The Ring

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0:00:02 > 0:00:06This programme contains strong language.

0:00:06 > 0:00:07Are you a lunatic?

0:00:10 > 0:00:13- All right, Dan?- I've moved in. - Congratulations.

0:00:13 > 0:00:16- It's a little something to welcome Becky to her new home.- Thanks.

0:00:16 > 0:00:18Paul's asked me to be his best man.

0:00:18 > 0:00:20But you don't even like each other.

0:00:20 > 0:00:22Yes we, do.

0:00:25 > 0:00:27You taken your pill?

0:00:27 > 0:00:28Yes, Paul.

0:00:36 > 0:00:37I think you're great, Dan.

0:00:37 > 0:00:39Go on.

0:00:39 > 0:00:41I think you're a wonderful human being.

0:00:41 > 0:00:44Don't speak like that to me.

0:00:44 > 0:00:46I'll speak to you how I like Paul, I'm pregnant.

0:00:48 > 0:00:51I hate everyone.

0:00:51 > 0:00:52HE BURPS

0:00:54 > 0:00:56Rogan josh?

0:00:57 > 0:00:59Very good.

0:01:07 > 0:01:09Do you want some crisps?

0:01:09 > 0:01:10No.

0:01:19 > 0:01:21They're beef.

0:01:21 > 0:01:22Urgh.

0:01:25 > 0:01:27They were half price. He had them by the till.

0:01:29 > 0:01:31Can you get me a water?

0:01:31 > 0:01:33Yep. I'll just get it. I'll see you in a minute.

0:01:48 > 0:01:51I know you're still in here. I can hear you eating.

0:02:02 > 0:02:04Steve.

0:02:04 > 0:02:05Will you get them out?

0:02:05 > 0:02:07No.

0:02:07 > 0:02:09Can I get them out?

0:02:09 > 0:02:11Can you please get me some water?

0:02:11 > 0:02:13I'm going to be sick.

0:02:16 > 0:02:17That's got bubbles in it.

0:02:33 > 0:02:36What've I missed? Has anyone died?

0:02:36 > 0:02:38I don't care.

0:02:38 > 0:02:39I want water.

0:02:56 > 0:02:57Becks!

0:02:58 > 0:03:01What's been happening in Doctors?

0:03:05 > 0:03:07Becks!

0:03:08 > 0:03:09Oh, shit!

0:03:14 > 0:03:18SHE WRETCHES AND COUGHS

0:03:41 > 0:03:44TOILET FLUSHES

0:03:56 > 0:03:57You OK in there?

0:04:06 > 0:04:07It came out my nose.

0:04:07 > 0:04:09Urgh!

0:04:10 > 0:04:12What was it like?

0:04:12 > 0:04:13Porridge.

0:04:13 > 0:04:15Nice.

0:04:15 > 0:04:16Feeling better?

0:04:16 > 0:04:17Yeah.

0:04:17 > 0:04:19Good.

0:04:19 > 0:04:20Probably leave it a bit.

0:04:20 > 0:04:22Yeah.

0:04:22 > 0:04:24God, you should've seen me on my 21st.

0:04:24 > 0:04:26Yeah. You've said.

0:04:26 > 0:04:27We'd been drinking all day

0:04:27 > 0:04:30and I was just pissed of my face cos we'd been drinking since one.

0:04:30 > 0:04:32I know! I remember you saying.

0:04:32 > 0:04:35And I went off from everyone else for some unknown reason

0:04:35 > 0:04:39and they found me like an hour later in that bit behind Paddy Power

0:04:39 > 0:04:41lying naked in the bins!

0:04:41 > 0:04:42Or by them.

0:04:42 > 0:04:44Yeah! I remember you saying.

0:04:44 > 0:04:47There was this mattress, I was just lying there, apparently,

0:04:47 > 0:04:48cos I don't remember a thing about it -

0:04:48 > 0:04:51I'd taken my clothes off and I was sound asleep.

0:04:51 > 0:04:55Basically naked. By the bins!

0:04:55 > 0:04:57Ugh! Amazing, yeah.

0:04:57 > 0:05:00I told my mum about that.

0:05:00 > 0:05:02What?

0:05:03 > 0:05:06You told your mum I was found naked by the bins?

0:05:06 > 0:05:09- Yeah. - What d'you tell her that for?

0:05:09 > 0:05:10I thought she'd find it funny.

0:05:10 > 0:05:12And did she?

0:05:12 > 0:05:14Not really.

0:05:14 > 0:05:16Brilliant. Thanks for that.

0:05:16 > 0:05:18She thought it was weird.

0:05:18 > 0:05:20Of course she thought it was weird! I was lying naked by the bins!

0:05:20 > 0:05:23Why do you tell your mum that?

0:05:23 > 0:05:26That's not a thing you'd tell your mum. That's amazing.

0:05:26 > 0:05:28Tell her about the nice things I do.

0:05:28 > 0:05:32Tell her about the plant. No, don't tell her about the plant.

0:05:32 > 0:05:34Don't tell her I spent four quid on it.

0:05:34 > 0:05:36Tell her I was found naked by the bins.

0:05:36 > 0:05:39I bet she's told your dad. He'll use that against me.

0:05:39 > 0:05:43Course he will. That's the sort of thing he'll bring up in his speech.

0:05:45 > 0:05:47What speech?

0:05:48 > 0:05:50Have you seen my Kit Kats?

0:05:50 > 0:05:51What d'you mean speech?

0:05:51 > 0:05:52I didn't mean speech.

0:05:54 > 0:05:55Wedding speech?

0:05:55 > 0:05:56DOORBELL RINGS

0:05:56 > 0:05:58That'll be Laura.

0:05:58 > 0:05:59Steve.

0:05:59 > 0:06:02No! Of course not!

0:06:02 > 0:06:05I just I suppose I mean if he ever did a speech

0:06:05 > 0:06:07that's the sort of thing he'd bring up.

0:06:07 > 0:06:09Because he's such a bastard.

0:06:09 > 0:06:13When would he do a speech about you apart from at our wedding?

0:06:14 > 0:06:16That really hurt.

0:06:16 > 0:06:18Good.

0:06:19 > 0:06:21Hello, Laura!

0:06:21 > 0:06:22Here he is.

0:06:23 > 0:06:26Isn't he handsome? I've already got a crush on him.

0:06:26 > 0:06:27Ah! He's lovely.

0:06:27 > 0:06:30He's only two inches long. Imagine that.

0:06:30 > 0:06:34I could keep him in my handbag. Paul reckons he saw his bell end.

0:06:34 > 0:06:35It was massive.

0:06:35 > 0:06:37All right, Laura.

0:06:37 > 0:06:38Becks, meet your nephew.

0:06:38 > 0:06:40Ah.

0:06:41 > 0:06:42Ah! Isn't he lovely?

0:06:42 > 0:06:44He weighs half an ounce.

0:06:44 > 0:06:46I wish I weighed half an ounce.

0:06:46 > 0:06:50- But he'll get bigger. Won't he, Laura?- Yeah.

0:06:51 > 0:06:54I've grown a moustache.

0:06:54 > 0:06:56Yep.

0:06:56 > 0:06:58What d'you think of him?

0:06:58 > 0:07:01Ah. He's very cute, isn't he?

0:07:01 > 0:07:02Fit?

0:07:02 > 0:07:04Sorry?

0:07:04 > 0:07:05D'you think he's fit?

0:07:05 > 0:07:07Yep.

0:07:07 > 0:07:10Good. Get dressed, Steve. We're going for a picnic.

0:07:10 > 0:07:11I've got a hangover, Laura.

0:07:11 > 0:07:12No, you don't.

0:07:12 > 0:07:15I'll phone Shelly. Find out what the fuck she thinks she's doing.

0:07:15 > 0:07:17Turn the telly off, Paul.

0:07:19 > 0:07:20Picnic?

0:07:21 > 0:07:23We're not going to go.

0:07:23 > 0:07:25I don't want to go for a picnic.

0:07:25 > 0:07:28She'll make us play frisbee. There'll be insects.

0:07:28 > 0:07:29We're not going to go, Steve.

0:07:29 > 0:07:30What are you doing?

0:07:32 > 0:07:33I've got a headache.

0:07:33 > 0:07:34Here.

0:07:36 > 0:07:37Oh, thanks.

0:07:38 > 0:07:40Fair enough.

0:07:47 > 0:07:50You meant wedding speech, didn't you?

0:07:50 > 0:07:54No! I swear on my mum's life! You're being mental.

0:07:58 > 0:08:00Hey, Becks. We've brought a frisbee.

0:08:00 > 0:08:01Oh. Brilliant.

0:08:01 > 0:08:03We thought we could make some friends in the park.

0:08:03 > 0:08:06Get a bit of a gang together and have a massive game of frisbee.

0:08:06 > 0:08:08- Yeah. Sounds great.- Excellent.

0:08:11 > 0:08:15You haven't congratulated Paul on his moustache, Becks.

0:08:16 > 0:08:19Oh. Sorry. Congratulations.

0:08:19 > 0:08:23Thank you, Becky. Yeah. I've also trimmed my pubes.

0:08:23 > 0:08:25Oh, good.

0:08:25 > 0:08:27Say something nice about it.

0:08:30 > 0:08:33It's a really, really, really nice moustache.

0:08:33 > 0:08:34Thank you, Becky.

0:08:34 > 0:08:37He's allowed to have it for a week and then he's going to shave it.

0:08:37 > 0:08:39I'm not fucking shaving it.

0:08:39 > 0:08:41You ready for the picnic, Steve?

0:08:41 > 0:08:43Um, nearly.

0:08:43 > 0:08:45What we've done is, we've brought the frisbee

0:08:45 > 0:08:48so we thought you two could maybe bring the food.

0:08:48 > 0:08:50Just some bits and pieces, some sausage rolls, a Toblerone.

0:08:50 > 0:08:52Give them the list.

0:08:55 > 0:08:57If I've written it in capitals, it means I want loads of it.

0:09:02 > 0:09:04PHONE RINGS

0:09:04 > 0:09:05Loo roll?

0:09:05 > 0:09:06We've run out.

0:09:06 > 0:09:09Hello, Shelly. Where the fuck are you?

0:09:09 > 0:09:11One minute, Shell.

0:09:12 > 0:09:14Go on.

0:09:14 > 0:09:15'I'm so sorry, Laura.

0:09:15 > 0:09:19'I was just saying it's been a really busy morning.

0:09:19 > 0:09:22'I had to go to the Post Office. And...

0:09:22 > 0:09:25'Sorry, I just... I had to go to the Post Office.

0:09:25 > 0:09:28'So I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry.

0:09:28 > 0:09:31'I lost track of the time and I was at the Post Office.

0:09:31 > 0:09:34'I know you're going to be angry at me

0:09:34 > 0:09:36'but I really can't wait to see the scan.'

0:09:36 > 0:09:38OK. Bye then.

0:09:41 > 0:09:46Steve, you haven't congratulated Paul on his moustache.

0:09:48 > 0:09:50Congratulations on your moustache.

0:09:50 > 0:09:52Thank you.

0:09:52 > 0:09:54Ask him about it.

0:09:55 > 0:09:57How long did it take to grow it?

0:09:58 > 0:09:59About a week?

0:09:59 > 0:10:01Bit more.

0:10:02 > 0:10:03Er, ten days?

0:10:03 > 0:10:04Bit less.

0:10:04 > 0:10:05Eight days?

0:10:05 > 0:10:06Bit more.

0:10:08 > 0:10:09Nine days.

0:10:09 > 0:10:10Great.

0:10:10 > 0:10:12DOORBELL RINGS

0:10:12 > 0:10:13Now go...

0:10:18 > 0:10:20Go to Sainsbury's, get the picnic food

0:10:20 > 0:10:22and stop being such an ugly C-word.

0:10:22 > 0:10:24DOORBELL RINGS

0:10:25 > 0:10:29You might want to do something with your hair, Becks.

0:10:29 > 0:10:31You look like such a rotten old C-word.

0:10:31 > 0:10:32Thanks.

0:10:36 > 0:10:39Hello, Shelly. That was quick. You had trouble at the Post Office?

0:10:42 > 0:10:45Oh, right.

0:10:45 > 0:10:46Wow.

0:10:46 > 0:10:48OK.

0:10:48 > 0:10:49You'd better come in.

0:10:49 > 0:10:50Thanks.

0:10:50 > 0:10:52You've got your...

0:10:53 > 0:10:55Oh, thanks.

0:10:57 > 0:10:59You, you won't tell Laura, will you?

0:10:59 > 0:11:01No. Of course not.

0:11:01 > 0:11:02Thanks.

0:11:08 > 0:11:10I'm so sorry for being late, Laura.

0:11:10 > 0:11:12Yes, Shelly. We heard.

0:11:12 > 0:11:15I had to go to the Post Office.

0:11:15 > 0:11:17Who goes to the Post Office dressed like that?

0:11:17 > 0:11:19You had a nice morning?

0:11:19 > 0:11:21It's been bloody brilliant.

0:11:25 > 0:11:28Here he is - the world's next megastar.

0:11:28 > 0:11:32Aw! He's lovely. Congratulations.

0:11:32 > 0:11:34How d'you know it's a boy?

0:11:34 > 0:11:36I saw his bell end.

0:11:37 > 0:11:39They've done all their tests and all their scans

0:11:39 > 0:11:42and they said he's all right. He's not faulty.

0:11:42 > 0:11:43Oh, how lovely.

0:11:43 > 0:11:45Yeah.

0:11:45 > 0:11:46I'm so pleased for you.

0:11:46 > 0:11:48I know.

0:11:48 > 0:11:51We'd been drinking since like ten in the morning so I was pretty pissed.

0:11:51 > 0:11:55- Yeah.- And then for some reason, around midnight,

0:11:55 > 0:11:58I slope off, pissed out my head, no-one can find me.

0:11:58 > 0:11:59They looked everywhere.

0:11:59 > 0:12:02- Yep.- They looked in the gents. They looked in the ladies!

0:12:02 > 0:12:04They called my mobile, no answer.

0:12:04 > 0:12:07And why was there no answer? Because later they found me...

0:12:07 > 0:12:08It's a rubber.

0:12:15 > 0:12:16And have you agreed on a name yet?

0:12:16 > 0:12:19Yes. We're going to name him Frank.

0:12:19 > 0:12:21Frank's a lovely name.

0:12:21 > 0:12:24It's a tribute to the late Anne Frank. The novelist.

0:12:24 > 0:12:25Her books are fucking nuts.

0:12:25 > 0:12:27Yeah.

0:12:27 > 0:12:28Very nice.

0:12:28 > 0:12:33What d'you think, Becks? D'you think he looks like a Frank?

0:12:33 > 0:12:35Yeah. Definitely.

0:12:47 > 0:12:49Ah!

0:12:49 > 0:12:51ICE CREAM VAN TUNE PLAYS

0:12:51 > 0:12:52You're buying me an ice lolly.

0:12:52 > 0:12:54D'you want a plaster for your head?

0:12:54 > 0:12:55Why, what's wrong with it?

0:12:55 > 0:12:56Ah!

0:12:56 > 0:12:58Sounds painful!

0:12:58 > 0:13:00We had chicken for my dinner, Shell.

0:13:00 > 0:13:03Oh. Lovely.

0:13:03 > 0:13:05Yeah. We had it with potatoes.

0:13:06 > 0:13:07Come on.

0:13:07 > 0:13:08Thanks.

0:13:10 > 0:13:12Nice plant.

0:13:12 > 0:13:13Thank you.

0:13:18 > 0:13:20How've you been? We haven't seen you all week.

0:13:20 > 0:13:23Yeah, I've been good. Yeah. I joined a gym.

0:13:23 > 0:13:26Oh. Very nice.

0:13:30 > 0:13:31I've got a hangover.

0:13:31 > 0:13:33Oh no.

0:13:33 > 0:13:37I went out with Hayley, Kelly, Rebecca, that lot.

0:13:40 > 0:13:43You shouldn't go to the gym on a hangover.

0:13:43 > 0:13:44Right.

0:13:46 > 0:13:49They've got these tellies, like really high up,

0:13:49 > 0:13:52and we all watch them when we're doing stuff.

0:13:52 > 0:13:54Oh, that's a good idea.

0:13:54 > 0:13:55Yeah.

0:13:59 > 0:14:02There's this bloke called Graham at the gym and he was saying I should...

0:14:02 > 0:14:04Paul!

0:14:08 > 0:14:10She seems very excited about the scan.

0:14:10 > 0:14:12- Paul!- Excuse me.

0:14:12 > 0:14:15- Paul!- Yes, darling! I'm coming!

0:14:15 > 0:14:18- Paul!- I'm coming!

0:14:24 > 0:14:26- Have they gone?- No.

0:14:26 > 0:14:28How you feeling?

0:14:28 > 0:14:29Really tired.

0:14:31 > 0:14:34What were you drinking last night? What was it, Stella?

0:14:34 > 0:14:36Then they made you have Sambuca? Jager bombs?

0:14:36 > 0:14:38Get off.

0:14:38 > 0:14:40- You should've had an egg before bed. - I was too tired

0:14:40 > 0:14:43Yeah, I could hear that. You were clumping about all over the place.

0:14:43 > 0:14:45Get off.

0:14:46 > 0:14:48You fell over in the toilet, didn't you?

0:14:48 > 0:14:52Go and sit on the sofa and stop being an arsehole.

0:15:04 > 0:15:06Are they getting me one?

0:15:06 > 0:15:07Yeah.

0:15:10 > 0:15:12I'd better get a Flake.

0:15:21 > 0:15:23Picnic! A bloody picnic!

0:15:23 > 0:15:25Why do you have to go outside to eat? You can eat in bed!

0:15:25 > 0:15:27It's like these people you see that go for coffee.

0:15:27 > 0:15:29You can drink coffee in bed.

0:15:29 > 0:15:31There's no need to leave the house to do it.

0:15:31 > 0:15:32And Pizza Hut.

0:15:32 > 0:15:34You can get a man to bring your pizzas to your door

0:15:34 > 0:15:35and you can eat them in bed.

0:15:35 > 0:15:37There's no need to actually go to a Pizza Hut.

0:15:37 > 0:15:38Unless you're having the salad.

0:15:38 > 0:15:41But if you're going to Pizza Hut and you're having the salad,

0:15:41 > 0:15:42then you're a fucking idiot.

0:15:43 > 0:15:44Becks...

0:15:44 > 0:15:46Have you finished?

0:15:46 > 0:15:47Yeah.

0:15:51 > 0:15:53I've had another wave.

0:15:55 > 0:15:57I think I'm going to puke again.

0:15:59 > 0:16:02You. Are. 100%...

0:16:04 > 0:16:05..Filth.

0:16:17 > 0:16:20Why d'you have to go outside just because it's sunny?

0:16:20 > 0:16:22- Can you stop breathing on me?- Sorry.

0:16:22 > 0:16:25Why d'you have to go outside just because it's sunny?

0:16:48 > 0:16:51I can't believe you thought I meant wedding speech earlier.

0:16:51 > 0:16:53Oh, God...

0:16:59 > 0:17:02SHE WRETCHES

0:17:05 > 0:17:06All right?

0:17:06 > 0:17:08Yes. Very good, thanks.

0:17:10 > 0:17:12SHE SIGHS

0:17:12 > 0:17:15Nice day, isn't it?

0:17:16 > 0:17:18Yeah. Lovely.

0:17:18 > 0:17:21We're going to go for a picnic with some friends.

0:17:21 > 0:17:23Lovely.

0:17:23 > 0:17:25Well it's the weather for it, isn't it?

0:17:25 > 0:17:26Gotta make the most of it.

0:17:26 > 0:17:27SHE COUGHS

0:17:27 > 0:17:29Yes.

0:17:30 > 0:17:32I'd better be off.

0:17:32 > 0:17:33Bye.

0:17:33 > 0:17:35Bye.

0:17:44 > 0:17:45Dan!

0:17:45 > 0:17:47Sorry.

0:17:47 > 0:17:48Take it off!

0:17:48 > 0:17:50Sorry.

0:17:50 > 0:17:52Dan.

0:17:52 > 0:17:53Sorry.

0:17:58 > 0:17:59Ice creams are here!

0:17:59 > 0:18:01I think everyone should just smile and be happy.

0:18:01 > 0:18:04And then I'd get my forehead done. Because there's creases in it. Look.

0:18:04 > 0:18:08I can't stand it. It's pathetic. And I'd like a smaller nose.

0:18:08 > 0:18:11Or a bigger head. And better hands.

0:18:11 > 0:18:13My hands are gross, too many fingers.

0:18:14 > 0:18:15Cosmetic surgery.

0:18:15 > 0:18:17There's an advert on the tube.

0:18:17 > 0:18:19I went on the website

0:18:19 > 0:18:22and they basically change anything you want them too.

0:18:28 > 0:18:29Oh. Hello.

0:18:29 > 0:18:30Hi.

0:18:31 > 0:18:33I've just been in Flat B.

0:18:33 > 0:18:34Oh, God.

0:18:34 > 0:18:36It's disgusting in there.

0:18:36 > 0:18:38Why doesn't that surprise me?

0:18:38 > 0:18:39Well...

0:18:40 > 0:18:44I'm on my own. D'you want to come in?

0:18:46 > 0:18:48I've got to go to the vet's.

0:18:48 > 0:18:51If you don't want to come in, just say you don't want to come in.

0:18:51 > 0:18:53Don't lead me on this merry fucking dance.

0:18:53 > 0:18:55No, I do. I do.

0:18:56 > 0:18:58But I've got to take Tiger to the vet's.

0:18:59 > 0:19:01What's wrong with him?

0:19:01 > 0:19:02Injections.

0:19:02 > 0:19:03Again?

0:19:03 > 0:19:05And then, when everything else is done,

0:19:05 > 0:19:09if I can find the money, I'd like a new pair of legs.

0:19:09 > 0:19:12Thanks for these. How much do I owe you?

0:19:12 > 0:19:14They're a gift from Shelly. Where's Becks?

0:19:14 > 0:19:16Becks!

0:19:16 > 0:19:18No. Honestly. It's fine.

0:19:19 > 0:19:20Thank you, Shelly.

0:19:20 > 0:19:21Yeah, thanks.

0:19:21 > 0:19:23Are you OK, Becks?

0:19:24 > 0:19:26Becks. Are you OK in there?

0:19:26 > 0:19:28She's not feeling very well.

0:19:28 > 0:19:31Becks! Just answer me yes or no. Are you OK in there?

0:19:31 > 0:19:33I'm fine!

0:19:33 > 0:19:36You don't sound fine.

0:19:36 > 0:19:38- OK, Laura!- Are you being sick?

0:19:38 > 0:19:40Yes.

0:19:40 > 0:19:42We got you an ice cream!

0:19:42 > 0:19:46Could you maybe go into the kitchen and close the door?

0:19:46 > 0:19:47Sorry, I missed that.

0:19:47 > 0:19:51- I think she wants us to move into the kitchen.- It's a lovely day outside!- OK, Laura!

0:19:51 > 0:19:53All the boys have got their tops off!

0:19:53 > 0:19:55Come on. Let's go into the kitchen.

0:19:55 > 0:19:57I'm going into the kitchen now, OK, Becks?

0:19:57 > 0:20:00Steve's being mean to a pregnant person.

0:20:00 > 0:20:01Just yell if you need me, yeah?

0:20:02 > 0:20:04Yeah?

0:20:05 > 0:20:06Becks!

0:20:06 > 0:20:07Yeah.

0:20:07 > 0:20:09Love you!

0:20:14 > 0:20:17Right, everyone. I'm going to eat my lolly.

0:20:23 > 0:20:25Bloody hell.

0:20:29 > 0:20:31Yeah.

0:20:31 > 0:20:34Ice cream's bad for the baby but I love a lolly, don't I, Paul?

0:20:34 > 0:20:35Yeah.

0:20:35 > 0:20:37I love having something to suck on! As it were!

0:20:51 > 0:20:54No, I do. I love sucking on things. I'll suck on anything.

0:20:54 > 0:20:57God, you should've seen me at school.

0:20:57 > 0:21:00- I don't think there was a boy in my year that I didn't...- Laura.

0:21:00 > 0:21:02What's this?

0:21:14 > 0:21:16Don't you dare get married before me.

0:21:16 > 0:21:18No, that's not the...

0:21:18 > 0:21:21It's fucking... No.

0:21:23 > 0:21:25No!

0:21:27 > 0:21:31Hey, Becks. All ready for the picnic? Paul!

0:21:33 > 0:21:34Could you do me a Resolve?

0:21:34 > 0:21:36Yeah. Of course.

0:21:40 > 0:21:42What?

0:21:42 > 0:21:45Dan! You haven't congratulated Paul on his moustache!

0:21:45 > 0:21:48Oh, yeah. Congratulations on your moustache, Paul.

0:21:48 > 0:21:51Thank you, Dan. I've also trimmed my pubes.

0:21:51 > 0:21:52What made you decide to do it, Paul?

0:21:52 > 0:21:55Dunno. Just one of those things, you know?

0:21:55 > 0:21:59You wake up one morning and think, "Why don't I have a moustache?"

0:21:59 > 0:22:02You know, there are two types of people in this world,

0:22:02 > 0:22:05people who've got moustaches, and people who don't.

0:22:05 > 0:22:08And I decided to just say fuck it and grow a moustache.

0:22:10 > 0:22:12How long did it take to grow it?

0:22:12 > 0:22:13Erm...

0:22:13 > 0:22:14Nine days.

0:22:16 > 0:22:19It's good to try something different, isn't it?

0:22:19 > 0:22:23Yeah. It is. Thank you, Shelly. Yeah.

0:22:23 > 0:22:25There's this bloke called Graham at the gym...

0:22:25 > 0:22:27Paul. We're going.

0:22:27 > 0:22:29Coming, darling.

0:22:29 > 0:22:32- Don't forget the food, baby! - Yeah. We'll catch you up.

0:22:32 > 0:22:34- Excellent. We'll be by the pond. - You got my sunglasses?

0:22:34 > 0:22:37They're on your shirt, Paul.

0:22:37 > 0:22:39- Oh, yeah.- Shelly!

0:22:42 > 0:22:45I'll be two minutes, Laura, I'm just going to speak to Becky.

0:22:45 > 0:22:47All right, Becky?

0:22:47 > 0:22:49No.

0:22:49 > 0:22:51How's things? How're you feeling?

0:22:51 > 0:22:52Awful.

0:22:52 > 0:22:54Oh, dear.

0:22:55 > 0:22:57You two OK?

0:22:57 > 0:23:00Yep. Cleaning your teeth?

0:23:00 > 0:23:01No.

0:23:01 > 0:23:03You having a good day?

0:23:03 > 0:23:06Nope. I've got a hangover.

0:23:06 > 0:23:07Yeah.

0:23:10 > 0:23:12A lot of toothpaste.

0:23:12 > 0:23:14I know it is.

0:23:16 > 0:23:19We've just seen something very exciting.

0:23:19 > 0:23:20Oh, yes!

0:23:20 > 0:23:24Dan? Shelly? D'you want to leave us to it, yeah?

0:23:24 > 0:23:25Yeah. Bye then.

0:23:25 > 0:23:26- Bye.- Bye.

0:23:32 > 0:23:34Shelly!

0:23:36 > 0:23:39You don't have to do everything she says.

0:23:44 > 0:23:45Sorry.

0:24:00 > 0:24:03Why didn't you tell me I looked like this?

0:24:06 > 0:24:07You look lovely.

0:24:10 > 0:24:12Seriously. Look at me.

0:24:12 > 0:24:15I stink. My hair's a mess.

0:24:17 > 0:24:19- What's that?- What?

0:24:19 > 0:24:20Becky!

0:24:20 > 0:24:22What is it?

0:24:22 > 0:24:24Nothing! It's my massive dick.

0:24:24 > 0:24:26Well I know that's a lie.

0:24:26 > 0:24:28Becky!

0:24:28 > 0:24:30Laura says, "Hurry the fuck up."

0:24:30 > 0:24:32We'll be five minutes!

0:24:32 > 0:24:33Quicker!

0:24:33 > 0:24:34OK!

0:24:38 > 0:24:40I need to lie down.

0:24:45 > 0:24:47Why won't you let me look in your pocket?

0:24:47 > 0:24:50You can look in there if you want. I'm not stopping you.

0:24:54 > 0:24:56My feet are freezing.

0:24:57 > 0:24:59Mind if I close the curtains?

0:25:02 > 0:25:04So what are we watching then?

0:25:04 > 0:25:06D'you want to see what's on iPlayer?

0:25:06 > 0:25:10Or we could see if there's a Bodyshock we haven't watched.

0:25:12 > 0:25:14I can't find my socks.

0:25:16 > 0:25:18Where are my socks?

0:25:18 > 0:25:20Have you seen any of my socks?

0:25:20 > 0:25:21Erm...

0:25:21 > 0:25:23My feet are freezing.

0:25:23 > 0:25:26You could try looking in the...

0:25:31 > 0:25:34Why have you got a bottle of cava in the laundry basket?

0:25:34 > 0:25:35Because...

0:25:35 > 0:25:39it was on special offer and I didn't want Laura finding it and nicking it.

0:25:44 > 0:25:45What?

0:25:45 > 0:25:47What's going on?

0:25:48 > 0:25:49Nothing.

0:25:55 > 0:25:59See? You are being so suspicious today.

0:25:59 > 0:26:02I think at one point you thought I was going to ask you to marry me.

0:26:02 > 0:26:04Shut up...

0:26:04 > 0:26:06You did, didn't you?

0:26:06 > 0:26:07Shut up...

0:26:07 > 0:26:10Why would I want to marry you? You fucking stink.

0:26:11 > 0:26:14We don't even believe in marriage!

0:26:14 > 0:26:15OK. Don't shout!

0:26:16 > 0:26:18As if we're going to get married!

0:26:25 > 0:26:26Come on.

0:26:26 > 0:26:28Let's get you in bed.

0:26:28 > 0:26:29You stinky bitch.

0:26:30 > 0:26:34# My heart goes boom bang-a-bang boom bang-a-bang

0:26:34 > 0:26:36# When you are near

0:26:36 > 0:26:38# Boom bang-a-bang, boom bang-a-bang

0:26:38 > 0:26:40# Loud in my ear

0:26:40 > 0:26:41# Pounding away, pounding away

0:26:41 > 0:26:44# Won't you be mine?

0:26:44 > 0:26:47# Boom bang-a-bang-bang all the time

0:26:47 > 0:26:51# It's such a lovely feeling

0:26:51 > 0:26:55# When I'm in your arms

0:26:55 > 0:26:59# Don't go away I wanna stay my whole life through

0:26:59 > 0:27:01# Boom bang-a-bang-bang Close to you. #