Proper Little Family

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0:00:02 > 0:00:03OK, so we slept together! So what?!

0:00:03 > 0:00:06No! I'm not living in a camp site!

0:00:06 > 0:00:09No, it's a static caravan park.

0:00:09 > 0:00:11I'm looking for a flat.

0:00:11 > 0:00:13- Take a card.- Thanks...

0:00:13 > 0:00:14Isabel.

0:00:26 > 0:00:28GLASS SQUEAKS

0:00:34 > 0:00:35Ugh!

0:00:36 > 0:00:37I hate this, Keith!

0:00:38 > 0:00:41It'll get better. We're just settling in.

0:00:41 > 0:00:44I don't want to settle in. Can't you smell the damp?

0:00:44 > 0:00:46That's the fresh air outside.

0:00:46 > 0:00:48Fresh air doesn't smell like dead frogs.

0:00:48 > 0:00:50Oh, just Febreze it.

0:00:50 > 0:00:52It's the smell of misery, Keith.

0:00:52 > 0:00:54You can't Febreze that.

0:01:00 > 0:01:02Don't rain on my parade, Sandra!

0:01:05 > 0:01:07- Morning!- Morning!

0:01:09 > 0:01:10Hello!

0:01:10 > 0:01:13KEITH SINGS MERRILY

0:01:13 > 0:01:15Whoa! Hey! Yours!

0:01:15 > 0:01:17- CRASHING - Sorry.

0:01:23 > 0:01:25- You all right, Niall? You winning?- Aye.

0:01:25 > 0:01:27Do you want me to have a go?

0:01:31 > 0:01:35Ah, there you go, that's it.

0:01:36 > 0:01:38Oh, great. Cheers, Keith.

0:01:38 > 0:01:40It's all right.

0:01:40 > 0:01:43Ahh, I've a ton of gravel to spread over the kiddies' playing area.

0:01:43 > 0:01:47Don't know where it goes. Little bastards must eat it.

0:01:47 > 0:01:49I'll give you a hand if you want. Got nothing else on.

0:01:49 > 0:01:52Great! I'll pay you.

0:01:52 > 0:01:54Great!

0:01:54 > 0:01:55Do you want to drive?

0:01:57 > 0:01:58Yeah!

0:01:58 > 0:02:00Woo-hoo!

0:02:05 > 0:02:06KEITH GIGGLES

0:02:06 > 0:02:08Woo!

0:02:15 > 0:02:16SHE EXHALES WEARILY

0:02:16 > 0:02:18- See ya later!- Definitely!

0:02:26 > 0:02:28- All right? - I'm better than all right!

0:02:28 > 0:02:29Good.

0:02:29 > 0:02:33Cos I was worried when I saw that girl trying to eat your face.

0:02:33 > 0:02:36Aww, seeing me with another woman's very upsetting for you, innit?

0:02:36 > 0:02:38Not in the way that you think.

0:02:38 > 0:02:42Lorraine's amazing! She totally gets me!

0:02:42 > 0:02:45She said there was something about me.

0:02:45 > 0:02:46SHE SCOFFS

0:02:46 > 0:02:50And did she, erm, specify what this thing was?

0:02:50 > 0:02:51Uh-uh.

0:02:51 > 0:02:56But I tell you what. She is going to find out! Mmm!

0:02:56 > 0:02:58She is like a one-stop shop for happiness!

0:02:58 > 0:03:00She's even fixed me up with a job.

0:03:00 > 0:03:03- Really?- Yeah! Her dad owns a chain of sports shops.

0:03:03 > 0:03:05She thinks I'm management material.

0:03:05 > 0:03:08That makes no sense.

0:03:08 > 0:03:12Of course it does. Your mind's just addled with jealousy.

0:03:12 > 0:03:15But if you love something, Beth, you've just got to set it free

0:03:15 > 0:03:19- and let it get off with sexually-assertive women.- Ugh!

0:03:19 > 0:03:21So, what are we looking for?

0:03:21 > 0:03:23- Something quite cheap. - At least a two bed.

0:03:23 > 0:03:25- Yeah, Mike might stay over. - Because Mum might stay over.

0:03:25 > 0:03:28- Why would your mum need to stay over?- Why would Mike need to stay?

0:03:29 > 0:03:32- Maybe just a one bed.- One's fine.

0:03:33 > 0:03:35OK, so preferably one bed.

0:03:35 > 0:03:37Oh, you both must be so excited.

0:03:37 > 0:03:41Yeah, I can't wait to get some space!

0:03:41 > 0:03:42Of our own.

0:03:42 > 0:03:45Yeah, we're going to be a proper little family!

0:03:45 > 0:03:47Oh, he can't wait! Isn't he sweet?

0:03:47 > 0:03:49We're going to be just like my mum and dad.

0:03:49 > 0:03:52Well, not EXACTLY like your mum and dad.

0:03:54 > 0:03:58Settling in? I'll bloody settle him in.

0:03:59 > 0:04:01Coo-ee!

0:04:02 > 0:04:04Terrible weather!

0:04:04 > 0:04:06SHE LAUGHS THEN SIGHS

0:04:06 > 0:04:07Are you here for long?

0:04:07 > 0:04:10- Oh, God, hope not!- Huh?

0:04:10 > 0:04:13Er, we'll see how the weather goes.

0:04:13 > 0:04:15We're lucky, we can be flexible with dates.

0:04:15 > 0:04:19My husband Paul's joining me later.

0:04:19 > 0:04:21- Depending on work.- Ah, right.

0:04:21 > 0:04:24Paul and I love our car-avan.

0:04:24 > 0:04:26Car-avan?

0:04:26 > 0:04:28It's very much a second home.

0:04:28 > 0:04:32Third home, if you count the RV. Which I think you have to.

0:04:33 > 0:04:34Oh, yes.

0:04:34 > 0:04:36It's a big one! Won't say how much.

0:04:36 > 0:04:39Almost 22,000.

0:04:39 > 0:04:41So worth it!

0:04:41 > 0:04:43Well, I better be getting on.

0:04:43 > 0:04:45Well, nice to meet a fellow holiday-maker!

0:04:47 > 0:04:50I, erm, I try and steer clear of the residentials.

0:04:52 > 0:04:54Residentials?

0:04:54 > 0:04:56- The permanent residents.- Oh!

0:04:56 > 0:04:58Not one of us, if you get my drift.

0:04:58 > 0:05:00We should stick together.

0:05:00 > 0:05:04In fact, why don't you come round for lunch tomorrow?

0:05:04 > 0:05:05We're barbecuing.

0:05:05 > 0:05:08Bring your...husband?

0:05:08 > 0:05:09Keit'.

0:05:09 > 0:05:11Keith? Ah...

0:05:11 > 0:05:15I'm sure Paul would love you both to come!

0:05:15 > 0:05:17If he can make it. Depending on work.

0:05:17 > 0:05:20Well, I will check our schedule

0:05:20 > 0:05:23as, uh, Keith's also very busy.

0:05:23 > 0:05:25- You know how it is! - Shall we say three o'clock?

0:05:26 > 0:05:28Oh, OK...

0:05:29 > 0:05:32I'll make sure the real flame fire's up and running.

0:05:32 > 0:05:34It was 400, but...

0:05:34 > 0:05:36So worth it.

0:05:36 > 0:05:37Exactly.

0:05:38 > 0:05:40- Toodle-oo!- Cheerio.

0:05:48 > 0:05:49Now...

0:05:49 > 0:05:51my little girl tells me you're a good bloke.

0:05:52 > 0:05:55Well, obviously I've gotta check you out for myself.

0:05:55 > 0:05:58- Of course.- So, what sort of experience have you had?

0:05:58 > 0:06:01Well, you know, we've only been seeing each other for a little while,

0:06:01 > 0:06:04but I say so far, it's been excellent.

0:06:05 > 0:06:08I mean have you had any retail experience?

0:06:10 > 0:06:13Retail! Yes, loads.

0:06:13 > 0:06:15Not so much from the selling side of things,

0:06:15 > 0:06:17but I have had lots of purchasing experience.

0:06:19 > 0:06:22- You're tellin' me you've been shopping?- Yes!

0:06:22 > 0:06:25And I think that I can transfer those skills into a more

0:06:25 > 0:06:29sales-based format moving forward.

0:06:29 > 0:06:30Right.

0:06:34 > 0:06:36Funny guy!

0:06:39 > 0:06:41HE LAUGHS

0:06:45 > 0:06:47Wow! Look at the size of it!

0:06:47 > 0:06:50- Yeah, look at it.- It's big.

0:06:50 > 0:06:52Mm-hm, bigger than a caravan.

0:06:54 > 0:06:57It's a lovely space for a family. And you can grow into it,

0:06:57 > 0:07:00well, at least until maybe Emily has a little brother or a sister!

0:07:00 > 0:07:03- Oh, OK, let's not get ahead of ourselves!- I really like it.

0:07:03 > 0:07:06I'm sorry, I just... It just feels really, really claustrophobic!

0:07:06 > 0:07:09OK, fine, I'll take you to the next property.

0:07:11 > 0:07:12Here we are.

0:07:14 > 0:07:16Oh...

0:07:16 > 0:07:17This is nice.

0:07:17 > 0:07:21Yeah... I'm not sure.

0:07:21 > 0:07:22What's wrong with it?

0:07:22 > 0:07:25Er, I'm just... I'm not getting that feeling.

0:07:25 > 0:07:27You know when you don't get the feeling.

0:07:27 > 0:07:29Hmm, uh-huh, OK.

0:07:29 > 0:07:32Also, not really sure about this area, it seems a little bit dead.

0:07:32 > 0:07:36Are there any, like, shops nearby or...?

0:07:36 > 0:07:39Yes, there's a great little run of shops just round the corner.

0:07:39 > 0:07:42And a supermarket, two delis, couple of cafes

0:07:42 > 0:07:44and a lovely little bar, it's just next to the park.

0:07:44 > 0:07:47Oh, and there's that little cinema we passed.

0:07:47 > 0:07:48Oh, yeah, by the tapas place.

0:07:48 > 0:07:50Oh, well, there you go, then!

0:07:50 > 0:07:53There's going to be hundreds of people going up and down that high street

0:07:53 > 0:07:55day and night to use all the great facilities.

0:07:55 > 0:07:57I'm sorry. No.

0:08:01 > 0:08:04Well, if she's not getting the feeling...

0:08:04 > 0:08:05I'm getting a feeling.

0:08:07 > 0:08:09SCRAP CLATTERS

0:08:09 > 0:08:10Cheers for that, Keith.

0:08:12 > 0:08:16If you want work, I've got a job here helping out.

0:08:16 > 0:08:17What, on the site?

0:08:17 > 0:08:19Yeah. If you can handle the commute!

0:08:19 > 0:08:22Yeah, I'd love that! When can I start?

0:08:22 > 0:08:25Well, you can cover tonight if you'd like? I've got a hot date.

0:08:25 > 0:08:29- Right.- Online date. You know, chatting.

0:08:29 > 0:08:32- Oh, yeah, nice! - American woman.- Cool!

0:08:32 > 0:08:33Prisoner.

0:08:33 > 0:08:35Felony murder.

0:08:35 > 0:08:37(Oh, that's)...lovely.

0:08:40 > 0:08:44Sorry, so, this job, what exactly would it entail?

0:08:44 > 0:08:45Oh, bugger all, really.

0:08:45 > 0:08:48Just cover the phone in case somebody needs a fuse changing

0:08:48 > 0:08:50or their shoelaces tying.

0:08:50 > 0:08:52So, I've just got to, like, sit in the office?

0:08:52 > 0:08:54Well, sit where you like. I mean, this is the office.

0:08:54 > 0:08:56It's a duty mobile.

0:08:56 > 0:08:59Just keep it with you and be on call if anything comes up.

0:08:59 > 0:09:01Oh, right, I'm just like a general dogsbody?

0:09:03 > 0:09:07Well, deputy dogsbody, yeah.

0:09:07 > 0:09:08Cool.

0:09:12 > 0:09:14FRONT DOOR OPENS

0:09:14 > 0:09:18- Get in, get in! Get, get...! - What's wrong?- Oh, God!

0:09:18 > 0:09:21We've been invited to a barbecue by one of the bloody neighbours.

0:09:21 > 0:09:24- Oh, magic, I love...! - No, no, don't you dare.

0:09:24 > 0:09:26Don't you dare enjoy yourself.

0:09:26 > 0:09:30She thinks we're on holiday! It's so humiliating!

0:09:30 > 0:09:33And you put us here, Keith, you made this happen,

0:09:33 > 0:09:35and you do nothing to help us!

0:09:35 > 0:09:37Actually, I've got a job.

0:09:39 > 0:09:41I'm an assistant manager.

0:09:41 > 0:09:43That's fantastic!

0:09:43 > 0:09:45- Assistant manager of what?- The site!

0:09:45 > 0:09:50- What site?- This site. I'm assistant site manager.

0:09:50 > 0:09:52It's dead lucky, cos it's only open to residents!

0:09:52 > 0:09:54Oh, no, no, I don't want to be a resident.

0:09:54 > 0:09:57I can't live here! Tell them, tell them you're not taking it!

0:09:57 > 0:09:59No! I have got a job.

0:09:59 > 0:10:00We have got a place to live,

0:10:00 > 0:10:03and we've got no worries about debts and bailiffs.

0:10:03 > 0:10:04We have everything we need, Sandra.

0:10:04 > 0:10:09We've got space, greenery, free table tennis, off peak.

0:10:09 > 0:10:12It's paradise. And you'd see that if you weren't such a snob.

0:10:12 > 0:10:16Oh! I am not a snob!

0:10:16 > 0:10:18It's just a big adjustment!

0:10:18 > 0:10:20And I keep trying to move the furniture, Keith,

0:10:20 > 0:10:24and I can't cos it's all fixed to the wall! I'm not used to it!

0:10:24 > 0:10:27Oh, hey, hey. Come on, it's all right.

0:10:27 > 0:10:33OK, we don't have to tell her that we live here. Right?

0:10:33 > 0:10:37But that is only because I love...

0:10:38 > 0:10:39..barbecues.

0:10:40 > 0:10:42SANDRA SOBS

0:10:45 > 0:10:48So you buzz the customers in, take their order number,

0:10:48 > 0:10:51- get the stuff from the back and take their money.- Right.

0:10:51 > 0:10:53Money goes in the cash box.

0:10:53 > 0:10:56End of the day you give it to me...

0:10:56 > 0:10:58- or Big Tim.- Who's Big Tim? - You don't need to know.

0:10:58 > 0:11:01I just thought, if I have to give him the money...

0:11:01 > 0:11:04He'll be a big guy, and he'll say his name is Tim.

0:11:04 > 0:11:06Got it!

0:11:07 > 0:11:10- Here's your first week's wages upfront.- Cool!

0:11:10 > 0:11:12And obviously keep it quiet.

0:11:12 > 0:11:15(Good lad.)

0:11:15 > 0:11:17Right, I'll get the rest of the stuff loaded in, then.

0:11:17 > 0:11:19Right and I'll just start unpacking it, shall I?

0:11:19 > 0:11:21No.

0:11:22 > 0:11:24We don't unpack the stock.

0:11:24 > 0:11:26We NEVER unpack the stock.

0:11:26 > 0:11:28- (Clear?)- (Clear! Yep!)

0:11:28 > 0:11:30I think he gets it, Dad.

0:11:35 > 0:11:38After yesterday's viewings, I thought I'd open up our search.

0:11:38 > 0:11:40We're really just looking for something temporary.

0:11:40 > 0:11:43Well, not that temporary.

0:11:43 > 0:11:45Well, until we sort out what we are doing...

0:11:45 > 0:11:47long term.

0:11:47 > 0:11:50Erm, what's the shortest lease that you can get

0:11:50 > 0:11:53with the shortest period of notice?

0:11:53 > 0:11:56Er, something like a rolling one-month lease?

0:11:56 > 0:11:58But you'd have to commit for at least the first three months.

0:11:58 > 0:12:01Ah, I suppose I could do that.

0:12:02 > 0:12:05- What do you think? - It is a great property.

0:12:05 > 0:12:06What about the schools?

0:12:06 > 0:12:09What about the schools? I'm sure the schools are fine!

0:12:09 > 0:12:10What you think of as a good school

0:12:10 > 0:12:12and what I think are different things.

0:12:12 > 0:12:15My school was fine.

0:12:15 > 0:12:16Is that why you dropped out?

0:12:16 > 0:12:19No. You're why I dropped out.

0:12:23 > 0:12:28OK, so, why don't I check on catchment areas for nurseries?

0:12:28 > 0:12:30Thank you. Thank you, Isabel, yes.

0:12:30 > 0:12:32It's nice to see somebody thinking about Emily's future.

0:12:32 > 0:12:35And by future I assume you mean the next three months?

0:12:35 > 0:12:38Because that seems to be as far as you can commit to.

0:12:38 > 0:12:42Forgive me, for wanting to actually make a choice,

0:12:42 > 0:12:44rather than just taking the first thing on offer!

0:12:44 > 0:12:47Why are we even doing this?

0:12:47 > 0:12:49Just be honest, Laura, you don't want to move in with me, do you?

0:12:49 > 0:12:55- I do! It's just this obviously isn't the right place.- Really?

0:12:55 > 0:12:57And what exactly is wrong with it?

0:12:57 > 0:13:00Well...that view for starters!

0:13:03 > 0:13:06Happy now?!

0:13:06 > 0:13:07- No.- No!

0:13:07 > 0:13:10Because the only problem you have with these properties

0:13:10 > 0:13:13is that I'm in them! That's why you can't commit, isn't it?

0:13:13 > 0:13:16SHE SIGHS WEARILY

0:13:16 > 0:13:19Right, fine, I'm sorry. I'm not like you.

0:13:20 > 0:13:24I don't want to just move in and start playing happy families.

0:13:24 > 0:13:25I wasn't playing!

0:13:29 > 0:13:32Jamie, why don't you go and have another look at the exterior?

0:13:33 > 0:13:38Fine! I'm going to go and stand in the double-sized parking space!

0:13:42 > 0:13:46So, Laura, I'm sensing it's not entirely about the property.

0:13:46 > 0:13:48It's just...

0:13:48 > 0:13:52- Jamie's great, but... - It's none of my business.

0:13:52 > 0:13:57But in my job I see lots of people rushing into moving in together,

0:13:57 > 0:13:59and three months later I'm remarketing the flat.

0:13:59 > 0:14:02That's what I'm worried about. Maybe we're not ready.

0:14:03 > 0:14:05Do you think we're ready?

0:14:05 > 0:14:08Jamie seems a great guy.

0:14:08 > 0:14:10But there's no point rushing into anything if you're not sure.

0:14:20 > 0:14:22Sorry about that.

0:14:22 > 0:14:24- I just...- It's fine.

0:14:24 > 0:14:25I'll come back.

0:14:25 > 0:14:29Maybe just let things cool off for a while.

0:14:29 > 0:14:30Let her work things out.

0:14:30 > 0:14:34- Do you think?- The last thing you want is to put more pressure

0:14:34 > 0:14:35on a fragile relationship.

0:14:37 > 0:14:40I guess that's what it is. A fragile relationship.

0:14:41 > 0:14:44I'm really sorry.

0:14:44 > 0:14:47For what it's worth, I think you're great.

0:14:47 > 0:14:48I'd move in with you.

0:14:55 > 0:14:57God, I've got to get to work. Erm...

0:14:57 > 0:14:59You go, I'll lock up and tell Laura.

0:15:00 > 0:15:03- Er...- You can text her when you get to work.

0:15:03 > 0:15:04It's fine, just go.

0:15:04 > 0:15:06OK. Look, thanks, Isabel.

0:15:15 > 0:15:17Where's Jamie?

0:15:17 > 0:15:19He had to go. Something about his lunch break.

0:15:19 > 0:15:20He just left?!

0:15:22 > 0:15:24Oh, bloody hell!

0:15:26 > 0:15:29Oh, maybe let him cool off a bit. He seemed pretty annoyed.

0:15:32 > 0:15:34We're just not on the same page with this.

0:15:34 > 0:15:36Yeah, it's a shame.

0:15:37 > 0:15:39I had this great one bed, it's just come up.

0:15:39 > 0:15:42Not so much of a Jamie place, but you would have loved it!

0:15:42 > 0:15:44- Really?- Yeah, it's going to fly off the market.

0:15:45 > 0:15:48But I suppose there's no point in viewing it now.

0:15:48 > 0:15:53Well, there's no harm in having a look, is there?

0:15:53 > 0:15:54No! Course not!

0:15:55 > 0:15:56Great!

0:15:56 > 0:15:58Come along, don't be shy!

0:15:59 > 0:16:01And here we are.

0:16:04 > 0:16:06Wow, look at this place.

0:16:06 > 0:16:09You can never have too much scalloped fabric I say.

0:16:10 > 0:16:12Apparently not.

0:16:13 > 0:16:17The scent you're getting. Potpourri.

0:16:17 > 0:16:18Locally sourced.

0:16:19 > 0:16:21What the...? Oh.

0:16:23 > 0:16:27That's based on one from the palace of Versailles.

0:16:27 > 0:16:31Oh, right yeah. Really dominates the room, doesn't it?

0:16:31 > 0:16:33Oh, thank you!

0:16:34 > 0:16:36Do come through!

0:16:40 > 0:16:42Have you ever seen anything like that?

0:16:43 > 0:16:46- Good God!- Isn't it?!

0:16:46 > 0:16:50Oh! That's my double oven! I bake my own bread.

0:16:50 > 0:16:52- Fockassia. - Oh, you mean focaccia?

0:16:54 > 0:16:56Not if you bake it the authentic Spanish way, no.

0:16:59 > 0:17:02What's going on with your display?

0:17:02 > 0:17:05Er, I'm just showing a range of sporting activities.

0:17:05 > 0:17:07This one's a sprinter in his blocks.

0:17:07 > 0:17:11This guys doing the backstroke in the 4x400m medley, actually.

0:17:11 > 0:17:14- And this one's the referee. - Right.

0:17:14 > 0:17:16I was going to spread them further apart

0:17:16 > 0:17:18but we're a bit limited on space so, er...

0:17:18 > 0:17:20Yeah, this is a weird shop.

0:17:20 > 0:17:23No, no, Lorraine said her dad's got a very unique model.

0:17:23 > 0:17:26All high-end, pre-ordered stuff.

0:17:26 > 0:17:29Ahh, sh, I'll just get that.

0:17:32 > 0:17:34Hello, sir, how can I help you today?

0:17:36 > 0:17:39One second, let me just get that for you.

0:17:43 > 0:17:46- Oh, urghh!- Oh!

0:17:46 > 0:17:47Oh, watch your back.

0:17:50 > 0:17:52There we are, sir, there's your order.

0:17:52 > 0:17:53Thank you very much.

0:17:53 > 0:17:56And would you care to fill out a customer response form,

0:17:56 > 0:17:58just to help us improve our services?

0:18:08 > 0:18:10So what do you actually do, Keith?

0:18:12 > 0:18:13Hmm...

0:18:14 > 0:18:16Keith works in aggregates.

0:18:17 > 0:18:19Right, what does that entail?

0:18:20 > 0:18:23What doesn't it entail?

0:18:23 > 0:18:24Yes, but what does it entail?

0:18:26 > 0:18:28Well, aggregates.

0:18:30 > 0:18:35Spreading, distributions, supply, spreading stuff out.

0:18:38 > 0:18:39Sounds fascinating.

0:18:47 > 0:18:50Yes, Keith's employment has definitely allowed us

0:18:50 > 0:18:53to be where we are today.

0:18:53 > 0:18:55Hmm, course, Sandra loves coming here.

0:18:57 > 0:19:00Well, it certainly is a nice place you have.

0:19:00 > 0:19:02For that grade of car-avan.

0:19:05 > 0:19:07Oh and we have the house in France!

0:19:11 > 0:19:13Yep! French place.

0:19:15 > 0:19:18Oh. And where is that?

0:19:20 > 0:19:22- West.- South

0:19:22 > 0:19:23- BOTH:- South-West.

0:19:26 > 0:19:28Would that put you in the Dordogne?

0:19:29 > 0:19:32Does it! Hm, every time.

0:19:39 > 0:19:42- What's a Dordogne?- Never mind.

0:19:42 > 0:19:45You don't think this whole set up is a bit weird?

0:19:45 > 0:19:47Well, it's, it's not perfect.

0:19:47 > 0:19:49I do not think you're selling sportswear.

0:19:49 > 0:19:53Beth! You can't open the stock. I'm under very strict instructions!

0:19:53 > 0:19:56- I'm opening the stock. - No, Beth! It's for customers only!

0:19:56 > 0:20:01Oh, OK then! I want to buy some trainers.

0:20:01 > 0:20:05- We don't have them in your size! - Oh, these sound about right!

0:20:05 > 0:20:08- Beth!- No, Mike!

0:20:10 > 0:20:13- Oh, my God!- Bingo!

0:20:13 > 0:20:16This is not the direction I want to take the company!

0:20:16 > 0:20:18We're very healthy lifestyle orientated.

0:20:18 > 0:20:21I'm going to have to talk to Terry!

0:20:21 > 0:20:23He's a criminal! You're a criminal!

0:20:23 > 0:20:26I'm going to talk to Lorraine. Beth, you watch the shop!

0:20:28 > 0:20:31- It is really lovely.- Isn't it?

0:20:31 > 0:20:34I can just picture it, you know, you and Emily, here.

0:20:36 > 0:20:41I do have a second viewing this afternoon. They're very keen.

0:20:41 > 0:20:43- Well, I want to help you. - I'll take it!- Really?

0:20:43 > 0:20:48- Yeah, yeah!- OK, great!- OK.

0:20:55 > 0:20:56Do you need to get that?

0:20:56 > 0:20:59No.. It's... It's fine.

0:21:00 > 0:21:03- Great, well, let's go and sort the paperwork!- OK!

0:21:05 > 0:21:06OK...

0:21:20 > 0:21:22MECHANISM GURGLES

0:21:24 > 0:21:25Oh, shit!

0:21:29 > 0:21:31Down! Down! Oh, Jesus!

0:21:32 > 0:21:36I think your dad may be involved in some sort of criminal activity.

0:21:36 > 0:21:39Well, criminals do tend to be involved in that kind of thing.

0:21:41 > 0:21:43Thank you.

0:21:43 > 0:21:45I can't do this. I can't break the law.

0:21:45 > 0:21:47You're only breaking it a bit.

0:21:47 > 0:21:48Selling cigarettes,

0:21:48 > 0:21:51it's like being a newsagent but only much more profitable.

0:21:51 > 0:21:53- I can't!- You can!

0:21:55 > 0:21:58No, look, I can't be a career criminal.

0:21:58 > 0:22:00My mum would be so disappointed.

0:22:00 > 0:22:02And I haven't got the right A-levels!

0:22:02 > 0:22:04Well, you can't just walk away.

0:22:04 > 0:22:05Can't I?

0:22:05 > 0:22:07You're working for us now.

0:22:07 > 0:22:10And you're the one who's been selling cigarettes.

0:22:10 > 0:22:11You're already a criminal, Mike.

0:22:11 > 0:22:13Yeah, but I didn't know!

0:22:13 > 0:22:14I could just come clean!

0:22:15 > 0:22:17They'll never believe you.

0:22:17 > 0:22:19What kind of idiot would run an illegal front

0:22:19 > 0:22:20without even realising?

0:22:20 > 0:22:23I think once they talk to me they'll see how that could happen.

0:22:23 > 0:22:25If you shut down his operation, my dad'll kill you.

0:22:25 > 0:22:28- Well, yeah, he's bound to be angry at first...- No.

0:22:28 > 0:22:30He'll actually kill you.

0:22:30 > 0:22:33- I don't want to die. - Pull yourself together!

0:22:33 > 0:22:34- Ow!- You're going to be fine.

0:22:34 > 0:22:36- I am?- Yes.

0:22:36 > 0:22:39Because you're going to keep up your end of the deal

0:22:39 > 0:22:43and keep your mouth shut, and everyone's going to be happy. Right?

0:22:50 > 0:22:52So we're all happy! Yeah?

0:23:00 > 0:23:02- Did you tell her?- I tried!

0:23:02 > 0:23:03Mike!

0:23:03 > 0:23:05I'm very confused right now!

0:23:05 > 0:23:08I'm extremely scared and I'm partially aroused.

0:23:08 > 0:23:10- Ugh!- Oh...

0:23:17 > 0:23:19- SANDRA:- Keith!

0:23:19 > 0:23:20Keith!

0:23:21 > 0:23:23Yes, love?

0:23:23 > 0:23:25Can I have a quick word with you in here?

0:23:27 > 0:23:28Yep.

0:23:36 > 0:23:39Why were you eating your "fockassia" in there anyway?

0:23:39 > 0:23:41Don't worry!

0:23:41 > 0:23:43There's a little man on site who does this kind of thing.

0:23:43 > 0:23:45I'll give him a call.

0:23:45 > 0:23:47Erm, I could have a look at it.

0:23:47 > 0:23:51No, Keith, I don't want you grubbing around like a common workman!

0:23:51 > 0:23:55- Look, I insist, go back in there and finish your lunch.- Hmm...

0:23:55 > 0:23:57Well, why don't you let Keith have a look at it?

0:23:57 > 0:24:00I've pressed auto-dial, the die is cast.

0:24:03 > 0:24:05PHONE RINGS

0:24:05 > 0:24:06I could get me tools...?

0:24:08 > 0:24:12No, he'll pick up. It's all part of the service contract.

0:24:12 > 0:24:13PHONE CONTINUES RINGING

0:24:24 > 0:24:25'lo?

0:24:26 > 0:24:27Hello?

0:24:30 > 0:24:32I think we have a problem with...

0:24:32 > 0:24:34The toilet, yeah.

0:24:34 > 0:24:37Erm... I'll get right on to it.

0:25:03 > 0:25:05All right, Terry? What's going on?

0:25:05 > 0:25:07What's going on? The whole operation's been burned,

0:25:07 > 0:25:09that's what's going on! Someone grassed!

0:25:09 > 0:25:11It wasn't me! I swear!

0:25:13 > 0:25:15Don't hurt him! It wasn't him!

0:25:15 > 0:25:17How do we know that?

0:25:17 > 0:25:20- Think, Dad, why would he come here? - To cover his tracks!

0:25:20 > 0:25:23- You saw him, he was freaked out! - How do we know he wasn't faking it?

0:25:23 > 0:25:25He's not smart enough.

0:25:25 > 0:25:27She's right, I'm really not!

0:25:27 > 0:25:29No-one else knew!

0:25:29 > 0:25:30Big Tim knew.

0:25:30 > 0:25:32Aren't you Big Tim?

0:25:32 > 0:25:33No, I'm Big Andy.

0:25:33 > 0:25:36- No names!- Sorry.- Sorry.

0:25:36 > 0:25:38HE CHOKES

0:25:54 > 0:25:55Goodbye, Mike.

0:26:12 > 0:26:13You!

0:26:13 > 0:26:15You did this!

0:26:15 > 0:26:16Of course I bloody did!

0:26:16 > 0:26:18And you should be thanking me.

0:26:18 > 0:26:21What for? I lost my job, my girlfriend...

0:26:21 > 0:26:24Yes, but you didn't get killed by her dad, and that's a big positive.

0:26:24 > 0:26:26True.

0:26:26 > 0:26:27And everyone got out unscathed.

0:26:27 > 0:26:30Yeah, apart from Big Tim. They're going to kill him!

0:26:30 > 0:26:33Kill him? Do you mean I might have caused a man's death?

0:26:33 > 0:26:35Well, only if they catch him.

0:26:37 > 0:26:40'Hi, it's Laura. I just wanted to say thank you for all your help...'

0:26:40 > 0:26:42Oh, another client's just walked in.

0:26:42 > 0:26:43(Two secs.)

0:26:43 > 0:26:46- 'Oh, OK, well, erm, maybe...' - OK, bye.

0:26:46 > 0:26:48Ah, just dropping off the keys for 17.

0:26:48 > 0:26:51I was going to call you. Are you OK?

0:26:52 > 0:26:55Yeah, I'm sorry about...you know.

0:26:55 > 0:26:56Oh, don't worry.

0:26:57 > 0:26:59Maybe it's for the best.

0:27:00 > 0:27:03Living in a small flat when you're not getting on is tough.

0:27:03 > 0:27:04Yeah, I know about that.

0:27:05 > 0:27:08And you'll see them in the new place.

0:27:09 > 0:27:11- New place?- Her new flat.

0:27:13 > 0:27:15- She did tell you, didn't she?- No!

0:27:15 > 0:27:19But she's signed contracts and put a deposit down and everything.

0:27:19 > 0:27:21Unbelievable!

0:27:21 > 0:27:23I can't believe she didn't...

0:27:23 > 0:27:25That's pretty brutal.

0:27:25 > 0:27:27Yeah, well, that's Laura!

0:27:27 > 0:27:29Wow. I could never be that cold.

0:27:29 > 0:27:32You know, you just get to a point where you think...

0:27:32 > 0:27:34- Is it worth it?- Yeah,

0:27:34 > 0:27:37and you know what? I'm not sure it is any more.

0:27:39 > 0:27:42You know what, Jamie? You are a great guy.

0:27:44 > 0:27:48And...she doesn't deserve someone like you.

0:27:50 > 0:27:51And...

0:28:00 > 0:28:02Sorry, I probably shouldn't have...

0:28:11 > 0:28:14Housewarming! Woo!

0:28:14 > 0:28:16Say goodbye to Mummy!

0:28:16 > 0:28:17Bye!

0:28:17 > 0:28:19You're an arch little bitch.

0:28:19 > 0:28:22No, I'm just someone who actually knows what she wants.

0:28:26 > 0:28:27Nice!