0:00:03 > 0:00:07- Haud the lift!- > - Shite!- Come on, you bastard - shut!
0:00:12 > 0:00:15That was lucky, eh?
0:00:15 > 0:00:20- BOTH: Aye, lucky. - You'll be wondering why I've no coat.- No.
0:00:20 > 0:00:27I'm not goin' oot o' the building, just doon to No 2, to Kathy Reid. She's gonnae gie me her old cooker.
0:00:27 > 0:00:31- Is that a fact? - Where are yous goin'?
0:00:31 > 0:00:36- See that?- Yes, I did, actually. Got a wee keek o' your modus operandi there, Isa.
0:00:36 > 0:00:42You telling us where you're going - and we're no' interested - in order to find out where WE'RE going!
0:00:42 > 0:00:46- We're off to the Clansman. - Nae juicy gossip there.
0:00:46 > 0:00:52- Nothing newsworthy.- Nothing worth passing on. "Guess what! Jack and Victor have gone to the Clansman!"
0:00:52 > 0:00:56- "Drinking beer!"- Cheeky bastards!
0:00:59 > 0:01:02Never seen that there yesterday.
0:01:02 > 0:01:04Och, it will be thae wee neds.
0:01:04 > 0:01:08"CYT"?! What does that mean, anyway?
0:01:08 > 0:01:11Dunno. Craiglang Youth Theatre?
0:01:19 > 0:01:23YOUTH GIGGLES What are you laughing at?
0:01:23 > 0:01:26Know how all the questions?
0:01:26 > 0:01:31- "Know how all the questions?" Yes. - See where it says "sex"?- Uh-huh.
0:01:31 > 0:01:37- I've put, "Yes, please."! - Aye, well done, son. That'll score you a lot of points(!)
0:01:39 > 0:01:43- Mr Ingram?- Oh! Right you are, son.
0:01:44 > 0:01:50- Please, sit down.- Oh, thanks very much, Mr, um...- Robin -
0:01:50 > 0:01:53- there's no Misters here. - Thanks, Robin. I'm Winston.
0:01:53 > 0:01:59- Winston? Good name - noble. - Thanks very much. Yours is a smashing name too - Robin.
0:01:59 > 0:02:03- Like a wee bird.- Well, let's see...
0:02:04 > 0:02:07You live in Craiglang. That's our catchment. That's great.
0:02:07 > 0:02:11- You worked at Yarrow's. - All my days, Robin.- Excellent!
0:02:11 > 0:02:15Ships, building, welding, grafters...
0:02:15 > 0:02:19Winston, that's great. That's what Food Fare is all about -
0:02:19 > 0:02:25committed people with the same goal, forging ahead, working together for...
0:02:25 > 0:02:29- For wages.- No, the customer. - The customer!
0:02:29 > 0:02:35When I started here, it was a small company but I knew that it was going places. That's why I joined.
0:02:35 > 0:02:39- Why do YOU want to work for Food Fare?- Uh, well...
0:02:39 > 0:02:43I have been a customer of Food Fare for a number of years,
0:02:43 > 0:02:48and I have watched with pleasure it growing from hee-haw to huge,
0:02:48 > 0:02:52with branches all over the shop, including...er...
0:02:52 > 0:02:55the one next to the motorway there.
0:02:55 > 0:02:59I've also admired the courteousness of the staff
0:02:59 > 0:03:03and the convenient layout of the shop floor.
0:03:03 > 0:03:10I feel also, Robin, that you have a team here that I would be proud to be a part of...
0:03:10 > 0:03:12It... Er...
0:03:12 > 0:03:15- I'm skint!- Sorry?
0:03:15 > 0:03:20Listen, son, naebody wants to be working at my age. But I'm doon a hole. I need the money.
0:03:20 > 0:03:24I cannae survive on the pension. I'm too fond of the pub and the bookies.
0:03:24 > 0:03:30So what do you say you and I forge ahead and work together and see if we cannae get me a couple of shifts?
0:03:30 > 0:03:33..Can you start the day?
0:03:36 > 0:03:39Lovely that, isn't it(?)
0:03:39 > 0:03:44- I'm gonnae say something. - Leave it, Jack.- No!
0:03:44 > 0:03:45Here, you!
0:03:45 > 0:03:49- What is it you think you're doing? - Painting.
0:03:49 > 0:03:53Painting. You must work for the council. I don't see a boiler suit.
0:03:53 > 0:03:57So you're part of this "Craiglang Young Team"?
0:03:57 > 0:03:59Aye, I'm the leader!
0:04:01 > 0:04:05So is all this because you've got nothing to do?
0:04:05 > 0:04:11When we were growing up, there was nothing to do either, but we didnae resort to vandalising things!
0:04:11 > 0:04:16Aye, we would get a ball, kick it about all night, right up till lighting-up time!
0:04:16 > 0:04:20Aye, or go to the park and fish for baggy minnies!
0:04:20 > 0:04:27- We'd get sticks, make them into boats, race them. We FOUND things to do.- You've got to find things
0:04:27 > 0:04:32- to amuse yersel!- I mean, that's got to be better than this. This isnae getting you naewhere!
0:04:32 > 0:04:35- Shut it!- Now, you listen to me...
0:04:38 > 0:04:43- Right, you! - Right, beat it, you old bastard!
0:04:43 > 0:04:47Look who it is! If it isnae... Jesus Christ, are thae tits?
0:04:47 > 0:04:49Yes, Boabby. They are.
0:04:49 > 0:04:51Tits!
0:04:51 > 0:04:54No, I'm no' so sure
0:04:54 > 0:04:56that I'm keen on your tits, Victor.
0:04:56 > 0:04:59Bit droopy.
0:04:59 > 0:05:02- I love the round ones!- Two pints!
0:05:02 > 0:05:04So what the hell happened?
0:05:04 > 0:05:07We dug up a couple of neds for spray-painting.
0:05:07 > 0:05:12- Ye didnae do something about it? - We're pensioners, for Christ's sake!
0:05:12 > 0:05:14- I reckon yous got off light.- How?
0:05:14 > 0:05:20Old John McKenna got two bags of messages took off him - and a boot in the stones for his trouble.
0:05:20 > 0:05:25There's a new Young Team coming up. A lot of faces down at the off-licence that I don't recognise.
0:05:25 > 0:05:30Well, if things get any worse, I'm bailing out, selling up. ..£3.60.
0:05:30 > 0:05:35There's a fiver. Keep the change - give us the title deeds!
0:05:35 > 0:05:39- This widnae be going on if Big Innes was still here.- Jesus!
0:05:39 > 0:05:42Innes, eh? There's a flashback!
0:05:42 > 0:05:46- Aye.- Aye, he never took ANY shite, did he?
0:05:46 > 0:05:50- No, you widnae mess wi' Innes. - He must be away over 15 years now.
0:05:50 > 0:05:55- What happened to him?- Deid?- No, he was doon last year for a funeral.
0:05:55 > 0:05:59- Stays up in Elgin. Has a croft there.- A croft?- Aye.
0:05:59 > 0:06:03- Can I use your phone? - Aye, over there, mate.
0:06:06 > 0:06:09A croft, you say?
0:06:09 > 0:06:12Would a croft have such a thing as a phone?
0:06:12 > 0:06:15PHONE RINGS
0:06:18 > 0:06:20Hello?
0:06:20 > 0:06:24Jack Jarvis? Jack Jarvis from the Craiglang!
0:06:24 > 0:06:28Well, I'm blessed! How the devil are you?
0:06:28 > 0:06:31Uh-huh.
0:06:31 > 0:06:33And are you still in Craiglang?
0:06:33 > 0:06:37Aw! Och, that disnae sound very good.
0:06:37 > 0:06:41Innes? Oh, he's fine. Fighting fit!
0:06:44 > 0:06:47Oh, I see. I...I don't...
0:06:47 > 0:06:50Well...I'd have to ask him.
0:06:50 > 0:06:53Right.
0:06:53 > 0:06:56Right. Well, I'll ask him.
0:06:57 > 0:07:01Now, listen, if he says aye and comes doon,
0:07:01 > 0:07:05you've to promise me one thing. Don't gie him...
0:07:05 > 0:07:08Midori. Yes, I know. I remember, aye.
0:07:08 > 0:07:11Aye, that's right - Midori.
0:07:11 > 0:07:15He'll ask for it, but he's no' to get it, Jack!
0:07:15 > 0:07:20- No, don't worry about that. - Haud on, I'll get him for you.
0:07:21 > 0:07:24Innes! It's the phone for you.
0:07:28 > 0:07:32Download a patch fae the Microsoft site. What's actually happening?
0:07:32 > 0:07:36It just keeps rebooting, an' my icons are a' ower the place.
0:07:36 > 0:07:41Aye, sounds like Dogtooth. You've got a virus. Ye'll get a wee patch.
0:07:41 > 0:07:44All gibberish to you, auld yin?
0:07:44 > 0:07:49- No!- All right, then. What were we talkin' aboot?- Wee patch...
0:07:49 > 0:07:51Dogtooth...
0:07:51 > 0:07:56Em...is it a wee dug... called Patch...that's got a cold?
0:07:59 > 0:08:01Aye! It's a wee dug ca'd Patch!
0:08:01 > 0:08:04C'mere, Patch!
0:08:04 > 0:08:09Watch and no' blow yer brains oot wi' that pricing gun, auld yin!
0:08:18 > 0:08:21DING-DONG! Aha! Ooh!
0:08:21 > 0:08:26- What the hell are ye daein'?- What d'you think, gents?- About what?
0:08:29 > 0:08:31DING-DONG!
0:08:31 > 0:08:33DING-DONG!
0:08:33 > 0:08:38It means if I'm in the back of the shop, I know if somebody's come in.
0:08:38 > 0:08:44- Did you no' used to have one that went "Brr!"?- Aye, but "Brr!" is shite. "Ding-dong!" is mair modern.
0:08:44 > 0:08:49- What is it you call them again? - It's the, um...
0:08:49 > 0:08:52Haud on, I know this. It's the, er... Victor?
0:08:52 > 0:08:55It's the...the...
0:08:55 > 0:08:57- the door buzzer...noise.- Bell.
0:08:57 > 0:09:02Aye. The door noise buzzer bell, somebody's-coming-in doofer.
0:09:02 > 0:09:05MEENA:
0:09:05 > 0:09:09Aye, Meena doesnae know either.
0:09:11 > 0:09:15I had some bother wi' neds comin' in and liftin' stuff bloody oot.
0:09:15 > 0:09:19- This'll be my eyes an' ears.- Good. You'll probably no' need it, though.
0:09:19 > 0:09:21- Why?- Because help is on its way.
0:09:21 > 0:09:24You'll no' remember him,
0:09:24 > 0:09:30- but a big pal o' ours is comin' doon to sort these wee bastards out. - Oh, aye?- Big fella, name of Innes.
0:09:30 > 0:09:36Him and his wife used to live on the scheme. There was nae carry-on when he was aboot! Ye didnae cross Innes!
0:09:36 > 0:09:41- I'll get him from the railway station later on.- That'll be great!
0:09:41 > 0:09:46Like a sheriff, comin' to round up all the wee pricks! A hard nut?
0:09:46 > 0:09:49- Aye. So have you any Midori? - A poofy hard nut?!
0:09:49 > 0:09:55No, you see, the thing is, Innes loves Midori, but he cannae drink it, cos he's allergic to it.
0:09:55 > 0:10:00- So we cannae have any about.- This is a great day. For years and years,
0:10:00 > 0:10:04I've only ever had the one bottle. It sits there, laughing at me.
0:10:04 > 0:10:08- And now I finally get to shift it. - That's great.
0:10:08 > 0:10:14- I'm gonnae stick it under my bed. - Gentlemen, I give you...the stoory Midori!
0:10:16 > 0:10:19That's nice o' ye - "I give you!"
0:10:19 > 0:10:21- £12.- £10.
0:10:21 > 0:10:24- 13.- 12.
0:10:27 > 0:10:31Meena, dust down that bottle of Advocaat - I think we're on a roll!
0:10:31 > 0:10:34Steady!
0:10:38 > 0:10:41Let me take that for you, madam.
0:10:41 > 0:10:43Hey!
0:10:43 > 0:10:46Oh! Sorry about that, darlin'.
0:10:48 > 0:10:51Right!
0:10:51 > 0:10:54Oh, come on!
0:10:54 > 0:10:56Problem wi' yer trolleys, auld yin?
0:10:56 > 0:11:02- Nope!- How's an old duffer like you workin' here?- What do you mean?
0:11:02 > 0:11:07It's a young man's game - stackin' shelves, pricin', trolley recovery.
0:11:07 > 0:11:11- Nonsense. I'm perfectly capable of puttin' in a day's shift.- That right?
0:11:11 > 0:11:16- Aye, that's right.- You've only got six trolleys, and you're sweatin',
0:11:16 > 0:11:22- strugglin' to control them... cos you're old!- Cos I'm new!- Naw!
0:11:22 > 0:11:26See from day one, I could do 40. You'll never do 40, Grandda!
0:11:26 > 0:11:33- What is it wi' you and that patter? - I'm 24. I'm gonnae be daein' this job six months, a year, maybe.
0:11:33 > 0:11:38I'll no' be daein' this job at your age. That's boggin!
0:11:38 > 0:11:43See when I'm your age? I'll be lyin' on a beach wi' a drink and a cigar!
0:11:43 > 0:11:49- Oh, you bloody think so? Well... - Gotta go. By the way, you've broke the first rule in trolley recovery.
0:11:49 > 0:11:53- What would that be?- You've got a DRT heading for an RPB.
0:11:55 > 0:11:59Dangerous Rogue Trolley, Really Pricey Brief.
0:11:59 > 0:12:02Oh, Jesus!
0:12:02 > 0:12:05Oh, Jesus!
0:12:05 > 0:12:07Allergic?! To this wee drap?
0:12:07 > 0:12:12Right, well, give him it! Then see what you've let yourself in for!
0:12:12 > 0:12:14Right!
0:12:14 > 0:12:17So how big is this guy?
0:12:17 > 0:12:21I'll tell you how big he is. He drinks lager two pints at a time.
0:12:21 > 0:12:26In fact, you'd better make that four. He'll be thirsty.
0:12:26 > 0:12:30- Four pints? Pish! Who drinks four pints?- What I'm about to show you
0:12:30 > 0:12:35is a picture of me, Jack and Innes in Saltcoats, 1964.
0:12:38 > 0:12:41Is that him?!
0:12:41 > 0:12:44You'd better get them poured.
0:12:49 > 0:12:52Mind your head on that.
0:12:55 > 0:12:59- Innes! Hello! - All right, Victor? Eric!
0:12:59 > 0:13:01- How are you keepin'?- Aye, fine!
0:13:01 > 0:13:05- You'll be ready for a beer, eh? - Any Midori?
0:13:08 > 0:13:12- Naw.- Come on get a seat, take the weight aff.
0:13:21 > 0:13:23It's smashin' you're here, Innes.
0:13:23 > 0:13:27- Nae bother, Victor.- It was good o' you to come doon, but.
0:13:27 > 0:13:32I tell ye what - I'll get settled in at Jack's and look round tomorrow -
0:13:32 > 0:13:35sort those wee bastards oot.
0:13:35 > 0:13:40- I fixed up the spare room for ye', Innes.- That's good o' ye, Jack.
0:13:40 > 0:13:44Oh! Where are you goin'? For a pish.
0:13:44 > 0:13:47No' in here. Ye're no' a customer. Get it up ye!
0:13:48 > 0:13:51Excuse me, lads.
0:13:59 > 0:14:02UNZIPS
0:14:02 > 0:14:07I think the barman said the toilet's only for customers.
0:14:07 > 0:14:10Is 'at right? Barman's a walloper!
0:14:18 > 0:14:24- How's it going, Jack?- All right, except he's eatin' me out o' house and hame.- What are ye talkin' aboot?
0:14:24 > 0:14:30- He only landed last night.- Aye. Half a loaf o' sandwiches last night, the other half this morning, toasted.
0:14:30 > 0:14:35He's done in eight eggs! Eats them like bloody Smarties! See this.
0:14:36 > 0:14:39Is that a soup pot?!
0:14:39 > 0:14:44Aye! I offered him an ordinary bowl. He just laughed at me.
0:14:44 > 0:14:48There's two pints of milk in that, and a full box o' Cornflakes!
0:14:48 > 0:14:53- Thae wee bastards don't know what's coming!- Any mair toast there, Jack?
0:14:53 > 0:14:56Yes, Innes, coming.
0:14:57 > 0:15:02Want me to cut that up for ye, auld yin? Save you wrestlin' wi' it?
0:15:02 > 0:15:06Mash up his egg, Susie - make it nice an' soft for the auld yin!
0:15:08 > 0:15:13- Winston, is it?- Aye, that's right. - Ssh! Andy Collier, Warehouse.
0:15:13 > 0:15:18- Pleased to meet you, Andy.- See you've been singled out for attention.
0:15:18 > 0:15:23- How do ye mean?- Gettin' it from Kevin.- Oh, is that his name?- Aye.
0:15:23 > 0:15:27- Doesnae like the auld yins. - He doesnae seem to hassle you.
0:15:27 > 0:15:34He accidentally switched off a fridge once, ruined a pile o' milk, butters, yoghurts, creme fraiche.
0:15:34 > 0:15:41I took the fall for him - said it was me. He's left me alane ever since. Try and get in wi' him -
0:15:41 > 0:15:44- it'll make life a whole lot easier. - But he's an arsehole!
0:15:44 > 0:15:49There's only one other road left open to ye - he's the daddy...
0:15:49 > 0:15:55the tallest stalk in here. You have to cut him doon, send out the right message on the jungle drums.
0:15:55 > 0:15:57What are you on about?
0:15:57 > 0:16:03I'm sayin' ye have to take him doon. Take him doon tae Chinatoon!
0:16:03 > 0:16:08Listen, you - this is Food Fare in Craiglang. Ye're no' in Sing Sing!
0:16:08 > 0:16:11Winston!
0:16:11 > 0:16:14You'll need these.
0:16:22 > 0:16:25Hello, ye wee fanny!
0:16:25 > 0:16:27Whit are you on?
0:16:27 > 0:16:32- Remember us?- Aye. Ah dae. Are ye back for another coat, like?
0:16:33 > 0:16:35I'm gonnae dae you in!
0:17:56 > 0:17:58Hello, there, Stevie.
0:18:00 > 0:18:02- Oh!- Davina - is this Davina?
0:18:02 > 0:18:07- Oh, look at you!- Look at you! You're absolutely lovely.
0:18:07 > 0:18:10Well done, hen, eh?
0:18:10 > 0:18:12Cheery-bye!
0:18:12 > 0:18:17- I'm getting too old for that! - Nonsense! You're young yet, Navid!
0:18:19 > 0:18:21DING-DONG!
0:18:21 > 0:18:26- How's it going, Navid? - Very well, gents, very well,
0:18:26 > 0:18:32largely thanks to the big fella cleaning the town out! Everyone this morning has been wearing a big smile.
0:18:32 > 0:18:35- I look out the windae - nae neds. - Aye, I know.- Good, isn't it?
0:18:35 > 0:18:39- You needin' bread?- Aye, two loaves. I'll take a dozen eggs an' all.
0:18:39 > 0:18:46- Have you any big jars o' jam? - Nae bother.- Oh, Wagon Wheels! He enjoys a wee Wagon Wheel.
0:18:46 > 0:18:49There we go.
0:18:49 > 0:18:53- Jesus!- Aye, I know! It's like keepin' a bloody bear!
0:18:53 > 0:18:57- The big man was in earlier. - Innes? What was he wantin'?
0:18:57 > 0:19:01- He was after that Midori stuff. - But you havenae got any.
0:19:01 > 0:19:03- That's what I telt him.- Good.
0:19:03 > 0:19:07- I said you took the last bottle and were hiding it under your bed.- What?!
0:19:07 > 0:19:11- Come on, Jack. He's pullin' your pisser.- Hee-hee!
0:19:11 > 0:19:14Damn thing!
0:19:18 > 0:19:21- I'll get that for ye, hen.- Oh!
0:19:21 > 0:19:24Thanks very much!
0:19:27 > 0:19:32- Ye'll be wantin' it in here. - Aye, in there. That's lovely.
0:19:32 > 0:19:38- You're like a big body builder! Can I dae ye a sandwich?- Aye!
0:19:38 > 0:19:41- Is this gettin' flung oot?- Aye.
0:19:41 > 0:19:45I'll need to sort that oot. I've to call the council to uplift it.
0:19:45 > 0:19:48Even then, it'll be four days.
0:19:54 > 0:19:58Are ye wantin' a cup o' tea wi' that?
0:19:58 > 0:20:03- Or maybe somethin' a wee bit stronger?- Have ye any Midori?
0:20:10 > 0:20:14- It's nae use. It's this stupid gun! - Aw, it's the gun?
0:20:14 > 0:20:17The gun's auld. Tell ye what -
0:20:17 > 0:20:20take ma gun. I'll kick yer arse using your own gun, eh?
0:20:20 > 0:20:22Right.
0:20:35 > 0:20:37Ha!
0:20:37 > 0:20:40How d'you like that, eh? That's you beat.
0:20:40 > 0:20:42Beat, and beat good.
0:20:42 > 0:20:44Done, done, done.
0:20:46 > 0:20:48Aye, you WOULD be done
0:20:48 > 0:20:51if you'd paid £9.99 for a wee tin of sweetcorn.
0:20:51 > 0:20:54Done, good an' proper.
0:20:54 > 0:20:56These'll need DONE again.
0:21:03 > 0:21:07I see Kevin's still ragging you. It's comin' tae a heid.
0:21:07 > 0:21:10You see what he's doing, don't ye?
0:21:10 > 0:21:13- He's making you his bitch. - Ach, away you tae f...!
0:21:22 > 0:21:27- Where are you wantin' this? - Oh, oot o' here. Take it to yours, oot the road of him.
0:21:27 > 0:21:31Right you are. Oh, that smells rare. What is that?
0:21:31 > 0:21:35Big juicy steak. It's the least we could do after all he's done.
0:21:35 > 0:21:40Jesus! Look at the size of that! That's no' a steak, Jack.
0:21:40 > 0:21:43That's a coo with the horns snapped aff!
0:21:43 > 0:21:48- How much did three of them set you back?- Oh, I didnae buy three, naw.
0:21:48 > 0:21:50These are ours.
0:21:50 > 0:21:55Right. I'll go and plank this before he appears.
0:21:56 > 0:21:58Oh, Victor!
0:21:58 > 0:21:59Victor!
0:21:59 > 0:22:04Don't barge out. Look through the peephole, check the coast's clear.
0:22:04 > 0:22:06Oh, aye.
0:22:07 > 0:22:08Shite!
0:22:08 > 0:22:11- He's coming oot of Isa's.- Isa's?
0:22:11 > 0:22:14Hold on. He's waiting on the lift.
0:22:16 > 0:22:18Oh, aye.
0:22:18 > 0:22:22- Oh, what's she slabberin' on about? - BELL RINGS
0:22:22 > 0:22:26Oh, there's the lift there. He's away into the lift.
0:22:26 > 0:22:28Now she's away back into her flat.
0:22:28 > 0:22:30Right, that's the coast clear.
0:22:36 > 0:22:40What d'you think Big Innes was doing in at Isa's?
0:22:40 > 0:22:43- ISA SCREAMS Come here!- What is it, Isa?
0:22:43 > 0:22:46- It's in there, it's in there! - Calm doon, Isa.
0:22:46 > 0:22:50- Look!- What am I supposed to be loo...?
0:22:53 > 0:22:55Is that Big Innes that done that?
0:22:55 > 0:22:58Ooh, the dirty big bastard.
0:22:58 > 0:23:03- He must've had tae stand up tae get himself aff o' that. - What am I gonnae dae?
0:23:03 > 0:23:06Batter it with a loo brush? Break it into bits?
0:23:06 > 0:23:11- Will Harpic or Domestos BURN it to death?- Domestos!
0:23:11 > 0:23:15- What was he doing over here anyway? - He was coming to me for his dinner.
0:23:15 > 0:23:18I fed him. He lifted in a cooker for me.
0:23:18 > 0:23:21- Where's he away tae noo?- Food Fare.
0:23:21 > 0:23:25He's away to get himsel' a bottle of Damuri or Madiri...
0:23:25 > 0:23:28TOGETHER: Midori.
0:23:28 > 0:23:34Aye, that's it. He says he couldnae get it anywhere, and I says he'd probably get it at the Food Fare.
0:23:53 > 0:23:55D'you think we beat him here?
0:23:56 > 0:23:59Aye, by a ba' hair. Look.
0:24:00 > 0:24:02Jesus! Get in, get in!
0:24:06 > 0:24:09Wait, wait! Hands aff.
0:24:09 > 0:24:11Aff!
0:24:11 > 0:24:15You've only got two things. Carry them up to the coonter.
0:24:17 > 0:24:21- This is SOFT drinks, you clown! - How was I supposed to know?
0:24:21 > 0:24:23- It said "drinks"!- Jack. Victor.
0:24:23 > 0:24:26- Winston, where's the Midori? - You don't drink Midori.
0:24:26 > 0:24:30- No, we don't, but Big Innes... - Ssh! MIDORI!
0:24:30 > 0:24:33- Aisle 12, aisle 12.- 12. C'mon.
0:24:38 > 0:24:39Ohh!
0:24:44 > 0:24:47Ah, Midori. Get it! Be careful.
0:24:49 > 0:24:51He's comin'! ..Sorry, sir.
0:24:51 > 0:24:55You'll have to use the other aisle. This floor's wet.
0:24:58 > 0:25:00Carry on!
0:25:00 > 0:25:03- Who's gonnae pay for this? - I don't know.
0:25:03 > 0:25:06- Have you got money?- Naw. - Quickly now.
0:25:08 > 0:25:10Oh, Jesus!
0:25:13 > 0:25:15Come on!
0:25:19 > 0:25:20Hey!
0:25:42 > 0:25:45- He's away.- Ohh!
0:25:45 > 0:25:49- Winston, what is it you're doin' workin' in here?- Jesus!
0:25:49 > 0:25:51Noo there's THREE auld bastards!
0:25:53 > 0:25:55I don't work here.
0:25:58 > 0:26:01Break it!
0:26:04 > 0:26:08- Any sign of Jack and Victor, Boabby? - Naw, hen. How?
0:26:08 > 0:26:12Ach, it disnae matter. I'll see them mysel'.
0:26:12 > 0:26:18Oh, Innes, I was lookin' for Jack and Victor there. Victor left this sittin' on his landin'...
0:26:34 > 0:26:35Nice?
0:26:35 > 0:26:38Not a bit of bother for days.
0:26:38 > 0:26:41Aye, all down to the good man Innes.
0:26:49 > 0:26:51SNORING
0:27:00 > 0:27:01Midori?
0:27:02 > 0:27:03Midori.
0:27:31 > 0:27:35Subtitles by Subtitling Unit BBC Broadcast 2004
0:27:35 > 0:27:39E-mail us at subtitling@bbc.co.uk
0:27:44 > 0:27:47Off to Elgin for a wee holiday?
0:27:47 > 0:27:50Naw, I'm going hame. I've been doon visitin' some pals.
0:27:50 > 0:27:55- Sounds lovely.- Actually...I might've outstayed my welcome a wee bit.
0:27:55 > 0:27:58Refreshments. You wantin' anythin', big man?
0:27:58 > 0:28:01- What've you got?- Vodka, gin...
0:28:01 > 0:28:03whisky, Midori...