0:00:08 > 0:00:13'Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the celebrity showbiz quiz Shooting Stars.
0:00:13 > 0:00:17'And here are your hosts for this evening, Vic Reeves and Bob Mortimer!'
0:00:17 > 0:00:19CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:00:21 > 0:00:22Whey!
0:00:23 > 0:00:27BOTH: # Did you hear about the terrible shipwreck
0:00:27 > 0:00:30# No survivors, a bulletin said
0:00:30 > 0:00:33# But there on the horizon kicking like a bastard
0:00:33 > 0:00:36BOTH: # A floating meringue with a hat on his head
0:00:36 > 0:00:40- # Puff Daddy - # Swimming from the shipwreck
0:00:40 > 0:00:43- # Puff Daddy - # Kicking like a good 'un
0:00:43 > 0:00:46- # It's Puff Daddy - # Nibbling on a Mars Bar
0:00:47 > 0:00:51BOTH: # How the hell does he float
0:00:51 > 0:00:55# When he's wearing that coat?
0:00:57 > 0:01:00- Yeah! - BOTH: # So come along
0:01:00 > 0:01:04# And let's start shooting stars
0:01:04 > 0:01:07- # Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh - Yah!
0:01:07 > 0:01:11CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:01:13 > 0:01:18- It's Micky Flanagan! - CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:01:18 > 0:01:22Code name Dr Bananas, it's Mani!
0:01:22 > 0:01:25CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:01:27 > 0:01:29Oh, yes, it's Ulrika.
0:01:29 > 0:01:33She'll buy any car-car-car-car
0:01:33 > 0:01:37- car-car-car-car-car! - APPLAUSE
0:01:37 > 0:01:41The Jack Dee Sausages For Sailors Appeal.
0:01:41 > 0:01:43LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE
0:01:43 > 0:01:46CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:01:46 > 0:01:51Charlie "How's your hernia?" Higson!
0:01:51 > 0:01:54CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:01:58 > 0:02:00And finally,
0:02:00 > 0:02:03for your observation and assessment,
0:02:03 > 0:02:07- Tamzin Outhwaite! - BONGOS BEAT
0:02:07 > 0:02:10APPLAUSE
0:02:11 > 0:02:13Careful.
0:02:13 > 0:02:17Good evening, ladies... Good evening, ladies and gentlemen,
0:02:17 > 0:02:20boys and girls, and welcome to Shooting Stars.
0:02:20 > 0:02:23- LAUGHTER - Oh!
0:02:23 > 0:02:26- Do you need any help there, Vic? - If you wouldn't mind.
0:02:26 > 0:02:29- Of course! - LAUGHTER
0:02:29 > 0:02:31Just hold her there.
0:02:34 > 0:02:38BIRD SQUAWKS
0:02:38 > 0:02:40LAUGHTER
0:02:40 > 0:02:44And that's the easiest way to obtain an egg.
0:02:44 > 0:02:47- LAUGHTER - Vic, not just the easiest way, but the only way.
0:02:47 > 0:02:51I've been in all the suburbs of Johannesburg and confirmed this.
0:02:51 > 0:02:55- LAUGHTER - That's our egg requirement sorted out,
0:02:55 > 0:02:57but where's the man who'll keep the scores?
0:02:57 > 0:03:00He's over there by the beef burgers!
0:03:00 > 0:03:05BOTH: It's Angelos Epithemiou!
0:03:05 > 0:03:07RAP BEATS
0:03:09 > 0:03:12# Show respect, I'm Angelos E
0:03:12 > 0:03:15# And I'm gonna tell you how it's gonna be
0:03:15 > 0:03:17# I don't care if you come from Mars
0:03:17 > 0:03:20# Sit back, relax, watch Shooting Stars
0:03:20 > 0:03:22# We got Ulrika, the beauty, the gorgeous Swede
0:03:22 > 0:03:25# And the Jack, the grump what's permanently peed
0:03:25 > 0:03:27# Together here, as you can see
0:03:27 > 0:03:30# With a varying degree of celebrity
0:03:30 > 0:03:33# But your hosts tonight are thick as thieves
0:03:33 > 0:03:37# Ladies and gentlemen, it's Mr Mortimer and Reeves!
0:03:37 > 0:03:40Thank you! CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:03:41 > 0:03:44Thank you, Angelos.
0:03:44 > 0:03:46- Ahh.- Angelos!- What?
0:03:46 > 0:03:49That was really something, that song.
0:03:49 > 0:03:51Yeah, whatever. Respect is due.
0:03:51 > 0:03:54- CARTOON-STYLE FANFARE - Whoa!
0:03:54 > 0:03:56LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE
0:03:56 > 0:03:59Lovely to have you on board, Angelos.
0:03:59 > 0:04:02- Team B here. Micky, nice to see you. - Nice to see you.
0:04:02 > 0:04:06- Comedian, of course.- Yep.- But you haven't always been a comedian.
0:04:06 > 0:04:08- I have.- Have you? Oh, right.
0:04:08 > 0:04:12- They just made me do other stuff. - But you've done other stuff.
0:04:12 > 0:04:15- You've been a fishmonger.- Porter.
0:04:15 > 0:04:18- Fish porter?- Yeah. - You were also a dishwasher.
0:04:18 > 0:04:22Yeah. I know people laugh about dishwashers, but when I was a dishwasher,
0:04:22 > 0:04:25the boss, I was in America as a dishwasher, he came over to me and he said,
0:04:25 > 0:04:29"Micky, I know you don't think this is an important job,
0:04:29 > 0:04:31"but you're like the kitchen's asshole."
0:04:31 > 0:04:33LAUGHTER
0:04:33 > 0:04:36"If you stop working, this place is finished."
0:04:36 > 0:04:40LAUGHTER
0:04:40 > 0:04:43And if you think about it, that's right.
0:04:43 > 0:04:46And then you went to Hollywood, of course,
0:04:46 > 0:04:50where you played a gynaecologist in the mini-series Clam Club.
0:04:50 > 0:04:52- Yeah.- Clam Clinic.
0:04:52 > 0:04:54Oh, Clam Clinic! I do apologise.
0:04:54 > 0:04:57- LAUGHTER - Clam Clinic.
0:04:57 > 0:05:02- Happy days? - It was fantastic. Yeah, there are so many openings for you out there.
0:05:02 > 0:05:06- LAUGHTER - Micky, here's your question. True or false?
0:05:06 > 0:05:11True of false - Dog The Bounty Hunter is allergic to coconut?
0:05:11 > 0:05:15LAUGHTER
0:05:17 > 0:05:22- True or false?- I would say no. How could he hunt for Bounties?
0:05:22 > 0:05:26He's not allergic to coconut. Sadly, ironically, his dog is.
0:05:26 > 0:05:28LAUGHTER
0:05:28 > 0:05:35- Mani! Now then, Mani, you are a keen trout fisherman.- Indeed I am.
0:05:35 > 0:05:40- Aren't you?- Yes.- Sometimes I wake up in the morning thinking about you and your trout fishing.
0:05:40 > 0:05:43And I imagine you catching a trout.
0:05:43 > 0:05:48So I did a sketch of you and this is how I see you when you've caught a trout.
0:05:48 > 0:05:50LAUGHTER
0:05:50 > 0:05:52I find that to be mildly erotic.
0:05:52 > 0:05:55This is how I picture you.
0:05:55 > 0:05:58And I think I'm probably quite near the truth.
0:05:58 > 0:06:02I may be a little overdressed, but...
0:06:02 > 0:06:05TRUMPET FANFARE
0:06:05 > 0:06:08LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE Yes.
0:06:08 > 0:06:10APPLAUSE
0:06:10 > 0:06:13That's how I finish off my fantasy.
0:06:13 > 0:06:15- LAUGHTER - By blowing one off?
0:06:15 > 0:06:19Yeah. Anyway, Mani, I'm going to give you a question in a minute,
0:06:19 > 0:06:23but first of all, I'd like you to meet a young friend of mine.
0:06:23 > 0:06:27- Archie Andrews.- Oh, it's Archie!
0:06:27 > 0:06:32Archie's got a little present for you. He's going to walk towards you with a present. Here he comes.
0:06:32 > 0:06:35MYSTERIOUS MUSIC
0:06:38 > 0:06:42LAUGHTER
0:06:42 > 0:06:44There's Archie.
0:06:44 > 0:06:48- Got a little something for you. - Should I take it?- Have a look, yeah.
0:06:52 > 0:06:56HE LAUGHS
0:06:56 > 0:06:58IN AMERICAN ACCENT: Hi, Mani, I'm Archie Andrews.
0:06:58 > 0:07:03I'm just a two-bit pornographer, but hey, we've all got to make a living, right?
0:07:03 > 0:07:05Anyway, here's your question, asshole.
0:07:05 > 0:07:08LAUGHTER
0:07:08 > 0:07:12True or false - Ulrika has a little Johnson.
0:07:12 > 0:07:14LAUGHTER
0:07:14 > 0:07:17APPLAUSE
0:07:17 > 0:07:21Er, judging by this photograph, I would say that is so untrue.
0:07:21 > 0:07:25- LAUGHTER - That's not her.- Oh, right, sorry!
0:07:25 > 0:07:27LAUGHTER
0:07:27 > 0:07:31LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE
0:07:31 > 0:07:34- Goodbye, Mani.- Goodbye.- Forever.
0:07:34 > 0:07:40- Forever.- Archie Andrews, the tiny little pornographer!
0:07:40 > 0:07:43APPLAUSE
0:07:43 > 0:07:47Did you enjoy meeting Archie Andrews, Mani?
0:07:47 > 0:07:52- Not as much as I enjoyed having this to add to my rapidly-expanding collection.- Put that in your wallet.
0:07:52 > 0:07:54It's in there.
0:07:54 > 0:07:57Ulrika-ka-ka-ka.
0:07:57 > 0:07:59LAUGHTER
0:07:59 > 0:08:04- Ulrika! Lovely to see you, thanks for turning up once again.- Ulrika.
0:08:04 > 0:08:08Sorry, Mortimer. Ulrika, I bought you some shoes
0:08:08 > 0:08:13that I would very much like you to have and I'd love you to wear them.
0:08:13 > 0:08:17They mean a lot to me. They used to belong to my grandmother
0:08:17 > 0:08:21and they were the only pair of shoes that she owned.
0:08:21 > 0:08:26- So I want you to have them. - What, Angelos, did she leave them to you in her will?
0:08:26 > 0:08:29No, she's still alive. She can't go outside.
0:08:29 > 0:08:34- It's a nice thought, Ulrika, isn't it? - APPLAUSE
0:08:35 > 0:08:40True or false, Ulrika - Alan Sugar is actually 30 percent Canderel?
0:08:40 > 0:08:43LAUGHTER
0:08:43 > 0:08:47- I reckon that's true.- It is true!
0:08:47 > 0:08:53- And ten percent sea salt, which came as quite a surprise to his wife, Chocolene.- Choclene.
0:08:53 > 0:08:57Choclene. Just a detail Vic wanted me to include.
0:08:57 > 0:08:59LAUGHTER
0:08:59 > 0:09:02Jack, with your face like...
0:09:02 > 0:09:05- ROCK MUSIC - # Wolverine
0:09:05 > 0:09:08# Cutlery for fingers
0:09:09 > 0:09:13LAUGHTER
0:09:14 > 0:09:17- Suit yourself. - LAUGHTER
0:09:18 > 0:09:22With your face like a "Not Tonight Henry".
0:09:22 > 0:09:25LAUGHTER
0:09:25 > 0:09:27CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:09:29 > 0:09:33- Jack... - LAUGHTER
0:09:34 > 0:09:38- I don't know how you can talk to me like that every week.- I do.
0:09:38 > 0:09:41You're nothing to me. You know what you are?
0:09:41 > 0:09:43To me, you're like a safari park chimp...
0:09:43 > 0:09:46- LAUGHTER - ..jerking himself off...
0:09:46 > 0:09:49- Oh!- ..on the bonnet of my car
0:09:49 > 0:09:52when all I want to do is have a nice day out with the family.
0:09:52 > 0:09:55- That's what you are to me. - I'm sorry that that happened.
0:09:55 > 0:09:58LAUGHTER
0:09:58 > 0:10:01- APPLAUSE - And I've apologised.- Spoilt the day.
0:10:01 > 0:10:05- And it will never happen again, but you left your address.- Yes, it will.
0:10:05 > 0:10:08- LAUGHTER - Charlie! Charlie Higson, ladies and gentlemen,
0:10:08 > 0:10:11- author, comedian, it's an absolute privilege...- Who?- Sorry?
0:10:11 > 0:10:14- Who is he?- Charlie Higson.
0:10:14 > 0:10:18- Fast Show, that sort of thing. - LAUGHTER
0:10:18 > 0:10:22Charlie Higson, author and, er, comedian,
0:10:22 > 0:10:26- it's such a privilege to have you on here today. - It's just fantastic fun to be here.
0:10:26 > 0:10:28- I'm glad. - The coloured lights and the music
0:10:28 > 0:10:33- and the singing and the dancing. - Yes.- I'm really having a huge amount of fun.
0:10:33 > 0:10:36- LAUGHTER - Charlie, here's your question.
0:10:36 > 0:10:42Have a look at your monitor and can you identify the two celebrity fathers of this baby?
0:10:42 > 0:10:45LAUGHTER
0:10:45 > 0:10:48It's a bonny baby competition, Charlie.
0:10:48 > 0:10:51- Whoever you are. - LAUGHTER
0:10:51 > 0:10:56They look like the eyes of Jedward. The beard... Well, it could be Ricky Tomlinson.
0:10:56 > 0:10:59- You've got the right city with Tomlinson.- Is it a Beatle?
0:10:59 > 0:11:03- Don't know.- Yeah, it's Ringo Starr
0:11:03 > 0:11:07and, erm... Oh, it's Chris Evans.
0:11:07 > 0:11:09OK, well, let's find out.
0:11:09 > 0:11:13- LAUGHTER - Half right. Give him half a point, Angelos.
0:11:15 > 0:11:17- Tamzin! - LAUGHTER
0:11:17 > 0:11:21- VIC LAUGHS - Tamzin.
0:11:21 > 0:11:25- LAUGHTER - Oooh, Tamzin.
0:11:25 > 0:11:29Look, I'm a multi-instrumentalist
0:11:29 > 0:11:35and I've created a piece of music for you using all the instruments in the orchestra.
0:11:35 > 0:11:39- Do you want to hear it? It's in four or five movements. - Yeah.- OK.
0:11:39 > 0:11:42- Let's start with the guitar. - LAUGHTER
0:11:45 > 0:11:48COINS RATTLE
0:11:50 > 0:11:53LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE
0:11:59 > 0:12:02I'm going to move straight onto the second movement.
0:12:05 > 0:12:08HE PLAYS WOBBLE BOARD AND GRUNTS
0:12:13 > 0:12:16CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:12:16 > 0:12:19- Have you sabotaged it? - No, I haven't touched it!
0:12:19 > 0:12:23- The problem is in your performance. You should do the keyboard. - Yeah, do the keyboard.
0:12:25 > 0:12:29- Good luck. - Tamzin, if you could help me out with this, it'd be a great help.
0:12:29 > 0:12:34- If you could play that note there... - SHE PLAYS NOTE - Keep playing it.
0:12:34 > 0:12:36- And I'll play... - HE PLAYS CHORD
0:12:36 > 0:12:40So you just keep doing that and I'll do that.
0:12:40 > 0:12:42SHE SCREAMS
0:12:42 > 0:12:44- LAUGHTER - Oi!
0:12:44 > 0:12:47CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:12:49 > 0:12:52Very good.
0:12:53 > 0:12:55I really don't know why I bother.
0:12:55 > 0:12:58Sometimes I really don't. We're through!
0:12:58 > 0:13:03- Thank you!- Unlucky, Vic. But I think she's still reasonably keen.
0:13:03 > 0:13:06- LAUGHTER - That's the end of the first round,
0:13:06 > 0:13:10- so what are the scores... - BOTH: Angelos!
0:13:10 > 0:13:13DANCE MUSIC PLAYS
0:13:27 > 0:13:30CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:13:35 > 0:13:39- Angelos!- What?- Hold your horses.- Hm?
0:13:39 > 0:13:42- What's that bag on the end? - This one here, you say?
0:13:42 > 0:13:45- Yeah.- Oh, this is my bag for life. Oh, yes, yes.
0:13:45 > 0:13:48- Bag for life?- Yes. - I've got a bag for life.- Have you?
0:13:48 > 0:13:52- I married her! - LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE
0:13:52 > 0:13:57You've... That's quite a commitment, Angelos. Quite a commitment, bag for life.
0:13:57 > 0:14:01Yeah, well, I'm bang into the environment. It's better for the environment.
0:14:01 > 0:14:07- Oh, you're not still banging on about the environment, are you? - Mortimer, can I ask you a question?
0:14:07 > 0:14:09- Yeah.- Can I ask you a question? - Yeah.
0:14:09 > 0:14:13The world is on its arse. LAUGHTER
0:14:13 > 0:14:16- Well... - LAUGHTER
0:14:16 > 0:14:20- That's not a question, Angelos. It's a statement.- What? - It's just a statement.
0:14:20 > 0:14:23- Do you want me to rephrase the question?- Yes, please, Angelos.
0:14:25 > 0:14:28The world is on its arse? LAUGHTER
0:14:29 > 0:14:35- What's the scores, Angelos? - Er, Jack's got one, Ulrika's got one and a half!
0:14:35 > 0:14:37CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:14:40 > 0:14:43- The next round is the... Oh, whoa. - Check me out.
0:14:43 > 0:14:48- I am checking you out. What's that hardware on your eyebrows? - Wow, it's my new piercings.
0:14:48 > 0:14:52- Tell me you're not having anything else done. - I'm getting a G-clamp on my chin,
0:14:52 > 0:14:55an Allen key in my ear,
0:14:55 > 0:14:57for routine maintenance,
0:14:57 > 0:15:02- nuts and bolts here, everything, all sorts.- Oh, don't.- Hey, you like that, check out the back.
0:15:02 > 0:15:05- You what?- Check that out. Go on, have a look.- What is it?
0:15:05 > 0:15:11- You like it?- Yeah. Does it work? - Yeah. Go on, give it a go.
0:15:11 > 0:15:14TOILET FLUSHES
0:15:14 > 0:15:16LAUGHTER
0:15:16 > 0:15:19- WATER TRICKLES - Oh, Jesus.
0:15:19 > 0:15:21LAUGHTER
0:15:21 > 0:15:24I haven't had the downpipe put in yet.
0:15:24 > 0:15:28No, you haven't, have you? You might have said that before I flushed it.
0:15:28 > 0:15:34The next round is the Dove From Above round so I'd like to ask all our contestants
0:15:34 > 0:15:38to help me beckon down that beautiful, plump dove from above!
0:15:38 > 0:15:40- Down she comes! - THEY COO
0:15:40 > 0:15:45Her beady eye. Is that a vajazzle between her thigh?
0:15:45 > 0:15:48- LAUGHTER - Plump dove from above.
0:15:48 > 0:15:52- Micky!- Hello.- Micky, choose a category from the dove from above.
0:15:52 > 0:15:55- Erm, can I go for tight, please? - You're going for tight.
0:15:55 > 0:15:58It's a good choice. It's the club singer question.
0:15:58 > 0:16:02- Mr Reeves, who should be seated, oh, there...- Here I am. Hello. - There he is.
0:16:02 > 0:16:06..will sing a song in the club style. Can you guess what song he's singing?
0:16:06 > 0:16:09Can we have a beat, please, Angelos?
0:16:09 > 0:16:12HE SINGS UNINTELLIGIBLY
0:16:20 > 0:16:23CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:16:23 > 0:16:26Any ideas what that was? Come on!
0:16:26 > 0:16:30# Doesn't matter if it's wrong or right
0:16:30 > 0:16:33Ah! # Doesn't matter if you're black or white
0:16:33 > 0:16:36- Yeah, definitely Michael Jackson. - You reckon?
0:16:36 > 0:16:40- What song was it you were singing? - It was In The Summertime by Mungo Jerry.
0:16:40 > 0:16:44- LAUGHTER - Well, ladies the gentlemen, let's hear that song sung properly
0:16:44 > 0:16:49in the style of one of the members of the Last Of The Summer Wine team.
0:16:49 > 0:16:52LAUGHTER
0:16:53 > 0:16:56# In the summertime when your trousers are tight
0:16:56 > 0:16:59# And your knackers get crushed when you're riding your bike
0:16:59 > 0:17:03# In the summertime, you've got trou-trou-trousers on your mind
0:17:04 > 0:17:09# Take 'em off, set 'em free, pull your undies up nice and high
0:17:10 > 0:17:15# Take 'em off, set 'em free and pull your undies up nice and high
0:17:15 > 0:17:18CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:17:24 > 0:17:29Tamzin, would you like to pick a category for the dove from above?
0:17:29 > 0:17:32- Brothers 1, please. - Brothers 1, right.
0:17:32 > 0:17:37Tamzin, could you tell me, what is the name of Ed Milliband's brother?
0:17:37 > 0:17:41His name is David.
0:17:41 > 0:17:44- Is the correct answer. - LAUGHTER
0:17:44 > 0:17:46Or you could've had
0:17:46 > 0:17:49his other brother The Steve Miller Band!
0:17:49 > 0:17:53LAUGHTER
0:17:53 > 0:17:55LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE
0:17:55 > 0:17:59- HONKING - He's here all week! - LAUGHTER
0:17:59 > 0:18:03- I'm here all week!- He's here all week!- I'm here all week!
0:18:03 > 0:18:07- THEY LAUGH MANIACALLY - Don't forget, it's adults only.
0:18:07 > 0:18:10LAUGHTER / HONKING
0:18:12 > 0:18:15Charlie! Charlie Higson, I've got you a little present.
0:18:15 > 0:18:19- Oh!- Not often we do this, but Charlie Higson!
0:18:19 > 0:18:21Jesus! So, Charlie,
0:18:21 > 0:18:26just because you made the effort to come tonight, we've got a nice little present.
0:18:26 > 0:18:30- It's actually some delicious homemade sausages. - LAUGHTER
0:18:30 > 0:18:35"This is mainly dog dirts. And I don't want to appear ungrateful.
0:18:35 > 0:18:39"And they're nice to me. I hope he doesn't ask me to try one."
0:18:39 > 0:18:42- Would you like to try one, Charlie? - LAUGHTER
0:18:42 > 0:18:47"I suppose I have to. I hope he doesn't want me to eat more than one."
0:18:47 > 0:18:50- Go on, take a couple, Charlie. - LAUGHTER
0:18:50 > 0:18:53Oh, hold.... Oh, Charlie, I'm so sorry.
0:18:53 > 0:18:55Vic, is this something to do with you?
0:18:55 > 0:18:58- What?- Look at that! Is that something to do with you?
0:18:58 > 0:19:00- Yeah.- Well, explain yourself.
0:19:00 > 0:19:07Well, I saw the box in the room and I presumed it was your potty, so I've been using it all day.
0:19:07 > 0:19:12- I've been busy. - You've been very busy, haven't you? - Yeah, I've been very busy, actually.
0:19:12 > 0:19:16I'm really sorry about that, Charlie. Maybe you could just run them under the tap or something.
0:19:16 > 0:19:19They might be OK.
0:19:19 > 0:19:23- "I suppose I could take them home and fob them off on the wife." - LAUGHTER
0:19:23 > 0:19:27Charlie! Pick a category from the dove from above.
0:19:27 > 0:19:31The one I wanted has gone, so I'll go for cream.
0:19:31 > 0:19:36Cream! It's a good choice, Charlie. It's Angelos's variety showcase.
0:19:36 > 0:19:39Watch carefully, the question follows. If you're ready, Angelos?
0:19:39 > 0:19:42VIOLIN MUSIC
0:19:49 > 0:19:52DRUM ROLL
0:19:52 > 0:19:55FANFARE
0:19:56 > 0:19:59This is single cream. LAUGHTER
0:20:01 > 0:20:03This is a funnel.
0:20:04 > 0:20:07LAUGHTER
0:20:31 > 0:20:34DRUM ROLL
0:20:34 > 0:20:36FANFARE
0:20:39 > 0:20:42HE PLAYS TOM TOMS
0:20:44 > 0:20:4660s MUSIC
0:20:55 > 0:20:58LAUGHTER
0:21:06 > 0:21:10CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:21:11 > 0:21:13DRUM ROLL
0:21:17 > 0:21:19FANFARE
0:21:19 > 0:21:22CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:21:27 > 0:21:32- That's how it's done!- And that's how they make butter these days.
0:21:32 > 0:21:36Now, Charlie, your question comes directly from Angelos.
0:21:36 > 0:21:42Charlie! That was a demonstration there of how to turn cream into butter,
0:21:42 > 0:21:48but can you tell me, Charlie, what is the hottest part of a cow?
0:21:48 > 0:21:51LAUGHTER
0:21:51 > 0:21:56Er, shall we say the intestinal tract?
0:21:56 > 0:22:00I don't know, let's ask her. LAUGHTER
0:22:02 > 0:22:04APPLAUSE
0:22:06 > 0:22:08Ooh!
0:22:08 > 0:22:10BOTH: Ooh!
0:22:11 > 0:22:15- You don't mean that, Angelos. - No, I don't mean that at all.
0:22:15 > 0:22:18What is the hottest part of you, Ulrika?
0:22:18 > 0:22:21- Charlie, can you help? - CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:22:23 > 0:22:26That's how she gets them! She knocks them out.
0:22:27 > 0:22:30- It's all hot.- God, that was hot.
0:22:30 > 0:22:34- She's still got it, Angelos. - I know she has, and I want it!
0:22:34 > 0:22:36LAUGHTER
0:22:36 > 0:22:38Right, well, that's the end of the dove round,
0:22:38 > 0:22:41so what are the scores, Angelos?
0:22:41 > 0:22:44Mani, just a quick word with you, if you wouldn't mind.
0:22:44 > 0:22:49- Can I just ask you, looking at you, as you are...- Yeah?
0:22:49 > 0:22:51..do you need to borrow some money?
0:22:51 > 0:22:54- I do, mate, yeah. - LAUGHTER
0:22:54 > 0:22:58- All donations gratefully accepted, my friend.- Here's three quid. Get your hair cut.
0:22:58 > 0:23:02- Cheers. - LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE
0:23:04 > 0:23:09- What are the scores, Angelos? - Jack's got two, Ulrika remains with one and a half!
0:23:09 > 0:23:12APPLAUSE
0:23:14 > 0:23:19- Thank you. Thank you very much.- Vic? - That was our version of...- Vic?
0:23:19 > 0:23:21- What? Oh!- Oh, stop it!
0:23:21 > 0:23:24- No! Not that thing again! - Yes, it's Phillip the buzzard.
0:23:24 > 0:23:28- Parrot.- It's a buzzard, Vic. Why do you have to treat him that way?
0:23:28 > 0:23:32- I'm sorry. - You know all his problems are because of the way you treat him.
0:23:32 > 0:23:37- You know, his confidence is at its lowest ever. - Has he been to see a psychiatrist?
0:23:37 > 0:23:41- Yes, he has, actually. Do you want to know what they said?- If you want.
0:23:41 > 0:23:47- Well, they said that, deep down, Phillip wishes he was a larger, more powerful bird, you know?- Yep.
0:23:47 > 0:23:51- One of the big birds of prey, golden eagle.- Yeah. - I can help him out there.
0:23:51 > 0:23:53- You could help him?- Yeah. - Oh, that's really kind.
0:23:53 > 0:23:57SPRAY CAN RATTLES
0:23:58 > 0:24:00LAUGHTER
0:24:01 > 0:24:04- Golden eagle. - HE LAUGHS MANIACALLY
0:24:04 > 0:24:07LAUGHTER
0:24:10 > 0:24:13Thank you very much. What a terrible man.
0:24:13 > 0:24:17Let's move on. It's the final round. It's the quick-fire round. We're against the clock.
0:24:17 > 0:24:20When the time's up you'll hear this noise.
0:24:20 > 0:24:23Will you stop that racket? LAUGHTER
0:24:24 > 0:24:29Are you ready on the buzzers? True or false, Bear Grylls?
0:24:29 > 0:24:31LAUGHTER AND BUZZER
0:24:31 > 0:24:34- That's Jack.- True. - It is true. Of course he does.
0:24:34 > 0:24:38- Who's that? - BUZZER - Higson.- Simon Cowell.
0:24:38 > 0:24:41- Correct. - LAUGHTER
0:24:41 > 0:24:44David Van Day invented the DVD
0:24:44 > 0:24:47but what did Vera Duckworth invent?
0:24:48 > 0:24:51- BUZZER - That sounds like Mick.
0:24:51 > 0:24:54- Gonorrhoea?- Yes, VD, of course.
0:24:54 > 0:24:58- Who's that? - BUZZER - Higson?- Simon Cowell.- Correct.
0:24:58 > 0:25:01APPLAUSE AND LAUGHTER
0:25:01 > 0:25:03Cornettos, true or false,
0:25:03 > 0:25:07- Cornettos are actually unicorn shit? - LAUGHTER
0:25:07 > 0:25:12- BUZZER - It's Jack again.- It's false. - It is false.
0:25:13 > 0:25:15- Who's that? - BUZZER - Higson.
0:25:15 > 0:25:19- Simon Cowell?- Correct. - LAUGHTER
0:25:19 > 0:25:22Will you stop it with that racket?
0:25:22 > 0:25:27It's the end of the quiz, so what are the final scores, Angelos?
0:25:27 > 0:25:31Jack's got four and Ulrika's got two!
0:25:31 > 0:25:33- APPLAUSE - Jack! Unlucky, Ulrika.
0:25:36 > 0:25:40Well, Jack, as tonight's victorious captain, it falls to you
0:25:40 > 0:25:43to choose a member of your team to take tonight's final challenge.
0:25:43 > 0:25:49- Who's it going to be, Jack? - Er, Tamzin, I think.- BOTH: Tamzin!
0:25:49 > 0:25:54Tamzin, will you come and join me for tonight's final challenge!
0:25:54 > 0:25:57CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:25:58 > 0:26:03- Come on, my darling.- He just called me Tazmin.- He did, yeah, I know.
0:26:03 > 0:26:07- Tamzin.- Tamzin, you've been selected to take tonight's final challenge.
0:26:07 > 0:26:13And as always with our challenges, there's a marvellous prize on offer. Here's Mr Reeves with details.
0:26:13 > 0:26:17Tonight, Tamzin, should you be successful, you win this fantastic prize.
0:26:17 > 0:26:21It's a half an hour drive around St Albans
0:26:21 > 0:26:24with Puff Daddy in his new Citroen Berlingo!
0:26:24 > 0:26:28- CHEERING AND LAUGHTER - In his new Citroen Berlingo.
0:26:28 > 0:26:33Now, let's just check. Puff, it is a new Citroen Berlingo, isn't it?
0:26:33 > 0:26:39Well, it's got, like, 7,000 miles on it, but we good, you know, it's still a new model.
0:26:39 > 0:26:42There you go. Thank you, Puff. If you'd like to watch proceedings.
0:26:42 > 0:26:46- And he's ready with his keys.- Yeah. - And he can take you round St Albans.
0:26:46 > 0:26:50The challenge is a little bit frightening but relatively simple.
0:26:50 > 0:26:55You'll need to put your hand through this hole, and using the sense of touch alone,
0:26:55 > 0:27:01identify which animal it is you're touching. Now...
0:27:01 > 0:27:05- LAUGHTER - Now, Tamzin,
0:27:05 > 0:27:09be careful, the big fellow, be a little bit gentle with him.
0:27:09 > 0:27:13But he's got a muzzle on so you're absolutely safe, so if you'd...
0:27:13 > 0:27:16- Are you ready, Mr Reeves? - Yes, I'm ready.
0:27:16 > 0:27:20He's ready. If you're ready, can you put your hand through and identify
0:27:20 > 0:27:22what animal is behind the hole.
0:27:22 > 0:27:25Off you go, Tam.
0:27:27 > 0:27:30LAUGHTER
0:27:32 > 0:27:35LAUGHTER
0:27:46 > 0:27:50- Weird!- Weird, isn't it? It is an unusual beast, yes.
0:27:51 > 0:27:54- LAUGHTER - What's that?
0:27:56 > 0:27:59- What is it?- Is it some form of dog?
0:27:59 > 0:28:02What is it, Mr Reeves? Thank you Taz... Tamzin.
0:28:02 > 0:28:06- It's a duglet! - LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE
0:28:08 > 0:28:14Has been used in the brewing industry, but is now used in the preparation of washing up liquid.
0:28:14 > 0:28:18You've earned that date with Puff Daddy.
0:28:18 > 0:28:21Ladies and Gentleman, that is Shooting Stars!
0:28:21 > 0:28:24- Goodbye!- Come on! - CHEERING AND APPLAUSE - Come and join us.
0:28:26 > 0:28:31# Goodbye from Shooting Stars # Goodbye whoever you are
0:28:32 > 0:28:35Thank you, Puff.
0:28:37 > 0:28:41Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd
0:28:41 > 0:28:45E-mail subtitling@bbc.co.uk
0:28:45 > 0:28:45.