0:00:02 > 0:00:07- I'm off to do my telly show, you going to be all right on your own? - Yeah.- Yeah.
0:00:10 > 0:00:15Oh, if Social Services come round tell them I'm just taking a dump.
0:00:15 > 0:00:17Later.
0:00:18 > 0:00:24This programme contains adult humour and strong language.
0:00:39 > 0:00:44Lee Nelson's Well Good Show, qwaliteeeee.
0:00:44 > 0:00:46CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:00:51 > 0:00:54Yeeeees!
0:00:54 > 0:00:58Hello, hello, love the glasses, you legend.
0:00:58 > 0:01:00You're nice, innit?
0:01:00 > 0:01:06Yeah, I'm in there. Hello, hello, hello, hello, spread the love.
0:01:06 > 0:01:10Spread the love all the way back there, yes!
0:01:10 > 0:01:12The man over here, what is that curly hair?
0:01:12 > 0:01:15Sweetie pie!
0:01:16 > 0:01:19Welcome to Lee Nelson's Well Good Show,
0:01:19 > 0:01:22I'm Lee Nelson!
0:01:25 > 0:01:30Yeah, joining me on my show tonight, he's always out of breath,
0:01:30 > 0:01:34but I love him to death, it's my best mate Omelette.
0:01:34 > 0:01:36CHEERING
0:01:38 > 0:01:42Yeah, my nan's going to be singing a carnival classic.
0:01:42 > 0:01:44CHEERING
0:01:44 > 0:01:46Hello, Nan.
0:01:46 > 0:01:50And I'll be trying to take a cheeky look down that girl's top.
0:01:53 > 0:01:58It's Lee Nelson's Well Good Show. Qwaliteeeee!
0:02:00 > 0:02:03People, people, people, I am in the mood of my life.
0:02:03 > 0:02:06Omelette finally done it with a girl.
0:02:06 > 0:02:07CHEERING
0:02:09 > 0:02:13Yeeees. The idiot went on top, now he's up for manslaughter.
0:02:16 > 0:02:19We is going to have a proper, proper laugh tonight.
0:02:19 > 0:02:22I'll talk to youse, you talk to mes,
0:02:22 > 0:02:25I'll take the piss, you'll take the piss...
0:02:25 > 0:02:27Do you know what I mean?
0:02:27 > 0:02:31That way at the end of the night, someone gets bottled.
0:02:31 > 0:02:34Heads up, it might well be you, geezer.
0:02:35 > 0:02:40That cardigan is 100% fucking wrong, innit?
0:02:40 > 0:02:42That has got to come off, innit, people?
0:02:42 > 0:02:44Off, off, off,
0:02:44 > 0:02:47off, off, off, off, off off...
0:02:52 > 0:02:53Yeah!
0:02:53 > 0:02:57Yes, yes, that's disgusting.
0:02:57 > 0:02:59Trousers, trousers, trousers,
0:02:59 > 0:03:02trousers, trousers, trousers.
0:03:02 > 0:03:05He's loving his trousers.
0:03:05 > 0:03:08This one over here just come out the closet, you legend.
0:03:09 > 0:03:12No, man, you shouldn't judge people on their clothes.
0:03:12 > 0:03:18I don't know, sweetie pie, over here, do people look at you and think, hooker?
0:03:19 > 0:03:25Innit? And that's, that's wrong, you know, she's much classier than that, people.
0:03:25 > 0:03:26She's an escort.
0:03:29 > 0:03:32Everyone gets judged, you know. Does everyone here get judged?
0:03:32 > 0:03:35I'm going to look at different people. Boys, what about you?
0:03:35 > 0:03:37What do people think when they look at you?
0:03:37 > 0:03:40- I don't know. - No? I'm looking at you thinking...
0:03:42 > 0:03:43..I'd rather you weren't here.
0:03:49 > 0:03:51Look at you, geezer, with your leather jacket.
0:03:51 > 0:03:55Yes, is that the mum there? She thought that was a good idea.
0:03:55 > 0:03:59And you let her do that, you idiot, my man.
0:03:59 > 0:04:02No, youse is nice, youse is like a yummy mummy, innit, sweetie pie?
0:04:02 > 0:04:06She is very, very nice, innit? I'd definitely bang your mum.
0:04:10 > 0:04:12I get judged all the time, you know.
0:04:12 > 0:04:15A couple of months ago I got judged day after day after day
0:04:15 > 0:04:19by this group of idiots, fucking... jury.
0:04:21 > 0:04:24I was there cos I got caught shoplifting at Tesco's.
0:04:24 > 0:04:29Now, that was my own stupid fault, man, I should never have asked for the Clubcard points.
0:04:29 > 0:04:33Omelette, have youse ever got caught shoplifting?
0:04:33 > 0:04:37- Yeah, I nicked some penny sweets once.- Oh, you legend, how many did you steal?
0:04:37 > 0:04:39About 35,000.
0:04:41 > 0:04:46I got arrested by a copper on a bicycle.
0:04:46 > 0:04:49That shit is humiliating, people!
0:04:49 > 0:04:54I got taken down to the station with me sat in the fucking basket.
0:04:54 > 0:04:59Anyone here got arrested? Sweetie pie, you ever got arrested?
0:04:59 > 0:05:00No.
0:05:00 > 0:05:02No. That's weird,
0:05:02 > 0:05:04I thought it would be illegal to look that fit.
0:05:07 > 0:05:13Hey, babe, yeah? If you was a burger in McDonalds, you'd be a McGorgeous.
0:05:13 > 0:05:17Innit? Cos she's got well nice buns.
0:05:19 > 0:05:21I would love to munch on her happy meal.
0:05:24 > 0:05:27Take a look at her. You know she comes with a toy.
0:05:38 > 0:05:42Who had a big grin on their face while I was doing all that? Geez, you legend up here?
0:05:42 > 0:05:44You loved that, you loved that.
0:05:44 > 0:05:48My man over here was grinning away while I was doing all my McDonald's stuff.
0:05:48 > 0:05:51Come here, you legend, innit? You dirty old fucker, he was loving that.
0:05:51 > 0:05:54He was loving that, he hadn't seen action in a while, innit.
0:05:54 > 0:05:57It's just him and the fucking shed.
0:05:58 > 0:06:02Welcome, geez, welcome, 100%. How old is you?
0:06:02 > 0:06:04Er, 58.
0:06:04 > 0:06:06- 58?- Yeah.
0:06:08 > 0:06:11He might be able to get away with that online.
0:06:19 > 0:06:23Welcome, welcome, you legend, you still fit and well and everything like that?
0:06:23 > 0:06:26- Very fit and well, thank you, yes. - Yeah, fucking come on then.
0:06:29 > 0:06:34Oh, my gosh, listen. Every single person is welcome on my telly show, do you know what I mean?
0:06:34 > 0:06:38From the posh people over here right to the scum at the back.
0:06:38 > 0:06:43Old fella up there, youse is hanging out with someone who looks quite a posh girl next to you.
0:06:43 > 0:06:49- Is you quite posh, sweetie pie? - I think I am, yes.- There we go, I knew it, innit.
0:06:54 > 0:06:57- Shall we do a posh test on her, find out how posh she is?- Yeah.
0:06:57 > 0:06:59Who's up for a posh test?
0:06:59 > 0:07:00CHEERING
0:07:00 > 0:07:04Posh test, posh test, posh test,
0:07:04 > 0:07:07posh test, posh test, posh test!
0:07:07 > 0:07:13Woo, posh test, yeah. Sweetie pie, posh test, what's your name, baby?
0:07:13 > 0:07:17- Annie.- Annie, oh, that's posh, innit? That's posh.
0:07:17 > 0:07:22Oh, let's think. Do you carry a cash card or a credit card or both?
0:07:22 > 0:07:25- Er, both.- Both, oooh.
0:07:25 > 0:07:27All right, let's think.
0:07:27 > 0:07:32OK, what is your pin number?
0:07:35 > 0:07:40I like the posh people cos they just do things a little bit differently, that's the truth of the matter.
0:07:40 > 0:07:45Like normal people, I don't know, like who's like me or you or something, innit,
0:07:45 > 0:07:52we'd be like down it, down it, down it, down it, smoke some weed, smoke some weed, innit...
0:07:52 > 0:07:57But the posh people, they're like, sip it, sip it, sip it.
0:07:57 > 0:08:02Smoke some salmon, smoke some salmon.
0:08:04 > 0:08:07They're mental with their manners, innit?
0:08:07 > 0:08:11Have you ever done that? Like they have the big fork and the big knife
0:08:11 > 0:08:15and then the slightly smaller fork and the slightly smaller knife
0:08:15 > 0:08:20and then the slightly smaller... Fucking hell, man, it's only a fucking pizza!
0:08:20 > 0:08:24Ridiculous, innit? And they talk a bit different, that's the truth of the matter.
0:08:24 > 0:08:27Normal people will talk a bit different to the posh people. Like posh people...
0:08:27 > 0:08:33A posh person would say, "It's OK, my kids are being looked after by my staff."
0:08:33 > 0:08:36Normal people like me and you will be like,
0:08:36 > 0:08:40"It's OK, my kids are being looked after by my Staffs."
0:08:42 > 0:08:48You cannot teach posh, it is either in the family or it ain't in the family.
0:08:48 > 0:08:54- Like, sweetheart, you know your parents?- I do know my parents. - Yeah, there we go, youse is posh.
0:09:01 > 0:09:07Quality. People youse knows what's coming next, it's Jason Bent!
0:09:09 > 0:09:12Jason Bent is one of the Premier League's brightest talents
0:09:12 > 0:09:16and we've been given 110% access to his life.
0:09:20 > 0:09:24This is 110% Bent.
0:09:27 > 0:09:31Ending weeks of speculation and negative press surrounding his future,
0:09:31 > 0:09:36Jason's finally put pen to paper on a new five-year contract
0:09:36 > 0:09:40and gives an exclusive interview to BBC Radio 5 Live's Mark Chapman.
0:09:40 > 0:09:43This is 5 Live Sport with Mark Chapman.
0:09:46 > 0:09:49Jason, welcome to 5 Live Sport.
0:09:49 > 0:09:53You've just signed your new deal and yet there's been a lot of paper talk
0:09:53 > 0:09:57that you felt the club lacked ambition, that you were bigger than the club
0:09:57 > 0:10:00and that you were going to walk away unless you were made the highest paid player,
0:10:00 > 0:10:03so where do you think all these rumours have come from?
0:10:03 > 0:10:08Well, I got me suspicions. Eeerm, and I'm pretty sure it was me.
0:10:08 > 0:10:11And you know, I just wanted to be paid what I thought I deserved.
0:10:11 > 0:10:15The previous contract was only worth a 115 grand a week,
0:10:15 > 0:10:18which is obviously very hard to get by on.
0:10:18 > 0:10:23And I was walking around the club and seeing players like Ricardo on 190 grand a week
0:10:23 > 0:10:26and you know, with all due respect to Ricardo,
0:10:26 > 0:10:29I scored 30 odd goals last season, he didn't get a single one.
0:10:29 > 0:10:31Now I'm not saying he's not a decent keeper.
0:10:33 > 0:10:36So the supporters, did they influence your decision to stay?
0:10:36 > 0:10:39Yeah, the supporters had a massive influence on me staying.
0:10:39 > 0:10:44Eeerm, you know, especially when about 50 of them in balaclavas surrounded me house chanting,
0:10:44 > 0:10:47"Stay, stay, stay or we'll break your fucking legs."
0:10:47 > 0:10:49Erm, so yeah, the fans have been magnificent.
0:10:49 > 0:10:55Now you were quoted, weren't you, as being worried about the direction the club was going in
0:10:55 > 0:10:58so are you satisfied now with how the future looks at the club?
0:10:58 > 0:10:59Yes, I am.
0:10:59 > 0:11:04Eeeerm, I met with the new Chinese owners and with Chairman Mao...
0:11:05 > 0:11:08..and I said to them, what direction is the club going in?
0:11:08 > 0:11:10And they said the Far East.
0:11:10 > 0:11:14And the new Chinese owners told me they've got a lot of money to spend,
0:11:14 > 0:11:16they got big ambitions and they want to make this
0:11:16 > 0:11:19the biggest football club in the world by the year of the pig.
0:11:19 > 0:11:24And Chairman Mao's absolutely convinced it's going to be a very successful few years ahead
0:11:24 > 0:11:27and he should know, he made his money selling fortune cookies.
0:11:27 > 0:11:31What about the chairman's son? He's gone straight into the first team
0:11:31 > 0:11:33and yet I'm told that's against the manager's wishes?
0:11:33 > 0:11:35No, absolutely not.
0:11:35 > 0:11:39Er, the chairman's son's here on merit and he's in the team on footballing abilities alone.
0:11:39 > 0:11:42Erm, he certainly gives us something different.
0:11:42 > 0:11:45Name another Premier League team with a winger in a wheelchair.
0:11:45 > 0:11:49Come on, Jason, don't you think the large number of Chinese signings
0:11:49 > 0:11:53made by the chairman is just a ploy to appeal to the Asian market?
0:11:53 > 0:11:54No.
0:11:54 > 0:11:58Eeerm, I know he's brought in, I think, 24 Chinese lads,
0:11:58 > 0:12:01but most of them are here to make the kit and balls.
0:12:01 > 0:12:04Finally then, Jason, the deal is signed
0:12:04 > 0:12:09so do you think this is going to put a stop to all the talk that you're going to Madrid?
0:12:09 > 0:12:12Erm, I'm getting sick and tired of these Madrid rumours.
0:12:12 > 0:12:16Erm, obviously it's flattering to be linked to a big club like Real Madrid,
0:12:16 > 0:12:20you know, a massive club, possibly the biggest football club in the world,
0:12:20 > 0:12:24incredible tradition, erm, magnificent history.
0:12:24 > 0:12:28I supported them as a lad and it would be a dream come true to put on that famous white shirt
0:12:28 > 0:12:31and play in front of the Madridistas, the greatest fans on earth.
0:12:33 > 0:12:36(GARBLED SPANISH)
0:12:36 > 0:12:39Live and die for Real Madrid.
0:12:39 > 0:12:43(GARBLED SPANISH)
0:12:43 > 0:12:47It would be an honour to serve the good people of Madrid.
0:12:49 > 0:12:52(GARBLED SPANISH)
0:12:52 > 0:12:56My heart belongs to you, Madrid, and I love you.
0:12:58 > 0:13:01I just hope that puts a stop to them rumours.
0:13:01 > 0:13:04Jason, thanks for coming on 5 Live Sport.
0:13:11 > 0:13:14Oi, is everyone here having a good summer?
0:13:14 > 0:13:15AUDIENCE: Yeah!
0:13:15 > 0:13:18Yeah! Summer's the best time of year, innit?
0:13:18 > 0:13:20The girls wear very, very little.
0:13:20 > 0:13:22I was going along the other day,
0:13:22 > 0:13:27I see this girl, I could not work out what she had on, man,
0:13:27 > 0:13:31whether it was like a tiny little skirt or just a massive muff.
0:13:32 > 0:13:37Innit? So I've just like slammed on the brakes, right, pull over,
0:13:37 > 0:13:40I was like, "You all right, treacle?
0:13:40 > 0:13:46"Fancy coming for a ride on my mountain bike?"
0:13:46 > 0:13:49Definitely would have pulled her, but my chain fell off.
0:13:51 > 0:13:56My little boy loves the summer. I took him to Euro Disney, yeah,
0:13:56 > 0:14:00it's only a two-hour flight. I never knew America was that close.
0:14:00 > 0:14:04Oi, right, travelling with a seven-year-old on a plane, has anyone done that?
0:14:04 > 0:14:08- Yeah.- Ain't it a night? Sweetie pie, what happened with you, baby?
0:14:08 > 0:14:13- We sat in first class.- You sat in first class? All right, fuck off.
0:14:13 > 0:14:16Innit? Poor you, innit?
0:14:16 > 0:14:19Sat in first class, go on, let's hear your sob story.
0:14:19 > 0:14:24He put chocolate in my seat and I fell asleep and it melted all in my crack.
0:14:28 > 0:14:30Am I hearing this right or...?
0:14:32 > 0:14:34Well, I was really hot and so...
0:14:35 > 0:14:40- How olds' your kid? - No, it was not my kid... Oh, no, it was my friend's son.
0:14:40 > 0:14:43Have you understood any of the show so far?
0:14:43 > 0:14:47My seven-year-old just went hyper, it was a nightmare.
0:14:47 > 0:14:51I had to confiscate his vodka Red Bull in the end.
0:14:52 > 0:14:57And we's hired the car, right, when we was out there to get from the airport to the hotel.
0:14:57 > 0:15:03Oh, my gosh, the French is the most mental drivers in the world, innit?
0:15:03 > 0:15:09You know when you're vexed in the UK, right, and you're like on the road, you're like, "wanker!"
0:15:09 > 0:15:12Innit? That's what you do, "wanker!"
0:15:12 > 0:15:16Innit? "Wanker!" Sweetie pie, you more of a wanker...
0:15:25 > 0:15:27Close that mouth, babe.
0:15:28 > 0:15:33They was all going mental over there, right, and we weren't even going that quick
0:15:33 > 0:15:35and you know the French is like a foreign place
0:15:35 > 0:15:39so they got their own different ways of doing things, right?
0:15:39 > 0:15:42Cos you know out in this country you go like that, "wanker!"
0:15:42 > 0:15:46In France, they don't have the fist closed, they have it open like that.
0:15:46 > 0:15:49So it's not that, it's that...
0:15:49 > 0:15:51Innit? Not that, that.
0:15:51 > 0:15:57That's interesting, innit? And they don't say wanker, French word for it is "wrong side."
0:15:59 > 0:16:01Wrong side. Fuck off!
0:16:10 > 0:16:14- Oi, has we got any French people in the house tonight?- Yeah.
0:16:14 > 0:16:19Yes, my man over there, I'm going to talk to my French man.
0:16:19 > 0:16:24You, my man, teach us, teach us some French, geez, teach us some French.
0:16:24 > 0:16:26Who here wants to learn a bit of French?
0:16:26 > 0:16:31- Yeah.- You go to France, what we want to do, order a beer. What's the French for beer?
0:16:31 > 0:16:34- Bier.- Bier.
0:16:34 > 0:16:36Very similar, yeah.
0:16:36 > 0:16:38French for beer is bier.
0:16:38 > 0:16:42I think he's trying to make me look like an idiot.
0:16:42 > 0:16:47What about, um, a cigarette? I want a cigarette with my beer, French for cigarette.
0:16:47 > 0:16:49- Cigarette.- Cigarette.
0:16:49 > 0:16:53Beer, cigarette, I don't fucking believe it.
0:16:53 > 0:16:56- Football.- Football.
0:16:56 > 0:16:57Oh, fuck off.
0:17:02 > 0:17:04Either he's lying or I'm fluent.
0:17:07 > 0:17:11- Who here has been to Euro Disney? Hands up.- Yeah.
0:17:11 > 0:17:13You have, you legend, you have a good time?
0:17:13 > 0:17:16- Yeah.- Yeah, grow up.
0:17:18 > 0:17:21No, I love Euro Disney, it's a lot better than the UK version, innit?
0:17:21 > 0:17:23Poundland.
0:17:23 > 0:17:27What about other people? Anyone else been to Euro Disney?
0:17:27 > 0:17:32- My man at the back, you loving it, oh, what was your favourite ride, fella?- Probably Space Mountain.
0:17:32 > 0:17:35Space Mountain, innit? Space Mountain's the best.
0:17:35 > 0:17:38The worst thing was my little boy was just too small to go on it.
0:17:38 > 0:17:42You know they have them height restrictions and he was like that much off it,
0:17:42 > 0:17:46and the poor thing had been looking forward to going on Space Mountain for about a month
0:17:46 > 0:17:51and he just stood by the height restriction crying and crying and crying and crying and crying.
0:17:51 > 0:17:55I must have went on that ride about ten times.
0:17:56 > 0:18:02I even got one of them photos you get afterwards of him crying by the height restriction.
0:18:03 > 0:18:06The thing about Euro Disney, it's good for kids and adults.
0:18:06 > 0:18:09For the kids they got the characters walking around,
0:18:09 > 0:18:12Buzz Lightyear and Mickey Mouse and Donald Duck.
0:18:12 > 0:18:16For the adults, we got Cinderella, yes.
0:18:16 > 0:18:21The Little Mermaid, hm, hm, hm, would you with the Little Mermaid?
0:18:21 > 0:18:25Yeah, I would with the Little Mermaid.
0:18:25 > 0:18:28I wouldn't know how with a mermaid but I'd give her a go.
0:18:28 > 0:18:33Yeah, and you had Snow White, oh, my gosh, yeah, would you bang Snow White?
0:18:33 > 0:18:37- Yeah.- Yeah, fuck it, she's asleep.
0:18:44 > 0:18:51Oi, enough from me, now it's time for Life Begins with Dr Bob.
0:18:54 > 0:18:59Every second of every minute of every day,
0:18:59 > 0:19:02a new baby is born.
0:19:02 > 0:19:03(SHE SCREAMS)
0:19:03 > 0:19:06Stop screaming, it's not going to make things better!
0:19:08 > 0:19:13We put cameras into the wards of one of the busiest maternity hospitals in the country.
0:19:13 > 0:19:16Show me the baby.
0:19:16 > 0:19:19Following Dr Bob
0:19:19 > 0:19:21and his team of midwives.
0:19:21 > 0:19:23I've lost my pen.
0:19:23 > 0:19:25It's a baby.
0:19:32 > 0:19:40Daaaaah...
0:19:50 > 0:19:55Stop! Well done, dear, all is progressing nicely.
0:19:55 > 0:19:59I wonder if you wouldn't mind me bringing a couple of my medical students in,
0:19:59 > 0:20:03- it's the only way they going to learn.- Sorry, I'd just like some peace and quiet.
0:20:03 > 0:20:07Thank you, dear. (SHOUTING) In you come, students!
0:20:11 > 0:20:15Close the door behind, patient waiting, good.
0:20:15 > 0:20:22Now, students, why do we think Mrs Sanderson is moaning?
0:20:22 > 0:20:25- Cos she's in pain? - Cos she's in pain, yes, good.
0:20:25 > 0:20:29So, students, what are we going to give her?
0:20:29 > 0:20:33- Gas and air?- Gas and air, yes, off you go and give her some.
0:20:36 > 0:20:39- Ask her if that's better? - Is that better, Mrs Sanderson?
0:20:39 > 0:20:42(HIGH-PITCHED) No, that's not better at all.
0:20:42 > 0:20:44Sophie, do you realise what you've done?
0:20:44 > 0:20:49Sophie has given her the helium canister that I brought in
0:20:49 > 0:20:53for tonight's vicars and tarts party at the Students' Union. Who's going?
0:20:53 > 0:20:55(THEY CHEER)
0:20:55 > 0:20:58(HIGHPITCHED) Good, I'll see you all there.
0:20:59 > 0:21:02Hello, what's your name?
0:21:02 > 0:21:04Hello, everyone, I'm Dr Bob.
0:21:04 > 0:21:07It's funny!
0:21:09 > 0:21:14- ALL: Push, push, push, push, push, push, push.- I can't do it!
0:21:14 > 0:21:18More encouragement, students. We love you, Mrs Sanderson.
0:21:20 > 0:21:24# We love you, Mrs Sanderson Push, push
0:21:24 > 0:21:26# We love you Mrs Sanderson, we do
0:21:26 > 0:21:31# Oh, Mrs Sanderson, we love you, hooray! #
0:21:34 > 0:21:36Yes! It's a boy!
0:21:36 > 0:21:40# For he's a jolly good fellow For he's a jolly good fellow
0:21:40 > 0:21:44# For he's a jolly good fellow
0:21:44 > 0:21:46# And so say all of us
0:21:46 > 0:21:50# And so say all of us And say so all of us. #
0:21:50 > 0:21:54Who's got Mrs Sanderson's baby?
0:21:54 > 0:21:56Here's your baby.
0:21:56 > 0:22:03It's just blanket! I always do that joke for the students.
0:22:03 > 0:22:05Here's your baby.
0:22:05 > 0:22:10It's the same joke as before, but less funny.
0:22:10 > 0:22:12Vicars and tarts party.
0:22:12 > 0:22:16- Yeah!- Party, party, party.
0:22:16 > 0:22:21If you want to come along tonight, it's £3 on the door and a free shot before 7.30.
0:22:21 > 0:22:25I'll probably see you there.
0:22:25 > 0:22:28(HIGH-PITCHED) I'm Dr Bob. Still funny.
0:22:32 > 0:22:34Have you thought about your birth plan?
0:22:34 > 0:22:38Um, yeah and I'm really quite keen to have an epidural.
0:22:38 > 0:22:41Have you considered a water birth?
0:22:41 > 0:22:43Is that better for the baby?
0:22:43 > 0:22:49Not really, no, it's just you have the stinkiest pookie I've ever come across.
0:22:52 > 0:22:53APPLAUSE
0:22:55 > 0:22:59Hello, Omelette, do you know what it's time for?
0:22:59 > 0:23:01You know I'm seeing a therapist cos of this?
0:23:01 > 0:23:04I couldn't care less, it's your peer pressure challenge.
0:23:08 > 0:23:10Omelette's peer pressure challenge.
0:23:15 > 0:23:20Omelette, on this wheel is three things and at the end of the show you has to do one of them.
0:23:20 > 0:23:28Do you fancy...drinking a milkshake from your stinky shoe?
0:23:28 > 0:23:30No, thanks.
0:23:30 > 0:23:36Is you up for being turned into a human pinata?
0:23:38 > 0:23:39Not really.
0:23:39 > 0:23:44How's about having some colonic irrigation?
0:23:46 > 0:23:48Definitely not.
0:23:48 > 0:23:51Well, youse is going to have to do one of them,
0:23:51 > 0:23:54cos it's Omelette's peer pressure challenge.
0:23:54 > 0:23:55Spin that wheel.
0:24:05 > 0:24:08Yes!
0:24:10 > 0:24:15- Omelette, is you going to get turned into a human pinata?- No, I'm not.
0:24:15 > 0:24:20Well, we'll see about that. Oi, everyone, let's pressure him into it.
0:24:20 > 0:24:24Do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it.
0:24:24 > 0:24:28Do it, do it, do it, do it, do it, do it.
0:24:31 > 0:24:34- You going to do it now? - Yeah, all right.
0:24:34 > 0:24:35CHEERING
0:24:37 > 0:24:41We've peer pressured him into it. Off you go and get ready, my man.
0:24:41 > 0:24:46Quality! People, it's time for me Auntie Janet's tips.
0:24:50 > 0:24:54An intimate session doesn't always have to end in full blown sex.
0:24:54 > 0:24:59For something that's different but can be just as fun, why not try watching each other masturbate?
0:25:01 > 0:25:03Quality!
0:25:03 > 0:25:09That, people, is all we've got time for. Oh, no.
0:25:09 > 0:25:12But before we go, it's time to reveal this week's audience bellend.
0:25:37 > 0:25:40What a perfect bellend.
0:25:41 > 0:25:45Oi, there's just one more thing to come, it's my nan's singing!
0:25:47 > 0:25:49Come on down, Nan.
0:25:49 > 0:25:54Thank youse for watching, thank youse for coming.
0:25:56 > 0:25:58Hello, Nan.
0:25:58 > 0:26:00What is youse singing for us tonight, Nan?
0:26:00 > 0:26:04Lee, tonight I'm asking the UK, Who Let The Dogs Out?
0:26:04 > 0:26:08Yeeeees! Take it away, Nan.
0:26:08 > 0:26:11# Who let the dogs out? Who? Who? Who? Who?
0:26:11 > 0:26:15# Who let the dogs out? Who? Who? Who? Who?
0:26:15 > 0:26:19# Who let the dogs out? Who? Who? Who? Who?
0:26:19 > 0:26:22# Who let the dogs out? Who? Who? Who? Who?
0:26:22 > 0:26:24# The party was nice, the party was jumpin'
0:26:24 > 0:26:29# Yippee-aye-oh Everybody's having a ball
0:26:29 > 0:26:31# Yippee-aye-oh
0:26:31 > 0:26:34I tell the fellas calling the... Yippee-aye-oh
0:26:34 > 0:26:38# And the girls report to the call
0:26:38 > 0:26:41# Who let the dogs out? Who? Who? Who? Who?
0:26:41 > 0:26:45# Who let the dogs out? Who? Who? Who? Who?
0:26:45 > 0:26:48# Who let the dogs out? Who? Who? Who? Who?
0:26:48 > 0:26:51# Who let the dogs out? Who? Who? Who? Who?
0:26:51 > 0:26:56# Who let the dogs out? Who? Who? Who? Who?
0:26:56 > 0:26:59# Who let the dogs out? Who? Who? Who? Who? #
0:26:59 > 0:27:01Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd
0:27:01 > 0:27:04Email subtitling@bbc.co.uk