Episode 2

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0:00:02 > 0:00:08This programme contains some strong language

0:00:20 > 0:00:22CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

0:00:23 > 0:00:27Hello, I'm Nick Grimshaw, and this is Sweat The Small Stuff!

0:00:27 > 0:00:29CHEERING AND APPLAUSE CONTINUES

0:00:37 > 0:00:39Yes, welcome to Sweat The Small Stuff,

0:00:39 > 0:00:43the show that makes a big deal about the very little things in life,

0:00:43 > 0:00:46like, I don't care much about the nuclear arms situation

0:00:46 > 0:00:48and that really doesn't bother me.

0:00:48 > 0:00:49What bothers me is that I know nothing

0:00:49 > 0:00:52about Michelle Obama's arm situation.

0:00:52 > 0:00:55Have you seen her triceps? She's incredible.

0:00:55 > 0:00:59Apparently, also, politicians met this week in Washington

0:00:59 > 0:01:03to renew vows for peace between Israel and Palestine.

0:01:03 > 0:01:05- Boring. - LAUGHTER

0:01:05 > 0:01:09Is it not more significant that Mariah Carey and her husband

0:01:09 > 0:01:11met this week to renew their vows in Disneyland?

0:01:11 > 0:01:13That's where you have a meeting.

0:01:13 > 0:01:15LAUGHTER

0:01:15 > 0:01:16I care about these things

0:01:16 > 0:01:19because the little things really are worth sweating about,

0:01:19 > 0:01:22but I can't do it alone, so let's meet our team captains.

0:01:22 > 0:01:25Yes, they're my favourite duo - after Ashleigh and Pudsey,

0:01:25 > 0:01:30Ant and Dec, Hale and Pace, Torvill and Dean, or Marks & Spencers.

0:01:30 > 0:01:35From Kiss FM, it's Rickie Haywood-Williams and Melvin Odoom!

0:01:35 > 0:01:37CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

0:01:40 > 0:01:43- Hi!- Renny!

0:01:43 > 0:01:45- Hi, Rickie!- How are you? - I'm very good, how are you?

0:01:45 > 0:01:48- I'm good, you're looking very suave today.- I look well smart.

0:01:48 > 0:01:51- I like the little pockets... - Do you like this?

0:01:51 > 0:01:54- A lady taught me how to do it before, should I demonstrate?- Do it.

0:01:54 > 0:01:57Because I did it wrong. She said, "You put it on the table

0:01:57 > 0:02:00"and then you pick it up like this and you just throw it in."

0:02:00 > 0:02:02LAUGHTER

0:02:02 > 0:02:05A big week last week. You won the first ever episode

0:02:05 > 0:02:08on the first ever series of Sweat The Small Stuff.

0:02:08 > 0:02:10- I'll do it again this week. - You think you'll win again?- 100%.

0:02:10 > 0:02:13I think you might win. You look like Pharrell tonight.

0:02:13 > 0:02:17- Ah, shut up.- You do! - Really?- Me like Pharrell!

0:02:17 > 0:02:19LAUGHTER

0:02:19 > 0:02:23- Not such a big week for you though. - No.- Never a big week for you.

0:02:23 > 0:02:25LAUGHTER

0:02:25 > 0:02:30- My dad's here though.- Where's your dad?- Just over there.- Hi, Dad!

0:02:30 > 0:02:31CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

0:02:31 > 0:02:33WHISTLING

0:02:33 > 0:02:38Who was whistling at my dad, boy? That is raunchy, you over there.

0:02:38 > 0:02:40Dad, get that number.

0:02:40 > 0:02:42LAUGHTER

0:02:42 > 0:02:43Let's meet the teams.

0:02:43 > 0:02:46On Rickie's team this evening is a TV presenter

0:02:46 > 0:02:48who is sweating it because she's currently searching

0:02:48 > 0:02:51for a new co-presenter for the Xtra Factor.

0:02:53 > 0:02:56- If Ollie doesn't do it, do you want to do it?- No, I'm OK, thanks.

0:02:56 > 0:02:57It's Caroline Flack!

0:02:57 > 0:02:58CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

0:03:04 > 0:03:07Also joining Caroline and Rickie we have an award-winning comedian

0:03:07 > 0:03:10who admits to being a bit of a binge drinker

0:03:10 > 0:03:12who can never remember a thing the next day.

0:03:12 > 0:03:15He's sweating it because he has absolutely no idea where he is

0:03:15 > 0:03:18or how he ended up here, next to Caroline Flack AGAIN.

0:03:18 > 0:03:20It's Sean Walsh!

0:03:20 > 0:03:23CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

0:03:23 > 0:03:24It's a nice team, isn't it?

0:03:24 > 0:03:27- It's a good team.- I'm pleased with our team.- Are you?- Mmm.

0:03:27 > 0:03:29- It's a very nice set you've got. - It's good, isn't it?

0:03:29 > 0:03:33They look a bit like, we thought, like sideways vaginas.

0:03:33 > 0:03:34LAUGHTER

0:03:34 > 0:03:38You have definitely never seen a vagina.

0:03:38 > 0:03:39I've never seen one.

0:03:39 > 0:03:43Over on Melvin's team, we have a soon-to-be mother

0:03:43 > 0:03:45who's sweating it because she doesn't want her child

0:03:45 > 0:03:48to follow in Marvin's footsteps and become unemployed.

0:03:48 > 0:03:53She's made it to show two, it's Rochelle from the Saturdays.

0:03:53 > 0:03:55- CHEERING AND APPLAUSE - Yes!

0:03:57 > 0:04:01And we have, joining those two, a grime superstar,

0:04:01 > 0:04:04who's sweating it in case I reveal his real name.

0:04:04 > 0:04:06It's Jermaine Sinclair! Sorry...

0:04:06 > 0:04:09It's Wretch 32, everybody!

0:04:09 > 0:04:12APPLAUSE

0:04:14 > 0:04:16- Rochelle, you're still with us. - I have two weeks to go.

0:04:16 > 0:04:20We're going to have to start carving a bit out.

0:04:20 > 0:04:22It's wiped clean, this floor.

0:04:22 > 0:04:25- If your waters break it's fine.- Right.

0:04:25 > 0:04:27- Have you got a mop?- No, I don't.

0:04:27 > 0:04:32I do have some things here just in case owt happens on the show today.

0:04:32 > 0:04:33I've got gas and air.

0:04:33 > 0:04:37I've also got, what else have I got? Hot towels.

0:04:37 > 0:04:41- Right?- Not warm, but we'll warm them up later.- OK, perfect.

0:04:41 > 0:04:44We've got a plunger, not sure if we need that.

0:04:44 > 0:04:47What's that for? Oh, my goodness!

0:04:47 > 0:04:49This is a big 'un.

0:04:49 > 0:04:51Don't they use them, though?

0:04:51 > 0:04:53Isn't that not why I've got a funny-shaped head?

0:04:53 > 0:04:57- I've only got two weeks left, you're scaring me.- Well, that's for you.

0:04:57 > 0:05:01Sean Walsh, what is making you sweat all of this week?

0:05:01 > 0:05:04It says here, "Returning missed calls".

0:05:04 > 0:05:07Returning missed calls, this has always annoyed me. What happens,

0:05:07 > 0:05:10someone calls you, your mate calls you, you miss the call,

0:05:10 > 0:05:12- you call him, he misses your call. - I hate that.

0:05:12 > 0:05:14This keeps on happening, all day.

0:05:14 > 0:05:16Then he calls you, you JUST miss the call, JUST,

0:05:16 > 0:05:19just miss the call, call straight back,

0:05:19 > 0:05:22he doesn't answer. Where the fuck have you gone?

0:05:22 > 0:05:24LAUGHTER What's going on?

0:05:24 > 0:05:26APPLAUSE DROWNS OUT SPEECH

0:05:28 > 0:05:30There's not been enough time

0:05:30 > 0:05:32for him to put the phone back in his pocket.

0:05:32 > 0:05:34You call back straight away.

0:05:34 > 0:05:36All that could've happened here is you've not answered

0:05:36 > 0:05:38and he's gone, "Fuck him!"

0:05:38 > 0:05:39LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE

0:05:41 > 0:05:44OK, it's time for round one. Are you ready, teams?

0:05:44 > 0:05:45ALL: Yes!

0:05:45 > 0:05:47Yeah! As you know, Sweat The Small Stuff

0:05:47 > 0:05:49is all about the little things in life.

0:05:49 > 0:05:52When it comes to the news, we don't care about the big stories,

0:05:52 > 0:05:55I am much more interested in stuff like this.

0:05:55 > 0:05:58Here is a teeny, tiny news story that we found

0:05:58 > 0:06:01that says the average Briton has slept with eight people.

0:06:01 > 0:06:05Melvin, now how many do you think is TOO many?

0:06:05 > 0:06:07The maximum I'd go for is 40.

0:06:09 > 0:06:13- Melvin!- You would have a lady that had had sex with 40 men?

0:06:13 > 0:06:15Let's say if you really loved her...

0:06:15 > 0:06:18- Yes, but if she's had 41, it's a no-go area.- Yes.

0:06:18 > 0:06:21- A strict cut-off point. - 40 is me maximum.

0:06:21 > 0:06:25- So different for men and women. - Isn't it? Thank you!- Girl power!

0:06:25 > 0:06:27WOMEN WHOOP AND CHEER

0:06:29 > 0:06:31LAUGHTER

0:06:31 > 0:06:35Teams, do you think that you can tell just by looking at someone

0:06:35 > 0:06:38if they have slept with more than eight people?

0:06:38 > 0:06:43- Yes.- Yes?- No!- We have decided to put this to the test.

0:06:43 > 0:06:46We rounded up some people on the street and asked them,

0:06:46 > 0:06:49"Have you slept with more than eight people?"

0:06:49 > 0:06:52The way this is going to work, we will see the person swear on...

0:06:52 > 0:06:55- this. - MUSIC AND LAUGHTER

0:06:57 > 0:06:58The quiff of me!

0:06:58 > 0:07:01We made them swear on this to tell the absolute truth

0:07:01 > 0:07:05and all you have to do is decide if they are indeed a little bit slutty.

0:07:05 > 0:07:07We start with your team, Rickie -

0:07:07 > 0:07:11let's have the first potential perv, please.

0:07:11 > 0:07:12Hi, my name is Chris

0:07:12 > 0:07:15and I swear on the quiff of Grimmy to tell the absolute truth.

0:07:15 > 0:07:18Have you slept with more than eight people?

0:07:18 > 0:07:21Whoa!

0:07:21 > 0:07:24- What do we think?- I don't think he has.- No? Why don't you think that?

0:07:24 > 0:07:27- Because I think he looks a little bit shy.- Do you think?

0:07:27 > 0:07:31- He's got purple hair, Caroline! - But that's to cover up his shyness.

0:07:31 > 0:07:34- I think he's a little bit nervous. - Sean, what do you think?

0:07:34 > 0:07:36Um, I think...

0:07:36 > 0:07:39There will be a girl and she'll have the same hair as him

0:07:39 > 0:07:41and definitely, yes.

0:07:41 > 0:07:44- So we're going yes?- You're going for yes. Let's find out!

0:07:45 > 0:07:49No, I'm a bit of a loser in that sense. I've been with...

0:07:49 > 0:07:51Hmmm. Five!

0:07:51 > 0:07:54So, you know... Not too bad.

0:07:54 > 0:07:56ALL: Awww!

0:07:56 > 0:07:58APPLAUSE

0:07:58 > 0:08:00One for Melvin's team, please.

0:08:00 > 0:08:02Hi, I'm Marilyn and I swear on the quiff of Grimmy that I'm going

0:08:02 > 0:08:04to tell the absolute truth.

0:08:04 > 0:08:06Have you slept with more than eight people?

0:08:07 > 0:08:10- Hm, has she?- Oh, I don't know. - Or hasn't she?

0:08:10 > 0:08:15- What do you think in the audience? - Yes!- No!

0:08:15 > 0:08:17I don't know.

0:08:17 > 0:08:20- She's too angelic-looking. She looks too homely.- Yes, I don't think so.

0:08:20 > 0:08:23Exactly - is that her decoy?

0:08:23 > 0:08:25Maybe she's a sex disguise woman!

0:08:25 > 0:08:27- LAUGHTER - We're going to say no.

0:08:27 > 0:08:30You're saying no, she has not slept with more than eight people -

0:08:30 > 0:08:33- let's find out, has she? - I have not slept with eight people.

0:08:33 > 0:08:36I've slept with two people. Three people! I forgot a person!

0:08:38 > 0:08:39APPLAUSE

0:08:39 > 0:08:44- Five people! Six people! Seven! - How many has she forgotten?

0:08:44 > 0:08:46Someone's sitting at home crying!

0:08:47 > 0:08:49Back to Rickie's team.

0:08:49 > 0:08:51For you - is this person slutty or not?

0:08:51 > 0:08:52Hi, my name is Kevin.

0:08:52 > 0:08:55I swear on the quiff of...Grimmy

0:08:55 > 0:08:57I'll tell the absolute truth.

0:08:57 > 0:09:00Have you slept with more than eight people?

0:09:00 > 0:09:01100% yes.

0:09:01 > 0:09:03I think he looks like he's been married

0:09:03 > 0:09:05since he was really young.

0:09:05 > 0:09:07He's probably been with the same woman all his life.

0:09:07 > 0:09:11- Only slept with one. - Flack is saying one.

0:09:11 > 0:09:16- He looks like absolute filth!- Look at his face!- So you're saying yes?

0:09:16 > 0:09:20- Absolutely filthy, yes!- OK! Let's find out if he's filthy!

0:09:20 > 0:09:23- Yes.- How many?

0:09:23 > 0:09:24Couldn't tell ya!

0:09:24 > 0:09:27APPLAUSE

0:09:27 > 0:09:32What a legend! Back to you, Melvin's team! Next one for you.

0:09:32 > 0:09:33OK.

0:09:34 > 0:09:36Hi, my name is Felipo and on the quiff of Grimmy,

0:09:36 > 0:09:38I swear to tell the truth.

0:09:38 > 0:09:40Have you slept with more than eight people?

0:09:40 > 0:09:46- ROCHELLE: Yes! MELVIN: Felipo! Felipo!- Audience are saying yes!

0:09:46 > 0:09:50Like, before he even spoke. "I've done him. I've had him.

0:09:50 > 0:09:54- "I'm doing him now." - The guys sounds sexy.

0:09:54 > 0:09:58He did a little recall, as well. He was like... "Yeah!"

0:09:58 > 0:10:02- Yeah, definitely. Who HASN'T he slept with is the question.- OK.

0:10:02 > 0:10:04Let's find out, they're saying yes.

0:10:06 > 0:10:07At the same time?

0:10:07 > 0:10:08WHOOPING AND LAUGHING

0:10:08 > 0:10:11Separately, yes. At the same time, no.

0:10:11 > 0:10:13But it could be something to add on the list.

0:10:13 > 0:10:16It only registers...

0:10:16 > 0:10:18I threw something his way.

0:10:19 > 0:10:23- What a don.- Thank you for playing On The Quiff Of Grimmy!

0:10:23 > 0:10:25APPLAUSE

0:10:28 > 0:10:30It says here, Wretch 32,

0:10:30 > 0:10:33that you have been sweating about a wonderful cereal called Sugar Puffs.

0:10:33 > 0:10:38- Nah - my issue is the milk has always gone off in my house.- OK...

0:10:38 > 0:10:42Somebody said yeah - you know about this? Or you live with me?

0:10:42 > 0:10:43LAUGHTER

0:10:43 > 0:10:44That's your milkman.

0:10:44 > 0:10:46Yes, so I run down the stairs,

0:10:46 > 0:10:48I'm excited about a bowl of Sugar Puffs, pour the milk in...

0:10:48 > 0:10:51You're half asleep, so you don't check, you're going for the spoon,

0:10:51 > 0:10:55- and you don't have milk, you have yoghurt. So, yeah...- Eurgh!

0:10:55 > 0:10:58Don't you eat weird stuff? Don't you eat weird things, like...beige?

0:10:58 > 0:11:03- I have plain bagels, just plain. - No butter?- No butter.- Plain bagels.

0:11:03 > 0:11:08Because I heard the diet of Wretch 32 is chips, bagels, Sugar Puffs.

0:11:08 > 0:11:11- And gone-off milk.- And gone-off milk.

0:11:11 > 0:11:14I can relate to you. This is how lazy I am.

0:11:14 > 0:11:17When I was at home, cooking fish fingers, chips and beans...

0:11:17 > 0:11:20- Oh, I love that meal!- Ladies!

0:11:20 > 0:11:22LAUGHTER

0:11:22 > 0:11:28- I do!- It's quality, right?- I love that!- Come round, we'll eat! So...

0:11:28 > 0:11:33I had a pack of fish fingers in my left hand,

0:11:33 > 0:11:34and a bag of chips in my right.

0:11:34 > 0:11:39The temperature and the timing on the fish fingers matched

0:11:39 > 0:11:41the temperature and the timing on the chips,

0:11:41 > 0:11:43and I was on my own, and I went, "Get in!

0:11:43 > 0:11:46LAUGHTER

0:11:46 > 0:11:48APPLAUSE

0:11:48 > 0:11:51OK. It's time for Round Two.

0:11:51 > 0:11:54I'm going to give both teams a clue as to one of my own personal

0:11:54 > 0:11:58sweats and this one is one that I'm genuinely really

0:11:58 > 0:12:01worried about sharing with you all.

0:12:01 > 0:12:05Because it's something I probably shouldn't admit on national TV.

0:12:05 > 0:12:07Is it that you prefer listening to Kiss breakfast?

0:12:07 > 0:12:09LAUGHTER

0:12:09 > 0:12:12That's absolutely correct!

0:12:12 > 0:12:14- It's a good show! - It's a good show. Tut.

0:12:16 > 0:12:19Is it that you really wanted to be friends with Niall from One Direction,

0:12:19 > 0:12:22and that's why you started being friends with Harry?

0:12:22 > 0:12:23That's what's going on.

0:12:23 > 0:12:25And now you can't get rid of Harry!

0:12:25 > 0:12:28He's a mere stepping stone to the Irish great one!

0:12:28 > 0:12:30LAUGHTER

0:12:30 > 0:12:33- OK, shall I give you a clue?- Yes.

0:12:33 > 0:12:37OK, teams - what is it about THIS that I've been sweating about?

0:12:37 > 0:12:42# Daddy, I've fallen for a monster. #

0:12:42 > 0:12:44OK.

0:12:44 > 0:12:47APPLAUSE

0:12:49 > 0:12:51That's Stooshe.

0:12:51 > 0:12:54Off of the pop charts.

0:12:54 > 0:12:57But what is it about that that has got me sweating?

0:12:57 > 0:12:59I don't know, but I like them!

0:12:59 > 0:13:04- They're good, innit?!- Is it three sexy ladies?- Yes, I HATE WOMEN!

0:13:05 > 0:13:09- Girl bands?- Not girl bands. - Harmonies?- Not harmonies.

0:13:09 > 0:13:12- Do you want another clue? - People singing.- Another clue.

0:13:12 > 0:13:13OK.

0:13:13 > 0:13:15# Why did you let it slip

0:13:15 > 0:13:17# Slip

0:13:17 > 0:13:19# Give me that TLC

0:13:19 > 0:13:21# Back to me

0:13:21 > 0:13:23# You put your mind back on it

0:13:23 > 0:13:25# Do it like I want it

0:13:25 > 0:13:27# That's how it used to be

0:13:27 > 0:13:29# Why did you let it slip? #

0:13:29 > 0:13:31MELVIN: Whoo!

0:13:31 > 0:13:34APPLAUSE AND CHEERING

0:13:34 > 0:13:38- Any other ideas? - People singing behind you?- Close!

0:13:38 > 0:13:42- You don't like people singing live? - Boom, Rochelle!

0:13:42 > 0:13:45I do not like people singing near me,

0:13:45 > 0:13:49and I hate the fact that I'm a radio DJ who absolutely hates live music!

0:13:50 > 0:13:53A point for Melvin's team!

0:13:53 > 0:13:55CHEERING

0:13:57 > 0:13:59Does anyone else hate live music?

0:13:59 > 0:14:03- I love Wretch 32's face - "No, it is my living!"- I'm in shock!

0:14:03 > 0:14:07- No, I don't like it.- I can never see at gigs. I'm too small.

0:14:07 > 0:14:09Is it quite hard when you go to a gig and you can't see

0:14:09 > 0:14:12the band to pick which one you want as your next boyfriend?

0:14:12 > 0:14:14ALL: Ohhhh!

0:14:14 > 0:14:16- Oi!- That's nice!- Oi!

0:14:16 > 0:14:17Oi, leave her alone!

0:14:19 > 0:14:22I hate gigs, they suck. People touching me...

0:14:22 > 0:14:25I have to be quiet for like, an hour and a half...

0:14:25 > 0:14:26You don't like going to gigs?

0:14:26 > 0:14:28No, because it's too long and I think it's

0:14:28 > 0:14:31because I can't sit down and be quiet for two hours.

0:14:31 > 0:14:33Also, people frown when I use my phone.

0:14:33 > 0:14:34LAUGHTER

0:14:34 > 0:14:37I've seen you in action at a festival...

0:14:37 > 0:14:41See, a festival is all right, because there's other distractions.

0:14:41 > 0:14:43However, my worst thing at a festival,

0:14:43 > 0:14:46almost as bad as live music is the festival fashion.

0:14:46 > 0:14:47It drives me crazy.

0:14:47 > 0:14:50You know, when people dress different because they're

0:14:50 > 0:14:54going to a festival, so they wear normal clothes all the time and then

0:14:54 > 0:14:58they go to a festival and then they dress like they're on acid in 1969.

0:14:58 > 0:15:02The worst is when people save the bracelets, the wristbands.

0:15:02 > 0:15:06"Oh, I went to Glastonbury, I went to Reading, I went to Latitude..."

0:15:06 > 0:15:09I went to... "I couldn't give a shit", mate!

0:15:09 > 0:15:12I've been to loads of places, I don't carry around my airport

0:15:12 > 0:15:17tickets, there you go - I went to Paris, Amsterdam, Barcelona...

0:15:17 > 0:15:20Oh, there's a token from Alton Towers! Look!

0:15:20 > 0:15:23APPLAUSE

0:15:26 > 0:15:30I think the downside is though, a festival is fun and everything,

0:15:30 > 0:15:33I like 'em, but the downside is the best place to watch bands is

0:15:33 > 0:15:36also the worst place, the most dangerous.

0:15:36 > 0:15:39There's a mosh pit, people throwing bottles of piss,

0:15:39 > 0:15:41and you can get piss on you.

0:15:41 > 0:15:45Have you ever had anything thrown on at you, Rochelle?

0:15:45 > 0:15:47Um, probably, but I just choose to ignore it.

0:15:47 > 0:15:50I'm still going to perform, whether you like it or not!

0:15:50 > 0:15:53I'm enjoying myself and having a whale of a time. Throw the piss!

0:15:53 > 0:15:55LAUGHTER

0:15:55 > 0:15:57Don't do that as an opening monologue. "You know what?

0:15:57 > 0:16:00"You want to throw piss at me..."

0:16:00 > 0:16:03You know what, though - I don't always think it's pee.

0:16:03 > 0:16:04It's probably beer.

0:16:04 > 0:16:06How do you know?

0:16:06 > 0:16:09You've got to do a little reach-around next time, like...

0:16:09 > 0:16:10Oh!

0:16:12 > 0:16:14Yes, stranger's piss in my mouth.

0:16:14 > 0:16:16Which leads us on to our next game,

0:16:16 > 0:16:19the wonderfully titled Urine The Line of Fire.

0:16:19 > 0:16:21CHEERING

0:16:25 > 0:16:29Here we are then at my favourite festival, Wee In The Park.

0:16:29 > 0:16:33It's a tiny Festival, perfect for Melvin!

0:16:33 > 0:16:35The gag is, he's short!

0:16:35 > 0:16:37Teams, the way this is going to work, you're going

0:16:37 > 0:16:41to have some bottles of fresh urine to throw at a musical target.

0:16:41 > 0:16:45Two musical stars will pop up over there on the stage

0:16:45 > 0:16:47and you have to decide which target you are aiming for.

0:16:47 > 0:16:51The one that most deserves to be covered in piss.

0:16:51 > 0:16:53Hit the right one and you win a bonus point for your team.

0:16:53 > 0:16:57Hit the wrong one and you're escorted out of here by festival security.

0:16:57 > 0:16:59Melvin, who's going to play from your team?

0:16:59 > 0:17:01It's got to be Rochelle, come on!

0:17:01 > 0:17:04CHEERING

0:17:10 > 0:17:13- Hi, Rochelle.- I'm really bad at throwing, Grimmy.- Are you?

0:17:13 > 0:17:16- Yeah.- OK, well let's find out how good you are or how terrible

0:17:16 > 0:17:18you are as we get ready to play Urine The Line Of Fire.

0:17:18 > 0:17:21Who's on stage this evening?

0:17:21 > 0:17:23Bloomin' Marvin and Cheryl Cole!

0:17:25 > 0:17:27Ooh, who are you going to aim for? She's in a rival girl band...

0:17:27 > 0:17:30Oh, they're gone now! He's your husband.

0:17:30 > 0:17:32- He did THIS!- He did!

0:17:32 > 0:17:34Let's get him!

0:17:36 > 0:17:40- Are you going for Marvin? - Yes, because he'll understand.

0:17:40 > 0:17:43I like the conversation when you get home tonight, like...

0:17:43 > 0:17:45- What did you do at work today?!- I...

0:17:45 > 0:17:49threw wee all over your face on telly.

0:17:49 > 0:17:51Anyway, let's go to bed.

0:17:51 > 0:17:54Let's throw some piss at Marvin, Rochelle!

0:17:57 > 0:17:58Yeah!

0:17:58 > 0:18:00CHEERING

0:18:04 > 0:18:06OK, Rickie - who's going to play from your team?

0:18:06 > 0:18:09- The lovely, gorgeous Miss Caroline Flack, everybody!- Yeah!

0:18:09 > 0:18:12APPLAUSE

0:18:15 > 0:18:18Let's find out who you'll be throwing piss at this evening.

0:18:18 > 0:18:21- Yeah!- Olly Murs!

0:18:21 > 0:18:22James Arthur!

0:18:22 > 0:18:24Who shall I throw it at?

0:18:24 > 0:18:25SHOUTING

0:18:25 > 0:18:27The public are saying James.

0:18:27 > 0:18:31Caroline Flack, get ready to throw piss at James Arthur!

0:18:31 > 0:18:34APPLAUSE

0:18:34 > 0:18:38Let's play. You're aiming for the face.

0:18:38 > 0:18:40- Oh!- Aggressive, Flacky.

0:18:40 > 0:18:42Here we go. Oh, no, it's Styles!

0:18:42 > 0:18:44LAUGHTER

0:18:45 > 0:18:49Don't hit Harry! Oh!

0:18:49 > 0:18:52No way! Hit him! No, don't hit Harry!

0:18:52 > 0:18:54No way, Flacky.

0:18:54 > 0:18:56Go for James Arthur! Yeah!

0:18:56 > 0:18:59CHEERING

0:19:00 > 0:19:02A point for your team.

0:19:02 > 0:19:04Caroline Flack, everybody.

0:19:04 > 0:19:07I've got wee on my hands!

0:19:07 > 0:19:11Well done, teams and thank you for playing Urine The Line of Fire.

0:19:11 > 0:19:12APPLAUSE

0:19:16 > 0:19:21OK, time now for Rickie and Melvin - The Challenges.

0:19:21 > 0:19:22This is where each week

0:19:22 > 0:19:24I challenge our team captains to

0:19:24 > 0:19:26take their own little sweats out into the big, bad world,

0:19:26 > 0:19:28out of their brains, into the world.

0:19:28 > 0:19:31This week's sweat is all about when you go into a shop

0:19:31 > 0:19:35and ask someone for help, then you realise...they don't work there.

0:19:35 > 0:19:37And you're an arsehole.

0:19:37 > 0:19:38Rickie, you won this last week.

0:19:38 > 0:19:41We had the weird gym thing. It was very, very funny - you won.

0:19:41 > 0:19:43Have you got it in the bag this week?

0:19:43 > 0:19:47- No idea.- Melvin?- Yes.- You've won? - I've won this one.

0:19:47 > 0:19:51Let's find out - this is Rickie and Melvin - The Challenges.

0:19:54 > 0:19:58Hi, guys - we're in a toilet again. This time in a glamorous shop.

0:19:58 > 0:20:02This week's challenge is all about shopping and that mistake you often

0:20:02 > 0:20:05make when you ask somebody in a shop for help, but they don't work there!

0:20:05 > 0:20:08What I want you to do is go into that shop and get as many random

0:20:08 > 0:20:12shoppers as possible to help you, even though they don't work there.

0:20:12 > 0:20:17Whoever gets the most help wins a massive one point for their team.

0:20:17 > 0:20:19- OK? Are you ready?- Let's do this.

0:20:19 > 0:20:23Let's do this. Not yet. I've not finished.

0:20:32 > 0:20:33It's a numbers game today.

0:20:33 > 0:20:36I'm looking forward to this one, it's going to be fun.

0:20:39 > 0:20:42I'm going to win, easy. Come on!

0:20:42 > 0:20:44Hello. I've got my receipt.

0:20:44 > 0:20:48Do you do this in a kid's size? It's a bit too big for me.

0:20:49 > 0:20:50I do have my receipt, so...

0:20:51 > 0:20:53Oh, you don't? You don't work here?

0:20:53 > 0:20:55Oh, do YOU do this...?

0:20:55 > 0:20:57OK.

0:20:58 > 0:21:01Hi. Can I just give you my CV? I'd love to work here.

0:21:01 > 0:21:05- Like, I love working in shops and stuff.- I don't work here.

0:21:05 > 0:21:07- You don't work here? - Where are you getting that from?

0:21:07 > 0:21:09I bought the shirt for my girlfriend

0:21:09 > 0:21:11and she's just said it looks disgusting.

0:21:11 > 0:21:13Do you do refunds, or...?

0:21:13 > 0:21:17- I'm not sure, we can ask someone. - Like your manager, or something?

0:21:17 > 0:21:20- But I don't work here.- Oh, you don't work here? Oh, you used to, but...?

0:21:20 > 0:21:22No, never.

0:21:22 > 0:21:25- Hello, how are you? I know you guys said...- I don't work here.

0:21:25 > 0:21:28I don't know you. Not met you before.

0:21:28 > 0:21:29Sorry. OK.

0:21:31 > 0:21:35I don't know how you're getting on, Melvin, but this is hard!

0:21:36 > 0:21:37Ooh, another customer.

0:21:37 > 0:21:41I'm sorry I'm late for my personal shop.

0:21:41 > 0:21:45I want to look like Simon Cowell, just high trousers,

0:21:45 > 0:21:48- a black T-shirt... - How can I help you?

0:21:48 > 0:21:51- Because they told me to come here for my personal shop.- Yes, but...

0:21:51 > 0:21:57- In the men's...- You've got the wrong person.- Um... Can I have a hug, then?

0:21:57 > 0:21:58Shake my hand, yeah!

0:21:58 > 0:22:01- High-five, then?- Thank you, mate.

0:22:01 > 0:22:04That was a backwards one! You're too cool, man.

0:22:05 > 0:22:07- Do you know how this works? - It's a toilet brush.

0:22:09 > 0:22:11Excuse me, could you just pick that?

0:22:13 > 0:22:15Thank you so much.

0:22:17 > 0:22:18- Are you serious?- Yeah.

0:22:18 > 0:22:20Yeah, you just clean the toilet.

0:22:20 > 0:22:21But how?

0:22:21 > 0:22:23Use your hands, mate.

0:22:23 > 0:22:25Oh, OK. All right.

0:22:27 > 0:22:30APPLAUSE

0:22:36 > 0:22:41Well done, Rickie and Melvin. A point each for your teams.

0:22:41 > 0:22:43APPLAUSE AND CHEERING

0:22:44 > 0:22:47- I have some of your sweats here, Caroline Flack.- Do you?

0:22:47 > 0:22:49It says here that one of your sweats is small feet.

0:22:49 > 0:22:51I've got really small feet.

0:22:51 > 0:22:52Small sweaty feet?

0:22:52 > 0:22:56No, I've got size two feet.

0:22:57 > 0:22:59You're a freak!

0:23:00 > 0:23:03I have the same size feet as my friend's seven-year-old son!

0:23:03 > 0:23:06Oh, that's cool! Borrow his wheelies!

0:23:06 > 0:23:07It's really hard to get shoes.

0:23:07 > 0:23:11In JD Sports, there's three sections, adults, juniors...

0:23:11 > 0:23:12And trolls!

0:23:12 > 0:23:14LAUGHTER

0:23:15 > 0:23:18Time now for the Sweatbox,

0:23:18 > 0:23:21where you get to actually help members of this very audience,

0:23:21 > 0:23:24who will tell you what small thing they have been sweating about.

0:23:24 > 0:23:25You teams will offer them advice.

0:23:25 > 0:23:28Whoever offers the best advice will get a point for their team.

0:23:28 > 0:23:31- Are you both ready? - VARIOUS: Yes.

0:23:31 > 0:23:34- Right, who's first in the Sweatbox? - Hi, I'm Sarah.

0:23:34 > 0:23:36- Hi.- Hello.- Hi, Sarah.

0:23:36 > 0:23:37What's your sweat?

0:23:37 > 0:23:41I keep sleep-cheating on my boyfriend with a celebrity.

0:23:41 > 0:23:43- Oh, my God. Amazing. Who? - Grimmy.

0:23:43 > 0:23:45- Oh, my God!- What?

0:23:45 > 0:23:46It's...

0:23:46 > 0:23:48- Am I...- Yeah.

0:23:48 > 0:23:50- Am I...- Yeah, you are.

0:23:52 > 0:23:55- What, so you have sex with Grimmy? - We kind of go for it.

0:23:55 > 0:23:57Oh, my God! Amazing.

0:23:59 > 0:24:00Is it just you two?

0:24:00 > 0:24:02There's a couple of other people that appear.

0:24:02 > 0:24:05- Who?- Whoa.- Harry appears.

0:24:05 > 0:24:08- Oh, you and Harry together? - No, we're just friends.

0:24:08 > 0:24:09It's while Grimmy does his hair.

0:24:09 > 0:24:12He makes me hang out with Harry while he does his hair.

0:24:14 > 0:24:17I don't think this is a dream. I think this is real life.

0:24:17 > 0:24:21- Is your boyfriend here?- Yes, he is. - Get him in the box with you!

0:24:21 > 0:24:23Yeah, get your boyfriend in.

0:24:23 > 0:24:26- Come on.- He's very reluctant.

0:24:26 > 0:24:29APPLAUSE

0:24:29 > 0:24:32How does it feel to have such a deceitful girlfriend?

0:24:34 > 0:24:35Do we have any advice for her?

0:24:35 > 0:24:37I've got some advice for the boyfriend, actually.

0:24:37 > 0:24:39Cos you could use this to your advantage.

0:24:39 > 0:24:41If she ever catches you cheating,

0:24:41 > 0:24:43you could just say, "Sorry, I was sleep-shagging!"

0:24:45 > 0:24:48I'd say really take Grimmy home with you tonight, fuck him,

0:24:48 > 0:24:50and then you won't dream about him any more!

0:24:50 > 0:24:53APPLAUSE

0:24:57 > 0:24:59No, no, it's a nightmare!

0:24:59 > 0:25:02Whose advice are you going to go for?

0:25:02 > 0:25:03Team Rickie or Team Melvin?

0:25:03 > 0:25:05I think I'm going to go Melvin.

0:25:05 > 0:25:08CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

0:25:08 > 0:25:10You win a point for your team.

0:25:12 > 0:25:14Are you going to go now?

0:25:14 > 0:25:17Does that have to happen now? But I'm so tired.

0:25:17 > 0:25:21OK, who's next in the Sweatbox?

0:25:21 > 0:25:23- It's Stooshe!- Stooshe!

0:25:23 > 0:25:25CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

0:25:28 > 0:25:32- Hi, Stooshe.- Hello. - Whatever is your problem, pray tell?

0:25:32 > 0:25:35I often get mistaken for another pop star.

0:25:35 > 0:25:38- OK.- OK.- Can you think about who it is?

0:25:38 > 0:25:41- Who's the other pop star? - Justin Bieber?

0:25:41 > 0:25:42What are you trying to say?

0:25:42 > 0:25:47- I don't mind.- No, it's another female pop star.

0:25:47 > 0:25:50- Is it Jessie J?- No.

0:25:50 > 0:25:53- Emeli Sande?- Yes!

0:25:53 > 0:25:55You're mistaken for Emeli Sande!

0:25:55 > 0:25:58I bet everyone thinks, "God, Emeli Sande's gangsta in real life."

0:25:58 > 0:26:00"She's a badman!"

0:26:00 > 0:26:02LAUGHTER

0:26:02 > 0:26:05Do you ever pretend you are Emeli Sande?

0:26:05 > 0:26:08Yeah, I use her name! I tell everyone, "Yeah, I'm Emeli."

0:26:08 > 0:26:10"I won an award!"

0:26:10 > 0:26:12My friend got deported out of Thailand once

0:26:12 > 0:26:14for pretending to be Su Pollard.

0:26:14 > 0:26:15LAUGHTER

0:26:15 > 0:26:20Rickie's team, what would you do if you looked like Emeli Sande?

0:26:20 > 0:26:21What should she do?

0:26:21 > 0:26:23It depends if it annoys you or not or whether you like it.

0:26:23 > 0:26:26If it annoys you, change your hair.

0:26:26 > 0:26:30- If it doesn't annoy you... - Keep your hair!- Keep your hair.

0:26:30 > 0:26:32Melvin's team, any advice?

0:26:32 > 0:26:34We said do something crazy

0:26:34 > 0:26:37- and then run away and pretend to be Emeli Sande!- Good idea.

0:26:37 > 0:26:40Then the police will go to Emeli Sande's house,

0:26:40 > 0:26:42lock her up and then you can be Stooshe!

0:26:42 > 0:26:45THEY CHEER

0:26:45 > 0:26:47Come over here. That's a good one.

0:26:49 > 0:26:51Whose advice are you going to go for?

0:26:51 > 0:26:53Team Rickie or Team Melvin?

0:26:53 > 0:26:55- Melvin!- I don't want to change my hair, so I'll go for you.

0:26:55 > 0:26:58Team Melvin! Point for your team.

0:27:00 > 0:27:02You could do the maddest stuff ever.

0:27:02 > 0:27:04You could take a poo on the stage right now and be like,

0:27:04 > 0:27:06"It was Emeli Sande."

0:27:06 > 0:27:10"Emeli Sande had a poo live on BBC3! She's lost it!"

0:27:11 > 0:27:16That was the final round! Thank you, Sweatboxers!

0:27:16 > 0:27:17Thank you, Stooshe!

0:27:17 > 0:27:21APPLAUSE AND CHEERING

0:27:21 > 0:27:25So that is it. I can reveal that tonight's winners are...

0:27:27 > 0:27:28Melvin's team!

0:27:28 > 0:27:30APPLAUSE AND CHEERING

0:27:39 > 0:27:41A big thank you to Rickie, Caroline Flack,

0:27:41 > 0:27:46Seann Walsh, Melvin, Rochelle and Wretch 32!

0:27:46 > 0:27:47This has been Sweat The Small Stuff.

0:27:47 > 0:27:49I've been Nick Grimshaw. Good night.

0:27:49 > 0:27:53APPLAUSE AND CHEERING

0:28:12 > 0:28:15Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd