0:00:02 > 0:00:04This programme contains adult humour.
0:00:04 > 0:00:05Ladies and gentlemen!
0:00:05 > 0:00:08Today, you will see one of our great young surgeons in action.
0:00:08 > 0:00:10A young man famous for performing
0:00:10 > 0:00:13over 1,000 amputations and lithotomies.
0:00:13 > 0:00:17A celebrated surgeon, a knife of the night.
0:00:17 > 0:00:19A true pioneer.
0:00:19 > 0:00:24So, without further ornaments, or adornments on my part,
0:00:24 > 0:00:31let me now finally, and without any further hesitation or reservation,
0:00:31 > 0:00:36introduce you to Mr Robert Lessing!
0:00:36 > 0:00:39CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:00:43 > 0:00:44Good afternoon.
0:00:44 > 0:00:48I'm always astonished that my humble skills
0:00:48 > 0:00:51can bring in such a large and distinguished crowd.
0:00:51 > 0:00:52CROWD CHUCKLE
0:00:52 > 0:00:54Hello, Sally, you in again?
0:00:55 > 0:00:59The sad fact is that 40% of the operations
0:00:59 > 0:01:04that happen in this room do unfortunately end in death.
0:01:04 > 0:01:05MUTTERING
0:01:05 > 0:01:08If that is something you're unable to contend with,
0:01:08 > 0:01:13gentlemen, ladies, please, I suggest you leave the theatre now.
0:01:16 > 0:01:19Thank you, Peters. Let me introduce you to our patient today.
0:01:19 > 0:01:22A Mr Joseph Smiles.
0:01:22 > 0:01:24A brave haberdasher of this borough.
0:01:26 > 0:01:28Now, Mr Smiles, let's tell the ladies and gentlemen
0:01:28 > 0:01:30what happened to you.
0:01:30 > 0:01:33You broke your leg chasing a thief across London Bridge.
0:01:33 > 0:01:34That's right, mister.
0:01:37 > 0:01:39CROWD GASPS
0:01:39 > 0:01:42My personal speed record for a full amputation of the leg
0:01:42 > 0:01:44above the knee is 92 seconds.
0:01:45 > 0:01:50In order to minimise the amount of pain Mr Smiles suffers,
0:01:50 > 0:01:52I intend to break that record today.
0:01:58 > 0:02:01This is more fun than Madame Tussauds.
0:02:10 > 0:02:11HE SNEEZES
0:02:16 > 0:02:19Ben, thank you so much for agreeing to do this again.
0:02:23 > 0:02:26It should be more enjoyable for you than when you tried that chloroform.
0:02:28 > 0:02:31Oh, John, darling, my tooth's hurting something rotten.
0:02:31 > 0:02:34- Can you have it out?- Annie, I'm just in the middle of something,
0:02:34 > 0:02:36- can you come back tonight? - No, I've got customers tonight.
0:02:36 > 0:02:39- Can't you smash it out now?- Oh...
0:02:39 > 0:02:41You won't want to work after I've pulled your tooth.
0:02:41 > 0:02:43I've got to, ain't I?
0:02:43 > 0:02:46- Will you pay me this time? - Pay you in trade.
0:02:46 > 0:02:47DOOR OPENS
0:02:47 > 0:02:49Did I hear someone talk money?
0:02:49 > 0:02:52- Butterworth. How are you?- Hmm...
0:02:54 > 0:02:55All the better for that.
0:02:55 > 0:02:59You got the money, Mr Sutton, for the doings, for the arsenic
0:02:59 > 0:03:02and the bleach powder and the rest of it? Got the sue?
0:03:02 > 0:03:07I do, yes, of course. I don't have it currently here with me.
0:03:07 > 0:03:09Oh, that's a shame.
0:03:09 > 0:03:12Cos Mr Walker said if you said that,
0:03:12 > 0:03:15I should stand on your head and jump up and down a bit.
0:03:15 > 0:03:18Then break your wrist.
0:03:18 > 0:03:20Yes, well, I see. How about, um...
0:03:24 > 0:03:26Have you two met? Annie, this is Mr Butterworth,
0:03:26 > 0:03:28Mr Butterworth, Annie.
0:03:28 > 0:03:31How about... Annie, if I pull your teeth now,
0:03:31 > 0:03:32rather than be in my debt,
0:03:32 > 0:03:36how about you offer Mr Butterworth here some trade, so to speak,
0:03:36 > 0:03:38and Mr Butterworth,
0:03:38 > 0:03:42you and I could consider that treat as some form of down payment?
0:03:44 > 0:03:47Fair dos. Do I get my pipe sucked before you smash her teeth out?
0:03:49 > 0:03:51I'll let you two fix the details.
0:03:54 > 0:03:56BUZZ OF CONVERSATION
0:03:57 > 0:03:59Coat's disgusting.
0:04:01 > 0:04:05Some say the more bloody the coat, the greater the surgeon.
0:04:05 > 0:04:08I will first slice through the flesh before sawing.
0:04:08 > 0:04:10GASPING
0:04:12 > 0:04:13Brandy, please, nurse.
0:04:13 > 0:04:14Oh...
0:04:16 > 0:04:18Cigarette.
0:04:19 > 0:04:22I like to smoke during the operations.
0:04:22 > 0:04:24The smell of gangrene can be terrible.
0:04:24 > 0:04:26- Sorry, mister. - Mr Smiles, may I operate?
0:04:26 > 0:04:29- Well...- I'll take that as a yes. Time me, Sue!
0:04:30 > 0:04:32Get off! Get off! I want my leg!
0:04:32 > 0:04:35- No, you don't, it's going to kill you.- I like it!
0:04:35 > 0:04:37HE SCREAMS
0:04:37 > 0:04:39GASPING
0:04:39 > 0:04:41You cut his bollock off!
0:04:42 > 0:04:45It's his own fault, hold still. Pick it up.
0:04:45 > 0:04:47This is good, isn't it?
0:04:48 > 0:04:50Where is it?
0:04:51 > 0:04:52Bite on that.
0:04:52 > 0:04:55Please, trust me.
0:04:59 > 0:05:00SAWING
0:05:02 > 0:05:04Found it!
0:05:04 > 0:05:05MR SMILES GROANS AND WHIMPERS
0:05:12 > 0:05:14GROANING, GIGGLING
0:05:24 > 0:05:27What happens if you try to stop him cleaning himself like this?
0:05:27 > 0:05:30He gets violent and I have to hit him with my big stick.
0:05:31 > 0:05:34- Have you tried talking to him? - Eh?
0:05:34 > 0:05:37To try to ease his troubles?
0:05:37 > 0:05:38He's demented.
0:05:38 > 0:05:41I think if you treat people like an animal,
0:05:41 > 0:05:43they'll behave like an animal.
0:05:43 > 0:05:46Oh, so you're saying I should treat him like an animal.
0:05:47 > 0:05:49No, I'm saying maybe don't...?
0:05:53 > 0:05:55Ah, Dr Hendrik? Dr Hendrik, may I have a word?
0:05:57 > 0:05:59And you are?
0:06:00 > 0:06:03William Agar. One of the new alienists.
0:06:03 > 0:06:05Ah, you're a mad doctor, are you?
0:06:05 > 0:06:08Yes. In fact, you appointed me.
0:06:08 > 0:06:10Oh, you work here, do you?
0:06:10 > 0:06:14Yes, in the asylum. That you opened?
0:06:16 > 0:06:19I wanted to ask whether I might have permission to take Tom Birch
0:06:19 > 0:06:21out for the day to the park.
0:06:23 > 0:06:25Tom has an obsessive compulsion for cleanliness
0:06:25 > 0:06:27and can often become violent.
0:06:27 > 0:06:31- As a result, he's frequently beaten by the guards.- Good!
0:06:31 > 0:06:35I'd like to attempt a new form of Belgian therapeutic treatment
0:06:35 > 0:06:36with Tom.
0:06:37 > 0:06:39I'd like to talk to him.
0:06:41 > 0:06:42Are you a Jew?
0:06:42 > 0:06:44Sorry?
0:06:45 > 0:06:47If you are, I'll put you in my book.
0:06:48 > 0:06:51- I'm not a Jew.- Are you certain?
0:06:51 > 0:06:52Fairly certain.
0:06:53 > 0:06:57I'd like to talk to Tom to try to understand what plagues him.
0:06:58 > 0:07:02I'll put your name in anyway. To be on the safe side.
0:07:07 > 0:07:11Caroline! Were you hoping to find your husband?
0:07:11 > 0:07:13- I believe he's still operating. - I know.
0:07:14 > 0:07:16No, no, it's you I wish to see.
0:07:17 > 0:07:19- TEARFULLY:- Oh, it's so... - Oh, dear!
0:07:19 > 0:07:21Whatever's the matter?
0:07:21 > 0:07:24We had another one of our arguments.
0:07:24 > 0:07:27I don't know if I should be talking about this.
0:07:27 > 0:07:30Please be assured that the relationship between a patient
0:07:30 > 0:07:33and an alienist happens in the strict confidence.
0:07:33 > 0:07:38If I can understand, Caroline, perhaps I can help.
0:07:40 > 0:07:42I feel like I'm a bad wife.
0:07:42 > 0:07:46I'm often overly wilful and disorderly.
0:07:46 > 0:07:50- I find my head is turned by other thoughts.- I see.
0:07:53 > 0:07:54- WHISPERS:- Inappropriate thoughts.
0:07:56 > 0:07:57- WHISPERS:- I see.
0:07:58 > 0:08:01- Do you sleep?- Not well.
0:08:01 > 0:08:04I spend the night tossing and turning.
0:08:05 > 0:08:07HE CLEARS HIS THROAT
0:08:07 > 0:08:09Caroline, if you're willing,
0:08:09 > 0:08:12I'd like to try an unusual form of diagnosis with you.
0:08:12 > 0:08:17This is a phrenology head.
0:08:17 > 0:08:19Oh, I've read about this.
0:08:19 > 0:08:21This is a science which believes
0:08:21 > 0:08:24the mind of an individual is contained in the brain?
0:08:24 > 0:08:26That's right.
0:08:26 > 0:08:31This model shows where the different functions of the brain are located.
0:08:31 > 0:08:35By feeling the contours of someone's head,
0:08:35 > 0:08:40one can detect where certain functions are enlarged or decreased.
0:08:40 > 0:08:42This affects personality.
0:08:42 > 0:08:45- And you believe in this, do you? - I do.
0:08:47 > 0:08:49Caroline.
0:08:49 > 0:08:51May I...
0:08:51 > 0:08:53touch your head?
0:08:55 > 0:08:57You may.
0:08:57 > 0:08:59He should have used some ether on Smiles.
0:08:59 > 0:09:01Then you might not have hacked off his tallywags.
0:09:01 > 0:09:03Oh, yes, no, that's a good idea.
0:09:03 > 0:09:05Do you remember what happened last time we used ether?
0:09:05 > 0:09:08You put that fat navvy to sleep and he didn't wake up again.
0:09:08 > 0:09:12That was bad luck, I got the dosage wrong because of his fatness.
0:09:12 > 0:09:14Oh, it was his fault?
0:09:14 > 0:09:18- You're that Mr Lessing, isn't you? - Yes, I am.
0:09:18 > 0:09:21Becky? Come here. It IS that Mr Lessing!
0:09:21 > 0:09:24These drugs can help. And you know it.
0:09:24 > 0:09:26You turned an operation into an autopsy.
0:09:26 > 0:09:28You'd rather the patients were screaming.
0:09:28 > 0:09:30At least if they're screaming, I know they're alive.
0:09:30 > 0:09:34Have a seat, ladies. This is John, he's a tooth-puller.
0:09:34 > 0:09:37As opposed to being a testicle hacker.
0:09:47 > 0:09:50- Have you started yet?- I'm going to touch you now, Caroline.- Right.
0:10:06 > 0:10:08There is...
0:10:08 > 0:10:11Hmm! Yes! There is a small depression here
0:10:11 > 0:10:13at the crown of your head.
0:10:13 > 0:10:15This is the area that controls
0:10:15 > 0:10:17respect of authority
0:10:17 > 0:10:18and veneration to God.
0:10:18 > 0:10:20Oh, my goodness, Caroline,
0:10:20 > 0:10:22I can feel your cerebellar.
0:10:22 > 0:10:25I've never one felt like it.
0:10:25 > 0:10:26How do you mean?
0:10:27 > 0:10:31The cerebellar is the seat of...
0:10:31 > 0:10:33amativeness.
0:10:34 > 0:10:37Of loving fondness
0:10:37 > 0:10:40and marital...
0:10:40 > 0:10:42congress.
0:10:42 > 0:10:43Do you mean sexual love?
0:10:43 > 0:10:46- HIGH-PITCHED:- Yes! - HE CLEARS HIS THROAT
0:10:46 > 0:10:49- NORMALLY:- Yes, it's an area that's always larger on men than women.
0:10:49 > 0:10:51Well, normally it is.
0:10:51 > 0:10:53What's wrong with mine?
0:10:53 > 0:10:56Yours is enormous.
0:10:58 > 0:11:00Like something you might feel on a bull.
0:11:03 > 0:11:05I think this may to some degree
0:11:05 > 0:11:07explain the unhappiness you're feeling.
0:11:07 > 0:11:09Well, what should I do?
0:11:09 > 0:11:13I shall need to think what treatment to advise.
0:11:16 > 0:11:20Thank you, William. I found this very...helpful.
0:11:24 > 0:11:27As I'm now your patient, will you visit me again? Good.
0:11:27 > 0:11:30I think we'd better not tell my husband about your sessions,
0:11:30 > 0:11:33- do you agree? Wouldn't want him to worry unduly.- Mmm.
0:11:35 > 0:11:39There you are, Mr Lessing, two pints of the Squirrels.
0:11:39 > 0:11:41I gather you've had another week of successful operation.
0:11:41 > 0:11:43True, I suppose.
0:11:43 > 0:11:46The ladies can't get enough of your amputations, can they, sir?
0:11:48 > 0:11:52There is a matter I did want to have a quick word about, if possible.
0:11:52 > 0:11:54A personal medical matter.
0:11:57 > 0:12:00I'm leaking sperm at night.
0:12:02 > 0:12:07- Uh-huh.- My wife thinks that if it continues, I may well die.
0:12:07 > 0:12:11She suggested I shouldn't eat fruit which I think is a good idea.
0:12:11 > 0:12:14- It certainly is. - And convenient for me too,
0:12:14 > 0:12:17- because I never do eat fruit. - Well done.
0:12:17 > 0:12:21And then I had a good chat about it with Dr Flowers on the high street.
0:12:21 > 0:12:24Oh, yes, the king of the quacks, what did he say?
0:12:24 > 0:12:25Wear your culottes on your head
0:12:25 > 0:12:28and drink some expensive turd water that he happened to have on sale?
0:12:28 > 0:12:31No, he told me that I should take a large amount of mercury
0:12:31 > 0:12:33four times a day.
0:12:33 > 0:12:36And then he sold me a bottle of it for three pounds.
0:12:36 > 0:12:40- How's that working for you?- It's made me sweat, dribble and vomit.
0:12:40 > 0:12:42Which is very good.
0:12:42 > 0:12:46- That's the filth leaving my body. - Um...
0:12:46 > 0:12:49What would you suggest, then, do nothing?
0:12:49 > 0:12:51No, quite right.
0:12:51 > 0:12:52I'd say take lots of mercury.
0:12:52 > 0:12:54Maybe with some of your wife's urine.
0:12:54 > 0:12:58- Ahh!- Ah, the mentalist has decided to grace us.
0:12:58 > 0:13:02Where have you been, listening to someone open their mind?
0:13:02 > 0:13:03No, I've been at...
0:13:05 > 0:13:08..at the...lecture.
0:13:10 > 0:13:12William, this is Maggie.
0:13:12 > 0:13:14She's got a fancy for my surgery skills.
0:13:14 > 0:13:19- And this is, sorry, what's your name again, love?- Rebecca.- Oh, Becky.
0:13:19 > 0:13:21Girls, this is William, he's an alienist.
0:13:21 > 0:13:25- You won't know what that means. - Neither does he.- No-one does.
0:13:26 > 0:13:28Unclench, sir. Down the hatch.
0:13:28 > 0:13:31No, no, no brandies. I'm not getting tight tonight.
0:13:31 > 0:13:34- You're more fun when you do. - No, I'm not!
0:13:34 > 0:13:36GRUNTS NONCOMMITTALLY
0:13:36 > 0:13:39Or, shall we try a smatter of this?
0:13:39 > 0:13:43- Just come on sale, it's called Va Peru.- Oh, it looks fancy.
0:13:43 > 0:13:46It will restore health, energy and vitality.
0:13:46 > 0:13:48Oh, what's in it?
0:13:48 > 0:13:51Red wine and cocaine. The Pope likes it, he's endorsed it.
0:13:51 > 0:13:54- What does cocaine do, any side-effects?- Nothing major.
0:13:54 > 0:13:56ALL SING: # The way to build a boat
0:13:56 > 0:13:59# The way to build a boat
0:13:59 > 0:14:03# For ink and silk can teach the world
0:14:03 > 0:14:06# The way to build a boat
0:14:06 > 0:14:09# The way to build a boat! #
0:14:09 > 0:14:11CHEERING
0:14:13 > 0:14:14That was lovely!
0:14:14 > 0:14:16Right, who wants to come back to my place
0:14:16 > 0:14:19and take nitrous oxide till their balls fall off?
0:14:19 > 0:14:21CHEERING
0:14:21 > 0:14:24Before we go, I want to propose a toast...
0:14:25 > 0:14:29..in the presence of these whores, to us.
0:14:31 > 0:14:32Because we are great men.
0:14:34 > 0:14:36- Yes, we are.- We are great,
0:14:36 > 0:14:42and we will transform medicine for the benefit of all mankind forever.
0:14:42 > 0:14:45In the future.
0:14:45 > 0:14:46To us!
0:14:46 > 0:14:48- To us!- To us!
0:14:51 > 0:14:57# ..teach the world The way to build a boat... #
0:14:58 > 0:15:03- Hello, darling. Have you had a nice evening?- Mm-hmm.
0:15:03 > 0:15:07What have you been up to, have you been to one of your talks?
0:15:07 > 0:15:08I went to the local club dinner,
0:15:08 > 0:15:10we discussed the links between poverty and alcohol.
0:15:14 > 0:15:15Shall we go to bed now?
0:15:18 > 0:15:20- Darling?- Mm?- I was wondering, would you like to visit
0:15:20 > 0:15:23the John Frederick Lewis exhibition with me this weekend?
0:15:25 > 0:15:27No. Sorry, darling.
0:15:27 > 0:15:29I'm far too busy to look at paintings.
0:15:29 > 0:15:31Night.
0:15:34 > 0:15:36Yes, well, tell me all about it, Mrs Pope.
0:15:36 > 0:15:39I have a slight pain, a pressure...
0:15:40 > 0:15:42..here, Doctor.
0:15:45 > 0:15:48- Would you like to examine me? - Certainly not.
0:15:48 > 0:15:51I have never needed to examine any of my patients.
0:15:51 > 0:15:54And as you are well aware, it is not in the least appropriate
0:15:54 > 0:15:56for a gentleman to touch a woman.
0:15:56 > 0:15:59Now, indicate to me...
0:16:00 > 0:16:01..where the pain is. Hmm?
0:16:08 > 0:16:10In fact, here.
0:16:12 > 0:16:13- Here?- Yes.
0:16:19 > 0:16:20- There?- Yes.
0:16:21 > 0:16:24And it stings when I, you know...
0:16:24 > 0:16:27No, I don't know.
0:16:27 > 0:16:29Have a widdle.
0:16:30 > 0:16:33- Does it hurt here?- No.
0:16:33 > 0:16:35What about these?
0:16:37 > 0:16:38No.
0:16:38 > 0:16:42Clearly, you've got this problem because you are a woman.
0:16:43 > 0:16:47And I suspect you've been keeping the wrong company. I can cure it.
0:16:47 > 0:16:49You need to fast for a week,
0:16:49 > 0:16:52ride a horse for two hours a day, not Sundays,
0:16:52 > 0:16:57and place a freshly-cooked baked potato on the infected area.
0:16:57 > 0:16:58Good day, Mrs Pope.
0:17:04 > 0:17:07Matron, where is Mr Smiles?
0:17:07 > 0:17:08I'm afraid the trauma of the surgery
0:17:08 > 0:17:11was too much for his frail heart, Mr Lessing.
0:17:11 > 0:17:12He died in the night.
0:17:14 > 0:17:15You did your best.
0:17:19 > 0:17:22Hello, darling. Hello, John.
0:17:22 > 0:17:24- William.- Hello.
0:17:25 > 0:17:27Have you come to see your husband?
0:17:27 > 0:17:30In part, of course, yes.
0:17:30 > 0:17:33And I've just signed up to one of Mr Jasper's anatomy classes.
0:17:33 > 0:17:34Are women allowed on those classes?
0:17:34 > 0:17:37Well, someone's forgotten to say they're not allowed,
0:17:37 > 0:17:39so I'm going to be the first.
0:17:40 > 0:17:41Well, that's good.
0:17:43 > 0:17:48If you'll excuse me, I must go to...the lecture.
0:17:48 > 0:17:49What's the topic today?
0:17:52 > 0:17:53The...
0:17:53 > 0:17:56male...
0:17:56 > 0:17:57bowel.
0:18:00 > 0:18:04Ah, the tooth-puller and the barber.
0:18:04 > 0:18:07Discussing yesterday's disaster, I've no doubt.
0:18:07 > 0:18:10It wasn't a disaster, I successfully removed Mr Smiles's leg.
0:18:10 > 0:18:12Mr Smiles disagrees, or at least he would
0:18:12 > 0:18:15if he wasn't being buried at the moment.
0:18:15 > 0:18:17I wonder if some ether would have helped.
0:18:17 > 0:18:20Listen, gentlemen, I don't mind the patients dying,
0:18:20 > 0:18:21that is to be expected.
0:18:21 > 0:18:25What I do mind is when the paying spectators aren't happy.
0:18:25 > 0:18:30Now the Duke of Bedford is here and for some reason,
0:18:30 > 0:18:34entirely beyond me, is insisting on seeing you.
0:18:34 > 0:18:37Because I'm the best, that's why.
0:18:37 > 0:18:39Mr Smiles begs to differ.
0:18:39 > 0:18:42Or at least he would if he wasn't being buried at the moment.
0:18:45 > 0:18:48- What's the Duke's complaint? - A small tumour.
0:18:48 > 0:18:51He feels the time has come to remove it.
0:18:51 > 0:18:53Should I have come earlier?
0:18:53 > 0:18:56Oh, no, your Grace, it's barely noticeable.
0:18:56 > 0:18:58Yes, you should have come sooner.
0:18:59 > 0:19:01You need the tumour removed, your Grace.
0:19:01 > 0:19:04Or it will very likely prove fatal.
0:19:04 > 0:19:08- They say you're the finest young surgeon in the country.- Mm-hmm.
0:19:08 > 0:19:11- A cool mind.- Mm-hmm. - The steadiest hand.- Mm-hmm.
0:19:11 > 0:19:13Can you remove it?
0:19:13 > 0:19:16I can.
0:19:16 > 0:19:18The challenge is that during the operation,
0:19:18 > 0:19:20there will be considerable haemorrhaging that will
0:19:20 > 0:19:23block your airways preventing you from being able to breathe.
0:19:23 > 0:19:25That will be the real threat to your life.
0:19:25 > 0:19:30So, the procedure that I propose is a tracheotomy.
0:19:32 > 0:19:35I can puncture a hole in your throat, your Grace,
0:19:35 > 0:19:37and the placement of a simple tube...
0:19:37 > 0:19:40will enable you to breathe during the operation.
0:19:40 > 0:19:45- Is it safe?- It's far more dangerous to leave that tumour unattended to.
0:19:45 > 0:19:48The Greeks used to perform tracheotomies.
0:19:48 > 0:19:50We need to reclaim the skill.
0:19:51 > 0:19:54The great American president George Washington died on the table
0:19:54 > 0:19:58because his surgeons feared performing a tracheotomy.
0:19:58 > 0:19:59I don't fear it.
0:19:59 > 0:20:03Had I been there, the president would have lived.
0:20:03 > 0:20:04And so will you, your Grace.
0:20:04 > 0:20:08- Will this operation be a first? - I believe so.
0:20:08 > 0:20:10We know of some French surgeons
0:20:10 > 0:20:14that have contemplated a combined tumour removal and tracheotomy
0:20:14 > 0:20:18but so far none have yet dared attempt it.
0:20:18 > 0:20:21Then we must beat the French to it, sir.
0:20:21 > 0:20:23I offer you my face.
0:20:33 > 0:20:36John, it's four in the morning. Are you coming back to bed?
0:20:36 > 0:20:39Maggie, can I ask you a favour?
0:20:39 > 0:20:42Do you want to talk to my breasts again like they're naughty children?
0:20:42 > 0:20:45No, I want to watch you sniff this until you pass out.
0:20:45 > 0:20:47Good girl.
0:20:47 > 0:20:48Want to take a seat?
0:20:51 > 0:20:53I can get it right this time, I promise you.
0:20:53 > 0:20:56- I experimented on Maggie all right. - Always reliable.- Robert...
0:20:56 > 0:20:59Think what your reputation will become
0:20:59 > 0:21:02if you operate on a member of royalty and they don't feel pain.
0:21:02 > 0:21:06- Is this to improve my fame or yours? - It's to help the patient.
0:21:06 > 0:21:09What if you get the dose wrong? If you get the dose wrong and he dies?
0:21:09 > 0:21:12I'm trying to stop you doing to the Duke what you did to Smiles.
0:21:12 > 0:21:15- Oh, shut up. You kill many more people than I do.- What?
0:21:15 > 0:21:18Last week you gave that Hindu boy enough morphine to fill a horse.
0:21:18 > 0:21:21He was dying anyway. You kill people all the time.
0:21:21 > 0:21:23I'm a surgeon, you're a dentist!
0:21:23 > 0:21:26This is no time to conduct an experiment.
0:21:26 > 0:21:30- And you've had permission for this? - Yes, I have.
0:21:31 > 0:21:36Honestly, Fitz, what harm can it do? I simply want to read to Tom.
0:21:43 > 0:21:45Hello, Tom.
0:21:49 > 0:21:51If you'll allow me,
0:21:51 > 0:21:54I'd like to read you some poetry.
0:21:55 > 0:21:59This is called Frost At Midnight.
0:21:59 > 0:22:01HE CLEARS HIS THROAT
0:22:01 > 0:22:05The frost performs its secret ministry, un...
0:22:07 > 0:22:09HE ROARS
0:22:09 > 0:22:11Fitz, get him off me!
0:22:12 > 0:22:14- Shall I hit him?- Yes!
0:22:14 > 0:22:19- No, he don't like it.- Hit him, hit him with your big stick!
0:22:21 > 0:22:23There's five top surgeons in.
0:22:25 > 0:22:29An opera singer, a couple of jockeys. It's a good crowd.
0:22:30 > 0:22:35The pain will be unbearable for the Duke. And he's a member of royalty.
0:22:35 > 0:22:38- And you need time.- Yes.
0:22:38 > 0:22:40This gives you time.
0:22:40 > 0:22:42HE SIGHS
0:22:42 > 0:22:44If we do this, it needs to go like a dream, John.
0:22:44 > 0:22:45It will, it will.
0:22:47 > 0:22:48Then let's make history today.
0:22:48 > 0:22:51JOHN LAUGHS
0:22:52 > 0:22:54Thank you for coming to see me, William.
0:22:54 > 0:22:57- My emotions are in such turmoil. - What's happened?
0:22:59 > 0:23:01You can tell me, Caroline.
0:23:04 > 0:23:07Mr Jasper invited me to see the John Frederick Lewis exhibition.
0:23:07 > 0:23:12- Do you know his paintings?- No. - Oh, William, they're extraordinary.
0:23:12 > 0:23:14- Are they?- You know, the heat that comes off them,
0:23:14 > 0:23:18the camels, the...the exotic smell of the Egyptian bazaar.
0:23:18 > 0:23:20I see.
0:23:20 > 0:23:22But there was one painting in particular which has caused
0:23:22 > 0:23:24such chaos in my breast.
0:23:26 > 0:23:28What, what, what, what, what was it?
0:23:29 > 0:23:33It depicted two young women who were bathing.
0:23:35 > 0:23:38- In the female only part of the house.- Were they?
0:23:39 > 0:23:43And the unabashed nakedness of the two women
0:23:43 > 0:23:46coupled with an exquisite ability to convey the arid landscape
0:23:46 > 0:23:50of the Middle East was... breathtaking.
0:23:50 > 0:23:53But it was while Henry and I
0:23:53 > 0:23:55were sitting looking at this painting...
0:23:56 > 0:23:57..that he...
0:23:59 > 0:24:01He...
0:24:02 > 0:24:04What happened, Caroline?
0:24:06 > 0:24:08- WHISPERS:- He touched me.
0:24:10 > 0:24:12He touched me like this.
0:24:22 > 0:24:25- Caroline...- William?
0:24:27 > 0:24:30- It is best if I leave now.- Oh.
0:24:30 > 0:24:33We will speak again soon, I'm sure.
0:24:33 > 0:24:34Good day.
0:24:41 > 0:24:44- That is the toilet.- Yes. - Good day to you.
0:24:45 > 0:24:51My lords, ladies and gentlemen, and assorted members of royalty.
0:24:51 > 0:24:56The operation you're about to see has never been performed before...
0:24:56 > 0:24:58Thank you, Peters, we can do without the usual warm up today.
0:24:58 > 0:25:00Good afternoon.
0:25:00 > 0:25:05The surgery I will perform on his Grace today is indeed historic.
0:25:05 > 0:25:10The removal of a tumour, combined with a tracheotomy,
0:25:10 > 0:25:15and the assistance of ether as an analgesic, is triply unique.
0:25:15 > 0:25:19We live in a city of firsts, in an age of miracles.
0:25:21 > 0:25:24My friends from the newspapers will be recording our achievements
0:25:24 > 0:25:25for the eyes of the world.
0:25:27 > 0:25:30Ladies and gentlemen, I give you the Duke of Bedford.
0:25:31 > 0:25:33SCATTERED APPLAUSE
0:25:38 > 0:25:40There's nothing to fear, your Grace.
0:25:40 > 0:25:43In fact, you'll feel a wonderful sense of tranquillity,
0:25:43 > 0:25:47and perhaps a little swelling of the head,
0:25:47 > 0:25:48before sleep.
0:26:41 > 0:26:44I am feeling for the correct place of entry below the Adam's apple.
0:26:48 > 0:26:49I'm now opening the hole...
0:26:49 > 0:26:51GASPING
0:26:51 > 0:26:52..so that I can insert the breathing tube.
0:27:00 > 0:27:03Well done. Robert, this is amazing.
0:27:06 > 0:27:08The tracheotomy is now complete.
0:27:09 > 0:27:13The Duke can now breathe without the use of his nose or mouth.
0:27:13 > 0:27:17I can now remove the tumour without the threat of the Duke
0:27:17 > 0:27:19suffocating on his own blood.
0:27:27 > 0:27:28Oh, drat.
0:27:31 > 0:27:33Shit!
0:27:33 > 0:27:36Ladies and gentlemen, your attention please.
0:27:36 > 0:27:38Run, get out, run, run for your lives!
0:27:40 > 0:27:43Someone put it out, get a blanket!
0:27:49 > 0:27:54- Remove the Duke. - No. Leave him. Leave us.
0:28:20 > 0:28:21He's asleep.
0:28:24 > 0:28:26And he can't feel pain.
0:28:29 > 0:28:31We did set fire to him earlier.
0:28:32 > 0:28:35No-one said the journey would be easy.
0:28:35 > 0:28:38But what you're doing is extraordinary.
0:28:40 > 0:28:41We ARE great men.
0:28:43 > 0:28:44You are.
0:28:47 > 0:28:49John, when've we finished,
0:28:49 > 0:28:51I might even have a little of that cocaine wine.