Diddle Diddle Dumpling

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0:00:02 > 0:00:05This programme contains some strong language

0:00:09 > 0:00:12MUSIC: Spring from The Four Seasons by Antonio Vivaldi

0:00:30 > 0:00:31Oh.

0:01:37 > 0:01:39You haven't thrown away those jam jars, have you?

0:01:39 > 0:01:41I was collecting them for the spring fair.

0:01:41 > 0:01:43No, they're under the sink.

0:01:43 > 0:01:44Oh.

0:01:44 > 0:01:47You've gotta fill them with stuff for raffle prizes.

0:01:47 > 0:01:49What's wrong with the jam? That's a good prize.

0:01:49 > 0:01:51Well, try telling that to the PSA.

0:01:51 > 0:01:54There's a list of approved items. It's on the fridge.

0:01:54 > 0:01:57- What like? iPhones? - Yeah, probably.

0:01:57 > 0:02:01Oh, and remember, Sally's got a play-date with Gertrude.

0:02:01 > 0:02:04Gertrude? Isn't that the cow from the Magic Roundabout?

0:02:04 > 0:02:06No, that is Ermintrude.

0:02:06 > 0:02:07Ridiculous.

0:02:07 > 0:02:09Well, you did say you wanted her to have more friends.

0:02:09 > 0:02:12Yeah, but I'd rather they weren't Shakespeare characters,

0:02:12 > 0:02:13Greek goddesses or French wines.

0:02:13 > 0:02:16Fine. I'll tell Sauvignon's mother we're cancelling, shall I?

0:02:16 > 0:02:17You are joking?

0:02:17 > 0:02:20- Maybe.- Huh.

0:02:20 > 0:02:21How was your run?

0:02:21 > 0:02:23Mmm. Yeah, it was fine. It was weird though.

0:02:23 > 0:02:25Weird? Why?

0:02:25 > 0:02:29Well, coming in just now, there was a shoe on the pavement.

0:02:29 > 0:02:33- A shoe?- Yeah, just one single black shoe. Looks like it's been placed.

0:02:33 > 0:02:35It's not old, it's like a brand-new shoe.

0:02:35 > 0:02:38Right. Erm, you haven't seen my keys, have you?

0:02:38 > 0:02:41I put it up on the wall anyway, see if anyone comes back for it.

0:02:41 > 0:02:44So odd. What's the story behind it?

0:02:44 > 0:02:46Right, I am off.

0:02:46 > 0:02:48Make sure she brushes her teeth, won't you?

0:02:48 > 0:02:50And if you get a chance,

0:02:50 > 0:02:52will you sneak a peek in Gertrude's book bag?

0:02:52 > 0:02:55- Why?- Just to see what she's reading.

0:02:55 > 0:02:56Seriously?

0:02:56 > 0:02:58- I don't want Sally falling behind. - She's seven.

0:02:58 > 0:03:00She should be reading Janet And Whatsit Have Two Mummies,

0:03:00 > 0:03:01or whatever they read these days.

0:03:01 > 0:03:03Right, see you later!

0:03:03 > 0:03:04Yeah, OK.

0:03:04 > 0:03:07See if that shoe's still there when you go by.

0:03:07 > 0:03:08Bye, Sally!

0:03:08 > 0:03:09Bye, Mummy!

0:03:12 > 0:03:15MUSIC: Spring from The Four Seasons by Antonio Vivaldi

0:03:47 > 0:03:49Oh, I'm so sorry I'm late.

0:03:49 > 0:03:52I had a conference call with Bombay and it took ages

0:03:52 > 0:03:53to get everybody on the line.

0:03:53 > 0:03:56Better than watching 50 episodes of Fifi And The Flowertots.

0:03:56 > 0:03:57Ah, is she still awake?

0:03:57 > 0:03:59No, she tried but she fell asleep

0:03:59 > 0:04:03- with the book in her hand, bless her.- Oh, I feel awful now.

0:04:06 > 0:04:08What's this?

0:04:08 > 0:04:10- Oh, it's that shoe I was telling you about.- What shoe?

0:04:10 > 0:04:14That shoe from this morning, I told you it was outside the house.

0:04:14 > 0:04:16Well, what's it doing on the table?

0:04:16 > 0:04:17I thought I'd bring it in.

0:04:17 > 0:04:19And put it there? Well, you don't know where its been.

0:04:19 > 0:04:21It could be covered in dog shit.

0:04:21 > 0:04:22It's brand-new, that's the whole point.

0:04:22 > 0:04:26Well, if it's brand-new, don't put it on the table, it's bad luck.

0:04:29 > 0:04:32All right, I just didn't want anyone stealing it.

0:04:32 > 0:04:33What, so you stole it?

0:04:33 > 0:04:35It just felt wrong leaving it outside, that's all.

0:04:35 > 0:04:39Give it to the school for the spring fair if you're that bothered. You can put Tiffany earrings in it.

0:04:42 > 0:04:44This was nicer two hours ago.

0:04:44 > 0:04:45I'm sorry.

0:04:49 > 0:04:51I, erm,

0:04:51 > 0:04:53I spoke to Chris Hutchinson today.

0:04:54 > 0:04:55Oh, yeah?

0:04:55 > 0:04:59Mm. They're taking over that empty shop next door to Planet Organic.

0:04:59 > 0:05:01He's looking for some new reps.

0:05:02 > 0:05:04Oh, right.

0:05:05 > 0:05:09Well, it's not a million miles away from what you were doing at Fraser's, is it?

0:05:11 > 0:05:14Yeah, sounds good. I'll, erm, I'll drop him a line.

0:05:14 > 0:05:18Oh, I managed to sneak a look in Gertrude's book bag by the way.

0:05:18 > 0:05:19Oh, yeah, what's she reading?

0:05:19 > 0:05:21Anna Karenina.

0:05:21 > 0:05:22And it was in Russian.

0:05:22 > 0:05:24SHE SPLUTTERS

0:05:24 > 0:05:27You know what, I wouldn't be surprised.

0:05:27 > 0:05:28I spoke to her mother the other day.

0:05:28 > 0:05:31You know that mean-faced one with the bad breath?

0:05:31 > 0:05:33Jeez, she went on and on and on

0:05:33 > 0:05:35about where they were going on holiday.

0:05:35 > 0:05:38And I know she wanted me to get to admit that we were going to

0:05:38 > 0:05:42Center Parcs again and I was not going to rise to it.

0:05:42 > 0:05:46She went on and on and on about bloody...

0:05:46 > 0:05:49MUSIC: Spring from The Four Seasons by Antonio Vivaldi

0:06:03 > 0:06:04Vroom, vroom.

0:06:07 > 0:06:11What are you doing? You mustn't do that! Give it here.

0:06:11 > 0:06:12I was giving Suzie a ride.

0:06:12 > 0:06:14This is not your property, Sally!

0:06:14 > 0:06:16- Whose is it then? - Well, we don't know, do we?

0:06:16 > 0:06:18That's what Daddy's trying to find out.

0:06:18 > 0:06:20Go to your room. You can play in there.

0:06:23 > 0:06:25David?

0:06:25 > 0:06:26What's this?

0:06:26 > 0:06:29We've got to talk to Sally about respecting other people's things.

0:06:29 > 0:06:31I found these stuck on the lampposts down the street.

0:06:31 > 0:06:33I did 20 of them but the printer ran out of ink.

0:06:33 > 0:06:34"Found - one black man's shoe."

0:06:34 > 0:06:36I know, I wasn't sure about that either.

0:06:36 > 0:06:40Cos it could sound like we're saying the shoe belongs to a black man. It might do, we don't know,

0:06:40 > 0:06:41but do you think we should change it?

0:06:41 > 0:06:43You've put our number on it.

0:06:43 > 0:06:47- Well, how else are they going to get in contact?- Well, I don't want them to get in contact!

0:06:47 > 0:06:49I just don't like the idea of our number being displayed

0:06:49 > 0:06:51up and down the street.

0:06:51 > 0:06:54- So what?- Well, people can call us, find out if we're in or out.

0:06:54 > 0:06:56I mean, burglars.

0:06:56 > 0:06:57You're making too much out of this.

0:06:57 > 0:06:59You haven't even put a picture on it, David.

0:06:59 > 0:07:01It's just a stupid drawing.

0:07:01 > 0:07:04Well, I'm not going to give away all the details, am I? Or else anyone could claim it.

0:07:04 > 0:07:07They'll have to describe it to me when they get in touch.

0:07:07 > 0:07:11It is a single tramp's shoe that you f...

0:07:11 > 0:07:13That you found in the street. Now just give it to Oxfam.

0:07:13 > 0:07:17They won't have it. They wouldn't take those Angelina Ballerina videos. Nothing wrong with them!

0:07:17 > 0:07:20Because they're videos! People don't have video players any more!

0:07:20 > 0:07:22The library does!

0:07:29 > 0:07:31Is...?

0:07:36 > 0:07:38PHONE RINGS

0:07:39 > 0:07:41I'll get it. No, you get it.

0:07:42 > 0:07:45Ask them exactly whereabouts they lost it.

0:07:45 > 0:07:47And don't mention the size!

0:07:51 > 0:07:52Hello.

0:07:53 > 0:07:54Hello, Mum.

0:07:55 > 0:07:59Oh, yeah, did you? Who'd you go with?

0:07:59 > 0:08:00No, she's fine.

0:08:00 > 0:08:03Hurry up, people might be trying to get through.

0:08:03 > 0:08:04No, sorry.

0:08:04 > 0:08:08MUSIC: Summer from The Four Seasons by Antonio Vivaldi

0:08:31 > 0:08:34Daddy, come and see what Sally's got.

0:08:39 > 0:08:43Oh, wow, this looks good.

0:08:43 > 0:08:45Is it the one you wanted?

0:08:45 > 0:08:46What's his name?

0:08:59 > 0:09:01You take on a refurb like that, you're always going to be

0:09:01 > 0:09:04looking at some time overspend, so, yeah, we've not done too badly.

0:09:04 > 0:09:07And the footfall from Planet Organic's going to be really good

0:09:07 > 0:09:09for us - all those yummy mummies and their yoga mats.

0:09:09 > 0:09:10Oh, don't.

0:09:10 > 0:09:12I should go, I just don't have the time.

0:09:12 > 0:09:14No, you don't need to do that, you look smashing.

0:09:14 > 0:09:16There we go.

0:09:16 > 0:09:18Oh, you've already got drinks?

0:09:18 > 0:09:20Yeah, you just poured them out!

0:09:20 > 0:09:22Dunno what I'm doing. Trying to get you pissed!

0:09:22 > 0:09:24Hey, I'm not complaining.

0:09:24 > 0:09:27Anyway, come on. Sit down.

0:09:27 > 0:09:28What do you reckon?

0:09:28 > 0:09:31- About what?- Well, Lou said you might be ready to jump back

0:09:31 > 0:09:34on the gravy train, bit of part-time work.

0:09:34 > 0:09:37Oh, yeah, no. Sounds good, erm, but I am a bit busy at the moment.

0:09:37 > 0:09:40Ah! Other irons in the fire, eh?

0:09:40 > 0:09:42Well, it's just I've got a bit of a project on the go.

0:09:42 > 0:09:44No, you haven't.

0:09:44 > 0:09:46Yes, I have, the shoe.

0:09:46 > 0:09:47David.

0:09:47 > 0:09:48What?

0:09:48 > 0:09:49Not now.

0:09:49 > 0:09:50What's this?

0:09:50 > 0:09:52Well, about three weeks ago...

0:09:52 > 0:09:53More like three months ago.

0:09:53 > 0:09:56All right, well, whenever it was.

0:09:56 > 0:09:58A few weeks ago I found a shoe outside the house.

0:09:58 > 0:10:01It wasn't like a thrown away discarded one.

0:10:01 > 0:10:04This was black, slip-on, good quality leather.

0:10:04 > 0:10:06Hardly a mark on it.

0:10:06 > 0:10:08And you're trying to find a retail outlet for them?

0:10:08 > 0:10:10You see them as a new range?

0:10:10 > 0:10:13No, no. I just found a shoe.

0:10:13 > 0:10:15Someone lost a single shoe.

0:10:15 > 0:10:17Well, no, we don't know. That's the whole point.

0:10:17 > 0:10:19We don't know what happened, do we?

0:10:19 > 0:10:22Could be an accident, someone's fallen over, the shoe's come off.

0:10:22 > 0:10:24Could be an older gentlemen with Alzheimer's, say.

0:10:24 > 0:10:26He's gone for a wander, doesn't know where he left it.

0:10:26 > 0:10:29Could be kids dressing up - they've taken their dad's shoe out of the house.

0:10:29 > 0:10:31Maybe penny for the Guy.

0:10:31 > 0:10:32What, in March?

0:10:37 > 0:10:39Right, so it's a bit of a mystery.

0:10:39 > 0:10:40Exactly.

0:10:41 > 0:10:42Do you want to see it?

0:10:44 > 0:10:47- Yeah, if you like. - Yeah, OK.- David, don't.

0:10:47 > 0:10:50What? I'm just showing Chris - he's intrigued.

0:10:57 > 0:10:58Have you moved it, Louise?

0:10:58 > 0:11:00It was under here. Where is it?

0:11:02 > 0:11:04It's gone, David.

0:11:04 > 0:11:07No, I know its gone. I can see it's gone. Where is it?

0:11:07 > 0:11:08I threw it away.

0:11:11 > 0:11:12You fucking what?

0:11:14 > 0:11:16I got rid of it. I threw it in the bin!

0:11:16 > 0:11:19It was too much, you were getting obsessed by it.

0:11:19 > 0:11:22- I'm not obsessed! - Of course you are!

0:11:22 > 0:11:24He's created a website.

0:11:24 > 0:11:26He's been badgering the police for CCTV footage.

0:11:26 > 0:11:28It's public spirited! You know Mike Evans, don't you?

0:11:28 > 0:11:30It's insane!

0:11:30 > 0:11:32You can't go for more than two minutes without banging on

0:11:32 > 0:11:34about a bloody shoe you found!

0:11:34 > 0:11:35- Course I can!- You can't!

0:11:35 > 0:11:38All right, then, time me!

0:11:38 > 0:11:40Come on, Chris, time me - two minutes.

0:11:40 > 0:11:41- There's no need... - No, she thinks I'm insane.

0:11:41 > 0:11:44No, I didn't say you're insane, I said it's insane!

0:11:44 > 0:11:46We'll see who's making an absolute mountain out of a molehill!

0:11:50 > 0:11:52Do it.

0:11:52 > 0:11:54Do it. I want you to see this.

0:11:58 > 0:12:01OK, erm, two minutes.

0:12:26 > 0:12:28You going away this summer, Chris, or...?

0:12:28 > 0:12:31I might go and see my mum in Hastings.

0:12:31 > 0:12:33I've got to be around for the shop really, so...

0:12:33 > 0:12:34How long?

0:12:34 > 0:12:37- Just three or four days. - No, I mean, how long?

0:12:37 > 0:12:39Oh, erm, 30 seconds.

0:12:49 > 0:12:51This is very cruel what you're doing, you know.

0:12:51 > 0:12:52I don't mean it to be.

0:12:54 > 0:12:55I just want to help you, David.

0:13:00 > 0:13:01Which bin is it in?

0:13:01 > 0:13:03Well, that was barely a minute.

0:13:03 > 0:13:04- Which bin?!- The green one!

0:13:16 > 0:13:18I'm so sorry about this, Chris.

0:13:18 > 0:13:21It's OK, Lou, no problem.

0:13:21 > 0:13:23You know he's...

0:13:23 > 0:13:24He's not been well.

0:13:24 > 0:13:26It's fine. I understand.

0:13:28 > 0:13:30But you've been through a lot too, you know.

0:13:34 > 0:13:35I can't.

0:13:37 > 0:13:40Here you go, Chris! Sorry about that.

0:13:40 > 0:13:42Panic over.

0:13:42 > 0:13:45Now then, if you saw that in the street,

0:13:45 > 0:13:48you wouldn't think it'd been thrown, would you? You'd think it'd been lost.

0:13:48 > 0:13:50I see what you mean.

0:13:50 > 0:13:51Careful.

0:13:54 > 0:13:59So, erm, you're just trying to find the rightful owner. Like Cinderella.

0:13:59 > 0:14:01Exactly! We need to do a proclamation throughout the land.

0:14:01 > 0:14:04Get the media involved. Have celebrities talking about it.

0:14:04 > 0:14:07We need it trending on Twitter, hashtag - "the lost shoe".

0:14:12 > 0:14:14You know what I mean though, don't you, Chris?

0:14:14 > 0:14:16I'm not going mad.

0:14:16 > 0:14:17A pair of shoes, they...

0:14:19 > 0:14:20They deserve to be together.

0:14:21 > 0:14:23Have to be.

0:14:24 > 0:14:25How they belong.

0:14:26 > 0:14:27I understand.

0:14:29 > 0:14:32Let me have a word with Laurence who does my PR.

0:14:32 > 0:14:33We'll see what we can do.

0:14:33 > 0:14:36Oh, thank you. Finally, somebody gets it!

0:14:36 > 0:14:39MUSIC: Summer from The Four Seasons by Antonio Vivaldi

0:14:44 > 0:14:47RADIO: But look, you've offered a reward, is that right?

0:14:47 > 0:14:50Yes. Yeah, I thought it would be some incentive there for people

0:14:50 > 0:14:52to come forward, you know, with any information.

0:14:52 > 0:14:55Well, listen if you've got any old shoes, listen to David.

0:14:55 > 0:14:57If you've got any old shoes lying around your garden,

0:14:57 > 0:15:00bring them to his place, he'll turn them into hard cash!

0:15:00 > 0:15:01Well, no, no.

0:15:01 > 0:15:04The reward would be specifically for the pairing of the shoe in question.

0:15:04 > 0:15:06I don't want time wasters.

0:15:06 > 0:15:09I could have done with you this morning, David - I was sorting out my sock drawer.

0:15:09 > 0:15:12Anyway, look, we've had an e-mail from Jacqueline in Barnet and she

0:15:12 > 0:15:14says, "Why don't you just give the money to a homeless shelter?

0:15:14 > 0:15:18"Why are you concentrating on this one shoe?"

0:15:18 > 0:15:21Jacqueline, someone somewhere is missing a shoe and if I can bring

0:15:21 > 0:15:27that person and that shoe together, then I will have achieved that.

0:15:27 > 0:15:29All, right, David. Let's say this for a second, yeah.

0:15:29 > 0:15:31Say I'm the person that lost that shoe.

0:15:31 > 0:15:34Now I go back to look for it, but it's not there because you,

0:15:34 > 0:15:35you've got it in your house.

0:15:35 > 0:15:37Now what do I do?

0:15:38 > 0:15:41Well, as I say, it's all, it's all on the website and...

0:15:43 > 0:15:45Stupid question.

0:15:45 > 0:15:46Daddy!

0:15:47 > 0:15:50MUSIC: Summer from The Four Seasons by Antonio Vivaldi

0:15:57 > 0:16:00- ANSWERPHONE:- You have no new messages.

0:16:14 > 0:16:16DOORBELL RINGS

0:16:24 > 0:16:26Hi, I've come about the shoe.

0:16:26 > 0:16:27Sorry?

0:16:27 > 0:16:30The missing shoe. I think it's mine.

0:16:30 > 0:16:33Oh, right, well, you'd better come in.

0:16:36 > 0:16:37Come through.

0:16:37 > 0:16:38Thanks.

0:16:40 > 0:16:42Erm, do you want to take a seat?

0:16:42 > 0:16:45No, you're all right, thanks.

0:16:45 > 0:16:48Yeah, so can I ask how you heard about us?

0:16:48 > 0:16:51My wife heard you on the radio, whenever that was.

0:16:51 > 0:16:53Oh, right. You live locally?

0:16:53 > 0:16:55No, we live up in Norfolk.

0:16:55 > 0:16:57We were down here for a wedding.

0:16:57 > 0:17:00The shoe must have fallen out the bottom of my suit bag.

0:17:00 > 0:17:03We were parked just out there by the tree.

0:17:03 > 0:17:05Right.

0:17:06 > 0:17:07Whose wedding was it?

0:17:08 > 0:17:11I don't think you'd know them. What's that got to do with anything?

0:17:11 > 0:17:14Oh nothing, I'm just trying to get a full picture.

0:17:14 > 0:17:17Erm, OK, well, I'm going to ask you a couple of questions.

0:17:17 > 0:17:20- I'm sure, erm, I'm sure you understand.- OK.

0:17:22 > 0:17:25What size was the shoe you claim you lost?

0:17:27 > 0:17:29Nine.

0:17:30 > 0:17:32Correct.

0:17:32 > 0:17:33Good start.

0:17:33 > 0:17:36Next, I'm going to show you some photographs and I want you

0:17:36 > 0:17:40to tell me which one is the correct tread - A, B, C or D.

0:17:57 > 0:17:58Can I see B again?

0:18:00 > 0:18:02Yeah.

0:18:02 > 0:18:04There you go.

0:18:04 > 0:18:05Take your time.

0:18:07 > 0:18:08OK, I think it's C.

0:18:16 > 0:18:17C.

0:18:18 > 0:18:21And what colour are the laces?

0:18:22 > 0:18:24It didn't have laces, it was a slip-on.

0:18:25 > 0:18:28Actually, I've got the other one here if you need proof?

0:18:34 > 0:18:35Just let me...

0:18:37 > 0:18:39Yeah, it looks the same.

0:18:40 > 0:18:42Correct tread.

0:18:42 > 0:18:45And, what, it just fell out of your suit carrier, you say?

0:18:45 > 0:18:48Mm. It can't have been zipped up properly.

0:18:48 > 0:18:49Mm, sounds plausible.

0:18:51 > 0:18:53Looks like we've got a match.

0:18:54 > 0:18:56Well done.

0:19:02 > 0:19:04Well, can I have it then?

0:19:04 > 0:19:06What, you want to take it now?

0:19:06 > 0:19:09That's what I'm here for.

0:19:09 > 0:19:11Right, yeah.

0:19:12 > 0:19:14Do you want a drink or anything? Celebrate?

0:19:14 > 0:19:17No, I'd best get off. My car's on a meter.

0:19:21 > 0:19:22OK.

0:19:42 > 0:19:44Here he is.

0:19:44 > 0:19:46I've looked after him.

0:19:48 > 0:19:50I, erm, I won't make you try them on.

0:19:50 > 0:19:51That'd be weird, wouldn't it?

0:19:51 > 0:19:53- Yes.- Yeah.

0:19:59 > 0:20:02Could you just give me a minute, please? I'm finding this really hard.

0:20:04 > 0:20:06Sure.

0:20:06 > 0:20:07Can I use your loo?

0:20:07 > 0:20:10Yes. It's just... It's by the front door.

0:20:30 > 0:20:32TOILET FLUSHES

0:20:35 > 0:20:36All right?

0:20:36 > 0:20:38Yeah.

0:20:38 > 0:20:39Yeah, here you go.

0:20:41 > 0:20:43They're both in there,

0:20:43 > 0:20:44so that's that done now.

0:20:46 > 0:20:48Mission accomplished.

0:20:48 > 0:20:50Well, thank you.

0:20:56 > 0:21:00Oh, I need to get you some money for the reward.

0:21:00 > 0:21:02No, I'm not bothered about that.

0:21:02 > 0:21:04I just wanted the shoe.

0:21:04 > 0:21:05Thanks again.

0:21:05 > 0:21:07No, thank you.

0:21:07 > 0:21:08And you know where we are now so...

0:21:09 > 0:21:13MUSIC: Autumn from The Four Seasons by Antonio Vivaldi

0:21:16 > 0:21:21That's right, and autumn has a silent "n" at the end

0:21:21 > 0:21:25like column or hymn.

0:21:25 > 0:21:26Who?

0:21:27 > 0:21:30No, like a hymn that you sing in church.

0:21:31 > 0:21:32Like a funeral?

0:21:34 > 0:21:36Yeah.

0:21:36 > 0:21:40Yeah, or a wedding or the harvest festival.

0:21:40 > 0:21:41Where are my girls?

0:21:41 > 0:21:43Daddy!

0:21:43 > 0:21:46Hello.

0:21:46 > 0:21:48Oh, wow!

0:21:48 > 0:21:50Have you done an autumn picture?

0:21:50 > 0:21:56Yeah, look, there's falling leaves, a bonfire and there's Mummy, look.

0:21:56 > 0:21:57It's a pumpkin.

0:21:57 > 0:22:00Cheeky! Go and put it in your book bag, darling,

0:22:00 > 0:22:01you can take it in tomorrow.

0:22:04 > 0:22:05How was today?

0:22:05 > 0:22:08Fine, yeah, we got those, erm, tiles in from Italy and Chris says

0:22:08 > 0:22:11there might be a trip out there in a couple of months.

0:22:11 > 0:22:12- Very nice.- Mm.

0:22:12 > 0:22:14Wives invited?

0:22:14 > 0:22:16Well, we'll have to see, won't we?

0:22:17 > 0:22:21Daddy, can I show you my assembly? I've got lines.

0:22:21 > 0:22:22Oh, yes, go on!

0:22:22 > 0:22:24We're doing nursery rhymes.

0:22:24 > 0:22:25Darling, let Daddy get in.

0:22:25 > 0:22:27I'm going to make him a cup of tea first.

0:22:27 > 0:22:30No, I don't mind. Go on, Sal. I'll be the audience.

0:22:30 > 0:22:32Well, I'm here and Annabel's here,

0:22:32 > 0:22:35and Christian's here and he says, "Diddle diddle dumpling,

0:22:35 > 0:22:40"my son, John," and Annabel says, "Went to bed with his trousers on."

0:22:40 > 0:22:43And I say, "One shoe off and one shoe on," then we all say,

0:22:43 > 0:22:45"Diddle diddle dumpling, my son, John."

0:22:49 > 0:22:53Encore! More. Well done.

0:22:55 > 0:22:58MUSIC: Winter from The Four Seasons by Antonio Vivaldi

0:23:39 > 0:23:41David?

0:23:41 > 0:23:43What have you been doing?

0:23:43 > 0:23:46Mm, well, I could ask you that, Louise, couldn't I?

0:23:46 > 0:23:48What do you mean? What's this doing outside?

0:23:48 > 0:23:51What do you think? It's back where it belongs.

0:23:53 > 0:23:54What are you talking about?

0:23:54 > 0:23:57You said the owner came and took it weeks ago.

0:23:57 > 0:23:59You said it was all sorted.

0:23:59 > 0:24:00Who's that?

0:24:01 > 0:24:05Erm, I don't know. People from college?

0:24:05 > 0:24:06Your college?

0:24:06 > 0:24:08Yeah. What is this?

0:24:08 > 0:24:11I was doing you a photobook for your birthday.

0:24:11 > 0:24:14Thought it'd be a nice surprise and I got all your old pictures

0:24:14 > 0:24:16out and I found...him.

0:24:16 > 0:24:19Your friend. What's his name?

0:24:23 > 0:24:24Ted.

0:24:24 > 0:24:25Oh, it's Ted, is it?

0:24:27 > 0:24:29When did you last see Ted?

0:24:32 > 0:24:33Dunno, it was a while ago.

0:24:33 > 0:24:36Really? Cos I saw Ted six weeks ago when he came round,

0:24:36 > 0:24:37pretended he owned the shoe.

0:24:40 > 0:24:43- I don't know what you're talking about.- Well, this'll really confuse you then.

0:24:43 > 0:24:45Cos after I found that picture, I got your VAT file out,

0:24:45 > 0:24:47went through your receipts and I found this.

0:24:47 > 0:24:49From Stead and Simpson - black slip-on, size 9.

0:24:49 > 0:24:52- Oh, David.- Dated two days before Ted came to see me.

0:24:52 > 0:24:54How do you explain that?

0:25:00 > 0:25:01OK.

0:25:05 > 0:25:06He was doing me a favour.

0:25:08 > 0:25:09I was trying to help you.

0:25:09 > 0:25:11By lying to me? By giving me false hope?

0:25:11 > 0:25:13Oh, listen to yourself, David!

0:25:16 > 0:25:18I just wanted it to be over.

0:25:18 > 0:25:23Who cares? Who cares who took the fucking stupid shoe?!

0:25:29 > 0:25:31It's not about the shoe, is it?

0:25:35 > 0:25:37It was never about the shoe.

0:25:38 > 0:25:40No.

0:25:41 > 0:25:43No, it isn't.

0:25:45 > 0:25:48And it's not healthy, David.

0:25:48 > 0:25:49For any of us.

0:25:53 > 0:25:55It's been six years.

0:25:55 > 0:25:57Oh, I'm sorry, is that the time limit?

0:25:57 > 0:25:59Should I be over it now?

0:25:59 > 0:26:03No. No, that's not what I'm saying, but we still have Sally.

0:26:03 > 0:26:06We... We have to live our lives, for her sake.

0:26:06 > 0:26:09She doesn't even remember having a brother.

0:26:09 > 0:26:11Not a brother.

0:26:13 > 0:26:14A twin.

0:26:16 > 0:26:18Two halves, Louise...

0:26:22 > 0:26:25..and one of them's gone.

0:26:25 > 0:26:26Yeah, I know.

0:26:28 > 0:26:33And I understand now what you're trying to do,

0:26:33 > 0:26:35but we can't do that, David...

0:26:40 > 0:26:42..because Joseph is dead.

0:26:44 > 0:26:46He died.

0:26:49 > 0:26:51They should be together.

0:26:59 > 0:27:00David, you're bleeding.

0:27:03 > 0:27:04No, I'm not.

0:27:13 > 0:27:15Where did you get that shoe?

0:27:18 > 0:27:19I went to see Ted.

0:27:21 > 0:27:22In Norfolk?

0:27:22 > 0:27:24Yes, in Norfolk.

0:27:25 > 0:27:27He didn't want to give me it.

0:27:27 > 0:27:29SIRENS APPROACH

0:27:29 > 0:27:32He said something about me being unreasonable.

0:27:40 > 0:27:41What did you do?

0:27:44 > 0:27:47David, what did you do?

0:27:54 > 0:27:55I can't remember.

0:27:56 > 0:27:58CAR DOORS CLOSE

0:28:01 > 0:28:04MUSIC: Winter from The Four Seasons by Antonio Vivaldi