0:00:06 > 0:00:08Elis James, comedian.
0:00:08 > 0:00:10Born in Wales, lives in England.
0:00:10 > 0:00:12Miles Jupp, comedian.
0:00:12 > 0:00:14Born in England, lives in Wales.
0:00:15 > 0:00:19These are our journeys across Wales by land, sea and rail.
0:00:19 > 0:00:20TRAIN WHISTLE BLASTS
0:00:22 > 0:00:23- So you've moved to Wales. - That is right.
0:00:23 > 0:00:25You've been on holidays here.
0:00:25 > 0:00:27I've spent a lot of time here. But I'm hungry.
0:00:27 > 0:00:29I want to know more. I want to see more. I want to feel more.
0:00:29 > 0:00:31Well, guess who your ideal guide is.
0:00:31 > 0:00:33Well, my ideal guide would be Rhod Gilbert.
0:00:33 > 0:00:34Yes, he's unavailable.
0:00:34 > 0:00:35Guess who's available.
0:00:37 > 0:00:39Stop! We've made a terrible mistake! CHUCKLING
0:00:39 > 0:00:41Argh!
0:00:41 > 0:00:43That is not what nature is for.
0:00:45 > 0:00:48- Always indicate. - ELIS LAUGHS
0:00:49 > 0:00:51It's a classic one-two combination.
0:00:55 > 0:00:57Ah! THEY LAUGH
0:00:59 > 0:01:01SHE LAUGHS
0:01:01 > 0:01:03The English have got the M1.
0:01:04 > 0:01:05Well, we've got that.
0:01:06 > 0:01:09I would like you to open that up and try eating it on camera.
0:01:09 > 0:01:11And then I'll tell you why.
0:01:11 > 0:01:13Great. OK, I haven't actually paid for that, Elis.
0:01:13 > 0:01:15That is now theft.
0:01:15 > 0:01:18- So, welcome to... - James.- And Jupp.
0:01:24 > 0:01:27So, for the first of our adventures, Miles,
0:01:27 > 0:01:29I thought I'd make things easy for you
0:01:29 > 0:01:30by starting quite near to where you live.
0:01:32 > 0:01:34Elis, you are a gentleman.
0:01:37 > 0:01:40I don't need to tell you at home, this is downtown Monmouth.
0:01:40 > 0:01:43It's a busy town, full of busy people.
0:01:43 > 0:01:46That is the Shire Hall, that is the statue to Charles Stewart Rolls,
0:01:46 > 0:01:47the man behind Rolls-Royce.
0:01:47 > 0:01:49I'm meeting Miles at nine o'clock.
0:01:49 > 0:01:51It's now eight minutes past, but that's fine.
0:01:51 > 0:01:53It's his prerogative to be...
0:01:53 > 0:01:55- Well, here he is.- Hello.
0:01:55 > 0:01:56- How are you, big man?- I'm all right.
0:01:56 > 0:01:58Not at all bad. Welcome to Monmouth.
0:01:58 > 0:02:01Thank you. I hope you're looking forward
0:02:01 > 0:02:04to me showing you all that Wales has to offer in a day.
0:02:04 > 0:02:06- In a day?- Yeah, yeah.
0:02:06 > 0:02:09- Er, OK. - We're going up Wales' Route 66.
0:02:09 > 0:02:10- Well, that sounds..- The A470.
0:02:10 > 0:02:12That sounds suitably white-knuckle.
0:02:12 > 0:02:15- Great.- Excellent. What are we travelling in?
0:02:15 > 0:02:17- Well...- Is this...
0:02:17 > 0:02:19is this perhaps a little clue as to what we're going to be...?
0:02:19 > 0:02:21Mr Charles Rolls?
0:02:21 > 0:02:22Who knows?
0:02:22 > 0:02:23Anyway...
0:02:23 > 0:02:25your steed awaits.
0:02:25 > 0:02:27Is it a sort of Silver Spirit or something?
0:02:27 > 0:02:28Not quite, Miles.
0:02:29 > 0:02:33This is the debut of the James and Jupp-mobile. Look at that.
0:02:34 > 0:02:37Do you want to put your suitcase in the back?
0:02:37 > 0:02:40I think you like this car rather more than I do, to be honest.
0:02:40 > 0:02:43Well, it's perfect for a series of trips around Wales,
0:02:43 > 0:02:46like this one from the soft posh bit around Monmouth to the altogether
0:02:46 > 0:02:48more manly part, the north,
0:02:48 > 0:02:50and our destination, Snowdonia.
0:02:50 > 0:02:54We've got one stop planned halfway up, near Rhayader, and by tonight
0:02:54 > 0:02:57we'll be in Trawsfynydd and have I got a treat for you there.
0:02:59 > 0:03:00Oh, super.
0:03:05 > 0:03:07This is Monnow Street.
0:03:07 > 0:03:10Just showing off some of my local knowledge there, which, let's face
0:03:10 > 0:03:12it, after we get past Abergavenny, tails off somewhat.
0:03:12 > 0:03:15Still, worth making the most of what little I have.
0:03:17 > 0:03:19Lovely early indicating, Elis.
0:03:19 > 0:03:20Excellent roundabout technique.
0:03:20 > 0:03:23Mm, thank you, Miles. Glad somebody noticed.
0:03:23 > 0:03:27And this is Rockfield Road, Elis, that you're driving round.
0:03:27 > 0:03:29- Is it?- You know where you're going?
0:03:29 > 0:03:31- Yeah.- You know the actual...
0:03:31 > 0:03:33In broad strokes, I don't know if you know the sort of actual...
0:03:33 > 0:03:38Queen, Led Zeppelin, Oasis, the Stone Roses, they all recorded here.
0:03:38 > 0:03:40Most stuff recorded at Rockfield Studio.
0:03:40 > 0:03:43Bohemian Rhapsody, for instance.
0:03:43 > 0:03:45Morning Glory was done at Rockfield.
0:03:45 > 0:03:47Er...the whole album?
0:03:47 > 0:03:49Yeah, I think so.
0:03:49 > 0:03:53# And all the roads that lead you there are winding
0:03:54 > 0:03:59# And all the lights that light the way are blinding
0:04:00 > 0:04:03# There are many things that I
0:04:03 > 0:04:05# Would like to say to you
0:04:05 > 0:04:07# But I don't know how... #
0:04:07 > 0:04:09It's funny, isn't it, because when you think of all the great records
0:04:09 > 0:04:11that were made at Rockfields,
0:04:11 > 0:04:14there also would've been some absolute dross.
0:04:14 > 0:04:16- Oh, yeah, yeah... - You know, statistically...
0:04:16 > 0:04:18Yeah, everything... Well, I once said to...
0:04:18 > 0:04:20- Do you know Rick Wakeman? - Oh, yeah, from Yes.
0:04:20 > 0:04:25Yeah. I was once sharing a dressing room with him on a charity gig.
0:04:25 > 0:04:27And I said to him,
0:04:27 > 0:04:30"I mean, you played the piano on Life On Mars, Rick."
0:04:30 > 0:04:31MUSIC: Life On Mars by David Bowie
0:04:31 > 0:04:33"That is such an amazing thing.
0:04:33 > 0:04:37"And every day when you wake up, how many minutes pass before you think,
0:04:37 > 0:04:39"I played the piano on Life On Mars"?
0:04:41 > 0:04:42And he said,
0:04:42 > 0:04:44"Well, you also have to remember how many Des O'Connor albums
0:04:44 > 0:04:47- "I played on." - ELIS LAUGHS
0:04:47 > 0:04:49# Dick-a-dum-dum a-dick-a-dum-dum
0:04:49 > 0:04:51# A-dick-a-dum-dum a-dick-a-dum-dum
0:04:51 > 0:04:53# Get a car, get a Mini car
0:04:53 > 0:04:57# Get a Mini go-go car And go, boy
0:04:57 > 0:05:00# Any time that the day is fine you can find a line of the boys
0:05:00 > 0:05:04# Who stop to seek that certain rare one
0:05:04 > 0:05:06# A-dick-a-dum-dum a-dick-a-dum-dum
0:05:06 > 0:05:09# A-dick-a-dum-dum a-dick-a-dum-dum. #
0:05:09 > 0:05:12We're not on it yet.
0:05:12 > 0:05:14But we will shortly be on the A470.
0:05:16 > 0:05:19Which is our Highway 61, it's our Route 66.
0:05:19 > 0:05:21Have you been on the A470 before, Miles?
0:05:21 > 0:05:23- I never have, actually.- Right.
0:05:23 > 0:05:24I've never gone that route.
0:05:24 > 0:05:25I've gone west quite often.
0:05:25 > 0:05:27- OK.- But I've not gone north.
0:05:27 > 0:05:28Well, it's a long old drive.
0:05:30 > 0:05:33And I hope you don't like the toilet.
0:05:33 > 0:05:35Because there are very few places to stop.
0:05:35 > 0:05:36Right.
0:05:40 > 0:05:44And if you get stuck behind a tractor,
0:05:44 > 0:05:47a journey that could take hours...will take years.
0:05:50 > 0:05:55See, this is a perfect example of what we're going to be stuck behind
0:05:55 > 0:05:58on the A470.
0:05:58 > 0:06:02I suppose being stuck behind a tractor that's going really slowly,
0:06:02 > 0:06:05you sort of think, "Well, it's enormous, it's hard to manoeuvre."
0:06:05 > 0:06:07And when you are stuck behind a bicycle...
0:06:07 > 0:06:09Yeah, drop-handled bike. ..you think...
0:06:09 > 0:06:12This is a pre-watershed programme so we're going to have to find
0:06:12 > 0:06:16- a pre-watershed way of...- Yeah. - ..expressing, erm,
0:06:16 > 0:06:19- frustration. - Oh, come on, you fridge!
0:06:19 > 0:06:21Yeah, that sort of... Yeah, exactly.
0:06:23 > 0:06:29- You... - Oh, move over, you stupid...goose.
0:06:29 > 0:06:31Yeah. Yeah, we could use fowl, couldn't we?
0:06:31 > 0:06:33Yeah.
0:06:33 > 0:06:35- Duck.- What a...
0:06:36 > 0:06:37..potted pigeon.
0:06:40 > 0:06:41Right, status report,
0:06:41 > 0:06:44we're taking the little B-road across to Abergavenny.
0:06:44 > 0:06:46We haven't hit the A470 yet...
0:06:46 > 0:06:50..the toiletlessness of which has already left me in a sweaty panic.
0:06:50 > 0:06:52Well, what happens is
0:06:52 > 0:06:54commuters from North to South Wales
0:06:54 > 0:06:57and vice versa who travel up and down the A470 a lot,
0:06:57 > 0:07:00they end up developing these camel-like bladders.
0:07:00 > 0:07:04- Oh, right.- I know a few North Walians based in Caernarfon...
0:07:04 > 0:07:08- And they can go for a fortnight. - Oh, yeah. Easily. Easily.
0:07:08 > 0:07:11So, I'm still feeling relatively at home in these parts,
0:07:11 > 0:07:12but for someone like yourself,
0:07:12 > 0:07:14born in Haverfordwest and raised in Carmarthen,
0:07:14 > 0:07:17I'm not sure if you even think this is proper Wales.
0:07:17 > 0:07:19I remember once being at a gig...
0:07:19 > 0:07:22In fact, I was doing the gig, you were compering.
0:07:22 > 0:07:24And you asked if there was anyone else Welsh in the audience.
0:07:24 > 0:07:27And someone said yes. And you said, "Where are you from?"
0:07:27 > 0:07:29And they said Monmouth and you went, "Doesn't count."
0:07:29 > 0:07:31I am good value.
0:07:31 > 0:07:34- Yeah, it was...- If there are any comedy bookers out there watching,
0:07:34 > 0:07:37that's the kind of gold you can expect from this guy.
0:07:39 > 0:07:41Right, we're making some progress.
0:07:41 > 0:07:43But we're still very much in South Wales.
0:07:43 > 0:07:45And I'm thinking, "Well, surely we're nearly there, aren't we?"
0:07:45 > 0:07:48And I'm thinking, "You definitely haven't done this journey before."
0:07:55 > 0:07:58So, this road is a little link through some pretty glorious
0:07:58 > 0:08:00countryside, actually,
0:08:00 > 0:08:03to what will be for us the first time we join the A470 -
0:08:03 > 0:08:05the big route north.
0:08:05 > 0:08:09OK. So I've eased you in a bit...
0:08:10 > 0:08:11- Er...- I've eased you in.
0:08:11 > 0:08:16- Uh-huh.- And the A470 begins...
0:08:16 > 0:08:18- now.- This is it, is it?
0:08:18 > 0:08:20- This is it!- Right.
0:08:20 > 0:08:22Well, it feels so different, instantly.
0:08:22 > 0:08:23- Yeah.- Goodness...
0:08:23 > 0:08:25Goodness! It's like going to another land.
0:08:25 > 0:08:28Well, it's like going into a different dimension, I always think.
0:08:28 > 0:08:30We are now in 5-D.
0:08:30 > 0:08:32Wow. Wow.
0:08:32 > 0:08:34- This is...- The A470...
0:08:34 > 0:08:37How do you say that? Llamfair-ym-Mult...?
0:08:37 > 0:08:38Llanfair-ym-Muallt.
0:08:38 > 0:08:40This is...
0:08:41 > 0:08:43This is the Wales you always knew it could be.
0:08:46 > 0:08:49But before you knew it, you've turned off the A470.
0:08:49 > 0:08:51Well, that's because, if you remember,
0:08:51 > 0:08:52I had a little detour to make.
0:08:52 > 0:08:54Oh, I do remember.
0:09:05 > 0:09:06So, this bridge...
0:09:08 > 0:09:11..was built in 1922...
0:09:11 > 0:09:12Yeah.
0:09:12 > 0:09:14..and I don't know what you think...
0:09:14 > 0:09:17- Are you reading all this off a sign, Elis?- Yeah.- OK.
0:09:17 > 0:09:20I don't know what you think the dictionary definition
0:09:20 > 0:09:23- of rickety is...- Oh. - CREAKING
0:09:23 > 0:09:24Listen to that.
0:09:26 > 0:09:29It's like the rope bridge in Indiana Jones And The Temple Of Doom.
0:09:32 > 0:09:34How big a drop is that, do you think?
0:09:34 > 0:09:35It would give you a shock, I think.
0:09:35 > 0:09:38- The water's also... - Well, it's into shallow water.
0:09:38 > 0:09:40That would be one of the most shocking things about it.
0:09:40 > 0:09:42It's about a foot deep. You'd probably break both your ankles
0:09:42 > 0:09:45and end up with a superb anecdote.
0:09:45 > 0:09:48I reckon you'd have time to make one wry remark before we hit the...
0:09:48 > 0:09:50Yeah.
0:09:50 > 0:09:51I think I'd just bomb it.
0:09:51 > 0:09:53I think you'd be an eyebrow lift.
0:09:53 > 0:09:54Oh...
0:09:54 > 0:09:55Oh, here we go.
0:09:55 > 0:09:58- Yeah. "Oh!"- "Oh, it never rains!"
0:10:01 > 0:10:04Right, we're hanging a Larry, er...
0:10:04 > 0:10:05What's happening now, then?
0:10:08 > 0:10:12Well, this road... I've taken you off the A470 because this road...
0:10:12 > 0:10:13Lovely straight road, actually.
0:10:13 > 0:10:17It runs parallel to the old railway track.
0:10:17 > 0:10:20In fact, I think this WAS the old railway track.
0:10:20 > 0:10:23- Now, look at this. - This was an old railway bridge.
0:10:23 > 0:10:24Lovely.
0:10:25 > 0:10:28Lovely road and all that, but there was something else quite pressing
0:10:28 > 0:10:30that I really needed to broach at this point.
0:10:31 > 0:10:33Do you think this is the hottest day of the year?
0:10:33 > 0:10:35I think so. I think this is the hottest day in history.
0:10:35 > 0:10:37Of the decade possibly.
0:10:37 > 0:10:39I can feel my... I'm so hot I can actually feel
0:10:39 > 0:10:41my body changing shape.
0:10:41 > 0:10:45The director had told us to keep the air-con off and the windows shut.
0:10:45 > 0:10:47I'm really looking forward to
0:10:47 > 0:10:49- a moment we can open the windows again, Elis...- Me too.
0:10:49 > 0:10:51Do you mind if I have a quick short blast?
0:10:51 > 0:10:53WINDOW SQUEAKS
0:10:53 > 0:10:56- Oh, yeah. VOICEOVER:- We are such rebels.
0:11:00 > 0:11:03So, after lunch in Builth Wells...
0:11:03 > 0:11:06We needed to get some miles under our belt.
0:11:06 > 0:11:08And things were improving.
0:11:08 > 0:11:10The weather was even cooling a little.
0:11:10 > 0:11:13And we had a date with nature at a farm just outside Rhayader.
0:11:23 > 0:11:26- So, we've finally stepped out of the car...- Mm.
0:11:26 > 0:11:29..to experience our first bit of cloud cover of the day.
0:11:29 > 0:11:31- That's nice, isn't it? - Yeah, I love it.
0:11:31 > 0:11:32But, anyway, where are we and why?
0:11:32 > 0:11:35We are at a red kite feeding centre.
0:11:35 > 0:11:37The red kite, Wales' bald eagle.
0:11:40 > 0:11:41Previously endangered.
0:11:41 > 0:11:44Now, because of places like this, loads of them.
0:11:44 > 0:11:45Right. Too many?
0:11:45 > 0:11:46Too many, if anything, yeah.
0:11:46 > 0:11:49They're a pest. I have a little challenge for you.
0:11:49 > 0:11:50I've been given two very snazzy cameras.
0:11:50 > 0:11:55And the challenge is we need to take a cracking photo of a red kite.
0:11:55 > 0:11:57- Like the one on the back wall there.- Yeah.
0:11:57 > 0:12:00It's a cracking shot, but I think photography is just point and shoot,
0:12:00 > 0:12:02- isn't it?- OK, I want those words to be reverberating
0:12:02 > 0:12:04- around your skull... - All right, fair enough.
0:12:04 > 0:12:07- ..when you're handed second prize. - Maybe I'm wrong. I'm probably wrong.
0:12:07 > 0:12:11In our very small red kite photography competition.
0:12:14 > 0:12:17But the birds won't pose for us at all if they're not fed,
0:12:17 > 0:12:20so it was off to the hides, where Colin, the head of offal,
0:12:20 > 0:12:22was waiting to meet us.
0:12:22 > 0:12:25- Hi, guys. Hi, Elis.- Hello, nice to meet you, Colin.- Miles.
0:12:25 > 0:12:27- Hi, Colin, how are you?- You're going to come in the tractor with me,
0:12:27 > 0:12:30- are you, today?- Yeah.- Feed some kites.- Looking forward to it.
0:12:30 > 0:12:31Am I appropriately dressed for it?
0:12:31 > 0:12:35- It's just been sprung on me by Elis. - Not too muddy there today.
0:12:35 > 0:12:37Jump in then, Miles, and we'll go and feed the kites.
0:12:41 > 0:12:45This was perhaps the pinnacle of my television career to date,
0:12:45 > 0:12:48distributing bits of liver, brain, toes,
0:12:48 > 0:12:53other unmentionables and testicles, all in front of an eager crowd.
0:12:53 > 0:12:54Not exactly fine dining.
0:12:58 > 0:13:02He's not dressed appropriately for throwing offal with a spade at all.
0:13:02 > 0:13:04Put your back into it, man.
0:13:05 > 0:13:07And then something unexpected happened.
0:13:07 > 0:13:09Very few birds appeared.
0:13:09 > 0:13:13- For ages.- Yes, we were poised in the hide, but no birds to speak of.
0:13:13 > 0:13:16In fact, we ended up taking pictures of ourselves.
0:13:16 > 0:13:19Then a few more appeared - but still nothing to get excited about.
0:13:19 > 0:13:22Why aren't they more interested in my meat?
0:13:22 > 0:13:25I've absolutely... I've flung...
0:13:25 > 0:13:28personally, 20kg of raw meat over...
0:13:28 > 0:13:31- BIRD SHRIEKS - Hello.
0:13:36 > 0:13:37And then it happened.
0:13:40 > 0:13:42With one fell swoop, literally,
0:13:42 > 0:13:46this was the signal for the red kite task force to make their way to the
0:13:46 > 0:13:48target zone, and begin Operation Offal.
0:13:50 > 0:13:52Suddenly, we had too many photo opportunities.
0:14:02 > 0:14:04"Colin the Offal" had given me a tip
0:14:04 > 0:14:06to pick just one bird with your camera and
0:14:06 > 0:14:07keep following it.
0:14:09 > 0:14:12Which was a bit of advice that I wasn't given.
0:14:12 > 0:14:15I've been trying to take the definitive photo of a red kite
0:14:15 > 0:14:19and I've now taken 776 photos and I think they are all rubbish.
0:14:20 > 0:14:24Right then, El, let's go and find out who's the winner.
0:14:24 > 0:14:26Bitter, bitter competition time.
0:14:26 > 0:14:28ELIS LAUGHS
0:14:28 > 0:14:30Time to see Elis' work.
0:14:30 > 0:14:32- Chaos...- Chaos.- ..chaos,
0:14:32 > 0:14:34- chaos...- Chaos.- More chaos.
0:14:34 > 0:14:36Anxiety dream... MILES LAUGHS
0:14:36 > 0:14:38..anxiety dream, anxiety dream...
0:14:38 > 0:14:41OK, Miles, let's see your efforts.
0:14:41 > 0:14:44Oh. Oh, there we are. That was a little bit of Elis James.
0:14:44 > 0:14:46Look, the little French boy.
0:14:46 > 0:14:48IN FRENCH ACCENT: Hello, hello. My name is Elis,
0:14:48 > 0:14:50I'm a French exchange student. Hello!
0:14:53 > 0:14:55Yeah. Well, I think...
0:14:57 > 0:15:00..through sheer good luck, you've taken in some quite nice photos,
0:15:00 > 0:15:02- Miles.- I don't mind it, mate.- Yeah?
0:15:02 > 0:15:04- I don't mind it, mate. - This chap's attacking...
0:15:04 > 0:15:06I mean, they are just... Ooh!
0:15:06 > 0:15:08I don't mind it, mate.
0:15:08 > 0:15:12Sadly, I'm going to have to admit that you've won, I think.
0:15:16 > 0:15:18I think I need to get you back on the road.
0:15:18 > 0:15:22The sun is just starting to break through again.
0:15:22 > 0:15:24If it's as hot this afternoon as it was this morning,
0:15:24 > 0:15:27I'm going to be in a state of complete despair.
0:15:29 > 0:15:32Back on the A470,
0:15:32 > 0:15:34through Rhayader...
0:15:34 > 0:15:36and the open road.
0:15:36 > 0:15:39And the sun was back, beating its heart out onto our little Mini,
0:15:39 > 0:15:41but we didn't care.
0:15:41 > 0:15:46No, we were enjoying ourselves and soaking up the glories of Mid Wales.
0:15:56 > 0:15:57So, where is this, El?
0:15:57 > 0:15:59This is Caersws.
0:16:00 > 0:16:02Now, then.
0:16:02 > 0:16:04I've been told
0:16:04 > 0:16:09that there's something very interesting down this little street.
0:16:09 > 0:16:11- Oh, yeah? - But I'm not entirely sure what.
0:16:11 > 0:16:14But apparently, it will become apparent when we see it.
0:16:14 > 0:16:18- Is it...? - It can't be Caersws Village Club.
0:16:18 > 0:16:21- Surely not.- A pub umbrella that's been blown over by the wind?
0:16:21 > 0:16:24- Could it be that? - Maybe. Nice little church.
0:16:36 > 0:16:38Houses with swastikas on...?
0:16:44 > 0:16:45What have we got there, then?
0:16:45 > 0:16:48From what I can tell,
0:16:48 > 0:16:51it's a row of fascist houses.
0:16:57 > 0:17:01- Extraordinary.- Presumably they were built before the 1930s.
0:17:02 > 0:17:04- Because why else would they have...? - Also they're backwards.
0:17:04 > 0:17:08Why else would you have a brickwork swastika in your house?
0:17:08 > 0:17:11WINDOW SQUEAKING DROWNS SPEECH
0:17:11 > 0:17:16Do you think that increases or decreases the value of the house?
0:17:16 > 0:17:18Having a swastika on it? I would have thought it...
0:17:18 > 0:17:21- Do you know what it reminds me of? It reminds...- If you look on a
0:17:21 > 0:17:23property website and it says put in keywords, specific things you're
0:17:23 > 0:17:27looking for... "Two beds, garden, want to be within 15 minutes' walk
0:17:27 > 0:17:28of a train station...
0:17:28 > 0:17:30"Must have a swastika on the front."
0:17:30 > 0:17:33It reminds me of that house in Swansea that looks like Hitler.
0:17:33 > 0:17:37Oh, yeah, yeah, that's right.
0:17:37 > 0:17:38Well, I'm absolutely amazed.
0:17:44 > 0:17:46Back on the road again.
0:17:46 > 0:17:50And a chance at last for some sensible conversation.
0:17:56 > 0:18:02Now, where we are now, Elis, it's unmistakably Wales.
0:18:02 > 0:18:07I mean, it's very lush, very green. Verdant.
0:18:07 > 0:18:08Oh, good word!
0:18:08 > 0:18:12But it's not, erm...
0:18:12 > 0:18:13It's not rugged, is it?
0:18:13 > 0:18:16Right. We are still in Mid Wales.
0:18:16 > 0:18:19We've just come out of Caersws.
0:18:19 > 0:18:20That's Mid Wales, man.
0:18:20 > 0:18:21That's as mid as it gets.
0:18:21 > 0:18:28- Yeah.- In terms of ruggedness, we are at the five o'clock shadow stage.
0:18:28 > 0:18:31We're going to get to the Bwlch Pass, which is where you could argue
0:18:31 > 0:18:33North Wales starts,
0:18:33 > 0:18:38then that is long beard down to the waist rugged.
0:18:38 > 0:18:41- I mean... - Trendy butcher-beard rugged.
0:18:41 > 0:18:44You turn a corner and then suddenly...
0:18:44 > 0:18:46It's brutal.
0:18:46 > 0:18:49It's brutal. It's brutal scenery.
0:18:49 > 0:18:53It's the kind of stuff, that if it was
0:18:53 > 0:18:56a part of the Tour de France, the commentators would go,
0:18:56 > 0:19:01"Oh, you're really going to feel it now in your legs.
0:19:01 > 0:19:04"Look at these steep, steep hills.
0:19:04 > 0:19:06"How's that for an ascent?"
0:19:06 > 0:19:08- Etc.- OK, yeah.
0:19:08 > 0:19:10Are you one of those people that finds yourself,
0:19:10 > 0:19:13you're so immersed in sports that you're able to
0:19:13 > 0:19:17slip into sort of commentary mode
0:19:17 > 0:19:18- at the drop of a hat?- Yeah.
0:19:18 > 0:19:21If I was doing a long drive like this on my own,
0:19:21 > 0:19:23I would choose a football match
0:19:23 > 0:19:25and then I would commentate on it in my mind.
0:19:26 > 0:19:28And you would do that out loud?
0:19:28 > 0:19:29Yeah, yeah, of course.
0:19:29 > 0:19:33And if I'm giving a lift to another comic who also likes football,
0:19:33 > 0:19:36- we'll do that as well.- So I could be the assistant commentator and I can
0:19:36 > 0:19:40- just throw an extra... - The Merseyside Derby...- Yeah.
0:19:40 > 0:19:44..famously known as the friendly Derby, but today...
0:19:45 > 0:19:46..it's a city divided.
0:19:48 > 0:19:51Quite right, Gary. That's what the other guy needs to say, isn't it?
0:19:51 > 0:19:54- Yeah.- Is that your job if you're the assistant commentator?- Yeah.
0:19:54 > 0:19:55Go, "Quite right, Gary"?
0:19:55 > 0:19:58We are driving through,
0:19:58 > 0:20:01I would class it as five o'clock shadow rugged terrain.
0:20:01 > 0:20:04Certainly not beard-down-to-the-waist
0:20:04 > 0:20:06trendy-butcher rugged terrain.
0:20:06 > 0:20:10The sort of thing that people might refer to as Welsh countryside, Gary.
0:20:12 > 0:20:15The undulating hills, there's trees away to our left and ahead of us,
0:20:15 > 0:20:18a range of hills, I'm sure you know the names of the hills, Gary.
0:20:18 > 0:20:24Course I do. This is the kind of rugged countryside that someone like
0:20:24 > 0:20:26Bradley Wiggins laps up.
0:20:26 > 0:20:28He laps it up.
0:20:28 > 0:20:30Now, I've seen a wind farm.
0:20:30 > 0:20:32Hello, what's that up ahead?
0:20:32 > 0:20:34Look up, easy as I like,
0:20:34 > 0:20:37a couple of them right up on the hill, round they go
0:20:37 > 0:20:38in an anti-clockwise fashion.
0:20:38 > 0:20:40Not the way I'd have done it myself.
0:20:40 > 0:20:41But it seems to work for them.
0:20:41 > 0:20:45Generating electricity for boys and girls, men and women,
0:20:45 > 0:20:48however you self-identify, enabling you to put the kettle on
0:20:48 > 0:20:50or maybe switch on your laptop
0:20:50 > 0:20:54or perhaps simply to plug in an Ambi Pur and get rid of that appalling
0:20:54 > 0:20:58smell that for some reason hangs around your living room.
0:20:58 > 0:20:59Excellent people, of course,
0:20:59 > 0:21:01those that work for the renewable energy section.
0:21:01 > 0:21:05And we send them, as ever, our best on this day,
0:21:05 > 0:21:08which is of course derby day.
0:21:08 > 0:21:09A lot of action out there in the stands.
0:21:09 > 0:21:11A hell of a lot of fans there, they're mingling,
0:21:11 > 0:21:13they're enjoying fun. High spirits, I think.
0:21:13 > 0:21:15I happened to walk...
0:21:15 > 0:21:17Make my own way through the streets to the ground,
0:21:17 > 0:21:19Gary, and I was impressed...
0:21:19 > 0:21:21I was impressed with the atmosphere out there.
0:21:21 > 0:21:23The bonhomie, if you will,
0:21:23 > 0:21:27the atmosphere of convivencia that's spread throughout people from both
0:21:27 > 0:21:30sides, taking it in turns to hold each other's hands
0:21:30 > 0:21:31and singing songs.
0:21:31 > 0:21:34Couple of cheeky ones, but I think we're prepared to forgive them on a
0:21:34 > 0:21:36day such as this.
0:21:36 > 0:21:41Lot of Bovril of course on sale in the cafe underneath the stands.
0:21:41 > 0:21:45I myself am looking forward to half-time in order to get a nice hot
0:21:45 > 0:21:50pie that I can eat as we deliver our award-winning analysis of the game.
0:21:50 > 0:21:53Just a few moments away now from kick-off,
0:21:53 > 0:21:55time to have a look at the teams. If you talk us through them, Gary.
0:21:55 > 0:21:58Either way, as we come into Cwmllinau
0:21:58 > 0:22:01on the hottest day of the year...
0:22:01 > 0:22:04Quite right, Gary, the hottest day of the year.
0:22:04 > 0:22:08There are bits of me that are wet that I didn't know had sweat glands.
0:22:14 > 0:22:17You're right. It is such a long way.
0:22:18 > 0:22:20But we've made some progress and we're now entering
0:22:20 > 0:22:22Snowdonia National Park.
0:22:34 > 0:22:35- Oh, hang on.- Now, look at this.
0:22:35 > 0:22:37Look, look, look.
0:22:37 > 0:22:38- Yeah.- Suddenly...
0:22:38 > 0:22:40It's...
0:22:40 > 0:22:44Suddenly it's a five o'clock shadow turning into...
0:22:44 > 0:22:47- a week-long...- Suddenly soft...
0:22:47 > 0:22:51Soft grassy hills suddenly turning into something rather different.
0:22:53 > 0:22:56Now these... We're driving up through I believe what are called
0:22:56 > 0:22:58interlocking spurs.
0:22:58 > 0:23:01- Are we?- I think that's what they're called, yeah.
0:23:01 > 0:23:04If you lived here, how could you ever feel sad?
0:23:04 > 0:23:05- Snowdonia?- Yeah.
0:23:05 > 0:23:07I would just
0:23:07 > 0:23:11stare at that and think, "It's not bad, is it, life?"
0:23:11 > 0:23:13# You got the love
0:23:13 > 0:23:14# You got the love
0:23:14 > 0:23:17# You got the love
0:23:19 > 0:23:22# You got the love
0:23:22 > 0:23:23# You got the love
0:23:23 > 0:23:26# You got the love
0:23:28 > 0:23:30# You got the love
0:23:30 > 0:23:32# You got the love
0:23:32 > 0:23:36# You got the love
0:23:37 > 0:23:39# You got the love
0:23:39 > 0:23:41# You got the love
0:23:41 > 0:23:45# You got the love
0:23:45 > 0:23:51# Love. #
0:24:09 > 0:24:12Absolutely stunning.
0:24:12 > 0:24:14Well, after that, we just had to get out, didn't we?
0:24:14 > 0:24:16It was absolutely incredible up there.
0:24:18 > 0:24:20But a little on the windy side, though.
0:24:20 > 0:24:23True, but then, it was very hot in the car, did we mention that?
0:24:28 > 0:24:29Oh!
0:24:29 > 0:24:31Argh!
0:24:31 > 0:24:32Ah!
0:24:34 > 0:24:38Whoa! That is...that is bracing.
0:24:38 > 0:24:41That is what you need as well, though, after a drive in this sort
0:24:41 > 0:24:42- of temperature.- Do you know what?
0:24:42 > 0:24:45The English have got the M1.
0:24:45 > 0:24:46And we've got that.
0:24:50 > 0:24:52Chug, chug, chugging along.
0:24:52 > 0:24:55Still, to come here, having started in, what, Monmouth,
0:24:55 > 0:24:58we met up in this morning, a few hours in the car, suddenly,
0:24:58 > 0:25:00look at this, it's incredible.
0:25:00 > 0:25:03But, really, it's the wind I'm appreciating right now after sitting
0:25:03 > 0:25:05in that hot car for all that time.
0:25:05 > 0:25:06I do, I want to...
0:25:06 > 0:25:09take my trousers off and...
0:25:09 > 0:25:13just let my body hang like washing in the breeze.
0:25:13 > 0:25:14I like a long drive,
0:25:14 > 0:25:19if only helicopter travel was more affordable for the commuter.
0:25:19 > 0:25:23- Yeah.- It would revolutionise North-South Wales relations.
0:25:25 > 0:25:28That really is it? That is... That's the MAIN road?
0:25:28 > 0:25:31- That's it.- Extraordinary. - That's the main arterial road.
0:25:33 > 0:25:35If you've got a meeting in Cardiff, mate...
0:25:37 > 0:25:39- Crikey. - ..that's what you want to do.
0:25:39 > 0:25:41But you do get to see all this.
0:25:41 > 0:25:44- Yeah.- And if you are a bit hot in the car, you can just get out,
0:25:44 > 0:25:47wander into a field and just sort of stretch yourself out a bit...
0:25:47 > 0:25:50- Commune.- ..and allow yourself to be wind-dried.
0:25:50 > 0:25:51Commune with nature.
0:25:51 > 0:25:53Chat with the sheep.
0:25:53 > 0:25:56If we weren't making a sort of TV series right now, I mean,
0:25:56 > 0:25:58- I'd have all of this off.- Oh, yeah.
0:25:58 > 0:26:01Aw, these trousers would be a thing of the past.
0:26:11 > 0:26:13So, with the Bwlch Pass behind us,
0:26:13 > 0:26:16it's now a long descent into the foothills of Snowdonia.
0:26:18 > 0:26:20And you need to look lively, Miles,
0:26:20 > 0:26:21because we are nearly at journey's end.
0:26:24 > 0:26:26I've chosen here as our stop for the night
0:26:26 > 0:26:29because there's more to this place than meets the eye.
0:26:34 > 0:26:36VOICEOVER: Ah, there's Margaret, the owner.
0:26:36 > 0:26:39- VOICEOVER:- Margaret, the owner, who you appear to dress like.
0:26:39 > 0:26:43Yes, and it is a look that works for both of us.
0:26:43 > 0:26:46Anyway, this is the treat I had in store for you.
0:26:46 > 0:26:49Yes, this is the only B&B in the whole of Snowdonia National Park -
0:26:49 > 0:26:53and I've googled this - that offers en suite model railway facilities.
0:27:00 > 0:27:02Oh, I see, and it's got platform announcements.
0:27:02 > 0:27:04Oh, there's loads of trains.
0:27:04 > 0:27:07I hope those platform announcements are bilingual, Margaret.
0:27:08 > 0:27:11And if they're not, I will gladly do the voice-overs.
0:27:11 > 0:27:13Oh, excellent. Excellent.
0:27:14 > 0:27:17What is the Welsh for rail replacement bus service?
0:27:17 > 0:27:19THEY LAUGH
0:27:23 > 0:27:27At this point, I had a quick lesson from Elis' style icon, Margaret,
0:27:27 > 0:27:28on how to control the train.
0:27:28 > 0:27:31Then tried to get Elis with the old speed up...
0:27:32 > 0:27:35..slow down...speed up again trick.
0:27:38 > 0:27:40Well, it passed the time.
0:27:42 > 0:27:47And now, for Mr James and Mr Jupp, their arduous journey was at an end.
0:27:47 > 0:27:49It's been quite a day, hasn't it?
0:27:49 > 0:27:53Yeah, and this is actually just the start of our North Wales adventure.
0:27:53 > 0:27:54Oh, yes.
0:27:54 > 0:27:56There'll be much, much more
0:27:56 > 0:27:58next time.
0:28:01 > 0:28:04What could improve a beautiful lake?
0:28:04 > 0:28:07A decommissioned nuclear power station.
0:28:07 > 0:28:09I see your full bladder
0:28:09 > 0:28:11and raise you a full bowel.
0:28:11 > 0:28:14So I'm sort of, erm, climbing up Snowdon...
0:28:14 > 0:28:16We're going up a mountain,
0:28:16 > 0:28:18he's talking as if he's, like, choosing what to wear at the BAFTAs.
0:28:18 > 0:28:20- I feel pretty cool actually. - You look it.
0:28:20 > 0:28:24I think that anyone who gets the train up is a wimp.
0:28:24 > 0:28:26We've been up further than you!
0:28:26 > 0:28:29I like to do things the easy way!
0:28:29 > 0:28:31Do you think the thinness of the air is making us talk rubbish?
0:28:31 > 0:28:33ELIS LAUGHS