0:00:02 > 0:00:06This programme contains very strong language.
0:00:06 > 0:00:12- You've contracted a rare and tedious reverse-ageing condition. - Oh, dear. No, that IS a blow.
0:00:12 > 0:00:13Is there anything I can do?
0:00:13 > 0:00:16Nothing. Absolutely nothing.
0:00:16 > 0:00:17Although...
0:00:17 > 0:00:20there IS an antidote.
0:00:20 > 0:00:22Right.
0:00:22 > 0:00:25And where can I get hold of this so-called antidote?
0:00:25 > 0:00:27Superdrug? Boots?
0:00:27 > 0:00:29Afraid it's not quite as easy as that.
0:00:29 > 0:00:33And I'll tell you for why. Because it's Easter Monday
0:00:33 > 0:00:36and none of chemists are open...
0:00:36 > 0:00:38Cut!
0:00:38 > 0:00:39Going again.
0:00:39 > 0:00:42OK, guys. That was great, just felt a bit flat.
0:00:42 > 0:00:44Just need to go quicker, yeah? Pace, pace, pace.
0:00:44 > 0:00:45Nelson?
0:00:45 > 0:00:49I am listening. I'm just trying to refocus.
0:00:51 > 0:00:53Hello, Adam, how may I help you?
0:00:53 > 0:00:57Also, it's more like "Benjamin Button!" Not "Benjamin Button."
0:00:57 > 0:00:58"Benjamin Button!" Yeah?
0:01:00 > 0:01:02Unbelievable. See that?
0:01:02 > 0:01:04Line-readings he's giving me now.
0:01:04 > 0:01:05Dick.
0:01:05 > 0:01:08The reason that we're actually being so quiet
0:01:08 > 0:01:10is cos we're on a soundstage in East London.
0:01:10 > 0:01:13Nelson's filming a scene behind us right now.
0:01:13 > 0:01:17So, yeah, welcome. Welcome to this celebratory look-back
0:01:17 > 0:01:21at BBC3's critically-acclaimed cult smash-hit, Mongrels.
0:01:21 > 0:01:25We're actually gonna see if we can get a word with Nelson now.
0:01:25 > 0:01:31Can someone please get Miquita fucking Oliver off my fucking set, please?!
0:01:31 > 0:01:32Thank you!
0:01:34 > 0:01:36Maybe we'll try him later.
0:01:36 > 0:01:38And...action.
0:01:47 > 0:01:52Take an urban fox, an Afghan hound, a stray cat, a loudmouth pigeon,
0:01:52 > 0:01:56and a sexually violent predator named Vince,
0:01:56 > 0:02:02put them in a pub garden and you get a 24-carat nugget of pure TV gold.
0:02:02 > 0:02:08Ladies, gentlemen, animals, welcome to our salute to Mongrels.
0:02:20 > 0:02:22BOTH SCREAM
0:02:29 > 0:02:31BLEEP dust!
0:02:31 > 0:02:35Our Mongrels celebration kicks off, where else,
0:02:35 > 0:02:37but with the immortal Nelson.
0:02:37 > 0:02:41Over the course of 16 unforgettable episodes, he's established himself
0:02:41 > 0:02:45as an iconic comedy character, on a par with David Brent.
0:02:45 > 0:02:47OK, I'm not saying that.
0:02:47 > 0:02:52Over the course of 16 unforgettable episodes, he's established himself
0:02:52 > 0:02:57as an iconic comedy character on a par with Andy Millman from Extras.
0:02:57 > 0:03:00# I want to break free
0:03:01 > 0:03:05# I want to break free
0:03:05 > 0:03:07# I want to break free... #
0:03:07 > 0:03:12Bit of a pickle. The three-wheeler's broken down. We're on our way to a fancy dress party...
0:03:12 > 0:03:15It's our island, we could do anything we want.
0:03:15 > 0:03:18# I've got to break free... #
0:03:18 > 0:03:19Nelson?
0:03:19 > 0:03:20CANNED LAUGHTER
0:03:20 > 0:03:22SCREAMS
0:03:22 > 0:03:24This is Casino Royale.
0:03:24 > 0:03:26Which is the bit from Quantum of Solace?
0:03:26 > 0:03:27Champing. Champing.
0:03:27 > 0:03:31Hi, I'm Nelson. I'm actually kind of a special fox.
0:03:31 > 0:03:35So, Nelson. Tell us how you came to be involved in the show.
0:03:35 > 0:03:39Well, it WAS competitive getting the part. Very.
0:03:39 > 0:03:42Audition after audition after audition.
0:03:42 > 0:03:46They heard everyone for the lead role. And I mean everyone.
0:03:46 > 0:03:49I'm actually kind of a special fox.
0:03:49 > 0:03:53For e.g. I'm a bloody good after dinner speaker.
0:03:53 > 0:03:57Like, er, once I was going through, Kerry Katona's, er, bottle bin.
0:03:57 > 0:03:59I say 'bottle bin',
0:03:59 > 0:04:02more like 'bottle bank'!
0:04:02 > 0:04:03Ha-ha.
0:04:03 > 0:04:05No, but seriously, folks...
0:04:05 > 0:04:07Anyway, try and soldier on here,
0:04:07 > 0:04:11this other time, I was hanging out by Jimmy Carr's recycling bin.
0:04:11 > 0:04:15Or, to give it's proper name, Michael McIntyre.
0:04:15 > 0:04:18No, come on, seriously...
0:04:18 > 0:04:20I'm actually kind of a special fox.
0:04:20 > 0:04:24For example, I'm a bloody good after dinner speaker.
0:04:24 > 0:04:28You know, like, once I was going through Kerry Katona's bottle bin...
0:04:28 > 0:04:29Yep. OK. Thank you, Will.
0:04:29 > 0:04:34- I think that's... You can... - Let me go again, I'm just getting into it, it's just the accent.
0:04:34 > 0:04:36- It's a bit... - We don't need to hear anymore.
0:04:36 > 0:04:41And, yeah, the very next day, my agent phoned.
0:04:41 > 0:04:42I hadn't got it.
0:04:42 > 0:04:44A circle-stroke?
0:04:44 > 0:04:47I'm stroking you, you're stroking me!
0:04:47 > 0:04:49- Fine, I'll try it. But you're wearing protection.- Oh!
0:04:49 > 0:04:51But I won't feel anything.
0:04:51 > 0:04:54I don't care. Now, just stroke me from behind.
0:04:54 > 0:04:55We'll work on to my tummy.
0:04:55 > 0:04:58Going anywhere nice on holidays?
0:04:58 > 0:05:00Yeah, well, me and a couple of the guys,
0:05:00 > 0:05:04from the bins near ASDA, we're talking about, erm...
0:05:04 > 0:05:07a jigsawing holiday, but the thing is, you know,
0:05:07 > 0:05:10with the way the euro is... I have to stop, he's doing my head in.
0:05:10 > 0:05:12The cat's hands are itching like fuck!
0:05:16 > 0:05:17What's the matter with him?
0:05:17 > 0:05:22Unfortunately, things didn't quite work out for Will at the Beeb.
0:05:22 > 0:05:26Long story short, he urinated in Alan Yentob's private lift.
0:05:26 > 0:05:28So my agent phoned and I was like, "Eric Stoltz!
0:05:28 > 0:05:32"Of course I can be drafted into the lead role at the last minute!"
0:05:32 > 0:05:34Which brings us nicely on to your little catchphrases.
0:05:34 > 0:05:36Catchphrases?
0:05:37 > 0:05:41Lesley Grantham! I killed a man!
0:05:41 > 0:05:44Russell Howard! What in the name of Marty Feldman happened to your eyes?
0:05:44 > 0:05:46Sir Norman Foster!
0:05:46 > 0:05:50Building work? Pete Townshend, what was I thinking? Jordy Chandler!
0:05:50 > 0:05:53Morten Harket! Julian Lloyd Webber!
0:05:53 > 0:05:56Magic Johnson, I think I've got rabies! Mark Fowler!
0:05:56 > 0:06:01I don't have rabies. Rory McGrath! Gail Emms! Neil and Christine Hamilton!
0:06:01 > 0:06:07Helen Mirren! George Ava! Sam Murnaghan! Horne and Corden!
0:06:07 > 0:06:10Sir Robert Winston! Sir Anthony Hopkins! Harvey Keitel!
0:06:10 > 0:06:15Captain Chesley Burnett "Sully" Sullenburg III! I can't do that!
0:06:16 > 0:06:18Oh, those. Yeah, it's just something I do.
0:06:18 > 0:06:21But, of course, there's more to Mongrels than that.
0:06:21 > 0:06:25After all, Nelson would be nothing without his Marion.
0:06:26 > 0:06:29Hello, madam. I'm a gas man,
0:06:29 > 0:06:32as you can clearly see from my official hat.
0:06:32 > 0:06:33MARION GRUNTS
0:06:33 > 0:06:34Marion.
0:06:34 > 0:06:36Marion. Marion.
0:06:36 > 0:06:37Marion. Marion.
0:06:37 > 0:06:39Marion.
0:06:39 > 0:06:40Marion.
0:06:40 > 0:06:42I, daughter of Dracula!
0:06:42 > 0:06:46Apparently, she wasn't a vampire, just had these two pointy teeth.
0:06:46 > 0:06:49SLOWLY LETS OUT SCREAM
0:06:49 > 0:06:50Marion, Marion.
0:06:50 > 0:06:53Marion. Marion.
0:06:53 > 0:06:55I knew that. (I didn't know that.)
0:06:55 > 0:07:01So I'm guessing now would be too late to introduce a safe word?
0:07:01 > 0:07:03Marion. Marion.
0:07:03 > 0:07:04Marion.
0:07:04 > 0:07:08Nelson, I've just interfered with space-time continuum,
0:07:08 > 0:07:10will you travel back to 1985 with me?
0:07:10 > 0:07:13Thanks to this misfortunate sequence of events,
0:07:13 > 0:07:16I have at last come to appreciate the true meaning of irony.
0:07:16 > 0:07:20I am literally no closer to appreciating the true meaning of irony.
0:07:20 > 0:07:24I'll see the sun set over those bins if it's the last thing... Marion.
0:07:26 > 0:07:31Well, as I'm sure you're aware, I am a veteran of the stage.
0:07:31 > 0:07:35When I was cast in the lead role as Marion,
0:07:35 > 0:07:39I'd actually just come off the back of three years' touring
0:07:39 > 0:07:42with the Royal Shakespeare Company.
0:07:42 > 0:07:48To be or not to be, that is the question.
0:07:48 > 0:07:49That is NOT the question.
0:07:49 > 0:07:52Well, it is a question, but there are others.
0:07:52 > 0:07:54Like, when's the interval?
0:07:54 > 0:07:58Oh, man, I could eat the crap out of a Magnum.
0:07:58 > 0:07:59It was great.
0:07:59 > 0:08:02It meant I'd learnt my craft properly
0:08:02 > 0:08:04BEFORE I made it onto the TV.
0:08:04 > 0:08:08Unlike, say, the rest of the cast!
0:08:08 > 0:08:10Not that that matters! Ha-ha.
0:08:10 > 0:08:12There is a rumour that you're bitter
0:08:12 > 0:08:15that the other animals came onto the show as their first gig,
0:08:15 > 0:08:19whereas you'd spent your entire life touring regional theatres.
0:08:19 > 0:08:23This! Always this! I'd like to know who started all this talk.
0:08:23 > 0:08:26I mean, wha...what is it even based on?
0:08:26 > 0:08:28Your DVD commentary.
0:08:28 > 0:08:29I was drunk!
0:08:29 > 0:08:33- The thing I find most amazing... - 'God, he's crap.
0:08:33 > 0:08:36'Ha! Look at him. He can't act for shit.
0:08:36 > 0:08:39'"I'm Nelson, I talk like this.
0:08:39 > 0:08:42'"Paul Whitehouse, I've got a catchphrase!"
0:08:42 > 0:08:46'Because catchphrase comedy is so hot right now(!)
0:08:46 > 0:08:48'Ugh, look at her.
0:08:48 > 0:08:53'Jesus! She gives you nothing, you know? Nothing to play off.
0:08:53 > 0:08:57'At least Trevor Eve has the talent to back up being such a shithead.
0:08:57 > 0:08:59'Oh, here she comes.
0:08:59 > 0:09:02'Wonder what kind of performance she's going to give THIS week.
0:09:02 > 0:09:06'Oh, joy, she's going to shout every line like this
0:09:06 > 0:09:10'because apparently when you shout, you're acting!
0:09:10 > 0:09:14'Oh... can Marion get some more Malibu in here, please?
0:09:14 > 0:09:15'Oy!'
0:09:15 > 0:09:20Anyway, that's all behind us now. We're friends again.
0:09:20 > 0:09:22Marion? Ha-ha-ha!
0:09:22 > 0:09:23No, we don't socialise.
0:09:23 > 0:09:27Wouldn't say we're friends...exactly.
0:09:27 > 0:09:29He's a cock.
0:09:29 > 0:09:30What? He is!
0:09:30 > 0:09:33One character who IS universally loved,
0:09:33 > 0:09:36both on and off screens, is the adorable Destiny.
0:09:36 > 0:09:40In many ways, the First Lady of Mongrels.
0:09:40 > 0:09:43Who's that? Is it me, is it me?
0:09:43 > 0:09:46- Oi!- Oi!- Oi!- Oi!- Oi!
0:09:46 > 0:09:47Whore!
0:09:47 > 0:09:49Whore! Whore!
0:09:49 > 0:09:51# I'm a bitch
0:09:51 > 0:09:54# I'm a lover, I'm a child, I'm a mother... #
0:09:54 > 0:09:56Because I'm worming.
0:09:56 > 0:09:58What about me? What about my needs?
0:09:58 > 0:10:01I do sit, stay, beg, left paw, right paw, heel,
0:10:01 > 0:10:02wiggle ears - that's double.
0:10:02 > 0:10:05SHOUTS UNINTELLIGIBLY
0:10:05 > 0:10:08# Wouldn't want it any other way
0:10:09 > 0:10:12# Ooh-ooh... #
0:10:12 > 0:10:13Shut up!
0:10:13 > 0:10:17And while Destiny's on-screen relationships have captured
0:10:17 > 0:10:21the hearts of audiences worldwide, more recently it's been talk
0:10:21 > 0:10:25of her behind-the-scenes romance that's really got people talking.
0:10:25 > 0:10:27Oh, that! Yeah.
0:10:27 > 0:10:31Well, there's definitely something going on in real life.
0:10:31 > 0:10:33It's obvious, man. The way they fight on screen.
0:10:33 > 0:10:36There's all kinds of tensions under the surface.
0:10:36 > 0:10:38From what I can gather, he really likes her,
0:10:38 > 0:10:40yeah, but she just don't feel the same way.
0:10:40 > 0:10:45- It's Christine Bleakley and that bulldog-faced- BLEEP- from Daybreak all over again.
0:10:45 > 0:10:47That's how I'm reading it anyways.
0:10:47 > 0:10:50I wouldn't know. You'd have to ask them about that.
0:10:51 > 0:10:53I don't understand the question.
0:10:53 > 0:10:56Let me put it more bluntly. Is there anything going on between you?
0:10:56 > 0:11:01What?! No! God! No.
0:11:01 > 0:11:03No way. We're just mates. Aren't we, Gary?
0:11:03 > 0:11:05Yep. Uh-huh.
0:11:06 > 0:11:11- Nelson, tell us about your relationship with Destiny.- Well,
0:11:11 > 0:11:14obviously, it's at the very centre of show.
0:11:14 > 0:11:18And I think that's because there's a palpable sexual tension
0:11:18 > 0:11:20between us - as performers.
0:11:26 > 0:11:31Well, what are we waiting for? Let's go start the rest of our lives!
0:11:31 > 0:11:33I love ya! And I have always...
0:11:33 > 0:11:39Meant to say earlier, could you address all flirty/creepiness at the other me from now on?
0:11:39 > 0:11:41- Kiss me.- You know the rules - not on the mouth.
0:11:41 > 0:11:44Nelson, I am not single, you clown's foreskin!
0:11:44 > 0:11:48You pretended you'd been sexually assaulted just so you'd get off walkies!
0:11:48 > 0:11:53Yeah. This ends now. The end of us.
0:11:53 > 0:11:58Not that there ever was or will be an us.
0:11:58 > 0:12:01Never. Genuinely never.
0:12:01 > 0:12:03Never.
0:12:03 > 0:12:06Never. Never.
0:12:06 > 0:12:08See, the reason it works so well
0:12:08 > 0:12:10is because the audience believe in us as a couple.
0:12:10 > 0:12:12They're rooting for us.
0:12:12 > 0:12:16It doesn't work. The whole will-they-won't-they thing. Never has.
0:12:16 > 0:12:19And the reason the audience don't care about it is
0:12:19 > 0:12:22because there is NO possible way anyone would ever buy
0:12:22 > 0:12:24that my character could go out with his.
0:12:24 > 0:12:28It's not rocket science. You put a handsome guy with a good-looking girl,
0:12:28 > 0:12:30people are going to want to see them together.
0:12:30 > 0:12:34Don't get me wrong, I like him as an actor, great guy, yeah.
0:12:34 > 0:12:40I'm sure there are loads of girls out there who'd just love to have Nelson as their asexual best friend.
0:12:40 > 0:12:43But be serious for a second. Me? And him?
0:12:43 > 0:12:48Why would ANYONE ever believe, even for a SINGLE second,
0:12:48 > 0:12:51that I'd EVER contemplate going out..
0:12:51 > 0:12:54Sorry. I CAN hear you.
0:12:54 > 0:12:56Yeah. Sorry.
0:12:56 > 0:12:59(I'll tell you about it later.)
0:12:59 > 0:13:02Then there's Kali. The fourth member of the gang.
0:13:02 > 0:13:05How would you describe your character?
0:13:05 > 0:13:07Me? I'm the brainy one, innit.
0:13:07 > 0:13:09Oi though, Marion, how much that tyre cost?
0:13:09 > 0:13:12Well, Kali, I believe it retails in the region of two...
0:13:12 > 0:13:16Does that take into account 'inflation?' Bo! Brap-brap-brap!
0:13:16 > 0:13:22Disrespect! Bo! Get in! Zing! One-nil Kali! Bull's-eye!
0:13:22 > 0:13:24Owned! Gutted! Served! Played!
0:13:24 > 0:13:27Boom-shack-a-lack-a-lack-a-lack-a!
0:13:27 > 0:13:31Back of the net! Goal! Early bath! Relegated!
0:13:31 > 0:13:33Brap-brap-brap! Jokes! Innit though!
0:13:33 > 0:13:38Bitch! Slap! You got schooled, beeyatch!
0:13:38 > 0:13:39OK, I'm done.
0:13:39 > 0:13:43Every episode of Mongrels features a musical number.
0:13:43 > 0:13:45Tell us a little something about the songs.
0:13:45 > 0:13:48No. I refuse.
0:13:48 > 0:13:51I refuse to be your linking device just so you can
0:13:51 > 0:13:55get into a crappy montage of old songs from the last two series.
0:13:55 > 0:13:57I think it's lazy, frankly.
0:13:57 > 0:14:01I think clips shows are the last refuge of the scoundrel.
0:14:01 > 0:14:03They are beneath contempt.
0:14:03 > 0:14:08So, no, I would not like to say a little something about the songs!
0:14:08 > 0:14:10Run VT.
0:14:10 > 0:14:13# If you're uncomfortable with coming out
0:14:13 > 0:14:16# Just listen to what I saysbian
0:14:16 > 0:14:19# Whatever anyone thinks of gays
0:14:19 > 0:14:21# Everyone loves a lesbian... #
0:14:21 > 0:14:25# Could you even name one of his songs?
0:14:27 > 0:14:33# The self-important little diva
0:14:33 > 0:14:36# Gonna take a pick-axe to his pretty face
0:14:38 > 0:14:43# I'm gonna murder Justin Bieber... #
0:14:43 > 0:14:46# Breaking up is such a faff
0:14:46 > 0:14:48# I can't stand awkward goodbyes
0:14:48 > 0:14:51# Breaking up is such a faff
0:14:51 > 0:14:55# I'll just sweat it out until she dies... #
0:14:55 > 0:14:59# One day you're a paedo
0:14:59 > 0:15:03# And you're my jailbait
0:15:03 > 0:15:07# Next day you're my sweetheart
0:15:07 > 0:15:12# And it's suddenly legal to mate... #
0:15:12 > 0:15:15# Ugly women are beautiful too
0:15:15 > 0:15:19# They're always sweet and trusting, even though they look disgusting
0:15:19 > 0:15:23# Ugly women are beautiful too... #
0:15:23 > 0:15:27# No-one's been stabbed here since Friday
0:15:27 > 0:15:29# No-one's been strangled or maimed
0:15:29 > 0:15:33# No-one's been stabbed here since Friday
0:15:33 > 0:15:36# And you'll just love our new needle exchange. #
0:15:36 > 0:15:37Key change!
0:15:44 > 0:15:47# He anally invaded me as a publicity stunt
0:15:47 > 0:15:50# I think we all agree
0:15:50 > 0:15:52# He is a massive
0:15:52 > 0:15:57# BLEEP. #
0:15:57 > 0:15:59I'm a BLEEP.
0:15:59 > 0:16:01Bitch!
0:16:01 > 0:16:03Marion, how would you say
0:16:03 > 0:16:08that you've handled the runaway success of Mongrels?
0:16:08 > 0:16:12Well, I don't think of any of us knew the show was going to be so huge.
0:16:12 > 0:16:15We're now watched in something like 30 territories.
0:16:15 > 0:16:18Belarus, Turkey, Uganda...
0:16:18 > 0:16:22Translated into Spanish, Italian, French. And ancient Latin.
0:16:22 > 0:16:24For some reason.
0:16:24 > 0:16:30Vultus er, is est forsit iens egredior totus nefas quod ut tamen,
0:16:30 > 0:16:32haud permissum mihi perago,
0:16:32 > 0:16:36animadverto ego reputo vos es versus plaga
0:16:36 > 0:16:41quod ego cannot subsisto reputo super vos quod quis abyssus.
0:16:41 > 0:16:44Sic usquam, etiam Vos can narro.
0:16:44 > 0:16:46Vos operor animadverto ego sum a puella.
0:16:46 > 0:16:50Oh meus deus haud! Ego did non animadverto ut!
0:16:50 > 0:16:51Sic etiam, etiam,
0:16:51 > 0:16:55basic fortuitus lesbianism vox illic.
0:16:55 > 0:16:58Hey accidit. Vos teneo, formo es sic androgynous
0:16:58 > 0:17:00illa dies plus nos members of bird prosapia,
0:17:00 > 0:17:04- haud promptus genitor! - Etiam quod vere does non succurro.
0:17:04 > 0:17:08Audio, ego teneo aliquantulus bird balineum inter angulus.
0:17:08 > 0:17:11Operor vos somnium a imbibo?
0:17:11 > 0:17:13- Iustus ut amicitia? - Certus. Amicitia.
0:17:13 > 0:17:17And the Americans absolutely love us.
0:17:17 > 0:17:19They cannot get enough.
0:17:19 > 0:17:23Obviously audiences in the US don't get ALL the cultural references.
0:17:23 > 0:17:26So that's when our writing team come up with clever little fixes.
0:17:26 > 0:17:31Take for e.g. the now-legendary "Who's Paul Ross?" sequence.
0:17:31 > 0:17:35Nelson, you do realise he's probably the runt of the litter?
0:17:35 > 0:17:40And so what if he is? See, let me tell you about a runt of the litter.
0:17:40 > 0:17:42Born a sickly little thing,
0:17:42 > 0:17:45bullied by his siblings, parents didn't want to know.
0:17:45 > 0:17:48Do you know who that little mongrel grew up to be?
0:17:48 > 0:17:51- Who?- I'll tell you who - 'Stephen Baldwin'.
0:17:51 > 0:17:56- Who's 'Stephen Baldwin'?- Ha-ha, good one. Who's 'Stephen Baldwin!'
0:17:56 > 0:18:00- No seriously. Who's 'Stephen Baldwin?'- 'Stephen Baldwin.'
0:18:00 > 0:18:02- Who is he?- "Stephen Baldwin.' - Who's that?- 'Stephen Baldwin.'
0:18:02 > 0:18:05'Stephen Baldwin.' 'Stephen Baldwin.'
0:18:05 > 0:18:09Yes! 'Stephen Baldwin.' For God's sake, this 'Stephen Baldwin.'
0:18:09 > 0:18:11'Stephen Baldwin.' 'Stephen Baldwin.'
0:18:11 > 0:18:14I don't believe this. There! That 'Stephen Baldwin.'
0:18:14 > 0:18:18Now you can tell 'NBC' to take their seven million 'dollar' a year deal
0:18:18 > 0:18:22and their golden handcuffs and stick 'em where the sun does not shine.
0:18:22 > 0:18:26- You do realise he doesn't actually have phone?- 'Baldwin' out.
0:18:26 > 0:18:29And then of course, there's Vince - the fifth Mongrel.
0:18:29 > 0:18:34By turns uncouth, savage, violent and painfully vulnerable,
0:18:34 > 0:18:39author Will Self calls him "the most complicated fox in the history of television."
0:18:39 > 0:18:43- Did you just call God a- BLEEP- ?- No!
0:18:51 > 0:18:54You ate your own babies?!
0:18:54 > 0:18:55You know how it is, it's late,
0:18:55 > 0:18:59you can't be arsed to go to the all-night garage, you've nothing in the fridge.
0:18:59 > 0:19:03Vince, you've got Muller Rice!!
0:19:03 > 0:19:05Well, yeah, but no spoons.
0:19:05 > 0:19:07- BLEEP.- Sandra Bullock.
0:19:07 > 0:19:10- And- BLEEP- your- BLEEP- fancy- BLEEP.
0:19:10 > 0:19:12CONTINUOUS BLEEPING
0:19:15 > 0:19:19- I want to smash his- BLEEP- teeth out!
0:19:19 > 0:19:21SOBS: Stop using tool.
0:19:26 > 0:19:29- BLEEP- me. That's jaunty.
0:19:29 > 0:19:30That is jaunty.
0:19:30 > 0:19:33- That is very- BLEEP- jaunty.
0:19:33 > 0:19:37- As endearing as it may seem, Vince's great love of the word- BLEEP
0:19:37 > 0:19:40has caused the show its fair share of trouble.
0:19:40 > 0:19:45Well, yeah. I know I've caused a few problems in terms of merchandising.
0:19:47 > 0:19:52- Cheer up,- BLEEP- ! There's a new toy in town!
0:19:52 > 0:19:55'New Cuddly Vince! It swears!'
0:19:55 > 0:20:00CONTINUOUS BLEEP
0:20:00 > 0:20:02'New Cuddly Vince!'
0:20:02 > 0:20:06- Don't be a- BLEEP- ! Buy me!
0:20:07 > 0:20:11But then, that's the character. That's Vince.
0:20:11 > 0:20:15That's the creature I have to inhabit. He's a beast of impulse.
0:20:15 > 0:20:19Anyway, it's Simon I feel most sorry for.
0:20:19 > 0:20:22- Simon?- You know. The Sign Zone guy.
0:20:22 > 0:20:27Hold on. I smell chicken, and you know what I think
0:20:27 > 0:20:29about chickens, don't cha?!
0:20:32 > 0:20:35# They're not from this country they spread dem disease
0:20:35 > 0:20:39# They look the same and wiggle their heads when they speak
0:20:39 > 0:20:43# They lay loads of eggs to get free accommodation
0:20:43 > 0:20:46- #- BLEEP- all the chickens dem the scourge of the nation!
0:20:46 > 0:20:50- #- BLEEP- chickens #- BLEEP- 'em back where they belong
0:20:50 > 0:20:53- #- BLEEP- chickens, all the way to Hong Kong
0:20:57 > 0:21:00# You get loads and loads all living under one roof
0:21:00 > 0:21:03# They're no good at flying, people know the truth
0:21:03 > 0:21:07# Channel 4 make documentaries with them all the time
0:21:07 > 0:21:10# But no-one cares about the plight of the vulpine
0:21:10 > 0:21:13- #- CLUCK!- chickens, - CLUCK!- 'em back where they belong
0:21:13 > 0:21:18- #- CLUCK!- chickens, - CLUCK!- 'em all the way to Hong Kong
0:21:18 > 0:21:19# All together now!
0:21:19 > 0:21:22- #- HONK!- chickens - HONK!- 'em back where they belong
0:21:22 > 0:21:24- #- HONK!- chickens
0:21:24 > 0:21:26- #- HONK!- 'em all the way to Hong Kong
0:21:26 > 0:21:29- #- BEEP-BEEP!- chickens - BEEP!- 'em back where they belong
0:21:29 > 0:21:31- #- BEEP-BEEP!- chickens
0:21:31 > 0:21:35- # To actually- BLEEP- a chicken would be wrong.
0:21:35 > 0:21:38- Vince there, with the immortal- BLEEP- Chickens.
0:21:38 > 0:21:45Sure, the language may seem brutal, but the animal kingdom is a savage and unforgiving place.
0:21:45 > 0:21:51Let's now pause for a moment to pay our respects to some Mongrels we've lost along the way.
0:21:51 > 0:21:55MUSIC: "I Don't Want to Miss A Thing" Aerosmith
0:22:55 > 0:22:59Happily, a small handful of very special animals have survived
0:22:59 > 0:23:06long enough to establish themselves as much-loved members of the extended Mongrel family.
0:23:06 > 0:23:09Animals like Morgan Freeman Lamb.
0:23:09 > 0:23:13Anyway, Nelson, if you did the table plan, how come you stuck me with the freaks?
0:23:13 > 0:23:19- Tim and Nobby and that stupid sheep what talks like Laurence Fishburne. - I happen to be a lamb, madam.
0:23:19 > 0:23:23And I talk like Morgan goddamn Freeman!
0:23:23 > 0:23:27And then of course, there's Tim, the German badger with the bad teeth
0:23:27 > 0:23:33and the ever-so creepy obsession with his dear, sweet Mutti.
0:23:35 > 0:23:41Oh, ja. Looks like meine dinner plans just changed.
0:23:44 > 0:23:47More Pinot, Mutti?
0:23:49 > 0:23:54- Timothy!- Stefanni! I thought you had pilates!
0:23:54 > 0:23:58Guten abend, meine freundin! Lovely nacht for eine wandern!
0:23:58 > 0:24:01- Do him! - My God, a Nazi Badger!
0:24:01 > 0:24:06You think I'm a little camp, you should see Auschwitz. Galliano!
0:24:06 > 0:24:08Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!
0:24:08 > 0:24:11Please, that was many years ago.
0:24:11 > 0:24:14And ze badgers were really not involved at a very high level.
0:24:14 > 0:24:17- Ha! Ha!- Destiny!
0:24:17 > 0:24:21Halt! Das ist blatant gay bashing.
0:24:21 > 0:24:27- He's fine, he's not gay. - Oh! My mistake. As you were.
0:24:30 > 0:24:34And yet, casting the small but pivotal role of Timothy Lange
0:24:34 > 0:24:39provided the show's producers with one of the biggest headaches of all.
0:24:39 > 0:24:43I know they had LOADS of trouble finding someone to play Tim.
0:24:43 > 0:24:45They were casting at the height of the TB cull.
0:24:45 > 0:24:48I remember reading in Screen International -
0:24:48 > 0:24:52there was a shortage of short-legged, omnivorous members of the weasel family
0:24:52 > 0:24:55who had the acting chops to pull off dramatic character roles.
0:24:55 > 0:24:59After months of searching, they finally found an actor
0:24:59 > 0:25:02with the screen presence required to play Tim.
0:25:02 > 0:25:05And that's where the trouble started.
0:25:05 > 0:25:08Ah! He wasn't German, for a start.
0:25:08 > 0:25:12And that really is the absolute key to that role.
0:25:12 > 0:25:15If I'm honest, that IS the role,
0:25:15 > 0:25:19that's all it is - a funny German voice.
0:25:19 > 0:25:22And suddenly, all the press and the forums are like, "Wow, Tim's amazing,
0:25:22 > 0:25:28"Tim's this, Tim's that, breakout star!" Well, I'm sorry, but I'd like
0:25:28 > 0:25:34to see HIM carry off a dramatically engaging B-story week in, week out!
0:25:34 > 0:25:37No, it can be thankless, it can.
0:25:37 > 0:25:41Can Marion get his miso in here, please?!
0:25:41 > 0:25:44Director Adam Miller had always planned
0:25:44 > 0:25:47to revoice Tim at a later date.
0:25:47 > 0:25:50But we recorded all the scenes initially with his actual voice.
0:25:50 > 0:25:53And I was all like, "Dave Prowse!"
0:25:53 > 0:25:58Argh! I'm all kind of excited, when can we go back to Vince's place?!
0:25:58 > 0:26:02Actually, I'm not going in today. My, um, glands are up.
0:26:02 > 0:26:06No frigging way! Hope it's not the mumps. The silent killer.
0:26:06 > 0:26:07Mumps isn't the silent killer!
0:26:07 > 0:26:10Tim's the silent killer, aren't you, Tim?
0:26:13 > 0:26:17WEST COUNTRY ACCENT: Actually, no. Might be thinking of someone else.
0:26:17 > 0:26:20Oh, God. How embarrassing!
0:26:20 > 0:26:22Sorry. Didn't mean to show you up there.
0:26:22 > 0:26:27No, no. Totally my fault. Er... Salt! Salt's the silent killer.
0:26:27 > 0:26:31Yes, yes, it is. It's fine, I get that a lot.
0:26:31 > 0:26:33Anyway, love to the wife.
0:26:33 > 0:26:36Nice man. Terrible drinking problem.
0:26:36 > 0:26:39Did I know they were going to revoice me?
0:26:39 > 0:26:44No. I bloody did not. Shabby. The whole thing. Very shabby.
0:26:44 > 0:26:49Basically, they came to me last minute and they were like, "Can you do a German voice"
0:26:49 > 0:26:52and I said, "Actually, Ich can, as it goes,
0:26:52 > 0:26:58"I was raised on ein army base outside Dusseldorf, so I'm technically eine quarter Deutsch."
0:26:58 > 0:27:01So, yeah. I do Tim. I really enjoy it.
0:27:01 > 0:27:03Wow, that's incredible.
0:27:03 > 0:27:05What can I say - I got a facility for voices.
0:27:05 > 0:27:09Do you want to hear my impression of a Chinaman with his cock caught in his flies?
0:27:09 > 0:27:12Actually, I think that's all we've got time for.
0:27:12 > 0:27:15So, there it is. The real story behind a cultural phenomenon.
0:27:15 > 0:27:19A show at the bleeding-edge of comedy.
0:27:24 > 0:27:27A show never afraid to try something new.
0:27:27 > 0:27:29I think we're onto a winner here, Vince.
0:27:29 > 0:27:33Play it cool, son, nice and cool...
0:27:33 > 0:27:37So it seems fitting that the last words should go to a character
0:27:37 > 0:27:42whose irreverent spirit has come to define the world of Mongrels.
0:27:42 > 0:27:44Marion, take it away.
0:27:45 > 0:27:48Marion? Marion?
0:27:48 > 0:27:53Marion? Marion?
0:27:53 > 0:27:54Marion?
0:27:54 > 0:27:56Marion?
0:27:56 > 0:27:58Marion?
0:27:58 > 0:28:01Marion! Marion!
0:28:01 > 0:28:03Marion!
0:28:03 > 0:28:05Marion! Marion!
0:28:05 > 0:28:08Marion! Marion!
0:28:08 > 0:28:10Marion!
0:28:10 > 0:28:11Marion!
0:28:11 > 0:28:14Can Marion get some more Malibu in here, please?!