0:00:00 > 0:00:02This programme contains strong language
0:00:02 > 0:00:04- You'd better get it out. - You dropped it!
0:00:06 > 0:00:09- I really need a piss. - Well, don't piss on it!
0:00:11 > 0:00:13- Are you gonna get it out or not? - I'm not touching it!
0:00:13 > 0:00:15Think of all the things I've done in there.
0:00:15 > 0:00:19This programme contains strong language
0:00:19 > 0:00:22How much would I have to pay you to eat it?
0:00:24 > 0:00:25Fuck it.
0:00:27 > 0:00:31- Oh, Becky!- What shall I do with it? - Don't put it near me. It's dripping!- Stop shouting!
0:00:31 > 0:00:34- Don't put it in the sink! - Oh, for God's sake! - HE GASPS
0:00:35 > 0:00:38I'm never having a bath, ever again!
0:00:38 > 0:00:40Cos you're always having baths, aren't you(?)
0:00:48 > 0:00:49Do you want some water?
0:00:49 > 0:00:51URINE TRICKLES
0:00:53 > 0:00:55- TRICKLING STOPS - Steve?
0:00:55 > 0:00:57I can't wee and talk at the same time.
0:00:59 > 0:01:01Make sure it all goes in the loo.
0:01:17 > 0:01:19- URINE TRICKLES - Eugh!
0:01:26 > 0:01:28You know, one of the perks of living with you
0:01:28 > 0:01:31is every time I need the toilet, I get to tread in your wee.
0:01:35 > 0:01:38TOILET FLUSHES
0:01:38 > 0:01:42- You planned saying that, didn't you?- Yep.
0:01:44 > 0:01:47- Does Laura know we're getting up early?- Yeah, I told her.
0:01:49 > 0:01:50You all right?
0:01:50 > 0:01:51Yeah.
0:01:53 > 0:01:56You're putting toothpaste on your head.
0:01:56 > 0:01:59I've got a spot coming. It dries the skin out.
0:02:00 > 0:02:01Of course it does.
0:02:12 > 0:02:14What are we gonna do if one of us dies?
0:02:14 > 0:02:16We're not gonna die.
0:02:26 > 0:02:27HE SIGHS
0:02:33 > 0:02:35We look a bit like each other.
0:02:35 > 0:02:36Fuck off!
0:02:40 > 0:02:43HE GROWLS PLAYFULLY
0:02:43 > 0:02:45Steve!
0:02:48 > 0:02:51Do you think you'd be upset if Laura died?
0:02:53 > 0:02:54No, but if she died,
0:02:54 > 0:02:59- do you think you'd feel genuinely sad, or start to feel better after an hour or so?- Steve.
0:02:59 > 0:03:00- What?- She's my sister.
0:03:02 > 0:03:04(I think I'd probably like her more if she was dead.)
0:03:04 > 0:03:06That's better.
0:03:08 > 0:03:12Oh, Laura was such a nice person.
0:03:12 > 0:03:16She was really intelligent, she said such interesting things.
0:03:16 > 0:03:18I miss her so much!
0:03:18 > 0:03:21- Why couldn't they take me instead? - KNOCK AT DOOR
0:03:21 > 0:03:23Becks, I really need my poo now.
0:03:23 > 0:03:25OK, Laur. We're nearly done.
0:03:28 > 0:03:31No-one needs a poo this time of night.
0:03:36 > 0:03:37OK, Steve.
0:03:40 > 0:03:42Was that an impression of my mum?
0:03:42 > 0:03:45- Becks, the loo roll's wet! - Have a look in the cupboard.
0:03:48 > 0:03:50Fine, I'll do impressions of your mum, then.
0:03:50 > 0:03:52- (AS STEVE'S MUM)- OK, Steve.
0:03:52 > 0:03:54(HIGH-PITCHED VOICE) I'm a silly little bitch
0:03:54 > 0:03:56and my husband basically walks all over me
0:03:56 > 0:03:59and I've got a shit sense of humour
0:03:59 > 0:04:01and I go to church. LAURA FARTS, GRUNTS
0:04:02 > 0:04:03Wow.
0:04:04 > 0:04:08- It's no worse than what you said. - Bloody hell!
0:04:14 > 0:04:17Paul, mate, are you gonna put some clothes on?
0:04:17 > 0:04:21- HE GRUNTS - I wanna sleep with my knob out.
0:04:22 > 0:04:24HE CLEARS THROAT OK.
0:04:26 > 0:04:30- Shell, can you move your head? - SHE MUMBLES
0:04:30 > 0:04:31Shell!
0:04:34 > 0:04:37Can you move your head, Shelly? I need to get an egg.
0:04:37 > 0:04:39SHE WHIMPERS
0:04:56 > 0:04:59Come on, mate. Put your pants back on.
0:04:59 > 0:05:02Are you gonna make that bitch clean her fucking teeth?
0:05:02 > 0:05:04Just put something on, yeah?
0:05:04 > 0:05:06In the morning her breath's like cat shit.
0:05:06 > 0:05:09YOU STINK OF CAT SHIT!
0:05:09 > 0:05:10Put your clothes on, Paul.
0:05:10 > 0:05:13She kisses me in the morning.
0:05:13 > 0:05:17It's like kissing a...a fucking litter tray!
0:05:17 > 0:05:19Paul!
0:05:19 > 0:05:22Stop shouting, Paul. You're causing a disturbance.
0:05:22 > 0:05:23Come on, mate.
0:05:23 > 0:05:25- Did I tell you about Karleshia, Becks?- Yeah.
0:05:25 > 0:05:29- She's the one whose job I'm overtaking.- Yeah, you said.
0:05:29 > 0:05:30It's like a fairy story.
0:05:30 > 0:05:33One minute she's on the perfume counter at Boots,
0:05:33 > 0:05:36- the next minute, she's on X Factor. - You said, Laur.
0:05:36 > 0:05:39They put her through to Bootcamp, but she didn't make the finals cos it's fixed.
0:05:40 > 0:05:41Karleshia?
0:05:41 > 0:05:46All I'm saying is, everything happens for a reason and you make your own luck.
0:05:46 > 0:05:49Hm, Laura, you've got toothpaste on your cheek.
0:05:49 > 0:05:51I've got a spot coming, Steve.
0:05:51 > 0:05:53It dries the skin out.
0:05:54 > 0:05:58Well, you both look absolutely lovely.
0:05:58 > 0:05:59Eugh, Becky!
0:06:06 > 0:06:09You'll be the ones with the hangovers.
0:06:11 > 0:06:13Julie Taylor said you get talent spotters
0:06:13 > 0:06:16hanging round the perfume counter looking for the next Jordan.
0:06:16 > 0:06:18Yes, I know, Laur. You were telling us in the pub.
0:06:18 > 0:06:19I mean, I know I'll never be a WAG,
0:06:19 > 0:06:22but there's plenty of other things you can do -
0:06:22 > 0:06:24be a trendsetter, or a famous novelist.
0:06:24 > 0:06:27You OK to go to sleep now, Laur? We're getting up early, remember?
0:06:27 > 0:06:29Well, sorry, everyone. I thought this was meant to be a sleepover
0:06:29 > 0:06:32to celebrate my new career, but obviously I've become mistaken.
0:06:32 > 0:06:34It's not a sleepover. You missed your bus.
0:06:34 > 0:06:36You'll know this, Steve.
0:06:36 > 0:06:39When Julie Taylor goes to sleep, she's completely nude.
0:06:39 > 0:06:41OK, Laura.
0:06:41 > 0:06:43She wears nothing, not a stitch.
0:06:43 > 0:06:47She's completely and utterly nude apart from a pair of wax earplugs.
0:06:47 > 0:06:49OK, that's enough about Julie Taylor, Laura.
0:06:49 > 0:06:51Don't worry, Becks. She's not interested in Steve.
0:06:51 > 0:06:53She's shagging a Chinaman.
0:06:53 > 0:06:54Laura!
0:06:54 > 0:06:56OK, fine, I'll keep myself to myself.
0:06:59 > 0:07:01Good night, everyone.
0:07:01 > 0:07:02- Good night, Laura. - Good night, Laura.
0:07:02 > 0:07:04Good night, Paul.
0:07:04 > 0:07:06Have you taken your pill?
0:07:06 > 0:07:07Yes, Paul.
0:07:26 > 0:07:27I love you.
0:07:27 > 0:07:29HE GRUNTS
0:07:30 > 0:07:31I love you, Paul,
0:07:31 > 0:07:34with all my heart.
0:07:34 > 0:07:36Sweet dreams, everyone.
0:07:39 > 0:07:41Sweet dreams, everyone.
0:07:41 > 0:07:43- Sweet dreams, Laura. - Sweet dreams, Laura.
0:07:45 > 0:07:47May all your wishes come true.
0:08:00 > 0:08:03- I haven't got any! - Nor have I!
0:08:05 > 0:08:07Oh, the zip's in my face.
0:08:19 > 0:08:24FAINT DRIPPING
0:08:41 > 0:08:43Becks?
0:08:54 > 0:08:57Becks, I think there's a drip.
0:09:01 > 0:09:04There's definitely a drip, Becks.
0:09:04 > 0:09:06- Steve, sort it out. - You sort it out.
0:09:06 > 0:09:08- I'm all comfy. - So am I.
0:09:11 > 0:09:13Maybe it's just me,
0:09:13 > 0:09:17but that sounds like blood dripping from the wounds of a ghost.
0:09:20 > 0:09:23- Brilliant. I need another wee. - Don't tread on me, Steve.
0:09:23 > 0:09:26I'm not gonna tread on you.
0:09:26 > 0:09:27Put the light on if you're weeing.
0:09:27 > 0:09:30I saw another ghost on Tuesday.
0:09:30 > 0:09:32Me and Paul wanted to contact the dead, or the living dead,
0:09:32 > 0:09:34and find out what they know,
0:09:34 > 0:09:38so we went to this seance from a leaflet Paul got, and we came home
0:09:38 > 0:09:40- and I was being sick... - URINE TRICKLES
0:09:40 > 0:09:46..and I looked in the mirror and there was this presence hovering behind me.
0:09:46 > 0:09:49- DRIPPING INCREASES - She was 12 and a half,
0:09:49 > 0:09:53she was from the Dark Ages and she was covered
0:09:53 > 0:09:56- from head to toe... - DRIPPING CONTINUES
0:09:56 > 0:09:58- PLASTIC BOTTLES CLATTER - ..in animal blood.
0:10:00 > 0:10:03I think she wanted revenge on whoever it was that covered her in animal blood.
0:10:03 > 0:10:06- TOILET FLUSHES - That's what it's like being a ghost.
0:10:06 > 0:10:08You bear a grudge.
0:10:08 > 0:10:09And the devil doesn't help -
0:10:09 > 0:10:13winding them up, chipping away at their self-esteem.
0:10:13 > 0:10:16Did it all go in the toilet?
0:10:16 > 0:10:19Yeah. Can we go to sleep, Laura?
0:10:19 > 0:10:21You didn't see a ghost.
0:10:21 > 0:10:23They don't exist.
0:10:23 > 0:10:25They do exist, Steve. I've seen four.
0:10:25 > 0:10:28- And at the seance we spoke to Elvis.- All right, Laura.
0:10:28 > 0:10:32Elvis didn't say much, but what he did say was fucking terrifying.
0:10:32 > 0:10:35(YAWNING) Oh, Paul, please!
0:10:35 > 0:10:37I've got a sixth sense for it. Danny told me.
0:10:37 > 0:10:40He's the wizard that did the seance.
0:10:40 > 0:10:45I've got all the normal five senses - seeing, hearing, thinking and touch -
0:10:45 > 0:10:48but I've also got a sixth sense - ghosts.
0:10:48 > 0:10:52- Oh, my God!- OK, that's enough about ghosts, Laura.
0:10:52 > 0:10:55Let's get some sleep.
0:10:55 > 0:10:57We've got a very big day tomorrow, we're getting up very early.
0:10:57 > 0:10:58OK.
0:10:58 > 0:11:00Good night, everyone.
0:11:00 > 0:11:02Sweet dreams, Paul.
0:11:04 > 0:11:06And may all your wishes come true.
0:11:21 > 0:11:24Paul and I are thinking of going to Spain for a week.
0:11:35 > 0:11:37SHE SIGHS
0:12:02 > 0:12:04TINNY MUSIC FROM EARPHONES
0:12:09 > 0:12:11HE SIGHS Laura!
0:12:11 > 0:12:14Turn your iPod off!
0:12:14 > 0:12:17- SHE SIGHS - God, it's like living in a concentration camp!
0:12:27 > 0:12:29DAN: Steve?
0:12:29 > 0:12:31- BECKY SIGHS - Steve.
0:12:31 > 0:12:34I think there's someone at the door, everybody.
0:12:34 > 0:12:36- Steve? - Get rid of him.
0:12:36 > 0:12:41Are you awake, Steve? I think I heard your voice.
0:12:41 > 0:12:43- KNOCKING AT DOOR - Steve!
0:12:43 > 0:12:45- KNOCKING CONTINUES - Steve, Steve.
0:12:45 > 0:12:47Brilliant(!)
0:12:47 > 0:12:48Don't tread on me.
0:12:48 > 0:12:51How can I tread on you?! You're on the sofa!
0:12:53 > 0:12:55- KNOCKING CONTINUES - So, at this seance,
0:12:55 > 0:12:59Paul spoke to Roy, the scuzzy old man that used to look after him.
0:12:59 > 0:13:02He wasn't scuzzy. He was my friend.
0:13:07 > 0:13:09All right, Steve.
0:13:09 > 0:13:11- Dan, it's really late. - Yeah, sorry.
0:13:11 > 0:13:14I was just passing, thought I'd pop in, see if you're OK.
0:13:14 > 0:13:16Yep, I'm fine, thanks.
0:13:16 > 0:13:19Good, good.
0:13:19 > 0:13:21OK, well, thanks for checking up...
0:13:21 > 0:13:23Me and Anita split up.
0:13:25 > 0:13:26Yeah.
0:13:28 > 0:13:30- Sorry, mate. - Yeah.
0:13:32 > 0:13:34Well, I'm sure it'll work itself out. It has before.
0:13:34 > 0:13:37- Not this time, Steve. - OK.
0:13:38 > 0:13:40I've been crying on a bench.
0:13:40 > 0:13:43I got hit by a boy.
0:13:43 > 0:13:46Oh, bloody hell!
0:13:47 > 0:13:48He took my wallet.
0:13:50 > 0:13:52There's nothing in it. I don't know why I carry it round with me.
0:13:54 > 0:13:57OK, well, Dan, it's gone one.
0:13:57 > 0:14:00We've actually got Laura, Paul and Shelly staying,
0:14:00 > 0:14:03and me and Becky have got a really big day ahead of us tomorrow.
0:14:03 > 0:14:06We're watching a whole series of 24 in 24 hours,
0:14:06 > 0:14:08it's gonna be pretty exhausting, so why don't you...?
0:14:08 > 0:14:10Don't make me be alone tonight.
0:14:11 > 0:14:12Don't.
0:14:14 > 0:14:17Look at me, I've got nothing.
0:14:17 > 0:14:18I can't be alone tonight.
0:14:18 > 0:14:21I won't cause any bother.
0:14:21 > 0:14:22I know.
0:14:22 > 0:14:25I'll kip in the bath if you want, I don't mind.
0:14:25 > 0:14:27I won't come in the bedroom.
0:14:27 > 0:14:29You don't have to talk to me.
0:14:29 > 0:14:30I know, but...
0:14:30 > 0:14:32You won't even know I'm here.
0:14:33 > 0:14:36But I can't go up there tonight.
0:14:37 > 0:14:39Some really dreadful things have happened.
0:14:39 > 0:14:42Mm-hm, I know, but there's no space...
0:14:42 > 0:14:44She fucked her uncle, Steve.
0:14:46 > 0:14:48Sorry?
0:14:48 > 0:14:49Anita.
0:14:49 > 0:14:51She fucked her uncle. That's why we split up.
0:14:54 > 0:14:55She fucked her uncle?!
0:14:55 > 0:14:56Keep your voice down!
0:14:57 > 0:14:59What, as in her auntie's husband?
0:14:59 > 0:15:00Her dad's brother.
0:15:00 > 0:15:03Should've seen it coming.
0:15:07 > 0:15:08I don't know what to say.
0:15:08 > 0:15:10There's nothing to say.
0:15:10 > 0:15:15It was her nan's birthday, they had a barbeque, one thing led to another
0:15:15 > 0:15:18and she ended up fucking her uncle in the shed.
0:15:20 > 0:15:22You'd better come in.
0:15:23 > 0:15:26- Is anyone in the inflatable chair? - No.
0:15:26 > 0:15:27Excellent.
0:15:34 > 0:15:36STEVE CLEARS HIS THROAT
0:15:36 > 0:15:40Everyone. Dan's had a, um...
0:15:40 > 0:15:43He's had a bit of bad news, so he's gonna be joining us for the night.
0:15:45 > 0:15:46What's happened?
0:15:46 > 0:15:48Me and Anita split up.
0:15:48 > 0:15:50Oh, no! Sorry, Dan.
0:15:50 > 0:15:52Sorry to hear that, Dan.
0:15:52 > 0:15:53Yeah, thanks.
0:15:53 > 0:15:55MUMBLES SLEEPILY
0:15:55 > 0:15:56Thanks, Paul.
0:15:56 > 0:15:58What happened?
0:15:58 > 0:16:04Just didn't sort of see eye to eye... on a matter concerning her uncle.
0:16:05 > 0:16:07Then later on, I got hit with a brick.
0:16:07 > 0:16:08A brick?!
0:16:12 > 0:16:14Oh, bloody hell!
0:16:16 > 0:16:18I might get something cold for my head.
0:16:28 > 0:16:30How could I say no?
0:16:30 > 0:16:33You're not really gonna let him stay, are you, Steve?
0:16:33 > 0:16:34I'm not gonna kick him out. He's sad.
0:16:34 > 0:16:36What if I wake up and find him licking me?
0:16:36 > 0:16:38- He's not gonna lick you, Laura.- He might.
0:16:38 > 0:16:40He's not going to lick you.
0:16:40 > 0:16:41I can't believe you're letting him sleep here.
0:16:41 > 0:16:43There's already four of us.
0:16:43 > 0:16:45- What if we run out of air? - Well, then I'll open a window.
0:16:45 > 0:16:47- What if he's sick on me? - Why would he be sick on you?
0:16:47 > 0:16:50Laura, he's not gonna lick you and he's not gonna be sick on you
0:16:50 > 0:16:52and we're not gonna run out of air, I promise.
0:16:52 > 0:16:54OK, well, don't say I didn't warn you.
0:16:54 > 0:16:56My God! Look, he's just having a really bad time
0:16:56 > 0:16:58- and needs a bit of company. - Steve...
0:16:58 > 0:17:00He's going to sleep and he's not gonna bother anyone,
0:17:00 > 0:17:02so just, please, just...just leave him alone!
0:17:02 > 0:17:04Well, all I'm saying is, I can't sleep
0:17:04 > 0:17:05- if he's gonna be in here. - Yes, you can, Laura.
0:17:05 > 0:17:07I can't, Becks.
0:17:07 > 0:17:10So, I'm gonna use this opportunity to get on with a bit of admin.
0:17:10 > 0:17:12Now, Steve, about the wedding.
0:17:12 > 0:17:15Oh, Laura, please! Fuck's sake!
0:17:15 > 0:17:18We're gonna buy some birds, tie ribbons to their beaks
0:17:18 > 0:17:21and fly them round the church while we make our vows.
0:17:23 > 0:17:24- Are you joking? - No, Steve.
0:17:24 > 0:17:25I have a number for an aviary.
0:17:25 > 0:17:28Now, as best man, you'll be in charge of feeding them.
0:17:28 > 0:17:31Do you know what, Laura? We've got people spread all over our flat,
0:17:31 > 0:17:33I'm tired, every time I close my eyes,
0:17:33 > 0:17:35I see a ghost covered in animal blood.
0:17:35 > 0:17:37- SHE LAUGHS - Do you?- Yes.
0:17:37 > 0:17:39I've got a whole day of watching 24 ahead of me.
0:17:39 > 0:17:42It's going to be so draining!
0:17:42 > 0:17:45So, right now I couldn't give a flying fuck
0:17:45 > 0:17:48about your wedding, which you haven't even set a date for!
0:17:50 > 0:17:51Good night.
0:17:53 > 0:17:54PAUL CHUCKLES
0:18:08 > 0:18:10I can see what Shelly means now.
0:18:10 > 0:18:13- Laura, go to sleep. - Yes, I will.
0:18:13 > 0:18:15But I'm just saying, Becks, I can understand now
0:18:15 > 0:18:18some of the things Shelly was saying tonight about Steve.
0:18:18 > 0:18:20OK, enough, Laura.
0:18:26 > 0:18:28Well, what does that mean? What did Shelly say about me?
0:18:28 > 0:18:30She said she doesn't like you.
0:18:30 > 0:18:33Yeah, good one. Thanks, Laura.
0:18:35 > 0:18:36As if!
0:18:36 > 0:18:39It's nothing personal, but from the moment she laid eyes on you,
0:18:39 > 0:18:42- she's hated your guts. - Oh, as if, Laura!
0:18:42 > 0:18:44She thinks I'm funny, doesn't she, Becks?
0:18:49 > 0:18:50Becks?
0:18:50 > 0:18:54I think she doesn't really...get you?
0:18:58 > 0:18:59What does that mean?!
0:19:00 > 0:19:01Becky.
0:19:01 > 0:19:05It doesn't mean anything. Just get Dan and let's go to sleep.
0:19:05 > 0:19:07What do you mean, she doesn't get me? What is there to get?
0:19:07 > 0:19:10Sometimes when you get a bit drunk, you do silly things.
0:19:10 > 0:19:12I think it's funny and everyone else thinks it's funny
0:19:12 > 0:19:15but sometimes Shelly just can't understand.
0:19:15 > 0:19:18- Shelly's like that.- She thinks you might be deranged.
0:19:18 > 0:19:20I'm just having a laugh!
0:19:20 > 0:19:23Well, the truth is, Steve, she's terrified of you.
0:19:23 > 0:19:26No, she's not! Why would anyone be scared of me?!
0:19:26 > 0:19:29OK, name two things Shelly doesn't like about me.
0:19:29 > 0:19:31- She thinks you're lazy. - HE SCOFFS As if!
0:19:31 > 0:19:33She finds you physically repulsive.
0:19:33 > 0:19:36- Laura! - And on the way home,
0:19:36 > 0:19:38she said you were sexually intimidating.
0:19:38 > 0:19:39- When? - In the kebab shop.
0:19:39 > 0:19:41She thought you were gonna rape her.
0:19:41 > 0:19:44What?! I'd never rape anyone,
0:19:44 > 0:19:45- would I, Becks? - No, Steve.
0:19:45 > 0:19:47You'd never rape anyone.
0:19:47 > 0:19:48And if I was gonna rape someone,
0:19:48 > 0:19:51I certainly wouldn't do it in a kebab shop.
0:19:52 > 0:19:53I wouldn't do it anywhere.
0:19:53 > 0:19:56Look, Shelly likes me. We were having a laugh tonight.
0:19:56 > 0:19:57She liked my impression of an earthworm.
0:19:57 > 0:19:58No, she didn't.
0:19:58 > 0:20:01No-one did. She said you had wandering eyes.
0:20:01 > 0:20:04I did not have wandering eyes!
0:20:04 > 0:20:06Oh, why have you stood up?
0:20:06 > 0:20:09The...
0:20:09 > 0:20:11They're not my wandering eyes,
0:20:11 > 0:20:15they're the wandering eyes of a sexually intimidating earthworm.
0:20:15 > 0:20:17Oh, look, you've completely missed the point
0:20:17 > 0:20:18of my impression of an earthworm.
0:20:18 > 0:20:20Steve. You're an adult,
0:20:20 > 0:20:24you have an impression of an earthworm and you did it in a kebab shop.
0:20:24 > 0:20:26She's bound to think you're weird.
0:20:26 > 0:20:29Now, turn the light off and go to sleep.
0:20:32 > 0:20:33Oh...
0:20:33 > 0:20:34Oh, bloody hell!
0:20:42 > 0:20:43This is ridiculous.
0:20:45 > 0:20:47I've never had someone dislike me before.
0:20:51 > 0:20:53Well, that's bollocks.
0:20:53 > 0:20:55What do you mean, that's bollocks?
0:20:55 > 0:20:58What do you mean, you've never had someone dislike you before?
0:20:58 > 0:21:01No-one dislikes me. I'm nice, I'm a nice bloke.
0:21:01 > 0:21:04- I smile at people... - Dan!
0:21:05 > 0:21:07Sorry.
0:21:07 > 0:21:08Sorry for waking you.
0:21:08 > 0:21:11- Are you OK? - Not really.
0:21:11 > 0:21:13Me and Anita split up
0:21:13 > 0:21:15and a ten-year-old bashed my head in.
0:21:17 > 0:21:19I don't feel great, if I'm honest, Shelly.
0:21:19 > 0:21:21I think you're great, Dan.
0:21:21 > 0:21:24I think you're really lovely.
0:21:27 > 0:21:28Go on.
0:21:28 > 0:21:31I wouldn't change a thing about you.
0:21:33 > 0:21:34What about my face?
0:21:36 > 0:21:37Or my body?
0:21:38 > 0:21:41I think you're a wonderful human being.
0:21:41 > 0:21:45You're a perfect gentleman. I wouldn't change a thing.
0:21:48 > 0:21:50Oh, don't go to sleep.
0:21:51 > 0:21:53Shelly, say something else.
0:21:53 > 0:21:55Shelly?
0:21:56 > 0:21:58SHELLY!
0:21:58 > 0:21:59What about Jamie?
0:21:59 > 0:22:00- He hates you. - Yeah, well?
0:22:00 > 0:22:02I hate him.
0:22:02 > 0:22:05Some of the boys me and Shelly used to work with, they didn't like you.
0:22:07 > 0:22:09I've never met them!
0:22:09 > 0:22:11Hayley, Kelly, Rebecca.
0:22:11 > 0:22:12They think you're a twat.
0:22:12 > 0:22:14No, they don't!
0:22:14 > 0:22:16You told them you worked for Formula One.
0:22:16 > 0:22:18HE LAUGHS Oh, come on, that was funny!
0:22:18 > 0:22:21All my mates think you're a pussy.
0:22:21 > 0:22:24No-one likes you, Steve, because you've got wandering eyes.
0:22:24 > 0:22:28They are not my wandering eyes.
0:22:28 > 0:22:31They are the wandering eyes of an earthworm.
0:22:34 > 0:22:37- Oh, bloody earthworm. - No,
0:22:37 > 0:22:40I can't hold it in, Becks. I'm gonna have to do another wee-wee.
0:22:46 > 0:22:49- Dan? - Sorry.
0:22:51 > 0:22:53You OK?
0:22:53 > 0:22:54Yeah. You?
0:22:54 > 0:22:55Yeah.
0:22:59 > 0:23:03I did my earthworm in a kebab shop and it went down wrong.
0:23:03 > 0:23:06Bad luck, mate. Do you wanna do it now and I'll laugh?
0:23:09 > 0:23:11No, you're all right.
0:23:11 > 0:23:12Can I try one?
0:23:19 > 0:23:21Let's get some sleep, eh?
0:23:21 > 0:23:22Yeah.
0:23:22 > 0:23:25Yeah, I'll just finish this.
0:23:26 > 0:23:28No, don't eat that, mate.
0:23:28 > 0:23:32No, come on, come on. Come on, don't eat that.
0:23:34 > 0:23:35Oi, Becky.
0:23:35 > 0:23:36Come here and fuck me.
0:23:36 > 0:23:39For God's sake!
0:23:39 > 0:23:43It's really nice. Do you want some? It's frozen sweet corn.
0:23:43 > 0:23:46You can have them in the summer instead of popcorn.
0:23:46 > 0:23:47You coming to bed?
0:23:48 > 0:23:52You've, um...you've got something on your face, Becky.
0:23:52 > 0:23:54Yeah, it's toothpaste.
0:23:54 > 0:23:56Oh, right.
0:23:56 > 0:23:57Looks nice.
0:24:02 > 0:24:05Oh, come on.
0:24:06 > 0:24:08We need our sleep for 24.
0:24:10 > 0:24:12I think the toilet's leaking, Becks.
0:24:12 > 0:24:15There's wet all over the floor in there.
0:24:15 > 0:24:17OK, thanks, Laura.
0:24:19 > 0:24:21I thought it all went in!
0:24:21 > 0:24:24- SHE SNORTS - You're a delight to live with, do you know that?
0:24:24 > 0:24:26Hey!
0:24:28 > 0:24:30You still like me, don't you?
0:24:30 > 0:24:32Yeah, loads. Love you to bits.
0:24:32 > 0:24:33No, but...
0:24:33 > 0:24:35You're glad you moved in with me.
0:24:35 > 0:24:37Yes, it's been fantastic, come on!
0:24:37 > 0:24:39No, I know, but, I'm-I'm cool. Aren't I?
0:24:39 > 0:24:41I'm a cool kind of guy to live with.
0:24:41 > 0:24:43Mm, yeah, really cool. I mean, look at you now.
0:24:43 > 0:24:44Becky!
0:24:44 > 0:24:48It's not nice when you find out someone doesn't like you.
0:24:48 > 0:24:51Oh, come on, it's just Laura winding you up.
0:24:51 > 0:24:53And anyway, you've got me.
0:24:53 > 0:24:56Who gives a fuck what anyone else thinks?
0:25:05 > 0:25:07Night, Shell.
0:25:11 > 0:25:12SNORING
0:25:12 > 0:25:14Oh, you have gotta be joking.
0:25:14 > 0:25:15Steve, will you shut Dan up?
0:25:15 > 0:25:17Why are you in my bed?
0:25:17 > 0:25:20Paul's my fiance, Steve. I think I'm allowed to sleep next to him.
0:25:20 > 0:25:23- Laura, you're in our bed, though. - I know, Becks.
0:25:23 > 0:25:24Can you shut Dan up?
0:25:24 > 0:25:26I'm trying to sleep.
0:25:27 > 0:25:29Dan!
0:25:29 > 0:25:30Stop snoring!
0:25:30 > 0:25:32SNORING STOPS
0:25:34 > 0:25:36ENORMOUS SNORE
0:25:36 > 0:25:38Oh, put your finger under his nose.
0:25:38 > 0:25:40I'm not touching his nose!
0:25:40 > 0:25:42I read somewhere that the best way to stop someone snoring
0:25:42 > 0:25:44is to put a goose in the room.
0:25:44 > 0:25:46Oh, OK, I'll do that, then(!)
0:25:46 > 0:25:49Put your finger under his nose! It'll stop him snoring.
0:25:49 > 0:25:51Are you thinking of sneezing?
0:25:51 > 0:25:52No.
0:25:52 > 0:25:56When someone's snoring, you put a finger under his no...
0:25:56 > 0:25:59Oh, yeah. Yeah, I'm thinking of sneezing.
0:25:59 > 0:26:01Hit him, Steve. Punch him in the face.
0:26:01 > 0:26:04I'm not...! I'm not gonna punch him in the face!
0:26:04 > 0:26:05Will you get out of our bed?!
0:26:05 > 0:26:07SHE SIGHS
0:26:07 > 0:26:09There's room for one more in here, Becks.
0:26:09 > 0:26:11Come on. In you come.
0:26:11 > 0:26:12Snuggle up next to me.
0:26:19 > 0:26:22That's it, in you come.
0:26:22 > 0:26:23Snuggle up, snuggle up, Becks.
0:26:23 > 0:26:24That's it.
0:26:24 > 0:26:26How is this fair?
0:26:26 > 0:26:32That's it. Oh, this is nice, isn't it? It's like when we were kiddies.
0:26:32 > 0:26:35# Come closer and cuddle me tight... #
0:26:35 > 0:26:38- Oh, careful though, Becks. Paul's got a hard-on.- Eurgh!
0:26:38 > 0:26:40# My heart goes boom bang-a-bang
0:26:40 > 0:26:43# Boom bang-a-bang when you are near
0:26:43 > 0:26:46# Boom bang-a-bang bang all the time
0:26:46 > 0:26:50# It's such a lovely feeling
0:26:50 > 0:26:55# When I'm in your arms
0:26:55 > 0:26:58# Don't go away, I wanna stay My whole life through
0:26:58 > 0:27:00# Boom bang-a-bang-bang Close to you. #