0:00:22 > 0:00:26CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:00:26 > 0:00:28Hey!
0:00:30 > 0:00:32How nice!
0:00:33 > 0:00:35How lovely.
0:00:37 > 0:00:39Good evening.
0:00:39 > 0:00:42And welcome to QI, for a show all about numbers.
0:00:42 > 0:00:45Tonight, we will cross the divide and go forth and multiply,
0:00:45 > 0:00:47and in addition, we will subtract lots of points from Alan.
0:00:47 > 0:00:49So... LAUGHTER
0:00:49 > 0:00:52Let's meet our four fine figures. The rational Colin Lane...
0:00:52 > 0:00:56- CHEERING AND APPLAUSE - Thank you.
0:00:56 > 0:00:57..the complex Sarah Millican...
0:00:57 > 0:00:59CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:01:01 > 0:01:03..the imaginary Noel Fielding...
0:01:03 > 0:01:06CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:01:08 > 0:01:10..and the extremely random Alan Davies.
0:01:10 > 0:01:12CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:01:15 > 0:01:18So, if they would like to grab my attention,
0:01:18 > 0:01:20they can count on their buzzers and Colin goes...
0:01:20 > 0:01:23# One, two, three, four, five. #
0:01:23 > 0:01:24Sarah goes...
0:01:24 > 0:01:25# Five, four, three, two, one. #
0:01:25 > 0:01:28- That's pretty good. - Ah, that's very good. Noel goes...
0:01:28 > 0:01:30# Two, four, six, eight. #
0:01:30 > 0:01:32And Alan goes...
0:01:32 > 0:01:34# ABC, ABC. #
0:01:34 > 0:01:36LAUGHTER
0:01:38 > 0:01:40So, here is question one.
0:01:40 > 0:01:43Which is the loneliest number?
0:01:43 > 0:01:44# Three, four, five. #
0:01:44 > 0:01:46- Yes?- One?
0:01:46 > 0:01:47No.
0:01:47 > 0:01:50It's the obvious one, but it's not that one.
0:01:50 > 0:01:52So, maybe two is the loneliest number,
0:01:52 > 0:01:55because it's next to the one that gets talked about the most.
0:01:55 > 0:01:57And do you know what?
0:01:57 > 0:02:00I would make that entirely a correct answer
0:02:00 > 0:02:02if it wasn't so horribly wrong. No.
0:02:02 > 0:02:05- ALAN:- Three is the magic number. - Three is the magic number.
0:02:05 > 0:02:07Well, I've never tried, but so they say.
0:02:07 > 0:02:09LAUGHTER
0:02:11 > 0:02:13- SARAH:- See, I was going to say two, as well,
0:02:13 > 0:02:15cos I just thought it depends on what your marriage is like.
0:02:15 > 0:02:18Yeah. LAUGHTER
0:02:18 > 0:02:20- NOEL:- Is it 13, cos it's quite unlikely,
0:02:20 > 0:02:22so the other numbers don't want to go near it?
0:02:22 > 0:02:24LAUGHTER
0:02:24 > 0:02:26- OK, so it is an unpopular number.- Nought.
0:02:26 > 0:02:29- No, it's quite a high number. So, there's a mathematician...- 100.
0:02:29 > 0:02:31- You're going in the right direction. NOEL:- And 14.- 200.
0:02:31 > 0:02:34- No, we're not going to play this higher or lower.- 101.
0:02:34 > 0:02:36- 79.- 102, 103, 104...110.
0:02:36 > 0:02:38- Yes!- 110?- It's 110.
0:02:38 > 0:02:40- 110.- Alan gets the point.
0:02:40 > 0:02:43CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:02:43 > 0:02:45So, there's a mathematician called Alex Bellos
0:02:45 > 0:02:48and he wanted to find the world's favourite number.
0:02:48 > 0:02:52So, he asked a lot of people and 30,023 people responded.
0:02:52 > 0:02:58And the lowest whole number that nobody chose was 110.
0:02:58 > 0:03:01- It was everybody's least favourite number. AUDIENCE:- Aw.
0:03:01 > 0:03:05So, QI has adopted it as our favourite number.
0:03:05 > 0:03:06- Yay!- Yes.
0:03:06 > 0:03:08APPLAUSE
0:03:10 > 0:03:14That was a very, very lukewarm round of applause.
0:03:14 > 0:03:15You prefer number seven, don't you?
0:03:15 > 0:03:18CHEERING
0:03:18 > 0:03:20OK, well, why might you prefer number seven?
0:03:20 > 0:03:22That's a really interesting thing.
0:03:22 > 0:03:23- NOEL:- Is it the lucky number?
0:03:23 > 0:03:25- It's the world's favoured number.- Oh.
0:03:25 > 0:03:29That is the one that Alex Bellos discovered most people preferred.
0:03:29 > 0:03:31And, in fact, there was a National Lottery draw
0:03:31 > 0:03:33which rather bore this out.
0:03:33 > 0:03:34The 23rd of March 2016,
0:03:34 > 0:03:37five of the six numbers were multiples of seven, OK?
0:03:37 > 0:03:39So, there was 7, 14, 21, 35, and 42,
0:03:39 > 0:03:41and the other one was 41
0:03:41 > 0:03:43and so many people chose them,
0:03:43 > 0:03:46you got more money from matching four numbers
0:03:46 > 0:03:48than you did from matching five.
0:03:48 > 0:03:52So, four numbers you got £51 and five right you got £15.
0:03:52 > 0:03:55Anyway, have a look at these different numbers.
0:03:55 > 0:03:57So, number one, anybody know what that one is
0:03:57 > 0:03:58- right there in the middle? COLIN:- Er...
0:03:58 > 0:04:02- They're hieroglyph. - I'm not good on hieroglyphics.
0:04:02 > 0:04:03Pass.
0:04:03 > 0:04:05So, what were you saying, Colin? You were making a noise.
0:04:05 > 0:04:07- You were just making the noise? - I was just making a noise.
0:04:07 > 0:04:10- What was the noise? - Err.- Yeah. So, that's...
0:04:10 > 0:04:14- Weirdly, it's quite close to the correct answer.- Is it?- Yes.
0:04:14 > 0:04:16It's a man holding his hands up,
0:04:16 > 0:04:19and he's most likely called either Huh, or Huuh,
0:04:19 > 0:04:21or huh-huh-huh-huuuh.
0:04:21 > 0:04:23The thing is, there are no vowels in hieroglyphs
0:04:23 > 0:04:25and we don't know how it's pronounced,
0:04:25 > 0:04:27but it's going to be some kind of vowely-H sound,
0:04:27 > 0:04:30and he represents a million for the Egyptians.
0:04:30 > 0:04:33- Oh.- I think he's just going like, "I've no idea how many."
0:04:34 > 0:04:35I think he's lost his keys.
0:04:35 > 0:04:37Someone went, "Do you know where your keys are?"
0:04:37 > 0:04:39And he went, "I don't know."
0:04:39 > 0:04:41They're on your elbows, mate.
0:04:44 > 0:04:46Let's have a look at the other ones that we've got,
0:04:46 > 0:04:48other than our Egyptian.
0:04:48 > 0:04:51So, the eye, anybody know what the eye is, another pictogram?
0:04:51 > 0:04:53I'll go for five.
0:04:53 > 0:04:54No, it's four, three.
0:04:54 > 0:04:56- -1.- Hmm, hmm, hmm.
0:04:56 > 0:04:58- Two.- Zero.- Yeah!- Zero?- Zero!
0:04:58 > 0:04:59- Zero, very good. NOEL:- Zero?
0:04:59 > 0:05:01It looks like I'm working you today.
0:05:04 > 0:05:06It's the Mayan number zero.
0:05:06 > 0:05:09They had the concept of zero by about 30 BC,
0:05:09 > 0:05:12at which time the Romans and the Greeks didn't bother with it.
0:05:12 > 0:05:15- Couldn't be arsed.- They didn't have a number zero.- Why's it eye shaped?
0:05:15 > 0:05:17It looks like the eye's got prison bars over it.
0:05:17 > 0:05:19Like they've outlawed looking.
0:05:22 > 0:05:25No, the Greeks didn't bother with it, cos maths was more geometry for them,
0:05:25 > 0:05:27so the zero didn't make any sense.
0:05:27 > 0:05:32In fact, we don't get the zero in Europe until about the 13th century.
0:05:32 > 0:05:34Before that, couldn't be arsed.
0:05:36 > 0:05:39Let's have another look. OK, number three there.
0:05:39 > 0:05:44Two to the power of 74,207,281 minus one.
0:05:44 > 0:05:47Is it going to be the highest prime number or something?
0:05:47 > 0:05:50It is. The largest prime number. You are on fire tonight.
0:05:50 > 0:05:52CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:05:54 > 0:05:56It's a Mersenne prime.
0:05:56 > 0:05:58It is the largest one they've ever discovered.
0:05:58 > 0:06:03It contains 228,388,618 digits in total.
0:06:03 > 0:06:07It's basically 2x2x2 74 million times...
0:06:07 > 0:06:09- Wow.- ..minus one.
0:06:09 > 0:06:11That's my lucky number.
0:06:13 > 0:06:15But it's impossible to believe these things, isn't it,
0:06:15 > 0:06:18that it's not divisible by anything at all?
0:06:18 > 0:06:20- That's... - That's absolutely mind blowing.
0:06:20 > 0:06:23- Mind blowing, isn't it, that that's a prime number?- Yeah.
0:06:23 > 0:06:27So, the next one, number four there, eight billion and 85.
0:06:27 > 0:06:29Any thoughts what that might be?
0:06:29 > 0:06:31- That's a huge number, isn't it? - Bacteria on your person?
0:06:31 > 0:06:33Oh, gross me out.
0:06:33 > 0:06:36LAUGHTER
0:06:36 > 0:06:37Bacteria within your person?
0:06:37 > 0:06:39SANDI AND SARAH GROAN
0:06:39 > 0:06:42Bacteria trying to get out of your person.
0:06:42 > 0:06:44I've honestly never felt so filthy.
0:06:47 > 0:06:51So, if you were to write out all the numbers from one to ten billion
0:06:51 > 0:06:55in words and organise them into alphabetical order,
0:06:55 > 0:06:58this is the very first one that would be an odd number.
0:06:58 > 0:07:02And that is because eight is the very first number alphabetically.
0:07:02 > 0:07:04It begins with E.
0:07:04 > 0:07:06Also, all the numbers beginning with eight
0:07:06 > 0:07:09have to come before the next number, which would be 11.
0:07:09 > 0:07:11So, it goes eight, eight billion, eight billion and eight,
0:07:11 > 0:07:15eight billion and 18, eight billion and 80, eight billion and 88,
0:07:15 > 0:07:17eight billion and 85,
0:07:17 > 0:07:21so, it's the very first one that is an odd number.
0:07:21 > 0:07:24OK, would it be a problem if you just explained that again?
0:07:27 > 0:07:30Did you wish to take the news with you to Australia?
0:07:30 > 0:07:32Look what I brought back from England,
0:07:32 > 0:07:36this amazing piece of information, that I still don't understand.
0:07:36 > 0:07:40I'm trying to work out a face that I can do that would be
0:07:40 > 0:07:42as if I did understand that.
0:07:46 > 0:07:50Let's have a look back at the ones we have left in our number cloud.
0:07:50 > 0:07:52142,857.
0:07:52 > 0:07:56If I tell you it's a cyclic number, does that mean anything to you?
0:07:56 > 0:07:59- No, is it to do with bicycles? - Oh, I like that.
0:07:59 > 0:08:02"How many bicycles in Paris?" that kind of thing.
0:08:02 > 0:08:03No. So, if you take this number
0:08:03 > 0:08:07and you multiply it by any number between one and six,
0:08:07 > 0:08:10the answer will always be an anagram of the original number.
0:08:10 > 0:08:13So, it will just keep all those numbers.
0:08:13 > 0:08:15Look there, times two, times three, times four.
0:08:15 > 0:08:17AUDIENCE MEMBER: Ooh!
0:08:17 > 0:08:20Good noise! "We don't understand, but we're going to make a noise."
0:08:20 > 0:08:23This is the beginnings of subjugation.
0:08:23 > 0:08:26This number is an anagram of the other numbers.
0:08:26 > 0:08:29"Ooh, numbers."
0:08:29 > 0:08:31Let's have a look at the number 43.
0:08:31 > 0:08:33Any idea about the number 43?
0:08:33 > 0:08:36What I say my age is.
0:08:36 > 0:08:40- Just joking. - Are you older or younger?
0:08:40 > 0:08:42- I'm older, yes. - See, I was being polite.
0:08:42 > 0:08:44Thank you.
0:08:44 > 0:08:47Boys don't mind about their age, do they?
0:08:47 > 0:08:49Do boys mind about their age?
0:08:49 > 0:08:50They pretend that they...
0:08:50 > 0:08:52- You're shaking your head. - I don't mind about my age.
0:08:52 > 0:08:55- I don't mind about mine. - I'm 38 and proud.
0:08:58 > 0:09:01- Nothing wrong with that. - I'd no idea. A year older than me.
0:09:01 > 0:09:03LAUGHTER
0:09:03 > 0:09:06So, it's a Frobenius number. I'm not helping, am I?
0:09:06 > 0:09:09- No.- They didn't even give you an "Ooh".
0:09:10 > 0:09:13I'm going to explain it in terms of McDonald's, OK?
0:09:13 > 0:09:16So, this is a mathematical problem posed by a German
0:09:16 > 0:09:19called Ferdinand Frobenius in the early 20th century.
0:09:19 > 0:09:21Let's say it's Chicken McNuggets.
0:09:21 > 0:09:25They are only sold in multiples of six, nine and 20.
0:09:25 > 0:09:31And 43 is the largest number of McNuggets it's impossible to buy.
0:09:31 > 0:09:35You could get 41, because you could have 20 and nine and six and six.
0:09:35 > 0:09:38You could have 42 because you could have four lots of nine and a six.
0:09:38 > 0:09:41You could have 44, because you could have four lots of six and a 20.
0:09:41 > 0:09:45You cannot buy 43 McNuggets.
0:09:48 > 0:09:50You'd have to throw some away.
0:09:50 > 0:09:53Not even if you know Ronald McDonald?
0:09:53 > 0:09:54No.
0:09:54 > 0:10:00Now, how did the Danish government convince its citizens to multiply?
0:10:00 > 0:10:02This is one of my Randy Scandies.
0:10:02 > 0:10:04You mean...
0:10:04 > 0:10:06- Actually?- I do mean that.
0:10:06 > 0:10:08Was it financial incentives?
0:10:08 > 0:10:11- There were incentives.- We all need incentives anyway, don't we?
0:10:11 > 0:10:13What, to procreate?
0:10:13 > 0:10:15Just, you know, the bit before that, as well.
0:10:15 > 0:10:17Right. I'm fine, but OK.
0:10:19 > 0:10:21Incentivise me.
0:10:21 > 0:10:25I can narrow it down. It's actually a place called Thisted,
0:10:25 > 0:10:28which is in Jutland, so the mainland, the bit that sticks out from Germany.
0:10:28 > 0:10:31What happened? 2015, the local authorities were going to close down
0:10:31 > 0:10:33the local school and everybody
0:10:33 > 0:10:37was very upset in the local area so they struck a deal that the people
0:10:37 > 0:10:41would procreate as much as possible if they kept the school
0:10:41 > 0:10:43and the leisure facilities open.
0:10:43 > 0:10:47Nothing says "I'm bringing sexy back" like a council memo.
0:10:49 > 0:10:51Did they all do it? Did they all have to have kids?
0:10:51 > 0:10:54Well, as many as possible. They were encouraged to have kids.
0:10:54 > 0:10:56I have to say, it's a lovely place, Thisted.
0:10:56 > 0:10:59Not a lot to do. Number three on their own website of things to do
0:10:59 > 0:11:02in the area is visit the candle shop.
0:11:05 > 0:11:08Sexy candles for around the bath.
0:11:08 > 0:11:11There's been lots of times before, Britain has had its own panics
0:11:11 > 0:11:14about falling populations because of the war and contraception and so on.
0:11:14 > 0:11:16So, in 1921, the Daily Express
0:11:16 > 0:11:20ran a competition to find Britain's largest family.
0:11:20 > 0:11:24The News of the World offered a free tea tray
0:11:24 > 0:11:28to any mother who gave birth to her tenth child.
0:11:28 > 0:11:31Don't want your bloody tea tray, I'll take your head off with it.
0:11:33 > 0:11:36And the French still give medals for having large families.
0:11:36 > 0:11:39That's still a thing. The Medaille de la Famille Francaise.
0:11:39 > 0:11:41How many kids for bronze? What do you reckon?
0:11:41 > 0:11:44- Six.- Four to five. Silver, six to seven.
0:11:44 > 0:11:46Gold, eight plus.
0:11:46 > 0:11:49I thought you said 45, for a second there.
0:11:49 > 0:11:53There is so much wrong with that picture, I can't begin.
0:11:53 > 0:11:57- Go on.- Why are they creating a human bench for their two children?
0:11:57 > 0:12:00- That is worrying.- Have they glued their heads together?
0:12:00 > 0:12:05Maybe they're ventriloquists and that's how they hold their toy.
0:12:05 > 0:12:08Just used to holding people like that.
0:12:09 > 0:12:12Now, here's something nice.
0:12:12 > 0:12:15Cake. You've each got a cake and a knife.
0:12:15 > 0:12:18And here is the challenge.
0:12:18 > 0:12:22I want you to cut two pieces of exactly equal size.
0:12:22 > 0:12:25Now, you can use three cuts to do it, but in such a way
0:12:25 > 0:12:29that the cake is still moist for you to have some more tomorrow.
0:12:29 > 0:12:31What would be the best way of cutting it?
0:12:31 > 0:12:33Could the cake stay moist in my tummy?
0:12:33 > 0:12:36- Because then you just half it. - Then you could just half it. No.
0:12:36 > 0:12:38So, the idea is that there is cake for tomorrow.
0:12:38 > 0:12:41So, we're going to start with Alan and Colin first.
0:12:41 > 0:12:46- What is your...- Well, my theory is that we cut through the middle.
0:12:46 > 0:12:49- OK.- This is going to be difficult, but we're going to do it.
0:12:49 > 0:12:53- Right.- And then, we take the top off.
0:12:53 > 0:12:55- OK.- Yes.
0:12:55 > 0:12:58And we eat the bottom bit.
0:12:58 > 0:13:00You're going to eat the whole of the bottom bit?
0:13:00 > 0:13:03But that's quite a large piece of cake, isn't it?
0:13:03 > 0:13:05Yeah, yeah.
0:13:05 > 0:13:07We're two men in our 30s, we love cake.
0:13:10 > 0:13:13Take the top of. Colin will remove the bottom of the cake.
0:13:15 > 0:13:17Then put the top back down again.
0:13:17 > 0:13:21That's moist for tomorrow and then we cut this... place that there,
0:13:21 > 0:13:24we cut completely in half, like that.
0:13:24 > 0:13:27- Two equal pieces. - Wow, that's very good.
0:13:27 > 0:13:29APPLAUSE
0:13:34 > 0:13:38Do you think anybody who likes the filling is going to be mildly disappointed?
0:13:40 > 0:13:41So, let's go over to...
0:13:41 > 0:13:44- I've got an idea. - No, do it with the cake!
0:13:44 > 0:13:46- I'm just going to draw it first. - Oh, fine.- Is that OK?
0:13:46 > 0:13:48- Yes, darling, you do what you like.- Yeah.
0:13:48 > 0:13:50LAUGHTER
0:13:50 > 0:13:55What if we cut it like, in a way that we could... back together?
0:13:55 > 0:13:59We could to get that out of here and then just smush...
0:13:59 > 0:14:01Yeah, just...
0:14:01 > 0:14:03That would be better, wouldn't it?
0:14:03 > 0:14:06- Shall we do it?- That was a shambles, what they did.
0:14:07 > 0:14:10- The smushing doesn't sound good. - I reckon we have to do this first.
0:14:10 > 0:14:14- Do you think?- OK, go for it, Sarah.
0:14:14 > 0:14:16OK. So...
0:14:16 > 0:14:19- Oh, it's tough.- Delicious is what you're looking for.
0:14:19 > 0:14:21LAUGHTER
0:14:21 > 0:14:25- And then, that.- You've just drawn Pacman, that doesn't make any sense.
0:14:25 > 0:14:26So, take out your pieces.
0:14:26 > 0:14:28These are our pieces.
0:14:32 > 0:14:35Noel, were you calling US a shambles?
0:14:35 > 0:14:39Is that what you were saying? There you go.
0:14:45 > 0:14:48So, there is a mathematical way of doing it.
0:14:48 > 0:14:51There was a man called Francis Galton. An extraordinary fellow.
0:14:51 > 0:14:54He was an explorer and he was the very first person to come up with the idea
0:14:54 > 0:14:57of a weather map and he was also slightly obsessed with the idea
0:14:57 > 0:15:00of sharing a Christmas cake with his wife in an even manner.
0:15:00 > 0:15:03So, what he did was he wrote a long treaties on the subject,
0:15:03 > 0:15:05which he sent to Nature magazine.
0:15:05 > 0:15:08You were absolutely heading in the right direction.
0:15:08 > 0:15:10What you do is you cut it right down the middle like this
0:15:10 > 0:15:12and then you pull out the entire centre piece.
0:15:12 > 0:15:15- Ah, that was it! - That's only two cuts though.
0:15:15 > 0:15:18Wait, I haven't finished. You pull out the whole thing like this
0:15:18 > 0:15:22and then you cut that one in half, so then you have two pieces.
0:15:22 > 0:15:24- We were nearly there. - You were very nearly there.
0:15:24 > 0:15:27You have two pieces of cake like that and then you simply push
0:15:27 > 0:15:29the cake back together.
0:15:30 > 0:15:33Looks very similar to ours.
0:15:35 > 0:15:39So, anyway that's how you can half your cake and eat it.
0:15:39 > 0:15:42Now to a question about wrong numbers.
0:15:42 > 0:15:46Where's the worst place in the world for nuisance calls?
0:15:46 > 0:15:48LAUGHTER
0:15:49 > 0:15:51What a great picture.
0:15:51 > 0:15:54Do you not think you thought more carefully about making
0:15:54 > 0:15:57a phone call when you had dial it one number at a time?
0:15:57 > 0:16:00If you had to dial someone who had lots of eights and nines in it,
0:16:00 > 0:16:02- sometimes you wouldn't bother. - You just couldn't be arsed.
0:16:02 > 0:16:05I mean, are we looking for a country?
0:16:05 > 0:16:07- We are looking for a place.- The country with the most people in?
0:16:07 > 0:16:11No, ironically, the place with the fewest telephones for a short while.
0:16:11 > 0:16:14So, it's the Pacific island of Niue.
0:16:14 > 0:16:15It looks fab, doesn't it?
0:16:15 > 0:16:19Niue. So, in the early '90s, people were constantly woken up
0:16:19 > 0:16:23by heavy breathers because the country was the home of an extremely
0:16:23 > 0:16:27lucrative sex line business and people often used
0:16:27 > 0:16:29to dial the wrong number.
0:16:29 > 0:16:33There were only 387 telephones on the island and the phone numbers
0:16:33 > 0:16:36only had four digits so people were often misdialling.
0:16:36 > 0:16:39So, this is people ringing the wrong number and expecting a sex line?
0:16:39 > 0:16:43- Yes.- So, if they're already heavy breathing, they've started already.
0:16:43 > 0:16:45I didn't know this.
0:16:45 > 0:16:50Maybe it was just a helpline for asthma, people with asthma.
0:16:52 > 0:16:56Nothing sexual. That guy's trying to ring nine people at the same time.
0:16:56 > 0:16:57That's not going to work.
0:16:57 > 0:17:00So they had a terrible time because people were constantly getting wrong
0:17:00 > 0:17:03numbers and Belgium was another country that ran sex lines
0:17:03 > 0:17:05for quite a while. When they were banned,
0:17:05 > 0:17:08this is the most brilliant thing, they started a new thing,
0:17:08 > 0:17:10which was cookery lines with recipes read
0:17:10 > 0:17:12in the most sexual way possible.
0:17:14 > 0:17:17- They had to read out sexy recipes. - What's a sexy recipe?
0:17:17 > 0:17:19Toad in the hole.
0:17:22 > 0:17:25I can't think of anything more exciting, I think.
0:17:25 > 0:17:28I quite fancy a toad in the hole.
0:17:28 > 0:17:31Last time I had that, I had a football under my arm
0:17:31 > 0:17:34and a catapult in my pocket.
0:17:34 > 0:17:35Two weeks ago.
0:17:37 > 0:17:40We are going to make our own nuisance call this evening.
0:17:40 > 0:17:44There is a number that anybody can ring in Sweden
0:17:44 > 0:17:48and it's a scheme set up by the country's tourism authority
0:17:48 > 0:17:50to celebrate 250 years of free speech in Sweden
0:17:50 > 0:17:53and its called Ring a Random Swede.
0:17:55 > 0:17:57It's genuinely a random thing.
0:17:57 > 0:17:59We've no idea who we're going to get.
0:17:59 > 0:18:02We've already pre-selected a question from a member
0:18:02 > 0:18:05of the audience and the question is why do you eat rotten fish?
0:18:06 > 0:18:08Does anybody speak Swedish?
0:18:08 > 0:18:11Here's the marvellous thing about Scandinavians,
0:18:11 > 0:18:14- their English is really coming along.- OK.
0:18:20 > 0:18:23So, the marvellous sound department are going to put the call through
0:18:23 > 0:18:27now and obviously we'll have to explain what it is we're doing to this person.
0:18:27 > 0:18:29PHONE DIALS
0:18:56 > 0:18:57MAN SPEAKS OWN LANGUAGE
0:18:57 > 0:19:01- Hello.- Hello.- Hi, my name is Sandi, I'm ringing I'm from London.
0:19:01 > 0:19:02Who's that?
0:19:04 > 0:19:07Robin. Hi. You're my random Swede that I'm ringing.
0:19:09 > 0:19:12Is it your first phone call from an English person?
0:19:14 > 0:19:15Oh!
0:19:15 > 0:19:19Well, this is kind of exciting, Robin, because I'm ringing you
0:19:19 > 0:19:22from a live television studio from London.
0:19:22 > 0:19:25You're on the BBC right now, is that OK?
0:19:28 > 0:19:31OK. I tell you what, we'll have a round of applause from our audience.
0:19:31 > 0:19:33Maybe you can hear that.
0:19:33 > 0:19:34APPLAUSE
0:19:40 > 0:19:42So, what do you do Robin?
0:19:47 > 0:19:48Are you actually in the shop?
0:19:48 > 0:19:52OK. So, we have a question from our audience.
0:19:52 > 0:19:54You may be buying this now, what do I know?
0:19:54 > 0:19:57Why do Swedish people eat rotten fish is the question
0:19:57 > 0:19:59we want to ask you.
0:20:10 > 0:20:12It was lovely to speak to you, Robin.
0:20:12 > 0:20:14APPLAUSE
0:20:19 > 0:20:22- His English was pretty good. - That English coming along.
0:20:22 > 0:20:24Yeah, coming along.
0:20:24 > 0:20:26You'll never meet an unfriendly Swede, that's my view.
0:20:26 > 0:20:29No, darling, that's because they're usually drunk.
0:20:29 > 0:20:30LAUGHTER
0:20:30 > 0:20:32It's a Danish-Swedish thing.
0:20:32 > 0:20:35Let's play How Many People In The Audience...
0:20:35 > 0:20:38Each of my panellists has got a coloured card
0:20:38 > 0:20:40and the audience also has coloured cards
0:20:40 > 0:20:43and I'm going to get them to stand up and I want you to
0:20:43 > 0:20:47tell me which item on this list relates
0:20:47 > 0:20:50to the number of people who are standing.
0:20:50 > 0:20:52We're going to start with Colin, what colour is your card?
0:20:52 > 0:20:56- Blue.- So, could all the blue card people stand up please?
0:20:56 > 0:20:58What do you reckon, Colin?
0:20:58 > 0:21:01How many people do you think that is?
0:21:04 > 0:21:05It's about 182.
0:21:05 > 0:21:09- OK.- It's 230 people.
0:21:09 > 0:21:13It took 230 people to do one of these five things.
0:21:13 > 0:21:16Selfie fatalities in 2014.
0:21:16 > 0:21:20It is not. It is something a little bit more substantial.
0:21:20 > 0:21:23- Built the Eiffel Tower.- Built the Eiffel Tower is absolutely right.
0:21:23 > 0:21:26Built by 230 people in two years.
0:21:26 > 0:21:29Sit back down again and we will come to Sarah.
0:21:29 > 0:21:31What colour is your card?
0:21:31 > 0:21:34- I have red.- So, could I have the red cards standing please?
0:21:34 > 0:21:36How many do you think that might be?
0:21:37 > 0:21:39- 100, maybe.- 69.
0:21:39 > 0:21:42So, have a look at the list, what do you reckon?
0:21:42 > 0:21:44I think maybe the selfie fatalities.
0:21:44 > 0:21:47You keep going for that one. It isn't that.
0:21:47 > 0:21:51It's the world record number of children born to a single mother.
0:21:51 > 0:21:53No way.
0:21:53 > 0:21:55- What?- All of you are now related.
0:21:55 > 0:21:58It's a woman called Valentina Vassilyev.
0:21:58 > 0:22:00She had 16 pairs of twins,
0:22:00 > 0:22:02she had seven sets of triplets
0:22:02 > 0:22:07and four sets of quadruplets in 40 years, between 1725 and 1765.
0:22:07 > 0:22:09In total, 27 births.
0:22:09 > 0:22:11Her husband, Feodor Vassilyev,
0:22:11 > 0:22:15went on to have a further 18 children with his second wife.
0:22:15 > 0:22:19So, he left her?! After all of those kids!
0:22:19 > 0:22:21I think she died. I think she died.
0:22:21 > 0:22:23It's unbelievable, isn't it?
0:22:23 > 0:22:25But, the way she was having children,
0:22:25 > 0:22:28was like someone was unscrewing her and...
0:22:29 > 0:22:32Let's have a look at yours, Noel. What colour is your card?
0:22:32 > 0:22:35White. Let's have all the white cards stand.
0:22:35 > 0:22:38How many people do you reckon that is?
0:22:38 > 0:22:41- 50?- 49, almost exactly right.
0:22:41 > 0:22:45- What does that represent? COLIN:- (Selfie fatalities.)
0:22:45 > 0:22:49Everybody's gone for the selfie fatalities, what do you reckon?
0:22:49 > 0:22:51QI contestants.
0:22:51 > 0:22:54You should have gone for the selfie fatalities.
0:22:58 > 0:23:01That number of people, very sadly, in 2014, died taking a selfie.
0:23:01 > 0:23:0516 came from a fall, four from a gunshot, one from an animal,
0:23:05 > 0:23:07I don't know what the story is, I've no idea.
0:23:07 > 0:23:10The most common place apparently to die taking a selfie is in India.
0:23:10 > 0:23:12Followed by Russia.
0:23:12 > 0:23:15I tell you what, Alan, why don't you get the whole audience to stand up?
0:23:15 > 0:23:17Everyone please rise.
0:23:17 > 0:23:19- Here we are. - AUDIENCE RISES NOISILY
0:23:19 > 0:23:22- So, that's the entire audience. - Oh, I've heard that noise before.
0:23:26 > 0:23:29Turn your back for two seconds.
0:23:29 > 0:23:33625 people is the QI audience.
0:23:33 > 0:23:36I can tell you it represents people who died in a certain way.
0:23:36 > 0:23:41They didn't die together. It was 625 individual incidents.
0:23:41 > 0:23:44- Domestic accidents? - It's an accident in the home.
0:23:44 > 0:23:45Coming to panel shows?
0:23:48 > 0:23:51The word coming is going to be most...
0:23:51 > 0:23:53No. No!
0:23:53 > 0:23:56- Getting jiggy? - It's the number of people in 2014
0:23:56 > 0:24:00who died from autoerotic asphyxiation.
0:24:01 > 0:24:03Sit down, you dirty bastards!
0:24:06 > 0:24:11Sorry, I'm confused. I thought for a moment you were all autoerotics.
0:24:11 > 0:24:14That's how to explain the dangers of autoerotic asphyxiation
0:24:14 > 0:24:16using our studio audience.
0:24:16 > 0:24:20All of which talk of hard sums brings us to the insoluble equation
0:24:20 > 0:24:23that is general ignorance.
0:24:23 > 0:24:25So, fingers on buzzers, please.
0:24:25 > 0:24:30In terms of numbers, which is the most common vertebrate in the world?
0:24:31 > 0:24:33- Alan.- Humans.
0:24:33 > 0:24:35KLAXON
0:24:36 > 0:24:38No, we never leave out the klaxon.
0:24:38 > 0:24:41We'll get some more. We'll get some more.
0:24:41 > 0:24:437 billion humans.
0:24:43 > 0:24:46I can tell you already there are more chickens than there are...
0:24:46 > 0:24:48ALAN'S BUZZER
0:24:50 > 0:24:52- Chickens. - Chickens, that should do it.
0:24:59 > 0:25:01- SARAH'S BUZZER - It's not rats?- No.
0:25:01 > 0:25:03KLAXON
0:25:03 > 0:25:06It's not rats.
0:25:06 > 0:25:08- I have got it.- Yes.
0:25:08 > 0:25:11People who died of auto asphyxiation.
0:25:13 > 0:25:14- It's a fish.- Fish, fish!
0:25:14 > 0:25:18It's a fish called the Bristlemouth and it's tiny.
0:25:18 > 0:25:21It is smaller than your finger but if it opens its mouth up wide it's
0:25:21 > 0:25:24got these incredible needle-like teeth.
0:25:24 > 0:25:27It's an amazing fish. It glows and it eats even smaller creatures,
0:25:27 > 0:25:31which you can see there, called copepods, but they are not vertebrates.
0:25:31 > 0:25:34But this is the largest number of vertebrates in the world.
0:25:34 > 0:25:37They live in the sea between half a mile and three miles down and until
0:25:37 > 0:25:40the 21st-century, so they got the very fine dredging nets,
0:25:40 > 0:25:43we didn't really know how many there were.
0:25:43 > 0:25:45The estimate now is that there are as many as a dozen
0:25:45 > 0:25:48- per square metre of ocean surface.- Whoa.
0:25:48 > 0:25:50And they disguise themselves as diagrams.
0:25:50 > 0:25:52They do.
0:25:52 > 0:25:55The most common animal in the world is an invertebrate.
0:25:55 > 0:25:57It's the nematode worm.
0:25:57 > 0:26:00Four out of five of all animals is a nematode worm.
0:26:00 > 0:26:03Anything that comes at you like that without any eyes...
0:26:07 > 0:26:10That's why some of us made the life choices we did.
0:26:10 > 0:26:12CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:26:17 > 0:26:21The word noon comes from the word nun, which meant nine,
0:26:21 > 0:26:24so with that that in mind, if you had to meet a ninth-century nun
0:26:24 > 0:26:27at noon, what time would you noodle off to the nunnery?
0:26:32 > 0:26:37Noon means nun, which came from nine, you're meeting the nun at nine.
0:26:37 > 0:26:39Nun, what time would you meet if you were meeting the nun at noon?
0:26:39 > 0:26:4112?
0:26:41 > 0:26:43KLAXON
0:26:44 > 0:26:47- Nine.- Yeah. No.
0:26:47 > 0:26:49KLAXON
0:26:50 > 0:26:53There isn't a nun.
0:26:53 > 0:26:54KLAXON
0:26:57 > 0:27:00- Anyone else want have a go? - Just call them, instead.
0:27:00 > 0:27:02Until the mid-12th century,
0:27:02 > 0:27:05the word noon meant three o'clock in the afternoon.
0:27:05 > 0:27:06Ah, bollocks.
0:27:08 > 0:27:12You were so winning, as well. You just destroyed your score.
0:27:12 > 0:27:15It goes back to old Christian prayer times,
0:27:15 > 0:27:17so it used to be that the day began at 6am,
0:27:17 > 0:27:19so that was known as the prime or the first hour
0:27:19 > 0:27:22and then you have terces, so the third hour, that would be 9am today.
0:27:22 > 0:27:25- Nonny's the ninth hour.- That guy in the orange has got my haircut.
0:27:28 > 0:27:30He's praying for a new one.
0:27:30 > 0:27:33"Please, I don't want to be in Cabaret any more!"
0:27:37 > 0:27:41Until the Middle Ages, noon was 3pm and all this talk of time makes me
0:27:41 > 0:27:43realise it must be time for the scores.
0:27:43 > 0:27:45In last place with -41 is Alan.
0:27:49 > 0:27:52It should be Sarah next, but we're going to skip over that
0:27:52 > 0:27:54and we're going to put in third place Colin, with -9.
0:27:58 > 0:28:01Thank you. And in second-place, Noel, with one point!
0:28:04 > 0:28:07So, Sarah actually got -26, but I was supposed to do a gig for Sarah
0:28:07 > 0:28:11and I let her down by becoming the new host of QI and I couldn't do it,
0:28:11 > 0:28:15so this week's winner, to make up for it, is Sarah Millican!
0:28:15 > 0:28:17APPLAUSE
0:28:25 > 0:28:28That's all from Sarah, Noel, Colin,
0:28:28 > 0:28:31Alan and me. And I leave you with this number-related,
0:28:31 > 0:28:34neolithic newspaper nugget from the Eastern Evening News.
0:28:34 > 0:28:38When two men stole six sheep from a farm at Mumford,
0:28:38 > 0:28:42they found that they could only get five of them into the back of their van.
0:28:42 > 0:28:45So, the other one had to sit in the cab between the two men.
0:28:45 > 0:28:48But the men had to pass through Watton on their way home.
0:28:48 > 0:28:51Fearing that the sheep sitting in the cab might be conspicuous,
0:28:51 > 0:28:54they disguised it by putting a trilby hat on its head.
0:28:55 > 0:28:56Good night.