0:00:17 > 0:00:20APPLAUSE AND CHEERING
0:00:26 > 0:00:29Hello, and welcome to Insert Name Here, the show where we discover
0:00:29 > 0:00:32surprising facts about people with just one thing in common -
0:00:32 > 0:00:33they've all got the same name.
0:00:33 > 0:00:35Joining me, six of my favourite people,
0:00:35 > 0:00:38each bearing their own unique moniker. Please welcome Tom Davis,
0:00:38 > 0:00:41Kate Williams and their team captain, Josh Widdicombe,
0:00:41 > 0:00:43and on the other side, Aisling Bea, Robert Peston,
0:00:43 > 0:00:45and their captain, Richard Osman.
0:00:45 > 0:00:47APPLAUSE
0:00:53 > 0:00:56Robert, you've got a very noble, ancient name, are you happy with it?
0:00:56 > 0:01:01Yes, it is an ancient name, but actually cos I'm Jewish I've got
0:01:01 > 0:01:04an alternative name on my Jewish birth certificate, which is Raphael.
0:01:04 > 0:01:06- So powerful!- Raphael!
0:01:06 > 0:01:10There was a moment when I thought it sounds so distinguished, Raphael.
0:01:10 > 0:01:12- Like one of the Turtles.- It's a bit pretentious, maybe.
0:01:12 > 0:01:14Yeah, the best of all the turtles.
0:01:14 > 0:01:16My Jewish name is Splinter.
0:01:19 > 0:01:21I'm going to move to the all-important question of,
0:01:21 > 0:01:24ce soir, which name is going to be featuring?
0:01:24 > 0:01:25They can be nimble, quick,
0:01:25 > 0:01:27and even jump over candlesticks,
0:01:27 > 0:01:29because tonight's name is Jack.
0:01:29 > 0:01:31Ooh!
0:01:36 > 0:01:39So, we'll be talking all the Jacks, including Jackies,
0:01:39 > 0:01:41Jacquelines and maybe even the odd Jacques.
0:01:41 > 0:01:44Along the way our teams will collect as many Jacks as they can,
0:01:44 > 0:01:47and at the end of the show the winning team will have the honour
0:01:47 > 0:01:49of deciding who's officially the greatest Jack of all time.
0:01:49 > 0:01:52Richard, any thoughts early on as to who that might be?
0:01:52 > 0:01:54Yes, it's a slight dilemma
0:01:54 > 0:01:58but I think I've solved it, I'm going to go for
0:01:58 > 0:02:00a gentleman called Jack Gray,
0:02:00 > 0:02:03Who was an Australian rules football player,
0:02:03 > 0:02:06who played for Footscray. It's essentially because
0:02:06 > 0:02:08I'm a really big fan of Jack Black and a big fan of Jack White
0:02:08 > 0:02:11and I couldn't choose between the two so I compromised.
0:02:12 > 0:02:16Josh, any idea who your favourite best Jack is?
0:02:16 > 0:02:20Jacks? Yeah. I thought there's a lot of fairy tale kind of Jacks
0:02:20 > 0:02:24that you learn about, kind of fictionalised Jacks.
0:02:24 > 0:02:25So there's "be nimble".
0:02:25 > 0:02:28- Yes.- There's "and the beanstalk". - Yes.
0:02:28 > 0:02:30And there's Jackie Stallone.
0:02:30 > 0:02:33Oh, yes. I have to tell you, she might not be fictional.
0:02:33 > 0:02:36- Is she not fictional?- No-one's actually seen her in the flesh.
0:02:36 > 0:02:37She doesn't feel real to me.
0:02:39 > 0:02:40Let's crack on with the show.
0:02:40 > 0:02:43It's time to pick a Jack, any Jack. Our panellists are going to choose
0:02:43 > 0:02:45a category, behind each category lurks a famous Jack,
0:02:45 > 0:02:47which our teams must then attempt to win.
0:02:47 > 0:02:49So, what have we got? We've got...
0:02:54 > 0:02:57Richard, you're going to go first. Why not pick a category?
0:02:57 > 0:02:59We will go for Action Jack please, Sue.
0:02:59 > 0:03:03Excellent stuff. A wise choice, you've chosen martial arts supremo
0:03:03 > 0:03:05Jackie Chan. Let's have a look at his stats.
0:03:16 > 0:03:19# Everybody was kung-fu fighting Huh! #
0:03:19 > 0:03:22Now, Jackie Chan was born in Hong Kong.
0:03:22 > 0:03:25- Did that just happen? - It did just happen, yeah.
0:03:25 > 0:03:26I thought I was having a stroke.
0:03:26 > 0:03:29I don't think that's one of the warning signs.
0:03:29 > 0:03:32- Oh, is it not?- No. - Smell toast and
0:03:32 > 0:03:34you can hear Carl Douglas.
0:03:35 > 0:03:37Jackie Chan was born in Hong Kong,
0:03:37 > 0:03:40one of China's biggest-ever film stars, appearing in over 100 films,
0:03:40 > 0:03:44including Heart Of Dragon, Rush Hour and, of course, The Karate Kid.
0:03:44 > 0:03:46Anybody a fan of kung fu films?
0:03:46 > 0:03:50Yeah, I'm a big fan. Big fan of Jackie Chan as well, actually.
0:03:50 > 0:03:53And I've recently been putting together this action thing,
0:03:53 > 0:03:57and a guy on Twitter sort of said, "I love Jackie Chan," and he said,
0:03:57 > 0:04:00"I know him, I can get you a meeting with Jackie Chan."
0:04:00 > 0:04:04So, I was, like, buoyed by it, I thought, "why would you lie about such a thing?"
0:04:05 > 0:04:07And I went and met this guy in KFC.
0:04:09 > 0:04:11The signs were there, Tom!
0:04:11 > 0:04:17But then this oriental guy just turned up and he basically tried to
0:04:17 > 0:04:19pretend that this was Jackie Chan.
0:04:19 > 0:04:22- No!- Yeah, it was the weirdest scenario I've ever been in.- Did he
0:04:22 > 0:04:24do anything to try and convince you that he was Jackie Chan?
0:04:24 > 0:04:26No, he looked as embarrassed as I did.
0:04:26 > 0:04:28I don't even know what he told the guy
0:04:28 > 0:04:31- to bring him along, whether he sort of like said...- Oh, he probably
0:04:31 > 0:04:33said you were George Clooney.
0:04:34 > 0:04:37Now, it's as a martial arts star we know Jackie best.
0:04:37 > 0:04:40During his film career he's earned two world records -
0:04:40 > 0:04:41one, most stunts by a living actor.
0:04:41 > 0:04:43Does anyone know the other world record?
0:04:43 > 0:04:45Least stunts by a dead actor.
0:04:47 > 0:04:49It's got something to do with credits.
0:04:49 > 0:04:50Most credits on the same film?
0:04:50 > 0:04:52- For one person?- Is right! Yes.
0:04:52 > 0:04:54- Ooh!- Most credits in one movie.
0:04:54 > 0:04:57For the 2012 movie, Chinese Zodiac,
0:04:57 > 0:05:00he was credited with 15 different roles.
0:05:00 > 0:05:01There they are.
0:05:01 > 0:05:04Plus - and I'm not making this up -
0:05:04 > 0:05:06catering coordinator.
0:05:06 > 0:05:08So, he did the catering?!
0:05:08 > 0:05:09Well, he coordinated it.
0:05:09 > 0:05:12In all fairness, he's doing nearly every job, so he's pretty much
0:05:12 > 0:05:13just feeding himself.
0:05:15 > 0:05:17He's the first 14 people in the queue, isn't he?
0:05:20 > 0:05:24I've just had a terrible realisation that there are seven of us,
0:05:24 > 0:05:26and none of us said Jack of all trades.
0:05:28 > 0:05:30- Josh, shall I tell you why? - Why?
0:05:30 > 0:05:32Cos all of us thought of it, every single one of us,
0:05:32 > 0:05:34you thought of it last, that's often the case.
0:05:36 > 0:05:38Because that expression ends, "and master of none",
0:05:38 > 0:05:41we were all a bit too respectful to Jackie Chan to say it.
0:05:41 > 0:05:42So, I think it's slightly rude
0:05:42 > 0:05:45of you, so maybe you should apologise to Jackie Chan.
0:05:45 > 0:05:46I'm sorry to Jackie Chan.
0:05:46 > 0:05:48If you want to apologise face-to-face,
0:05:48 > 0:05:49I know a guy who knows him.
0:05:49 > 0:05:51APPLAUSE
0:05:54 > 0:05:56Jackie Chan does all his own stunts. As a result,
0:05:56 > 0:05:59no insurance company will underwrite his productions.
0:05:59 > 0:06:01He's injured himself dozens of times over the years.
0:06:01 > 0:06:03Dislocated shoulder, broken fingers,
0:06:03 > 0:06:05knee damage, chin, lips, teeth, nose,
0:06:05 > 0:06:10but does anybody know how he hurt himself in the film Project A?
0:06:10 > 0:06:13Yeah, did he burn his tongue testing the soup?
0:06:15 > 0:06:17He fell - how far do we think he fell?
0:06:17 > 0:06:20Did he fall in love and break his heart?
0:06:20 > 0:06:22AUDIENCE: Awww!
0:06:22 > 0:06:24Oh! No.
0:06:24 > 0:06:27So, he fell three storeys from a clock tower and deliberately landed
0:06:27 > 0:06:29without a crash mat.
0:06:29 > 0:06:33Not only that, he did several takes - here's a couple.
0:06:38 > 0:06:40Aarrrgh!
0:06:50 > 0:06:53- GROANING - I've got to say, I don't think he did fall deliberately -
0:06:53 > 0:06:56he was desperately trying to hold on to that.
0:06:57 > 0:06:59The good news is that luckily there was a medic on the set -
0:06:59 > 0:07:01a certain Mr J Chan.
0:07:05 > 0:07:07At drama school,
0:07:07 > 0:07:09we used to love doing stunts, like, that was always that thing,
0:07:09 > 0:07:12like if you're fighting someone and, say, Richard, what you do is,
0:07:12 > 0:07:14I control this,
0:07:14 > 0:07:17so you will do onto my hand, but I'll move my hand and you go like...
0:07:17 > 0:07:19Oh, Jesus, ow!
0:07:19 > 0:07:21Oh, Richard!
0:07:21 > 0:07:24That kind of stuff, but it looks really convincing.
0:07:24 > 0:07:27If they do that as the trailer without the explanation...
0:07:27 > 0:07:29LAUGHTER, APPLAUSE
0:07:33 > 0:07:37I did, at the end of interviewing Michael Fallon,
0:07:37 > 0:07:43I did bang my head on the table, I just went like that.
0:07:43 > 0:07:46And I didn't think the camera was on, but it was.
0:07:46 > 0:07:49- And it became a bit of a thing. - Given the choice again,
0:07:49 > 0:07:52would you rather meet Michael Fallon or bang your head on a table?
0:07:52 > 0:07:54I think one thing he WOULDN'T want to do
0:07:54 > 0:07:56is bang Michael Fallon on a table.
0:08:03 > 0:08:06So, time to play for the Jack.
0:08:06 > 0:08:08And for this, we're going to go back to one of Jackie's classic
0:08:08 > 0:08:11fighting scenes. This is from his breakthrough film,
0:08:11 > 0:08:13Snake In The Eagle's Shadow.
0:08:26 > 0:08:29OK, now, what move does Jackie finally use
0:08:29 > 0:08:31to overpower his opponent?
0:08:31 > 0:08:33Three-point turn.
0:08:35 > 0:08:37Disappointing catering?
0:08:38 > 0:08:41Makes like an animal, that's all I'm going to say.
0:08:41 > 0:08:44He pretends to be a dog? And barks at him.
0:08:44 > 0:08:47- Very close to dog. - Cat.- It IS a cat.
0:08:47 > 0:08:49Let's have a look.
0:08:49 > 0:08:50CAT SCREECHES
0:08:58 > 0:09:01GROANING
0:09:06 > 0:09:09Jackie, of course, then finishes him off by pissing in his slippers.
0:09:11 > 0:09:15Listen, congratulations, Josh's team cos you get the Jack.
0:09:21 > 0:09:23Right, Josh's team, it's your turn, pick a Jack.
0:09:23 > 0:09:24I like the idea of Evil.
0:09:24 > 0:09:26- Let's go dark.- Yeah?
0:09:26 > 0:09:28Let's do it.
0:09:28 > 0:09:29"Like the idea of Evil."
0:09:29 > 0:09:31Says Josh Widdicombe!
0:09:32 > 0:09:36You've picked Victorian London's most prominent bad guy,
0:09:36 > 0:09:38- Jack the Ripper.- Boo!- Here he is.
0:09:38 > 0:09:40You're right to boo.
0:09:40 > 0:09:42Let's have a look at his stats.
0:09:55 > 0:09:59Jack the Ripper is said to have been responsible for at least
0:09:59 > 0:10:02five murders over a 12-week period, beginning in August of 1888.
0:10:02 > 0:10:06Now, Kate, your first novel is about macabre murders in Victorian London.
0:10:06 > 0:10:08- It is.- Were you influenced by the Ripper case?
0:10:08 > 0:10:11I was. You know, my favourite story and murder of all of them
0:10:11 > 0:10:14is a gentleman called - well, not gentlemen -
0:10:14 > 0:10:15called Thomas Neill Cream.
0:10:15 > 0:10:18- Called what?- Thomas Neill Cream. And he was a poisoner.
0:10:18 > 0:10:21- Neill Cream?- Doctor Thomas Neill Cream.- Sounds like leg ointment.
0:10:23 > 0:10:25There were a lot of Creamy murderers cos there's another one called
0:10:25 > 0:10:28The Chocolate Cream Poisoner, who used to poison chocolate creams in Brighton.
0:10:28 > 0:10:31This one... Watch out! But this one was called...
0:10:31 > 0:10:34- Watch out!- Dr Cream...
0:10:34 > 0:10:37There are people sitting at home now in Brighton going, "Wait a minute!"
0:10:37 > 0:10:39- Neill Cream.- Neill Cream...
0:10:39 > 0:10:42Those two guys on Gogglebox, who live in Brighton, watching!
0:10:49 > 0:10:51Neill Cream, he poisoned...
0:10:51 > 0:10:54He poisoned lots of women - working women, who were out on the streets -
0:10:54 > 0:10:56and it began to be a big story in 1892.
0:10:56 > 0:10:58Everyone was talking about it.
0:10:58 > 0:11:01And so he decided to capitalise on the great fame of the murders
0:11:01 > 0:11:04by running tours to the area that he'd committed the murders.
0:11:04 > 0:11:08- No?!- Sorry, Neill Cream ran his own tours to his own murder sites?- Yes.
0:11:08 > 0:11:10- Amazing! - He's the Jackie Chan of murderers!
0:11:12 > 0:11:15An off-duty New York policeman went on the tour
0:11:15 > 0:11:19and was curious about his enthusiasm and detailed grasp of the facts,
0:11:19 > 0:11:21and reported him to Scotland Yard,
0:11:21 > 0:11:23- and that's how they got him. - Amazing!
0:11:23 > 0:11:26That off-duty New York cop goes on holiday
0:11:26 > 0:11:29and then goes on a tour of crime scenes.
0:11:29 > 0:11:31Have a day off, mate!
0:11:31 > 0:11:35Debate still rages about the true identity of Jack the Ripper,
0:11:35 > 0:11:37with new theories emerging all the time.
0:11:37 > 0:11:39Let's have a look at a few of the candidates.
0:11:39 > 0:11:42One of the most famous suspects is artist Walter Sickert.
0:11:42 > 0:11:45There he is. This is a theory backed by American crime novelist
0:11:45 > 0:11:47Patricia Cornwell. Does anybody know how much money she spent
0:11:47 > 0:11:51- trying to prove that it was him?- I think it was a good million dollars.
0:11:51 > 0:11:54- I mean, it was a lot of money, wasn't it?- 7 million.
0:11:54 > 0:11:57- What?!- Wow.- He was in Paris for most of the murders anyway.
0:11:57 > 0:11:59He had a good alibi. They got desperate at the time.
0:11:59 > 0:12:02They even accused our friend Neill Cream of it...
0:12:02 > 0:12:03- Oh, not Cream!- Cream!
0:12:03 > 0:12:07How dare they?! I will not hear a word against him.
0:12:07 > 0:12:10He was in prison, so someone said he must have had a body double
0:12:10 > 0:12:11serve his sentence.
0:12:11 > 0:12:12Double Cream?
0:12:20 > 0:12:23What does Patricia believe turned Sickert into a murderer?
0:12:23 > 0:12:26He was a depressive and schizophrenic, wasn't he?
0:12:26 > 0:12:27He also had a fistula in his penis.
0:12:27 > 0:12:29- Oh!- Ugh!
0:12:29 > 0:12:31And it basically was a botched operation
0:12:31 > 0:12:33on the, er, penile fistula.
0:12:33 > 0:12:36And I resisted telling you about my unusual injury.
0:12:36 > 0:12:39Because I thought, actually, even, you know, at ten at night,
0:12:39 > 0:12:42- it was...- No, I need to hear it now. - Here we go!- Please!
0:12:42 > 0:12:43Bed in, Raphael's got news!
0:12:45 > 0:12:47I had a hernia operation a few years ago,
0:12:47 > 0:12:50and then I had...sex two hours afterwards...
0:12:50 > 0:12:53- Oh, legend!- Legend!
0:12:53 > 0:12:56Robbo! Robbo! Robbo!
0:12:58 > 0:13:00And...
0:13:00 > 0:13:03This is, at worst, a humble brag now!
0:13:03 > 0:13:05Well...
0:13:05 > 0:13:07So I then had the haemorrhage...
0:13:07 > 0:13:09- Oh!- ..of all haemorrhages.
0:13:09 > 0:13:12And, literally, everything sort of below here went blue.
0:13:12 > 0:13:15- Erm, but I went to the doctor and I said, er...- I bet you did!
0:13:15 > 0:13:17"I'm really sorry, I'm really embarrassed, I shouldn't
0:13:17 > 0:13:20"have done this." They said, "You'd be surprised how many people
0:13:20 > 0:13:22- "get into this predicament!" - Really?!
0:13:22 > 0:13:25Yes. Apparently, it's less unusual than you think.
0:13:25 > 0:13:27So is it the rush after the sort of anaesthetic's wearing off
0:13:27 > 0:13:29- that makes you...?- I don't know.
0:13:29 > 0:13:31No, there's this hernia nurse, right, and she...
0:13:33 > 0:13:35No, no, no, no!
0:13:35 > 0:13:39Other suspects include Victorian composer Michael Maybrick.
0:13:39 > 0:13:42There he is. And James Maybrick, Michael's brother.
0:13:42 > 0:13:43He's more handsome than his brother.
0:13:43 > 0:13:46That makes me think his brother did it more.
0:13:46 > 0:13:48Because he's so handsome and his brother felt inadequate.
0:13:48 > 0:13:51- Yeah.- But then is that exactly what he wanted you to think?
0:13:51 > 0:13:54I remember when I was young, I wanted...
0:13:54 > 0:13:57really wanted to write my name on the door ledge.
0:13:57 > 0:14:00I was like, "God, I really want to write my name on the door ledge!"
0:14:00 > 0:14:03And I was like, "No, because if I write my name on the door ledge,
0:14:03 > 0:14:06"then my mother will know that I did it. So I'll write
0:14:06 > 0:14:08"my sister Sinead's name on the door ledge,
0:14:08 > 0:14:10"and then she'll think that Sinead did it."
0:14:10 > 0:14:13But then I was like, "No, cos she'll know that's exactly
0:14:13 > 0:14:16"the sort of thing I'd do, so I'll write my own name on the door ledge
0:14:16 > 0:14:18"and it'll look like Sinead wrote my name on the door ledge."
0:14:18 > 0:14:22But I got caught out because Sinead couldn't write or read at the time.
0:14:24 > 0:14:26I got sloppy. I got sloppy.
0:14:26 > 0:14:28Yeah. But there were nearly as many suspects as there were
0:14:28 > 0:14:31people living in London, weren't there, Kate, at this time?
0:14:31 > 0:14:35Yes, there were. So they questioned 2,000 people...
0:14:35 > 0:14:36They questioned 2,000 people?!
0:14:36 > 0:14:39They did. Brought in 80, and charged no-one, but they had...
0:14:39 > 0:14:42- It's like X Factor! - Everyone, everyone.
0:14:42 > 0:14:46Also, one of the best suspects was an actor.
0:14:46 > 0:14:49He was called Richard Mansfield, and he was playing Jekyll and Hyde,
0:14:49 > 0:14:52and he played it so well that the audience decided he was guilty
0:14:52 > 0:14:54and was Jack the Ripper, and he was taken in by the police.
0:14:54 > 0:14:58- That is a good review!- Yeah. - GREAT review.
0:14:58 > 0:15:00It's time to play for the Jack.
0:15:00 > 0:15:03For this, we're going to look at a classic big-screen retelling
0:15:03 > 0:15:05of the story - the '80s classic
0:15:05 > 0:15:09Bridge Across Time, starring David Hasselhoff.
0:15:09 > 0:15:11- Ah!- Now, according to the movie,
0:15:11 > 0:15:14how does Jack the Ripper end up in Arizona in 1985?
0:15:14 > 0:15:17Oh, through London Bridge, I would guess.
0:15:17 > 0:15:20You've ju... Have you actually seen this movie?!
0:15:20 > 0:15:23No, they bought London... Or they bought what they thought
0:15:23 > 0:15:25was London Bridge, and it's now in Arizona.
0:15:25 > 0:15:27Is absolutely right!
0:15:27 > 0:15:29What?! Whoa!
0:15:29 > 0:15:31Yeah!
0:15:33 > 0:15:37The idea behind the film is that the evil spirit of Jack the Ripper
0:15:37 > 0:15:39seeped out of the original Victorian stone.
0:15:39 > 0:15:42Er, congratulations, Richard's team, you win the Jack.
0:15:42 > 0:15:44Yay!
0:15:46 > 0:15:50So, Richard, can I entice you to pick a Jack, please?
0:15:50 > 0:15:51You can, indeed.
0:15:51 > 0:15:53We will go for a...Saucy Jack.
0:15:53 > 0:15:55Erm, you've chosen Saucy Jack,
0:15:55 > 0:15:59and it's multi-million selling sexy novelist Jackie Collins.
0:15:59 > 0:16:01- Oh!- Let's have a look at her stats.
0:16:16 > 0:16:20So, Jackie was born on 4th October, 1937, in North-West London.
0:16:20 > 0:16:23Of course, the younger sister of actor Joan Collins.
0:16:23 > 0:16:25As a girl, she went to school in Baker Street,
0:16:25 > 0:16:27but got into trouble from an early age.
0:16:27 > 0:16:29What did she sell in the playground?
0:16:29 > 0:16:32- Was it heroin?- No.
0:16:32 > 0:16:33- Stationery?- No.
0:16:33 > 0:16:35- Naughty stories?- Pens? Oh, they're stationery.
0:16:35 > 0:16:37I'll give you naughty stories. Naughty limericks.
0:16:37 > 0:16:40She wrote them herself and sold them for a penny a time.
0:16:40 > 0:16:43Who's buying them? That's the kind of kid that you're just going
0:16:43 > 0:16:46to hate. "Guess what I've just brought. A naughty limerick from..."
0:16:46 > 0:16:48- "Oh, shut up, mate!" - I'd have bought it!
0:16:48 > 0:16:51Er, she got the idea of the limericks from her English teacher,
0:16:51 > 0:16:52Mr Presticles.
0:16:57 > 0:17:00Jackie's first novel - a sexy tale about a cheating husband,
0:17:00 > 0:17:04set in Swinging '60s London, called The World Is Full Of Married Men,
0:17:04 > 0:17:07was published in 1968 and promptly banned
0:17:07 > 0:17:09in Australia and South Africa.
0:17:09 > 0:17:12Here's the racy cover of the first UK edition.
0:17:12 > 0:17:14- Ooh!- The guy on the right, of course,
0:17:14 > 0:17:16later appeared on a packet of Pringles.
0:17:19 > 0:17:24How did fellow novelist Barbara Cartland describe this novel?
0:17:24 > 0:17:26I hate to throw a weird theory at you,
0:17:26 > 0:17:29but imagine Boris Johnson with some make-up on.
0:17:33 > 0:17:36That's him.
0:17:36 > 0:17:38How did Barbara describe this novel?
0:17:38 > 0:17:41- Filthy?- Filthy is absolutely one of the words she used, yep, well done.
0:17:41 > 0:17:44- Yeah.- Nasty, filthy and disgusting.
0:17:44 > 0:17:45- Nasty, filthy and disgusting.- Oh!
0:17:45 > 0:17:49She was the queen of romance, who wrote a total of 723 novels,
0:17:49 > 0:17:52and thought this new steamy genre was outrageous and unseemly.
0:17:52 > 0:17:54In fact, she carried on thinking that for years.
0:17:54 > 0:17:57Here she is with Jackie, on Wogan, in 1987.
0:17:57 > 0:18:00And apart from that, we've got to do something about the whole country,
0:18:00 > 0:18:04you know we have. And we've got to go away from all this awful,
0:18:04 > 0:18:06terrible... It's evil, really.
0:18:06 > 0:18:08What?
0:18:08 > 0:18:10The books that you write, quite frankly.
0:18:10 > 0:18:12Oh!
0:18:12 > 0:18:15GASPING, APPLAUSE
0:18:18 > 0:18:21- Look at Terry! - Wogan, though, just total panic.
0:18:21 > 0:18:24Just thinking, "Right, I'll quickly need to bring Bananarama on.
0:18:24 > 0:18:26"Let's get 'em on."
0:18:26 > 0:18:29Eight of Jackie's novels have been adapted for TV or film,
0:18:29 > 0:18:32and her big break was the movie adaptation of The Stud.
0:18:32 > 0:18:34It was her sister, Joan, who got the project off the ground
0:18:34 > 0:18:37and starred as Fontaine, the hedonistic nightclub owner.
0:18:37 > 0:18:39Here's Joan, with Oliver Tobias.
0:18:41 > 0:18:44- Ah! Oh, my goodness!- I can't work out whose legs are whose.
0:18:46 > 0:18:50Now it's time for you to win the big one - Jackie Collins.
0:18:50 > 0:18:52It's a question about her Hollywood series of books - Hollywood Wives,
0:18:52 > 0:18:55Hollywood Husbands, and Hollywood Wives: The New Generation.
0:18:55 > 0:18:58So, here are some characters from the books.
0:18:58 > 0:19:02We've got...
0:19:07 > 0:19:11Just two of these names are fake, so I want the team to find...
0:19:11 > 0:19:14- Well, they're all fake. - Two of them don't appear...
0:19:14 > 0:19:16Two of them don't appear in her books.
0:19:16 > 0:19:18So, I want each team to pick one that they think
0:19:18 > 0:19:22- is a bogus Jackie Collins character.- I read the...
0:19:22 > 0:19:25I read the recent... She wrote another one,
0:19:25 > 0:19:28which was Paul Hollywood's Wives, which I enjoyed very much.
0:19:29 > 0:19:31I think Bibi Sutton.
0:19:31 > 0:19:33I think Bibi Sutton, definitely, because I think everyone...
0:19:33 > 0:19:35I come from round there and everyone would go,
0:19:35 > 0:19:38"Oh, my God, can you believe it? She named a character after where
0:19:38 > 0:19:40- "we're from."- What, Sutton? - Yeah, Sutton.
0:19:40 > 0:19:43So you think that's right because you come from near Sutton?
0:19:44 > 0:19:46- You guys are going to go with... - We're going to go with Bibi Sutton
0:19:46 > 0:19:49because, otherwise, everyone in Sutton would have talked about it.
0:19:49 > 0:19:52Richard's team, er, can I get you to pick?
0:19:52 > 0:19:54I just think we'd all know Jack Python if he was real,
0:19:54 > 0:19:55if he was in the books.
0:19:55 > 0:19:57- Yeah.- So I think... I would go with Jack Python.
0:19:57 > 0:19:59- OK, well...- But are you sure?
0:19:59 > 0:20:01- No, no, no. Yeah. - So you're going to pick Jack Python.
0:20:01 > 0:20:04- Jack Python, please. - And you're picking Bibi Sutton.
0:20:04 > 0:20:06- Bibi Sutton.- And the two fake names are...
0:20:08 > 0:20:11Oh!
0:20:11 > 0:20:14Sadly, no-one is going to win the Jackie but, on the plus side,
0:20:14 > 0:20:17Jamie Oliver has got some new names for his next kid!
0:20:22 > 0:20:25Right, time now to fire up the Jack-flavoured fruit machine.
0:20:25 > 0:20:28Each time I spin, up will pop three of my favourite Jacks.
0:20:28 > 0:20:30Our team must match the extraordinary fact
0:20:30 > 0:20:33to the extraordinary Jack. Let's spin. We've got...
0:20:33 > 0:20:36Underworld villain, Jack the Hat McVitie...
0:20:36 > 0:20:39England footballing legend Jack Charlton...
0:20:39 > 0:20:43And Sylvester's mum, Jackie Stallone.
0:20:43 > 0:20:45- Ooh!- Now, the question is,
0:20:45 > 0:20:50which Jack completed their last year of school aged 40?
0:20:51 > 0:20:55This is interesting because Jack Charlton was one of Ireland's most
0:20:55 > 0:20:57successful football managers.
0:20:57 > 0:21:00I remember Jack getting an honorary degree,
0:21:00 > 0:21:01but he was way older.
0:21:01 > 0:21:04- He was way older. - And what about Jack the Hat McVitie?
0:21:04 > 0:21:07Was he in... Did he go to prison for a while?
0:21:07 > 0:21:09Would he have done his last year of school in prison?
0:21:09 > 0:21:11- Interesting.- Maybe. - Who is this first guy again?
0:21:11 > 0:21:14- He had a connection with the Krays. - Yeah, he was killed by the Krays.
0:21:14 > 0:21:15- That's a hell of a connection!- Oh.
0:21:15 > 0:21:17Do you know how old he was? That might help answer the question.
0:21:17 > 0:21:19It'd be terrible if he was 41 and it was
0:21:19 > 0:21:21a day after he'd finished school.
0:21:23 > 0:21:26- So much potential!- Guess what?! Guess what?!
0:21:26 > 0:21:28Ronnie Kray goes, "If I hear one more thing
0:21:28 > 0:21:30"about your French GCSE...!
0:21:31 > 0:21:34- Jackie, I think Jackie.- Jackie. We're going to go Jackie Stallone.
0:21:34 > 0:21:36You're going Jackie.
0:21:36 > 0:21:38Let's find out what Josh's team think.
0:21:38 > 0:21:42There's a kind of empty period in my knowledge of Jack Charlton,
0:21:42 > 0:21:44from 1966 to 1990.
0:21:44 > 0:21:47I don't know what he did. Maybe he just went back and got his
0:21:47 > 0:21:50- qualification.- Jack Charlton, to do your coaching badges,
0:21:50 > 0:21:51you'd probably need qualifications.
0:21:51 > 0:21:54- Exactly.- So I think he probably didn't finish school.
0:21:54 > 0:21:56All right, so you're going to go with Jack Charlton?
0:21:56 > 0:21:57- Jack Charlton.- Let's have a look.
0:21:57 > 0:22:00- It's Jackie Stallone. - Yes!- Yes.- Well done!
0:22:00 > 0:22:02Jackie. Having gone back to school aged 40,
0:22:02 > 0:22:05Jackie went on to graduate with a degree in chemistry.
0:22:05 > 0:22:07- Oh!- And she put that education to excellent use,
0:22:07 > 0:22:10cos she's now Dean of her very own
0:22:10 > 0:22:12University of Astrology.
0:22:12 > 0:22:15Their stringent entry requirement - extreme gullibility.
0:22:15 > 0:22:19Well done. You win, Richard's team, the Jack.
0:22:19 > 0:22:22APPLAUSE
0:22:22 > 0:22:24- Well done.- Right, let's have a look.
0:22:24 > 0:22:26We'll spin again, and we've got...
0:22:26 > 0:22:28Welsh Terrier, Swansea Jack...
0:22:28 > 0:22:32South African baboon, Jack the baboon.
0:22:32 > 0:22:35And pirates' best friend, Jack the parrot.
0:22:35 > 0:22:39Ah! We've really run out of Jacks, haven't we?
0:22:41 > 0:22:46So, the question is, which Jack used to operate railway signals?
0:22:46 > 0:22:49- Oh, come on!- Ooh.
0:22:49 > 0:22:52- Surely it's number one?- Let's consider how they would do it.
0:22:52 > 0:22:54Dog, how are you considering he would do it?
0:22:54 > 0:22:56Well, the dog seems the most obvious, doesn't it?
0:22:56 > 0:22:58- No!- Because in Slough, they've got the station dog,
0:22:58 > 0:23:01preserved and stuffed on one of the platforms.
0:23:01 > 0:23:03- Eurgh!- Yeah, of course, I'd forgotten about that!
0:23:03 > 0:23:06Oh, Josh!
0:23:06 > 0:23:10- Is it in England?- This happened in South Africa, in the 19th century.
0:23:10 > 0:23:12In the 19th century?
0:23:12 > 0:23:15- Right, well...- That's not a 19th-century parrot, I'm sorry.
0:23:16 > 0:23:20Neither is the middle one an original 19th-century baboon.
0:23:20 > 0:23:22This is the worst, the one on the left is a cat!
0:23:24 > 0:23:26I'd say the baboon, but...
0:23:26 > 0:23:29You'd say the baboon. I'm going to go with Kate because she was so sure
0:23:29 > 0:23:31about the stuffed dog in Slough.
0:23:31 > 0:23:33And Slough is very much the South Africa of England.
0:23:35 > 0:23:39All right, you've gone for... the Welsh Terrier, Swansea Jack.
0:23:39 > 0:23:41Oh, wait,
0:23:41 > 0:23:43he's called Swansea Jack?! Oh, disaster!
0:23:45 > 0:23:48Can I go with Johannesburg Jack, the baboon?
0:23:49 > 0:23:51Now, guys, what are you going to go with?
0:23:51 > 0:23:53We are going to go, I think, for, was he called
0:23:53 > 0:23:55Bloemfontein Jack, the one in the middle?
0:23:55 > 0:24:00No, I actually only gave the moniker South African baboon.
0:24:01 > 0:24:05Sometimes it pays to listen in this game, that's all I'm saying.
0:24:05 > 0:24:07- Baboon?- Baboon, please.
0:24:07 > 0:24:10- We're going to go for the baboon. - Well, this is tense, isn't it?
0:24:10 > 0:24:12It's the baboon!
0:24:19 > 0:24:23This was in South Africa, late 19th century, Jack was a pet baboon,
0:24:23 > 0:24:26trained by a signalman, who had been incapacitated.
0:24:26 > 0:24:28And, although sceptical, the railway authorities tested him,
0:24:28 > 0:24:31and were so impressed by his abilities
0:24:31 > 0:24:32that they hired him in 1881,
0:24:32 > 0:24:36paid him 20 cents a day, and even gave him an employee number.
0:24:36 > 0:24:38It all worked perfectly,
0:24:38 > 0:24:40although they never quite got to the bottom
0:24:40 > 0:24:43of the missing banana cargo of 1886.
0:24:45 > 0:24:47Richard, well done, you win Jack the baboon.
0:24:52 > 0:24:54Time to play Finish The Fact.
0:24:54 > 0:24:57I'm going to start by reading out a Jack-based gem,
0:24:57 > 0:25:00you're going to buzz in when you think you know how it ends.
0:25:00 > 0:25:02First up, we've got crazy war hero
0:25:02 > 0:25:05Lieutenant Colonel "Mad Jack" Churchill.
0:25:11 > 0:25:14Was it buy a round? I like the idea there was a last guy to buy a round.
0:25:14 > 0:25:17Everyone was like, "When is Jack going to buy a round?"
0:25:17 > 0:25:21- Never happened.- Did you know it was illegal in World War I
0:25:21 > 0:25:24- to buy a round?- What?!- It was against the law to buy a round...
0:25:24 > 0:25:27You've tried this on me in the pub before.
0:25:28 > 0:25:31Lloyd George said there were three threats facing us in Britain -
0:25:31 > 0:25:35the Germans, Austria and drink, and the worst of them is drink,
0:25:35 > 0:25:38and he thought that the only to win the war was by stopping everyone
0:25:38 > 0:25:40drinking, so he brought in the law that you had to buy your own drink.
0:25:40 > 0:25:44That is the best but most useless fact you've said on this show.
0:25:44 > 0:25:46I love that.
0:25:47 > 0:25:50I think I know this one, because we did this on Pointless.
0:25:50 > 0:25:52He became the last British soldier
0:25:52 > 0:25:55to have a UK top 40 single until James Blunt in 2005.
0:26:00 > 0:26:04He was actually the last British soldier to shoot a German officer...
0:26:11 > 0:26:13- ..was killed.- No.
0:26:16 > 0:26:18It'll be something like bagpipes, something like that.
0:26:18 > 0:26:20And it IS bagpipes! It is bagpipes.
0:26:20 > 0:26:22Beautiful.
0:26:28 > 0:26:31And he later stated if it wasn't for those damn Yanks...
0:26:35 > 0:26:37Well done, Richard's team.
0:26:37 > 0:26:39- That's a refreshing view, isn't it? - Well done. You win the Jack.
0:26:44 > 0:26:47Next, we got actor and comedian Jack Lemmon.
0:26:47 > 0:26:49Let's have a look at him in all his glory.
0:26:52 > 0:26:54Oh, it's Swansea, he was a keen South African.
0:26:57 > 0:27:00So, was he late to the hospital or something,
0:27:00 > 0:27:01was his mother late on the way?
0:27:01 > 0:27:04Yes, but where was he, so he didn't make it to the hospital...
0:27:04 > 0:27:05The driveway outside the hospital.
0:27:05 > 0:27:08- No.- In a car on the way to the hospital.
0:27:08 > 0:27:11- No.- Just before he got in the car on the way to hospital.
0:27:13 > 0:27:15On the stairs before he got to the...
0:27:15 > 0:27:17- Stairs is close.- Lift.
0:27:17 > 0:27:19Yes! A lift, yes.
0:27:26 > 0:27:28Fixing a lift.
0:27:29 > 0:27:31A crossword.
0:27:31 > 0:27:33- Close.- Cards.
0:27:33 > 0:27:36It was a game... It was a card game, yes.
0:27:36 > 0:27:38His parents were very serious bridge players,
0:27:38 > 0:27:40and on the eighth of February 1925,
0:27:40 > 0:27:44they were playing together in a highly competitive match in Boston.
0:27:44 > 0:27:47Eventually, Jack's father persuaded her to go to hospital,
0:27:47 > 0:27:49but on the way to the delivery room they got stuck in a lift.
0:27:49 > 0:27:53She knew it was time to go when her waters broke, or as she called it,
0:27:53 > 0:27:54a straight flush.
0:27:54 > 0:27:58Very well done, Josh's team, you win the Jack.
0:27:58 > 0:27:59Lovely Jack Lemmon.
0:28:01 > 0:28:03So, we come to the end of the show,
0:28:03 > 0:28:06and I can tell you that tonight's winners with the most Jacks,
0:28:06 > 0:28:08Richard's team!
0:28:08 > 0:28:10APPLAUSE AND CHEERING
0:28:10 > 0:28:13- Well done. - Fair play.
0:28:13 > 0:28:15Big moment now, Richard,
0:28:15 > 0:28:17who are you going to name as your greatest Jack of all time?
0:28:17 > 0:28:20I think that, of all the Jacks we've seen,
0:28:20 > 0:28:22I think someone who came from an extraordinary family,
0:28:22 > 0:28:25made an extraordinary amount of money with her own talent,
0:28:25 > 0:28:27and was hated by Barbara Cartland,
0:28:27 > 0:28:29I think we'll go for Jackie Collins?
0:28:29 > 0:28:30- Yes.- Jackie Collins, please, Sue.
0:28:30 > 0:28:33Jackie Collins, a worthy choice.
0:28:33 > 0:28:38Jackie Collins goes on the Insert Name Here Hall Of Fame.
0:28:38 > 0:28:40Up she goes. And my thanks to all of our guests,
0:28:40 > 0:28:43special thanks to all the Jacks here, there and everywhere,
0:28:43 > 0:28:47and thanks to you, most of all, at home for watching. Good night.
0:28:47 > 0:28:50APPLAUSE AND CHEERING, WHISTLING