:00:00. > :00:12.439 items of lost property at a Staffordshire theme park include a
:00:13. > :00:18.spring onion. Police in Newfoundland have arrested a man for trying to
:00:19. > :00:22.break into prison. 1,300 Swiss carpenters have set a new world
:00:23. > :00:27.record clapping record. Headline of the week from the talking herald
:00:28. > :00:32.painterman offers reward after speed bump stolen. That's the world this
:00:33. > :00:35.evening from No Such Thing As The News.
:00:36. > :00:51.CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
:00:52. > :00:57.Hello and welcome to another episode of No Such Thing As The News. Coming
:00:58. > :01:01.to you from up the creek in Greenwich London. I'm Dan Schreiber
:01:02. > :01:04.I'm sitting here with Anna Ptaszynski, Andrew Hunter Murray and
:01:05. > :01:04.James Harkin. CHEERING AND
:01:05. > :01:15.APPLAUSE. Each week we will be presenting to
:01:16. > :01:20.you the most interesting stories we found in the news in the last seven
:01:21. > :01:24.days. No particular order, here we go. Starting with you, Andrew Hunter
:01:25. > :01:29.Murray. My fact is, that the first time the British Cabinet approved
:01:30. > :01:32.plans for a third runway at Heathrow the check-in desk was still a row of
:01:33. > :01:46.tents. There it is. When was that? 1946. It was as it
:01:47. > :01:51.opened as a civilian airfield. 46, two runways. They said - we need a
:01:52. > :01:54.third one at some point. That's a good idea, let's do that. They have
:01:55. > :01:59.kind of been having that discussion since then. The The decision was
:02:00. > :02:04.meant to happen this week. It has been put off for one week. 0 years
:02:05. > :02:07.so far, one more week won't make that much difference. There is
:02:08. > :02:11.another sub-committee who look into it next week. Within a week of that
:02:12. > :02:16.they hold the Commons vote. That vote is only to see what the Commons
:02:17. > :02:20.thinks of it. Then they have to have a public consultation. Then they
:02:21. > :02:25.have to something called a National Policy Statement. The whole thing
:02:26. > :02:29.could take up top two years. If Trump gets in we will all be living
:02:30. > :02:36.in tents anyway. They are nice tents. Like clamping. They are nice
:02:37. > :02:42.on the inside. Sofas and bowls of flowers. It sounds significantly
:02:43. > :02:44.better than check-in now. Yes. So, Vote Trump.
:02:45. > :02:51.CHEERING AND APPLAUSE. The third busiest airport in the
:02:52. > :02:56.world. It makes sense that would happen. I was reading that basically
:02:57. > :03:03.they have four invisible roundabouts above the airport. What? So many
:03:04. > :03:06.planes are landing, they don't have time to facilitate landing them all
:03:07. > :03:12.on a direct route. They have four spaces in the world, called stats.
:03:13. > :03:21.It's basically just a giant invisible roundabout. You spend 20
:03:22. > :03:26.minutes circling around for round it abouts. Is it give way to the left?
:03:27. > :03:33.You said moving to the left. Scientists in Queensland, at the
:03:34. > :03:39.University of Queens lance land are using budgies to stop plane crashes?
:03:40. > :03:44.I giant? They are normal size. Are he this using them as those bats to
:03:45. > :03:50.wave. What they've done, they noticed if you get a load of budgies
:03:51. > :03:55.in a small area they don't fly into each other that much. They filmed a
:03:56. > :04:00.group of them. When they come near each other they always turn right.
:04:01. > :04:04.If each one is turning right they always miss each other. Hold on. Can
:04:05. > :04:07.I check. We hadn't worked out that in order to not crash into each
:04:08. > :04:15.other we had to have a system where by we knew which way to turn when we
:04:16. > :04:19.saw an oncoming plane we had to wait for the budgies to tell us. A plane
:04:20. > :04:22.had to land on three wheels this week. It was a British Airways
:04:23. > :04:26.plane. It was leaving London to go to Chicago and then I think the
:04:27. > :04:29.pilots realised that their wheel under carriage was locked am they
:04:30. > :04:36.wouldn't be able to get the wheels out properly and land properly. They
:04:37. > :04:39.turned around. It landed on three wheels rather than five. It's
:04:40. > :04:46.common. It's called a belly landing if there is a malfunction with the
:04:47. > :04:50.plane. It's called a gear uplanding if the pilot forgets to put the
:04:51. > :04:56.wheels down. Is it that he forgets or something goes wrong? It's always
:04:57. > :05:00.human errorsor. When they don't go down it's human error. No. There is
:05:01. > :05:06.a book called Aviation Management, there is an old flying adadge, there
:05:07. > :05:14.are two types of pilot, those who have landed gear up and those that
:05:15. > :05:16.will. Wow! They have noticed that budgies always put their feet down
:05:17. > :05:22.when they land. That's really interesting.
:05:23. > :05:37.APPLAUSE. Heathrow was almost called Swintonfield after the Air Minister.
:05:38. > :05:40.People worried people from other countries couldn't pronounced
:05:41. > :05:44.Heathrow. The first ever take off and landing at Heathrow was in 1925,
:05:45. > :05:49.way before the airport was actually there. It was a pilot called Norm
:05:50. > :05:52.app Mak Milan am he needed somewhere to land because his plane was in
:05:53. > :05:57.trouble. . He saw this patch in Hounslow. He went down, he landed.
:05:58. > :06:04.Later on he took off and he thought - this is a nice flat bit. That is
:06:05. > :06:14.how Heathrow became Heathrow. Before they used its a an airport it was
:06:15. > :06:17.used for ploughing competitions. I was following a ploughing
:06:18. > :06:22.competition in America, just recently... What do you mean
:06:23. > :06:29.following? Like, in the news. I read it was happening. Very exciting. Is
:06:30. > :06:34.it. Great ploughers out there. It's a worldwide thing. Did it make you
:06:35. > :06:40.wonder why they ever made an airport when ploughing... Why do you needed
:06:41. > :06:43.to go anywhere. Some people have to get to the ploughing competition.
:06:44. > :06:47.Another bit of news about airports that appeared in the last couple of
:06:48. > :06:51.weeks. It's worth everyone knowing. It's that in Iraq the Transport
:06:52. > :06:54.Minister recently did a conference in which to announce the fact they
:06:55. > :06:57.were constructing a new airport. During the conference he announced a
:06:58. > :07:02.very important historical fact, which is that Iraq actually had the
:07:03. > :07:08.oldest airport ever in the world. This is during his actual
:07:09. > :07:18.presentation. Perhaps many do not know that the first airport to be
:07:19. > :07:25.built on planet earth, 5,000 years ago, was built here. When they
:07:26. > :07:29.settled here they knew well that atmosphere was suitable for flying
:07:30. > :07:34.to Uter space. It was from here that the spaceships took off towards the
:07:35. > :07:38.other planets. That is the Iraqi Transport Minister. We need to move
:07:39. > :07:42.on very shortly. Does anyone have anything before we do? This is
:07:43. > :07:46.another thing from earlier on this year about aeroplanes. Iron Maiden,
:07:47. > :07:51.the band, heavy metal band they got a new aeroplane this year. In fact,
:07:52. > :07:55.their lead singer is also a pilot. He flies all their planes when they
:07:56. > :07:58.go places. They had to alter their travel plans this year because they
:07:59. > :08:07.were supposed to touch down in tort Monday, it turned out that the metal
:08:08. > :08:13.out of which their plane was built was too heavy and had to reconnect
:08:14. > :08:22.their flight and get a connecting bus. Amazing. Fantastic. OK. We will
:08:23. > :08:30.have to move on to our second fact of the show. That is, James Harkin.
:08:31. > :08:33.This week's leaked Hillary Clinton speeches only exist because her
:08:34. > :08:41.staff were sending them to each other saying, "what are we going to
:08:42. > :08:46.do if these get leaked?" That's in an actual email that they... Yes.
:08:47. > :08:51.Basically, she did these speeches to Wall Street. It's a bit
:08:52. > :08:53.controversial because a lot of Democrats don't think she should be
:08:54. > :08:56.close to Wall Street. It's embarrassing for her. They didn't
:08:57. > :09:00.want anyone to see these things. People were sending them to each
:09:01. > :09:05.other saying, "what are we going to do?" Her campaign Chairman had his
:09:06. > :09:08.emails leaked which meant we saw all the conversations about these
:09:09. > :09:14.speeches. Right. That is how we get to know about them. The Clinton team
:09:15. > :09:21.haven't confirmed or denied that these leaks are real. Hillary's
:09:22. > :09:23.running mate doesn't give any creedance to the documents because
:09:24. > :09:30.he doesn't know if they are accurate. There has been polling out
:09:31. > :09:35.today shows that one in four 18-35-year-olds would prefer a giant
:09:36. > :09:44.meet other to hit either of the candidates. Not one, either. It's a
:09:45. > :09:49.weird election where you could put Nick Clegg against these two and he
:09:50. > :09:53.would win, right? There is only one way that I can see that Donald Trump
:09:54. > :10:02.could win this election, and that is if they hold it in Russia. Because,
:10:03. > :10:06.Wayne Gallop did a poll of 45 countries in the world, which
:10:07. > :10:10.represents 75% of the world's population and asked, would you vote
:10:11. > :10:15.for Hillary or Trump. In Russia Trump has a 23% lead. In America
:10:16. > :10:20.Hillary has a 7% lead. Everywhere else in the world she has a higher
:10:21. > :10:34.lead than she does in America. She has 9% lead in China, 49% lead in
:10:35. > :10:38.the UK, 80% lead in Portugal. 80%. Trump gets 5%ed in Portugal against
:10:39. > :10:49.her 85 and some don't knows. They all went for the meet other. --
:10:50. > :10:55.meter. Tior. He has a lead against robots. An academic story of the
:10:56. > :11:02.first first debate and reaction online. Trump got four times as many
:11:03. > :11:06.tweets from bots than Clinton. If you fweet more than 50 times a day
:11:07. > :11:10.you are probably a robot, that is how they measure it. Bots tend to
:11:11. > :11:18.follow many more accounts than they are followed by in turn. A sign that
:11:19. > :11:21.they do not have real friends. All these really depressed people
:11:22. > :11:25.listening to this. On Clinton, there is this scandal about the fact she
:11:26. > :11:30.helicopter emails on a private server. An article this week said
:11:31. > :11:35.Clinton was unaware of the requirement in 2012 to turn over her
:11:36. > :11:41.emails when she left office that may be due to to a concussion in 2012.
:11:42. > :11:44.She fainted aed at home, hit her head and was sick for a while and
:11:45. > :11:47.had trouble remembering stuff said in meetings. She had to wear a
:11:48. > :11:53.special pair of glasses for a while and I didn't know these were a
:11:54. > :11:59.thing. They are called frenal glasses. On her left eye, that is
:12:00. > :12:12.not normal glasses. That is a frenal lens. She's a Trump voting robot!
:12:13. > :12:19.They are in lighthouses? That is the original frenal lens. That causes a
:12:20. > :12:24.lighthouse to be able to project light much further it corrects
:12:25. > :12:31.double vision, which is what she had. Who the hell is that? That was
:12:32. > :12:37.the poster girl for the lens in the 1930s. Maybe she's born with it,
:12:38. > :12:42.maybe it's the frenal. Isn't that cool. She had the glasses to correct
:12:43. > :12:52.her double vision for ages. This This is about WikiLeaks. Julian much
:12:53. > :12:55.Assange has been in the news because Pamela Anderson visited him. There
:12:56. > :12:58.was a tweet from WikiLeaks saying that the internet link has been
:12:59. > :13:03.intentionally severed by a state party. We have activated the
:13:04. > :13:07.appropriate contingency plans. It sounds like they are having a party
:13:08. > :13:14.and they are like, what should we do... The conspiracy is that Pamela
:13:15. > :13:20.Anderson went in as a government agent and poisoned him. You would
:13:21. > :13:30.pick someone inconspicuous. The most famous woman in the world... In the
:13:31. > :13:33.90s! What! I was reading into his Assange's time at the Ecuadorian
:13:34. > :13:37.embassy. He is in a small section of the building. He runs two accounts.
:13:38. > :13:42.The Wikileak account. This is his other account. It's called Embassy
:13:43. > :13:51.Cat. It was a Cat that was given to him. It's interested in counter
:13:52. > :13:57.purrvelance and supposedly he tweets daily from this account. You say he
:13:58. > :14:02.lives in a small room. The ladies toilet. He had a room which was
:14:03. > :14:05.bigger. He couldn't really sleep because it was near Harrods loading
:14:06. > :14:11.bay. When the police change shifts it always woke him up. He found the
:14:12. > :14:14.quietest place in the building it was the ladies toilets. They ripped
:14:15. > :14:20.out the toilets and sinks and put a bed in there. He has a treadmill
:14:21. > :14:24.which was donated to him by Ken Loach the director who wanted to
:14:25. > :14:31.make sure he got exercise. He says he does four to five miles a day on
:14:32. > :14:37.that treadmill. He got it in December 2012. I calculated how many
:14:38. > :14:42.miles he's actually run inside the Ecuadorian embassy. He's run by
:14:43. > :14:45.5,600 miles and 7,000 miles, right. I thought, OK. How far is that
:14:46. > :14:52.actually if you were running in a straight line? What I worked out...
:14:53. > :14:58.The same distance. Oh, right. CHEERING AND APPLAUSE.
:14:59. > :15:04.It is incredibly far to run. That would mean he has run the equivalent
:15:05. > :15:08.miles if he started at the London Embassy he could have run all the
:15:09. > :15:13.way by now to Equador! .
:15:14. > :15:25.That's how far he has run in theory in that one room in the Equadorian
:15:26. > :15:28.embassy! We are half-way through the show and
:15:29. > :15:33.it is time to look at the stories that you sent in via e-mails and
:15:34. > :15:41.social media. We're going to start with you Andy. This was sent in by
:15:42. > :15:45.Laura. It is that police are looking for two female pensioners suspected
:15:46. > :15:52.of stealing a six foot high portrait of Steve McQueen from an Irish hotel
:15:53. > :15:54.with the aid of a zimmer frame! LAUGHTER
:15:55. > :15:57.Sadly, sadly, they found it was too big to fit into their car and it was
:15:58. > :15:59.discovered with slight damage outside a nearby restaurant.
:16:00. > :16:04.LAUGHTER James, what have you got? Mine came
:16:05. > :16:09.from Matthew Lowe on Twitter. It is that a group of crows in Hull have
:16:10. > :16:15.turned violent and started attacking pigeons! Due to the closure of their
:16:16. > :16:22.favourite branch of McDonald's! LAUGHTER
:16:23. > :16:26.Anna? This is from a viewer. Leicester man has admitted stealing
:16:27. > :16:30.13 blocks of cheese worth ?39 from a supermarket. He said he was not sure
:16:31. > :16:35.at the time how much cheese he had taken or what he would have done
:16:36. > :16:38.with it! LAUGHTER
:16:39. > :16:43.OK. It is time to move on to fact number three and that is my fact. My
:16:44. > :16:46.fact this week is that this week's scientists have announced that they
:16:47. > :16:52.have finally worked out why the sky goes dark at night.
:16:53. > :16:57.Is it because the sun's not there? LAUGHTER
:16:58. > :17:07.You would think that, right? That's why it goes dark. But it is not.
:17:08. > :17:12.Well, test me theory. So... 200 years ago there was a German
:17:13. > :17:17.astronomer and he had this thought which is that if we live in a
:17:18. > :17:20.universe with an infinite number of stars how come at night if it is
:17:21. > :17:24.completely coated with light from the stars, are we not just in
:17:25. > :17:29.permanent daylight? So many theories were put forward about this. A lot
:17:30. > :17:33.of people thought that one of the reasons that he might have got it
:17:34. > :17:38.wrong about the infin it star idea is that actually we're not coated as
:17:39. > :17:42.it is with stars at the moment. But very recently a research team in
:17:43. > :17:45.Nottingham has found a whole new batch of galaxies. I spoke to the
:17:46. > :17:53.guy who was part of the research team. We spoke on Skype. Here is a
:17:54. > :18:00.picture of him. Professor Christopher. This is a by-product of
:18:01. > :18:05.a major, major discovery which is there are way more gal agosies in
:18:06. > :18:12.the universe than we thought and they plug the houles holes in the
:18:13. > :18:16.night sky therefore we are completely covered in light. It
:18:17. > :18:19.reverts to another theory, the gas in the universe absorbs light, but
:18:20. > :18:23.that's the reason we have dark skies at night. That's true. It is partly
:18:24. > :18:28.the light could be absorbed by the gas or by dust. It is partly by
:18:29. > :18:33.something called red shift which means as they go further away, they
:18:34. > :18:37.appear more red and they go into the infa red part of the spectrum we
:18:38. > :18:41.can't see and because the universe is expanding, some of the stars are
:18:42. > :18:45.further away, but basically, it is because the sun's not there.
:18:46. > :18:49.APPLAUSE We do get sometimes quite
:18:50. > :18:55.interesting light at night. There was a photo taken this week and I
:18:56. > :19:04.have not heard of this before, but it is a moonbow. It is a rainbow at
:19:05. > :19:08.night. That's night-time. How cool? You get fogbows as well. The same as
:19:09. > :19:13.rain really, it is just a different kind of...
:19:14. > :19:17.LAUGHTER. There is one more development in
:19:18. > :19:23.space this week which is isn't really in space. But it is... It is
:19:24. > :19:29.a new theoretical entity in space. It is a new nation which has been
:19:30. > :19:33.founded. There is a Russian scientist launched this as a
:19:34. > :19:41.theoretical nation that's meant to cause peace and stop conflict
:19:42. > :19:47.spreading to earth. You can sign up via the website and I'm a citizen
:19:48. > :19:52.and it is pretty easy! They just need your e-mail and aning bank
:19:53. > :20:03.details for some reason! I did this as well. Anna? I haven't done it.
:20:04. > :20:06.I'm a foreigner. LAUGHTER
:20:07. > :20:11.Less than a week after this thing launched, it has more citizens than
:20:12. > :20:20.Barbados, it is pretty good. Over 400,000 people signed up. One thing
:20:21. > :20:25.in space this week they have tikanaughts. I saw a great video of
:20:26. > :20:29.the launch they did and the Chinese do something fantastic just on the
:20:30. > :20:33.count of two before they go up. I'm going to show you a video and this
:20:34. > :20:36.is of the astronauts as they are sitting inside with a five countdown
:20:37. > :20:46.going on within the shuttle. Here we go. It is, four, three, hello!
:20:47. > :20:52.LAUGHTER Just a little salute. Keep your
:20:53. > :20:58.hands on the wheels at two! Sadly, it is like no hands!
:20:59. > :21:02.So they're going up to the Chinese space station. They are going to
:21:03. > :21:07.have another space station, it will be ten times better because it is
:21:08. > :21:11.newer. There will have a robotic grappling arm, but the Pentagon have
:21:12. > :21:15.voiced concerns that China maybe testing these technologies so they
:21:16. > :21:20.might reach out and touch another country's satellite!
:21:21. > :21:31.LAUGHTER Space pervert!
:21:32. > :21:36.You would expect such a thing from the Trump administration. Just grab
:21:37. > :21:44.them by the satellite! OK, we need to move on to our final
:21:45. > :21:49.fact of the show and that is Anna. My fact, there is a four meter wide
:21:50. > :21:54.hole in Sir David Attenborough's bottom! It must be lovely having a
:21:55. > :22:01.series. Thank you for watching. This is the news this week that the RRS,
:22:02. > :22:06.Sir David Attenborough which is the ship better known as Boaty Mc Boat
:22:07. > :22:12.Face it has a four meter wide hole in the bottom. It will be a research
:22:13. > :22:16.ship that will go to the Poles, the Arctic and Antarctic and do research
:22:17. > :22:22.there over the next few years and they have built it a wet porch...
:22:23. > :22:26.That sounds disgusting! I didn't want to say David Attenborough has a
:22:27. > :22:30.wet porch! I don't know why! So this is a hole that runs from the
:22:31. > :22:33.deck right to the bottom of the ship and it means that you can conduct
:22:34. > :22:36.experiments more easily so if you need to drop equipment into the
:22:37. > :22:39.water it is a steadier environment in which to do it rather than
:22:40. > :22:43.dropping it over the sides because the water will be calmer and because
:22:44. > :22:49.it will be ploughing through ice, a lot, it will be able to cut through
:22:50. > :22:55.one meter thick ice, you can drop equipment in because all around the
:22:56. > :22:59.boat will be ice. It has a huge hole in the bottom of the boat. That's
:23:00. > :23:02.very cool. It is the big news this week that David Attenborough went
:23:03. > :23:05.down to see the ship being fitted with its keel and they do an
:23:06. > :23:11.interesting thing with the coin. They press a coin into the bottom of
:23:12. > :23:16.it. So the coin they put in was a newly be minted coin from the
:23:17. > :23:22.British Antarctic area. They are minted to be used in the Antarctic!
:23:23. > :23:26.I'm not really sure what people can buy there because they are not legal
:23:27. > :23:30.tender in the UK either. They can only be used there. Not only that,
:23:31. > :23:34.it is part of the Antarctic which we claim, but no one else in the world
:23:35. > :23:37.believes that we own! LAUGHTER
:23:38. > :23:43.Well, I think when they see this, they'll change their mind! So we
:23:44. > :23:47.should say that Boaty Mc Face has a role to play, quite an important
:23:48. > :23:52.role and David Attenborough was sweet on the Today programme, Boaty
:23:53. > :23:56.Mc Boat Face is the little submarine that they are going to allow to
:23:57. > :24:00.descend, but it is very Independent. It can go 6,000 meters down below
:24:01. > :24:04.sea level to explore the sea and it will be able to remain at sea for
:24:05. > :24:08.many months at a time and we have got a picture of the sign that was
:24:09. > :24:13.at the opening ceremony. So they are trying to get people to take it more
:24:14. > :24:18.seriously and that was the sign they put up of Boaty Mc Boat Face. They
:24:19. > :24:24.invited David Attenborough, I wonder if they invited the man who
:24:25. > :24:27.suggested Boaty Mc Boat Face. I found him on Twitter and he was
:24:28. > :24:37.invited. So that's really nice, but he said he was too busy! I think he
:24:38. > :24:44.kind of regretted it instantly because so much flak came towards
:24:45. > :24:51.him even in his bio he suggests regret because his bio line reads,
:24:52. > :24:56."The reason we can't have nice things, hashtag boaty McBoat face."
:24:57. > :25:03.A really cool thing about the people who are building this boat. They are
:25:04. > :25:07.called Cammell Laird. They are a famous boat building company. They
:25:08. > :25:10.invented the mechanism on the London Underground that doesn't crush you
:25:11. > :25:15.as you try to walk through the doorsment they had a contract to
:25:16. > :25:19.build London Underground trains in the 1920s and they came up with
:25:20. > :25:23.recycling doors which if they touched anything they'd re-open so
:25:24. > :25:29.they wouldn't crush you and it was a complete disaster at first! Fingers
:25:30. > :25:35.everywhere! No, they longed for the injuries of the past because what
:25:36. > :25:39.was happening, I read this in a book called London Underground electric
:25:40. > :25:43.train and passengers discovered its major weakness, they could use it to
:25:44. > :25:50.wait for late comers especially if the late comer happened to be an
:25:51. > :25:58.attractive lady. It caused massive delays. So people would just stand
:25:59. > :26:01.there and wait for an attractive lady. We're going to have to wrap up
:26:02. > :26:08.soon. Does anyone have anything before we do? Just one more thing
:26:09. > :26:11.about that vote. So David Attenborough came fourth in that
:26:12. > :26:17.vote, but they went for it anyway, but that's not what it is called, it
:26:18. > :26:24.is called Sir David Attenborough and Sir David Attenborough came 57th.
:26:25. > :26:34.Boats and names that beat him were, names that beat that name include I
:26:35. > :26:53.Like Big Boats Sca and I Can Not Lie. Boats scabbing back Mountain
:26:54. > :27:07.and I have collected a few of these. Usain Boat. And Ice, Ice Baby and
:27:08. > :27:11.Clifford The Big Red Boat. That's all of our facts. Just time to share
:27:12. > :27:16.with you the stories we didn't have time to get to and we'll start with
:27:17. > :27:20.James. My fact is about this billboard. It has been erected in
:27:21. > :27:32.Michigan and it is a message for Donald Trump that you can't read
:27:33. > :27:42.this, but you're scared of it! LAUGHTER
:27:43. > :27:46.Adam, what Scan a that BBC Breakfast apologised for showing a picture of
:27:47. > :27:50.an escaped gorilla instead of Nicola Sturgeon. We have got a video of it
:27:51. > :27:53.here. Coming up in the programme, we're going to be joined by Scottish
:27:54. > :28:06.First Minister, Nicola Sturgeon. We'll talk to her about plans for a
:28:07. > :28:09.second referendum on independence. LAUGHTER
:28:10. > :28:13.Andy, what have you got? The Vladimir Putin calendar 2017 has
:28:14. > :28:17.been published and it shows him respectively in a tree!
:28:18. > :28:23.LAUGHTER In a wetsuit!
:28:24. > :28:31.With a kitten. And getting into a combine harvester!
:28:32. > :28:36.APPLAUSE OK, that's it. That's all from me
:28:37. > :28:39.Annie, James and Anna will be back next week. We have been No Such
:28:40. > :28:55.Thing As The News. Goodbye. Dan has escaped from a zoo. No Such
:28:56. > :28:57.Thing As The News will be back next week at the same time. Bye-bye. Good
:28:58. > :29:06.night. It says here that you're taking over
:29:07. > :29:09.as the new host of QI. Oh, for goodness' sake!
:29:10. > :29:12.Celebrity tittle-tattle.