0:00:02 > 0:00:03Good morning, Ben.
0:00:03 > 0:00:05- Oh. Sorry. - Sorry.
0:00:05 > 0:00:08- Did I scare you?- No. - I just wanted to remind you
0:00:08 > 0:00:11of the art show that's happening tonight at the Community Centre.
0:00:11 > 0:00:13- Great.- Yeah. - Well, that sounds cool.
0:00:13 > 0:00:16That sounds like something that'll be a big success, you know?
0:00:16 > 0:00:19I mean, like everything that you, uh, that you put
0:00:19 > 0:00:21your... your paws on, your fingers.
0:00:21 > 0:00:23Leslie Knope! Ben Wyatt.
0:00:23 > 0:00:26Ben, great news. Do you remember the woman I told you about
0:00:26 > 0:00:28- from the County Commissioner's office?- Um, vaguely.
0:00:28 > 0:00:32Sure you do. Cindy Miller. Anyway, she's agreed to go out on a date with you.
0:00:32 > 0:00:34Oh, you asked her out for me?
0:00:34 > 0:00:36And you're going to love her.
0:00:36 > 0:00:39She is interesting, smart, and beautiful, inside and out.
0:00:39 > 0:00:41Inner beauty is very important.
0:00:41 > 0:00:44And outer beauty is also very important.
0:00:44 > 0:00:49I thought you had a rule about inter-government relationships.
0:00:49 > 0:00:52Oh, don't worry. Her department is completely separate from ours.
0:00:52 > 0:00:54This isn't anything like your affair with Tom Haverford.
0:00:54 > 0:00:56We weren't...you...you... Thank you.
0:00:56 > 0:00:58I love setting people up.
0:00:58 > 0:00:59Here's my secret.
0:00:59 > 0:01:02I determine someone's best qualities,
0:01:02 > 0:01:05and then I find someone else with compatible qualities.
0:01:08 > 0:01:10And I bring them together.
0:01:29 > 0:01:32Ugh. God, this sucks.
0:01:32 > 0:01:35Oh. Why don't you just go home for the rest of the day?
0:01:35 > 0:01:37I can't go home, cos I have this art-show opening
0:01:37 > 0:01:38at the Community Centre.
0:01:38 > 0:01:40And I can't stay here because I see Ben.
0:01:40 > 0:01:43And I can't date Ben because of Chris's stupid rules.
0:01:43 > 0:01:46- I feel so... - Powerless.
0:01:46 > 0:01:48Yeah. I'm like that light bulb.
0:01:48 > 0:01:52Weak, flickering, barely giving off any light,
0:01:52 > 0:01:55unable to make out with the light bulb I want to make out with.
0:01:55 > 0:01:57You know what might make you feel better?
0:01:57 > 0:02:00- A hug? - Paxil.
0:02:00 > 0:02:02- Do you want me to get you a prescription?- Ugh.
0:02:02 > 0:02:04Hey, Tom, uh, question for you.
0:02:04 > 0:02:07Do you know anyone who's looking for a roommate?
0:02:07 > 0:02:10- How hot? - I...what?
0:02:10 > 0:02:12How hot is the woman that's looking for a place to stay?
0:02:12 > 0:02:15- No, it's me. I'm looking. - Oh, come on, that's not fair.
0:02:15 > 0:02:18- You shouldn't have led me to believe it was a beautiful woman.- I didn't.
0:02:18 > 0:02:22I've been staying at the Pawnee Supersuites Motel for seven months.
0:02:22 > 0:02:23It's a charming little inn
0:02:23 > 0:02:26with wonderfully random wake-up calls,
0:02:26 > 0:02:28delightfully unstable temperatures,
0:02:28 > 0:02:31and, as of yesterday, bedbugs.
0:02:31 > 0:02:34- "Four stars!"- says nobody.
0:02:34 > 0:02:35This is awesomely perfect.
0:02:35 > 0:02:37Burly just moved in with his rich girlfriend,
0:02:37 > 0:02:39and we need help with the rent.
0:02:39 > 0:02:42- We have a couple house rules, though. - Yeah, sure. Of course.
0:02:42 > 0:02:44You can't use the front door. You have to climb in through the back window.
0:02:44 > 0:02:46No personal phone conversations.
0:02:46 > 0:02:49If you ever speak to me in Spanish, please use the formal usted.
0:02:49 > 0:02:51And no electricity after 6pm.
0:02:51 > 0:02:53She's joking!
0:02:53 > 0:02:56- OK.- You can use as much free electricity as you want. It's free.
0:02:56 > 0:02:58Couple more rules.
0:02:58 > 0:03:00If you ever watch a sad movie, you have to wear mascara
0:03:00 > 0:03:02so we can see whether or not you've been crying.
0:03:02 > 0:03:04There's no noise allowed on Mondays
0:03:04 > 0:03:06and no TV after breakfast.
0:03:06 > 0:03:09She is lying again.
0:03:09 > 0:03:11Cos it's hard to tell.
0:03:11 > 0:03:12No. We leave the TV on all day long
0:03:12 > 0:03:14so burglars think that we're home when we're not,
0:03:14 > 0:03:16which is my idea that I'm trying to patent.
0:03:16 > 0:03:19So you want to move in tonight?
0:03:22 > 0:03:25Yeah. Sure. That'd be great.
0:03:25 > 0:03:27- You want my gum? - Mm-hmm.
0:03:31 > 0:03:33Ugh. Ron, can you make the opening remarks?
0:03:33 > 0:03:36I just... I'm not in the mood.
0:03:36 > 0:03:38Neither am I, ever.
0:03:38 > 0:03:40What's wrong with you? You live for this kind of stuff.
0:03:40 > 0:03:41I don't have it in me right now.
0:03:41 > 0:03:44Ron, please, do it for me.
0:03:44 > 0:03:45Make the speech. Ron. Please. Please.
0:03:45 > 0:03:47- Give the speech, Ron. - No.
0:03:47 > 0:03:48- Yes. Please. Ron. - No.
0:03:48 > 0:03:50Please. Please give the speech. Please give the speech.
0:03:50 > 0:03:52- No, I won't. - Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes...
0:03:52 > 0:03:54- No way. - Please. Please. Please.- No.
0:03:54 > 0:03:56- Yes. Yes. Yes. - All right! Damn it, woman.
0:03:56 > 0:03:59OK, everyone, shut up!
0:03:59 > 0:04:01And look at me!
0:04:01 > 0:04:04Welcome to Visions of Nature.
0:04:04 > 0:04:06This room has several paintings in it.
0:04:06 > 0:04:07Some are big. Some are small.
0:04:07 > 0:04:10People did them, and they are here now.
0:04:10 > 0:04:11I believe that after this is over,
0:04:11 > 0:04:13they'll be hung in government buildings.
0:04:13 > 0:04:16Why the government is involved in an art show is beyond me.
0:04:16 > 0:04:18I also think it's pointless
0:04:18 > 0:04:20for a human to paint scenes of nature
0:04:20 > 0:04:23when they could just go outside and stand in it.
0:04:23 > 0:04:25Anyway, please do not misinterpret the fact
0:04:25 > 0:04:29that I am talking right now as genuine interest in art
0:04:29 > 0:04:31and attempt to discuss it with me further.
0:04:31 > 0:04:33End of speech.
0:04:34 > 0:04:36Oh, my God.
0:04:36 > 0:04:39Oh, yeah, it's a mess.
0:04:39 > 0:04:42LOUD CRUNCH
0:04:47 > 0:04:48Could you throw that in the trash can?
0:04:48 > 0:04:52I was just here, like, three weeks ago for your wedding. What happened?
0:04:52 > 0:04:54Well, I always think April's going to clean up.
0:04:54 > 0:04:56- And I never clean up. - It's cute, right?
0:04:56 > 0:04:58- No. - Yes, it is.
0:04:58 > 0:05:00MARBLES ROLLING
0:05:00 > 0:05:03Are you guys frying marbles?
0:05:03 > 0:05:05We were checking to see if the fire alarm worked.
0:05:05 > 0:05:06It doesn't.
0:05:09 > 0:05:10So for my painting,
0:05:10 > 0:05:13I chose one of my very favourite Greek myths.
0:05:13 > 0:05:17The centaur goddess Dyaphena slaying a great stag.
0:05:17 > 0:05:20- It's, uh, stunning. - It's breathtaking, Jerry.
0:05:20 > 0:05:24- Yeah. Really is. - Wow. Thanks, guys.
0:05:24 > 0:05:26Hey, Leslie, you should really come over here and look
0:05:26 > 0:05:28- at Jerry's painting.- Oh.
0:05:28 > 0:05:29Oh, my God.
0:05:31 > 0:05:33That's me. Is that me?
0:05:33 > 0:05:37What? No.
0:05:37 > 0:05:40- Oh, jeez, it does look like you. - You're just realising that now?
0:05:40 > 0:05:43That's what you see when you close your eyes at night, Jerry.
0:05:43 > 0:05:45Topless Leslie glued to a horse.
0:05:45 > 0:05:47OK, Leslie, I am just so, so sorry.
0:05:47 > 0:05:49Dyaphena, she is this powerful goddess.
0:05:49 > 0:05:51And I've been thinking a lot about powerful women.
0:05:51 > 0:05:54And subconsciously, I painted you.
0:05:54 > 0:05:56I'm sorry. I'm going to take it right down.
0:05:56 > 0:05:59No. Leave it up.
0:05:59 > 0:06:01I love it.
0:06:01 > 0:06:03I don't know how to explain it.
0:06:03 > 0:06:05Every time I look at it, I just think to myself,
0:06:05 > 0:06:08"what can't that centaur woman do?"
0:06:08 > 0:06:10Besides ride an escalator and drive a car.
0:06:10 > 0:06:16Art can be so magnificent.
0:06:16 > 0:06:17Oh, my God. The baby is Tom.
0:06:17 > 0:06:19What?
0:06:19 > 0:06:22This is easily my favourite painting ever.
0:06:22 > 0:06:24What the hell, Jerry? Look at my potbelly.
0:06:24 > 0:06:26I look like a pregnant baby! And why am I so scared?
0:06:26 > 0:06:28All right, we got to take this down now.
0:06:28 > 0:06:32It isn't going anywhere, Tom. Hello, fellow lover of the arts.
0:06:32 > 0:06:35Welcome to the painting.
0:06:35 > 0:06:38What, is that you?
0:06:38 > 0:06:41- Looks hot. - Thank you.
0:06:41 > 0:06:44This guy's in it too. He's the little fat baby.
0:06:47 > 0:06:49Oh. We've been trying to get that light fixed for months.
0:06:49 > 0:06:51- Thank you. - Thank her.
0:06:51 > 0:06:53Good morning, Tom.
0:06:53 > 0:06:54She marched into my office this morning
0:06:54 > 0:06:57and told me she wouldn't leave until I got this done.
0:06:57 > 0:06:59Hmm. Well, I'm glad someone's feeling good.
0:06:59 > 0:07:03They're going to hang that painting in a public building
0:07:03 > 0:07:05where anybody can see it.
0:07:05 > 0:07:07In one brushstroke, Jerry has killed
0:07:07 > 0:07:09the Jay-Z vibe that's taken me years to cultivate
0:07:09 > 0:07:12and replaced it with a fat, brown, baby vibe,
0:07:12 > 0:07:14which is not as cool of a vibe.
0:07:14 > 0:07:16Hey, Aphrodite, Chris needs you in his office.
0:07:17 > 0:07:19Why am I upset?
0:07:19 > 0:07:22Uh, let's start with government-funded animal porn.
0:07:22 > 0:07:24Oh, I'm not sure that's fair.
0:07:24 > 0:07:26I want it destroyed, and I want a statement from this office
0:07:26 > 0:07:29apologising for an obscene depiction of bestiality.
0:07:29 > 0:07:33- Bestiality?- It is a picture of a centaur,
0:07:33 > 0:07:35a beautiful half person, half horse.
0:07:35 > 0:07:37And how did it get like that?
0:07:37 > 0:07:40Who had sex with what and gave birth to which?
0:07:40 > 0:07:43Miss Langman, we hear you, we understand you,
0:07:43 > 0:07:45and we are going to do whatever we can
0:07:45 > 0:07:47to come to a solution.
0:07:47 > 0:07:49Destroy it.
0:07:49 > 0:07:52Destroy it? I mean, is she serious?
0:07:52 > 0:07:54Do you find this personally offensive?
0:07:54 > 0:07:56Not personally, no.
0:07:56 > 0:07:59No, personally, I enjoy a good artistic depiction of the human form.
0:07:59 > 0:08:03I've dabbled in nude sculpture. I've posed nude.
0:08:03 > 0:08:05In college, I was in a nude production of Cats.
0:08:05 > 0:08:07- Mm.- But I am not in the nude now, am I?
0:08:07 > 0:08:09Because we're in a government building.
0:08:09 > 0:08:11And that would be inappropriate,
0:08:11 > 0:08:13which is what I think Marcia is saying.
0:08:13 > 0:08:14So take care of the situation.
0:08:14 > 0:08:17That painting is not going to be destroyed.
0:08:17 > 0:08:19Every great work of art contains a message.
0:08:19 > 0:08:23And the message of this painting is, "get out of my way
0:08:23 > 0:08:27"unless you want an arrow in your ass, Marcia."
0:08:27 > 0:08:29Fork.
0:08:32 > 0:08:33Fork.
0:08:34 > 0:08:37Morning, roomie. How'd you sleep?
0:08:37 > 0:08:40Well, there were no bedbugs. Also no bed.
0:08:40 > 0:08:42I'm going to go buy a bed.
0:08:42 > 0:08:47- Fork.- I'm sorry, are you eating turkey chilli off of a Frisbee?
0:08:47 > 0:08:50It's pretty cute, right?
0:08:50 > 0:08:53No. Do you know what "cute" means?
0:08:53 > 0:08:55What have you got against turkey chilli for breakfast?
0:08:55 > 0:08:57What have you guys got against washing dishes?
0:08:57 > 0:09:00We don't have any dishes, OK? Burly took them all when he left.
0:09:00 > 0:09:02Now I bet you feel like a jerk.
0:09:02 > 0:09:05Oh, God. OK, I might need to not stay here any more.
0:09:05 > 0:09:07No. Sorry, dude.
0:09:07 > 0:09:10We already spent your money on a new Xbox 360 and more Frisbees to eat off of.
0:09:10 > 0:09:11- You got to stay. - Oh, God.
0:09:11 > 0:09:14OK. All right. Here's the deal.
0:09:14 > 0:09:15TAKEOUT BOX CRUMPLES
0:09:15 > 0:09:18We're going to clean this place up, OK?
0:09:18 > 0:09:21And then I'm going to teach you how to be adults.
0:09:21 > 0:09:24Cool. We'll get to be adults.
0:09:24 > 0:09:26Gee, golly, thanks, Mr.
0:09:27 > 0:09:29Fork.
0:09:29 > 0:09:30Hello, I'm Perd Hapley
0:09:30 > 0:09:33and welcome to Ya' heard? With Perd.
0:09:33 > 0:09:35Today's show begins now.
0:09:35 > 0:09:37Is this art, or is it pornography?
0:09:37 > 0:09:39Here to answer this question
0:09:39 > 0:09:41is Parks and Recreation deputy director Leslie Knope.
0:09:41 > 0:09:44Perd, it is a beautiful work of art.
0:09:44 > 0:09:46Governments should not be in the business of censorship,
0:09:46 > 0:09:49especially when a painting is as awesome as this one.
0:09:49 > 0:09:50But this is where the controversy
0:09:50 > 0:09:53of this story gets even more controversial.
0:09:53 > 0:09:55You are the subject of this painting,
0:09:55 > 0:09:58half woman, half horse,
0:09:58 > 0:10:00with what some would say are human breasts.
0:10:00 > 0:10:02I am not the subject.
0:10:02 > 0:10:06The subject is strong and empowered women everywhere.
0:10:06 > 0:10:09But it does look a little bit like me.
0:10:09 > 0:10:12Leslie, for our viewers at home who might not know,
0:10:12 > 0:10:13are centaurs real?
0:10:13 > 0:10:17- No. - You absolutely sure?
0:10:17 > 0:10:20OK. So you always separate your lights from your darks.
0:10:20 > 0:10:21That's racist.
0:10:21 > 0:10:24And then you get your laundry... Where's your laundry detergent?
0:10:24 > 0:10:26Right. Here we are.
0:10:26 > 0:10:29OK. This is, uh, bubble bath.
0:10:29 > 0:10:32You guys, you wash your clothes in bubble bath?
0:10:32 > 0:10:34Eh, bubble bath, clothes soap, same thing.
0:10:34 > 0:10:36No, it's not.
0:10:36 > 0:10:39Well, they both make bubbles, so...
0:10:39 > 0:10:42Also joining us today is a different person,
0:10:42 > 0:10:44pornographic film actress Brandi Maxxxx.
0:10:44 > 0:10:45Pleasure to be here.
0:10:45 > 0:10:48Brandi, you've starred in over 200 adult films,
0:10:48 > 0:10:51some which are very good. When'd you get in the business?
0:10:51 > 0:10:52- Last year. - Fantastic.
0:10:52 > 0:10:56Now, this painting right here, art or pornography?
0:10:56 > 0:10:59Perd, I think this whole debate is ridiculous.
0:10:59 > 0:11:01What Leslie and I do is obviously art.
0:11:01 > 0:11:03Oh, hang on.
0:11:03 > 0:11:06Um, there's a big difference between an oil painting
0:11:06 > 0:11:08of a Greek myth and a pornographic movie.
0:11:08 > 0:11:10- It's OK, Leslie. I got this one. - What?
0:11:10 > 0:11:12What Leslie and I want people to know is
0:11:12 > 0:11:16you should be able to have sex anywhere you want and show it anywhere you want,
0:11:16 > 0:11:19whether it's girl-on-girl action, bondage, or what have you.
0:11:19 > 0:11:21OK. Hang on.
0:11:21 > 0:11:23Pornography is very difficult to define.
0:11:23 > 0:11:25Um, in fact, it was Justice Stewart who once said,
0:11:25 > 0:11:28"I can't define pornography, but I know it when I see it."
0:11:28 > 0:11:30Brandi, how would you define pornography?
0:11:30 > 0:11:32For me, it's when the penis goes in.
0:11:37 > 0:11:39All right, we need to do some basic organisation.
0:11:39 > 0:11:42Where do you put your bills when they come?
0:11:42 > 0:11:45I read the magazines and give the rest to Andy.
0:11:45 > 0:11:49Which I organise into a pile or stack
0:11:49 > 0:11:50that I put into the freezer.
0:11:50 > 0:11:54- Why? - So they won't get lost.
0:11:55 > 0:11:57Bingo.
0:12:01 > 0:12:03OK, you have to pay these.
0:12:03 > 0:12:05Good thing I didn't lose them.
0:12:05 > 0:12:08Imagine my horror. I'm hanging upside-down with my gravity boots
0:12:08 > 0:12:09watching Perd.
0:12:09 > 0:12:11I see you with your painting
0:12:11 > 0:12:13and I am startled and disappointed.
0:12:13 > 0:12:17Well, I did not know that Brandi was going to offer me a role in her next film.
0:12:17 > 0:12:19I urge you not to take that role.
0:12:19 > 0:12:20I'm not going to take the role.
0:12:20 > 0:12:23That's good to hear, because, recently,
0:12:23 > 0:12:25you've been a little unpredictable.
0:12:25 > 0:12:26I'm sorry that I'm trying to defend
0:12:26 > 0:12:28a beautiful work of art.
0:12:28 > 0:12:30- Thank you, Leslie. - Stand down, Jerry.
0:12:30 > 0:12:32- This isn't your fight. - You've left me no choice.
0:12:32 > 0:12:35I've convened a meeting of the public arts commission,
0:12:35 > 0:12:37and we will abide by their decision.
0:12:37 > 0:12:38Fine with me.
0:12:38 > 0:12:42OK. Here is a list of errands
0:12:42 > 0:12:45and things that human adults need.
0:12:45 > 0:12:48Also, I'm giving you an advance on next month's rent.
0:12:48 > 0:12:50And I want you guys to go to Bed Bath & Beyond
0:12:50 > 0:12:52and buy everything on that list.
0:12:52 > 0:12:54Or we could buy a Wii.
0:12:54 > 0:12:56I don't know, man. Why don't you just do it?
0:12:56 > 0:12:59You can handle this. I have total faith in you.
0:12:59 > 0:13:02There's, like, a 30% chance they'll both die.
0:13:02 > 0:13:05I would just like to introduce myself. My name is Chris Traeger
0:13:05 > 0:13:08and I am a big fan of art.
0:13:11 > 0:13:14Council, I am not opposed to pornography.
0:13:14 > 0:13:17In fact, you could say I'm definitely for it.
0:13:17 > 0:13:19If I had my laptop with me right now, I would show you
0:13:19 > 0:13:22a well-hidden folder with gigabytes of proof.
0:13:22 > 0:13:27However, this thing is disgusting
0:13:27 > 0:13:30- and wrong.- Please let the record reflect
0:13:30 > 0:13:33- that the fat baby is referring to the painting.- Hey!
0:13:33 > 0:13:36I am not a fat baby. I am a small, slender man.
0:13:36 > 0:13:41Similar to actor Taye Diggs, so let the record reflect that.
0:13:41 > 0:13:44That I look like Taye Diggs.
0:13:45 > 0:13:49Every great society has always supported artistic expression.
0:13:49 > 0:13:50- The Romans.- Perverts.
0:13:50 > 0:13:52- The Greeks.- Gay perverts.
0:13:52 > 0:13:55- Two great societies in Europe. - Europeans...
0:13:55 > 0:13:59There are some members of this community that would like
0:13:59 > 0:14:02to demonise this painting, and when they do, they in fact demonise
0:14:02 > 0:14:05art itself. What is or isn't art
0:14:05 > 0:14:09is up to every free-thinking American to decide on their own.
0:14:11 > 0:14:13Uh, yeah, it's in the bag.
0:14:13 > 0:14:17We've decided that the painting should be destroyed.
0:14:17 > 0:14:19- Yeah!- Burn it!
0:14:19 > 0:14:20What, are you serious?
0:14:20 > 0:14:22You're supposed to be in favour of public art.
0:14:22 > 0:14:24Yeah, well, there are nipples in it,
0:14:24 > 0:14:27so it just feels like we ought to be safe and destroy it.
0:14:29 > 0:14:31So how do you want to do this?
0:14:31 > 0:14:34Burn it publicly or burn it privately, and I put the footage on my blog or...?
0:14:34 > 0:14:36You've made your point, OK?
0:14:36 > 0:14:38Look, this painting is very important to me.
0:14:38 > 0:14:40It doesn't need to hang in a government building.
0:14:40 > 0:14:43Just let me take it home, and I'll keep it there.
0:14:43 > 0:14:45What do you say?
0:14:45 > 0:14:47I say this painting is going to burn,
0:14:47 > 0:14:50first here, then in hell.
0:14:50 > 0:14:53No.
0:14:53 > 0:14:57- Hey! Come back here! - Make me, stag! I am Dyaphena!
0:14:57 > 0:14:59First things first, oven mitts.
0:14:59 > 0:15:01Where are the oven mitts?
0:15:01 > 0:15:04Oh, my God. They have all the As-Seen-On-TV stuff!
0:15:04 > 0:15:07- Nuh-uh! - Shake weight, Iron Gym...
0:15:07 > 0:15:10- Miracle Hand Repair, Big Top cookie, Pillow Pet, Slap Chop.- Honey.
0:15:10 > 0:15:14- Oh, my God. - Honey, honey, listen to me.
0:15:14 > 0:15:16Get it all.
0:15:16 > 0:15:18Grab everything that we've seen it on TV
0:15:18 > 0:15:20and put it in this cart right now.
0:15:20 > 0:15:22Iron gym! I am going to get so buff.
0:15:22 > 0:15:24Oh, my God. Marshmallow shooter.
0:15:24 > 0:15:25Marshmallow shooter! Get two.
0:15:25 > 0:15:28- Wait, what about the Magic Bullet? - Yeah. I've seen that.
0:15:28 > 0:15:31RAPID KNOCKING
0:15:31 > 0:15:33- Oh, hi. - Hi.
0:15:33 > 0:15:35I was at a meeting around the corner,
0:15:35 > 0:15:38and some people wanted to destroy this painting,
0:15:38 > 0:15:39so I brought it here.
0:15:39 > 0:15:41Where's Andy and April?
0:15:41 > 0:15:43They're out shopping.
0:15:43 > 0:15:48- What are you doing here? - I moved into the spare room.
0:15:48 > 0:15:49Really?
0:15:49 > 0:15:51- Yeah. - Huh.
0:15:51 > 0:15:55- Can I come in? - Yeah. Yeah. Sure. Of course.
0:15:55 > 0:15:57Why do they want to destroy it?
0:15:57 > 0:16:00Well, it's a painting of me as a centaur.
0:16:00 > 0:16:02- OK. - And it's a nude.
0:16:02 > 0:16:03Oh.
0:16:03 > 0:16:06Just basically, like, the chestal region.
0:16:06 > 0:16:09- Uh-huh.- Mostly. You don't have to look at it if you don't want to.
0:16:09 > 0:16:10- No, no, no. - It's very classy.
0:16:10 > 0:16:12- Yeah, no, I'm sure it is. - PHONE RINGS
0:16:12 > 0:16:14Oh, man. It's Chris. Got to take this.
0:16:14 > 0:16:16- OK. - Hi, Chris.
0:16:16 > 0:16:18Leslie Knope, you need to bring that painting back.
0:16:18 > 0:16:20- What painting?- Leslie, you have the painting,
0:16:20 > 0:16:22and you need to bring it back in.
0:16:22 > 0:16:25I think I've been pretty fair with you and I'm starting to feel angry.
0:16:25 > 0:16:27And I don't like feeling angry. My heart is racing.
0:16:27 > 0:16:29- It's going literally 45 beats a minute.- I'm sorry.
0:16:29 > 0:16:31If I could just explain to you my point of view...
0:16:31 > 0:16:34You will bring that painting in tomorrow morning and surrender it
0:16:34 > 0:16:37to Marcia Langman, and that's that. Do you understand me, madam?
0:16:37 > 0:16:39Yes.
0:16:41 > 0:16:43Mighty Putty!
0:16:47 > 0:16:50What are we doing? We didn't get a single thing that Ben told us to.
0:16:50 > 0:16:52Sure we did. We got the Marshmallow shooter.
0:16:52 > 0:16:55That's... I don't think that's on the list.
0:16:55 > 0:16:57- But I want it. - I want it too.
0:16:57 > 0:17:00But I also kind of want my own fork...
0:17:00 > 0:17:02Just cos you eat really slow,
0:17:02 > 0:17:05which is cute, but also super annoying.
0:17:05 > 0:17:08- Fine. - What? What's wrong?
0:17:08 > 0:17:11Nothing. It's just adults are boring, and I hate them.
0:17:11 > 0:17:13And I don't want to buy all this stupid, boring,
0:17:13 > 0:17:16- adult stuff and become boring adults. - Hey, listen to me.
0:17:16 > 0:17:19Yes, we're going to get a dish rack, and shower curtains,
0:17:19 > 0:17:22and a cutting board. But if you think for one second
0:17:22 > 0:17:24I'm not also going to get that marshmallow shooter
0:17:24 > 0:17:28so that I can shoot you in the face with marshmallows
0:17:28 > 0:17:32when you're asleep, then you're the dumbest woman I know.
0:17:32 > 0:17:34You're going to make me cry.
0:17:36 > 0:17:38You're a level-headed person. What do I do here?
0:17:38 > 0:17:40Well, I don't know.
0:17:40 > 0:17:43I mean, it is one of the basic rules of government that you shouldn't offend people.
0:17:43 > 0:17:45Yeah. I guess you're right.
0:17:45 > 0:17:51I just... I'm so annoyed by all these rules lately.
0:17:51 > 0:17:52Me too.
0:17:52 > 0:17:55Hey, Leslie. What are you doing here?
0:17:55 > 0:17:58Hey. Um, well, I, um, I stole a painting.
0:17:58 > 0:18:01And, um, I was hoping you guys would help me hide it.
0:18:01 > 0:18:03I like it. It's very simple.
0:18:03 > 0:18:06No, it's on the other side.
0:18:06 > 0:18:09Oh, my God. Is that you as a naked horse?
0:18:09 > 0:18:11Does it look like me? I don't even...
0:18:11 > 0:18:14Leslie, I mean, not to be inappropriate or anything,
0:18:14 > 0:18:17cos you're my boss and my friend, but I would totally hit that.
0:18:17 > 0:18:19- So would I. - You guys are sweet.
0:18:19 > 0:18:22OK. I should go and hit the road with this.
0:18:22 > 0:18:24- And, um... - OK.
0:18:24 > 0:18:26- I'll see you later. - Bye.
0:18:26 > 0:18:27Bye, Leslie.
0:18:27 > 0:18:29So how'd we do?
0:18:29 > 0:18:32I don't know. Does this answer your question?
0:18:38 > 0:18:41No. Did you buy plates?
0:18:41 > 0:18:42Oh, plates.
0:18:45 > 0:18:47Leslie, what are you doing?
0:18:47 > 0:18:48Say goodbye to Dyaphena.
0:18:48 > 0:18:51I have to turn her over to stupid Marcia Langman.
0:18:51 > 0:18:54- Really? Oh. - What?
0:18:54 > 0:18:57I mean, to be honest, that seems like the kind of thing I would do.
0:18:57 > 0:19:00And I didn't think you would give in.
0:19:03 > 0:19:05I'm glad you finally came to your senses.
0:19:05 > 0:19:08I know that's not an easy journey for you to make.
0:19:08 > 0:19:12Let's take a look at it first, shall we?
0:19:12 > 0:19:14Whoa! It looks amazing!
0:19:14 > 0:19:17I had the artist paint over the original.
0:19:17 > 0:19:19- Feel free to destroy it. - No!
0:19:19 > 0:19:22But I think you'll find no-one could possibly be offended.
0:19:24 > 0:19:26There were many kinds of Greek goddesses.
0:19:26 > 0:19:28Some were lovers. Some were warriors.
0:19:28 > 0:19:32And some were tricksters.
0:19:34 > 0:19:36How did your date with Cindy go?
0:19:36 > 0:19:38Uh, you know, she wasn't really my type.
0:19:38 > 0:19:40She's a tall brunette. You always like tall brunettes.
0:19:40 > 0:19:43- Well, not exclusively. - Historically, yes, exclusively.
0:19:43 > 0:19:45He said he didn't like her, so it's over.
0:19:45 > 0:19:47OK, well, I'm going to keep trying,
0:19:47 > 0:19:49- because you are incredible. - Thank you.
0:19:49 > 0:19:51And you deserve someone amazing
0:19:51 > 0:19:54and smart and beautiful.
0:19:54 > 0:19:57- Thank you. - A real goddess.
0:19:57 > 0:19:59- Exactly.- Mm.
0:20:00 > 0:20:02You look like Enrique Iglesias.
0:20:02 > 0:20:04- Just wish I had more time. - Why?
0:20:04 > 0:20:05This is amazing.
0:20:05 > 0:20:08It looks like me, and I look awesome.
0:20:08 > 0:20:12Is your penis between the front arms or the back legs?
0:20:12 > 0:20:13Yeah, where's your penis?
0:20:13 > 0:20:15Damn it, Jerry!