0:00:02 > 0:00:07This programme contains very strong language
0:00:09 > 0:00:10How much is all this worth anyway?
0:00:10 > 0:00:12I don't know. Like, ten...
0:00:12 > 0:00:15..seven... This one's probably about fucking 20 or something.
0:00:15 > 0:00:17We could be looking at making, like, 50 quid, like.
0:00:17 > 0:00:20Oh, boy, that's class. New pair of shoes, boy.
0:00:20 > 0:00:22- We could get so much with this. - Yeah!- What are you getting?
0:00:22 > 0:00:25See, I've seen a fuckin', erm, a big blow-up doll in, erm...
0:00:25 > 0:00:28..in the shop. It's, like, this woman, right?
0:00:28 > 0:00:30And she's got, like, long, curly blonde hair
0:00:30 > 0:00:32and when you squeeze her tits
0:00:32 > 0:00:34she goes, "Ooh!"
0:00:34 > 0:00:36What does she go? Do it again?
0:00:36 > 0:00:38She'll go...
0:00:38 > 0:00:40"Ooh!"
0:00:40 > 0:00:43When you squeeze her arse as well, she'll go
0:00:43 > 0:00:45"Ooh!"
0:00:45 > 0:00:48I would call mine Sapphire.
0:00:48 > 0:00:50I'd call mine Reuben.
0:00:53 > 0:00:55That's a guy's name, though.
0:00:55 > 0:00:57- No, it's not, is it?- Yeah, Reuben.
0:00:57 > 0:00:59Yeah, that's a guy's name.
0:01:00 > 0:01:01Reuben...
0:01:04 > 0:01:07Reuben. Reuben!
0:01:07 > 0:01:09- Yeah, see?- Reuben... Oh, yeah.
0:01:09 > 0:01:11Shit.
0:01:11 > 0:01:12Fuck.
0:01:12 > 0:01:14"Ooh!"
0:01:14 > 0:01:16"Sapphire, ooh!"
0:01:17 > 0:01:21That handsome-lookin' fella there is me, Conor MacSweeney.
0:01:21 > 0:01:24- "Ooh!" - And that's me best pal, Jock.
0:01:24 > 0:01:27Everyone's always going on about me trying to be just like him.
0:01:27 > 0:01:29What a load of bullshit!
0:01:29 > 0:01:32Yeah, we have similar haircuts, but that's just the fashion.
0:01:32 > 0:01:35Aside from that, we have our own individual shit goin' on.
0:01:44 > 0:01:47Jock's the kind of fella who'd do anything for a friend.
0:01:47 > 0:01:49Like that time I bumped into Billy Murphy...
0:01:49 > 0:01:50Hi, how's it goin'?
0:01:50 > 0:01:52..and he wanted to borrow me phone.
0:01:52 > 0:01:54Give me yer fuckin' phone!
0:01:55 > 0:01:58HE GIGGLES
0:01:58 > 0:02:00He's the local nut job.
0:02:00 > 0:02:01Jock found this site on the internet
0:02:01 > 0:02:03where ya can send them photos of someone
0:02:03 > 0:02:05and they'd send ya back a mask of their face.
0:02:05 > 0:02:07All right, Billy?
0:02:11 > 0:02:14He then stole a bike from outside the Garda station
0:02:14 > 0:02:17which belonged to Sergeant Healy.
0:02:17 > 0:02:19When they went lookin' for Healy's bike in Billy's gaff,
0:02:19 > 0:02:22they found hash plants instead. Shitloads of them.
0:02:22 > 0:02:25- Ya cunt! I'm gonna fuckin' kill ya. - Shut the fuck up!
0:02:25 > 0:02:27Do you like that? Do you like that?
0:02:27 > 0:02:30- Go on, get your tongue up me hole, prick.- Shut up!- Come on!
0:02:30 > 0:02:32Come on, Healy, you'd like that, wouldn't ya?
0:02:32 > 0:02:34And that was the end of me getting mugged.
0:02:36 > 0:02:38Get into the fucking car!
0:02:41 > 0:02:42It turned into a bit of a cat-and-mouse game
0:02:42 > 0:02:44between Healy and Jock after that.
0:02:46 > 0:02:48- And, you know...- Thank you!
0:02:50 > 0:02:51Healy!
0:02:55 > 0:02:58And here we are, minding our own business when...
0:02:58 > 0:03:03There's two young fellas up on the roof stealing my lead.
0:03:03 > 0:03:05All right, boy?
0:03:06 > 0:03:08What the fuck are you doing?
0:03:08 > 0:03:09Up there.
0:03:11 > 0:03:12Fuckin' idiots.
0:03:16 > 0:03:17Quick, put that on.
0:03:19 > 0:03:20This is a girl's mask.
0:03:20 > 0:03:22It's all they had in the Halloween shop.
0:03:22 > 0:03:25- They only had one mask in the Halloween shop?- Yeah.
0:03:35 > 0:03:36Wait, look!
0:03:39 > 0:03:41Don't move!
0:03:41 > 0:03:42Hey!
0:03:48 > 0:03:50Whoa!
0:03:50 > 0:03:53- What are we gonna do? - We can make that.
0:03:53 > 0:03:55No, we can't! I've got short legs
0:03:55 > 0:03:58and definitely not with these bags of lead.
0:03:58 > 0:03:59I'll hold yer hand.
0:03:59 > 0:04:03- Fuck off.- Come on, that way if you don't make it, I can pull you up.
0:04:03 > 0:04:06What choice do we have?
0:04:06 > 0:04:07Fuck it. All right.
0:04:09 > 0:04:10On three?
0:04:11 > 0:04:13BOTH: One...
0:04:13 > 0:04:15Two...
0:04:15 > 0:04:17Three!
0:04:17 > 0:04:19AARGH!
0:04:24 > 0:04:26A-aargh!
0:04:33 > 0:04:35Let go of my fuckin' hand!
0:04:44 > 0:04:46Right, come on.
0:04:47 > 0:04:49Principal Walsh's daughters.
0:04:49 > 0:04:50Fuck!
0:04:53 > 0:04:56- Did they see our faces? - I don't know.
0:04:56 > 0:04:57- Fuck it! Come on!- Shit!
0:05:01 > 0:05:04Jock's become a bit of a legend around Cork city.
0:05:04 > 0:05:07No-one knows it's him behind the mask. They just call him...
0:05:07 > 0:05:08..Fake Billy.
0:05:08 > 0:05:10All right, Fake Billy?
0:05:10 > 0:05:14- Who's the girlfriend? - I'm not his girlfriend!
0:05:14 > 0:05:17- Fuck you!- Fuckin' langers!
0:05:24 > 0:05:26Oh, fuck! Fuck, shit...
0:05:28 > 0:05:29Will you fuckin' hurry up?
0:05:29 > 0:05:32You try doin' this on a racer!
0:05:33 > 0:05:35Jock, wait up!
0:05:36 > 0:05:39- What is it?- This lead is killin' me. I'm gettin' rid of it.
0:05:39 > 0:05:42Yeah, good idea, I left mine in the dumpster.
0:05:42 > 0:05:44Come on!
0:05:48 > 0:05:52This is the English Market in the centre of the city.
0:05:52 > 0:05:53And that's me mam.
0:05:53 > 0:05:54She works as a fishmonger.
0:05:54 > 0:05:56Mam had me when she was 16,
0:05:56 > 0:05:58which was old for our neighbourhood.
0:05:58 > 0:06:00The market is a lovely place for a bike ride
0:06:00 > 0:06:01if you ever get the chance.
0:06:01 > 0:06:03Sorry! Coming through!
0:06:06 > 0:06:08'Scuse me!
0:06:10 > 0:06:13- Sorry!- Fuck me!- You all right?
0:06:14 > 0:06:16Sorry about that!
0:06:16 > 0:06:19'Scuse me, coming through. Sorry! Sorry, like.
0:06:30 > 0:06:31Mam has fuck-all going for her.
0:06:31 > 0:06:33I mean, I'm pretty much her pride and joy.
0:06:33 > 0:06:35Little fuckin' knacker.
0:06:35 > 0:06:37Why is there always some dickhead
0:06:37 > 0:06:38painting something when you're in a hurry?
0:06:38 > 0:06:40Move, move, move!
0:06:43 > 0:06:46My good paint! Jesus!
0:06:46 > 0:06:48What the fuck's wrong with yous?
0:06:53 > 0:06:57Just keep rubbing it fast. I can see it coming off slowly.
0:06:57 > 0:07:01- I gotta get home for dinner. Mam's gonna kill me.- Not like this.
0:07:01 > 0:07:02Every guard in the city's looking
0:07:02 > 0:07:04for two kids covered in this yellow shit.
0:07:04 > 0:07:06What are we supposed to do so, go home naked?
0:07:16 > 0:07:18There's a lot of mad fuckers in our neighbourhood
0:07:18 > 0:07:22so you can get away with pretty much anything without being judged.
0:07:22 > 0:07:23Well... Most of the time.
0:07:54 > 0:07:56Gimme yer fuckin' wallets!
0:07:57 > 0:08:00Do we look like we got wallets?
0:08:00 > 0:08:03- Nah, go on.- See ya in school tomorrow, John-Paul.
0:08:08 > 0:08:10Jock says stealin' is only really stealin'
0:08:10 > 0:08:13when you rob somethin' people give a shit about.
0:08:13 > 0:08:15And no-one gives a flyin' fuck about school uniforms.
0:08:21 > 0:08:23We go to St Finan's Community School
0:08:23 > 0:08:25which is the only school in the country
0:08:25 > 0:08:27with a condom machine in the toilets.
0:08:27 > 0:08:30And this is our beloved principal, Barry Walsh.
0:08:34 > 0:08:35Your da's a prick!
0:08:38 > 0:08:41Fuckin' Walsh's daughters...
0:08:41 > 0:08:43Do you think they know it was us?
0:08:43 > 0:08:45Nah...
0:08:45 > 0:08:49- We'd have been arrested already if they did, like.- Yeah, that's true.
0:08:51 > 0:08:52- BOTH:- Bollocks!
0:08:53 > 0:08:55We're gonna have to use a carrot and a stick.
0:08:55 > 0:08:57Where we going to get them?
0:08:58 > 0:09:01No, ya tool, it's an expression.
0:09:01 > 0:09:05We try and get them on our side by danglin' a carrot in front of them.
0:09:05 > 0:09:08And if that doesn't work then we hit them with a stick.
0:09:08 > 0:09:09Why?
0:09:09 > 0:09:12Not a real carrot and not a real stick.
0:09:14 > 0:09:16We're just gonna go over an' flirt with them
0:09:16 > 0:09:18- and ask them to keep their mouths shut.- No!
0:09:20 > 0:09:22I can't talk to them, boy. They're girls.
0:09:24 > 0:09:27There's nothing to be scared of. Girls are just guys with tits.
0:09:27 > 0:09:29Just do exactly what I do.
0:09:29 > 0:09:31OK.
0:09:31 > 0:09:32Just do exactly what you do.
0:09:32 > 0:09:34- OK?- OK?
0:09:34 > 0:09:35- Not now.- Not now.
0:09:35 > 0:09:37- When we get up there...- Up there.
0:09:37 > 0:09:39- You don't have to do it now. - ..do it now.
0:09:39 > 0:09:41- Stop!- Stop!
0:09:41 > 0:09:43- Fuck off!- Fuck off!
0:09:48 > 0:09:50- How's it goin'?- How's it goin'?
0:09:50 > 0:09:53- Hi.- Would you look who it is?
0:09:53 > 0:09:55Fake Billy and his girlfriend.
0:09:55 > 0:09:58Shh! It's a secret.
0:09:58 > 0:09:59I'm not his girlfriend.
0:09:59 > 0:10:01Relax, babe.
0:10:04 > 0:10:06- Who knows?- Him.
0:10:06 > 0:10:10- Him.- Me. Me. Now the two of you. - Now the two of you.
0:10:11 > 0:10:13Promise not to tell anyone?
0:10:13 > 0:10:17- Depends. What's in it for us? - Come 'ere and I'll tell ya.
0:10:19 > 0:10:21- What's that?- What's what?
0:10:21 > 0:10:22That little spot there on your lip?
0:10:22 > 0:10:24That's just my lip.
0:10:25 > 0:10:26Is it on my lip now?
0:10:26 > 0:10:28- Yeah, it is.- Is it, yeah?
0:10:32 > 0:10:33You all right?
0:10:39 > 0:10:41INTERNALLY: Just copy what Jack does...
0:10:44 > 0:10:45Just copy...
0:10:51 > 0:10:53What are you doin'?
0:10:53 > 0:10:54I was lookin' over yer shoulder.
0:10:56 > 0:10:59And I thought I saw somethin' but it's gone now, so...
0:11:04 > 0:11:07- You're unreal at that. - You're not too bad yerself.
0:11:07 > 0:11:08Where'd you get that from?
0:11:08 > 0:11:10It's just practice, isn't it?
0:11:10 > 0:11:12I used to use, like, a load of tongue when I was younger.
0:11:12 > 0:11:14But you realise fast enough
0:11:14 > 0:11:16- that that's not really the best method.- Yeah, I know.
0:11:16 > 0:11:18You can never go with the washing machine. That just doesn't work.
0:11:18 > 0:11:19Let's do that again.
0:11:22 > 0:11:23What's, erm...
0:11:24 > 0:11:26..what's it like being adopted?
0:11:26 > 0:11:27I'm not adopted.
0:11:27 > 0:11:28Hmm.
0:11:30 > 0:11:31Is...? Er. OK.
0:11:33 > 0:11:36- Er...- Why? What makes you think I am adopted?
0:11:36 > 0:11:39No, like, I don't think you are, it's just...
0:11:39 > 0:11:42..er...you look adopted.
0:11:42 > 0:11:45How do I look adopted?
0:11:45 > 0:11:47Your hair is, like...really...
0:11:50 > 0:11:51..black.
0:11:51 > 0:11:53Trying to say I'm black?
0:11:53 > 0:11:55You're...you're black?
0:11:55 > 0:11:57I didn't even notice.
0:11:57 > 0:11:58- You didn't?- No.
0:11:58 > 0:11:59Are you serious?
0:11:59 > 0:12:04Oh, it's... You barely... Like, I see past pigment.
0:12:07 > 0:12:08Can we change the subject?
0:12:21 > 0:12:23Hi, sir.
0:12:28 > 0:12:30I need to speak to you two in my office, now. Go.
0:12:32 > 0:12:34See ya soon.
0:12:34 > 0:12:35Go, will ya? Go!
0:12:37 > 0:12:39I don't want you going near the two of them.
0:12:39 > 0:12:40- BOTH:- Why?
0:12:40 > 0:12:43- It's embarrassing, OK?- How is it embarrassing?
0:12:43 > 0:12:45It's embarrassing for you? It's embarrassing for us.
0:12:45 > 0:12:47We get picked on every day and you're just here making a scene?
0:12:47 > 0:12:48I'm the principal of the school.
0:12:48 > 0:12:52- Everyone's looking!- I'm your father, it's my school.
0:12:52 > 0:12:54- I don't want you being with those two lads.- You're making a scene.
0:12:54 > 0:12:56Look, I'll talk to you later on and you're in trouble.
0:12:56 > 0:12:58- You're in big trouble.- Yeah. - See you for dinner, so.
0:12:58 > 0:13:01- Right, that's it. You're both grounded as well.- I love you.
0:13:01 > 0:13:03- Yeah, you're not going anywhere. - Bye.- See you at dinner!
0:13:09 > 0:13:11This is the closest Healy has got to catching Jock
0:13:11 > 0:13:13in a whole year of chasing him.
0:13:13 > 0:13:15What a dickhead!
0:13:27 > 0:13:30Your daughters are fine-looking girls, Principal Walsh.
0:13:30 > 0:13:32You must be very proud.
0:13:32 > 0:13:35They have nice clear skin, which is rare for our age.
0:13:35 > 0:13:36Give me that!
0:13:39 > 0:13:42Two masked teenagers from this school are wanted for robbery
0:13:42 > 0:13:45and causing destruction of property in the city yesterday.
0:13:45 > 0:13:47They fit your description.
0:13:47 > 0:13:50- Imagine that.- Yeah, imagine. - Imagine that.- Imagine that.
0:13:50 > 0:13:53Sorry, I don't understand what you mean, our description?
0:13:53 > 0:13:58Well, one of them was tall, lanky, skinny, kind of goofy lookin'.
0:13:58 > 0:14:01- The other one...- Small and fat.
0:14:01 > 0:14:04Sort of ridiculous and slower. Much slower than the other one.
0:14:04 > 0:14:06There's lots of people that look like us.
0:14:06 > 0:14:09Our haircut, everyone copied us once we got our hair cut.
0:14:09 > 0:14:11People are even trying to grow to look like us.
0:14:11 > 0:14:13And shrink to look like us.
0:14:14 > 0:14:16Where were you yesterday, both of you?
0:14:16 > 0:14:19- Mm...- Not where you think we were, anyway.
0:14:19 > 0:14:22- No.- Oh, yeah? Where were you?- Where?
0:14:22 > 0:14:24With Con's mam.
0:14:24 > 0:14:27With your mam? With your mam?
0:14:27 > 0:14:28Yep.
0:14:28 > 0:14:30This was gonna hurt.
0:14:31 > 0:14:33Mam has only two gears -
0:14:33 > 0:14:35and one of them is broken.
0:14:35 > 0:14:36I'm just off the phone to your principal.
0:14:36 > 0:14:39What trouble has this dickhead got you into this time?
0:14:39 > 0:14:40What are you blaming him for?
0:14:40 > 0:14:43Cos you'd jump off a building if he fuckin' told you to.
0:14:43 > 0:14:45No, I wouldn't...
0:14:45 > 0:14:48- Would you jump off a building?- No.
0:14:48 > 0:14:49Stupid.
0:14:52 > 0:14:54A-a-argh!
0:14:54 > 0:14:56Did you not get me text?
0:14:56 > 0:14:59"If anyone asks, me and Jock were with you. Nice one."
0:14:59 > 0:15:00You for fuckin' real?
0:15:00 > 0:15:05- They said you're wanted for stealing.- That's strange.
0:15:05 > 0:15:08Definitely, I'd remember something like that.
0:15:08 > 0:15:10We didn't. We didn't.
0:15:10 > 0:15:11Where were you?
0:15:11 > 0:15:13Just...just hanging out, like.
0:15:13 > 0:15:15Well, he's bringing me into the fuckin' school tomorrow.
0:15:15 > 0:15:17Tell him that we were with you
0:15:17 > 0:15:19and it'll be fine, all right?
0:15:19 > 0:15:22You're a fuckin' tit-wreck of a child, you know that?
0:15:22 > 0:15:23I'd do what to a child?
0:15:23 > 0:15:24What?!
0:15:24 > 0:15:26I think you have smashing tits, Mairead.
0:15:26 > 0:15:30Jesus, Jock, would you fuck off to your own house?
0:15:30 > 0:15:32I was just complimenting...
0:15:34 > 0:15:37- See you later, yeah?- Yeah, I'll call over to you after dinner.
0:15:42 > 0:15:45Why are you always giving Jock such a hard time?
0:15:45 > 0:15:49Cos he's a total fuck-up and you're trying to be just like him.
0:15:49 > 0:15:50No, I'm not.
0:15:50 > 0:15:53- You don't know what he's really like.- No?
0:15:53 > 0:15:56Tell me, so. What's he really like?
0:15:59 > 0:16:01He's...he's sound.
0:16:03 > 0:16:08A laugh to be around. He's not like the other fellas in school.
0:16:08 > 0:16:09He makes me feel...
0:16:12 > 0:16:13..warm.
0:16:15 > 0:16:18Are you gay? Is that what this is?
0:16:18 > 0:16:20It's all right if you are. It would actually explain a lot.
0:16:20 > 0:16:21No, Mam, I'm not gay.
0:16:24 > 0:16:27But if I were, like, hypofarically... Hy...
0:16:27 > 0:16:31- Hypothetically.- Hypothetically, if I were,
0:16:31 > 0:16:34he'd be the guy I'd want to be gay with.
0:16:34 > 0:16:36I actually just got a mental picture of...
0:16:36 > 0:16:39- SHE LAUGHS - ..Jock bumming you.
0:16:40 > 0:16:41And it wasn't pretty!
0:16:41 > 0:16:44You think Jock would be bumming me?
0:16:44 > 0:16:46- I'd be bumming Jock!- No.
0:16:46 > 0:16:48- If anyone's bumming anyone...- No!
0:16:48 > 0:16:51No, Jock would be bumming you. You'd be his little bitch.
0:16:51 > 0:16:52We'd take it in turns.
0:16:54 > 0:16:55Oh, Jesus.
0:16:55 > 0:16:58Your dad was just like that. He'd always have a laugh like that.
0:17:08 > 0:17:10All we need to do is burn our uniforms
0:17:10 > 0:17:12and nothin' will get traced back to us.
0:17:12 > 0:17:14Me jumper's gone.
0:17:14 > 0:17:17Who the fuck would take a school jumper covered in paint?
0:17:17 > 0:17:18Whoo!
0:17:18 > 0:17:21MUSIC: Peter And The Wolf by Prokofiev
0:17:23 > 0:17:25CLANKING AND YELLING
0:17:31 > 0:17:35Billy Murphy?! When the hell did he get out?
0:17:35 > 0:17:38Not sure, but this could work out well for us.
0:17:38 > 0:17:40We just let him wear that jumper round town.
0:17:40 > 0:17:43The police will think it was him who did it.
0:17:43 > 0:17:44What?
0:17:46 > 0:17:50Mam stitched me name on the inside of that jumper.
0:17:50 > 0:17:51Come on.
0:17:54 > 0:17:55Hooo!
0:17:55 > 0:17:58- All right, Billy. - HE LAUGHS
0:17:58 > 0:18:00All right, Billy.
0:18:00 > 0:18:01SMASHING, CAT YOWLS
0:18:01 > 0:18:03All right, lads.
0:18:03 > 0:18:05What the fuck do you want?
0:18:08 > 0:18:10Nothin', just sayin' hi.
0:18:10 > 0:18:13And I definitely don't want that jumper you're wearin'.
0:18:13 > 0:18:15Why don't you want it?
0:18:15 > 0:18:18- Is there something wrong with it? - No. Just don't want it.
0:18:18 > 0:18:19It's not something I'd ever wear, like.
0:18:19 > 0:18:21Well, maybe I'll make ya wear it.
0:18:21 > 0:18:24There's no fuckin' way you would make me wear that thing.
0:18:24 > 0:18:27If I want you to wear it, you're going to fuckin' wear it, all right?
0:18:27 > 0:18:28Not a chance, boy!
0:18:28 > 0:18:30That's it. You'll fuckin' wear it!
0:18:30 > 0:18:33All right, all right, he'll wear it.
0:18:34 > 0:18:35Won't you, Jock?
0:18:37 > 0:18:38What?
0:18:41 > 0:18:43I've changed my mind.
0:18:43 > 0:18:46I thought you just said you were gonna make him wear it.
0:18:46 > 0:18:50No. Now I'm the one who's gonna wear it, all right?
0:18:51 > 0:18:54Great, cos I don't wanna wear it. It's a manky old thing.
0:18:54 > 0:18:57If I want you to wear it, you're gonna fuckin' wear it, all right?
0:18:58 > 0:19:01There's no way you'll ever get that jumper on him.
0:19:01 > 0:19:04Look, I'm fuckin' sick shit of the two of ye, all right?
0:19:04 > 0:19:05Give me your fags and your money
0:19:05 > 0:19:07or I'll kick the livin' shit out of the pair of ye.
0:19:07 > 0:19:08Come on!
0:19:13 > 0:19:15You're lucky I didn't give you a fuckin' dig.
0:19:18 > 0:19:20HE COUGHS AND GROANS
0:19:24 > 0:19:26Tell your mam I was askin' for her, all right?
0:19:41 > 0:19:43Hiya. How's it going?
0:19:46 > 0:19:49You're from the fish stall in the market, yeah?
0:19:49 > 0:19:50I'm the mackerel guy!
0:19:52 > 0:19:53That's what you say when you're serving me.
0:19:53 > 0:19:56I know who you are. What are you doing here?
0:19:56 > 0:19:58Got to question a few scumbags about a robbery.
0:19:58 > 0:20:00What about you?
0:20:00 > 0:20:02My son is not a scumbag.
0:20:05 > 0:20:06Fuck.
0:20:14 > 0:20:16Thanks for coming in, Ms MacSweeney.
0:20:24 > 0:20:26- Fifth time this year?- Fourth.- Oh.
0:20:30 > 0:20:34So, Conor and Jock said they were with you on Wednesday.
0:20:34 > 0:20:37That's correct. We went to the cinema.
0:20:38 > 0:20:39What did you go and see?
0:20:42 > 0:20:43One of the Batmans.
0:20:45 > 0:20:47I don't know which one.
0:20:47 > 0:20:50Don't ask me. I wasn't paying attention.
0:20:50 > 0:20:52- Which one?- The second one.
0:20:52 > 0:20:54Batman II.
0:20:54 > 0:20:57What came out about 40 years ago, you know that, yeah?
0:20:57 > 0:20:58Special screening.
0:20:58 > 0:21:01- We saw the editor's cut.- Mm-hm.
0:21:01 > 0:21:02What cinema did you go to?
0:21:02 > 0:21:05ALL ANSWER DIFFERENTLY
0:21:06 > 0:21:08Can we cut the bullshit, yeah?
0:21:08 > 0:21:10Cut the bullshit?
0:21:10 > 0:21:13I came here of my own free will to answer one simple fuckin' question.
0:21:13 > 0:21:17Was my son Conor and his friend Jock with me on Wednesday?
0:21:17 > 0:21:19And the answer's yes.
0:21:19 > 0:21:20We went to see a film.
0:21:20 > 0:21:24Me, Conor, Jock. Got popcorn.
0:21:24 > 0:21:25End of fuckin' story.
0:21:39 > 0:21:41Do you recognise this?
0:21:41 > 0:21:44- The same...- One there.
0:21:44 > 0:21:46One there.
0:21:46 > 0:21:47Guards on patrol retrieved it
0:21:47 > 0:21:50from a homeless fella seen wearing it around town.
0:21:50 > 0:21:51Give us the jumper.
0:21:51 > 0:21:52You're not fuckin' getting it!
0:21:57 > 0:21:59Try it on.
0:21:59 > 0:22:02It smells and it's dirty, like. I'm not putting this on.
0:22:02 > 0:22:03Put the fuckin' thing on!
0:22:09 > 0:22:11It's just my size. Can I keep it?
0:22:19 > 0:22:24When it comes to delay tactics, I'm pretty much an expert.
0:22:24 > 0:22:26I'll hold your head. You'll push your head out forward.
0:22:26 > 0:22:28- All right, that's it!- Push.
0:22:29 > 0:22:31Argh!
0:22:40 > 0:22:42Well, you know what they say.
0:22:42 > 0:22:45If the slipper fits,
0:22:45 > 0:22:46you've found your glove.
0:22:53 > 0:22:54What have you got there?
0:22:57 > 0:22:59- MAIREAD:- Get off of him!
0:22:59 > 0:23:00- Come on.- Hold his nose!
0:23:00 > 0:23:02Hold his nose!
0:23:02 > 0:23:04- Open your fuckin' mouth. - Don't open it, Con.
0:23:05 > 0:23:06Swallow it.
0:23:10 > 0:23:12GASPING FOR BREATH
0:23:28 > 0:23:31I bet they're gonna do that good cop, dickhead cop thing.
0:23:31 > 0:23:32Yeah, definitely.
0:23:32 > 0:23:36Your mam'll be the good cop, the other two will be the dickheads.
0:23:36 > 0:23:40You know I'd go to prison for you in the mornin' if you asked me to.
0:23:40 > 0:23:43I'd do the same for you, but we're goin' to get through this.
0:23:43 > 0:23:45I'm telling ya, the plan will work.
0:23:47 > 0:23:48We stick with it.
0:24:03 > 0:24:06Jock, we want to speak to Conor on his own for a minute.
0:24:06 > 0:24:08No, I want Jock here.
0:24:08 > 0:24:11- I'm goin' to advise him. - You mean intimidate?
0:24:11 > 0:24:15- Intimate?- Not intimate, intimidate.
0:24:15 > 0:24:17And you know exactly what I mean!
0:24:17 > 0:24:19Not really. Which one was I doin' with your daughter yesterday?
0:24:19 > 0:24:21That was intimate I think, not the other one.
0:24:21 > 0:24:22Can we get on with this?
0:24:28 > 0:24:31Conor, they have yer school jumper, they know it was you.
0:24:31 > 0:24:35Sgt Healy has promised, if you tell the truth, he won't press charges.
0:24:35 > 0:24:38What, so they can arrest Jock instead, is it?
0:24:38 > 0:24:41People take home the wrong school jumper all the time.
0:24:41 > 0:24:44Why do you think she felt the need to name tag it in the first place?
0:24:44 > 0:24:47- We didn't do nothin'. - Why are you covering for him?
0:24:47 > 0:24:48Do you really think he'd do the same for you?
0:24:48 > 0:24:51He's like an addict, covering for his addiction.
0:24:51 > 0:24:53- No, I'm not.- Yes, you are.
0:24:53 > 0:24:57If Jock were a powder you'd be injecting him or snorting him.
0:24:57 > 0:24:58So what if I was snorting him?
0:24:58 > 0:25:02Better snortin' him than one of them other borin' pricks in my year.
0:25:02 > 0:25:03Watch your language.
0:25:03 > 0:25:07- What did I say?- You said prick. - Prick's not a bad word.
0:25:07 > 0:25:10- Yes, it is.- Is prick a bad word?
0:25:11 > 0:25:13Yes, it is, and stop saying it.
0:25:13 > 0:25:15Shit and fuck are bad words, prick's just a bit of fun.
0:25:15 > 0:25:17Prick is just as bad as shit and fuck.
0:25:17 > 0:25:18You're not allowed say any of them!
0:25:18 > 0:25:19What about cunt?
0:25:23 > 0:25:24What?
0:25:24 > 0:25:28Conor. Please, don't make me one of them single mothers
0:25:28 > 0:25:29with a convicted son.
0:25:29 > 0:25:32Youth Detention Centres are designed to help people like Jock,
0:25:32 > 0:25:35but it won't suit a cute little fella like you.
0:25:35 > 0:25:37Trust me.
0:25:37 > 0:25:38You know what?
0:25:40 > 0:25:41You all have it in for Jock.
0:25:43 > 0:25:44Everyone does.
0:25:46 > 0:25:48The only person that's on his side is me
0:25:48 > 0:25:50and you're sayin' I should fuck him over.
0:25:54 > 0:25:55He's so misjudged, like.
0:25:59 > 0:26:00He doesn't have it easy,
0:26:00 > 0:26:03but he doesn't bitch and moan about it like most people.
0:26:05 > 0:26:08He rarely says nasty stuff about anyone.
0:26:10 > 0:26:12And he's gonna be one of them fellas
0:26:12 > 0:26:14who does something great with his life.
0:26:18 > 0:26:21There's no way in hell I'd ever turn my back on him
0:26:21 > 0:26:22so you can all fuck off.
0:26:24 > 0:26:26All right, then.
0:26:26 > 0:26:28You leave me with no choice.
0:26:37 > 0:26:39Have you nothing to say for yourself?
0:26:39 > 0:26:42- Yeah. You can suck my... - BELL RINGS
0:26:48 > 0:26:51YELLING AND CHEERING
0:27:09 > 0:27:11Get out of it, you little pricks!
0:27:17 > 0:27:18Little scum.
0:27:28 > 0:27:30I'm so sorry about the misunderstanding.
0:27:30 > 0:27:34It's not me you should be apologising to.
0:27:34 > 0:27:36Don't worry about it, Principal Walsh.
0:27:36 > 0:27:38Everyone makes enormous mistakes sometimes.
0:27:59 > 0:28:01Is there a fag machine inside there?
0:28:02 > 0:28:03Not in the school.
0:28:03 > 0:28:06Down at the corner, Mary's.
0:28:06 > 0:28:08See ya.
0:28:08 > 0:28:10- Prick.- Who said that?
0:28:10 > 0:28:11Who said that?!
0:28:14 > 0:28:16Told ya it would work.
0:28:16 > 0:28:18I didn't say it wouldn't, I just said it was risky.
0:28:18 > 0:28:21It's amazing what people will do for two bags of lead.
0:28:21 > 0:28:23We can't do it until after GAA practice.
0:28:23 > 0:28:25That's fine. Just make sure Conor and Jock
0:28:25 > 0:28:27are with Principal Walsh when it happens.
0:28:27 > 0:28:29We're from Northern Ireland.
0:28:34 > 0:28:37How did you do them real tears?
0:28:37 > 0:28:38I just taught about my dad dyin'.
0:28:38 > 0:28:40Cool.
0:28:56 > 0:29:00Everyone says I'm forever mimicking Jock, but that's a load of bollocks.
0:29:00 > 0:29:03We're just best friends and we like the same shit.
0:29:03 > 0:29:05Anyone who has a best friend would understand that.
0:29:41 > 0:29:42We own this city.
0:29:45 > 0:29:47It's ours.