0:00:02 > 0:00:03No. No, Captain, no.
0:00:03 > 0:00:04No.
0:00:06 > 0:00:08No!
0:00:08 > 0:00:09No, Captain!
0:00:09 > 0:00:11No, First Mate. No!
0:00:12 > 0:00:13No!
0:00:18 > 0:00:20I heard you call out, my love.
0:00:22 > 0:00:23Just...
0:00:24 > 0:00:25..bad dreams.
0:00:27 > 0:00:29Don't trouble yourself.
0:00:29 > 0:00:30On the Medusa again?
0:00:31 > 0:00:33In the hammock?
0:00:35 > 0:00:37I will be well now. Thank you.
0:00:39 > 0:00:40Go back to your room.
0:01:08 > 0:01:10He's never talked to me about it.
0:01:10 > 0:01:11Or anyone, I believe.
0:01:11 > 0:01:14But it gives him nightmares, and sometimes...
0:01:15 > 0:01:17His shakes stem from that?
0:01:17 > 0:01:20Oh, I've probably divulged too much.
0:01:20 > 0:01:22I will try to talk to him.
0:01:22 > 0:01:25See if I can find out what happened in that hammock.
0:01:25 > 0:01:26Thank you.
0:01:26 > 0:01:27HE GASPS
0:01:27 > 0:01:30- Ah! - William, are you quite all right?
0:01:30 > 0:01:32HE GASPS
0:01:32 > 0:01:34I have an abdominal pain.
0:01:34 > 0:01:36I fear it's the stones.
0:01:36 > 0:01:37Ohh...
0:01:37 > 0:01:40Your husband is going to examine me, in fact.
0:01:40 > 0:01:42HE EXHALES
0:01:46 > 0:01:50Are you aware of a famous mesmerist, Mr Lantha Kapoor?
0:01:50 > 0:01:52- No. Who is he? - I've been reading about him.
0:01:52 > 0:01:55He cured an epileptic girl of her fits.
0:01:55 > 0:01:57He visited her every day for a month,
0:01:57 > 0:01:59and did hour-long sessions with her in her bedroom.
0:01:59 > 0:02:02Why is it mesmerised patients are always young ladies
0:02:02 > 0:02:05who have to be taken to a darkened room for an hour or so,
0:02:05 > 0:02:08and the man then proceeds to stand over them doing this?
0:02:08 > 0:02:09You surprise me.
0:02:09 > 0:02:12I'd have thought someone like you would have been more open-minded
0:02:12 > 0:02:13about the powers these men have.
0:02:13 > 0:02:17Now, I'd like to see one of these sessions. Wouldn't you?
0:02:17 > 0:02:21I'd be interested to witness this Mr Kapoor in action.
0:02:21 > 0:02:23Perhaps you and I could go and visit him one afternoon.
0:02:23 > 0:02:25Oh, I'd like that.
0:02:28 > 0:02:30Perhaps you'd like to join us, John.
0:02:30 > 0:02:32Yes, why don't you come too?
0:02:32 > 0:02:34Mr Kapoor's uncle has a restaurant in the docks.
0:02:34 > 0:02:35Kapoor's?
0:02:35 > 0:02:37I love it.
0:02:37 > 0:02:39I like the hot sloppy ones, and that strange bread they do.
0:02:39 > 0:02:41HE GASPS
0:02:41 > 0:02:43- Oh, William, it does seem terribly painful.- Oh!
0:02:43 > 0:02:45HE GASPS
0:02:45 > 0:02:47Oh, I wouldn't want to complain.
0:02:47 > 0:02:48Only hurts when I breathe in.
0:02:48 > 0:02:52Right, where's the patient? Sorry to keep you waiting. Come down, please.
0:02:52 > 0:02:55Darling, I know you're interested in medicine,
0:02:55 > 0:02:57but this will not be educational...
0:02:57 > 0:02:58or pleasant.
0:02:58 > 0:03:00Don't worry, I'm leaving.
0:03:00 > 0:03:01Can I leave as well?
0:03:01 > 0:03:04Well, you keep on about requiring patients to try ether on -
0:03:04 > 0:03:06- here's one. - I haven't agreed to any of this yet.
0:03:06 > 0:03:08The surgery or the ether.
0:03:10 > 0:03:13Are you sure you're fit to operate?
0:03:14 > 0:03:16Of course!
0:03:17 > 0:03:20John, could you pass me my book on genitals, please?
0:03:23 > 0:03:25Loosen your trousers for me.
0:03:32 > 0:03:34ROBERT SIGHS
0:03:36 > 0:03:38HE SIGHS
0:03:38 > 0:03:41Ah! Yes, that hurts there.
0:03:41 > 0:03:45And I have headaches and vomiting.
0:03:45 > 0:03:47Well, it is clearly a bladder stone, I'm afraid.
0:03:47 > 0:03:50It's a brief, but...painful operation.
0:03:50 > 0:03:52Genitals.
0:03:52 > 0:03:56Ah, now these are drawings I've done for some of my students.
0:03:56 > 0:03:59Oh, there's one on the removal of the foreskin in cases of phimosis.
0:03:59 > 0:04:01What a fine hand you have.
0:04:01 > 0:04:03No, that's his cock.
0:04:03 > 0:04:04Ah, here we are - lithotrity.
0:04:04 > 0:04:06So...
0:04:06 > 0:04:08option one...
0:04:09 > 0:04:13..we go up your urethra with one of these.
0:04:13 > 0:04:15John, if you wouldn't mind.
0:04:15 > 0:04:21And then I insert this, and spin the device until the stones crush,
0:04:21 > 0:04:23and then later you piss the bits out.
0:04:23 > 0:04:26Or, rather more excitingly, option two,
0:04:26 > 0:04:30the new Lessing Lithotrity Contrivance.
0:04:31 > 0:04:36I go up your urethra with this, until I feel the bladder stone...
0:04:37 > 0:04:42..I grip the stone with the unique adjustable head...
0:04:43 > 0:04:45..and then I bang it with my hammer.
0:04:45 > 0:04:48And then later you piss the bits out.
0:04:48 > 0:04:49Is there an option three?
0:04:49 > 0:04:51Option three is leave it,
0:04:51 > 0:04:54and remain in agony until you become incontinent and die.
0:04:54 > 0:04:57In a packed field, I'd try option two.
0:04:57 > 0:04:59A wise choice.
0:04:59 > 0:05:01How many people have you tried that on?
0:05:01 > 0:05:03People, as in living people?
0:05:05 > 0:05:07And you can have the operation under chloroform,
0:05:07 > 0:05:08so you don't feel any pain.
0:05:08 > 0:05:11You're advising chloroform over ether this week, are you?
0:05:11 > 0:05:12I am.
0:05:12 > 0:05:15A pleasant apple-blossom smell, with less of a hangover,
0:05:15 > 0:05:17and no blistering of the nasal passage.
0:05:17 > 0:05:20Didn't that Scottish dentist kill several people this week
0:05:20 > 0:05:21trying chloroform?
0:05:21 > 0:05:23Hamish never knows what he's doing.
0:05:23 > 0:05:26He got the dosage entirely wrong cos it was a cold day.
0:05:26 > 0:05:29I will try very hard not to kill you.
0:05:29 > 0:05:30Promise.
0:05:30 > 0:05:34The Lancet last week warned that chloroform should be used
0:05:34 > 0:05:35in cases of emergency only.
0:05:35 > 0:05:38You're seriously considering excruciating genital pain
0:05:38 > 0:05:40over a dose of chloroform?
0:05:40 > 0:05:42Excruciating but brief genital pain.
0:05:42 > 0:05:45Well, it's not YOUR tackle on the table, is it?
0:05:45 > 0:05:47I don't know about any of this yet.
0:05:47 > 0:05:51I've got a patient this afternoon - an open-minded woman
0:05:51 > 0:05:53who is going to have seven teeth removed under chloroform.
0:05:53 > 0:05:56Why don't you come and witness that? Ye of little faith.
0:06:01 > 0:06:02GENTLE SNORING
0:06:06 > 0:06:09There. She's asleep.
0:06:10 > 0:06:12SHE BABBLES
0:06:12 > 0:06:15Don't worry - that's perfectly common with chloroform.
0:06:15 > 0:06:18Oh, I'm an angel!
0:06:19 > 0:06:23A naughty, naughty angel!
0:06:23 > 0:06:27Do people often say things when they are drugged?
0:06:27 > 0:06:29- Can do.- So...
0:06:29 > 0:06:35it's possible that...that I may say revealing things when I'm under.
0:06:35 > 0:06:37I hope so.
0:06:37 > 0:06:38HE CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY
0:06:38 > 0:06:42One chap I had in last week did an entire after-dinner speech to me
0:06:42 > 0:06:44while he was asleep. It was hilarious.
0:06:44 > 0:06:47Oh, Mr Wilson! You goat!
0:06:47 > 0:06:49SHE LAUGHS
0:06:49 > 0:06:51My husband's abroad.
0:06:52 > 0:06:55Let's go through a dark, dank alley...
0:06:55 > 0:06:57Shh... That's enough of that now.
0:06:57 > 0:06:58Ooh...
0:06:58 > 0:07:01- What's this you're writing, John? - Oh, it's my drug diary.
0:07:01 > 0:07:04In the evenings, I'm taking unusual, unknown substances,
0:07:04 > 0:07:06and dictating what I feel to Rosie.
0:07:06 > 0:07:08- Who's Rosie?- The thruppenny upright from Drury Lane.
0:07:08 > 0:07:10She writes down what I say, what I feel.
0:07:10 > 0:07:13It's terrible the things those girls get asked to do.
0:07:20 > 0:07:22Mother!
0:07:22 > 0:07:25What a delightful surprise! I wasn't expecting you.
0:07:25 > 0:07:28My darling boy, how lovely to see you.
0:07:28 > 0:07:32And I have brought Mina with me to visit you.
0:07:32 > 0:07:33You remember Mina?
0:07:33 > 0:07:37- SIMPERS:- I'm sure William needs no reminder.
0:07:37 > 0:07:38Of course not.
0:07:39 > 0:07:41How have you been, miss?
0:07:41 > 0:07:43Very well.
0:07:44 > 0:07:48Miss Mina has now inherited her dear father's estate.
0:07:48 > 0:07:51When was it that you two last saw each other?
0:07:51 > 0:07:54Can you remember it as well as I do, William?
0:07:54 > 0:07:56Yes...of course!
0:08:00 > 0:08:03It was your uncle's 60th birthday party...
0:08:03 > 0:08:05Birthday, yes, yes, of course.
0:08:05 > 0:08:07It seems like yesterday to me
0:08:07 > 0:08:10that you two used to visit the fairground together as children,
0:08:10 > 0:08:12hand in hand.
0:08:12 > 0:08:16We rode the helter-skelter together, and beat the dwarves with sticks.
0:08:16 > 0:08:17Yes.
0:08:17 > 0:08:19Yes, happy days.
0:08:19 > 0:08:22I was asking after you, and was shocked to hear you're ailing.
0:08:22 > 0:08:24A case of...
0:08:24 > 0:08:25- WHISPERS:- ..the stones?
0:08:25 > 0:08:26Yes.
0:08:26 > 0:08:29She insisted that I come to visit you.
0:08:29 > 0:08:32Do you find any relief when you pass wind?
0:08:32 > 0:08:34Sadly...
0:08:34 > 0:08:37I have been to see Dr Flowers on the high street for you.
0:08:37 > 0:08:42He prescribed a parsnip and vinegar drink that I have bought you.
0:08:42 > 0:08:46It is well known to ease the symptoms of the bladder stones.
0:08:46 > 0:08:48Thank you.
0:08:48 > 0:08:49Oh, let me get a glass for you.
0:08:52 > 0:08:55- GRUFFLY:- Miss, may I have a glass, please, for Mr Agar?
0:08:55 > 0:08:57- WHISPERS:- She's so fond of you!
0:08:57 > 0:08:59Are you free for dinner tonight?
0:08:59 > 0:09:00WHISPERS: No.
0:09:02 > 0:09:05- SIMPERS:- Here you are, dear William.
0:09:05 > 0:09:06I hope it aids you.
0:09:08 > 0:09:10Thank you so much.
0:09:26 > 0:09:27Ooh...
0:09:29 > 0:09:31That is...
0:09:31 > 0:09:32helpful.
0:09:32 > 0:09:34Finish it up.
0:09:41 > 0:09:42Mmm...
0:09:49 > 0:09:50HE SIGHS
0:09:51 > 0:09:53HE SWALLOWS AND SIGHS
0:09:55 > 0:09:57- All better.- Ahh!- Ah!
0:10:03 > 0:10:06I float like an elephant above the streets,
0:10:06 > 0:10:09above the uproar of life, and down below,
0:10:09 > 0:10:12all the little people seem to be in gentle but everlasting agitation.
0:10:12 > 0:10:14I am granted blessed respite
0:10:14 > 0:10:16from the secret burdens of my black heart,
0:10:16 > 0:10:19a sabbath, a proposed holiday from worry. Full stop.
0:10:19 > 0:10:22That was one sentence, was it?
0:10:22 > 0:10:25And who is this who comes from the apothecary?
0:10:25 > 0:10:27Ooh, let me guess.
0:10:27 > 0:10:28It's Mr Crocodile.
0:10:28 > 0:10:30I was wrong.
0:10:30 > 0:10:33He's come to speak to me in a profound but incomprehensible
0:10:33 > 0:10:34symbolic language
0:10:34 > 0:10:37that holds heavenly truths, but is hard to fathom.
0:10:37 > 0:10:40Can we have sex instead of doing this?
0:10:55 > 0:10:56The curry's terrific here.
0:10:56 > 0:10:59And the chilli in it will help numb your bladder pain.
0:10:59 > 0:11:02Oh, no, thank you. I'll watch you both eat.
0:11:04 > 0:11:07I'll have the mutton curry, thanks. Starving.
0:11:07 > 0:11:09Yes, I'll try the chicken curry, please.
0:11:10 > 0:11:12I think you'll like the food here.
0:11:12 > 0:11:14Can seem a little hot the first time you try it.
0:11:14 > 0:11:18Oh, I'm looking forward to it. Never had a curry.
0:11:18 > 0:11:20SHE SIGHS
0:11:20 > 0:11:22SHE INHALES SHARPLY
0:11:22 > 0:11:24SHE EXHALES
0:11:24 > 0:11:26That's delicious.
0:11:26 > 0:11:28Oh...
0:11:28 > 0:11:30Well, that gave my tum a nudge.
0:11:33 > 0:11:36- You don't have to finish it, Caroline.- No, I want to.
0:11:36 > 0:11:38It's delicious.
0:11:47 > 0:11:49Will you just excuse me? I just need to visit the...
0:11:49 > 0:11:51other room.
0:11:57 > 0:12:00What is occurring between you and Caroline?
0:12:00 > 0:12:01What do you mean?
0:12:02 > 0:12:05Nothing's occurring, I can assure you.
0:12:05 > 0:12:07You've gone red.
0:12:07 > 0:12:08So have you.
0:12:08 > 0:12:10I've eaten a curry!
0:12:11 > 0:12:13Be careful, William.
0:12:13 > 0:12:15Careful with what?
0:12:15 > 0:12:18I don't know what you're suggesting, truly.
0:12:19 > 0:12:23Johnathon, if you have a concern, give it a name.
0:12:25 > 0:12:27If I'm wrong, good.
0:12:29 > 0:12:31HE GASPS
0:12:32 > 0:12:35Oh, dear, are your stones hurting you again?
0:12:35 > 0:12:38I wouldn't... I wouldn't want to complain.
0:12:43 > 0:12:45You must be Mrs Lessing.
0:12:47 > 0:12:48I am.
0:12:48 > 0:12:50How do you do?
0:12:50 > 0:12:52Four teas, please, Uncle.
0:12:52 > 0:12:55This is my friend Mr Agar, an alienist from St Frederick's,
0:12:55 > 0:12:57and Mr Sutton.
0:12:57 > 0:12:58Good afternoon.
0:12:58 > 0:13:01You are interested in mesmerism?
0:13:01 > 0:13:02We all are.
0:13:02 > 0:13:04Sit, please.
0:13:04 > 0:13:07I am interested in what the phenomenon can tell us
0:13:07 > 0:13:09about the human mind,
0:13:09 > 0:13:13and how it may be harnessed to help with sickness, surgery...
0:13:13 > 0:13:15He's having his bladder stones out tomorrow.
0:13:15 > 0:13:18Mesmerism is of great benefit to medicine. Just last week,
0:13:18 > 0:13:23I removed a tumour from a man the size of an engorged cow's udder.
0:13:23 > 0:13:26The man was in a mesmerism trance, and felt not a twinge.
0:13:26 > 0:13:29In fact, during surgery, he whistled.
0:13:29 > 0:13:31How extraordinary!
0:13:31 > 0:13:36I believe the unassisted powers of nature can heal far better
0:13:36 > 0:13:39than any of the pills, powders or potions
0:13:39 > 0:13:41modern quacks try to push at us.
0:13:41 > 0:13:44Many such drugs are...lethal.
0:13:44 > 0:13:46If they're used wrongly.
0:13:46 > 0:13:49The human mind can achieve astonishing things
0:13:49 > 0:13:52if it is allowed to become... primitive again.
0:13:52 > 0:13:54Yes.
0:13:54 > 0:13:56Yes.
0:13:56 > 0:14:00So, can anyone learn to be a mesmerist, Mr Kapoor?
0:14:00 > 0:14:02I mean, could William? Could I?
0:14:02 > 0:14:03Indeed.
0:14:03 > 0:14:06Anyone can create a mesmerism trance.
0:14:06 > 0:14:10I myself was taught by the great Zadu Ali Chandra Rohit.
0:14:10 > 0:14:12Can you explain how it works?
0:14:12 > 0:14:16Mesmerism works through the physical transmission
0:14:16 > 0:14:18exerted by one animal over another,
0:14:18 > 0:14:22stemming from a transference of nervous energy.
0:14:22 > 0:14:23Oh...
0:14:23 > 0:14:25Would you like me to...demonstrate?
0:14:27 > 0:14:29What, can you do it here?
0:14:29 > 0:14:30In this room?
0:14:30 > 0:14:32I can mesmerise anywhere.
0:14:32 > 0:14:34You don't need me to be in your boudoir?
0:14:34 > 0:14:36You can use me as a subject.
0:14:36 > 0:14:37Or me.
0:14:37 > 0:14:42My fear with you is that your mind may be too easily sent to sleep.
0:14:42 > 0:14:45So I will choose a harder subject, if I may,
0:14:45 > 0:14:48the better to demonstrate my, er...
0:14:48 > 0:14:49powers.
0:14:52 > 0:14:53- Oh.- But...
0:14:53 > 0:14:57my fear with a woman like yourself, Caroline,
0:14:57 > 0:15:03is that you have too sophisticated, too cultured, questioning a mind
0:15:03 > 0:15:04to be entranced.
0:15:04 > 0:15:06I don't.
0:15:06 > 0:15:12A woman with your vital spirit will think and remonstrate and question.
0:15:12 > 0:15:14I don't. I won't.
0:15:14 > 0:15:17You will be incapable of passive submission.
0:15:17 > 0:15:20You will struggle to submit to the pleasure of it.
0:15:20 > 0:15:21I won't.
0:15:23 > 0:15:24Touch my fingertips...
0:15:26 > 0:15:30..and I will take you into a mesmerised trance.
0:15:30 > 0:15:32It may take a number of moments, but if you're willing...
0:15:32 > 0:15:34submit to me.
0:15:36 > 0:15:38HE BREATHES DEEPLY
0:15:41 > 0:15:46Through our fingertips, a vital energy flows from my body to yours.
0:15:46 > 0:15:49HE BREATHES DEEPLY
0:15:51 > 0:15:54My vital principle penetrates you now.
0:15:54 > 0:15:55SHE SIGHS
0:15:55 > 0:15:57- HE SIGHS - Mmmm...
0:15:57 > 0:16:00Keep your eyes on mine...
0:16:00 > 0:16:04and I will put you into an annihilating and healing sleep.
0:16:05 > 0:16:08Your skin is no longer a border between us.
0:16:10 > 0:16:12- SHE MOANS - Mmmmmm...
0:16:12 > 0:16:16Now I stroke you into deepness.
0:16:16 > 0:16:18HE INHALES
0:16:18 > 0:16:20HE HUMS AND MOANS
0:16:28 > 0:16:30SHE MOANS
0:16:30 > 0:16:33HUMMING AND MOANING CONTINUES
0:16:39 > 0:16:40Hey...
0:16:40 > 0:16:43Hey, hey, hey. No, no, no, no. No.
0:16:43 > 0:16:45Stop this.
0:16:45 > 0:16:48This is utterly unacceptable. Her honour is at stake.
0:16:49 > 0:16:51This isn't medicine, it's...
0:16:52 > 0:16:54- ..something else. - Why do you feel threatened?
0:16:54 > 0:16:57I am not threatened.
0:16:57 > 0:17:01But Mr Lessing will not want his wife being stroked by an Indian.
0:17:01 > 0:17:05Now, how does one wake a patient from this trance?
0:17:05 > 0:17:07- Should I slap her face?- Like this.
0:17:13 > 0:17:14SHE MOANS SOFTLY
0:17:20 > 0:17:22Now do you believe?
0:17:29 > 0:17:32Mr Steadman, there will be some pain,
0:17:32 > 0:17:35but I assure it's a relatively easy tumour removal,
0:17:35 > 0:17:38which I will do swiftly, and we will give you brandy for the pain.
0:17:38 > 0:17:41Mr Lessing, I have a request from Dr Hendrick.
0:17:41 > 0:17:43Certainly not, whatever it is.
0:17:43 > 0:17:46Mr Gideon is due to do this morning's student lecture,
0:17:46 > 0:17:50but he has found himself injured in a ditch outside a public house.
0:17:50 > 0:17:51Pisshead Gideon? Quelle surprise.
0:17:51 > 0:17:54The hospital are asking if you would speak in his absence.
0:17:54 > 0:17:55No, I don't want to do it.
0:17:55 > 0:17:58Will you offer it to my friend John Sutton?
0:17:58 > 0:18:00He suffers stupid students far better than I do.
0:18:00 > 0:18:03And he's desperate to tell anyone who will listen
0:18:03 > 0:18:05about his tedious drugs.
0:18:05 > 0:18:06Ah, my 11 o'clock.
0:18:06 > 0:18:08You're early.
0:18:08 > 0:18:11PATIENT GROANS
0:18:11 > 0:18:13Right, let's see what this plant from Brazil
0:18:13 > 0:18:15brings forth in my consciousness, shall we?
0:18:15 > 0:18:17But also, let's hope it's not another
0:18:17 > 0:18:19of your long narrative poems.
0:18:30 > 0:18:33You have a return of your affliction.
0:18:33 > 0:18:34It's easily remedied.
0:18:34 > 0:18:36Brandy, please, Nurse.
0:18:39 > 0:18:42What happened in the South China Sea, Robert?
0:18:43 > 0:18:45On the Medusa?
0:18:48 > 0:18:50You don't ever talk about that time.
0:18:50 > 0:18:52I'm doing someone's tumour now.
0:18:52 > 0:18:55Perhaps that time is the cause of your affliction.
0:18:55 > 0:18:58Do you ever think about that?
0:18:58 > 0:19:00We're going to commence, Mr Steadman.
0:19:00 > 0:19:04Perhaps if you talked to others about your travails then,
0:19:04 > 0:19:07it may help to ease the burden of them.
0:19:07 > 0:19:08Blade, please, Nurse.
0:19:11 > 0:19:15You were posted as a surgical officer on the HMS Vengeance
0:19:15 > 0:19:16during the Opium War.
0:19:20 > 0:19:22Very well, I'll tell you.
0:19:22 > 0:19:25It's a tale full of wonder...
0:19:25 > 0:19:27and horror, what happened.
0:19:29 > 0:19:30PATIENT GROANS
0:19:30 > 0:19:32In the October of 1839,
0:19:32 > 0:19:35our ship was attacked by a Chinese sea hawk off the coast of Hainan.
0:19:35 > 0:19:36Hook and scissors.
0:19:38 > 0:19:40They blew five holes in our side.
0:19:41 > 0:19:44I managed to get into a skiff before the ship went down.
0:19:44 > 0:19:48I sailed south alone, fleeing my pursuers.
0:19:48 > 0:19:51For two days, I floated rudderless and adrift
0:19:51 > 0:19:53in the straits of the Dutch Indies.
0:19:54 > 0:19:56Eventually, I ran my boat aground
0:19:56 > 0:19:59on a meagre strip of land barely 100 yards long...
0:19:59 > 0:20:01with one single palm tree.
0:20:02 > 0:20:04I had no idea of my position.
0:20:04 > 0:20:06The skiff was irreparable...
0:20:07 > 0:20:10..and that evening, I made a terrible discovery.
0:20:11 > 0:20:14A human skull buried in the sand at one end of the island.
0:20:16 > 0:20:20With no means of escape, I resigned myself to living on this sand spit
0:20:20 > 0:20:22until rescue arrived...
0:20:22 > 0:20:25or I was eaten by the passing cannibals.
0:20:28 > 0:20:32I survived by tackling and eating any pelicans that came to land.
0:20:32 > 0:20:35Have you ever tackled a pelican, William?
0:20:37 > 0:20:39It's an appalling business.
0:20:40 > 0:20:43To keep myself sane, I practised acrobatics,
0:20:43 > 0:20:47and whittled a flute from the palm tree.
0:20:47 > 0:20:49The topic can be of your choosing.
0:20:49 > 0:20:53I could talk about the blessed benefits of ether and chloroform.
0:20:53 > 0:20:55I'd say that'd have the young 'uns on the edge of their seat.
0:20:55 > 0:20:58I'm sorry, Rosie. We're going to have to meet up again later.
0:20:58 > 0:21:00Besides, this plant's done nothing.
0:21:00 > 0:21:02It's like the time I smoked begonias.
0:21:02 > 0:21:04Come along, sir.
0:21:06 > 0:21:07Lead on, Mr Peters!
0:21:09 > 0:21:11In time, I learned how to ride turtles.
0:21:11 > 0:21:14I discovered that if you swam astride a turtle,
0:21:14 > 0:21:16they could carry you,
0:21:16 > 0:21:18and you could steer them by poking them in the opposite eye
0:21:18 > 0:21:20of the direction you wanted to go in.
0:21:20 > 0:21:23If you wanted them to stop, place your hands over both eyes.
0:21:23 > 0:21:25Silk, please.
0:21:28 > 0:21:31I'd been marooned alone for four months.
0:21:31 > 0:21:33Just as I was giving up all hope...
0:21:35 > 0:21:37..a catamaran appeared...
0:21:38 > 0:21:40..with local huntsmen on it.
0:21:41 > 0:21:45I knew that these people offered me my only possible means of escape.
0:21:49 > 0:21:51I waved to them.
0:21:58 > 0:21:59Good morning to you all.
0:21:59 > 0:22:01Good afternoon to you all.
0:22:01 > 0:22:03My name is John Sutton.
0:22:03 > 0:22:05I am an experienced dentist,
0:22:05 > 0:22:07and I've spent the last few months
0:22:07 > 0:22:09experimenting with a variety of drugs
0:22:09 > 0:22:12that I think will greatly benefit surgical patients.
0:22:12 > 0:22:15I would like to describe to you today
0:22:15 > 0:22:20both the various possible delivery methods for ether and chloroform...
0:22:20 > 0:22:22HE PANTS
0:22:22 > 0:22:24..as well as...
0:22:24 > 0:22:27HE PANTS
0:22:27 > 0:22:31their...their...their... their...various...effects.
0:22:31 > 0:22:33HE GASPS
0:22:45 > 0:22:47HE WHEEZES
0:22:53 > 0:22:54Whoo...
0:22:54 > 0:22:55HE SIGHS
0:22:56 > 0:22:58HE WHEEZES
0:23:00 > 0:23:02Surgery.
0:23:04 > 0:23:07Certainly more entertaining than one of Mr Lessing's lectures.
0:23:09 > 0:23:10HE SCREAMS
0:23:20 > 0:23:22Thank you for coming.
0:23:23 > 0:23:26These natives had never seen a white man before,
0:23:26 > 0:23:28and they took me to be a reincarnated form
0:23:28 > 0:23:29of their dead king.
0:23:29 > 0:23:31They sailed me to their island,
0:23:31 > 0:23:33and crowned me during a 14-day ceremony,
0:23:33 > 0:23:36which featured much drinking, dancing, and feathered headdresses.
0:23:36 > 0:23:39They daubed me with paint, and offered me a choice of wives.
0:23:39 > 0:23:42Although I was engaged to Caroline at that point,
0:23:42 > 0:23:45I feared that my survival depended on assimilating with these people,
0:23:45 > 0:23:46so, out of etiquette,
0:23:46 > 0:23:49I chose six or seven of their young women as wives,
0:23:49 > 0:23:51and slept with them on alternating nights.
0:23:51 > 0:23:55I spent nine months with these people, learning their customs.
0:23:55 > 0:23:58Fishing, hunting, and mastering their language
0:23:58 > 0:24:00of slaps, clicks and whistles.
0:24:00 > 0:24:03For instance, this... CLICKS, WHISTLES AND CLAPS
0:24:03 > 0:24:05..means "I don't need another mango juice".
0:24:05 > 0:24:07Scissors.
0:24:08 > 0:24:10All the while...
0:24:10 > 0:24:12despite the many attractions
0:24:12 > 0:24:15of their noble and primitive way of life,
0:24:15 > 0:24:17I was planning my escape back to civilisation.
0:24:17 > 0:24:19Thank you, Mr Steadman.
0:24:31 > 0:24:33Eventually, I saw another ship passing near.
0:24:35 > 0:24:37A 170-foot clipper.
0:24:38 > 0:24:40The Medusa.
0:24:41 > 0:24:44I left my wives, who were having a fruit picnic,
0:24:44 > 0:24:47and swam out to the ship as fast as I could.
0:24:47 > 0:24:49The men pulled me on board.
0:24:51 > 0:24:54Initially, due to my tan, driftwood earring and tropical skirt,
0:24:54 > 0:24:56they mistook me for a local.
0:24:56 > 0:24:57They were about to shoot me.
0:24:57 > 0:24:59But I proved to them I was English
0:24:59 > 0:25:02by reciting the second verse of God Save The Queen.
0:25:05 > 0:25:07But the crew of the Medusa were a rough bunch...
0:25:09 > 0:25:10..and I...
0:25:14 > 0:25:16I, er...
0:25:20 > 0:25:21I don't want to talk about it.
0:25:21 > 0:25:23What happened?
0:25:23 > 0:25:25- You CAN tell me.- No.
0:25:26 > 0:25:28No, I mustn't.
0:25:28 > 0:25:30You can.
0:25:33 > 0:25:35I'm making it all up.
0:25:35 > 0:25:37You can't ride turtles.
0:25:37 > 0:25:39Told you I didn't want to talk about it.
0:25:39 > 0:25:42Well, until you do learn to talk freely about what happened,
0:25:42 > 0:25:46I think you'll continue to suffer from nightmares and shakes.
0:25:46 > 0:25:48And drink is not the solution.
0:25:52 > 0:25:54Do you still want me to do your lithotrity?
0:25:55 > 0:25:57Yes.
0:25:57 > 0:26:00But I'm very angry with you about that story.
0:26:00 > 0:26:04Just let me make it up to you by crushing your bladder stone.
0:26:04 > 0:26:06I thought John was going to be joining us.
0:26:06 > 0:26:07Here I am!
0:26:07 > 0:26:10I brought my chloroform. Have you brought your penis?
0:26:12 > 0:26:14What on earth have you been taking, John?
0:26:14 > 0:26:16You're sweating like a hippo!
0:26:16 > 0:26:19It's an unnamed jungle plant. It's very good.
0:26:19 > 0:26:21I'll get you some.
0:26:21 > 0:26:23I've been thinking...
0:26:23 > 0:26:26rather than use drugs, I would like to try mesmerism.
0:26:26 > 0:26:29- Very well. What do I do?- I'll do it.
0:26:29 > 0:26:31I thought you didn't believe in this twaddle?
0:26:31 > 0:26:33I was very interested in what happened to Caroline
0:26:33 > 0:26:35- when that Indian started stroking her.- I beg your pardon?
0:26:35 > 0:26:37What went on?
0:26:37 > 0:26:38WHISPERS: Drugs.
0:26:38 > 0:26:42I'm open to anything that can bring about a change in consciousness.
0:26:44 > 0:26:46Let's try it.
0:26:47 > 0:26:48OK, fingers.
0:26:54 > 0:26:57Feel my energy course into you now.
0:26:58 > 0:26:59You feel sleepy.
0:26:59 > 0:27:02Your body is heavy.
0:27:02 > 0:27:05The world is falling away.
0:27:05 > 0:27:08This room dissolves around you.
0:27:09 > 0:27:15You're floating up, up, up, up, up, up and away.
0:27:15 > 0:27:17You're a seraph...
0:27:18 > 0:27:21..flying high above the world,
0:27:21 > 0:27:25floating on a cloud of calm consciousness.
0:27:27 > 0:27:29JOHN HUMS
0:27:36 > 0:27:39- WILLIAM HUMS - I stroke you into deepness.
0:27:42 > 0:27:43And now...
0:27:44 > 0:27:48...you're in a full...deep trance.
0:27:48 > 0:27:51A hot, heavy comfort.
0:27:51 > 0:27:54You are aware of me and of Robert...
0:27:54 > 0:27:56but you will feel no pain.
0:27:58 > 0:27:59And now you stand.
0:28:28 > 0:28:31HE SCREAMS
0:28:31 > 0:28:34Give me some shitting drugs now!