0:00:02 > 0:00:03This programme contains adult humour.
0:00:03 > 0:00:06Hey, I bought meself a treat yesterday, look.
0:00:07 > 0:00:08A sponge isn't a treat.
0:00:08 > 0:00:11It's a real sponge.
0:00:11 > 0:00:12It cost me 20 quid.
0:00:12 > 0:00:1520 quid?! For a sponge?!
0:00:15 > 0:00:18Where's that gold-leaf bog roll I asked for(?)
0:00:19 > 0:00:20How can that be worth 20 quid?
0:00:20 > 0:00:23You don't understand. It's a real sponge.
0:00:24 > 0:00:25What do you think that is, CGI?
0:00:25 > 0:00:27(TUTS)
0:00:27 > 0:00:30Do you remember that bloke Marvin we met in Italy?
0:00:30 > 0:00:33Used to hire out the scooters to tourists?
0:00:33 > 0:00:34No.
0:00:34 > 0:00:38The one-eyed albino Nigerian who looked like Bono?
0:00:38 > 0:00:40(GASPS) Oh, yeah.
0:00:40 > 0:00:42He asked me if I wanted to go into partnership with him,
0:00:42 > 0:00:45and I were thinking maybe we could give it a go.
0:00:45 > 0:00:48After all, we can't stay in the UK. I mean...
0:00:48 > 0:00:50this place is a dump, anyway.
0:00:50 > 0:00:51We could have a new life.
0:00:51 > 0:00:53A bright new start.
0:00:53 > 0:00:54Ohh.
0:00:54 > 0:00:55OK!
0:00:55 > 0:00:57Italy it is.
0:00:57 > 0:00:59(LAUGHS) I love vodka.
0:00:59 > 0:01:02GIGGLES
0:01:02 > 0:01:04Hey, I wonder how thingy is.
0:01:04 > 0:01:06- Who?- Thingy.
0:01:06 > 0:01:07Thingy?
0:01:07 > 0:01:09- You know who I mean. - I haven't a clue.
0:01:09 > 0:01:10Girlie.
0:01:10 > 0:01:12Which girlie?
0:01:12 > 0:01:13She's really short.
0:01:13 > 0:01:14Give us a clue.
0:01:14 > 0:01:16- You know, me baby. - Jenny?
0:01:16 > 0:01:18What?
0:01:18 > 0:01:20No. That's what your baby's called Jenny.
0:01:20 > 0:01:22Oh, yeah. Of course.
0:01:22 > 0:01:25You know, some days I forget I've got a memory.
0:01:44 > 0:01:46Jenny's gone round her mam's.
0:01:46 > 0:01:48And what are your plans?
0:01:48 > 0:01:51Sit on the sofa till she gets back, rolling a succession of spliffs?
0:01:51 > 0:01:54Hmm. A tantalising proposition, but no.
0:01:54 > 0:01:57I'm going to go and book two plane tickets for Trapani.
0:01:57 > 0:01:59Isn't that near Swansea?
0:01:59 > 0:02:02All right, Google Earth(!) It's in Italy.
0:02:02 > 0:02:04We're moving over there.
0:02:04 > 0:02:06I'm going to run a vehicle-hire business.
0:02:06 > 0:02:09What? Loaning a couple of scooters to tourists?
0:02:09 > 0:02:11Yeah.
0:02:11 > 0:02:13KNOCKING
0:02:13 > 0:02:16There's more to life than selling weed to knobheads.
0:02:19 > 0:02:21- Well, well, talk of the devil. - Moz.
0:02:21 > 0:02:22I didn't know you were back.
0:02:22 > 0:02:27Arrived under cover of night. Since then I've been under cover of duvet.
0:02:30 > 0:02:33So, two quarters of Afghani,
0:02:33 > 0:02:35a half of skunk
0:02:35 > 0:02:37and a quarter of White Widow, yeah?
0:02:37 > 0:02:39We're going to write some songs.
0:02:41 > 0:02:42You back in Manchester for good now?
0:02:42 > 0:02:44I'm going to Italy.
0:02:44 > 0:02:48You're looking at Trapani scooter king numero uno.
0:02:48 > 0:02:50We did some gigs in Italy.
0:02:51 > 0:02:53These fans made a pizza of me face.
0:02:53 > 0:02:55We've all thought about it.
0:02:55 > 0:02:59Hey, since you've been away, this lot, they've gone supernova.
0:02:59 > 0:03:01That documentary Yentob did on us...
0:03:02 > 0:03:04...that was the turning point.
0:03:04 > 0:03:08Within a month, we went from total cult thing to being proper stars.
0:03:08 > 0:03:13Don't worry. I'll always think of you as a pair of cults.
0:03:13 > 0:03:15We're enjoying mainstream penetration.
0:03:15 > 0:03:17Who wouldn't(!)
0:03:17 > 0:03:21We've even got our own action figures coming out.
0:03:21 > 0:03:23- Action figures? Are you serious? - Check 'em out.
0:03:23 > 0:03:27That's me...and that's him.
0:03:28 > 0:03:29Hours of fun(!)
0:03:29 > 0:03:32I'm fully pose-able.
0:03:32 > 0:03:33We're both fully pose-able.
0:03:33 > 0:03:35All right.
0:03:35 > 0:03:37You get loads of different kinds of accessories.
0:03:37 > 0:03:39I come with my own mini mini-Moog.
0:03:39 > 0:03:41I come with a mini giant copper egg.
0:03:41 > 0:03:48I can just hatch out of it again...and again...and again.
0:03:48 > 0:03:50It looks like our old boiler.
0:03:52 > 0:03:53Hmm.
0:03:56 > 0:04:00I'm going to give you both me... as a present.
0:04:00 > 0:04:02And I'm going to give you me.
0:04:03 > 0:04:05The set!
0:04:05 > 0:04:07You never think you're going to live to see
0:04:07 > 0:04:09the day your mates are miniaturised.
0:04:09 > 0:04:11Your codpiece is out of proportion.
0:04:11 > 0:04:14I said for 'em to make it bigger.
0:04:14 > 0:04:17No, that's what I'm saying.
0:04:17 > 0:04:18It looks too big.
0:04:18 > 0:04:21No, it doesn't!
0:04:21 > 0:04:23You could have a kid's eye out with that.
0:04:40 > 0:04:42KNOCKING
0:04:45 > 0:04:46Blimey, it's United Colours of Benetton.
0:04:46 > 0:04:48Morris...
0:04:48 > 0:04:51Always knew you'd come crawling back.
0:04:52 > 0:04:54Actually, we flew.
0:04:54 > 0:04:56Nice to see you.
0:04:59 > 0:05:02Likewise.
0:05:03 > 0:05:07The gang's had a few line-up changes since I last saw you.
0:05:07 > 0:05:10It's good to have a proper gang-sized gang.
0:05:10 > 0:05:12I never expected I'd see Ivan The Horrible again!
0:05:13 > 0:05:16Cartoon Head's taking care of his little brother.
0:05:17 > 0:05:18Nikolai's one of us now.
0:05:18 > 0:05:20Aren't you? You dick!
0:05:20 > 0:05:22Steve hit me!
0:05:22 > 0:05:24Is not fair.
0:05:25 > 0:05:26Ow!
0:05:26 > 0:05:29Isn't this a bit like Daddy Day Care for you?
0:05:29 > 0:05:31Whoa, blud!
0:05:32 > 0:05:36This is totally a bed.
0:05:36 > 0:05:39I won't get more cosy than this.
0:05:39 > 0:05:44I'm telling you... I could fall asleep like that.
0:05:44 > 0:05:47Is soft, but not too soft.
0:05:47 > 0:05:50For the first time in me life,
0:05:50 > 0:05:55I is truly...lying down...
0:05:57 > 0:05:58Where's the lady of the house?
0:05:58 > 0:06:00What, Torchwood? She's in the loo. Why?
0:06:00 > 0:06:02We've got some business.
0:06:02 > 0:06:04Drug business.
0:06:04 > 0:06:05Shut it, Scrappy-Doo!
0:06:06 > 0:06:08- Are you lot working for Nicki? - ALL: Yeah.
0:06:08 > 0:06:10- - NIKOLAI: Da. - - PAUL: No!
0:06:10 > 0:06:15We don't work for her. We work with her. Psycho Paul's in charge.
0:06:15 > 0:06:16Oh, it's you lot.
0:06:17 > 0:06:19Have you done what I told you?
0:06:19 > 0:06:20- - Yeah. - - Da.
0:06:22 > 0:06:24Yeah. We did, yeah.
0:06:28 > 0:06:30Two weights of Afghani.
0:06:32 > 0:06:33Nice.
0:06:36 > 0:06:38You know the people, you know the prices.
0:06:38 > 0:06:40Do you know, I can never remember the prices.
0:06:40 > 0:06:42I recognise the people, but the prices...
0:06:46 > 0:06:47Laters, Nicki.
0:07:03 > 0:07:05All right, Kitten? What you reading?
0:07:05 > 0:07:07Oh, it's the new Dan Brown.
0:07:07 > 0:07:09Any good?
0:07:09 > 0:07:12Well, either he's lost his touch or I've lost mine...
0:07:12 > 0:07:14RUSTLING
0:07:14 > 0:07:16What have you got there?
0:07:16 > 0:07:18Binoculars. Top of the range.
0:07:18 > 0:07:24I've never really understood. What exactly is it binoculars are for?
0:07:24 > 0:07:26- They can help you see things properly.- Really?
0:07:26 > 0:07:28Sor...sorry, Carol.
0:07:28 > 0:07:29I-I didn't mean you.
0:07:29 > 0:07:32I mean binoculars help people who can already see
0:07:32 > 0:07:35see things even further and even clearer.
0:07:35 > 0:07:37That must be smashing for you.
0:07:37 > 0:07:40Well, once you've seen one thing, you've seen everything, really.
0:07:40 > 0:07:41So what do you want 'em for?
0:07:41 > 0:07:45I'm keeping an eye on this little cold-storage warehouse out the back here.
0:07:45 > 0:07:47Is that a thing people do?
0:07:47 > 0:07:49Warehouse watching?
0:07:49 > 0:07:51It is if they want to make money.
0:07:51 > 0:07:53You're going to bet on a warehouse?!
0:07:53 > 0:07:54That's right, Kitten.
0:07:54 > 0:08:00Life's not as simple as Dan Brown would have us believe.
0:08:05 > 0:08:08So, how come you've got Psycho Paul's gang doing all your dealing?
0:08:08 > 0:08:09It's a bit dangerous, innit?
0:08:09 > 0:08:12It's like RoboCop being your chiropodist.
0:08:12 > 0:08:14They do as they're told.
0:08:14 > 0:08:16After all, they're getting 60% of the profits.
0:08:16 > 0:08:19What, they earn more than you?!
0:08:19 > 0:08:22You've gone mad wi' the lack of power.
0:08:22 > 0:08:24But it cost me nothing to begin with.
0:08:24 > 0:08:29It's just the gear that PC seizes on busts, and every penny is pure profit.
0:08:29 > 0:08:32It's not like when you were piddling about
0:08:32 > 0:08:34selling tenths to a bunch of social ingrates.
0:08:34 > 0:08:36What?! I earned a good living!
0:08:36 > 0:08:37No, you didn't!
0:08:37 > 0:08:40We never had any holidays, we never any had treats.
0:08:40 > 0:08:42You smoked most of the stock yourself,
0:08:42 > 0:08:45and any money you did make, you pissed away down the Horses!
0:08:45 > 0:08:48Yeah? And the main reason I went down the Horses
0:08:48 > 0:08:53- was to get away from your nagging. - Oh, really? Is that a fact?
0:08:53 > 0:08:56And the irony is... that most of it was nagging me
0:08:56 > 0:08:58to stop dealing to get a proper job!
0:09:02 > 0:09:05I can't stop. Massive riot kicked off down the 99p shop.
0:09:05 > 0:09:08They've done literally pounds' worth of damage.
0:09:08 > 0:09:10But the good news is,
0:09:10 > 0:09:13as of this morning, you have been taken off our most-wanted list.
0:09:13 > 0:09:14What?
0:09:14 > 0:09:18- I pulled a few strings. - Strings? You've access to strings(?)
0:09:18 > 0:09:21It all started when that heroin
0:09:21 > 0:09:24disappeared under mysterious circumstances.
0:09:24 > 0:09:27- Sold like hot cakes. - So what happens next?
0:09:27 > 0:09:30Well, it might take up to six months,
0:09:30 > 0:09:33but eventually, the police'll send you a letter of apology
0:09:33 > 0:09:34and some M&S vouchers.
0:09:34 > 0:09:37Wow, fella!
0:09:37 > 0:09:40Great! Great!
0:09:40 > 0:09:42So how long are you going to be staying here?
0:09:42 > 0:09:44Well, for ever.
0:09:44 > 0:09:46What about your big plans? I thought you were moving to Italy?
0:09:46 > 0:09:48I can't really be arsed.
0:09:48 > 0:09:52Well, there's not room for the four of us to live here.
0:09:52 > 0:09:54No. Now you can move back to your place.
0:09:54 > 0:09:56This is my place.
0:09:58 > 0:09:59This is our place!
0:10:00 > 0:10:04- I thought you still had your own place.- Yeah, but...
0:10:04 > 0:10:07Well, me and her had an argument and she chucked me out of my place.
0:10:07 > 0:10:12And then you let me take over this place and it sort of became... my place.
0:10:12 > 0:10:15- But then I forgave him... - Well, I forgave you.
0:10:15 > 0:10:20I forgave him and then I moved back in here, and so it became our place.
0:10:20 > 0:10:23So what happened to your old place?
0:10:23 > 0:10:26Well, I gave it up. It's somebody else's place now.
0:10:26 > 0:10:27Talk about stupid-idity!
0:10:27 > 0:10:30Well, I didn't know you were going to come back!
0:10:30 > 0:10:33I thought there were more chance of Richey Manic galloping up on Shergar!
0:10:33 > 0:10:36The contract for this place is in my name.
0:10:36 > 0:10:37CHAIR CLATTERS
0:10:37 > 0:10:41And I have returned to claim my ancestral seat.
0:10:43 > 0:10:45Moz is back...
0:10:47 > 0:10:49...and he's in full effect.
0:10:49 > 0:10:51(RADIO CRACKLES) 'K-23, where are you?'
0:10:51 > 0:10:52'Backup required.'
0:10:52 > 0:10:55Oh...I should go.
0:10:56 > 0:10:58Oh, don't worry, love.
0:10:58 > 0:11:02I'll find somewhere... much better than this dump.
0:11:02 > 0:11:05Oi! I've just got this place how I wanted it!
0:11:06 > 0:11:08Sorry.
0:11:12 > 0:11:14Good luck in your new home(!)
0:11:41 > 0:11:44Who's been mucking about in here now?
0:11:46 > 0:11:48PHONE RINGS
0:11:50 > 0:11:52- Hi, Jen.- 'Hiya.'
0:11:52 > 0:11:53I were just going to call you.
0:11:53 > 0:11:55- Guess what?- 'What?'
0:11:55 > 0:11:57Got some good news.
0:11:58 > 0:12:01All the charges against me have been dropped.
0:12:01 > 0:12:02LAUGHS
0:12:02 > 0:12:04We don't have to fly to the Mediterranean.
0:12:04 > 0:12:07We're free to hang around Salford.
0:12:07 > 0:12:09'But what about your master plan?
0:12:09 > 0:12:10'The fresh start?
0:12:10 > 0:12:12'Our brand-new life?'
0:12:12 > 0:12:15I can't really be arsed. Can you?
0:12:15 > 0:12:18'Well...no, not really.'
0:12:18 > 0:12:20Attagirl.
0:12:20 > 0:12:22'Anyway, I'm going to stay at me mum's tonight.
0:12:22 > 0:12:26'Thought I might bond wi' me baby. She is nearly two.
0:12:26 > 0:12:29'And Mum's cooking chicken dinner.'
0:12:29 > 0:12:30Okey-doke.
0:12:30 > 0:12:34Well, I might pop round the Horses for a swift one. Warm up.
0:12:34 > 0:12:37It's all got a bit frosty here. Bye!
0:12:41 > 0:12:42Mrs Rupani.
0:12:42 > 0:12:44How are you?
0:12:44 > 0:12:46Very well, thank you, Mr Moz.
0:12:46 > 0:12:49Your rent has been very prompt the last few months.
0:12:49 > 0:12:51Like never before.
0:12:51 > 0:12:54Well, you know how it is - some of us are mature, some of us are manure.
0:12:54 > 0:12:55What?
0:12:55 > 0:12:59Nowt. What you up to?
0:12:59 > 0:13:02Up to? I am coming to monitor the redecoration
0:13:02 > 0:13:04of the flat vacated by Reverend Fistwick.
0:13:04 > 0:13:07- Hello, Miss Nicki. - Hiya.
0:13:07 > 0:13:10Actually, you might be able to help.
0:13:10 > 0:13:13I'm looking for a flat... in a bit of a hurry.
0:13:14 > 0:13:17You and Mr Moz separating?
0:13:17 > 0:13:19It was only ever a marriage of inconvenience.
0:13:19 > 0:13:22As I was just saying, the flat next door will be available from Saturday.
0:13:26 > 0:13:28The rent would be the same as for next door.
0:13:28 > 0:13:31No pets, no children, no central heating.
0:13:31 > 0:13:32I'll take it.
0:13:32 > 0:13:34You probably want to think it over for a day or so.
0:13:34 > 0:13:38I'll take it. And the decorating will be finished by Saturday?
0:13:38 > 0:13:39That is correct, isn't it?
0:13:39 > 0:13:41That is correct.
0:13:41 > 0:13:44What is this?
0:13:46 > 0:13:48A big splash.
0:13:49 > 0:13:52Nicki, are you sure you want to be here?
0:13:52 > 0:13:55Are you sure you wouldn't prefer to be anywhere but here?
0:13:55 > 0:13:58This is definitely the right move. Definitely!
0:13:58 > 0:14:01Where one door closes, another door opens.
0:14:01 > 0:14:03I'll get that fixed.
0:14:09 > 0:14:11VEHICLE APPROACHES
0:14:23 > 0:14:26Oh, don't stress. We'll be here for two minutes.
0:14:26 > 0:14:29That's what you said about the Body Shop.
0:14:29 > 0:14:32We were in there for nearly an hour! My nip and tuck took less time.
0:14:32 > 0:14:34New cranberry and peach skin-care range?
0:14:34 > 0:14:36Of course I'm going to want to use up all the free samples!
0:14:36 > 0:14:39I can't be late for my anger management class!
0:14:39 > 0:14:42Oh! A few minutes ain't going to make any difference.
0:14:42 > 0:14:45Yes, it will! For Christ's sake, Brian!
0:14:45 > 0:14:49Your relaxed attitude is stifling me.
0:14:49 > 0:14:52Yeah? Well, maybe I wouldn't have to be so... relaxed
0:14:52 > 0:14:56if you weren't so angsty and...breasty!
0:14:57 > 0:14:59You said you liked my tits.
0:14:59 > 0:15:02I said I didn't mind working around 'em.
0:15:02 > 0:15:05Well, at least I haven't got a face
0:15:05 > 0:15:07like a dog's arse that's gone through a windscreen!
0:15:09 > 0:15:12I'll have you know I am not just good looking...
0:15:12 > 0:15:16- (SCOFFS) - ...I am morbidly gorgeous!
0:15:16 > 0:15:21Oi! Minger The Merciless, either keep the volume down,
0:15:21 > 0:15:23or turn it up so I can hear what you're saying properly.
0:15:23 > 0:15:26I have nothing more to say.
0:15:26 > 0:15:29Neither have I, Brian.
0:15:29 > 0:15:31Me and my tits have got better things to do.
0:15:38 > 0:15:39Wow!
0:15:41 > 0:15:43- Did he just dump you? - I dumped him.
0:15:43 > 0:15:46Right... Cos it sort of looked like he dumped you.
0:15:46 > 0:15:50I dumped him. Now let us never gossip of this again.
0:16:04 > 0:16:06So, do you still want to go through with it, then?
0:16:06 > 0:16:10Even though murder is almost definitely a sin?
0:16:12 > 0:16:14Smashing.
0:16:14 > 0:16:18So, now you're not leaving the country?
0:16:18 > 0:16:20No. I want me old life back.
0:16:20 > 0:16:23Why? It was shit.
0:16:23 > 0:16:27My life wasn't that bad. Homeless people used to envy me.
0:16:27 > 0:16:30But you can go anywhere in the world you want.
0:16:30 > 0:16:31I wish I could be like you.
0:16:33 > 0:16:36I'm glad I'm not like you. Going out with man wi' tits.
0:16:36 > 0:16:39I say don't mess wi' the factory settings.
0:16:39 > 0:16:42Yeah, well, that's all in the past now.
0:16:42 > 0:16:44I shall never trust another bosom.
0:16:44 > 0:16:47Hey, you should throw a big homecoming party.
0:16:47 > 0:16:48I'll organise it all for you.
0:16:48 > 0:16:51No way.
0:16:51 > 0:16:53It'll be just like that time you brought them people back from that club.
0:16:53 > 0:16:57MUSIC: "Bela Lugosi's Dead" by Bauhaus
0:17:01 > 0:17:04- Happy New Year! - BANG
0:17:05 > 0:17:08I don't want to make a big song and dance about me being back.
0:17:08 > 0:17:09So not a word to anyone.
0:17:09 > 0:17:12- Is it a hush-hush secret? - No.
0:17:12 > 0:17:13It's not a secret.
0:17:13 > 0:17:16I'd just rather folk found out in a more...organic way.
0:17:16 > 0:17:19Blimey, listen to the Wholemeal Kid.
0:17:19 > 0:17:23Right. I'm off down Zyklon B's.
0:17:23 > 0:17:24Ooh, hi-hi.
0:17:26 > 0:17:27So, it's all change, then?
0:17:27 > 0:17:30Yep. As of Saturday, I'm based next door.
0:17:30 > 0:17:34- You're movin' in wi' Fist? - No, I am not moving in with Fist.
0:17:34 > 0:17:38He's moved out. Although I've lived with worse.
0:17:38 > 0:17:40So, where's he gone?
0:17:40 > 0:17:44Nobody knows. We can only assume he's left to work on a kibbutz.
0:17:44 > 0:17:48So you'll have your dad across the landing and your ex living next door
0:17:48 > 0:17:51making a success of your old job?
0:17:51 > 0:17:52Italy not looking so bad now.
0:17:52 > 0:17:54Ciao, bella.
0:17:56 > 0:18:00Listen, Nicki, if there's anything I can do to help, anything at all,
0:18:00 > 0:18:02then just say the word.
0:18:02 > 0:18:05OK. Well, I'm going out in a few minutes,
0:18:05 > 0:18:10so what would be really helpful would be if by the time I got back,
0:18:10 > 0:18:13all my stuff that's in the hall had been moved into next door's bedroom.
0:18:18 > 0:18:20'(SIGHS) Damn! I didn't mean that kind of anything.'
0:18:23 > 0:18:26Ooh, God! Sorry.
0:18:26 > 0:18:27- Are you all right?- Yeah.
0:18:27 > 0:18:30- Are you moving in? - I'm already in.
0:18:30 > 0:18:32Oh, my gosh! I thought I knew everybody.
0:18:32 > 0:18:34I'm Tilly. I live in number 8.
0:18:35 > 0:18:36Moz.
0:18:36 > 0:18:38Moz. Moz. Wow!
0:18:38 > 0:18:42Moz. That's like an olde English name.
0:18:42 > 0:18:46Quite probably. I've had it for as long as I can remember.
0:18:46 > 0:18:49- When did you say you were moving in? - I've lived here five months.
0:18:49 > 0:18:51Never!
0:18:51 > 0:18:53- Oh, hiya, Till. - Hi, Nicki.
0:18:54 > 0:18:57Hi, Cartoon Head. Are you OK?
0:18:57 > 0:19:01You look a little run down. Do you need an Echinacea headband?
0:19:02 > 0:19:06- Where you guys going?- I'm going to put my earnings in an ISA.
0:19:06 > 0:19:09- CH is riding shotgun. See ya. - Bye.
0:19:10 > 0:19:11Hello, Tilly.
0:19:11 > 0:19:14- Hi, Carol.- Hang on...
0:19:14 > 0:19:16How do you even know Tilly's there?
0:19:16 > 0:19:21Well, I recognise the perfume. It's Calvin Klein Euphonium, isn't it?
0:19:21 > 0:19:22It is!
0:19:22 > 0:19:24It's lovely, that. See you later.
0:19:24 > 0:19:26Bye.
0:19:27 > 0:19:29So you're not moving in to Fist's old flat?
0:19:29 > 0:19:32No. Nicki's movin' in there.
0:19:32 > 0:19:36- I've moved back into my old flat. - Oh...so you've been here before?
0:19:36 > 0:19:38I've been here 16 years' worth of before.
0:19:39 > 0:19:41- Can I check it out? - Do.
0:19:41 > 0:19:46Ooh, so you'll want to give the whole place a fresh new look, huh?
0:19:46 > 0:19:51- I'm re-imagining as we speak. - I do interior design work.
0:19:51 > 0:19:53Do you want me to bring some swatches over?
0:19:53 > 0:19:55- I don't wear one. - No, fabric samples.
0:19:55 > 0:19:57I'll bring some over.
0:19:57 > 0:20:01Oh...I love all fabric.
0:20:03 > 0:20:07For the lounge, either a modular sofa
0:20:07 > 0:20:10or some microfibre throw pillows with deep button work.
0:20:10 > 0:20:12What a choice.
0:20:12 > 0:20:14(WHISPERS) Yeah(!)
0:20:14 > 0:20:18Oh, I have my sacred carpentry class.
0:20:19 > 0:20:23- I'll catch you later. - Live long and prosper.
0:20:26 > 0:20:27What you doing?
0:20:27 > 0:20:30Moving Nicki's stuff in.
0:20:30 > 0:20:34- Th...thing is, I'm pretty busy. - Well,
0:20:34 > 0:20:38if you help me shift it, I'll be out your hair in half the time. Deal?
0:20:40 > 0:20:41Deal.
0:20:54 > 0:20:56- Argh! - Hello, Moz.
0:20:56 > 0:20:58Sorry.
0:20:58 > 0:21:02Judith! You made me jump. What you doing in here?
0:21:02 > 0:21:04Oh, I'm just hanging out.
0:21:04 > 0:21:07I didn't know you were back.
0:21:07 > 0:21:10Yeah, well, I'm trying to keep it low-key.
0:21:10 > 0:21:13So...I heard you split up with Cartoon Head.
0:21:13 > 0:21:17- Yes. He really hates me now. - What makes you say that?
0:21:17 > 0:21:20He took a contract out on my life.
0:21:20 > 0:21:22Does sound like he's gone off you a bit.
0:21:22 > 0:21:25CH found out that I was two-timing him with someone else.
0:21:25 > 0:21:27- Sorry.- Shit!
0:21:27 > 0:21:31I hope the gentleman in question was worth the risk.
0:21:31 > 0:21:34It were me brother, Marco.
0:21:34 > 0:21:36Wow!
0:21:36 > 0:21:40Cartoon Head's already put Marco in hospital. He's on three drips.
0:21:40 > 0:21:43- So what you going to do? - Well...
0:21:43 > 0:21:45um...we had a serious talk about this,
0:21:45 > 0:21:48and we realised there's only one sensible option.
0:21:48 > 0:21:52- We're going to kill Cartoon Head. - Sorry.
0:21:52 > 0:21:54But you're pregnant!
0:21:54 > 0:21:57That doesn't mean I can't lead an active social life.
0:21:57 > 0:21:59But we're talking about murder here.
0:21:59 > 0:22:02Worse than that, we're talking murder one -
0:22:02 > 0:22:04the highest number of murder there is.
0:22:04 > 0:22:06If I don't kill Cartoon Head, he's going to kill me.
0:22:06 > 0:22:09Can't you just...just disappear?
0:22:09 > 0:22:13I tried to disappear. But I keep reappearing.
0:22:13 > 0:22:16Tell him about Chessington World of Adventure.
0:22:16 > 0:22:20Me and Marco went there to escape, but Cartoon Head caught up with us.
0:22:20 > 0:22:23He attacked Marco on the log flume.
0:22:23 > 0:22:26- Really? - There's photographic evidence.
0:22:26 > 0:22:29I've got it on two 10x8s, a mouse mat and a key ring.
0:22:29 > 0:22:31You can't go head-to-head with Cartoon Head.
0:22:31 > 0:22:33I mean, come on!
0:22:33 > 0:22:37He's a tooled-up gangster, with over 20 kills under his belt.
0:22:37 > 0:22:38Whereas in the red corner,
0:22:38 > 0:22:41you've got a mild-mannered odd-job man and a pregnant girl!
0:22:42 > 0:22:46Well...we've got the element of surprise.
0:22:46 > 0:22:51- In what way? - Um, in that, in that he's...
0:22:51 > 0:22:54not expecting to be killed...
0:22:54 > 0:22:56by us.
0:22:56 > 0:22:58Sorry.
0:23:20 > 0:23:22RATTLING
0:23:22 > 0:23:23Right.
0:23:23 > 0:23:25Methinks 'tis the bonging hour.
0:23:25 > 0:23:27MOBILE PHONE RINGS
0:23:34 > 0:23:36Troy. You all right, our kid?
0:23:36 > 0:23:38'All right, bro. Brian said you were back.'
0:23:38 > 0:23:42Oh, did he? God bless old Klaxon-Gob(!)
0:23:42 > 0:23:45'Hey, fancy comin' down for a celebratory rave?
0:23:45 > 0:23:48'Floorgasm are doin' a night of Future Skool and Crab Step.'
0:23:48 > 0:23:51Tempting, but I don't want to make a big song and dance about being back.
0:23:51 > 0:23:53Just going to stay in and chillax.
0:23:53 > 0:23:56Maybe I'll even chilleditate.
0:23:56 > 0:23:58- 'You sure? Cos it's going to be ment...' - BEEP
0:24:03 > 0:24:04KNOCK AT DOOR
0:24:04 > 0:24:06SIGHS
0:24:06 > 0:24:09(AS AL PACINO) Just when I thought I was gonna get out of it,
0:24:09 > 0:24:12dey pull me back in!
0:24:14 > 0:24:15Tania.
0:24:15 > 0:24:17All right, Moz?
0:24:19 > 0:24:21Brian said you were back.
0:24:21 > 0:24:23What?!
0:24:23 > 0:24:26I told Count Baldula not to say a word.
0:24:26 > 0:24:28Did you not want me to know?
0:24:28 > 0:24:31Er...no. Look, I don't mind you knowing.
0:24:31 > 0:24:34- It's just every bugger else. - Aw!
0:24:34 > 0:24:36That's sweet.
0:24:36 > 0:24:40Brian said Nicki's moving in to Fist's old flat.
0:24:40 > 0:24:43Blimey! Did he read you the minutes of the entire meeting?
0:24:43 > 0:24:46Yes, Nicki's moving back in next door with PC Plop.
0:24:46 > 0:24:48I don't know what happened to Fist.
0:24:48 > 0:24:51Fist's reintegrated into society.
0:24:52 > 0:24:53Really?
0:24:54 > 0:24:56I think society's probably going to find that quite hard.
0:24:56 > 0:24:58Tilly helped him out.
0:24:58 > 0:25:02- Tilly...? The American lass? - She got him
0:25:02 > 0:25:04taking his medication again.
0:25:16 > 0:25:18Helped him value himself more.
0:25:24 > 0:25:27Pretty soon he was right as rain.
0:25:45 > 0:25:47- LOL.- Yeah.
0:25:49 > 0:25:52Have you seen Psycho Paul? He's not answering his mobile.
0:25:53 > 0:25:57We were supposed to go to Bikram Hot Yoga together.
0:25:57 > 0:25:58Yoga?
0:25:58 > 0:26:00Paul just watches.
0:26:00 > 0:26:03I've not seen him since this morning. Hey!
0:26:03 > 0:26:06Maybe he's reintegrated into society, too.
0:26:06 > 0:26:09Jesus! I hope it's not contagious.
0:26:09 > 0:26:11Hi-hi!
0:26:11 > 0:26:13There were a sale on at World of Leather.
0:26:13 > 0:26:14Hey, you!
0:26:14 > 0:26:16I wanted to keep quiet about being back, didn't I?
0:26:16 > 0:26:18But I made the mistake of telling the gay CNN.
0:26:18 > 0:26:21Me? I've hardly told a soul.
0:26:21 > 0:26:24CHEERING
0:26:24 > 0:26:26A toast to Moz.
0:26:26 > 0:26:30He was here, then he went away, then he came back again...
0:26:30 > 0:26:32just like the way each season
0:26:32 > 0:26:37goes away each year, only to return the next.
0:26:37 > 0:26:40First, spring makes itself known when each bud is...
0:26:40 > 0:26:43Please do not do say about seasons. Everybody know season.
0:26:45 > 0:26:47It good news to have you back, Moz.
0:26:47 > 0:26:49Yeah, but you still look a bit of a dick.
0:26:49 > 0:26:51Yeah. Whatever.
0:26:51 > 0:26:52Let's do this thing.
0:26:52 > 0:26:54FEEDBACK WHINES
0:26:55 > 0:26:57MUSIC:" The Boys Are Back In Town" by Thin Lizzy
0:27:01 > 0:27:03# Guess who just got back today
0:27:03 > 0:27:06# Those wild-eyed boys Who've been away
0:27:06 > 0:27:10# Haven't changed haven't much to say
0:27:10 > 0:27:12# But, man, I still think them cats are crazy... #
0:27:12 > 0:27:16I'm going to do a Beatles song next. Get Back.
0:27:16 > 0:27:19# ...How you were Where you could be found
0:27:19 > 0:27:21# Told them you were living downtown
0:27:21 > 0:27:24# Driving the old men crazy
0:27:24 > 0:27:26# The boys are back in town
0:27:26 > 0:27:28# The boys are back in town
0:27:30 > 0:27:31# I said the boys are... #
0:27:31 > 0:27:32(MACHINE SLOWS) # ... back in town. #
0:27:32 > 0:27:35FIZZLES TO SILENCE
0:27:36 > 0:27:40Oh, well. I said I didn't want to make a big song and dance about, it anyway.
0:27:40 > 0:27:42FEEDBACK WHINES
0:27:43 > 0:27:45- So what's your plan? - Human organ trading.
0:27:48 > 0:27:51- I never thought I'd kill someone. - It's beautiful.
0:27:52 > 0:27:54The old team back together again.
0:27:55 > 0:27:59- I can't believe this place. - Leave her alone!
0:27:59 > 0:28:00Nikolai...
0:28:00 > 0:28:02Show Morris your penis.
0:28:22 > 0:28:24Subtitles by RED BEE MEDIA LTD
0:28:24 > 0:28:27E-mail: subtitling@bbc.co.uk