0:00:02 > 0:00:03Ross Lee is no ordinary man.
0:00:03 > 0:00:07He's a practitioner of pranking and the public are his prey,
0:00:07 > 0:00:11a master of mischief, his mind a cyclone of stupidity.
0:00:11 > 0:00:15This is what happens when he spins out of control
0:00:15 > 0:00:18and crashes into the real world.
0:00:35 > 0:00:39- Coming up:- Arghhhh!
0:00:39 > 0:00:41It's, OK, mate. I'm gay.
0:00:41 > 0:00:44Look, I've had enough now of you and your horrible dog.
0:00:44 > 0:00:46Now, please leave me alone.
0:00:46 > 0:00:47You're starting to really piss me off.
0:00:49 > 0:00:52Fuck off and die.
0:00:56 > 0:01:02Introducing an egomaniac and a large, soon to be angry, bald man.
0:01:16 > 0:01:20Um, excuse me. This is a little bit,
0:01:20 > 0:01:25er, embarrassing, but you're sat in my favourite seat.
0:01:25 > 0:01:32This is my personal favourite table that you're sat in.
0:01:32 > 0:01:34Um, would you mind awfully
0:01:34 > 0:01:36if I just asked you to sit at the table over there?
0:01:36 > 0:01:38I'm sitting here.
0:01:38 > 0:01:42Er, I can see that you're sat there, and that's problem.
0:01:42 > 0:01:45- Er, if you wouldn't mind... - There isn't a problem.
0:01:45 > 0:01:50There isn't a problem, so if you walk away, there won't be a problem.
0:01:53 > 0:01:56- You do know who I am?- No.
0:01:56 > 0:01:57Who are you?
0:01:57 > 0:02:01I'm Rutherford E Abbott.
0:02:01 > 0:02:03Listen, mate, do yourself a favour before I start getting angry, all right?
0:02:06 > 0:02:08Rutherford E Abbott.
0:02:09 > 0:02:12Walk along, please. Stop bothering me and go away.
0:02:14 > 0:02:16I don't want to cause a scene here, you see.
0:02:16 > 0:02:18All these people know who I am.
0:02:18 > 0:02:20- I don't care.- Do you watch Doctors?
0:02:20 > 0:02:22- Walk away.- Have you seen Doctors?
0:02:22 > 0:02:25- Walk away now.- Dr Phonia.
0:02:25 > 0:02:26I'm Dr Phonia in...
0:02:26 > 0:02:29- Please walk away.- ..in Doctors.
0:02:29 > 0:02:31- Walk away now. - Do you remember Grange Hill?
0:02:31 > 0:02:33Walk away now. Do yourself a favour and go.
0:02:33 > 0:02:35Come to this, then, has it?
0:02:35 > 0:02:37OK, what's your name?
0:02:37 > 0:02:41Are you some type of fucking weirdo or what?
0:02:41 > 0:02:43That straw just went up your nose.
0:02:43 > 0:02:46- Suck it. - Have you seen the Pop-Tarts advert?
0:02:46 > 0:02:48Listen, do yourself a flavour and fuck off.
0:02:48 > 0:02:51- I'm with company.- Eldorado?
0:02:51 > 0:02:54What's your name? Your name?
0:02:54 > 0:02:55Give me your name.
0:02:55 > 0:03:00No? You're not going to give me your name? OK.
0:03:00 > 0:03:04There we go. I'll leave you with this. Thank you very much,
0:03:04 > 0:03:08Mr Grumpy. Mr Grumpy.
0:03:08 > 0:03:10Have a good day, Mr Grumpy!
0:03:16 > 0:03:18Meanwhile, My Familee,
0:03:18 > 0:03:23starring some geriatric jokers and a fast-food delivery man.
0:03:23 > 0:03:25Some old sod has ordered
0:03:25 > 0:03:28a colostomy-sized bag load of takeaway grub.
0:03:28 > 0:03:31Unfortunately, they've got no intention of paying for it.
0:03:31 > 0:03:33- Hello.- Hello.
0:03:33 > 0:03:35So what have we got here?
0:03:35 > 0:03:38This Chinese is £33, please.
0:03:38 > 0:03:42I didn't order a Chinese. Maureen probably did.
0:03:42 > 0:03:44You called already, please.
0:03:44 > 0:03:46I'm going to go and get her now. One minute.
0:03:53 > 0:03:56- You're the lovely curry man, yes? - Yeah, it's £33, please.
0:03:56 > 0:03:59Oh, all right, OK. Oh, is it getting cold?
0:03:59 > 0:04:02- I can take that in and then get Judy to give you the money.- OK.
0:04:02 > 0:04:04OK, thank you.
0:04:11 > 0:04:14All right, love?
0:04:14 > 0:04:18- It's nice food?- Very nice. I'm getting you the money now, love.
0:04:18 > 0:04:22But the money is under the cat and the cat's asleep.
0:04:22 > 0:04:28I don't like waking the cat because she can be a little bit feisty.
0:04:28 > 0:04:31Do you mind just waiting until the cat wakes up?
0:04:31 > 0:04:32The restaurant is very busy.
0:04:32 > 0:04:36- Do you want me to go and wake up the cat?- Please.- All right, then.
0:04:39 > 0:04:41She said the money is under the cat.
0:04:41 > 0:04:45SCREECHING AND SMASHING
0:04:48 > 0:04:52The cat's eaten the money, love, and half of my face.
0:04:52 > 0:04:56Boss, the cat is very angry with the...you know.
0:04:56 > 0:05:01Give me the phone. Hello. I've asked the driver to get a bread knife
0:05:01 > 0:05:06to help me open up the stomach of my cat
0:05:06 > 0:05:10and pull out the money from the inside of the cat,
0:05:10 > 0:05:13but he's shaking his head and he's said, "No, love."
0:05:13 > 0:05:16And I don't know what to do.
0:05:16 > 0:05:21So I don't think I'll be giving him a tip. Bye-bye.
0:05:21 > 0:05:24I'll give you a call when the cat does a poo.
0:05:25 > 0:05:27Sleep tight.
0:05:27 > 0:05:29Boss?
0:05:33 > 0:05:35Lady Mash,
0:05:35 > 0:05:38featuring a typical northern man on tour
0:05:38 > 0:05:42and a helpful local Londoner.
0:05:42 > 0:05:45Excuse me, mate, could you do us a favour
0:05:45 > 0:05:48and just take a couple of snaps for me just, er, just up here?
0:05:48 > 0:05:51- Is that all right?- Yes. - Oh, cheers, amazing.
0:05:53 > 0:05:55- Oh, great.- Top button, yeah? - That's it, yeah.
0:05:55 > 0:05:57It's my first time down in London and I want some pictures
0:05:57 > 0:06:00to send up to my friends up in Bradford at the factory.
0:06:00 > 0:06:06Right, I've got to get some poses, so count me down from three to one.
0:06:06 > 0:06:09- 3...2...1.- Wahey! London!
0:06:09 > 0:06:12- Right, can I just do one more?- Yeah.
0:06:15 > 0:06:16Right one more, mate, last one.
0:06:16 > 0:06:18You're seeing the bridge and everything, yeah?
0:06:18 > 0:06:20Count me down from three to one.
0:06:20 > 0:06:233...2...1.
0:06:23 > 0:06:26Whoahh!
0:06:26 > 0:06:28Eh?
0:06:28 > 0:06:30What do you think of these, eh?
0:06:30 > 0:06:33- Do you want to mash 'em? - No, you're sweet, you're sweet.
0:06:33 > 0:06:35Go on, have a little mash.
0:06:35 > 0:06:38Come on, mash, mash, mash, mash.
0:06:38 > 0:06:40Come on, little mash, mash, mash, mash, eh?
0:06:40 > 0:06:43Cheers, mate, nice one.
0:06:43 > 0:06:44The Verminhater,
0:06:44 > 0:06:48featuring a deeply disturbed pest controller,
0:06:48 > 0:06:51and Elizabeth, an enchanting office temp.
0:06:53 > 0:06:55PHONE RINGS
0:06:55 > 0:06:57Hello.
0:06:57 > 0:07:00- Yeah, pest control.- OK.
0:07:04 > 0:07:05Hi.
0:07:05 > 0:07:08So I understand you've got an infestation.
0:07:08 > 0:07:11Well, not you personally, the building.
0:07:11 > 0:07:13If you had any medical problems,
0:07:13 > 0:07:17I couldn't help you with them, but pests I can.
0:07:17 > 0:07:21- I'll...- Through here, you say? - Yeah, I'll buzz you through.
0:07:21 > 0:07:23That's it.
0:07:30 > 0:07:32You've definitely got rats.
0:07:32 > 0:07:35You know, I've been doing this job ten years, right?
0:07:35 > 0:07:39If there's one thing I hate more than anything in the world,
0:07:39 > 0:07:41- it's bloody rats.- Me too.
0:07:41 > 0:07:43I've had it with them, had it.
0:07:53 > 0:07:56- Really?- Positive, love.
0:08:16 > 0:08:18Buzz us in.
0:08:25 > 0:08:29METALLIC CLATTERING Where are you, you little bastards?!
0:08:30 > 0:08:34THUMPING Agh, let me out! You shitbags!
0:08:34 > 0:08:38Die, you son of a bitch!
0:08:49 > 0:08:50You're clearly mental.
0:08:55 > 0:08:58- Got the little bastard.- Right... - He won't be bothering you again.
0:08:58 > 0:09:01What am I supposed to do with that mess now?
0:09:09 > 0:09:11- Afternoon.- Bye.
0:09:14 > 0:09:20# Ben, the two of us need look no more
0:09:20 > 0:09:27# We both found what we were looking for
0:09:27 > 0:09:32# With a friend to call my own
0:09:32 > 0:09:36# I'll never be alone
0:09:36 > 0:09:39# And you, my friend, will see
0:09:39 > 0:09:44# You've got a friend in me
0:09:44 > 0:09:46# You've got a friend in me... #
0:09:49 > 0:09:50Slaphead,
0:09:50 > 0:09:53starring a man who seeks completion
0:09:53 > 0:09:56and canine stylist, Rachael.
0:10:19 > 0:10:20Hello.
0:10:24 > 0:10:26What are you doing?
0:10:53 > 0:10:55It's OK, I'm Gay,
0:10:55 > 0:10:59featuring a gay stereotype,
0:10:59 > 0:11:01the delicious Dichell
0:11:01 > 0:11:04and her boyfriend, Nizar.
0:11:07 > 0:11:08Dichell has set her boyfriend up
0:11:08 > 0:11:12because he gets too jealous when other guys pay her attention.
0:11:12 > 0:11:15She's brought him along to this boutique store
0:11:15 > 0:11:16to meet style guru Mikael,
0:11:16 > 0:11:22but Nizar has no need to worry because he's clearly gay...or is he?
0:11:22 > 0:11:26Look at those hips!
0:11:26 > 0:11:30You are a lucky boy, you are!
0:11:30 > 0:11:32It's OK, I'm gay.
0:11:32 > 0:11:35I think that's going fit you like a glove, that.
0:11:37 > 0:11:39A very sexy glove, I have to say.
0:11:39 > 0:11:41Oh, thank you.
0:11:41 > 0:11:45- I might as well try it.- Go on, pop it in here, let me put you in here.
0:11:45 > 0:11:47Fantastic.
0:11:47 > 0:11:51So have you got any exciting plans for t'weekend?
0:11:51 > 0:11:53I have a surprise, yeah, but she doesn't know it yet,
0:11:53 > 0:11:54so I can't say it out loud right now.
0:11:54 > 0:11:56Ah! Did you hear that?
0:11:56 > 0:11:58Oh, are you decent in there?
0:11:58 > 0:12:00Oh! She's not.
0:12:00 > 0:12:04That's a lovely pair, that is.
0:12:04 > 0:12:06Hey!
0:12:06 > 0:12:09Pop that mirror back, let's have a look.
0:12:09 > 0:12:11She's got great breasts, hasn't she?
0:12:11 > 0:12:15I tell you what. Your nipples are the perkiest nipples
0:12:15 > 0:12:17I've ever seen in my life.
0:12:17 > 0:12:19No, they are! They're like little bullets.
0:12:19 > 0:12:22It's OK, I'm gay.
0:12:22 > 0:12:24It's a good fit. I just want to see what support
0:12:24 > 0:12:27- you're getting there, yeah?- Yeah.
0:12:28 > 0:12:30Wow, look at that.
0:12:30 > 0:12:32Hmm?
0:12:32 > 0:12:34Fabulous.
0:12:34 > 0:12:36I've got a better suggestion for you if that's OK.
0:12:36 > 0:12:38Are you open to suggestions?
0:12:38 > 0:12:42- Yeah. Why not? - Right, bear with me one second.
0:12:48 > 0:12:50- Thank you.- Mick! Mick!
0:12:50 > 0:12:53- You take your time, love. - Hey! Geezer!
0:12:56 > 0:12:59- Right, what shall we do? - What are you doing here?
0:12:59 > 0:13:00I've got a little surprise for you.
0:13:00 > 0:13:03- What?- You know that bird you pulled last Saturday?
0:13:03 > 0:13:05- Jesus Christ.- I've got photos of her.
0:13:05 > 0:13:06Look at that.
0:13:06 > 0:13:10- Jesus fuck...- Shoosh! Yeah, we were at it like bloody rabbits that night.
0:13:10 > 0:13:12Those are beautiful, actually.
0:13:12 > 0:13:14Have a look at that.
0:13:16 > 0:13:18I'm doing the gay thing.
0:13:18 > 0:13:21Oh, that old game. That always works, don't it?
0:13:21 > 0:13:23Look, you'd better fuck off.
0:13:23 > 0:13:26Yeah. Good luck with that.
0:13:26 > 0:13:29Right, we're going to get you out of this. We'll just get her out of this.
0:13:29 > 0:13:31You're going to prefer the next one.
0:13:31 > 0:13:34Right, that's it, there we go.
0:13:34 > 0:13:37Right, that's it, take... Oh, there you go. There they are.
0:13:37 > 0:13:40Lovely. Oh, very nice.
0:13:41 > 0:13:44- Wow, they are absolutely stunning, aren't they?- Dichell?
0:13:44 > 0:13:47Absolutely stunning, all right, everything's all right, don't worry.
0:13:47 > 0:13:49Best be off now.
0:13:49 > 0:13:52- It's OK, I'm gay. - So I've been told.
0:13:52 > 0:13:55Can you just turn round and bend over a little bit?
0:13:55 > 0:13:58- Dichell?- Jiggly, jiggly. - Get changed, we're going.
0:13:58 > 0:14:02Jiggly, jiggly, jiggly, that's it, s'all right, no rush, don't worry.
0:14:02 > 0:14:04- There is, there is. - Don't want to tear this.
0:14:04 > 0:14:06- Dichell?- Yeah?
0:14:06 > 0:14:09- Put your clothes on, we're going. - OK, I'm just getting changed.
0:14:09 > 0:14:10It's ok mate, I'm gay!
0:14:12 > 0:14:15Is this any bigger than what you're used to?
0:14:16 > 0:14:18- Do you want me to show you out? - I'm fine thanks.
0:14:18 > 0:14:22Let me show you out, come on, come on, take my hand.
0:14:22 > 0:14:25Oh, I'm sorry, it's a bit sticky that.
0:14:25 > 0:14:29Auto Recognition System of Entry.
0:14:29 > 0:14:33Starring the A.R.S.E.
0:14:33 > 0:14:36And special guest, the maintenance man.
0:14:45 > 0:14:47- Hello?- Welcome.
0:14:47 > 0:14:48Hello?
0:14:48 > 0:14:52Please state the name of the person you are here to see.
0:14:52 > 0:14:55Steven Var.
0:14:55 > 0:14:59You have requested Marcus Garvey.
0:14:59 > 0:15:02- Is that correct?- No.
0:15:02 > 0:15:07Are you here to perform maintenance?
0:15:07 > 0:15:09- Yes.- Thank you.
0:15:09 > 0:15:12Please state your name.
0:15:14 > 0:15:16- Joseph.- Joseph.
0:15:16 > 0:15:20Please state your surname.
0:15:20 > 0:15:21Searson.
0:15:22 > 0:15:24Jamie Searson.
0:15:24 > 0:15:30- Please confirm our security check.- Oh, for...
0:15:30 > 0:15:36Do you know which company Steven Var works for?
0:15:36 > 0:15:37Yes.
0:15:37 > 0:15:41Please choose from the following options.
0:15:41 > 0:15:45Peterson Monoprint,
0:15:45 > 0:15:47- is that correct?- No.
0:15:47 > 0:15:49Hammersley and Potter.
0:15:49 > 0:15:52- Is that correct?- No.
0:15:52 > 0:15:55Far Cough and Die.
0:15:55 > 0:15:59- Is that correct?- Far Cough and Die?
0:15:59 > 0:16:04There is really no need for abusive language.
0:16:08 > 0:16:11Goodbye.
0:16:15 > 0:16:16Meet the Movie Buff.
0:16:16 > 0:16:20Introducing the new boyfriend.
0:16:20 > 0:16:22His accomplice, Kimberly
0:16:22 > 0:16:26and her dear mum and dad, Richard and Caroline.
0:16:26 > 0:16:29To a lovely lunch and to finally meet the parents.
0:16:29 > 0:16:33Now, pay attention, Kimberley isn't really Ross's girlfriend,
0:16:33 > 0:16:36but she's told Mum and Dad that she is so he can invite them to
0:16:36 > 0:16:39his house for lunch and meet them for the very first time.
0:16:39 > 0:16:40Got that?
0:16:40 > 0:16:43How long have you been, if you don't mind me asking?
0:16:43 > 0:16:45- 28 years. - We've been married 28.
0:16:45 > 0:16:48What would you say is the secret to, er, longevity?
0:16:48 > 0:16:51Give and take. Take a lot.
0:16:53 > 0:16:56So far, it's all going swimmingly.
0:16:56 > 0:16:58So, we need to eat.
0:16:58 > 0:17:01- I'm going to the loo first. - Oh, I'll just give you two minutes.
0:17:01 > 0:17:03But it's now time to talk movies.
0:17:03 > 0:17:05What did you get up to last night?
0:17:05 > 0:17:07Anything?
0:17:07 > 0:17:09He did the usual, he fell asleep.
0:17:09 > 0:17:11- I fell asleep in the chair. - Did ya?
0:17:11 > 0:17:12And what were you watching?
0:17:12 > 0:17:15It was, Coronation Street?
0:17:15 > 0:17:17I saw this amazing film last night.
0:17:17 > 0:17:19It was like one of these... space movie
0:17:21 > 0:17:24and there was this one bit where there's this bloke and...
0:17:24 > 0:17:29he's got this thing stuck to his face.
0:17:29 > 0:17:32I don't know how to describe it, it was like a cross between
0:17:32 > 0:17:36an octopus and a spider but it was... is this ringing a bells?
0:17:37 > 0:17:39- Yeah.- Spiderman?
0:17:39 > 0:17:41No, it was there and he's sat there
0:17:41 > 0:17:44as if everything's gone back to normal.
0:17:44 > 0:17:46The table looks similar to this.
0:17:46 > 0:17:48He's there, eating these noodles like that,
0:17:48 > 0:17:50and he starts goes like this.
0:17:53 > 0:17:57MAKES WRETCHING NOISES
0:17:57 > 0:18:00Oh, I'm sorry for laughing. Oh, God, excuse me.
0:18:05 > 0:18:06Do you want a pat on the back?
0:18:34 > 0:18:37SCREECHING
0:18:44 > 0:18:46(Is he all right?)
0:19:00 > 0:19:02Do you know what it was?
0:19:02 > 0:19:03Alien.
0:19:06 > 0:19:09The Canine Conundrum.
0:19:09 > 0:19:12Starring a vulnerable old lady
0:19:12 > 0:19:15and a kindly American gentleman.
0:19:15 > 0:19:20Oh, oh, oh, oh!
0:19:20 > 0:19:23Hello, could you just hold...
0:19:23 > 0:19:27Oh, thank you, he's very big but don't worry, he won't bite at all.
0:19:27 > 0:19:28Don't worry.
0:19:28 > 0:19:31Thank you very much, you're very kind.
0:19:31 > 0:19:33Why don't you let me pick that up?
0:19:33 > 0:19:38No, I've been doing this for the last 12 years.
0:19:38 > 0:19:40There's a lot here isn't there?
0:19:42 > 0:19:46Can I just, let me just grab that for one second.
0:19:46 > 0:19:49- Of course.- Oh, could you just, just give that...
0:19:49 > 0:19:51I've just got to get...
0:19:51 > 0:19:53Thank you, there we go.
0:19:53 > 0:19:56I haven't kept you too long have I?
0:19:56 > 0:19:58No, I need to give them back though.
0:19:58 > 0:20:02Were you going anywhere nice?
0:20:02 > 0:20:05No, just home for a business call.
0:20:05 > 0:20:07OK, hello?
0:20:09 > 0:20:12Hello? Can I help you?
0:20:13 > 0:20:15Can I help you stand up?
0:20:17 > 0:20:18Can I help you stand up?
0:20:18 > 0:20:20There we go.
0:20:20 > 0:20:22Are you OK?
0:20:22 > 0:20:24- Oh, he's a big boy, isn't he? - Yes, here we go.
0:20:24 > 0:20:27What's his name?
0:20:27 > 0:20:30Here we go, this is your dog.
0:20:30 > 0:20:32That's my dog?
0:20:32 > 0:20:35- No, it's not my dog.- It is.
0:20:35 > 0:20:38No, I don't, I don't have a dog, what's that in your hand?
0:20:38 > 0:20:41- Is that what I think it is? - This is your dog.- It's not my dog,
0:20:41 > 0:20:44- I couldn't have a dog in my flat. - This is your dog.
0:20:44 > 0:20:46Look, I don't have a dog.
0:20:46 > 0:20:47How can I have a dog?
0:20:47 > 0:20:50He'd never get up my stairs and he'd eat my budgerigar.
0:20:50 > 0:20:53Look, I've had enough now of you and your horrible dog.
0:20:53 > 0:20:56Now, please leave me alone.
0:20:56 > 0:20:59- This is your dog.- You're pushing me to the limits, young man.
0:20:59 > 0:21:01This is your dog.
0:21:01 > 0:21:03I don't like dogs, I don't like cats,
0:21:03 > 0:21:06I don't like frogs, I don't like ferrets.
0:21:06 > 0:21:07Get that filthy mutt away from me.
0:21:07 > 0:21:11- It's your dog, ma'am.- It's not my dog.
0:21:11 > 0:21:14I hate dogs, I've never liked dogs since one bit me on me bum.
0:21:14 > 0:21:17I don't like gerbils, I don't like hamsters.
0:21:17 > 0:21:20- Stop, stop. - What else don't I like?
0:21:20 > 0:21:23- I don't like snakes. - This is your dog, ma'am.
0:21:23 > 0:21:26Have You Got Anything For This?
0:21:26 > 0:21:29Starring a medical oddity
0:21:29 > 0:21:32and a confused pharmacist
0:21:37 > 0:21:39Um, I've got a problem and I just wondered
0:21:39 > 0:21:41basically if you've got anything for it?
0:21:41 > 0:21:46It's a tiny bit embarrassing cos it's, er, it's around the, um,
0:21:46 > 0:21:47back passage...
0:21:47 > 0:21:49- OK.- If you like.
0:21:49 > 0:21:55Every time I try and go, or want to go, I'll try and try and try
0:21:55 > 0:21:58and I just seem to... nothing will pass.
0:21:58 > 0:22:00I can't pass anything, which is strange.
0:22:00 > 0:22:01Nothing wants to...
0:22:01 > 0:22:04- How long's this been going on? - Nothing wants to come out.
0:22:04 > 0:22:06- Three months.- Three months?
0:22:06 > 0:22:09Yeah, now, um, can I just show you something quickly.
0:22:09 > 0:22:13If you could just have a look at this, have you got anything for this?
0:22:15 > 0:22:18Can you see?
0:22:18 > 0:22:21That... no, you need to see a doctor about this, definitely.
0:22:21 > 0:22:24Is there nothing I can take that will...
0:22:24 > 0:22:29No, er, this is not obviously the place for..
0:22:29 > 0:22:32I haven't even been able to break wind for months.
0:22:32 > 0:22:34- Yeah.- There's such a build up of gas.
0:22:34 > 0:22:36Would you put your pants on?
0:22:36 > 0:22:38You shouldn't be pulling them in the shop.
0:22:38 > 0:22:41Even me burps are starting to smell like farts.
0:22:42 > 0:22:47Oh, it is a pain in the backside.
0:22:47 > 0:22:51OK, thank you very much, thank you.
0:22:51 > 0:22:53Try It Before You Buy It.
0:22:53 > 0:22:59Starring a man still living in the 1980s and a hapless hifi seller.
0:22:59 > 0:23:03This Machiavellian moptop, is shopping for a new stereo
0:23:03 > 0:23:07and very sensibly wishes to try it before he buys it.
0:23:07 > 0:23:08Can I help you?
0:23:08 > 0:23:12Er, yeah, yeah, I hope so, I'm looking for a new sound system,
0:23:12 > 0:23:15something that can really spit out a nice sound.
0:23:17 > 0:23:19If you could just show me what you've got.
0:23:19 > 0:23:22Well, we've got something like this and that amp.
0:23:22 > 0:23:25Then you can go for a CD player.
0:23:25 > 0:23:29Actually mate, would you mind if I were to see what she sounds like
0:23:29 > 0:23:32with a bit of my own poison?
0:23:32 > 0:23:35- Would that be OK?- Yeah.- Great.
0:23:35 > 0:23:38Put that in there like that.
0:23:38 > 0:23:45MUSIC: "Eye of the Tiger" By SURVIVOR
0:23:45 > 0:23:47What a tune, eh?
0:23:59 > 0:24:02I'm loving that mate, absolutely loving that.
0:24:02 > 0:24:04The amp is good, you want to take it?
0:24:04 > 0:24:08- I'll get the box, everything. - Does it come with a remote control?
0:24:08 > 0:24:11I'm a big fan of the remote. Can I try it with the remote control?
0:24:11 > 0:24:14If I want to buy it, I want to try it.
0:24:14 > 0:24:16Right, let's imagine I'm on the toilet,
0:24:16 > 0:24:21I've got a good line of sight, I'm squishing one out.
0:24:21 > 0:24:22So, I'm going to turn it up.
0:24:22 > 0:24:24MUSIC GETS LOUDER
0:24:26 > 0:24:30If I was to do it from like, say out here?
0:24:31 > 0:24:35Where are you going? Come back in, come back in.
0:24:35 > 0:24:36What about from here?
0:24:38 > 0:24:40If I was like that, is that working?
0:24:40 > 0:24:42All right, OK, all right.
0:24:45 > 0:24:47OK, brilliant.
0:24:49 > 0:24:51All right, so I need to have a look
0:24:51 > 0:24:55at some CDs and then I think we'll seal the deal.
0:24:55 > 0:24:57Just these, the CDs.
0:24:59 > 0:25:02- Stay there! - All right, all right, cool it, man.
0:25:02 > 0:25:05It's all right, man. TURNS MUSIC UP
0:25:05 > 0:25:11Right, those CDs just there, those CDs, can you just, er...
0:25:13 > 0:25:16Friend, what's wrong with you? Can you go out please?
0:25:31 > 0:25:34Eye of the tiger, eye of the tiger!
0:25:38 > 0:25:40I've tried it, I'm not going to buy it.
0:25:47 > 0:25:50My name's Ross Lee, you're on TV.
0:25:50 > 0:25:53I'm Ross Lee, you're on TV, there's a camera there.
0:25:53 > 0:25:54What do you mean, we're on TV?
0:25:54 > 0:25:56There's a camera through here.
0:25:58 > 0:26:00I knew you had!
0:26:00 > 0:26:03He is clearly insane.
0:26:04 > 0:26:06You fucking bastard.
0:26:06 > 0:26:08# Da-da-da-da-da!
0:26:08 > 0:26:11- Why did you do this? - Because I knew you could take it.
0:26:11 > 0:26:14You were brilliant, nice one mate, God bless you. Thanks a lot.
0:26:14 > 0:26:17I can't believe it.
0:26:17 > 0:26:19Next time on The Pranker.
0:26:19 > 0:26:21Excuse me, you're not allowed to do that.
0:26:24 > 0:26:26I'm showing you my tits.
0:26:26 > 0:26:28Now give us a meat pie.
0:26:28 > 0:26:33Fuck me, I think it's a fucking tiger, aaarghhh!
0:26:39 > 0:26:42Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd
0:26:42 > 0:26:45E-mail subtitling@bbc.co.uk