The Royal Art of Blackmail

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0:00:35 > 0:00:38Ah, back at your old stomping ground, I see, Hubble.

0:00:38 > 0:00:40The Palace car park.

0:00:40 > 0:00:44I've got a little present for the boys at the gatehouse.

0:00:46 > 0:00:47What do you think?

0:00:47 > 0:00:49What is it?

0:00:49 > 0:00:51I made it at the weekend.

0:00:51 > 0:00:57It's a Mini-Metro wing mirror and a torch taped to a golf club.

0:00:57 > 0:01:01Ideal for under-car surveillance.

0:01:02 > 0:01:04Excuse me, I'll show you.

0:01:04 > 0:01:09You see, now, with this, you can scan the entire

0:01:09 > 0:01:11underside of the vehicle

0:01:11 > 0:01:16and with the torch, of course, you can view any...

0:01:19 > 0:01:20Hubble, I don't think...

0:01:20 > 0:01:23No. Stay back, stay back, please. I know exactly what I'm doing.

0:01:27 > 0:01:28HE STRAINS

0:01:30 > 0:01:32EXHAUST RATTLES

0:01:55 > 0:01:57Can I give you a hand with that?

0:01:57 > 0:01:59OK, you get in there, I'll pass it to you.

0:01:59 > 0:02:02There we go. Got that in?

0:02:02 > 0:02:04OK, carry on.

0:02:15 > 0:02:18Captain Hubble, Sir Edward.

0:02:18 > 0:02:20Ah, morning, Hubble.

0:02:20 > 0:02:22Good morning, sir.

0:02:22 > 0:02:24Thank you for coming so quickly.

0:02:24 > 0:02:28I take it you heard about yesterday's burglary at the Palace.

0:02:28 > 0:02:31Burglary?! No, sir.

0:02:31 > 0:02:33But frankly, I'm not surprised.

0:02:33 > 0:02:36I have mentioned on a number of occasions to Colonel Whittington

0:02:36 > 0:02:40how sloppy some of the security personnel have become.

0:02:40 > 0:02:44- And Colonel Whittington for you, Sir Edward.- Ah, come in, Dennis.

0:02:44 > 0:02:47I was just updating Hubble on yesterday's burglary.

0:02:47 > 0:02:50Shameful, sir. Shameful.

0:02:50 > 0:02:53Needless to say, Her Majesty is furious.

0:02:53 > 0:02:54Are we any the wiser?

0:02:54 > 0:02:57Well, we do seem to have one very obvious lead, sir.

0:02:57 > 0:02:59- Oh.- May I?

0:02:59 > 0:03:04We've trawled yesterday's CCTV footage.

0:03:04 > 0:03:07You can only imagine our surprise.

0:03:07 > 0:03:09Thank you, sir.

0:03:18 > 0:03:19Well, Hubble?

0:03:23 > 0:03:24He looks familiar.

0:03:24 > 0:03:25What?

0:03:25 > 0:03:28I've got a feeling that I've seen him before.

0:03:28 > 0:03:30It's YOU, Hubble!

0:03:30 > 0:03:31What?

0:03:35 > 0:03:36Good grief, so it is!

0:03:36 > 0:03:38What's going on, Hubble?

0:03:38 > 0:03:40Sir, I was coming back from the car park

0:03:40 > 0:03:44and I saw these two men struggling with something.

0:03:44 > 0:03:46- A £2 million Titian.- Was it?

0:03:46 > 0:03:50Well, anyway I said I'd give them a hand to get it into their van.

0:03:50 > 0:03:53Along with a Reubens, a Gainsborough and two Stubbs!

0:03:53 > 0:03:55How, Hubble? How?

0:03:55 > 0:03:58Because the man's a buffoon, sir.

0:03:58 > 0:04:00Four men enter the palace unchallenged

0:04:00 > 0:04:03and walk out with millions of pounds worth of art,

0:04:03 > 0:04:06aided and abetted by The Royal Bodyguard!?

0:04:08 > 0:04:09What am I going to tell Her Majesty?

0:04:13 > 0:04:15I'm sorry, sir.

0:04:15 > 0:04:21I have no other option... than to tender my resignation.

0:04:21 > 0:04:23Accepted.

0:04:23 > 0:04:26Her Majesty deserves the best

0:04:26 > 0:04:30and I'm afraid I've let her down.

0:04:30 > 0:04:33I'll book you a cab. We'll send your things on in a box.

0:04:33 > 0:04:35KNOCKING

0:04:35 > 0:04:37Palace on line two.

0:04:37 > 0:04:42Oh... Gentlemen, would you mind waiting here?

0:04:42 > 0:04:44I'll take it outside.

0:04:44 > 0:04:46Can I get you both something to drink?

0:04:46 > 0:04:49How about some Champagne?

0:04:49 > 0:04:54- Sorry?- Oh, let your hair down, Miss Gifford. You only live once!

0:04:54 > 0:04:56Builders' tea or instant?

0:04:57 > 0:05:00So, it's goodbye, Hubble.

0:05:00 > 0:05:04I always knew it was only a matter of time.

0:05:04 > 0:05:08Well, that's what I kept telling myself in the dark hours of the night.

0:05:09 > 0:05:13Oh, sometimes life can spring upon you untold joys.

0:05:13 > 0:05:15Don't you agree, Miss Gifford?

0:05:21 > 0:05:23That was Her Majesty herself.

0:05:23 > 0:05:26She attaches no blame to Hubble.

0:05:26 > 0:05:27- What?!- No.

0:05:27 > 0:05:32She won't hear a word against him.

0:05:32 > 0:05:34It's the fools who let the van in that she's got in her sights.

0:05:34 > 0:05:39She wants Hubble to monitor the investigation,

0:05:39 > 0:05:41in partnership with Scotland Yard.

0:05:41 > 0:05:44I would be honoured, sir.

0:05:44 > 0:05:45- But he's resigned!- Dennis...

0:05:45 > 0:05:50- Did you tell Her Majesty he's resigned?- She is adamant.

0:05:50 > 0:05:51Report to me ASAP.

0:05:51 > 0:05:53Yes, sir.

0:05:53 > 0:05:55Thank you, sir.

0:05:55 > 0:05:57And don't worry, sir.

0:05:57 > 0:05:59I won't let you down.

0:06:52 > 0:06:54Oh, just get back...

0:07:16 > 0:07:19What on earth are you doing?

0:07:19 > 0:07:20Sorry?

0:07:20 > 0:07:24Oh, I'm so sorry. Sorry. it just, er, fell off the wall.

0:07:24 > 0:07:28I think the thieves must have been tampering with this one as well.

0:07:28 > 0:07:30If you could just...

0:07:33 > 0:07:35Thank you.

0:07:35 > 0:07:37HE LAUGHS NERVOUSLY

0:07:37 > 0:07:41- Sir Ambrose Hamilton, isn't it? - It is.

0:07:41 > 0:07:44Yes. Guy Hubble, Royal Bodyguard.

0:07:44 > 0:07:47Please don't let me stop you.

0:07:47 > 0:07:51I would just like to ask you a few questions, if I may?

0:07:51 > 0:07:57So, what's it like being the Surveyor of The Queen's Paintings?

0:07:57 > 0:07:59It is a great honour.

0:07:59 > 0:08:03So, could you tell me something about these stolen pictures?

0:08:03 > 0:08:06They're the crown jewels of the Queen's collection.

0:08:06 > 0:08:09The most valuable paintings in this room.

0:08:09 > 0:08:14So, you're saying that the thieves must have been well informed?

0:08:14 > 0:08:16They must have been.

0:08:16 > 0:08:18Or well briefed,

0:08:18 > 0:08:21by someone who was an acknowledged expert...

0:08:26 > 0:08:27Are you all right?

0:08:29 > 0:08:30Sorry, what?

0:08:30 > 0:08:33Yes, no, fine. Fine.

0:08:33 > 0:08:35Just...you know, just checking.

0:08:35 > 0:08:37For, uh...footprints.

0:08:37 > 0:08:39There aren't any. It's all right.

0:08:39 > 0:08:42You do know there's no back to this settee, don't you?

0:08:42 > 0:08:45It's a Louis Quinze chaise longue.

0:08:45 > 0:08:47Well, it's a pity Louis didn't finish it.

0:08:47 > 0:08:50Her Majesty deserves something a little better at her age,

0:08:50 > 0:08:54don't you think? I mean, something with a bit of support.

0:08:54 > 0:08:56You can't expect an elderly lady...

0:08:56 > 0:08:57DOOR OPENS

0:08:57 > 0:08:59Ah! There you are, sir.

0:08:59 > 0:09:04I was just running through a few things with Sir Ambrose.

0:09:04 > 0:09:07Yes, sir. Ahem...

0:09:07 > 0:09:11I have my suspicions about Sir Ambrose.

0:09:13 > 0:09:14He's as good as admitted

0:09:14 > 0:09:17that the thieves knew exactly what paintings to take.

0:09:17 > 0:09:20Now who could be better to advise them

0:09:20 > 0:09:23than the Surveyor of the Queen's Paintings?

0:09:23 > 0:09:27I suggest we interview him properly.

0:09:27 > 0:09:29You know, we do the old "good cop, bad cop" routine.

0:09:29 > 0:09:32- Hubble... - Sir, there is something wrong.

0:09:32 > 0:09:35I know there is. I can feel it in my water. Trust me.

0:09:35 > 0:09:37Sorry about that, Sir Ambrose.

0:09:37 > 0:09:41This is Colonel Whittington.

0:09:41 > 0:09:45He and I would like to ask you a few more questions, if we may.

0:09:45 > 0:09:47Would you like to sit down?

0:09:47 > 0:09:48I really am rather busy.

0:09:48 > 0:09:50Yes, I'm sure. Yes, of course.

0:09:51 > 0:09:53Can I offer you a mint?

0:09:57 > 0:10:00Where were you yesterday, Sir Ambrose?

0:10:00 > 0:10:02At an auction house all day.

0:10:02 > 0:10:05- Do you have witnesses to corroborate that?- I do. A number.

0:10:05 > 0:10:09So you can provide us with a list of those witnesses, I suppose?

0:10:09 > 0:10:12- Fine. No problem at all.- Oh, good.

0:10:12 > 0:10:13Sir, just a sec.

0:10:13 > 0:10:16Sorry. I've forgotten. Am I good cop or bad cop?

0:10:16 > 0:10:18- Bad cop.- Bad cop. Thank you, sir.

0:10:18 > 0:10:21OK, come on. Give me my mint back.

0:10:21 > 0:10:24- I'm sucking it. - I don't care. Hand it over.

0:10:24 > 0:10:25Come on. There you are.

0:10:31 > 0:10:34Is it usual for picture restorers to come to the Palace?

0:10:34 > 0:10:37Once or twice a year, yes.

0:10:37 > 0:10:38Answer the question!

0:10:38 > 0:10:40I just have!

0:10:40 > 0:10:43And you would always authorise such a visit?

0:10:43 > 0:10:45I would.

0:10:45 > 0:10:46All right.

0:10:46 > 0:10:50Why are you wearing carpet slippers in the Palace?

0:10:50 > 0:10:52I suffer from corns.

0:10:52 > 0:10:54Oh, all right.

0:10:54 > 0:10:58So do you have any idea where the thieves got hold of an authorisation

0:10:58 > 0:11:00bearing your signature?

0:11:00 > 0:11:02Well, a forgery, obviously.

0:11:06 > 0:11:07Ah!

0:11:08 > 0:11:10Hubble!

0:11:10 > 0:11:12What are you doing?

0:11:12 > 0:11:16Sorry, sir, a tiger seems to have attached itself to my foot.

0:11:16 > 0:11:19Careful, that's a present from the tenth Maharajah of Jaipur!

0:11:19 > 0:11:21I can't get it off!

0:11:21 > 0:11:23- Hubble!- Yes, sir!

0:11:23 > 0:11:25Keep your foot still!

0:11:25 > 0:11:27I can't! Ouch!

0:11:27 > 0:11:29Ow!

0:11:29 > 0:11:30Sir? We've just...

0:11:34 > 0:11:38- We got a call demanding £5 million in return for the paintings.- What?

0:11:38 > 0:11:41We don't think it's a crank call, but they want the money

0:11:41 > 0:11:44delivered tomorrow at a location of their choosing.

0:11:44 > 0:11:46Sir Edward is liaising with Number Ten.

0:11:46 > 0:11:48Sir. Let me be the man

0:11:48 > 0:11:53who hands over the money at a location of their own choosing.

0:11:53 > 0:11:55I'll get the art back, sir.

0:11:55 > 0:11:59- Hubble, no!- It would be putting Hubble in great danger, sir.

0:12:15 > 0:12:16Ah, there you are, sir.

0:12:18 > 0:12:20I've got you a frothy coffee, sir.

0:12:20 > 0:12:23- What?- It's made with soya milk. Frothy coffee.

0:12:23 > 0:12:25- Ever had a frothy coffee with soya milk?- No.

0:12:25 > 0:12:29I'm trying to give up dairy products, sir, so...

0:12:29 > 0:12:31Try it, try it. Frothy coffee.

0:12:31 > 0:12:32- Hubble.- Sir?

0:12:32 > 0:12:35I've got £5 million in this case,

0:12:35 > 0:12:37over 40 officers committed to the operation.

0:12:37 > 0:12:39Stop prattling on about frothy coffee!

0:12:39 > 0:12:42Yes, sir. Sorry, sir.

0:12:42 > 0:12:44Now take the money.

0:12:44 > 0:12:46Wait in the park until approached.

0:12:46 > 0:12:48Are you wearing your wire?

0:12:48 > 0:12:49Of course I'm wearing a wire, sir.

0:12:49 > 0:12:51Is it plugged in?

0:12:51 > 0:12:53Yes, of course it's...

0:12:59 > 0:13:00Yes. Yes, it's plugged in.

0:13:00 > 0:13:02I have ten marksmen in situ.

0:13:02 > 0:13:03Right.

0:13:03 > 0:13:06We'll be watching for you to be approached.

0:13:06 > 0:13:07Now remember,

0:13:07 > 0:13:09don't release the money.

0:13:09 > 0:13:11Your job is to lead us to the art

0:13:11 > 0:13:13and the centre of their organisation.

0:13:13 > 0:13:15Yes, of course.

0:13:15 > 0:13:17You've got the right man for the job, sir.

0:13:17 > 0:13:20Hubble, I can't stress how much the Treasury are keen

0:13:20 > 0:13:21that you don't lose the money.

0:13:21 > 0:13:23Absolutely, sir.

0:13:25 > 0:13:26Well, sir.

0:13:26 > 0:13:28I won't salute, if you don't mind,

0:13:28 > 0:13:31as I don't want to draw attention to myself.

0:13:31 > 0:13:33- Good idea.- Thank you, sir.

0:13:34 > 0:13:36- Hubble.- Oh?

0:13:36 > 0:13:37You forgot the money.

0:13:38 > 0:13:41Forgot the money. Of course.

0:13:41 > 0:13:43Sorry, sir. Thank you.

0:13:43 > 0:13:46You're meant to handcuff it to your wrist.

0:13:48 > 0:13:50Of course. Handcuff to my wrist.

0:13:50 > 0:13:53Yes, sir. Sorry, sir.

0:13:54 > 0:13:57Were you given the number to the combination lock?

0:13:57 > 0:13:58Yes, sir. 301.

0:13:58 > 0:14:04It's the combined ages of my mother, my father, my Aunt Sybil,

0:14:04 > 0:14:08and her son's dog Mumps when they died.

0:14:08 > 0:14:11I thought I was rather clever with that one,

0:14:11 > 0:14:13because I worked out Mumps' age in dog years.

0:14:13 > 0:14:18You could have just added 3, 0 and 1, and come up with your IQ score.

0:14:19 > 0:14:22Sorry, sir, run that past me again. I didn't quite understand it.

0:14:22 > 0:14:26Remember, you've clung onto this job by the skin of your teeth

0:14:26 > 0:14:30- but one more cock-up...- Don't worry, sir. You can rely on me.

0:14:30 > 0:14:31- Your bill, sir.- It's all right, sir.

0:14:31 > 0:14:33I'll get the bill.

0:14:33 > 0:14:35TEA SPLASHES, CHINA CLATTERS

0:15:00 > 0:15:03Your trousers are drying on the radiator, sir.

0:15:03 > 0:15:06- Thank you, Yates. - What happened to them?

0:15:07 > 0:15:09Hubble spilt coffee over them.

0:15:09 > 0:15:12'Actually, it was soya frothy coffee, sir.'

0:15:12 > 0:15:16Hubble, this channel is to remain open, but you are to be quiet.

0:15:16 > 0:15:18- Understood?- 'Yes, sir.'

0:15:22 > 0:15:25INSECT BUZZING

0:15:45 > 0:15:48What's going on, sir?

0:15:49 > 0:15:51God alone knows.

0:16:03 > 0:16:05Hubble.

0:16:05 > 0:16:08You're meant to be keeping a low profile.

0:16:08 > 0:16:10'There's a vicious bee, sir.

0:16:10 > 0:16:12'Actually, it's gone now.'

0:16:13 > 0:16:16'Ah! Sorry, sir! It's back again.'

0:16:16 > 0:16:19BUZZING RESUMES

0:16:25 > 0:16:28'Definitely gone now, sir. Standing by for the approach.'

0:16:34 > 0:16:37- There you go.- Thank you.

0:16:40 > 0:16:42Excuse me.

0:16:43 > 0:16:45Standing by. This could be the approach.

0:16:45 > 0:16:49- Can you help an old soldier to the gents, young man?- Of course.

0:16:49 > 0:16:50Lean on me.

0:16:51 > 0:16:54I'm not too good on my feet these days.

0:16:54 > 0:16:55All those years marching.

0:16:55 > 0:16:57Mmm.

0:16:59 > 0:17:01Oh, here we go.

0:17:01 > 0:17:03OK. Let's go.

0:17:03 > 0:17:05Green light! Green light!

0:17:27 > 0:17:28In you go, Yates.

0:17:28 > 0:17:30- Me, sir?- Yes. Get on with it.

0:17:35 > 0:17:37Come on, they've got Hubble.

0:17:37 > 0:17:40More importantly, they've got the £5 million.

0:17:40 > 0:17:42STRUGGLING, BANGING

0:17:45 > 0:17:46Ah! Ow!

0:17:47 > 0:17:49Come on, let's go!

0:17:49 > 0:17:52GEARS GRIND

0:17:54 > 0:17:56What's going on? Where are we going?

0:17:56 > 0:18:00Sir! Sir! I'm being kidnapped! They're taking me to...

0:18:00 > 0:18:03- We'll take this wire, if you don't mind.- Ow!

0:18:03 > 0:18:05And the case! Without the handcuffs.

0:18:05 > 0:18:07No, I've lost the key.

0:18:07 > 0:18:10It must have fallen out as you pulled me down the tunnel.

0:18:10 > 0:18:12- Show us the money, then.- No.

0:18:12 > 0:18:14I'll show you the money when you show me the art!

0:18:14 > 0:18:16We see the money or we see your brains.

0:18:16 > 0:18:20- Look, it's a combination lock. - What's the number?

0:18:20 > 0:18:22Wait a minute. I'm just trying to remember.

0:18:22 > 0:18:25My mother's age...plus, uh...

0:18:25 > 0:18:27- What's 12 times 7?- What?

0:18:27 > 0:18:30That's the age of Mumps when he died.

0:18:30 > 0:18:32- Mumps?- Yes, well, you see,

0:18:32 > 0:18:35my cousin had a dog to cheer him up when he had the mumps.

0:18:35 > 0:18:37That's how we called the dog Mumps.

0:18:37 > 0:18:39- Just do it!- All right! I'm...

0:18:39 > 0:18:42Look, you're flustering me now.

0:18:42 > 0:18:44We'll go back to base. Hack open the case there.

0:18:44 > 0:18:46Or just hack his arm off.

0:18:46 > 0:18:49No, wait a minute. Ah. I think I'm remembering now.

0:18:56 > 0:18:57Sir!

0:18:59 > 0:19:02- It runs right through from the toilets.- Good God.

0:19:02 > 0:19:03Wasn't...

0:19:03 > 0:19:06wasn't there an ice cream van parked here?

0:19:07 > 0:19:09So...Hubble has gone missing

0:19:09 > 0:19:11- with the £5 million?- Yes, sir.

0:19:11 > 0:19:14- Oh, God.- But don't worry, sir.

0:19:14 > 0:19:18Hubble's under strict instructions not to lose the money.

0:19:26 > 0:19:29Ah! I've done it. I've done it!

0:19:32 > 0:19:34- Here, hand it over.- No, no.

0:19:34 > 0:19:36This is Her Majesty's money

0:19:36 > 0:19:40and you do not get it until she gets her paintings back!

0:19:40 > 0:19:43- Give it here!- No!- Give it here!

0:19:43 > 0:19:46No! Will you stop it!

0:19:48 > 0:19:50No!

0:19:51 > 0:19:53No!

0:19:53 > 0:19:55Aagh!

0:20:08 > 0:20:09Police!

0:20:09 > 0:20:11Police! Police!

0:20:12 > 0:20:14The van! Move!

0:20:26 > 0:20:28'If you leave your number, he'll call you back.'

0:20:28 > 0:20:29No, I'll hold.

0:20:29 > 0:20:31KNOCKING

0:20:31 > 0:20:36Excuse me, sir. We've had a report of hundreds of £50 notes being scattered in Buckinghamshire.

0:20:36 > 0:20:38- And the serial numbers match. - Any sign of Hubble?

0:20:38 > 0:20:40Er...no. No, sir.

0:20:40 > 0:20:42At least we've got the money.

0:20:54 > 0:20:56Ow!

0:20:56 > 0:20:57Ow!

0:21:05 > 0:21:06What took you?

0:21:06 > 0:21:09Sir Ambrose!

0:21:09 > 0:21:11Yes, Hubble.

0:21:11 > 0:21:12Me.

0:21:12 > 0:21:16I knew it! I knew you were up to no good.

0:21:16 > 0:21:18Well, you were right.

0:21:18 > 0:21:20I knew it, I could feel it in my water.

0:21:20 > 0:21:23You thought you could outsmart everyone.

0:21:23 > 0:21:26Well, you couldn't outsmart Captain...

0:21:26 > 0:21:27Oh, do shut up!

0:21:29 > 0:21:30Where have you been?

0:21:30 > 0:21:32- It's his fault.- What?

0:21:32 > 0:21:33What?

0:21:33 > 0:21:36- We've lost most of the money. - What happened?

0:21:36 > 0:21:40He opened his case by the window. It scattered all over the county.

0:21:40 > 0:21:41How much have we got?

0:21:41 > 0:21:44- About 300 quid.- £300?!

0:21:44 > 0:21:47You ought to be ashamed of yourself, betraying Her Majesty...!

0:21:47 > 0:21:49I say we split the money and run.

0:21:49 > 0:21:52I haven't planned all this for £300.

0:21:52 > 0:21:55No. Nothing's changed.

0:21:55 > 0:21:57We still have the paintings.

0:21:57 > 0:22:00The ransom is still five million.

0:22:02 > 0:22:04PHONE RINGS

0:22:04 > 0:22:05Hastings.

0:22:05 > 0:22:07- 'Sir Edward?'- Yes?

0:22:07 > 0:22:10- 'A call for you.'- Right.

0:22:10 > 0:22:12'We have a friend of yours.'

0:22:12 > 0:22:15And that friend has managed to lose our money.

0:22:15 > 0:22:18'We're going to need another five million.'

0:22:18 > 0:22:20I can't get that.

0:22:20 > 0:22:21You will.

0:22:21 > 0:22:24Otherwise, Hubble here will suffer,

0:22:24 > 0:22:25horribly.

0:22:25 > 0:22:27They're bluffing.

0:22:27 > 0:22:29How do we know that Hubble is still alive?

0:22:31 > 0:22:32Talk to your boss.

0:22:34 > 0:22:35Captain Hubble here, sir.

0:22:35 > 0:22:37Hubble! Are you all right?

0:22:37 > 0:22:39I think...

0:22:39 > 0:22:41they're going to milk me, sir.

0:22:41 > 0:22:42MACHINE WHIRRS

0:22:42 > 0:22:43'Milk you?'

0:22:43 > 0:22:45- Yes. Like a cow, sir.- 'What?'

0:22:45 > 0:22:49Well, they're going to hook me up to this machine unless you pay up.

0:22:49 > 0:22:51I was right about Sir Ambrose!

0:22:51 > 0:22:53Five million in cash,

0:22:53 > 0:22:54in two hours.

0:23:00 > 0:23:01Poor Hubble.

0:23:27 > 0:23:30I can't believe it was Sir Ambrose.

0:23:30 > 0:23:32I mean, he's a Knight of the Realm.

0:23:32 > 0:23:35I always had my suspicions, of course.

0:23:35 > 0:23:38But he's...a Knight of the Realm!

0:23:38 > 0:23:42I think we've got something, sir. We've found the ice cream van.

0:23:55 > 0:23:58It's been well over an hour. I say we kill him.

0:23:58 > 0:24:01- You think they'll pay the money then? - You said this was a doddle.

0:24:01 > 0:24:05- Nothing could go wrong, you said. - I wasn't expecting YOU

0:24:05 > 0:24:08- to throw the money out the window! - Phone your man,

0:24:08 > 0:24:09find out what the hell's happening.

0:24:09 > 0:24:13SIRENS BLARE

0:24:15 > 0:24:18- I'm off.- Yeah, me too!

0:24:20 > 0:24:23Come back!

0:24:23 > 0:24:27It looks like they've left you in the lurch, Sir Ambrose.

0:24:27 > 0:24:28No.

0:24:28 > 0:24:30I've still got you for company.

0:24:30 > 0:24:32You're coming with me.

0:24:32 > 0:24:35No, you're coming with me!

0:24:37 > 0:24:40No. You're coming...

0:24:40 > 0:24:41with me.

0:24:44 > 0:24:47HELICOPTER HOVERS

0:24:53 > 0:24:56It's OK, yes...

0:24:56 > 0:24:58I'm the Royal Bodyguard.

0:25:00 > 0:25:03Everything is... everything's under control.

0:25:03 > 0:25:06Shoot to kill. Don't worry if you miss.

0:25:06 > 0:25:10- Do we have authorisation on that, sir?- Nobody will mind, I promise.

0:25:10 > 0:25:12Back off or he gets it!

0:25:20 > 0:25:24OK, we have a mobile hostage situation, everyone.

0:25:26 > 0:25:29Change now. Third.

0:25:29 > 0:25:31GEARS GRIND, ENGINE REVS

0:25:31 > 0:25:33No, third, not fifth.

0:25:33 > 0:25:35It's you! You're over-revving.

0:25:35 > 0:25:38Oh, just change gear.

0:25:38 > 0:25:39What have you done now?

0:25:39 > 0:25:41VAN JINGLE PLAYS

0:25:41 > 0:25:44I must have pressed one of these buttons here.

0:25:44 > 0:25:45- Turn it off!- All right.

0:25:45 > 0:25:47MOTOR HUMS

0:25:47 > 0:25:49That's the refrigeration unit.

0:25:49 > 0:25:50I don't know, do I?

0:25:50 > 0:25:52It's the first time I've been in one of these things.

0:25:52 > 0:25:55- For God's sake, we're making ice cream now!- Good.

0:25:55 > 0:25:58I can bring you a 99 when you're in your prison cell!

0:25:58 > 0:26:00Do be quiet, you tedious little man.

0:26:00 > 0:26:03You'll never get away with this. Just turn yourself in.

0:26:03 > 0:26:05- Never!- Where are we going anyway?

0:26:05 > 0:26:07Windsor. That's where the Queen is.

0:26:07 > 0:26:11If the old girl wants her pictures back, she can pay for them.

0:26:11 > 0:26:14How dare you speak about Her Majesty

0:26:14 > 0:26:17in such a disrespectful way?! And...

0:26:26 > 0:26:29- Look out! Look out! - I can't see anything!

0:26:29 > 0:26:30GUNSHOT

0:26:30 > 0:26:32Put your foot on the brake!

0:26:32 > 0:26:34Brake, man, will you!

0:26:34 > 0:26:37CRASH

0:26:42 > 0:26:46VAN MUSIC GURGLES TUNELESSLY

0:26:52 > 0:26:54What's the story, Yates?

0:26:54 > 0:26:56Well, a nasty way to go, sir.

0:27:00 > 0:27:03Oh! Yes.

0:27:03 > 0:27:05Any sign of Hubble?

0:27:05 > 0:27:07I doubt he would have survived it, sir.

0:27:07 > 0:27:10The refrigeration unit's been on for ten hours, and...

0:27:10 > 0:27:12SOLID KNOCK

0:27:12 > 0:27:1315 below zero, sir.

0:27:13 > 0:27:16So, it looks like you'll be the Royal Bodyguard now, Yates.

0:27:16 > 0:27:18We're finally rid of Guy Hubble.

0:27:19 > 0:27:21Did you hear that?

0:27:21 > 0:27:22No, sir.

0:27:25 > 0:27:27Yates. Get up there.

0:27:40 > 0:27:44Sir, I think you better come and take a look at this.

0:27:47 > 0:27:50BREATHING

0:28:05 > 0:28:07C-captain Hubble,

0:28:07 > 0:28:09re-reporting for duty, s-s-sir.

0:28:32 > 0:28:35Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd

0:28:35 > 0:28:38E-mail subtitling@bbc.co.uk