0:00:18 > 0:00:20So where are you off to tonight, Janey?
0:00:20 > 0:00:24That looks like your seal-the-deal, third-date outfit.
0:00:24 > 0:00:27Mike, I find that really offensive.
0:00:27 > 0:00:30It doesn't take me three dates to seal the deal.
0:00:30 > 0:00:32I'm going to our cousin Kirsty's hen night.
0:00:32 > 0:00:34I've never understood hen nights.
0:00:34 > 0:00:38It's an ancient ritual where women get together to binge drink,
0:00:38 > 0:00:40grope men and generally act like idiots.
0:00:40 > 0:00:46- Isn't that your normal weekend? - No, I'm wearing devil horns.
0:00:46 > 0:00:49Now, Kenzo, I'll be back late tonight,
0:00:49 > 0:00:51so I want you to be a good boy for Granddad.
0:00:51 > 0:00:53He's promised to look after you properly this time.
0:00:53 > 0:00:56I didn't mind going to the bookies for him.
0:00:56 > 0:00:58He knew he shouldn't have made you do that.
0:00:58 > 0:01:01But he said that nag was bound to romp home.
0:01:01 > 0:01:04He used to use that line on me too.
0:01:04 > 0:01:06So, I have rented your favourite cartoon for you.
0:01:06 > 0:01:11- Granddad said he'll watch it with you.- Thanks, Mummy.- OK?
0:01:11 > 0:01:13Mike, could you come back later, to keep an eye on him.
0:01:13 > 0:01:16Janey, Kenzo's eight, he doesn't need two of us to watch him.
0:01:16 > 0:01:21- It's not ME she wants you to watch. - Evening, all.
0:01:21 > 0:01:26Is there a spring in my step? Yes. Do I have a date tonight? Yes.
0:01:26 > 0:01:31Living the life of an international playboy? Yes.
0:01:31 > 0:01:34- Is that toilet paper stuck to your shoe?- Yes.
0:01:34 > 0:01:39- So you can't watch cartoons with me tonight?- Sorry, little man.
0:01:39 > 0:01:43This evening I'll be having a more adult version of fun.
0:01:43 > 0:01:48I'm afraid being a Lothario leaves little time for watching things like cartoons.
0:01:48 > 0:01:54- It's a new one. - Can I borrow it from you later?
0:01:54 > 0:01:56So, where'd you meet this girl?
0:01:56 > 0:02:00Oh, where does one meet the love of one's life? A stolen glance.
0:02:00 > 0:02:04A chance encounter, an impromptu sharing of an umbrella.
0:02:04 > 0:02:07- The internet?- Yes.
0:02:07 > 0:02:10You ready, Mum? Taxi should be here any minute.
0:02:10 > 0:02:13- What do you think? Too over the top? - Mum, it's a hen night.
0:02:13 > 0:02:16The whole night's going to be over the top.
0:02:16 > 0:02:19In fact, maybe we should set up a few ground rules.
0:02:19 > 0:02:23You're going out with Sasha and me so things can get a little crazy.
0:02:23 > 0:02:25Don't worry, darling. I won't spoil your fun.
0:02:25 > 0:02:29I'll just stay for a few drinks and then I'll shuffle off to the old people's home.
0:02:29 > 0:02:31That would be great.
0:02:31 > 0:02:35Oh, promise me one thing, darling, don't embarrass me too much.
0:02:35 > 0:02:36I'm sorry, I can't do that, Mum.
0:02:36 > 0:02:40And don't tell me you've hired some cheap, tacky stripper.
0:02:40 > 0:02:42HORN HONKS
0:02:42 > 0:02:44Taxi's here.
0:02:44 > 0:02:46I'm rather looking forward to tonight.
0:02:46 > 0:02:49- It will make up for my own hen night.- What did you do on yours?
0:02:49 > 0:02:51Well, it was a total anti-climax.
0:02:51 > 0:02:54I ended up in some cheap bedsit with a headache and a Cup a Soup,
0:02:54 > 0:02:57the only one still conscious after eight o'clock.
0:02:57 > 0:03:01Oh, no, hang on, that was my wedding night.
0:03:10 > 0:03:15This is the life, eh? Just me and you, eh, Kenzo? Just the lads.
0:03:15 > 0:03:18Mano to mano, bonding.
0:03:18 > 0:03:23Spending the evening together like a couple of good mates.
0:03:23 > 0:03:26Pop your own.
0:03:28 > 0:03:33- And what do you think you're doing now?- Putting my cartoon on.
0:03:33 > 0:03:37I don't think so. Tonight we're watching a film of my choice.
0:03:37 > 0:03:40But you promised Mum that we would watch my cartoon.
0:03:40 > 0:03:44My promises mean nothing, your mother knows that.
0:03:44 > 0:03:46But I want to watch my cartoon.
0:03:46 > 0:03:50It's about time you developed a more mature sense in cinema.
0:03:50 > 0:03:55Tonight, I shall be watching a piece of serious, high-octane cinema.
0:03:55 > 0:03:59Not a silly cartoon about a stupid, talking rat.
0:03:59 > 0:04:02My cartoon won an Oscar.
0:04:02 > 0:04:04Your film's an over-produced remake,
0:04:04 > 0:04:08aimed at twelve-year-olds with short attention spans.
0:04:12 > 0:04:15What? What were you saying?
0:04:17 > 0:04:22Where's Sasha? She's not usually late.
0:04:22 > 0:04:25She probably went out and started without me, the party animal.
0:04:25 > 0:04:28- Looks like she started without you all right.- What?
0:04:28 > 0:04:29THEY SCREAM
0:04:29 > 0:04:35- Look at you. What happened?- Oh, these shoes don't go with this top.
0:04:35 > 0:04:39Sasha, this is kind of a surprise.
0:04:39 > 0:04:44- You're telling me. What do you think about Tequila? - Are you sure you should be drinking?
0:04:44 > 0:04:46- No, I mean as the baby name. - That's nice.
0:04:46 > 0:04:53- It already has memories for you. - Now, where's the bride to be?
0:04:53 > 0:04:54Oh, she's here.
0:04:54 > 0:04:56THEY SCREAM
0:04:56 > 0:04:59THEY HUM "THE WEDDING MARCH"
0:05:04 > 0:05:07Kirsty, welcome to the wildest night of your life!
0:05:07 > 0:05:09THEY SCREAM
0:05:09 > 0:05:11How does it feel?
0:05:11 > 0:05:15He dumped me.
0:05:15 > 0:05:20Well, this is going well(!)
0:05:27 > 0:05:32- Can I help you, sir? - I'm just looking for my date.
0:05:32 > 0:05:35Ah, that must be her.
0:05:38 > 0:05:43Excuse me, are you looking for a Roger?
0:05:43 > 0:05:45I'm sorry, I thought she was looking for a Roger.
0:05:45 > 0:05:51- Is anyone here looking for a Roger?- Let me show you to a table.
0:05:51 > 0:05:56- Blind date? - Yes, met her on the Internet.
0:05:56 > 0:05:59Although I haven't had much luck meeting women like that.
0:05:59 > 0:06:03There was one with the screen name "Clare76".
0:06:03 > 0:06:06I thought the "76" was the year she was born.
0:06:06 > 0:06:07Turns out it was her age.
0:06:07 > 0:06:09She'd had that screen name for a long time.
0:06:09 > 0:06:12And the next woman was lovely.
0:06:12 > 0:06:16But having her probation officer there really spoiled the mood.
0:06:16 > 0:06:21- Well, third time lucky. - No, no, it wasn't.
0:06:21 > 0:06:26I ended up meeting a 50-year-old pig farmer PRETENDING to be a woman.
0:06:26 > 0:06:30- Oh, I'm sorry. - Oh, no, no, no, don't be.
0:06:30 > 0:06:35He sent me a nice ham last Easter.
0:06:35 > 0:06:40- This film is rubbish.- Excuse me?
0:06:41 > 0:06:46How can a film about a man from the future having a mutant virus
0:06:46 > 0:06:49injected into his bloodstream be rubbish?
0:06:49 > 0:06:53- It's not realistic, it's just stupid.- Shhh, please.
0:06:53 > 0:06:56You're ruining the ambience.
0:06:56 > 0:06:58DOORBELL RINGS
0:06:58 > 0:06:59Who could that be?
0:06:59 > 0:07:05- I ordered you a pizza, Granddad. - You did what? Why would you do that?
0:07:05 > 0:07:10Well, I know how you like to eat pizza and watch action films, so...
0:07:10 > 0:07:16Ah, Kenzo. You are... That's so generous. Here, here.
0:07:18 > 0:07:21I feel really bad about not letting you see your cartoon now.
0:07:21 > 0:07:24- So I can watch it?- Not that bad.
0:07:24 > 0:07:27- DOORBELL RINGS - Yeah, all right. Hang on.
0:07:32 > 0:07:34Yeah, hello!
0:07:36 > 0:07:37Hello!
0:07:39 > 0:07:43- That's not funny, Kenzo! - Yes, it is.- Kenzo.
0:07:43 > 0:07:45Who rang the doorbell?
0:07:45 > 0:07:48I paid my friend down the road to ring it and then run off.
0:07:48 > 0:07:51- I'm missing my film.- That's kind of the point.- Kenzo, look.
0:07:51 > 0:07:53I'm going to count to...
0:07:53 > 0:07:58Kenzo, I'm going to count to three and you will answer this door, OK?
0:07:58 > 0:08:01One, two, three!
0:08:01 > 0:08:06- I think it works better if there's a threat at the end of it.- Kenzo!
0:08:06 > 0:08:08You open this door. Do you hear me?
0:08:08 > 0:08:16Kenzo, you will open this door, do you hear me? Kenzo!
0:08:16 > 0:08:21Shh, you're ruining the ambience.
0:08:22 > 0:08:25Look, Kirsty, tonight doesn't have to be
0:08:25 > 0:08:28a celebration of the last night of your freedom.
0:08:28 > 0:08:32- It could be a celebration of your freedom.- Yeah, who needs men anyway?
0:08:32 > 0:08:36- Clearly not you. - Now, listen, Kirsty,
0:08:36 > 0:08:40- there are plenty more fish in the sea.- Neil loved fish.
0:08:40 > 0:08:46- Oh, come on, Kirsty, let a smile be your umbrella.- Neil loved umbrellas.
0:08:46 > 0:08:50Why don't you tell us what Neil didn't love and we can come up with better analogies.
0:08:50 > 0:08:54- Well, he clearly didn't love me. - Nice one, Mum.
0:08:54 > 0:08:58All I'm saying is, this is as bad as it's going to get.
0:08:58 > 0:09:02Aunt Susan, I've got 200 people coming to the Rose and Crown tomorrow.
0:09:02 > 0:09:06OK, tomorrow's as bad as it's going to get.
0:09:06 > 0:09:09And a honeymoon in Mauritius with no-one to go with.
0:09:09 > 0:09:15See? You're making tonight look better and better.
0:09:15 > 0:09:21Ha, ha, who forgot to lock the back door, you silly boy, eh?
0:09:24 > 0:09:28Who forgot to lock the back door, you amateur.
0:09:28 > 0:09:32Kenzo?
0:09:32 > 0:09:34Oh, God. Oi, Kenzo!
0:09:34 > 0:09:37Kenzo!
0:09:41 > 0:09:43Amateur!
0:09:45 > 0:09:48- So, what do you think happened? - Sounds like he got cold feet.
0:09:48 > 0:09:52I think somebody should call Neil and sort this out.
0:09:52 > 0:09:55Trust me, it's better if we stay out of this. Kirsty's a strong girl.
0:09:55 > 0:09:57All she needs is a shoulder to cry on.
0:10:03 > 0:10:05Or a backside.
0:10:11 > 0:10:13Fine, I'll call him.
0:10:19 > 0:10:21Hmmm.
0:10:21 > 0:10:26What goes with crisps, cheese and Jelly Tots?
0:10:28 > 0:10:29Ice cream!
0:10:43 > 0:10:46Oh, that looks disgusting.
0:10:46 > 0:10:49Who asked you?
0:10:49 > 0:10:52Can you save me a little bit of ice cream, please?
0:10:52 > 0:10:53Sorry, I'm a growing boy.
0:10:55 > 0:10:59Look, Kenzo, is there any chance of letting me in to see my film?
0:10:59 > 0:11:03Apparently, there's an amazing twist in the middle that comes as a complete surprise.
0:11:03 > 0:11:08- I really don't want to miss it. - Oh, where they found out the main girl was an alien all along?
0:11:10 > 0:11:12Thank you.
0:11:21 > 0:11:24- Can I get you another drink, sir? - Oh, no. Roger.
0:11:24 > 0:11:28Yes, I gathered that earlier from the whole, "Is anyone looking for a Roger?" thing.
0:11:28 > 0:11:30Or at least I hoped.
0:11:30 > 0:11:34- Well, it's nice to meet you, uh... - Ellie.
0:11:34 > 0:11:35So, what do you do for a living, Roger?
0:11:35 > 0:11:38Oh, I'm a dentist. You?
0:11:38 > 0:11:41Well...I'm a waitress.
0:11:41 > 0:11:43Oh, sorry. Yes, yes, yes, of course.
0:11:43 > 0:11:45Oh, sorry. I'm a bit nervous.
0:11:45 > 0:11:49Don't be. You'll be OK, you're funny.
0:11:49 > 0:11:51I've enjoyed talking to you.
0:11:51 > 0:11:57Well, I don't like to brag, but I have become quite proficient in the art of conversation.
0:11:57 > 0:11:59I spend hours practising.
0:11:59 > 0:12:02Which is hard when you live alone.
0:12:08 > 0:12:10What have you got there?
0:12:10 > 0:12:12I ordered pizza.
0:12:12 > 0:12:15How did you pay for that? You haven't got any money.
0:12:15 > 0:12:17I know, but you do.
0:12:17 > 0:12:21You gave him a good tip, too.
0:12:21 > 0:12:24Thank you.
0:12:29 > 0:12:31Mojito?
0:12:31 > 0:12:34Sash, it's not really the best baby name, but...
0:12:34 > 0:12:37No! I was going to buy you a drink.
0:12:37 > 0:12:38Oh, Sash.
0:12:40 > 0:12:43So, listen, about your mum...
0:12:43 > 0:12:46Oh, I know, I know. I knew a hen night wouldn't be her thing.
0:12:46 > 0:12:47But she insisted on coming.
0:12:47 > 0:12:52No, actually I think she's pretty cool. The way she's mucked in and helped Kirsty out.
0:12:52 > 0:12:55I wish my mum was like that. She can be so embarrassing.
0:12:55 > 0:12:59So, her 15-minute lecture on how to use a breast pump wasn't embarrassing?
0:12:59 > 0:13:00No way!
0:13:00 > 0:13:05So, listen, when we go to Ayia Napa next month, I was thinking...
0:13:05 > 0:13:08- Please, no. - Why don't we ask your mum along?
0:13:08 > 0:13:09Sasha, look, I love and respect my mum.
0:13:09 > 0:13:13But if you invite her, there's no way on earth I'll be there, too.
0:13:13 > 0:13:15Oh, I see.
0:13:15 > 0:13:17So can I get her number?
0:13:22 > 0:13:26Dad. What are you doing outside?
0:13:26 > 0:13:30I'm wishing upon a star, Michael(!)
0:13:30 > 0:13:32What the hell do you think I'm doing?
0:13:32 > 0:13:34Kenzo's locked me out.
0:13:35 > 0:13:37Little scamp.
0:13:37 > 0:13:40- Give me your key.- Haven't got it.
0:13:40 > 0:13:41Oh, great(!)
0:13:41 > 0:13:46So every time I want to be at home and have a little privacy, you just let yourself in.
0:13:46 > 0:13:50The one time, the one time I want your key and you haven't got it.
0:13:50 > 0:13:55- It's called irony, Dad. - Ring the naffing bell.
0:13:55 > 0:14:01Before you do, when the kid answers, the door step aside quickly so I can rush in and take the kid by surprise.
0:14:01 > 0:14:04You really do lead a sad and peculiar life, don't you, Dad?
0:14:04 > 0:14:06Just do it!
0:14:06 > 0:14:08DOORBELL RINGS
0:14:08 > 0:14:11- Who's there?- It's Uncle Michael.
0:14:17 > 0:14:20So, can I get you a drink?
0:14:20 > 0:14:22Yeah, that'd be great, cheers.
0:14:22 > 0:14:25- What are you watching?- Cartoons.
0:14:25 > 0:14:26Cool.
0:14:29 > 0:14:31Thanks for coming, Neil.
0:14:31 > 0:14:33I know you're going through a lot right now,
0:14:33 > 0:14:37but I just wondered if this is something we can talk through.
0:14:37 > 0:14:41Because I've found that so much can be solved through communication,
0:14:41 > 0:14:44a dialogue, an exchange of thoughts and opinions. Don't you agree?
0:14:44 > 0:14:46I suppose.
0:14:46 > 0:14:52- Is it possible that you were just overwhelmed by this whole thing and got cold feet?- Dunno.
0:14:52 > 0:14:55Well, let's just go with that as a concept.
0:14:55 > 0:15:00I mean, the mere fact that you don't know might mean you're just not sure. Is that right?
0:15:00 > 0:15:04- Dunno.- What DO you know, exactly?
0:15:05 > 0:15:09I'm wondering how you managed to string enough words together to finish with her.
0:15:09 > 0:15:11Oh, that was easy. I texted her.
0:15:11 > 0:15:15Well, aren't you the last of the great romantics(?)
0:15:15 > 0:15:17See, the thing is,
0:15:17 > 0:15:19I don't know if I want to be married right now.
0:15:19 > 0:15:21I just wonder if I can do any better.
0:15:21 > 0:15:23Let me answer that for you.
0:15:23 > 0:15:27- You can't.- I mean, look at me.
0:15:27 > 0:15:28I'm a good-looking guy, right?
0:15:28 > 0:15:31I get a lot of attention.
0:15:31 > 0:15:34I'm not sure I'm ready to take myself off the market just yet.
0:15:34 > 0:15:36- You're serious?- Yeah.
0:15:36 > 0:15:40I'm what the ladies refer to as "a catch".
0:15:40 > 0:15:44The thing about Neil is, he always seals the deal.
0:15:44 > 0:15:46I'm sorry.
0:15:46 > 0:15:50I'm just fighting the urge to physically strike you.
0:15:51 > 0:15:53What's in this sandwich again?
0:15:53 > 0:15:59Cheese, crisps, Jelly Tots
0:15:59 > 0:16:01and ice cream.
0:16:01 > 0:16:03And just a dash of pepper.
0:16:07 > 0:16:08Too much pepper?
0:16:10 > 0:16:13No, just the right amount.
0:16:13 > 0:16:17You know, on no level should this sandwich work.
0:16:17 > 0:16:19But it does, doesn't it?
0:16:19 > 0:16:21Totally.
0:16:24 > 0:16:25So, what's up with you and my dad tonight?
0:16:25 > 0:16:32Well, he wanted to watch his film and I wanted to watch mine.
0:16:32 > 0:16:33So I locked him out.
0:16:33 > 0:16:38Fair enough. Do you know when you're going to let him in again?
0:16:39 > 0:16:43How much longer's left of this cartoon?
0:16:43 > 0:16:44Another hour.
0:16:44 > 0:16:48Three hours then.
0:16:48 > 0:16:50You know, it's funny,
0:16:50 > 0:16:55watching the mind games you play with my dad, and the physical ordeals you put him through,
0:16:55 > 0:16:59well, it takes me back to when I was your age. It's so sweet.
0:16:59 > 0:17:02Don't get soppy now.
0:17:02 > 0:17:05No, no, I'm just saying.
0:17:05 > 0:17:09You know, it's nice to see similarities with other family members.
0:17:09 > 0:17:10Gives you something to bond over.
0:17:10 > 0:17:16Michael, if you don't let me in, I am going to inflict so much pain
0:17:16 > 0:17:19on you, you will see death as a sweet release.
0:17:19 > 0:17:23A sweet release, you hear me?!
0:17:23 > 0:17:24It IS nice, isn't it?
0:17:31 > 0:17:33So you were married once?
0:17:33 > 0:17:35Ah, yes.
0:17:35 > 0:17:37She was a wonderful woman.
0:17:37 > 0:17:42But relationships are such finely-balanced, nuanced things.
0:17:42 > 0:17:45And we were moving in slightly different directions.
0:17:45 > 0:17:48What happened?
0:17:48 > 0:17:50She became a nun.
0:17:50 > 0:17:53What about you?
0:17:53 > 0:17:56I'm just looking for someone who likes the same things I do.
0:17:56 > 0:17:58Board games, long walks, going to the zoo.
0:17:58 > 0:18:01But I love those things!
0:18:01 > 0:18:03- Really?- Yes.
0:18:03 > 0:18:06Ellie, look, I know this sounds silly but,
0:18:06 > 0:18:09maybe things were meant to work out like this - my date not showing up.
0:18:09 > 0:18:11I think you might be right.
0:18:11 > 0:18:14Do you think you and I...
0:18:14 > 0:18:15I'm looking for a Roger.
0:18:15 > 0:18:18I'm looking for a Roger.
0:18:19 > 0:18:22Let me guess, Vera?
0:18:22 > 0:18:24I'll leave you to your date.
0:18:24 > 0:18:29Well, we're going to have to do something about that now, aren't we?
0:18:29 > 0:18:33Yes. Well, it's nice to finally meet you.
0:18:33 > 0:18:36I'm sorry I'm late, I've not been well.
0:18:36 > 0:18:38I had to lie down.
0:18:38 > 0:18:41I'm on antibiotics for fungus.
0:18:43 > 0:18:45You're a quiet one, aren't you?
0:18:47 > 0:18:51Oh, no. No, I can't get anything off this menu.
0:18:51 > 0:18:53I'll be sick at both ends.
0:18:55 > 0:18:57You're making a mistake here, Neil.
0:18:57 > 0:19:00You and Kirsty could be really happy together.
0:19:00 > 0:19:04Trust me, I know how fulfilling a marriage can be.
0:19:04 > 0:19:07Mostly by looking at other people's.
0:19:07 > 0:19:12I suppose what I'm struggling to understand here is why you asked her to marry you in the first place.
0:19:12 > 0:19:14Well, she's not TOO bad, I suppose.
0:19:14 > 0:19:19Let me rephrase that. What I'm struggling to understand is why she said yes.
0:19:19 > 0:19:22Look, Neil, you've broken the girl's heart.
0:19:22 > 0:19:24Have I?
0:19:24 > 0:19:27Yes! I mean, just look at her.
0:19:27 > 0:19:29Don't you feel anything?
0:19:29 > 0:19:31Yeah, I do.
0:19:31 > 0:19:35- You're going to talk to her? - Nah, I need to use the toilet.
0:19:37 > 0:19:40Why don't you flush yourself while you're at it?
0:19:44 > 0:19:47Well, you dodged a bullet there, Kirsty.
0:19:47 > 0:19:49That man is a complete pillock.
0:19:49 > 0:19:51- What did he say?- I don't know.
0:19:51 > 0:19:55I lost track of how many grunts for yes and how many grunts for no.
0:19:55 > 0:19:57Kirsty, you could do so much better.
0:19:57 > 0:20:01- You think? - Of course. You're worth ten of him.
0:20:01 > 0:20:04The whole family has been talking about this
0:20:04 > 0:20:07for the past few months and we all agree you're better off without him.
0:20:07 > 0:20:09- He's dull.- He's arrogant.
0:20:09 > 0:20:11And he's a rubbish kisser.
0:20:14 > 0:20:15Apparently.
0:20:48 > 0:20:50Is that the best you've got?
0:21:02 > 0:21:05And you know,
0:21:05 > 0:21:08ever since I've known him, he's never remembered my birthday.
0:21:08 > 0:21:10What a scumbag!
0:21:10 > 0:21:12Makes Ben look like Prince Charming.
0:21:12 > 0:21:15And you have no idea what an understatement that is.
0:21:15 > 0:21:18I'll tell you something, I've been out with a lot of losers in my time...
0:21:18 > 0:21:21And you have no idea what an understatement that is.
0:21:21 > 0:21:25But this guy, this guy, he's a complete waste of space.
0:21:25 > 0:21:29You're right. He would never lift a finger round the house.
0:21:29 > 0:21:33- And try getting him to pay for dinner.- What a dead weight!
0:21:33 > 0:21:35To Kirsty.
0:21:35 > 0:21:41To Kirsty and her great escape from an arrogant, self-obsessed troglodyte.
0:21:41 > 0:21:43ALL: To Kirsty!
0:21:46 > 0:21:49I'll tell you what, Kirsty, you are the luckiest woman in the world tonight.
0:21:49 > 0:21:54If you'd married him, you'd be as big a loser as he is.
0:21:58 > 0:22:01Listen, so how about we do this thing tomorrow, then?
0:22:01 > 0:22:03OK.
0:22:07 > 0:22:11But seeing you two kids together...
0:22:11 > 0:22:13it's magic.
0:22:18 > 0:22:21See you, Kenzo! Thanks for inviting me over.
0:22:27 > 0:22:30- See you, Dad!- Shut up, Mikey!- What?
0:22:30 > 0:22:35I'm trying to climb in through the window and be stealth-like.
0:22:35 > 0:22:38- I'm using the element of surprise. - I can't hear you!
0:22:38 > 0:22:41I said I'm trying to be stealth-like and climb through the window.
0:22:41 > 0:22:43- Come again?- Push off!
0:22:43 > 0:22:48- All right, Dad. No need to shout. - Idiot.
0:22:53 > 0:22:55You're becoming tiresome.
0:23:01 > 0:23:03Are you finished with these?
0:23:03 > 0:23:04- Yes.- No,- I'm- not.
0:23:05 > 0:23:09Anyway, that's the freeing thing about losing your toenails.
0:23:09 > 0:23:12They grow back beautifully...
0:23:12 > 0:23:14I hope!
0:23:16 > 0:23:21So, who gets the bill? Oh, look at me, I've got alligator arms!
0:23:23 > 0:23:29For someone who couldn't eat anything off the menu, you seem to have done rather well.
0:23:31 > 0:23:34No, look, you're leaving way too much of a tip.
0:23:34 > 0:23:36One, two...
0:23:39 > 0:23:42Well, it was very nice meeting you.
0:23:42 > 0:23:45Oh, honey, our night's not over yet.
0:23:47 > 0:23:50I haven't shaved my 'pits for nothing.
0:23:51 > 0:23:53Yes. Yes, of course.
0:23:59 > 0:24:00Hi.
0:24:00 > 0:24:02Did you forget something?
0:24:02 > 0:24:04Yes.
0:24:04 > 0:24:08I forgot to ask you out when I should have.
0:24:08 > 0:24:11- Would you like to go out with me? - Absolutely.
0:24:11 > 0:24:14But there's one thing you should know. I have all my toenails.
0:24:14 > 0:24:17- I hope that's not a problem. - Not at all.
0:24:20 > 0:24:24Roger, does your bathroom have a window, or shall I do it here?
0:24:28 > 0:24:32We've had a bit of fun tonight, Kenzo. OK?
0:24:32 > 0:24:35So, why don't you open the window?
0:24:35 > 0:24:38Why should I? You wouldn't let me watch my cartoon.
0:24:38 > 0:24:45Maybe we can come to some little arrangement and I could make it worth your while, if you let me in.
0:24:45 > 0:24:49- Go on. - Well, I can be a very generous man.
0:24:49 > 0:24:50I'm listening. What have you got?
0:24:50 > 0:24:52Depends what you want.
0:24:52 > 0:24:56Sweets, new football boots and a bike.
0:24:56 > 0:24:59A good one though, something classy.
0:24:59 > 0:25:06- How good are we talking?- Well, it's got to be a limited edition mountain bike, with 14 gears.
0:25:06 > 0:25:10- Would you accept a second-hand model? - I'll pretend I didn't hear that.
0:25:10 > 0:25:13Oh, come on. They're very expensive, I've had a bad month.
0:25:13 > 0:25:15Well, it's not my problem.
0:25:15 > 0:25:18You know my demands, I've put my offer on the table, I can be
0:25:18 > 0:25:22a very reasonable man but I will not be held to ransom.
0:25:22 > 0:25:25Fine. Stay out there, then. I win.
0:25:25 > 0:25:28- I didn't want it to come to this, Kenzo.- To what?
0:25:28 > 0:25:33I think you'll find your old Granddad still has an ace up his sleeve.
0:25:35 > 0:25:38What if I were to smash the window?
0:25:38 > 0:25:41- You're bluffing.- Oh, I am, am I?
0:25:41 > 0:25:43I think you are.
0:25:43 > 0:25:46You think... Kenzo, you walk away, I'm going to smash the win... Kenzo.
0:25:46 > 0:25:49You walk away, I'm going to smash the... Kenzo!
0:25:52 > 0:25:55Ha-ha! You didn't think I'd do that, did you.
0:25:55 > 0:25:57Now I'm in.
0:25:57 > 0:25:59No, you're not.
0:26:08 > 0:26:12- Hi.- Hey, Mum.
0:26:12 > 0:26:14Where's Grandma?
0:26:14 > 0:26:20Well, Grandma drank a very fun drink, which made her very happy.
0:26:20 > 0:26:23And, as a result, made her dance very energetically.
0:26:23 > 0:26:28Until some men came over to take her to see some other men to talk about what she'd done.
0:26:28 > 0:26:30So she got drunk and arrested?
0:26:30 > 0:26:33In a nutshell.
0:26:33 > 0:26:36So, how was your evening?
0:26:36 > 0:26:38- Pretty quiet, really.- Yeah?
0:26:38 > 0:26:41Did you and Granddad enjoy your cartoon?
0:26:41 > 0:26:46- Well, I did. Granddad didn't really get to see it.- Really? Why?
0:26:46 > 0:26:48He fancied some fresh air.
0:26:52 > 0:26:56- So, where is he now?- He went to bed.
0:26:56 > 0:26:58He tired himself out,
0:26:58 > 0:27:00he's had a lot of excitement tonight.
0:27:00 > 0:27:03Ah, bless.
0:27:03 > 0:27:05MUFFLED: Kenzo!
0:27:07 > 0:27:09Is that your Granddad?
0:27:09 > 0:27:11He's probably just having a bad dream.
0:27:14 > 0:27:17Popcorn?
0:27:17 > 0:27:19Kenzo!
0:27:35 > 0:27:38Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd
0:27:38 > 0:27:41E-mail subtitling@bbc.co.uk