0:00:29 > 0:00:33APPLAUSE
0:00:37 > 0:00:41Good evening, welcome to Have I Got News For You, I'm Stephen Mangan.
0:00:41 > 0:00:42In the news this week,
0:00:42 > 0:00:44in China, responding to international pressure,
0:00:44 > 0:00:48Apple grudgingly allow their iPad factory workers out
0:00:48 > 0:00:49for a five-minute tea break.
0:00:58 > 0:00:59On the Costa del Sol,
0:00:59 > 0:01:03as an East End gang burst into a bank with sawn-off shotguns,
0:01:03 > 0:01:06the safe cracker realises that he's overslept.
0:01:11 > 0:01:13And in Westminster, Eric Pickles
0:01:13 > 0:01:17finally gets round to cleaning the fluff out of his belly button.
0:01:23 > 0:01:26It's delicious on toast.
0:01:26 > 0:01:30With Ian tonight is a writer and broadcaster, who says
0:01:30 > 0:01:33she hates people who are chronically pedantic over punctuation.
0:01:33 > 0:01:36Hang on, on Ian's team, comma,
0:01:36 > 0:01:38please welcome Grace Dent.
0:01:39 > 0:01:42APPLAUSE
0:01:44 > 0:01:47And with Paul tonight is the son of a vicar
0:01:47 > 0:01:49who studied divinity at university,
0:01:49 > 0:01:52plays a Church of England lay reader in the sitcom Rev,
0:01:52 > 0:01:54and is odds on to become the new Archbishop of Canterbury,
0:01:54 > 0:01:56Miles Jupp.
0:01:56 > 0:01:58APPLAUSE
0:02:03 > 0:02:06And we start with the bigger stories of the week.
0:02:06 > 0:02:09Ian and Grace take a look at this.
0:02:09 > 0:02:11- Tax return.- Never a welcome sight.
0:02:11 > 0:02:13"No tax due."
0:02:13 > 0:02:16That's one of Downing Street's kitchen suppers.
0:02:16 > 0:02:19Oh, look, here's George Osborne.
0:02:19 > 0:02:20He's not had a good time recently.
0:02:20 > 0:02:22He's just spotted some tax someone's paid.
0:02:24 > 0:02:27Very, very small.
0:02:27 > 0:02:30Essentially, Osborne was incredibly amazed to find a lot of rich people
0:02:30 > 0:02:32and rich companies don't pay any tax.
0:02:32 > 0:02:38It was a discovery right up there with gravity and DNA.
0:02:38 > 0:02:41Can you name another tax dodge the Government are trying to stamp out?
0:02:41 > 0:02:44Yeah, I mean, I think Osborne was trying, but this is the problem
0:02:44 > 0:02:46at the moment, it's all incompetence.
0:02:46 > 0:02:49He was trying to stop rich people avoiding tax,
0:02:49 > 0:02:53but he ended up stopping them giving away money to charity.
0:02:53 > 0:02:56Yes, currently you can claim tax relief on every penny
0:02:56 > 0:02:58you give to charity, but according to David Cameron...
0:03:03 > 0:03:05Like Eton, for example.
0:03:08 > 0:03:10APPLAUSE
0:03:10 > 0:03:14This is the worst thing he could have possibly done
0:03:14 > 0:03:16cos it just makes him look even more like the Child Catcher
0:03:16 > 0:03:18from Chitty Chitty Bang Bang.
0:03:18 > 0:03:22This is the shock news that many people try to avoid paying tax.
0:03:22 > 0:03:25My favourite is one senior Tory Party donor
0:03:25 > 0:03:30spent a night in a private jet, flying from Luton Airport
0:03:30 > 0:03:33out of British airspace to avoid staying in the country
0:03:33 > 0:03:34for more than 90 days,
0:03:34 > 0:03:38thus qualifying as a resident abroad for tax purposes.
0:03:38 > 0:03:39In a plane?
0:03:39 > 0:03:40- In a plane.- Brilliant.
0:03:40 > 0:03:43Could he not just get in a hot air balloon and tether that
0:03:43 > 0:03:44about three feet off the ground?
0:03:44 > 0:03:46You've got to leave the airspace.
0:03:46 > 0:03:48Oh, you've got to leave the airspace.
0:03:48 > 0:03:50So, you can't just jump up and down.
0:03:52 > 0:03:55Are you sure about that?
0:03:55 > 0:03:57What do you think Philip Green's doing?
0:03:57 > 0:04:01Yeah, I know what he's doing, but I don't think it's that... Anyway.
0:04:01 > 0:04:02London Luton is so far away from London
0:04:02 > 0:04:07that it's actually in international airspace?
0:04:07 > 0:04:09He flew from Luton out of British airspace.
0:04:09 > 0:04:12If you touch down anywhere they might get you for tax.
0:04:12 > 0:04:13Oh, I see.
0:04:13 > 0:04:16So, it's more enjoyable, as a rich person, to go nowhere.
0:04:16 > 0:04:20Sit in an aeroplane thinking, "I'm saving money."
0:04:20 > 0:04:22- Yeah.- They're a miserable bunch.
0:04:22 > 0:04:25Yes, this story appeared on The Mail Online website.
0:04:25 > 0:04:28But did you read what Eric Swindon,
0:04:28 > 0:04:32sorry, that's Eric, comma, Swindon, Grace, had to say about this?
0:04:32 > 0:04:33He said...
0:04:46 > 0:04:48Seems like a nice chap.
0:04:48 > 0:04:51So, when it comes to tax, what does every politician really want?
0:04:51 > 0:04:55To be able to declare their own tax affairs and make them public.
0:04:55 > 0:04:57- Transparency?- Exactly.
0:04:57 > 0:05:00And what do they mean by transparency in this case?
0:05:00 > 0:05:02We're not going to do it.
0:05:02 > 0:05:05They mean revealing a very small amount of information
0:05:05 > 0:05:06that doesn't tell you too much.
0:05:06 > 0:05:10So, you just put your income in, and if income isn't your big thing,
0:05:10 > 0:05:15if, say, assets, say you're in the cabinet...
0:05:15 > 0:05:18just thinking randomly, then you don't have to declare those.
0:05:18 > 0:05:22So, you know, transparency up to a point, which is opaque!
0:05:24 > 0:05:26Makes a lot of sense, yes.
0:05:26 > 0:05:28Yes, according to the Guardian...
0:05:36 > 0:05:38Let's hope they don't mean Eric Pickles.
0:05:38 > 0:05:40Yuck.
0:05:40 > 0:05:41According to the Express...
0:05:46 > 0:05:49According to the Telegraph George Osborne says he hasn't...
0:05:52 > 0:05:55Which face does he use when he sets his face against it?
0:05:55 > 0:05:56Does he use this face?
0:05:58 > 0:06:00Or this face?
0:06:01 > 0:06:02Or this face?
0:06:05 > 0:06:08So, why is it all kicking off now, what started this rumpus?
0:06:08 > 0:06:09It's Ken Livingstone.
0:06:09 > 0:06:10That's right.
0:06:10 > 0:06:13It was discovered that Ken had said that people who avoid tax
0:06:13 > 0:06:15are rich bastards who shouldn't be allowed to vote.
0:06:15 > 0:06:19And then it turned out he pays a lot of his earnings into a company,
0:06:19 > 0:06:23and pays not tax at 40%, but corporate tax at 21%.
0:06:23 > 0:06:27And a lot of people irresponsibly thought, "He's avoiding tax,
0:06:27 > 0:06:29"what a bastard."
0:06:31 > 0:06:33Then there was a fight between him and Boris.
0:06:33 > 0:06:34In a radio station. In a lift!
0:06:34 > 0:06:37What did he call him though? Did he call him a lying wanker?
0:06:37 > 0:06:39No, I'm afraid it was the F-word.
0:06:39 > 0:06:41- BLEEP- lying wanker?
0:06:43 > 0:06:44Sorry.
0:06:46 > 0:06:48I'm not helping here, am I?
0:06:48 > 0:06:51That happens to be one of our finest banks.
0:06:51 > 0:06:53You're very close.
0:06:53 > 0:06:56Boris screamed into Ken's face...
0:06:58 > 0:07:01Presumably a phrase Boris picked up from his wife.
0:07:05 > 0:07:08How's Ken's election campaign going?
0:07:08 > 0:07:11Well, he was shown a film of himself this week,
0:07:11 > 0:07:15and he was absolutely moved to tears by the image of himself.
0:07:15 > 0:07:18Just people talking about how wonderful he was.
0:07:18 > 0:07:20He had a little cry. But not just a little cry, a proper cry.
0:07:20 > 0:07:22Oh.
0:07:23 > 0:07:26It's like a cartoon bear cry.
0:07:26 > 0:07:30He's saying, "I don't believe YOU'RE leader of the Labour Party!"
0:07:31 > 0:07:34It'd be interesting to know what Miliband is smelling
0:07:34 > 0:07:35at that particular moment!
0:07:39 > 0:07:43I met Ken just before Christmas, I was doing a panel with him,
0:07:43 > 0:07:46and as part of that panel I was given, someone gave me a gift
0:07:46 > 0:07:48of a copy of the Koran.
0:07:48 > 0:07:51And afterwards I went into the Green Room,
0:07:51 > 0:07:54and Ken was sitting on the arm of a sofa,
0:07:54 > 0:07:57and I was carrying the Koran and a biro.
0:07:57 > 0:08:00And he looked up at me, and I said, as a joke,
0:08:00 > 0:08:02"Would you sign it for me, Ken?"
0:08:02 > 0:08:06And he went, "Yeah, all right." And he took it from me and signed it.
0:08:06 > 0:08:08So I now have quite an inflammatory piece of literature
0:08:08 > 0:08:09in some people's eyes.
0:08:13 > 0:08:15APPLAUSE
0:08:17 > 0:08:21Which trendy, ultra touchy-feely companies have been avoiding tax?
0:08:21 > 0:08:26Amazon, who've made £7 billion and paid no corporate sales tax.
0:08:26 > 0:08:31That's perfectly reasonable, that's a tax rate of 0%.
0:08:31 > 0:08:33They've made billions of pounds and they pay no tax,
0:08:33 > 0:08:35what's your problem?
0:08:35 > 0:08:38There's a difference between avoidance and evasion though.
0:08:38 > 0:08:39You would evade...
0:08:39 > 0:08:40I would not!
0:08:43 > 0:08:44I might evade.
0:08:44 > 0:08:46I'm not Ken Livingstone, you know!
0:08:46 > 0:08:48Then there's also that thing that people like Mick Jagger
0:08:48 > 0:08:52and Ringo Starr and Bob Geldof have done
0:08:52 > 0:08:55where you get your property and then you put it into a company abroad
0:08:55 > 0:08:57and then if you've got something that's worth 50 billion
0:08:57 > 0:08:59you don't pay any tax on it.
0:08:59 > 0:09:02- Are you suggesting what they're doing is wrong?- I think that...
0:09:02 > 0:09:06- Bob Geldof?- I think that's wrong. Is that not wrong?
0:09:06 > 0:09:10You pronounce him like he's a character in Lord Of The Rings.
0:09:10 > 0:09:12Bob Gel-dorf.
0:09:12 > 0:09:15I don't think any of these people are suspected of any wrongdoing.
0:09:15 > 0:09:18Yes, Amazon is under investigation by UK tax authorities
0:09:18 > 0:09:21for registering its UK sales operation in Luxembourg,
0:09:21 > 0:09:24claiming only its distribution arm is in the UK.
0:09:24 > 0:09:29In 2010 they would have paid £35 million in UK tax,
0:09:29 > 0:09:34but they managed to reduce that slightly to... nothing.
0:09:34 > 0:09:37Google are using a Dutch Sandwich,
0:09:37 > 0:09:39ever tried a Dutch Sandwich, Ian?
0:09:39 > 0:09:41Um...
0:09:41 > 0:09:44Google's UK operation is based in Ireland,
0:09:44 > 0:09:47where the rate of tax is half that of Britain.
0:09:47 > 0:09:50They then funnel the profits via the Netherlands to Bermuda,
0:09:50 > 0:09:55which enables them to pay a tax rate of a quarter of 1%.
0:09:55 > 0:09:57Blimey.
0:09:57 > 0:10:00If you Google "tax",
0:10:00 > 0:10:02does it give you nothing?
0:10:02 > 0:10:04Probably not.
0:10:04 > 0:10:07Right, moving from a tax on the rich and privileged
0:10:07 > 0:10:11to attacks on the rich and privileged. See what I did there?
0:10:11 > 0:10:16Can you think of any attacks on the rich and privileged recently?
0:10:16 > 0:10:18Anyone swimming.
0:10:18 > 0:10:20Trenton. Trenton?
0:10:20 > 0:10:24- Trenton.- Trenton Oldfield swam into the middle of the Thames
0:10:24 > 0:10:26and stopped the boat race.
0:10:26 > 0:10:29He was doing things like encouraging anarchist cleaners
0:10:29 > 0:10:34to not put toilet roll in the toilets of rich people.
0:10:34 > 0:10:37They'd just wipe their bums with poor people then.
0:10:38 > 0:10:40Not really achieving any aims, is it?
0:10:40 > 0:10:43Someone posted this on YouTube of Trenton in action.
0:10:43 > 0:10:45Trenton? Trenton!
0:10:47 > 0:10:49Trenton! TRENTON.
0:10:49 > 0:10:52TRENTON! TRENTO-ON!
0:10:55 > 0:10:59Right, Trenton!
0:10:59 > 0:11:02Oh, Jesus Christ!
0:11:02 > 0:11:07APPLAUSE
0:11:07 > 0:11:10The crowd were angry. According to The Mail they shouted...
0:11:18 > 0:11:19And most devastatingly of all...
0:11:26 > 0:11:30Let's not forget, while we are arguing the toss over income tax,
0:11:30 > 0:11:32the Greek economy could drag us all down.
0:11:32 > 0:11:35Here's Jeremy Paxman using his scalpel-like analysis
0:11:35 > 0:11:38on the former Greek finance minister.
0:11:38 > 0:11:43Joining us now from Athens is Giorgos Papakanstu-konstu-konstantino
0:11:43 > 0:11:46who, until the middle of last year, was Greece's Finance Minister,
0:11:46 > 0:11:48now he is Minister for the Environment.
0:11:48 > 0:11:51Also with us is the former Conservative Cabinet minister
0:11:51 > 0:11:52John Redwood.
0:11:52 > 0:11:55Mr Papakonstinton-konstin-konstantinou.
0:11:55 > 0:11:59Forgive me, I'm so sorry!
0:12:03 > 0:12:06This is the row over tax avoidance by the rich,
0:12:06 > 0:12:09or as they're known since the budget, the richer.
0:12:09 > 0:12:11According to a recent poll...
0:12:15 > 0:12:19The other 40% don't follow current affairs.
0:12:19 > 0:12:22Adding to the heartbreak of the rich this week
0:12:22 > 0:12:24was Trenton Oldfield who disrupted the boat race.
0:12:24 > 0:12:26Although, to be fair,
0:12:26 > 0:12:28it's not the first sighting of a turd in the Thames.
0:12:28 > 0:12:31AUDIENCE GROANS
0:12:31 > 0:12:35Yes, this was the 158th boat race, shown live on the BBC.
0:12:35 > 0:12:37According to the Sun...
0:12:42 > 0:12:46And then a bloke appeared in the water to liven things up.
0:12:47 > 0:12:51Paul and Miles, some recent history for you.
0:12:51 > 0:12:54This is the pasty-gate story, there's David Cameron there
0:12:54 > 0:12:57and it's the Sunday Times filming this bloke Cruddas...
0:12:57 > 0:13:00Oh, there's jerry cans, fill them up with petrol,
0:13:00 > 0:13:02if you haven't got one, keep it in your mouth.
0:13:02 > 0:13:04Francis Maude giving out ridiculous advice
0:13:04 > 0:13:06that people should store petrol in their sheds,
0:13:06 > 0:13:09garages or second houses.
0:13:09 > 0:13:12Just absolute nightmare situation, where people are doing this,
0:13:12 > 0:13:14it's very dangerous.
0:13:14 > 0:13:17So this is the thing about, if you can't store it in your garage,
0:13:17 > 0:13:20store it in a pasty, at least you know where it is.
0:13:20 > 0:13:23As long as you don't heat it up, you won't pay 20% tax,
0:13:23 > 0:13:26or, indeed, blow your house up.
0:13:26 > 0:13:29So, it's pasties and petrol, but I'm never quite sure which is which.
0:13:29 > 0:13:31Yes, this is a look back at recent Government gaffes,
0:13:31 > 0:13:34involving the price of pasties, the panic buying of petrol,
0:13:34 > 0:13:36and the total pillock, Peter Cruddas.
0:13:36 > 0:13:41How did George Osborne turn a pasty into a hot potato?
0:13:41 > 0:13:44Well, it's some sort of rule now, so, if you buy your pasty cold
0:13:44 > 0:13:47it costs so much money, but if it's heated up you pay 20% extra,
0:13:47 > 0:13:49because it's now become an ambient pasty,
0:13:49 > 0:13:52it's become more than room temperature.
0:13:52 > 0:13:55Paul's not only right, but I think if you queue for the pasty
0:13:55 > 0:13:59while it's being warmed up and then it goes cold again,
0:13:59 > 0:14:02it does this, the graph of what you have to pay.
0:14:02 > 0:14:04So, at the beginning of the queue it's 20% up,
0:14:04 > 0:14:09but if it gets cold again, it's a cold pasty, so it's 20% down.
0:14:09 > 0:14:12So, if you buy a pasty that's hot and you take it home and it's cold,
0:14:12 > 0:14:13you're owed a rebate.
0:14:15 > 0:14:18Yes, it's a terrifically well thought out piece of legislation.
0:14:18 > 0:14:21After accusations the Government was out-of-touch
0:14:21 > 0:14:23with ordinary people's love of pasties,
0:14:23 > 0:14:25what was David Cameron quick to announce?
0:14:25 > 0:14:28He said, "I had a pasty recently."
0:14:28 > 0:14:30And he said he'd eaten this in Leeds, and it's been proved
0:14:30 > 0:14:33Leeds disappeared about five years ago, so it's no longer there.
0:14:33 > 0:14:35Leeds no longer exists, yes.
0:14:35 > 0:14:38They go relegated from the Premiership and the actual area
0:14:38 > 0:14:40was taken down. Dismantled.
0:14:40 > 0:14:41Yes, that's right.
0:14:41 > 0:14:44It's real acting talent, isn't it, for all those people?
0:14:44 > 0:14:48Cos Ed Miliband immediately went with Ed Balls to Greggs,
0:14:48 > 0:14:49and they both ate a pie,
0:14:49 > 0:14:54and the Tory cabinet had to all go to Greggs, "What is this?"
0:14:54 > 0:14:57"Have you seen the size of these volauvents? They're huge!
0:14:57 > 0:14:59"What is this?
0:14:59 > 0:15:02"Is somebody in there? Hello?"
0:15:02 > 0:15:05It's good advertising for Greggs, though, isn't it?
0:15:05 > 0:15:07Because if they get VAT added to their products,
0:15:07 > 0:15:11that's about the only chance of having any kind of luxury label.
0:15:11 > 0:15:12Do you eat pasties, Ian?
0:15:12 > 0:15:14No, you see, I commute,
0:15:14 > 0:15:17and I was very keen that the tax on pasties
0:15:17 > 0:15:19should go up to £1 million.
0:15:19 > 0:15:23Cos the train I get is full of blokes who've had too much to drink
0:15:23 > 0:15:26getting a pasty, hoping it's going to soak it all up,
0:15:26 > 0:15:28they shove it in their face.
0:15:28 > 0:15:30And I'm sitting there trying to do the crossword.
0:15:32 > 0:15:3420 minutes into the journey, nothing.
0:15:36 > 0:15:38Sometimes I just fill in anything,
0:15:38 > 0:15:41to make people opposite me think I can do it. Just.
0:15:44 > 0:15:48That's quite a sad life you conjure up there, Ian.
0:15:49 > 0:15:52These pasty-chomping, beer-soaked individuals,
0:15:52 > 0:15:54you're trying to impress by doing the crossword.
0:15:56 > 0:15:59There's issues of self-esteem here, I think.
0:15:59 > 0:16:01Very sad.
0:16:01 > 0:16:05Is it in first class that people sit opposite you eating pasties?
0:16:05 > 0:16:07No, it's not first class, no, it's ordinary.
0:16:07 > 0:16:10- You travel in standard?- Yeah.
0:16:10 > 0:16:12Don't you feel threatened?
0:16:13 > 0:16:15He's got his own train!
0:16:15 > 0:16:17APPLAUSE
0:16:23 > 0:16:25Yes, David Cameron said he loved a hot pasty,
0:16:25 > 0:16:27and had indeed recently bought one
0:16:27 > 0:16:29from the West Cornwall Pasty Company,
0:16:29 > 0:16:32he went on to tell this highly amusing anecdote.
0:16:32 > 0:16:36I seem to remember I was in Leeds Station at the time,
0:16:36 > 0:16:40the choice was whether to have one of their small ones or their large ones,
0:16:40 > 0:16:43I've got a feeling I opted for the large one and very good it was too.
0:16:45 > 0:16:48"Very good it was too!"
0:16:48 > 0:16:50I think he was talking about the pasties there,
0:16:50 > 0:16:53not Leeds Station's wide variety of prostitutes.
0:16:55 > 0:16:56So was that an end?
0:16:56 > 0:16:59Sorry, what did you say then?
0:16:59 > 0:17:00I didn't say anything.
0:17:00 > 0:17:03Oh, OK, fine. You were miming to a backing tape.
0:17:03 > 0:17:05I was out of British airspace at that time.
0:17:05 > 0:17:07Was that an end to the matter?
0:17:07 > 0:17:09- Probably not. - Everyone jumped on the bandwagon.
0:17:09 > 0:17:11A spokesman announced that Nick Clegg...
0:17:16 > 0:17:20How big was it, if it's taken him a few months to eat it?
0:17:20 > 0:17:24He was waiting for Ian to turn up with the crossword.
0:17:24 > 0:17:27Ed Davey, the Liberal Democrat Energy Secretary, pointed out...
0:17:33 > 0:17:36Now he works in an even bigger one!
0:17:37 > 0:17:39And just as everything was beginning to die down,
0:17:39 > 0:17:42Housing Minister Grant Shapps did his party no favours
0:17:42 > 0:17:44in this interview on The Andrew Marr Show
0:17:44 > 0:17:48where, despite being asked completely unrelated questions,
0:17:48 > 0:17:50he seemed a man obsessed with shoehorning
0:17:50 > 0:17:51pasties into the interview.
0:17:51 > 0:17:53Isn't there a risk people are thinking either,
0:17:53 > 0:17:55"This is an incompetent government."
0:17:55 > 0:17:57Or, "This is a government not all in it together
0:17:57 > 0:17:59"and that's supporting the rich?"
0:17:59 > 0:18:03We can spend an interview like this talking about pasties and whether they're hot or cold...
0:18:03 > 0:18:05What's worse, to be accused of incompetence
0:18:05 > 0:18:07or to be accused of being a party of the rich?
0:18:07 > 0:18:10These are the really big issues, the VAT, the deficit reduction,
0:18:10 > 0:18:12the things which are going to change this country radically
0:18:12 > 0:18:14like Michael Gove's education reforms.
0:18:14 > 0:18:16Those are the things that matter.
0:18:16 > 0:18:19Of course we can talk about pasties and who knows who for how long.
0:18:19 > 0:18:22Opinion polls suggest that you're a party of chums.
0:18:22 > 0:18:24This is a government that understands that what you need to do
0:18:24 > 0:18:28is govern for everyone and, again, a bit like the pasties...
0:18:31 > 0:18:32What's he up to?
0:18:32 > 0:18:36We also saw Peter Cruddas, who was the Tory Party co-treasurer.
0:18:36 > 0:18:39What was he offering to feed to David Cameron?
0:18:39 > 0:18:41- Money.- Money.
0:18:41 > 0:18:42Donors.
0:18:42 > 0:18:46You got to have dinner with Cameron if you paid up enough money.
0:18:46 > 0:18:50And you could influence Government policy for literally just £250,000.
0:18:51 > 0:18:53So, Labour should have put up somebody,
0:18:53 > 0:18:55paid £250,000,
0:18:55 > 0:18:57go in there, influence Government policy.
0:18:57 > 0:18:59Easy, don't have to win an election.
0:18:59 > 0:19:01Absolutely!
0:19:01 > 0:19:04It was only... £250,000 was just for a kitchen supper.
0:19:04 > 0:19:06But, no, what's a kitchen supper at your house?
0:19:06 > 0:19:11A kitchen supper is for people you don't want in the dining room.
0:19:11 > 0:19:12There you go, see?
0:19:12 > 0:19:15Cruddas was secretly filmed offering access to David Cameron
0:19:15 > 0:19:17in exchange for large donations to the Tory Party,
0:19:17 > 0:19:20and offered to feed their views into the policy unit at Number Ten.
0:19:20 > 0:19:23Let's look at a meeting with undercover reporters
0:19:23 > 0:19:24from the Sunday Times.
0:19:24 > 0:19:28200 grand, 250 is Premier League.
0:19:28 > 0:19:33If you're unhappy about something, we'll listen to you,
0:19:33 > 0:19:36and we'll put it into the policy committee at Number Ten.
0:19:36 > 0:19:41We feed all feedback into the policy committee.
0:19:41 > 0:19:44What you can't see is that he's talking to Nick Clegg!
0:19:45 > 0:19:49According to the Sunday Times, Peter Cruddas boasted
0:19:49 > 0:19:51that he'd flattered one donor, Lord Glendonbrook,
0:19:51 > 0:19:55into making a million pound donation, how did he do that?
0:19:55 > 0:19:58He said, "Oh, we're going to put you on the bank notes."
0:20:00 > 0:20:04It was a pyjama party at Number Ten, £250,000 gets you dinner,
0:20:04 > 0:20:08if you pay more, you can stay on for the...entertainment.
0:20:09 > 0:20:12They get a bit drunk, there is a bottle of whatever,
0:20:12 > 0:20:14they say "Let's play Twister,"
0:20:14 > 0:20:19and they go, "I've forgotten my trousers," it is one of those nights.
0:20:19 > 0:20:21They go, "It is a bit late, why don't you stay?"
0:20:21 > 0:20:24"I haven't got any pyjamas." "It doesn't matter."
0:20:24 > 0:20:28"I will put the central heating on."
0:20:28 > 0:20:34You wake up in the morning feeling so... Oh, sorry!
0:20:34 > 0:20:36When you said pyjama party, I had images
0:20:36 > 0:20:39of David Cameron and Lord Glendenbrook brushing their teeth together.
0:20:39 > 0:20:42I thought that was quite sweet. It's not - it's bribery.
0:20:46 > 0:20:49- Has that been cleared with the lawyer?- It'll be fine.
0:20:49 > 0:20:51Cameron is crooked.
0:20:53 > 0:20:56He flattered him into doing it by presenting him
0:20:56 > 0:20:59with a birthday card, personally signed by David Cameron.
0:20:59 > 0:21:02When the undercover reporters asked what tactics
0:21:02 > 0:21:05he had used to persuade the Prime Minister to make the gesture, he replied...
0:21:10 > 0:21:13The spotlight soon fell on other donors.
0:21:31 > 0:21:34How did Francis Maude deftly manage to distract
0:21:34 > 0:21:37attention from the damage being done by pasties and Peter Cruddas?
0:21:37 > 0:21:40Put petrol in your bath!
0:21:41 > 0:21:43Drink as much of it as you can, keep it in your hat.
0:21:45 > 0:21:49Is there a spare pram in the hallway the children are growing out of,
0:21:49 > 0:21:53cover it in petrol, and push it outside on a hot sunny day,
0:21:53 > 0:21:56with magnified glass above it.
0:21:56 > 0:22:02Make your children wear paper clothes. All that sort of stuff.
0:22:02 > 0:22:03He suggested that...
0:22:07 > 0:22:10Instead of rushing to the garage to panic buy petrol,
0:22:10 > 0:22:15thousands rushed to Halfords to panic buy jerry cans,
0:22:15 > 0:22:18sales of which went up 500%.
0:22:18 > 0:22:21One motorist summed up the situation.
0:22:24 > 0:22:29Having given his verdict on the utter stupidity of panic buying petrol, he added...
0:22:33 > 0:22:38George Galloway won an ultra-safe Labour seat in what he called the Bradford Spring.
0:22:38 > 0:22:42How did he appeal to the voters?
0:22:42 > 0:22:44He spoke about things in which they're interested
0:22:44 > 0:22:48and about which they feel passionately and they agreed with him.
0:22:50 > 0:22:53He went for the Islamic vote and there were a lot of them
0:22:53 > 0:22:57and they voted for him and democratically, that means he wins.
0:22:57 > 0:23:01Anyone hear what he had to say about politics and bottoms?
0:23:01 > 0:23:07I put it down to a tidal wave of alienation, not just in Bradford,
0:23:07 > 0:23:10against the Tweedledee Tweedledum politics of the major parties.
0:23:10 > 0:23:12If a backside could have three cheeks,
0:23:12 > 0:23:15they would be the three cheeks of that backside.
0:23:15 > 0:23:18..the Tweedledee, Tweedledum, Tweedledee-and-a-half.
0:23:18 > 0:23:20If a backside could have three cheeks,
0:23:20 > 0:23:22they are sitting in the House of Commons.
0:23:22 > 0:23:27The three main political parties all offer one variety of the same thing.
0:23:27 > 0:23:29If a backside could have three cheeks,
0:23:29 > 0:23:31they would be the three cheeks of the same backside.
0:23:31 > 0:23:34A tidal wave of dissatisfaction, alienation,
0:23:34 > 0:23:38derision, even, against the mainstream political parties
0:23:38 > 0:23:40who all stand for the same things.
0:23:40 > 0:23:45If a backside could have three cheeks, they would be those three cheeks.
0:23:45 > 0:23:49A backside with three cheeks would require one massive arsehole.
0:23:52 > 0:23:56APPLAUSE
0:23:58 > 0:24:01Every night, his PR people would be going,
0:24:01 > 0:24:06"The anti-war stuff is working well. People like that, but the thing you say about the bottoms..."
0:24:09 > 0:24:12This is the run of scandals, including pasty-gate,
0:24:12 > 0:24:14dinner-gate, and the totally unnecessary panic over petrol,
0:24:14 > 0:24:19caused by ill-advised comments of Francis Maude...gate.
0:24:19 > 0:24:22The Prime Minister was caught telling lies about the last time he ate a pasty.
0:24:22 > 0:24:25David Cameron now claims he always has...
0:24:28 > 0:24:31David, that's a beef Wellington!
0:24:32 > 0:24:35David Cameron claimed to have had a pasty in a Yorkshire pasty shop
0:24:35 > 0:24:37that had closed five years earlier,
0:24:37 > 0:24:40just after Eric Pickles moved from Yorkshire to London.
0:24:40 > 0:24:43As panic-buying continued,
0:24:43 > 0:24:46one AA man reported seeing a 75-year-old woman
0:24:46 > 0:24:48at a petrol station filling up...
0:24:53 > 0:24:56Which sounds mad, but to be fair, it is the only way to store it,
0:24:56 > 0:24:58as she didn't have a car.
0:25:01 > 0:25:02Time for the Odd One Out round.
0:25:02 > 0:25:07Your four are, the First Lady of Syria, Asma Al-Assad,
0:25:07 > 0:25:11Anthony Worrall Thompson, a passenger aboard a private jet
0:25:11 > 0:25:15at Luton Airport, and online shopper, Mr Chiu.
0:25:15 > 0:25:18Is this about shopping?
0:25:18 > 0:25:22She does a lot of online shopping, so you can see the things that
0:25:22 > 0:25:25she's been treating herself to while thousands are being killed.
0:25:25 > 0:25:26It would get you down.
0:25:26 > 0:25:29You'd need to go and buy a chandelier.
0:25:29 > 0:25:33Anthony Worrall Thompson shops with the five-fingered discount.
0:25:36 > 0:25:39- What does that mean? - Nicking stuff.
0:25:39 > 0:25:43Different worlds, isn't it, me and you?
0:25:43 > 0:25:46Who is the guy...? Is he buying things?
0:25:46 > 0:25:49He's an online shopper, that's the clue.
0:25:49 > 0:25:52He's shopping online, I reckon.
0:25:54 > 0:25:58It's like watching Sherlock Holmes at his finest.
0:25:58 > 0:26:02Teasing out the truth from a slender strand of clue.
0:26:03 > 0:26:06They are all candidates to become the next director general.
0:26:06 > 0:26:08- What, including Luton Airport?- Yeah.
0:26:11 > 0:26:14- Is it tax?- It is to do with paying.
0:26:14 > 0:26:20- He doesn't pay. She hasn't paid any of her bills?- Not quite.
0:26:20 > 0:26:21We don't know!
0:26:21 > 0:26:25We could add to the general air of gloom and despondency
0:26:25 > 0:26:26by saying we don't know either.
0:26:26 > 0:26:29Good. They have all avoided paying the full amount,
0:26:29 > 0:26:35apart from an online shopper, named Mr Chiu, who paid a total
0:26:35 > 0:26:40of 12 million Taiwanese dollars to buy a croissant over the Internet.
0:26:40 > 0:26:41How did he do that?
0:26:41 > 0:26:43He pressed the button that said,
0:26:43 > 0:26:47"do you want to pay millions for this croissant, yes or no?"
0:26:47 > 0:26:50And he pressed the yes button.
0:26:50 > 0:26:55- It's probably only 25p. - It translates as £250,000?
0:26:55 > 0:26:58Dinner with David Cameron.
0:26:58 > 0:27:01It wasn't a Nigerian writing to him
0:27:01 > 0:27:05saying "Would you like one of our fine croissants?"
0:27:05 > 0:27:07"You have inherited a croissant."
0:27:07 > 0:27:12"Just pay us £250,000 and you can have this Nigerian croissant."
0:27:12 > 0:27:17- "Wow! I'd like that!"- "Your uncle, Greggs the Baker has died."
0:27:17 > 0:27:21He kept paying over and over again,
0:27:21 > 0:27:25after a number of phone calls asking for repayments from these scoundrels,
0:27:25 > 0:27:29before his bank details were used to fleece him out of cash.
0:27:29 > 0:27:31He ended up paying £250,000.
0:27:31 > 0:27:36He couldn't have paid £250,000. He couldn't have done.
0:27:36 > 0:27:42- Where would he get it from? - He's obviously a very rich man.
0:27:42 > 0:27:46How can anybody that stupid, unless he has inherited it...
0:27:46 > 0:27:52"I've £250,000, I ain't half hungry, I'll have one of them."
0:27:52 > 0:27:56The fact is, he never received his croissant.
0:27:56 > 0:27:59It just gets worse and worse.
0:27:59 > 0:28:04What was Asma Al-Assad trying to avoid paying the full price for?
0:28:04 > 0:28:09A croissant, 250 grand? I know where you can get it for half that.
0:28:09 > 0:28:13It was a Ming vase, costing £3,047.50.
0:28:13 > 0:28:16According to the Guardian, she sent details of the vase
0:28:16 > 0:28:18to the family's London-based fixer, Soulieman Marouf.
0:28:18 > 0:28:20He responded saying...
0:28:31 > 0:28:33Still, 15%, eh?
0:28:36 > 0:28:39Anthony Worrall Thompson was caught shoplifting from Tesco's.
0:28:39 > 0:28:40According to the Daily Mail, it was...
0:28:44 > 0:28:47The toughest set of ingredients on Ready Steady Cook.
0:28:49 > 0:28:53He also took wine and cheese. How did the Sun's headline writers respond?
0:28:53 > 0:28:56Ready, steady, crook! I could have been a journalist.
0:28:56 > 0:29:00- You could have been. - There's still time.
0:29:00 > 0:29:02Any more wine-and-cheesed-based punnery?
0:29:02 > 0:29:05Look what this bastard's stolen.
0:29:05 > 0:29:07They went for...
0:29:12 > 0:29:17We have talked about the passengers aboard the jet at Luton Airport,
0:29:17 > 0:29:18an unnamed Tony donor!
0:29:18 > 0:29:24- Tony donor?!- Tony Donor, I know him, Tony.
0:29:24 > 0:29:28The passenger who was an unnamed Tory donor,
0:29:28 > 0:29:31who frequently caught a helicopter to Luton Airport before zooming
0:29:31 > 0:29:36out of UK airspace in a private jet to avoid paying his full share of tax.
0:29:36 > 0:29:39Asma Al-Assad's parents were originally from Homs,
0:29:39 > 0:29:43the house they lived in is now commemorated with a large crater.
0:29:44 > 0:29:47Asma Al-Assad used to be an investment banker,
0:29:47 > 0:29:52one of the very few bankers to move on to something even more evil.
0:29:54 > 0:29:56Paul and Miles, here's yours.
0:29:56 > 0:30:01Harry Redknapp, Elisabeth Murdoch, Rebekah Brookes and Ned Kelly.
0:30:01 > 0:30:05Are these all candidates to be Arch Bishop of Canterbury?
0:30:05 > 0:30:07- Ned Kelly, what do we know about Ned Kelly?- Um...
0:30:07 > 0:30:12- His body was discovered last year. - Was it? Ah.- In a mass grave.
0:30:12 > 0:30:14- Not his head. - How did they know it was him, then?
0:30:14 > 0:30:18I don't know how they knew it was him. I think they were experts.
0:30:18 > 0:30:21- Oh, right, yeah.- I mean, that isn't something that's been...
0:30:21 > 0:30:25- None of the others have been found in unmarked graves.- No.
0:30:25 > 0:30:28It can't be that, can it? That would have been extraordinary.
0:30:28 > 0:30:31- It's something to do with a particular type of animal.- Dog.
0:30:31 > 0:30:34Oh, it's a horse, it's a horse. Rebekah Brooks had a horse
0:30:34 > 0:30:36that was lent to her by the Metropolitan Police.
0:30:36 > 0:30:39- Is it a horse?- It is a horse. - Right, OK. Um...
0:30:39 > 0:30:43Harry Readnopp... Harry Readnopp?
0:30:46 > 0:30:49- They're a popular big combo.- Right.
0:30:49 > 0:30:52Well, he was involved in a case about avoiding tax.
0:30:52 > 0:30:56And he'd set up an offshore account in the name of his dog.
0:30:56 > 0:30:58- Is that right?- That is right.
0:30:58 > 0:31:02- And the jury found him innocent. - They did.- Rightly.
0:31:04 > 0:31:07They've all been arrested, apart from Elisabeth Murdoch.
0:31:07 > 0:31:11Yes, if you throw in the horse bit of that, between you, you have the right answer.
0:31:11 > 0:31:14They've all been arrested for horse-related crimes.
0:31:14 > 0:31:17Apart from one of them, who hasn't.
0:31:17 > 0:31:18And did he steal...?
0:31:18 > 0:31:21He was a horse thief, she lent a horse
0:31:21 > 0:31:24and he opened an account in the name of a dog.
0:31:26 > 0:31:31- So the odd one out is? - Is...- Elisabeth.- Elisabeth Murdoch.
0:31:31 > 0:31:34Is the correct answer. She is the odd one out.
0:31:34 > 0:31:38They've all been accused of receiving a horse improperly.
0:31:38 > 0:31:39Oh, of course(!)
0:31:42 > 0:31:45What's the proper way to receive a horse?
0:31:45 > 0:31:48Apart from Elisabeth Murdoch who had her horse improperly taken away.
0:31:48 > 0:31:53- Anyone know by whom? - By her father.- Yes.
0:31:53 > 0:31:56Elisabeth Murdoch revealed in an interview with Tatler Magazine
0:31:56 > 0:31:58that as a young girl, she had a favourite pony
0:31:58 > 0:32:02and one day she went to nuzzle it only to find the animal had vanished.
0:32:02 > 0:32:04She then asked her father where it was and he said...
0:32:04 > 0:32:08GRUFF AUSTRALIAN ACCENT
0:32:12 > 0:32:13That's how she talks.
0:32:13 > 0:32:16How many News of the World readers have got accommodation for a pony?
0:32:16 > 0:32:19But he's been more generous to her since.
0:32:19 > 0:32:24- Yes, he bought her television company.- For?- A lot.
0:32:24 > 0:32:27£129 million.
0:32:27 > 0:32:29Fortunately, the flurry of revelations
0:32:29 > 0:32:34- about the scandalous behaviour at News International has died down now, hasn't it, Ian?- No.- Oh.
0:32:34 > 0:32:38There have been some people who say they've been hacked in America,
0:32:38 > 0:32:41which means the whole thing will start up again
0:32:41 > 0:32:44and the Americans are very, very cross about that sort of thing.
0:32:44 > 0:32:48- There was a whole file leaked on the internet, wasn't there?- Yeah.
0:32:48 > 0:32:51- That absolutely nobody will talk about.- What's it about?
0:32:51 > 0:32:54- I can't talk about it.- Can you not? - No. Well, I could.
0:32:54 > 0:32:58Could you explain some element to the story in some sort of charade form?
0:32:58 > 0:33:03It's just the same old... same old, same old.
0:33:03 > 0:33:07People doing things that they're not meant to do and hassling celebrities.
0:33:08 > 0:33:11- I see.- It'll come out. It'll come out at some point.
0:33:11 > 0:33:13GRACE LAUGHS
0:33:19 > 0:33:22Harry Redknapp received a horse from football agent Willie McKay -
0:33:22 > 0:33:27a gift that was investigated as part of the Stevens inquiry into corruption in football.
0:33:27 > 0:33:30How did Harry try and argue that the horse wasn't a bung?
0:33:30 > 0:33:33He said he didn't have a head for figures,
0:33:33 > 0:33:35it was a gift from a friend.
0:33:35 > 0:33:39The friend had put it in an offshore account in the name of his dog.
0:33:39 > 0:33:42What could be more innocent than that?
0:33:42 > 0:33:44Did he say it was a present for his child or something?
0:33:44 > 0:33:48He said it wasn't a bung because it was a useless horse.
0:33:49 > 0:33:53He told the inquiry it was possible he owned the horse,
0:33:53 > 0:33:57he did admit to that. Can anyone...? We've already talked about...
0:33:57 > 0:33:58Well... Er... Oh.
0:33:58 > 0:34:02Rebekah Brooks, when editor of The Sun in 2008,
0:34:02 > 0:34:04was apparently lent a horse by the Metropolitan Police.
0:34:04 > 0:34:06It was actually at a restaurant.
0:34:06 > 0:34:08She was offered a horse at a restaurant.
0:34:08 > 0:34:11I'm presuming a French restaurant.
0:34:13 > 0:34:16The horse, who was called Razor, who rode her?
0:34:16 > 0:34:19- The Prime Minister rode the horse. - Yes, David Cameron rode her.
0:34:19 > 0:34:22- Here he is admitting that he did in fact ride the horse.- Oh, right.
0:34:22 > 0:34:27Yes, I did go riding with him, he has a number of different horses,
0:34:27 > 0:34:30and, yes, one of them was this former police horse Razor,
0:34:30 > 0:34:32which I did ride.
0:34:32 > 0:34:35I'm very sorry to hear that Razor is no longer with us
0:34:35 > 0:34:38and I think I'll probably conclude by saying
0:34:38 > 0:34:42I don't think I'll be getting back into the saddle any time soon.
0:34:44 > 0:34:46Another good anecdote there from Dave.
0:34:48 > 0:34:53- Ned Kelly was an Australian outlaw. - Yeah. He was.- In 1871,
0:34:53 > 0:34:55he was sentenced to thee years hard labour
0:34:55 > 0:34:59for improperly receiving a stolen horse.
0:34:59 > 0:35:02Anyone know the name of Ned Kelly's first victim?
0:35:04 > 0:35:08A clue is he was a Chinese trader. His name was...
0:35:12 > 0:35:13Coincidentally.
0:35:13 > 0:35:14Were they also his dying words?
0:35:16 > 0:35:19They have all been accused of receiving a horse improperly,
0:35:19 > 0:35:23apart from Elisabeth Murdoch, who had her horse improperly taken away.
0:35:23 > 0:35:26After initially denying it, David Cameron admitted riding horses
0:35:26 > 0:35:28belonging to Rebekah and Charlie Brooks, saying...
0:35:31 > 0:35:35Just to be clear, Nick Clegg never rode the horse.
0:35:35 > 0:35:38He was too busy mucking out the stables.
0:35:38 > 0:35:41Harry Redknapp was unknowingly given a horse by his agent.
0:35:41 > 0:35:46He was also unknowingly given a pony and several monkeys.
0:35:48 > 0:35:52Harry Redknapp's horse looks good, runs well for most of the race
0:35:52 > 0:35:55then inexplicably fades and finishes behind Arsenal.
0:35:58 > 0:36:00Mick Jagger played the title role
0:36:00 > 0:36:03in the movie of Ned Kelly's short but turbulent life.
0:36:03 > 0:36:07Born in 1854, Mick is still touring.
0:36:08 > 0:36:12Time now for the missing words round, which, this week,
0:36:12 > 0:36:16features as its guest publication Raisin' Views -
0:36:16 > 0:36:18the voice of the raisin industry.
0:36:18 > 0:36:20I am a regular subscriber,
0:36:20 > 0:36:22as indeed are all of its subscribers.
0:36:26 > 0:36:27And we start with...
0:36:31 > 0:36:33Tom Jones?
0:36:35 > 0:36:37MILES: A state of indecision.
0:36:41 > 0:36:42The answer is...
0:36:46 > 0:36:49This is one of the many unusual calls
0:36:49 > 0:36:51revealed by the Leicester Fire Brigade,
0:36:51 > 0:36:55which also included a man who got his toe stuck in a bath tap after his wife said...
0:36:58 > 0:37:02Sadly, she was stuck in a wardrobe at the time so he didn't hear her.
0:37:03 > 0:37:04Next...
0:37:07 > 0:37:11I tell callers I'm lusty Lolita with the sexual desire of a panther
0:37:11 > 0:37:15but I'm actually John Major who used to be Prime Minister of this country.
0:37:17 > 0:37:19Is pretty much the right answer, yes.
0:37:28 > 0:37:32This is 55-year-old sex line worker Maureen Gardner.
0:37:32 > 0:37:34Here she is on the phone using her one good ear,
0:37:34 > 0:37:38after the accident she had last time someone phoned her up while she was doing the ironing.
0:37:38 > 0:37:39Next...
0:37:42 > 0:37:44I know this one.
0:37:44 > 0:37:48- They're actually highly intelligent. - Is absolutely the correct answer.
0:37:48 > 0:37:52A Swedish study has found that footballers are more intelligent than previously thought.
0:37:52 > 0:37:57As if to prove it, here's Burnley defender Clarke Carlisle appearing on Countdown.
0:37:57 > 0:37:58Somewhat less impressive
0:37:58 > 0:38:02when you realise the word he came up with was "go".
0:38:05 > 0:38:06Next...
0:38:08 > 0:38:11- And... - MILES: Immediately apologises.- Yes.
0:38:14 > 0:38:17Cabbie sneezes and takes wrong turn into canal.
0:38:17 > 0:38:19Is almost the right answer.
0:38:20 > 0:38:24This is a taxi driver, Mati Levy, who sneezed whilst driving
0:38:24 > 0:38:26and careered into a 15th century monument.
0:38:26 > 0:38:29The monument, in Cheddar, is now cordoned off,
0:38:29 > 0:38:33leaving heartbroken residents with nothing to piss against on their way home from the pub.
0:38:34 > 0:38:36Next...
0:38:39 > 0:38:41In all honesty,
0:38:41 > 0:38:44there's no chance we're ever going to get this, are we?
0:38:44 > 0:38:47Even showing it to us is an insult, really.
0:38:47 > 0:38:48Well, I think you'll kick yourself
0:38:48 > 0:38:50when you find out what the answer is.
0:38:50 > 0:38:53- Raisins, raisins and more raisins. - Is the right answer.- Whey!
0:38:53 > 0:38:55- APPLAUSE - Pretty much, pretty much.
0:39:03 > 0:39:05One speaker at the seminar
0:39:05 > 0:39:09was a member of the National Dried Fruit Trade Association.
0:39:11 > 0:39:13Well, that's dried fruit for you.
0:39:14 > 0:39:15And finally...
0:39:18 > 0:39:19Take your tights off.
0:39:21 > 0:39:22No, DO take your tights off.
0:39:24 > 0:39:26Don't keep your tights on!
0:39:26 > 0:39:29Don't use raisins as a contraceptive. They fall out.
0:39:31 > 0:39:33Well, the answer is...
0:39:37 > 0:39:41This is the news that the Edinburgh Zoo pandas are more prone to slap than tickle.
0:39:41 > 0:39:44Here is another panda, this time in the USA,
0:39:44 > 0:39:46behaving in an upsetting manner.
0:39:46 > 0:39:50CHILDREN: Purple panda!
0:39:50 > 0:39:53- Oh, is he coming?- Purple panda!
0:39:53 > 0:39:55There he is, look.
0:39:55 > 0:39:57Here's a panda. Hello, panda.
0:39:57 > 0:39:59CHILDREN WAIL
0:40:06 > 0:40:08He's just pre... Wait.
0:40:08 > 0:40:12CHILDREN CONTINUE TO WAIL
0:40:14 > 0:40:16Aren't children stupid?
0:40:19 > 0:40:21So the final scores are...
0:40:21 > 0:40:22Paul and Miles have seven points,
0:40:22 > 0:40:25but the winners this week are Ian and Grace with eight.
0:40:25 > 0:40:27Yes.
0:40:27 > 0:40:29APPLAUSE
0:40:34 > 0:40:39But before we go, there's just time for the caption competition.
0:40:45 > 0:40:47- AS BORIS:- Would you live in the Greater London area?
0:40:49 > 0:40:53And I'll leave you with the news that with the race to be Mayor of London hotting up,
0:40:53 > 0:40:57one of the candidates resorts to a Vladimir Putin style of campaigning.
0:41:01 > 0:41:04As Alan Titchmarsh's latest novel is turned into a movie,
0:41:04 > 0:41:06filming begins on the romantic love scene.
0:41:09 > 0:41:13And at a park in Barnsley, Prince Charles attends the unveiling of a statue
0:41:13 > 0:41:16commemorating Britain's finest prostate doctor.
0:41:20 > 0:41:21Good night.
0:41:21 > 0:41:24APPLAUSE
0:41:51 > 0:41:54Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd