0:00:02 > 0:00:09This programme contains strong language
0:00:09 > 0:00:11I was planning a surprise for Steve in the flat.
0:00:11 > 0:00:13This is Lee, he used to go out with Becky.
0:00:13 > 0:00:15We were together four and a half years.
0:00:15 > 0:00:17Laura's just told me. She said you were pregnant.
0:00:17 > 0:00:19I just want you to know I'm here for you, babe.
0:00:19 > 0:00:21What did he want? Nothing.
0:00:21 > 0:00:24You have both made the declarations required by law
0:00:24 > 0:00:27and have made a solemn and binding contract
0:00:27 > 0:00:30with each other in the presence of your witnesses and guests.
0:00:30 > 0:00:35It gives me great pleasure to pronounce you husband and wife.
0:00:35 > 0:00:38APPLAUSE
0:00:38 > 0:00:41And I'm going to tell everyone what you've done with that faggot.
0:00:41 > 0:00:44Well, what's everyone going to think about you for marrying me?
0:00:48 > 0:00:50Sorry about all this,
0:00:50 > 0:00:51I'm not actually very used to public speaking.
0:00:51 > 0:00:53Could've fooled me!
0:00:53 > 0:00:55LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE
0:01:06 > 0:01:08I am the bride!
0:01:08 > 0:01:11I know you are, Laura. I'm so sorry.
0:01:11 > 0:01:13You do not...
0:01:13 > 0:01:15You do not tell me I've had too much to drink...
0:01:15 > 0:01:17Come on, Laura, darling...
0:01:17 > 0:01:18No! Laura!
0:01:18 > 0:01:20You're such a virgin.
0:01:20 > 0:01:23She didn't mean it. She gets like this...
0:01:23 > 0:01:25I think my dress has got a little bit dirty.
0:01:27 > 0:01:29Here. Come on. Why don't you have a little dance?
0:01:29 > 0:01:32No! I'm going to tell Steve you're pregnant
0:01:32 > 0:01:35and there's nothing you can do about it.
0:01:35 > 0:01:36Laura!
0:01:37 > 0:01:40Right, I got something I want to tell you.
0:01:40 > 0:01:43Laura! Come and have a dance, yeah?
0:01:43 > 0:01:45CHEERING
0:01:45 > 0:01:46MUSIC PLAYS
0:01:46 > 0:01:48APPLAUSE
0:01:52 > 0:01:54MUSIC: "It's Not Unusual" by Tom Jones
0:01:56 > 0:01:58# But when I see you out and about... #
0:01:58 > 0:02:00You all right?
0:02:02 > 0:02:04Not really.
0:02:04 > 0:02:05You?
0:02:07 > 0:02:08No.
0:02:08 > 0:02:10# It happens every day... #
0:02:10 > 0:02:12HE CRUNCHES
0:02:12 > 0:02:14Would you mind not eating that in my ear?
0:02:14 > 0:02:16Sorry. Thanks.
0:02:16 > 0:02:18Oi, Steve.
0:02:18 > 0:02:19In here. Now.
0:02:19 > 0:02:22# Love will never do
0:02:22 > 0:02:23# What you want it to
0:02:25 > 0:02:30# Why can't this crazy love be mine? #
0:02:30 > 0:02:32TAPS RUN
0:02:32 > 0:02:33THEY GROAN IN DISGUST
0:02:33 > 0:02:35Bloody hell, Paul. Oh, my God.
0:02:35 > 0:02:38It smelt like this before I came in here.
0:02:41 > 0:02:42HE GROANS
0:02:42 > 0:02:44DOOR OPENS AND CLOSES
0:02:44 > 0:02:46It smelt like this before I came in here.
0:02:46 > 0:02:47What do you want?
0:02:47 > 0:02:48Laura's fucked.
0:02:48 > 0:02:51She's said I've got to choose between her and Graham.
0:02:51 > 0:02:52Hello.
0:02:52 > 0:02:53Ooh. Smelly!
0:02:54 > 0:02:55Excuse me.
0:02:59 > 0:03:01TOILET SEAT GOES DOWN
0:03:01 > 0:03:01TROUSERS ARE UNZIPPED
0:03:01 > 0:03:03Shall we do the rest of this outside? Yeah.
0:03:07 > 0:03:09TOM JONES: # It's such a crime... #
0:03:11 > 0:03:14Here he is! I'm just going to find my lady wife...
0:03:14 > 0:03:16You've got your honeymoon for that!
0:03:17 > 0:03:19# It happens every day
0:03:19 > 0:03:21# No matter what you say
0:03:22 > 0:03:27# You'll find it happens all the time
0:03:27 > 0:03:30# Love will never do
0:03:30 > 0:03:32# What you want it to
0:03:32 > 0:03:34# Why can't this crazy love...? #
0:03:34 > 0:03:35Oh, thanks.
0:03:37 > 0:03:39Come with me. I want to tell you something!
0:03:39 > 0:03:41I'm all right, thanks, Laura.
0:03:42 > 0:03:45Oi! Go in there and get your cock out.
0:03:45 > 0:03:47Hi.
0:03:47 > 0:03:49Hi. Laura, what did you just say to him?
0:03:51 > 0:03:55# It's not unusual to be mad with anyone
0:03:56 > 0:04:01# It's not unusual to be sad with anyone
0:04:01 > 0:04:05# But if I ever find that you've changed at any time... #
0:04:07 > 0:04:08Go on.
0:04:08 > 0:04:10Thanks, Steve.
0:04:10 > 0:04:12I really, really respect Muslims.
0:04:12 > 0:04:14I'm not a Muslim.
0:04:14 > 0:04:16Laura. Please don't tell Steve... Shut it.
0:04:16 > 0:04:19I've actually got quite a lot in common with Muslims,
0:04:19 > 0:04:24because I'm nice and I'm kind and I believe in God,
0:04:24 > 0:04:26but then if you annoy me...
0:04:26 > 0:04:28I go ape-shit.
0:04:28 > 0:04:29I'm not a Muslim.
0:04:29 > 0:04:30HE GROANS Laura!
0:04:30 > 0:04:32Oh, go shove it up your smelly arse.
0:04:33 > 0:04:35Laura!
0:04:35 > 0:04:39MUSIC: "Can't Get You Out Of My Head" by Kylie Minogue
0:04:39 > 0:04:40All right?
0:04:40 > 0:04:42Yep. Yes.
0:04:42 > 0:04:44# La-la-la-la-la... #
0:04:44 > 0:04:46Ugh!
0:04:46 > 0:04:47Do you know where Laura went?
0:04:47 > 0:04:49Where do you want to put it?
0:04:50 > 0:04:52Sorry?
0:04:52 > 0:04:53Where do you want to put it?
0:04:53 > 0:04:56If you do it from behind, you won't have to look at me.
0:04:56 > 0:04:56Laura?
0:04:56 > 0:04:59Come on. You know you want it.
0:05:00 > 0:05:01I really don't.
0:05:01 > 0:05:03I'll suck you off.
0:05:03 > 0:05:04You can come in my face.
0:05:04 > 0:05:06Steve? SHE KNOCKS ON DOOR
0:05:06 > 0:05:08Hurry up. Laura!
0:05:10 > 0:05:13Your dad likes Shelly, doesn't he?
0:05:13 > 0:05:14Yeah.
0:05:14 > 0:05:16Oh, come on. He's fine. He's just having a laugh.
0:05:16 > 0:05:18SHE KNOCKS
0:05:18 > 0:05:19Laura?
0:05:22 > 0:05:24Everyone's saying how bad Steve's speech was.
0:05:27 > 0:05:28Steve?
0:05:28 > 0:05:30Suck on my tits.
0:05:30 > 0:05:32No. Yes.
0:05:32 > 0:05:34No. Why are you laughing?
0:05:34 > 0:05:36Because...
0:05:36 > 0:05:39you're telling me to suck on your tits.
0:05:39 > 0:05:40Just do it so I can tell Paul.
0:05:40 > 0:05:42Let's go and have a dance, eh?
0:05:42 > 0:05:44This is your last chance.
0:05:44 > 0:05:47Are you going to suck on my tits or not?
0:05:47 > 0:05:48No!
0:05:48 > 0:05:49Don't laugh at me!
0:05:49 > 0:05:53I was thinking of popping outside for a bit, get some fresh air.
0:05:53 > 0:05:54OK.
0:05:54 > 0:05:56You should come with me. I'm worried about you.
0:05:56 > 0:05:58You need to be careful in your condition.
0:05:58 > 0:06:00I'm fine. I'm going to wait for Laura.
0:06:00 > 0:06:02Becky. Come on.
0:06:02 > 0:06:03HE SNORTS
0:06:03 > 0:06:05Don't fuck me about.
0:06:05 > 0:06:06Pardon?
0:06:06 > 0:06:09Becky's keeping a secret from you.
0:06:09 > 0:06:12And she's told Lee because she loves him.
0:06:12 > 0:06:13OK, Laura.
0:06:13 > 0:06:16She dreams about him at night.
0:06:16 > 0:06:17Course she does.
0:06:17 > 0:06:19She carries a lock of his hair.
0:06:19 > 0:06:20Nice.
0:06:20 > 0:06:22She sniffs it when you're asleep.
0:06:23 > 0:06:25And she's got a secret.
0:06:25 > 0:06:26She's told him...
0:06:28 > 0:06:30..and I know what it is.
0:06:30 > 0:06:32What?
0:06:35 > 0:06:36What is it?
0:06:38 > 0:06:39Laura...
0:06:39 > 0:06:41MUSIC: "Build Me Up Buttercup" by The Foundations
0:06:41 > 0:06:44Oh, my God!
0:06:45 > 0:06:47THEY CHEER
0:06:54 > 0:06:56# Why do you build me up
0:06:56 > 0:06:58# Build me up, buttercup, baby
0:06:58 > 0:07:00# Just to let me down? Let me down
0:07:00 > 0:07:02# And mess me around
0:07:02 > 0:07:04# And then worst of all Worst of all
0:07:04 > 0:07:05# You never call, baby
0:07:05 > 0:07:07# When you say you will Say you will
0:07:07 > 0:07:09# But I love you still
0:07:09 > 0:07:10# I need you I need you
0:07:10 > 0:07:13# More than anyone, darling
0:07:13 > 0:07:16# You know that I have from the start
0:07:16 > 0:07:18# So, build me up Build me up
0:07:18 > 0:07:21# Buttercup, don't break my heart
0:07:24 > 0:07:27# "I'll be over at ten" You told me time and again
0:07:27 > 0:07:30# But you're late I wait around and then
0:07:30 > 0:07:31# Bah-dah-dah
0:07:31 > 0:07:34# I went to the door I can't take any more
0:07:34 > 0:07:37# It's not you You let me down again
0:07:37 > 0:07:40# Hey, hey, hey Baby, baby, try to find
0:07:40 > 0:07:44# Hey, hey, hey A little time and I'll make you mine
0:07:44 > 0:07:46# Hey, hey, hey I'll be home
0:07:46 > 0:07:50# I'll be beside the phone waiting for you
0:07:50 > 0:07:54# Ooo-oo-ooo, ooo-oo-ooo
0:07:54 > 0:07:57# Why do you build me up Build me up
0:07:57 > 0:07:59# Buttercup, baby
0:07:59 > 0:08:01# Just to let me down? Let me down... #
0:08:01 > 0:08:04Hi, Mum. This is Ian! Paul's brother!
0:08:04 > 0:08:06Half-brother! I want to go home!
0:08:06 > 0:08:08No, he doesn't!
0:08:08 > 0:08:11Janet! Please! No! Please take your hands off me.
0:08:13 > 0:08:16You all right? Yeah! You? Yeah!
0:08:16 > 0:08:18Wah-hey!
0:08:18 > 0:08:20# Build me up Build me up
0:08:20 > 0:08:22# Buttercup, don't break my heart
0:08:24 > 0:08:29# You were my toy, but I could be the boy you adore
0:08:29 > 0:08:31# If you'd just let me know Bah-dah-dah
0:08:31 > 0:08:34# Although you're untrue, I'm attracted to you
0:08:34 > 0:08:36# All the more
0:08:36 > 0:08:38# Why do I need you so?
0:08:38 > 0:08:41# Hey, hey, hey Baby, baby, try to find
0:08:41 > 0:08:43# Hey, hey, hey
0:08:43 > 0:08:45# A little time and I'll make you mine
0:08:45 > 0:08:47# Hey, hey, hey I'll be home
0:08:47 > 0:08:51# I'll be beside the phone waiting for you
0:08:51 > 0:08:54# Ooo-oo-ooo, ooo-oo-ooo. #
0:08:55 > 0:08:58MUSIC: "Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go" by WHAM!
0:08:58 > 0:09:00# Jitterbug
0:09:01 > 0:09:03# Jitterbug
0:09:04 > 0:09:06# Jitterbug... #
0:09:07 > 0:09:10Calm down, mate. Come on.
0:09:10 > 0:09:13She said if I choose Graham I'll never see Bernadette again.
0:09:13 > 0:09:14Oh, what a pickle.
0:09:14 > 0:09:16Dan.
0:09:16 > 0:09:17Argh!
0:09:17 > 0:09:19Calm down. You're Bernadette's dad.
0:09:19 > 0:09:21She can't stop you seeing her.
0:09:21 > 0:09:22Oh, yes, she can.
0:09:22 > 0:09:24Ugh! Paul!
0:09:24 > 0:09:26I am a man and I have feelings!
0:09:32 > 0:09:34You all right?
0:09:34 > 0:09:36Yeah. Fine.
0:09:36 > 0:09:38It's me own fault.
0:09:38 > 0:09:39Shall I get you another drink?
0:09:42 > 0:09:44Nah. You're all right.
0:09:44 > 0:09:46# Wake me up before you go-go
0:09:46 > 0:09:49# Cos I'm not planning on going solo
0:09:49 > 0:09:53# Wake me up before you go-go... #
0:09:53 > 0:09:55You having that?
0:09:55 > 0:09:57Yeah.
0:09:57 > 0:10:02SMASHING INSIDE CUBICLE Fucking, stupid, fucking moron.
0:10:02 > 0:10:03Ugly, fucking...
0:10:05 > 0:10:07..piggy little bitch...
0:10:07 > 0:10:08Is he all right in there?
0:10:08 > 0:10:10PUNCHING AND KICKING DOOR Thick bitch!
0:10:10 > 0:10:13Yeah. He's fine. Stupid, stinking moron...
0:10:14 > 0:10:17By the way... Pathetic. ..your speech was diabolical.
0:10:17 > 0:10:18Fucking pathetic. Thanks.
0:10:24 > 0:10:26Just get in the cubicle and do it.
0:10:26 > 0:10:28Don't be silly, Laura. Becks?
0:10:28 > 0:10:30Just get it out. OK! Careful, Laur'!
0:10:30 > 0:10:32Come on. Just get it out. Careful, sweetheart.
0:10:32 > 0:10:33Becks, let's pop outside.
0:10:33 > 0:10:35Come on. Just a hand job.
0:10:35 > 0:10:39Oh, my God. You can close your eyes and imagine I'm her.
0:10:39 > 0:10:41Come on. No!
0:10:42 > 0:10:45It's just me and you, Paul. You can come out.
0:10:45 > 0:10:48Leave me alone, Steve. I'm going to kill myself.
0:10:48 > 0:10:50OK. How are you going to do that?
0:10:50 > 0:10:52Dunno yet.
0:10:53 > 0:10:55Shall I get you a knife?
0:10:55 > 0:10:57Pills?
0:10:57 > 0:10:58Bit of rope?
0:10:59 > 0:11:00I'm actually all right. Thanks.
0:11:00 > 0:11:01Right.
0:11:01 > 0:11:03Have you said anything to Steve about the baby?
0:11:05 > 0:11:08SHELLEY: Don't do that, Laura!
0:11:08 > 0:11:09Shut the door, Shell.
0:11:09 > 0:11:11Sorry.
0:11:12 > 0:11:13Sorry, Lee.
0:11:15 > 0:11:18I think you probably need a bit of time alone, Laura, darling.
0:11:18 > 0:11:21I've been planning this day since I was three...
0:11:22 > 0:11:26..so I don't really care about what you
0:11:26 > 0:11:30and your ugly little lesbian embryo are doing about anything.
0:11:32 > 0:11:34You know I love you, don't you?
0:11:37 > 0:11:39SHE CRIES
0:11:41 > 0:11:43SHE HALF-LAUGHS, HALF-CRIES
0:11:47 > 0:11:49SHE CRIES
0:11:50 > 0:11:54I think me and Becky should leave you alone for a bit, darling.
0:11:54 > 0:11:57You need a bit of me time.
0:11:57 > 0:11:59Do you know how much this wedding cost?
0:11:59 > 0:12:02Yeah, but it's been a lovely day, though, hasn't it?
0:12:02 > 0:12:04Everyone said lovely things about you.
0:12:04 > 0:12:05You did your lovely song.
0:12:06 > 0:12:09Everyone was saying how amazing you looked, weren't they?
0:12:09 > 0:12:13SHELLEY: I think you look absolutely beautiful, Laura.
0:12:13 > 0:12:14See?
0:12:17 > 0:12:20SHE SLAPS AWAY HAND Don't touch what you can't afford.
0:12:20 > 0:12:23I like being with Graham.
0:12:23 > 0:12:24I know.
0:12:25 > 0:12:28He's got this dressing gown I wear when I stay over.
0:12:28 > 0:12:30It's really soft.
0:12:30 > 0:12:32Ooh, it sounds lovely.
0:12:32 > 0:12:35And he's got this massive bath. It's massive, Steve.
0:12:35 > 0:12:36We got three of us in it.
0:12:38 > 0:12:42But Bernadette needs me. She needs her biological parents.
0:12:44 > 0:12:47Come on, Paul. I think you've got to call Graham.
0:12:49 > 0:12:51DOOR OPENS
0:12:55 > 0:12:56He's just so gentle, Steve.
0:12:58 > 0:12:59OK.
0:12:59 > 0:13:00He reads me like a map.
0:13:02 > 0:13:04He knows every contour of my body...
0:13:04 > 0:13:05All right, all right.
0:13:06 > 0:13:08Becky. Sweetheart.
0:13:08 > 0:13:10Come outside with me. It's a lovely evening.
0:13:10 > 0:13:11I need to look after Laura.
0:13:11 > 0:13:13APPLAUSE AND CHEERING
0:13:13 > 0:13:15What's so good about Steve?
0:13:15 > 0:13:17I'm sorry, but someone's got to say it.
0:13:17 > 0:13:20This is a man who asked you to marry him in his flat.
0:13:20 > 0:13:22The most important question of your life and does he hire out a limo?
0:13:22 > 0:13:25No. Does he take you up the London Eye? I think you'll have a dance.
0:13:25 > 0:13:27As soon as he finds out you're pregnant
0:13:27 > 0:13:30he's going to leave you. I've seen it a million times.
0:13:30 > 0:13:32So, you've got to tell him and tell him now
0:13:32 > 0:13:34and you'll see for yourself what kind of man he is.
0:13:34 > 0:13:36If you don't tell him, babe, I will.
0:13:36 > 0:13:37Hi.
0:13:40 > 0:13:41Hi.
0:13:41 > 0:13:43Hi. Hello.
0:13:44 > 0:13:45Tell me what?
0:13:45 > 0:13:47Hey! Come on! Join in!
0:13:47 > 0:13:49Don't be boring!
0:13:53 > 0:13:54Shelly!
0:13:54 > 0:13:56Go on, mate. Go on, mate.
0:13:58 > 0:14:01Come on, mate, don't be boring.
0:14:01 > 0:14:03Come on.
0:14:03 > 0:14:05MUSIC: "Do The Conga" by Gloria Estefan
0:14:07 > 0:14:09# Come on, shake your body, baby, do the conga
0:14:09 > 0:14:12# I know you can't control yourself any longer
0:14:12 > 0:14:14# Feel the rhythm of the music getting stronger
0:14:14 > 0:14:17# Don't you fight it till you've tried it, do the conga beat...
0:14:17 > 0:14:19THEY CHEER
0:14:23 > 0:14:27# Feel the fire of desire
0:14:27 > 0:14:29# As you dance the night away
0:14:31 > 0:14:35# Cos tonight we're gonna party
0:14:35 > 0:14:37# Till we see the break of day
0:14:39 > 0:14:45# Better get yourself together and hold on to what you got
0:14:46 > 0:14:51# Once the music hits your system
0:14:51 > 0:14:53# There's no way you're gonna stop...
0:14:53 > 0:14:55HE CRUNCHES ON CHOCOLATE BAR
0:14:58 > 0:14:59MUSIC CONTINUES
0:15:25 > 0:15:27# Come on, shake your body, baby, do the conga... #
0:15:27 > 0:15:30MUSIC STOPS Shit, shit, shit, shit...!
0:15:30 > 0:15:31ALL GROAN
0:15:32 > 0:15:34Shit!
0:15:35 > 0:15:37MUSIC STARTS AGAIN
0:15:37 > 0:15:38HE SIGHS IN RELIEF
0:15:38 > 0:15:39CHEERING
0:15:51 > 0:15:53DJ: Sorry about that, ladies and gentlemen.
0:15:55 > 0:15:57Please! Don't be like that!
0:15:57 > 0:16:00Leave me alone! For heaven's sakes! Don't be like that.
0:16:05 > 0:16:07Um, sorry, Daniel.
0:16:07 > 0:16:09MUSIC: "Everything Changes" by Take That
0:16:12 > 0:16:14All right?
0:16:15 > 0:16:17Come on, Shelly. What room are you in?
0:16:20 > 0:16:24Yes, OK, we could've legged it to your car, yes, but my point is,
0:16:24 > 0:16:28we didn't do any of those things and now I'm married to her, Graham.
0:16:30 > 0:16:31DOOR OPENS
0:16:31 > 0:16:33I need to do what's right for our baby.
0:16:35 > 0:16:39This isn't about you and me, Graham. She needs her biological parents.
0:16:40 > 0:16:42Oh, don't cry. Please don't cry.
0:16:47 > 0:16:48HE SIGHS
0:16:48 > 0:16:52I just want to know what room you're in, Shelly. It's quite simple.
0:16:53 > 0:16:55OK, Nigel.
0:16:55 > 0:16:57Have you seen Steve?
0:16:57 > 0:16:59Um...
0:16:59 > 0:17:01No, love. Sorry.
0:17:07 > 0:17:10HE SIGHS The wife's in bed.
0:17:10 > 0:17:12Get rid of that thing...
0:17:12 > 0:17:14and you and me can have some fun.
0:17:37 > 0:17:40Come on, Shelly. Don't be a bitch.
0:17:42 > 0:17:44I can't find Steve anywhere.
0:17:44 > 0:17:46Oh, no.
0:17:46 > 0:17:47HE CLICKS HIS TONGUE
0:17:50 > 0:17:51# Everything changes but you... #
0:17:53 > 0:17:56You give it all that with your high voice and your fake tan,
0:17:56 > 0:17:59but you're just as rotten as the rest of them.
0:17:59 > 0:18:02OK, Nigel. Goodbye now.
0:18:02 > 0:18:05You can't look like that and not expect men to take an interest.
0:18:08 > 0:18:09OK, Nigel.
0:18:09 > 0:18:10You look like a whore...
0:18:11 > 0:18:14..you get treated like a whore - it's just a fact of life.
0:18:14 > 0:18:17Don't get all fucking female about it...
0:18:17 > 0:18:18SHE GASPS
0:18:19 > 0:18:20What the fuck was that?
0:18:23 > 0:18:25SHE WHIMPERS
0:18:25 > 0:18:26HE GASPS
0:18:49 > 0:18:50HE SIGHS
0:18:50 > 0:18:52What's Becky going to tell me?
0:18:58 > 0:18:59Just tell me, please, Lee...
0:18:59 > 0:19:00Just tell me, please, Lee...
0:19:00 > 0:19:03because this is actually really not very nice.
0:19:24 > 0:19:28What's wrong with me, Dan? I can do it myself. Get off.
0:19:28 > 0:19:29I'm a monster. No, you're not, you're lovely.
0:19:29 > 0:19:31I'm fine. It's just a nosebleed.
0:19:31 > 0:19:33What happened?
0:19:33 > 0:19:35I killed him. I'm fine. It's just a nosebleed.
0:19:35 > 0:19:37I killed him. I've killed him, Dan!
0:19:37 > 0:19:38You haven't killed him.
0:19:38 > 0:19:42It's all right, Shell. Come on, let's sit you down.
0:19:45 > 0:19:48It's over. Me and Graham are over.
0:19:48 > 0:19:51I'm going to do the right thing for once. I'm going to change.
0:19:51 > 0:19:54Steve, I'm going to be a good father.
0:19:54 > 0:19:55That's great, Paul, yeah.
0:19:56 > 0:19:58I've told him it's over.
0:20:01 > 0:20:02I'm going to delete his number.
0:20:02 > 0:20:05I'm going to take all his pictures of me off the internet.
0:20:07 > 0:20:09What was I thinking?!
0:20:09 > 0:20:12When I say it out loud it doesn't even make sense!
0:20:12 > 0:20:14He's 58!
0:20:14 > 0:20:16It'd never work!
0:20:16 > 0:20:17And he's a man.
0:20:19 > 0:20:22I do love Laura. I know I do.
0:20:22 > 0:20:23We have something special.
0:20:23 > 0:20:25It's taken all this to prove it to me,
0:20:25 > 0:20:28but sometimes that's what love's like.
0:20:28 > 0:20:30She's an amazing woman and I love her
0:20:30 > 0:20:33and I'm going to be true to her and we're going to be the most
0:20:33 > 0:20:36loving biological parents Bernadette could ever need.
0:20:38 > 0:20:39I feel like a cloud's lifted.
0:20:41 > 0:20:45It's a happy ending, Steve. Everything's going to be OK.
0:20:45 > 0:20:47I'm pleased for you mate. I really am.
0:20:47 > 0:20:49I'm going to go find Laura, tell her the good news.
0:20:54 > 0:20:56All right?
0:21:13 > 0:21:14This is going to break Paul's heart.
0:21:19 > 0:21:21CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:21:27 > 0:21:29Right, ladies and gentlemen, the fireworks are starting
0:21:29 > 0:21:32so if you'd like to make your way outside and then back in here
0:21:32 > 0:21:35for some more top tunes.
0:21:35 > 0:21:39MUSIC: "The Promise" by Girls Aloud
0:21:39 > 0:21:42# Cos my heart is turning to solid gold
0:21:42 > 0:21:45# And my head is saying, honey too good to be true
0:21:45 > 0:21:47# Oh, one look into your glitter eyes
0:21:47 > 0:21:49# Power's failing me every time
0:21:49 > 0:21:51# You're gonna make me, make me love you... #
0:21:51 > 0:21:54This way. I think you need to tell me what's going on, Becks.
0:21:56 > 0:21:58Has Laura said anything to you?
0:21:59 > 0:22:00What about?
0:22:04 > 0:22:07You OK? It was just a nosebleed.
0:22:07 > 0:22:11I don't know what all the fuss was about.
0:22:11 > 0:22:14Hey!
0:22:14 > 0:22:17Absolutely. We'll be there in a minute.
0:22:17 > 0:22:19Great. See you out there!
0:22:19 > 0:22:20That's my son.
0:22:20 > 0:22:23Never. I thought he was your brother.
0:22:23 > 0:22:25Yeah, we get that a lot.
0:22:25 > 0:22:27Becky, you coming outside for the fireworks?
0:22:27 > 0:22:30Yeah. Definitely. We'll see you out there.
0:22:30 > 0:22:31Great.
0:22:31 > 0:22:33What's happening, Becks?
0:22:33 > 0:22:34Come on.
0:22:43 > 0:22:45Lee. You coming outside?
0:22:49 > 0:22:52Yeah. Just try and stop me! LAUGHTER OUTSIDE
0:22:59 > 0:23:01Right. This is it.
0:23:01 > 0:23:02Come on. Let's go into the room.
0:23:02 > 0:23:04No. I'm not coming in till you've told me.
0:23:04 > 0:23:05Come on. Don't be silly.
0:23:05 > 0:23:08No, I'm not coming in till you've told me, Becks.
0:23:08 > 0:23:09Come inside, Steve.
0:23:09 > 0:23:10I'm not coming in there. I'm not.
0:23:25 > 0:23:28Right. This is it. I'm hot.
0:23:28 > 0:23:30And I've got a sweaty back.
0:23:30 > 0:23:31OK.
0:23:33 > 0:23:34What's that?
0:23:34 > 0:23:36Soap.
0:23:36 > 0:23:37Right.
0:23:37 > 0:23:40So, I'm going to close my eyes and I'm going to count down from 20...
0:23:40 > 0:23:42Just start at ten. I'm going to count down from 20
0:23:42 > 0:23:45and you're going to tell me what's going on. OK? Steve...
0:23:47 > 0:23:5120, 19, 18, 17... I didn't want to tell you like this.
0:23:51 > 0:23:54..16, 15, 14, 13...
0:23:54 > 0:23:56Steve... ..12, 11, 10...
0:23:56 > 0:23:58OK, OK.
0:23:58 > 0:24:01..nine, eight, seven, six, five...
0:24:01 > 0:24:02I'm pregnant.
0:24:02 > 0:24:03HE SILENTLY NODS
0:24:04 > 0:24:07Sorry, I think I misheard you. Can you say that again?
0:24:09 > 0:24:11I'm...I'm pregnant.
0:24:15 > 0:24:17Is this what you've been wanting to tell me?
0:24:19 > 0:24:20I, er...
0:24:22 > 0:24:23Lee...
0:24:26 > 0:24:27So, you're not going to dump me?
0:24:27 > 0:24:29SHE LAUGHS
0:24:29 > 0:24:32No, of course not. Why would I dump you?
0:24:32 > 0:24:34There's about a million reasons.
0:24:38 > 0:24:40I didn't want to tell you like this.
0:24:40 > 0:24:42I wanted to do a nice pregnancy thing.
0:24:42 > 0:24:44No, I'm sorry I don't know anything.
0:24:44 > 0:24:45I don't... You can't be pregnant...
0:24:45 > 0:24:49This is silly... I don't know how to do...
0:24:49 > 0:24:50anything. Have you done a test?
0:24:50 > 0:24:52Yeah, of course. What did it say?
0:24:52 > 0:24:53It said I'm pregnant.
0:24:56 > 0:24:57(Fuck.)
0:24:58 > 0:25:00SILENTLY MOUTHS
0:25:06 > 0:25:08I'll join the library. Get a book on it.
0:25:08 > 0:25:10We can go to classes.
0:25:10 > 0:25:12Oh, yeah. OK. Good.
0:25:14 > 0:25:17Fuck that, actually - we'll have to talk to people.
0:25:17 > 0:25:19I'll get a book on it. There'll be an app.
0:25:19 > 0:25:22I'll need a smartphone. I can't afford one.
0:25:23 > 0:25:25I'll get a job.
0:25:25 > 0:25:27I'll get a smartphone.
0:25:27 > 0:25:29And then I'll get myself an app all about how to be a dad.
0:25:33 > 0:25:34(Fuck...)
0:25:37 > 0:25:40(Fucking hell. How am I going to be someone else's dad?)
0:25:42 > 0:25:43Is this going to be OK?
0:26:02 > 0:26:03HE SIGHS
0:26:07 > 0:26:08Oh, my God, did I hurt you?
0:26:08 > 0:26:11Oh, don't be silly. Is he easy to squash? He?
0:26:11 > 0:26:13God, I threw you off the bed this morning!
0:26:13 > 0:26:15It's a boy, is it? I fucking hope so.
0:26:15 > 0:26:18FIREWORKS EXPLODE OUTSIDE Come on. Sit down.
0:26:18 > 0:26:21Are you OK? Do you feel sick?
0:26:21 > 0:26:22Are you going to be sick?
0:26:22 > 0:26:24Do you want me to get you a bowl?
0:26:24 > 0:26:26Is that OK?
0:26:26 > 0:26:27Wow, that looks really comfy.
0:26:27 > 0:26:29Sit on it.
0:26:29 > 0:26:30MUSIC: "Boom Bang A Bang" by Lulu
0:26:32 > 0:26:33MUSIC OVER CONVERSATION
0:26:35 > 0:26:39# I notice it most when we're kissin'
0:26:39 > 0:26:43# Come closer and love me tonight
0:26:43 > 0:26:45# That's right
0:26:45 > 0:26:48# Come closer and cuddle me tight. #
0:26:48 > 0:26:50Woo-hoo-hoo-hoo!
0:26:58 > 0:27:01# My heart goes boom bang-a-bang, boom bang-a-bang
0:27:01 > 0:27:03# When you are near
0:27:03 > 0:27:07# Boom bang-a-bang, boom bang-a-bang, loud in my ear
0:27:07 > 0:27:09# Pounding away, pounding away
0:27:09 > 0:27:11# Won't you be mine?
0:27:11 > 0:27:14# Boom bang-a-bang-bang all the time
0:27:14 > 0:27:19# It's such a lovely feeling
0:27:19 > 0:27:22# When I'm in your arms
0:27:22 > 0:27:26# Now, you are near I wanna hear your heartbeat too
0:27:26 > 0:27:30# Boom bang-a-bang-bang, I love you
0:27:30 > 0:27:34# It's such a lovely feeling
0:27:34 > 0:27:38# When I'm in your arms
0:27:38 > 0:27:42# Now, you are near I wanna hear your heartbeat too
0:27:42 > 0:27:45# Boom bang-a-bang-bang I love you. #