just do it for me, please?
0:11:21 > 0:11:22Swap over.
0:11:27 > 0:11:30- Here you go, this is for you. - Oh, it's my free water.
0:11:30 > 0:11:31Thank you so much.
0:11:31 > 0:11:34- It's my free water, Kim.- Lovely. - See you.- Bye!
0:11:34 > 0:11:37You can help yourself. You need rehydration.
0:11:37 > 0:11:39No, thanks. I'll have my Dr Pepper.
0:11:39 > 0:11:44Kim, do you think I should put that up to a 22? It's 18 at the moment.
0:11:44 > 0:11:46Does that mean bigger?
0:11:46 > 0:11:48- Yeah.- Yeah, bigger.
0:11:48 > 0:11:49Bigger.
0:11:51 > 0:11:52- Ooh, that's it. - Oh, that's perfect.
0:11:52 > 0:11:53Oh, I'll tell you what,
0:11:53 > 0:11:57there's a career for you at Clinton Cards if it all goes tits up here.
0:11:57 > 0:11:59Can you sort that, then, and I'll get on with the drugs round?
0:11:59 > 0:12:00All right.
0:12:00 > 0:12:03Give us a handful of anti-depressants for Dave, will you?
0:12:03 > 0:12:05Oh, why?
0:12:05 > 0:12:08Oh, he's so bloody miserable cos he ain't got a job yet.
0:12:08 > 0:12:09Driving me mad.
0:12:09 > 0:12:12- Oh, it's rotten, isn't it? - Yeah, it is rotten.
0:12:12 > 0:12:14Not fair, somehow.
0:12:14 > 0:12:16Donald, is that you?
0:12:16 > 0:12:18Yeah, hello, it's Kim here.
0:12:18 > 0:12:20Yeah, can you pop down? Pick something up.
0:12:20 > 0:12:23About ten minutes, yeah? Brilliant, bye.
0:12:28 > 0:12:30GENTLE SNORING
0:13:08 > 0:13:10Ah, Hansley.
0:13:10 > 0:13:12Um...did you speak to Jenny?
0:13:12 > 0:13:13- Er, yes.- Right.
0:13:13 > 0:13:15And did she have a job for you at the solicitor's?
0:13:15 > 0:13:17Yes, it's an internship.
0:13:17 > 0:13:19- Good salary?- Expenses.
0:13:19 > 0:13:21Oh.
0:13:22 > 0:13:24Will you be able to afford to...to do it?
0:13:24 > 0:13:29I'm not sure... Maybe I'll get a job in the evening or something...
0:13:29 > 0:13:30Mmm.
0:13:30 > 0:13:31Oh, well, look, perhaps this is, er, will help.
0:13:31 > 0:13:34Um, something towards, er...
0:13:34 > 0:13:36Oh, no, no, thank you. I cannot accept that.
0:13:36 > 0:13:39Oh, please, Hansley, for goodness' sake, you know, please do.
0:13:39 > 0:13:41- You're terribly helpful. - No...
0:13:41 > 0:13:43- Thank you. - Do...with my...
0:13:43 > 0:13:45Thank you, I cannot accept that, thank you.
0:13:48 > 0:13:52Shall I give it to something like the African...Childhood Trust?
0:13:52 > 0:13:56Or education or...um...in your name?
0:13:56 > 0:13:58OK, yeah.
0:14:14 > 0:14:17Den. Mrs Patput's gone.
0:14:17 > 0:14:20- Oh, was her husband early? - No, no, no!
0:14:20 > 0:14:22Like gone, like "gone to heaven" gone.
0:14:23 > 0:14:25Are you sure?
0:14:26 > 0:14:27Well, I think so.
0:14:28 > 0:14:33She'd just had one of Josh's Percy Pigs. What a lovely last meal that is, isn't it?
0:14:47 > 0:14:49A bit sudden.
0:14:50 > 0:14:53Oh, it's going to be a terrible shock for her husband, innit?
0:14:53 > 0:14:55Hmm. Oh, I hope he hasn't left home yet.
0:14:55 > 0:14:56Right.
0:14:59 > 0:15:01Oh, I'll ring for a doctor.
0:15:01 > 0:15:04Hi, Ward K2 here. Yeah,
0:15:04 > 0:15:07can we have a doctor, please? Yep. Us soon as you can, thank you.
0:15:07 > 0:15:09- Den...- Oh, hi, Hilary.
0:15:09 > 0:15:12Have you got those keys I lent you last night? Oh, yeah...
0:15:12 > 0:15:13Hello, Kim.
0:15:13 > 0:15:15Hi, Hilary.
0:15:15 > 0:15:17Yeah, um, the keys for the, um,
0:15:17 > 0:15:20keys for the, um...for the office.
0:15:20 > 0:15:22- Er, no. No, I haven't. - Right.
0:15:22 > 0:15:25Have you tried down at the porter's office?
0:15:25 > 0:15:26No.
0:15:26 > 0:15:30Um, yes, I'll...I'll try them, thanks. Thank you.
0:15:30 > 0:15:34- Ooh, someone's been busy.- Kim...
0:15:34 > 0:15:38No, honestly, it's not what do you think. What do I think it is?
0:15:38 > 0:15:40- You think we're back together. - Are you?
0:15:40 > 0:15:41No, of course not!
0:15:42 > 0:15:44Give us a hand here, Kim.
0:15:44 > 0:15:48Listen, c-can I just say, Kim, this is not what do you think it is.
0:15:48 > 0:15:50Yeah, I've already said that.
0:15:50 > 0:15:51OK.
0:16:00 > 0:16:03Can you get that pillow out from under, please?
0:16:05 > 0:16:06Thank you.
0:16:12 > 0:16:14Oh, have you got Mrs Patput's notes there?
0:16:14 > 0:16:16- I have, yeah. - What year was she born again?
0:16:16 > 0:16:18Er, 1934.
0:16:18 > 0:16:20Oh, hang on! 1934...
0:16:25 > 0:16:26SHE SIGHS
0:16:27 > 0:16:29That would've freaked me out if that had worked.
0:16:29 > 0:16:30Mmm.
0:16:36 > 0:16:39- Denise, could I have a word, please?- Yes, fire away, yeah.
0:16:39 > 0:16:45I'm wearing my oncology ward Christmas card competition facilitator hat here.
0:16:45 > 0:16:47Oh, God, have I won?
0:16:47 > 0:16:48What do you mean, "Have I won?"?
0:16:48 > 0:16:50"Have we won?" - surely?
0:16:50 > 0:16:53So you were involved in this farrago, were you?
0:16:53 > 0:16:57Has that speccy sister off Ben Nevis won? She's so ambitious, isn't she?
0:16:57 > 0:17:00I don't know if this is your idea of some kind of sick joke,
0:17:00 > 0:17:04but I've just been in Oncology and someone has sent them in
0:17:04 > 0:17:07an obscene picture for the Christmas card competition.
0:17:07 > 0:17:10Kim, I told you not to go through my phone.
0:17:10 > 0:17:12If you've submitted one of those pictures,
0:17:12 > 0:17:14I swear I won't speak to you again. Honestly...
0:17:14 > 0:17:18Den, I swear, no, I did not. I put the doggy-snowy-boring one in.
0:17:18 > 0:17:22Luckily for you, they seem to have taken it in good spirit.
0:17:22 > 0:17:24Surprisingly good spirit, actually.
0:17:24 > 0:17:29But the fact is, this could have been a very serious matter.
0:17:29 > 0:17:32Now, I'm prepared not to take it any further so long as I have your assurance
0:17:32 > 0:17:34that I'll have your fullest support in future
0:17:34 > 0:17:37- as union branch secretary? - Yes, you do.- Thank you.
0:17:37 > 0:17:43Ah, Josh, I need to check something in file two, please, if you don't mind.
0:17:43 > 0:17:46That's it. No, that's it, that's it on the top, yes, thank you so much.
0:17:46 > 0:17:48Sorry, I didn't mean to be, um...
0:17:48 > 0:17:51Oh, and by the way, thank you so much for your Christmas e-card.
0:17:51 > 0:17:53Er, it was very nice...
0:17:53 > 0:17:58Rather early, but, er... you did send me a Christmas card, did you?
0:17:58 > 0:17:59Oh, Dr Moore...
0:17:59 > 0:18:03Sorry. I think one of your large-format vulval C-types has been sent
0:18:03 > 0:18:07down to kids' oncology for the Christmas card competition.
0:18:08 > 0:18:10No, I'm really not with you.
0:18:10 > 0:18:12I mean, Kim, Kim, you could explain...
0:18:12 > 0:18:17I did not send it. All I did was, I got the memory stick out of the computer,
0:18:17 > 0:18:20gave it to Donald and he took it down. It's not my fault.
0:18:20 > 0:18:23Are you telling me that we are dealing here
0:18:23 > 0:18:26with a picture of a patient's vulva?
0:18:26 > 0:18:28Might have been a Toyota Previa.
0:18:28 > 0:18:29SHE LAUGHS
0:18:29 > 0:18:32It's just a mix-up, Megan, honestly.
0:18:32 > 0:18:34- It's not funny.- Oh, come on!
0:18:34 > 0:18:38- It is not funny.- It's a hospital, Megan, for God's sake!
0:18:38 > 0:18:41People see pictures of other people's parts everywhere, on posters...
0:18:41 > 0:18:45Someone might have had a laugh, it might have cheered them up, for God's sake.
0:18:45 > 0:18:49Well, it is not as funny as that for the person involved because this is a data protection issue.
0:18:49 > 0:18:52Us far as I'm concerned, this is a private information issue
0:18:52 > 0:18:56which Nurse Wilde has er, violated.
0:18:56 > 0:18:58I think you will agree, Dr Moore, that the vulva belongs to somebody
0:18:58 > 0:19:01and we need to find out who that belongs to...
0:19:01 > 0:19:03The vulva is anonymous at this stage.
0:19:03 > 0:19:06We've got to apologise to whichever unfortunate individual
0:19:06 > 0:19:08- has appeared in this picture. - Well, how are we ever going to know
0:19:08 > 0:19:11who that is? I mean, they all look very similar.
0:19:11 > 0:19:12It's a blind study, so...
0:19:12 > 0:19:16Well, look, I have a copy of the picture here.
0:19:16 > 0:19:19We can have a look at it and maybe somebody will recognise it.
0:19:19 > 0:19:21I wouldn't know mine from Adam.
0:19:21 > 0:19:23Would you recognise yours?
0:19:23 > 0:19:26I don't think that's appropriate, necessary or certainly not amusing, Kim.
0:19:26 > 0:19:29I'm sorry. Actually, could we do this somewhere more private, please,
0:19:29 > 0:19:31- if it concerns my research? - Absolutely.
0:19:31 > 0:19:33Let's all go to my office.
0:19:33 > 0:19:34Thank you, Josh.
0:19:36 > 0:19:39So are we off to view the privates in private, then, Megan?
0:19:39 > 0:19:41Oh, Kim, you just are beyond the pale.
0:19:41 > 0:19:44Josh, just don't say anything, all right,
0:19:44 > 0:19:46this is not your fault, just absolutely, you know...?
0:19:51 > 0:19:55Right, what is paramount here is that my research is not affected.
0:19:55 > 0:20:00Well, Dr Moore, how many... specimens or samples or whatever,
0:20:00 > 0:20:02- how many did you have? - Um, about 30.
0:20:02 > 0:20:05Oh, shavings, we'll never identify it.
0:20:05 > 0:20:08No, that's quite severe labial deterioration.
0:20:08 > 0:20:09Um, it looks familiar...
0:20:09 > 0:20:11Could it be, um...?
0:20:18 > 0:20:19I suppose...
0:20:19 > 0:20:22Yes, I can confirm that is indeed the lady in question.
0:20:22 > 0:20:25That's good, at least we know whose whatsit it is.
0:20:25 > 0:20:26Miss Hughes,
0:20:26 > 0:20:30my research funding is absolutely vital to the future of this hospital.
0:20:30 > 0:20:33I think you will agree it would be foolhardy to put that at risk
0:20:33 > 0:20:36by some kneejerk admission by a staff member when...
0:20:36 > 0:20:38Dr Moore, may I remind you
0:20:38 > 0:20:41that I am the union rep on the Data Protection Committee,
0:20:41 > 0:20:44and we are duty bound to disclose to patients or their relatives
0:20:44 > 0:20:47whenever information pertaining to a patient has been stored.
0:20:47 > 0:20:50- Ah, well, it's hardly been stored...- Dr Moore, if you'd let me finish?
0:20:50 > 0:20:53Now, were there ever to be an appeal or a DPA hearing,
0:20:53 > 0:20:57I would be for the chop had I not acted properly and in accordance with the law,
0:20:57 > 0:20:59and, frankly, that's not a risk that I'm prepared to take.
0:20:59 > 0:21:01But what does that actually mean, Megan?
0:21:01 > 0:21:05It means, Nurse Wilde, what we have to tell the patient. We have no choice.
0:21:05 > 0:21:08Oh, well, then, we'll have to tell the daughter, won't we?
0:21:08 > 0:21:09Ah, no, no, no, not necessarily, no.
0:21:09 > 0:21:14Um, Mrs McIntosh, er, is in a coma and current orthodoxy suggests that, er,
0:21:14 > 0:21:16she can hear everything that we say.
0:21:16 > 0:21:20So I concur with Ms Hughes here that we simply tell the patient.
0:21:20 > 0:21:22- So... - But if she can't acknowledge
0:21:22 > 0:21:26that she's heard the apology, then, I'm sorry, we have to tell the relative.
0:21:26 > 0:21:29Yes, well, she's coming in this afternoon, so that's lucky, isn't it?
0:21:29 > 0:21:31- Good. - I'm not so sure, though.
0:21:31 > 0:21:33I mean, no-one knows how she's going to react.
0:21:33 > 0:21:37No, exactly. Us the consultant, I will make the decision on this one.
0:21:37 > 0:21:41Not in this case, Dr Moore. Data protection outweighs your authority, I'm afraid.
0:21:41 > 0:21:42It's like a game of Top Trumps, innit?
0:21:42 > 0:21:45- Kim, I've warned you.- Sorry.
0:21:45 > 0:21:48Nurse Hughes, are you saying that you're prepared to put at risk
0:21:48 > 0:21:51the career of a very promising young medical student
0:21:51 > 0:21:54simply to score a few points?
0:21:54 > 0:21:56They're not my rules, Dr Moore, I just abide by them.
0:21:56 > 0:21:58Oh, this is absolute nonsense!
0:21:58 > 0:22:01What time did you say she's coming in, Kim?
0:22:01 > 0:22:02Oh, about four.
0:22:02 > 0:22:05That means you're going to do it then? You're going to make the apology?
0:22:05 > 0:22:08Oh, no, not me. I just provide administrative support.
0:22:08 > 0:22:11No, no, as this is strictly speaking still a medical matter,
0:22:11 > 0:22:13then one of you needs to do that.
0:22:13 > 0:22:15But don't worry, I'll be there, as an observer,
0:22:15 > 0:22:18to monitor the compliance procedure.
0:22:30 > 0:22:32Do you think you'd manage a cup of tea, Mrs Dethick?
0:22:32 > 0:22:34I might.
0:22:35 > 0:22:37- There you are now. - Thank you very much.
0:22:37 > 0:22:39- I've given you a second sugar today.- Oh, thank you.
0:22:39 > 0:22:43Right, er, Mrs McIntosh's daughter is waiting in Chatters.
0:22:43 > 0:22:44Why, what did she say?
0:22:44 > 0:22:47Well, nothing. It's not my place to tell her anything.
0:22:47 > 0:22:49Right, shall we get this over with?
0:22:49 > 0:22:50I'll go and get her.
0:23:04 > 0:23:05Here we are.
0:23:05 > 0:23:07Ah, good afternoon, Miss McIntosh.
0:23:07 > 0:23:12Hello. Is anything wrong? Only I've not got long, I'm on a single bloody yellow.
0:23:12 > 0:23:14Ah, yeah, unfortunately, I'm afraid there is.
0:23:14 > 0:23:17- You're not turning Mother off, are you?- Er, well...
0:23:17 > 0:23:20I know this sounds harsh, but I think I could just about cope.
0:23:20 > 0:23:22It's not really a question about...
0:23:22 > 0:23:24Would I actually be required to turn off a switch?
0:23:24 > 0:23:26- I don't think I could do that. - Oh, no, no, Miss McIntosh...
0:23:26 > 0:23:29- no question of you turning switches off.- Oh.
0:23:29 > 0:23:32- Shall I start the ball rolling? - Um...
0:23:32 > 0:23:34- I'm happy not to. MEGAN:- Go ahead, Dr Moore.
0:23:34 > 0:23:39Miss McIntosh, I'm afraid there has been a small clerical error
0:23:39 > 0:23:41on the part of the nursing staff...
0:23:41 > 0:23:42And the medical staff.
0:23:42 > 0:23:44Thank you, Nurse Wilde.
0:23:44 > 0:23:46- I think perhaps I'd better deal with this.- Gladly.
0:23:46 > 0:23:51You'll remember I asked you for your permission to include your mum
0:23:51 > 0:23:53in my vital medical research...
0:23:53 > 0:23:55Yes, yes, a photo.
0:23:55 > 0:23:57- I'd rather not think about it. - I understand.
0:23:57 > 0:24:00Now, I'm afraid there has been a slight confusion
0:24:00 > 0:24:03which has resulted in a picture of your mother's, um...
0:24:03 > 0:24:04Vulva.
0:24:04 > 0:24:09..er, being, er, distributed around the hospital via the intranet...
0:24:09 > 0:24:11In the form of a Christmas card.
0:24:14 > 0:24:17LAUGHS HYSTERICALLY
0:24:20 > 0:24:23- So we just wanted to... - SHE CONTINUES LAUGHING
0:24:23 > 0:24:24..apologise.
0:24:24 > 0:24:27Um...
0:24:27 > 0:24:30Would you like to sit down, or...?
0:24:30 > 0:24:32- Thank you. - SHE SNIGGERS
0:24:38 > 0:24:41Well, you got away with it this time, Kim, my girl,
0:24:41 > 0:24:43but let this be a warning.
0:24:43 > 0:24:44I'm not a girl.
0:24:51 > 0:24:54Den, could I...? Have you had Mrs Dethick's test results back?
0:24:54 > 0:24:58- I just want to check those... - Bloods?- Yes, please, before I head off. Thank you.
0:24:58 > 0:25:01- Yep.- Here we are.
0:25:02 > 0:25:07- Mm-hm, right. - Oh, dear, yes, that's rather clear.
0:25:07 > 0:25:10- Mm. Do we have the CT scan, is that on here?- Um...
0:25:10 > 0:25:12Hang on a minute.
0:25:14 > 0:25:16Ah. Oh, dear.
0:25:16 > 0:25:20- Yes, that's pretty clear, isn't it? - Right, do you want to come through with me?
0:25:22 > 0:25:25Um, hello, Mrs Dethick.
0:25:25 > 0:25:26Hello.
0:25:26 > 0:25:28How are you feeling?
0:25:28 > 0:25:30Well, I've still got a pain.
0:25:30 > 0:25:34Mm, mm, you will have. Thank you, Sister.
0:25:34 > 0:25:37Um...
0:25:37 > 0:25:41Results are back and, well, not really good news,
0:25:41 > 0:25:45but it turns out that you were right all along.
0:25:45 > 0:25:48Um, I'm afraid there is something wrong with you.
0:25:48 > 0:25:51I knew it, I knew that.
0:25:51 > 0:25:53Mm, I'm afraid the most likely, um, scenario
0:25:53 > 0:25:55is that you have a tumour on your liver.
0:25:55 > 0:25:57- Oh.- I'm sorry about that.
0:26:00 > 0:26:02I'm all right.
0:26:02 > 0:26:04Would you like a few minutes?
0:26:04 > 0:26:07No. No, no.
0:26:07 > 0:26:11Would you like Sister to perhaps, um, stay with you?
0:26:11 > 0:26:14- Um...- No, no.
0:26:14 > 0:26:15No, it's OK.
0:26:15 > 0:26:18You seem very sanguine.
0:26:19 > 0:26:20Well, I...
0:26:22 > 0:26:27I'm really pleased, I'm really pleased that I was right.
0:26:33 > 0:26:37Jolly good. All right, I'll leave you with Sister and I'll see you later.
0:26:37 > 0:26:39- All right?- Mm, thank you.
0:26:39 > 0:26:41- Thank you.- All-righty.
0:26:43 > 0:26:45Are you all right, Mrs Dethick?
0:26:45 > 0:26:47Yes, I'm fine!
0:26:47 > 0:26:51I'm just pleased that I was right. You see, nobody believed me.
0:26:51 > 0:26:53I always believed you.
0:26:53 > 0:26:55- Did you? - I always believed you, Mrs Dethick.
0:26:55 > 0:26:58I've been saying to the doctor from the first time you came in...
0:26:58 > 0:27:03- Oh!- ..that you knew what you were talking about.- I'm so glad!
0:27:03 > 0:27:06- I felt like an idiot, you see. - No,
0:27:06 > 0:27:08you always had me on your side, Mrs Dethick.
0:27:08 > 0:27:10Thank you, thank you.
0:27:38 > 0:27:39Percy Pig?
0:27:39 > 0:27:42- Mm.- No, thank you.
0:28:25 > 0:28:28Kim?
0:28:28 > 0:28:30Kim!
0:28:30 > 0:28:31Kim!
0:28:34 > 0:28:36# Roll, river
0:28:38 > 0:28:40# Keep on rolling
0:28:42 > 0:28:44# Ancient lady
0:28:44 > 0:28:46# Cold
0:28:51 > 0:28:52# Roll, river
0:28:52 > 0:28:54# Roll. #