Episode 4

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0:00:02 > 0:00:09This programme contains strong language

0:00:17 > 0:00:21- GROUP CHANTING:- Hey! Hey! Ho! Ho! Karaoke's got to go!

0:00:21 > 0:00:24Hey! Hey! Ho! Ho! Karaoke's got to go!

0:00:24 > 0:00:28Hey! Hey! Ho! Ho! Karaoke's got to go! Hey...

0:00:28 > 0:00:30Man, white people love protesting.

0:00:30 > 0:00:32There's, like, shit going down here every other day.

0:00:32 > 0:00:34Stop cultural appropriation!

0:00:34 > 0:00:36Stop karaoke night!

0:00:36 > 0:00:38You've never felt injustice you had to stand up for?

0:00:38 > 0:00:40Even if I did, I can't do anything about it.

0:00:40 > 0:00:43My student visa conditions prevent me from participating

0:00:43 > 0:00:45- in political protests. - No, that can't be true.

0:00:45 > 0:00:48- Yeah, it is.- Wow.

0:00:48 > 0:00:50I had no idea you were living under this oppression.

0:00:50 > 0:00:52You're living under this oppression too.

0:00:52 > 0:00:55- What do you mean?- You're here on a student visa, right?- Yeah, so?

0:00:55 > 0:00:58- That means you're an international student.- Yeah, but I'm American, OK?

0:00:58 > 0:00:59Our rights travel with us.

0:00:59 > 0:01:01No, that's not how it works.

0:01:01 > 0:01:04Hey, guys. Guys, can I get you to keep walking, cos we're just

0:01:04 > 0:01:05going to shut down this protest?

0:01:05 > 0:01:07Yeah. It's fine, we're not protesting.

0:01:07 > 0:01:10That doesn't matter. I just need you to move on so we can clear the area.

0:01:10 > 0:01:12Or else, what, you're going to beat the shit out of us?

0:01:12 > 0:01:14No, I'm just asking you to move on, mate.

0:01:14 > 0:01:17It's OK. I'm sorry, he just doesn't like people telling him what to do.

0:01:17 > 0:01:21Yo, I will move when I'm goddamn ready to move and not one second earlier.

0:01:21 > 0:01:24- No, I reckon you'll start moving right now, champ.- Oh, yeah?

0:01:41 > 0:01:43- You just going to stand here all day now?- Yeah,

0:01:43 > 0:01:45you can't let people with no authority

0:01:45 > 0:01:47push you around, that's how dictatorships happen.

0:01:47 > 0:01:50OK, Malcolm X. Come on. Let's go before your visa gets cancelled.

0:01:50 > 0:01:53OK, but I'm only moving right now because I choose to,

0:01:53 > 0:01:55not because I'm following your instructions.

0:01:55 > 0:01:56Yeah, whatever, arsehole!

0:02:08 > 0:02:09Oh, hey, look, they opened a bubble tea place

0:02:09 > 0:02:11right next to where Asher works.

0:02:11 > 0:02:14Bubble tea? What the hell is bubble tea?

0:02:14 > 0:02:17- Bubble tea, you've never had bubble tea before?- No.

0:02:17 > 0:02:18What's that floating black shit?

0:02:18 > 0:02:20It's pearls.

0:02:20 > 0:02:22What the fuck, man? Pearls aren't for eating.

0:02:22 > 0:02:23They're made of tapioca, you idiot.

0:02:23 > 0:02:26Still. God, it looks like something from Fear Factor.

0:02:26 > 0:02:27Do you get that reference?

0:02:27 > 0:02:30Yeah, no-one's asking you to try it, all right?

0:02:30 > 0:02:31No offence, man, it does not look good.

0:02:31 > 0:02:34You left America to not experience any other cultures?

0:02:34 > 0:02:37- Yeah, that makes sense.- You saying I'm not game to try anything new?

0:02:37 > 0:02:39Yeah. I'm saying that drink has more balls than you do.

0:02:46 > 0:02:48- Hello?- Hi.

0:02:48 > 0:02:50- Hey.- Thanks for stopping by.

0:02:50 > 0:02:53- Yeah, no problem.- Ooh, do you want some raw almonds?- No, I'm OK.

0:02:54 > 0:02:57Is this a shop, or where people dump their used food?

0:02:57 > 0:02:59Oh, not fancy enough for you?

0:02:59 > 0:03:00Fancy? It's a hygiene issue.

0:03:00 > 0:03:02People are going to eat this, right?

0:03:02 > 0:03:04As long as I've been here, we've never had any complaints.

0:03:04 > 0:03:07Maybe because everyone died immediately after eating it.

0:03:07 > 0:03:08Why's it so grubby?

0:03:08 > 0:03:11Oh, my God, look, the fruit, someone took a bite out of this.

0:03:11 > 0:03:15- And why does everything look like it's been dragged through the mud? - Because it's farm to table.

0:03:15 > 0:03:17More like shit to mouth.

0:03:17 > 0:03:20This is where socially conscious people on a budget shop.

0:03:20 > 0:03:21Well, why are there no price tags?

0:03:21 > 0:03:23How do you know how much anything costs?

0:03:23 > 0:03:24It's pay what you feel.

0:03:26 > 0:03:28Pay what you feel?

0:03:28 > 0:03:29Yeah, we have a donation bowl.

0:03:29 > 0:03:32OK, so your business model is begging.

0:03:32 > 0:03:34Got it. So then why do you even need to be here?

0:03:34 > 0:03:36It's just a job, Ronny. Calm down.

0:03:36 > 0:03:37PHONE CHIMES

0:03:39 > 0:03:41- Oh, shit.- What?

0:03:41 > 0:03:44I totally forgot I have a meeting with Professor Dale right now to

0:03:44 > 0:03:47- discuss my last essay.- So, go.

0:03:47 > 0:03:48I have to tell him I can't make it.

0:03:48 > 0:03:50What, because of this?

0:03:51 > 0:03:53No, no, no. Your first job is being a student.

0:03:53 > 0:03:55You can't wreck a 100,000 degree to make, like...

0:03:56 > 0:03:58..what, 20 bucks an hour?

0:03:59 > 0:04:0015?

0:04:04 > 0:04:06Coin and half a muffin?

0:04:06 > 0:04:09- Well, then, what are you even doing here?- I need this job.

0:04:09 > 0:04:11You don't work and your parents pay for everything.

0:04:11 > 0:04:14I can't do uni work if I'm homeless and starving.

0:04:14 > 0:04:17Wait, hang on, how about I just cover your shift for the day?

0:04:17 > 0:04:18It's harder than you think.

0:04:18 > 0:04:20What if you fuck something up?

0:04:20 > 0:04:23There is an open vat of self-serve yoghurt with animal hair in it.

0:04:23 > 0:04:27- I don't think I can fuck it up any more.- All right. All right.

0:04:28 > 0:04:30I got this. Trust me, I got it.

0:04:30 > 0:04:33- Go, go, go, go, go.- I'll tell Todd you're covering my shift for me.

0:04:33 > 0:04:35Just...please don't get me fired.

0:04:35 > 0:04:37- Trust me, I got this. - I'll be back in an hour, tops.

0:04:37 > 0:04:40- Take the whole day if you want. - We'll see about that.

0:04:40 > 0:04:44- Just stand behind the counter and help customers.- What, I can't help customers from the front?

0:04:44 > 0:04:45I'm joking. I'm just joking.

0:04:45 > 0:04:47See, behind the counter.

0:04:47 > 0:04:49Go, go, go, I got it.

0:05:09 > 0:05:10What IS this?!

0:05:10 > 0:05:12What is grass jelly?

0:05:12 > 0:05:15Red bean...and tea?

0:05:15 > 0:05:16What the fuck?!

0:05:17 > 0:05:18Oh, hey, Wei Jun.

0:05:19 > 0:05:21So, what's good here?

0:05:21 > 0:05:23Uh...bubble tea.

0:05:23 > 0:05:25Yeah, right? I'm really up for something exotic today.

0:05:25 > 0:05:29Really want to experience some international culture.

0:05:29 > 0:05:30What are you having?

0:05:30 > 0:05:34Uh, taro milk tea with taro pudding.

0:05:34 > 0:05:36Yeah, I'll get one too.

0:05:36 > 0:05:37First time for everything, right?

0:05:37 > 0:05:40Hey, can I get two taro milks?

0:05:40 > 0:05:42You want pearls?

0:05:42 > 0:05:45Yeah, sure. You know what? Extra pearls.

0:05:45 > 0:05:48Go hard or go home, right? Put that shit in.

0:05:49 > 0:05:50Keep the change.

0:05:52 > 0:05:53Thank you.

0:05:56 > 0:06:00Cheers, everyone. To international experiences.

0:06:04 > 0:06:07- VOICEOVER:- Wait, what is this taste?

0:06:07 > 0:06:11It's so creamy, but sweet.

0:06:11 > 0:06:13And the pearls,

0:06:13 > 0:06:14chewy and refreshing.

0:06:16 > 0:06:18I've never had anything like this before.

0:06:18 > 0:06:20It's... It's... It's...

0:06:20 > 0:06:25..amaaaziiing!

0:06:25 > 0:06:27What are you doing?

0:06:29 > 0:06:30Get down.

0:06:32 > 0:06:34These animals.

0:06:34 > 0:06:37Paying for stuff with string. What the fuck is this?

0:06:37 > 0:06:38Ah!

0:06:38 > 0:06:41Oh, sorry, I don't have any spare change, but feel free to take

0:06:41 > 0:06:44whatever rotting fruit you want.

0:06:44 > 0:06:47I'm Todd. Asher told me you were taking over her shift.

0:06:47 > 0:06:49Oh, Todd. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

0:06:49 > 0:06:52Thanks for letting me take over on such short notice.

0:06:52 > 0:06:56No problem. So, what kind of retail experience do you have?

0:06:56 > 0:07:00Uh, well, I've been in lots of shops and I'm a really quick learner,

0:07:00 > 0:07:02and I'm great at following instructions.

0:07:02 > 0:07:05OK. Well, how about you start with the produce over here?

0:07:06 > 0:07:09- Oh, like, stacking it? - No, rubbing dirt on it.

0:07:11 > 0:07:13People love that organic fresh-from-the-ground feel

0:07:13 > 0:07:15with their produce.

0:07:16 > 0:07:20OK, here's a crazy suggestion.

0:07:20 > 0:07:23I think more people would buy the produce

0:07:23 > 0:07:26if it looked clean and edible.

0:07:26 > 0:07:29- Just putting it out there. - Are we going to have a problem here? Because Asher vouched for you.

0:07:29 > 0:07:32No, yeah, yeah, of course. I'm sorry, you're right. Whatever you want.

0:07:32 > 0:07:35I'll rub whatever you want onto anything... You're in charge.

0:07:35 > 0:07:39But when you're done with the produce, if you really want to clean something, you can deal with

0:07:39 > 0:07:41the self-serve grain station over here.

0:07:41 > 0:07:43Oh, you want me to throw that shit out?

0:07:43 > 0:07:45- Yeah, no problem.- No, I want you to sort through it.

0:07:47 > 0:07:48You want me to...

0:07:50 > 0:07:52You want me to organise the grain?

0:07:56 > 0:07:58There's like a family of mice living in this.

0:07:58 > 0:08:00This is a hygiene situation. You've got to throw this out.

0:08:00 > 0:08:02I don't want you to throw anything out, OK?

0:08:02 > 0:08:05So, you want me to sort through this grain by grain?

0:08:05 > 0:08:08- That's going to take some time. - Yeah. No pain, no grain.

0:08:11 > 0:08:14Yo, can I get a passion fruit popping boba with pearls?

0:08:17 > 0:08:20Coconut grape jelly with pearls!

0:08:23 > 0:08:27Jasmine green milk with pearls.

0:08:27 > 0:08:29Mmm!

0:08:29 > 0:08:33Signature frozen hot chocolate with pearls.

0:08:34 > 0:08:37Grape coconut jelly popping boba.

0:08:37 > 0:08:39Huh, huh, huh!

0:08:39 > 0:08:40You want pearls?

0:08:40 > 0:08:42You're reading my mind, man.

0:08:49 > 0:08:51Can you please put your shirt back on?!

0:08:56 > 0:08:59How's it looking, Ronny Chieng?

0:08:59 > 0:09:02Well, the foxtail millet and the finger millet was a nightmare to separate.

0:09:02 > 0:09:03But I think I got the rest done.

0:09:03 > 0:09:08Nice work. I've got to split for a bit, but while I'm gone, I've got another job for you.

0:09:08 > 0:09:10- OK.- It would really help the store

0:09:10 > 0:09:12if you could hand-wash these bandanas.

0:09:12 > 0:09:14Is this personal or work-related?

0:09:14 > 0:09:15Oh, totally work-related.

0:09:15 > 0:09:18If I have to do it, I spend less time working in the store.

0:09:18 > 0:09:20OK, well, I don't know if your laundry

0:09:20 > 0:09:22is in my official job description.

0:09:22 > 0:09:24Hey, man, this is what working at a co-op is all about.

0:09:24 > 0:09:26Everyone has to play their part.

0:09:26 > 0:09:30So, can you play your part, or do I need to call Asher

0:09:30 > 0:09:31and get her back here?

0:09:33 > 0:09:35- No, I can do it.- Thanks, man, it really means a lot.

0:09:39 > 0:09:42Ronny! Um, have you got any jerky?

0:09:42 > 0:09:46I've got a couple of rough units coming round. We need to stock up.

0:09:46 > 0:09:49- Uh, if it's not on the shelf, we're out.- Oh, damn.

0:09:51 > 0:09:53Oh! I'll get some yoghurt.

0:09:55 > 0:09:56Um...

0:10:02 > 0:10:03SPLASH!

0:10:36 > 0:10:38- Is that chewing gum? - Yeah, spearmint.

0:10:38 > 0:10:40Enjoy.

0:10:51 > 0:10:53What are you doing?

0:10:54 > 0:10:55Gah...

0:10:56 > 0:10:58Oh, oh...

0:10:59 > 0:11:02Um, do you have a cloth?

0:11:02 > 0:11:03Or maybe a hessian sack?

0:11:03 > 0:11:08I have spilled a significant amount of yoggie on the floor.

0:11:08 > 0:11:10Yeah, you think?

0:11:10 > 0:11:13Do you know what? I've got this.

0:11:13 > 0:11:14A bit of DIY cleaning

0:11:14 > 0:11:17and it should be...

0:11:17 > 0:11:19You're just rubbing it into the carpet.

0:11:19 > 0:11:21- Just stop. - Do you have a plastic bag?

0:11:21 > 0:11:23This one's got a hole in it.

0:11:23 > 0:11:25Stop, man, dude, just go. Just go, man, don't worry about it.

0:11:27 > 0:11:29Oh, God, um...

0:11:30 > 0:11:31Sorry. Let me...

0:11:31 > 0:11:32Just get the fuck out!

0:11:32 > 0:11:34You're a goddamn animal, Mick!

0:11:39 > 0:11:42Who the fuck eats that much dairy?

0:11:45 > 0:11:47- ROBOTIC VOICE:- Intruder spotted!

0:11:49 > 0:11:50What show is this?

0:11:50 > 0:11:52Initiate fight sequence!

0:11:53 > 0:11:54Yaaaa!

0:11:54 > 0:11:56Hey, does anyone know what show this is?

0:11:58 > 0:11:59Ya!

0:11:59 > 0:12:01- Argh!- Argh!

0:12:01 > 0:12:03Hey!

0:12:04 > 0:12:05HEY!

0:12:06 > 0:12:07Hey, dumbass!

0:12:09 > 0:12:11- You talking to me?- Yeah, you.

0:12:11 > 0:12:14Super Dumbass. What the hell do you think you're doing?

0:12:14 > 0:12:18- Just chillin'. - Why are you chilling here?

0:12:18 > 0:12:21Because. I'm trying to experience international cultures.

0:12:23 > 0:12:25What the hell does that mean?

0:12:25 > 0:12:28I'm getting to know how international people live.

0:12:28 > 0:12:30OK. OK, OK, OK.

0:12:30 > 0:12:34Firstly, why do you keep calling them international?

0:12:34 > 0:12:36Because they are from other countries.

0:12:36 > 0:12:38And where are you from?

0:12:38 > 0:12:43- My country.- Yes, don't you see, you dumb fuck?

0:12:43 > 0:12:45You're not in your country now, therefore...

0:12:45 > 0:12:48What are you trying to say?

0:12:48 > 0:12:51I'm saying the real monster is cultural ignorance.

0:12:51 > 0:12:57You self-centred, jingoistic, egotistic, narcissistic idiot.

0:12:57 > 0:13:00- Idiot.- Idiot.- Idiot.- Idiot.- Idiot.

0:13:00 > 0:13:03"IDIOT" ECHOES

0:13:08 > 0:13:10- THROUGH MEGAPHONE: - Hey, Ronnie Chieng!

0:13:10 > 0:13:13Sorry, man, just testing this out.

0:13:13 > 0:13:14Got a real big protest this afternoon.

0:13:14 > 0:13:16What are you protesting - hearing?

0:13:16 > 0:13:18Social justice activism is a very important part

0:13:18 > 0:13:21of this co-op community. I'm not just here to make money.

0:13:21 > 0:13:23Well, that's good because you're not making any.

0:13:23 > 0:13:26Where's the...self-serve yoghurt?

0:13:27 > 0:13:29It got compromised, I had to throw it out.

0:13:31 > 0:13:33But I specifically told you not to throw stuff out.

0:13:33 > 0:13:35Yeah, but we had an incident when this guy...

0:13:35 > 0:13:38Look, man, Asher said I could trust you.

0:13:39 > 0:13:40Yes, you can.

0:13:40 > 0:13:43That's good. Because I've got a real important job for you.

0:13:43 > 0:13:45It's lunch hour now

0:13:45 > 0:13:48and I need you to put this on and do some marketing.

0:13:50 > 0:13:53- What is it?- It's our shop logo, it's a pile of almonds.

0:13:53 > 0:13:55Why didn't you just make it one big almond?

0:13:55 > 0:13:57When you make it a bag of almonds,

0:13:57 > 0:13:58it looks like someone took a shit in a bag.

0:13:58 > 0:14:00Either way, it definitely draws a crowd,

0:14:00 > 0:14:02so just put it on and hand out some free almonds.

0:14:04 > 0:14:07Yeah, you know what, Todd, I'm going to pass on this one.

0:14:07 > 0:14:11Mate... This is not really me asking, this is kind of an order.

0:14:13 > 0:14:15OK!

0:14:19 > 0:14:20Which way... How do you...

0:14:20 > 0:14:21That's the front.

0:14:22 > 0:14:24- And then, what, go under the... - Straight in.

0:14:28 > 0:14:30Free sample.

0:14:30 > 0:14:33You'd be nuts not to visit the co-op.

0:14:33 > 0:14:35That's a giant turd in a bag!

0:14:35 > 0:14:37I am actually a pile of almonds in a bag!

0:14:39 > 0:14:41Free sample.

0:14:41 > 0:14:44You'd be nuts not to visit the co-op.

0:14:44 > 0:14:46Oi! Fuck off, you nut fuck!

0:14:48 > 0:14:50You know, I understand that.

0:14:50 > 0:14:52I've been ignorant about being ignorant.

0:14:52 > 0:14:56I came here trying to experience international culture, but really,

0:14:56 > 0:14:58all that was happening was international people

0:14:58 > 0:15:00were just experiencing MY culture.

0:15:00 > 0:15:03I mean, I'm the foreigner here, you know what I mean?

0:15:06 > 0:15:09Also, why am I trying to cram the entire Asian experience

0:15:09 > 0:15:12into one day? I should be enjoying the journey.

0:15:13 > 0:15:16Breathing it in, taking my time.

0:15:16 > 0:15:18I mean, look at all this authentic Asian stuff.

0:15:18 > 0:15:23Actually, bubble tea is from Taiwan, that show is Japanese and

0:15:23 > 0:15:24I'm from the Philippines.

0:15:24 > 0:15:27Asian culture is not a monolith,

0:15:27 > 0:15:31so this place really isn't authentic anything.

0:15:31 > 0:15:33I am learning so much from you.

0:15:43 > 0:15:47Ronny Chieng. You look like nobody wants free almonds.

0:15:47 > 0:15:49Yeah, because nobody wants free almonds.

0:15:51 > 0:15:53But the thing is, almonds are a superfood,

0:15:53 > 0:15:56and right now you're really not giving off a super vibe.

0:15:56 > 0:15:59Well, maybe it's because I look like a big bag of shit

0:15:59 > 0:16:02and people think I'm trying to give them smaller pieces of shit.

0:16:02 > 0:16:06I'm sensing you're not really enjoying working here.

0:16:06 > 0:16:09- Oh, really?- Maybe you're just not good at following instructions.

0:16:10 > 0:16:15I have done everything you asked of me, including your personal errands.

0:16:15 > 0:16:17And also, are you a front for the Mafia?

0:16:17 > 0:16:19Because this place is run so badly,

0:16:19 > 0:16:22that's the only explanation I can think of of why it is still open.

0:16:22 > 0:16:24Have you been vaccinated?

0:16:24 > 0:16:25Cos I think you might be autistic.

0:16:27 > 0:16:30If you don't like it, you don't have to be here.

0:16:30 > 0:16:32Oh, OK, great, I'll just go, then.

0:16:32 > 0:16:36OK, but seeing as you're filling in for Asher, if you go,

0:16:36 > 0:16:38I guess that means she goes too.

0:16:41 > 0:16:43You know what, Todd, that's fine.

0:16:43 > 0:16:46I'm sure she can get a better job at a better place that knows how to

0:16:46 > 0:16:48respect its employees.

0:16:48 > 0:16:49Good day to you.

0:16:51 > 0:16:53MOBILE RINGS

0:16:58 > 0:17:00- Hello?- Hey, Ronny, I was just telling Professor Dale

0:17:00 > 0:17:03how lucky I was for you to cover my shift,

0:17:03 > 0:17:05cos we had a very productive meeting.

0:17:05 > 0:17:07Yeah, glad I could help.

0:17:07 > 0:17:09So, how was your first day of work?

0:17:09 > 0:17:11You haven't been fired yet, right(?)

0:17:11 > 0:17:15Yeah, I technically have not been fired...yet.

0:17:15 > 0:17:18But... Oh, great. I'm glad it's working out.

0:17:18 > 0:17:21To be honest, I was genuinely a little worried about you covering for me,

0:17:21 > 0:17:24just because it's really hard to find a job on campus.

0:17:24 > 0:17:27Yeah, but is it really, though? I feel like the economy is booming,

0:17:27 > 0:17:30plenty of shops opening up, you know, like the bubble tea place?

0:17:30 > 0:17:33Like, lots of other jobs are available, if you actually went to look, I'm sure you'd find...

0:17:33 > 0:17:35Maybe, but definitely not on campus.

0:17:35 > 0:17:37Everyone wants to work on campus.

0:17:37 > 0:17:39I'd hate to work off-campus.

0:17:39 > 0:17:42Can you just imagine how tough it would be to do that

0:17:42 > 0:17:43and make it to class?

0:17:43 > 0:17:45Yeah. Yeah, yeah, that would be tough.

0:17:45 > 0:17:48Yeah, I'm very lucky to get some shifts there.

0:17:48 > 0:17:50OK, I'm coming back right now.

0:17:50 > 0:17:51Just hold out a few more minutes.

0:17:51 > 0:17:53- Bye.- Bye!

0:17:57 > 0:17:58Shit!

0:18:07 > 0:18:09Hey, Todd,

0:18:09 > 0:18:11listen, I'm sorry about before.

0:18:11 > 0:18:14I shouldn't have quit. Please don't fire Asher because of me.

0:18:14 > 0:18:19I don't know, man, we are a very socially conscious group here,

0:18:19 > 0:18:22and we don't want...fuck heads in our group.

0:18:22 > 0:18:23I'm not a fuck head.

0:18:23 > 0:18:28I'm sorry. Please, give Asher back this job, I'll do whatever you want.

0:18:28 > 0:18:29That's great to hear.

0:18:29 > 0:18:34You know why? That protest I've been talking about all day is going down right now.

0:18:34 > 0:18:35We need as many people as we can get.

0:18:37 > 0:18:41Oh, OK, well, protesting is actually the one thing I can't do,

0:18:41 > 0:18:43it's against my student visa condition.

0:18:43 > 0:18:46What are you worried about? You've got the perfect disguise!

0:18:46 > 0:18:49No, it's way too risky. I could get kicked out the country.

0:18:49 > 0:18:51You know what else is risky?

0:18:51 > 0:18:55Working illegally on a student visa, like you've been doing all day.

0:18:55 > 0:18:59Wow, you're a bigger piece of shit than this costume.

0:18:59 > 0:19:01I'm not the one committing visa fraud.

0:19:01 > 0:19:02What are we protesting?

0:19:02 > 0:19:04The bubble tea shop.

0:19:04 > 0:19:08We are tired of multinational corporations coming onto this campus and

0:19:08 > 0:19:10turning it into a soulless strip mall.

0:19:10 > 0:19:13But the bubble tea place is like the only Asian dessert place on campus.

0:19:13 > 0:19:16Don't you think a bunch of white people protesting it could look bad?

0:19:16 > 0:19:21Ronny Chieng. Of course we appreciate how sensitive issues of race can be.

0:19:21 > 0:19:23We'll be very respectful.

0:19:23 > 0:19:27OK, I've got the eggs, let's bomb these bastards back to where they came from!

0:19:27 > 0:19:29- ALL:- Yeah!

0:19:29 > 0:19:30Let's go!

0:19:30 > 0:19:34- PROTESTORS:- Hey! Hey! Ho! Ho! Multinational corporations have got to go!

0:19:34 > 0:19:39Hey! Hey! Ho! Ho! Multinational corporations have got to go!

0:19:39 > 0:19:44Hey! Hey! Ho! Ho! Multinational corporations have got to go!

0:19:44 > 0:19:47Hey! Hey! Ho! Ho! Multinational corporations have got to go!

0:19:47 > 0:19:49What the hell is going on out there?

0:19:49 > 0:19:54Multinational corporations are a stain on the fabric of this campus!

0:19:54 > 0:19:55- ALL:- Yeah!

0:19:55 > 0:20:00Do you know how many food miles is chalked up by a single bubble tea?

0:20:02 > 0:20:04It's a lot. OK?

0:20:04 > 0:20:07- ALL:- Yeah! - And everyone who drinks bubble tea

0:20:07 > 0:20:11is complicit in environmental pollution

0:20:11 > 0:20:13in the name of corporate greed.

0:20:13 > 0:20:15- ALL:- Yeah!

0:20:15 > 0:20:16Everyone, start posting now.

0:20:16 > 0:20:18Hashtag BurstYourBubbleTea.

0:20:18 > 0:20:21The first letter of each word's capitalised.

0:20:22 > 0:20:26Hey! Hey! Ho! Ho! Multinational corporations have got to go!

0:20:26 > 0:20:30Hey! Hey! Ho! Ho! Multinational corporations have got to go!

0:20:30 > 0:20:34Hey, you're being incredibly intolerant of international -

0:20:34 > 0:20:35I mean, Asian culture.

0:20:35 > 0:20:39Stop disrespecting one of the only piazzas of the Asian community!

0:20:39 > 0:20:43- ALL:- Booo! Booo!

0:20:49 > 0:20:52SLOWED DOWN BOOING

0:21:04 > 0:21:05Yah!

0:21:11 > 0:21:13Hey, hippies!

0:21:20 > 0:21:21Is that the best you can do?

0:21:26 > 0:21:29Raaaargh!

0:21:29 > 0:21:32Did you know almonds contain healthy fats?

0:21:32 > 0:21:34Fibre, protein, magnesium and vitamin E!

0:21:34 > 0:21:36No, cos they're too dry and they taste like shit!

0:21:36 > 0:21:38I reduce blood sugar and cholesterol levels

0:21:38 > 0:21:40and help reduce blood pressure!

0:21:40 > 0:21:42Ah-ha-a-ha-ha!

0:21:42 > 0:21:44Ah-ha-a-ha-ha!

0:21:44 > 0:21:46Yaaaaah!

0:21:47 > 0:21:49Not so fast.

0:21:49 > 0:21:52How about a free taste... of my nuts?!

0:22:04 > 0:22:07Self-serve yoghurt blaster, engage!

0:22:08 > 0:22:12Noooooo!

0:22:13 > 0:22:17Aaaargh!

0:22:17 > 0:22:18Argh!

0:22:18 > 0:22:20What's going on here?

0:22:22 > 0:22:24Ronny Chieng from International House?

0:22:24 > 0:22:27Are you participating in a protest?

0:22:27 > 0:22:28Because that is a direct violation

0:22:28 > 0:22:30of your international student visa conditions.

0:22:31 > 0:22:33Uh, no, I'm just having a fight.

0:22:33 > 0:22:35Oh, OK, then.

0:22:40 > 0:22:42Ooh, yeah!

0:22:44 > 0:22:46Looks like our work here is done.

0:22:48 > 0:22:50What are you talking about? You all got your asses kicked by one guy.

0:22:50 > 0:22:53Yeah. I just got ten likes in four minutes.

0:22:53 > 0:22:56It's official, this protest has gone viral!

0:22:56 > 0:22:58- ALL:- Yeah! Yeah!

0:22:59 > 0:23:01But your protest doesn't change a thing.

0:23:01 > 0:23:04Come on, I just found out that international students aren't allowed to protest.

0:23:04 > 0:23:08- Booo!- It's racist and a direct violation of human rights.

0:23:08 > 0:23:11Let's go to the Vice Chancellor's office and tell her this is not OK.

0:23:11 > 0:23:14- ALL:- Yeah! Hey! Hey! Ho! Ho!

0:23:14 > 0:23:18International student visa limitations on freedom of speech have got to go!

0:23:18 > 0:23:23Give international students a voice! Let their voice be heard.

0:23:23 > 0:23:25Ronny, what the hell's going on here?

0:23:25 > 0:23:27Hey, your job sucks.

0:23:27 > 0:23:29Let their voice be heard!

0:23:29 > 0:23:32- What?- I said, man, your job sucks!

0:23:32 > 0:23:35I told you it would be harder than you thought.

0:23:35 > 0:23:37But, hey, thank you so much for covering for me,

0:23:37 > 0:23:39it was really productive.

0:23:40 > 0:23:42Yeah, no problems, easy, any time.

0:23:42 > 0:23:44Oh, my head.

0:23:45 > 0:23:47I blacked out.

0:23:47 > 0:23:49- What happened?- What happened?

0:23:49 > 0:23:51You went ballistic and fought everyone.

0:23:51 > 0:23:52With yoghurt.

0:23:52 > 0:23:56I'm sorry, man, I was just trying to have an international experience,

0:23:56 > 0:23:58but I drank way too much bubble tea

0:23:58 > 0:24:00and I think I attacked a bunch of people.

0:24:00 > 0:24:02So I don't know what I experienced.

0:24:02 > 0:24:05Well, you drank too much and got into a fight.

0:24:06 > 0:24:09Mate, it sounds like you just experienced Australian culture.

0:24:09 > 0:24:10Oh, yeah.

0:24:10 > 0:24:13- IN BAD AUSTRALIAN ACCENT: - Cheers, mate!

0:24:14 > 0:24:15- BOTH:- Cheers.